Avow

CHAPTER 30

“It’s so early.” Scarlet stretched her arms above her head.

Tristan shifted in his seat across from her at the table in Nate’s lab. His dark hair was tousled and long enough to hang in his eyes and the black T-shirt he wore stretched across his shoulders in a way that made the butterflies in her stomach want to dance.

Dropping her arms, she looked away from him and yawned. The professor had loaded her up with ancestry books before she left his office last night and Scarlet had stayed up until the early hours of dawn searching through their pages for any sign of her relatives. She found nothing. Kirk was going to make a call to someone in Avalon to see about family documents so maybe they’d have better luck there.

Tristan stretched his neck, his trap muscles moving as he did so, and Scarlet’s butterflies started to waltz. Damn him and all his muscles.

He shifted again, scooting his chair back even farther than he had the last three times he’d moved since they’d sat down. The good doctor was only ten minutes late and Tristan was already halfway to the door in his chair.

Even though they’d seen each other at Nate’s house a few times—apparently, Tristan and Nate were best friends now—she and Tristan barely spoke. Half of her was fine with that, but the other half—the stupid half—wanted to climb into his arms and beg him to love her and kiss her and touch her until she died.

He shifted again.

“Really?” Scarlet blinked. “What’s your plan here? Are you going to scoot your way out of the lab?”

He rubbed the back of his neck. “I just don’t want to be here.”

“Neither do I, but you don’t see me squeaking my way to the door with my grumpy face on.” She leaned back in her chair. “Are you really that uncomfortable around me?”

“Yes.”

“Why? We’re not touching. There’s an entire lab table between us and if anyone should be freaking out about us hanging out in the same room, it should be me, remember? The girl who keeps dying? Unless you’re planning on accidentally falling on top of me, I’m pretty sure you can relax.”

He flexed his jaw. “I’m not stressed about touching you, Scar.”

Scar.

“Then what is your deal?”

He stared at her. “I can feel you.”

“Oh.” Oh.

Note to self: no more touching Tristan thoughts.

She tried to act casual. “Well, get over it.”

He scoffed and tipped his head back. “Right.”

She watched his Adam’s apple move as he swallowed.

“See?” He brought his face down. “Like that. What the hell was that?”

“What are you talking about?”

“Good morning!” Nate grinned as he entered the lab. He shuffled around the table between them and picked up a needle. “So,” he lifted the needle in the air, “who wants to give blood first?”

Four hours later, Tristan sighed into the strained silence and kept his eyes fixed on the ceiling. He and Scarlet hadn’t spoken since Nate entered the lab and started drawing their blood and monitoring their vitals.

“So,” Nate attempted conversation for the third time. He seemed to be in a better mood lately. “Do you guys maybe want to talk about how very uncomfortable this is?” He smiled tightly, looking first at Tristan, then at Scarlet. “Because I don’t know about you, but I feel awk-ward. Let’s hash it out, shall we? Tristan,” Nate said brightly. “We’ll start with you. How are you feeling?”

“Annoyed.”

“I like your honesty and openness.” Nate turned to Scarlet. “What about you? How are you feeling?”

“Tired,” she said. “Nine in the morning is too early for needles.”

Tristan said, “Maybe if you hadn’t stayed out so late, you wouldn’t be so tired.”

Scarlet said, “Look who’s decided to speak again. Suddenly, the silent and dark Tristan has an opinion on my life.”

“Oh, I have many opinions.”

“See?” Nate said, his smile tighter than before. “Isn’t all this openness refreshing?”

“Like what?” Scarlet glared at Tristan.

“For one,” he said, not sure why he was provoking her. “I don’t like how you snuck off to a secret meeting last night.”

She curled her lip. “How do you know about that?”

Nate swallowed audibly and Scarlet turned her eyes to him. “You tattled on me?”

“I was not tattling. I was making small talk. You’re the one being all secretive about guys named Kirk—“

“Kirk?” Tristan’s veins were on fire. “You’re sneaking off in the middle of the night to hang out with a guy?”

Who the hell was Kirk?

She made a face. “Since when do you care about my life? You certainly didn’t care all that much a hundred years ago.”

Tristan’s gut dropped.

Nate held up a hand. “Okay, maybe less openness is better.”

“All I’m saying,” Tristan leaned forward on his elbows, “is that your late night activities are suspicious. I don’t know who this Kirk guy is, but—“

“Kirk is none of your business.”

“Like hell. I don’t want you slinking around in the middle of the night with some random guy you don’t even know.”

“And I don’t want you making out with some slutty redhead after you just beat the crap out of someone. But we don’t always get what we want, do we?”

Hurt, pain, sadness, betrayal.

Tristan felt his defenses waiver and knew he was close to caving. He couldn’t stand hurting her. The pain she felt…the pain he caused her….

He needed to calm down before he did something stupid—like jump across the table and kiss her until things like curses and redheads and Kirks no longer existed.

He lowered his voice. “That was different—“

“Different how? Do you usually go for blondes?”

“And…openness time is over.” Nate started undoing tubes and wires from both Tristan and Scarlet.

Tristan stared at Scarlet. “Stop it.”

“Stop what? Stop bringing up the past?” She waved her hands in a spooky way. “God forbid we talk about something real. Like how you made me watch you stick your tongue in someone else’s mouth.”

“And on that note,” Nate smiled at them, “I’m leaving. I think I’ve got everything I need from you two. Good luck with all your relationship drama. Glad to see you kids are finally working things out. And by ‘working things out’, I mean bickering like an old divorced couple. So fun.” He gave a curt nod. “See you later.”

Sharp hurt rose up inside Scarlet and Tristan hated himself.

“First of all,” he lowered his voice and pointed at her, wishing he could grab the pain inside her and stomp it into the ground, “my tongue stayed in my mouth. Second, I had no choice.”

“Funny. I didn’t see a gun pointed at your head.”

“I did it to keep you safe.”

“What?” Her eyes were incredulous.

“You came after me even when you knew you would die.” He thrust his hands out, his heart pounding in fear thinking about how careless she’d been.

“Because you were in pain.”

“So you risked your life?”

“Of course!” Love exploded in her chest and he wanted to scream.

“And that, that right there, is why I did what I did in your last life. To keep you safe from me—from yourself. You reckless woman.”

“You thought kissing another girl in front of me would keep me safe? Safe?!” Scarlet’s mouth dropped open. “You crushed me.”

“I was trying to keep you alive.”

“And I still died, Tristan!” Her face was flushed. “The only difference was I died with a broken heart!”

“And I’ve hated myself for it every day since.” He inhaled, his eyes wild and hot. “But I don’t regret it.”

He was so worked up he didn’t know if the pain and hurt and love he felt was his or Scarlet’s.

Her lips parted as she stared at him, defeat and sadness taking over all the emotions in the room. “Well, that makes one of us.”

And then she left, her heart breaking in her chest and falling to pieces in his.