Beautiful Darkness

Vexed

It's not what you think.

What do I think?

She pushed John away as I crossed the dance floor. He turned around, his eyes black and menacing. Then he smiled to let me know I wasn't a threat. He knew I was no match for him physically, and after seeing him and Lena on the dance floor together, I bet he didn't consider me any other kind of threat anymore.

What did I think?

I knew I was in the moment before the thing happens -- the thing that changes your life forever. It was like time stopped, even though everything around me was still moving. The thing I had dreaded for months was actually happening. Lena was slipping through my fingers. And it wasn't because of her birthday, or her mother and Hunting, or any curse or Cast or attack.

It was another guy.

Ethan! You have to go.

I'm not going anywhere.

Ridley stepped in front of me, the dancers swelling around us. "Slow down, Boyfriend. I knew you had guts, but this is crazy." She sounded concerned, like she actually gave a crap about what happened to me. It was a lie, like everything else about her.

"Get out of my way, Ridley."

"You're done here, Short Straw."

"Sorry, the lollipops don't work on me, or whatever you and John are using to manipulate Lena."

She grabbed my arm, her icy fingers cutting into my skin. I had forgotten how strong she was, and how cold. She lowered her voice. "Don't be stupid. You're way out of your league and way out of your mind."

"You should know."

She tightened her grip on my arm. "You don't wanna do this. You shouldn't be in here. Go home before --"

"Before what? Before you cause even more trouble than usual?" Link caught up to me. Ridley locked eyes with him. For a second, I thought there was a flutter, the slightest spark in her eye, like the sight of Link called up something almost human in her. Something that made her as vulnerable as he was. It disappeared as quickly as it had surfaced.

Ridley was rattled and starting to panic. I could tell by the way she was unwrapping a lollipop before she could even get the words out of her mouth. "What the hell are you doing here? Get out of here now, and take him with you." The playful tone was gone. "Go!" She shoved us both as hard as she could.

I stood my ground. "I'm not going until I talk to Lena."

"She doesn't want you here."

"She'll have to tell me that herself."

Say it to my face, L.

Lena was winding her way through the crowd. John Breed hung back, his eyes fixed on us. I didn't want to imagine what she must have said to him to keep him there. That she would handle this? It was nothing, just a guy who couldn't get over her? Some desperate Mortal who couldn't compete with everything she had now?

Like him.

She had John, and he had me beat in the only way that counted. He was part of her world.

I'm not leaving unless you say it.

Ridley dropped her voice, more serious than I'd ever seen her. "We don't have time to screw around. I know you're bent outta shape, but you don't understand. He'll kill you, and if you're lucky, the rest of them won't join in for fun."

"Who, Vampire Boy? We can take him." Link was lying, but there was no way he wouldn't go down swinging, either for me or for her.

Ridley shook her head, pushing him farther back. "You can't, you idiot. This is no place for a couple of Boy Scouts. Get out of here." She reached for Link's cheek, but he grabbed her wrist before she could touch him. Ridley was like a beautiful snake -- you couldn't let her get close without the risk of being bitten.

Lena was only a few feet away.

If you don't want me here, tell me yourself.

A part of me believed if we were close enough, I could break whatever hold Ridley and John had over her.

Lena stopped behind Ridley. Her expression was unreadable, but I could see the silvery streak where a single tear had fallen.

Say it, L. Say it, or come with me.

Lena's eyes flickered, and she looked past me to where Liv was standing at the edge of the dance floor.

"Lena, you shouldn't be here. I don't know what Ridley and John are doing to you --"

"No one is doing anything to me, and I'm not the one in danger here. I'm not a Mortal." Lena looked over at Liv.

Like her.

Lena's face darkened, and I could see her stray curls beginning to twist.

"You're not like them either, L."

The lights in the bar flickered, and the bulbs shattered over the dance floor, sending sparks and tiny pieces of glass over both of us. The crowd, even that crowd, started moving away from us. "You're wrong. I am like them. This is where I belong."

"Lena, we can figure this out."

"No, we can't, Ethan. Not this."

"Haven't we made it through everything else together?"

"No. Not together. You don't know anything about me anymore." For a second, something passed across her face. Sadness, maybe? Regret?

I wish things could be different, but they can't.

She started to walk away.

I can't go where you're going, Lena.

I know.

You'll be all alone.

She didn't turn around.

I'm already alone, Ethan.

Then tell me to go. If that's what you really want.

She stopped walking and turned slowly to look at me.

"I don't want you here, Ethan." Lena disappeared across the dance floor, away from me. Before I could take a step, I heard the rip --

John Breed materialized in front of me, black leather jacket and all. "Me neither."

We were only a few feet apart. "I'm going, but it's not because of you." He smiled, and his green eyes glowed.

I turned and pushed my way through the crowd. I didn't care if I pissed off someone who could drink my blood or make me jump off a cliff. I kept moving because more than anything else, I wanted to get out of there. The heavy wooden door slammed behind me, shutting out the music, the lights, and the Casters.

But it didn't shut out what I was hoping for. The image of his hands on her hips, swaying to the music, her twisting black hair. Lena in the arms of some other guy.

I barely noticed as the alley turned from modern-day asphalt and filth back to cobblestones. How long had it been going on, and what had happened between them?

Casters and Mortals can't be together. That's what the visions were telling me, as if the Caster world didn't think I understood by now.

I heard the sound of footsteps echoing against the cobblestones behind me. "Ethan, are you okay?" Liv put her hand on my shoulder. I hadn't realized she was following me.

I turned around, but I didn't know what to say. I was standing on a street out of the past, in an underground Caster Tunnel, thinking about Lena with some guy who was my polar opposite. A guy who could take whatever I had, whenever he wanted. Tonight had proven it.

"I don't know what to do. This isn't Lena. Ridley and John have some kind of hold on her."

Liv bit her bottom lip nervously. "I know it's not what you want to hear, but Lena's making her own decisions."

Liv didn't understand. She had never seen what Lena was really like before Macon died and John Breed showed up. "There's no way you can be sure. You heard Aunt Marian. We don't know what kind of powers John has."

"I can't imagine how hard this is for you." Liv was speaking in absolutes, and there was nothing absolute about what was happening to Lena and to me.

"You don't know her --"

Liv's voice dropped to a whisper. "Ethan, her eyes are gold."

The words echoed in my head, like I was underwater. My emotions sank like a stone as logic and reason fought their way to the surface.

Her eyes are gold.

It was such a small detail, but it meant everything. No one could force her to go Dark, or make her eyes turn gold.

Lena wasn't being controlled. No one was using the Power of Persuasion to manipulate her into jumping onto the back of John's bike. No one was forcing her to be with him. She was making her own choices, and she was choosing him. I don't want you here, Ethan. I heard the words over and over. Which wasn't even the worst part. She meant them.

Everything felt hazy and slow, like none of this could really be happening.

Liv's face was full of concern as she stared up at me with her blue eyes. There was something soothing about their blueness -- not the green of a Light Caster, or the black of an Incubus, or the gold of a Dark Caster. She was different from Lena in the most important way. She was a Mortal. Liv wasn't going to go Light or Dark or run off with a guy with superhuman strength who could suck your blood or steal your dreams while you slept. Liv was training to be a Keeper, but even then she would still be an observer. Like me, she would never really be part of the Caster world. Right then, there was nothing I wanted more than to be as far away from that world as I could get.

"Ethan?"

But I didn't answer her. I pushed her shiny blond hair away from her face and leaned down, our faces only inches apart. She inhaled softly, our lips so close I could feel her breath and the scent of her skin, like honeysuckle in the springtime. She smelled like sweet tea and old books, like she had always been here.

I pulled my fingers through her hair and held it at the back of her neck. Her skin was soft and warm, like a Mortal girl's. There was no electric current, no shocks. We could kiss for as long as we wanted. If we had a fight, there wouldn't be a flood or a hurricane, or even a storm. I wouldn't find her on the ceiling of her bedroom. No windows would shatter. No exams would catch fire.

Liv held up her face to be kissed.

She wanted me. Not lemons and rosemary, not green eyes and black hair. Blue eyes and blond hair ...

I didn't realize I was Kelting, reaching out for someone who wasn't there. I pulled away so fast, Liv didn't have time to react. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that."

Liv's voice was shaky, and she put her hand on her neck, where my hands had been a moment before. "It's okay."

It wasn't. I watched the emotions play out in her eyes -- disappointment, embarrassment, regret. "It's no big deal." She was lying. Her cheeks were flushed, and she was staring at the ground. "You're upset about Lena. I get it."

"Liv, I'm --"

Link's voice interrupted my lame attempt at an apology. "Hey, man, nice exit. Thanks for ditchin' me." He pretended he was joking, but his voice was edgy. "At least your cat waited for me." Lucille was trotting casually behind him.

"How did she get here?" I bent down to scratch her head, and she purred. Liv didn't look at either of us.

"Who knows? That cat's as crazy as your great-aunts. It was probably followin' you."

We started walking, and even Link could feel the weight of the silence. "So what happened back there? Was Lena with Vampire Boy, or what?" I didn't want to think about it, but I could tell he was trying not to think about someone, too. Ridley wasn't just under his skin. She was crawling around in there.

Liv was walking a foot or so ahead of us, but she was listening.

"I don't know. That's how it looked." There was no point in trying to deny it.

"The Doorwell should be straight ahead." Liv held her head high and almost tripped over a cobblestone. I could see how awkward things were going to be between us. How many things could a guy screw up in one day? I had probably set some kind of record.

Link put his hand on my shoulder. "I'm sorry, dude. That's real --" Liv stopped so fast neither of us noticed, until Link bumped right into her. "Hey, what's up, MJ?" Link nudged Liv with his elbow playfully.

But she didn't move or make a sound. Lucille froze, the hair on her back standing on end, her eyes transfixed. I followed her gaze to see what she was staring at, but I had no idea what it was. There was a shadow across the street, lurking just inside a stone archway. It was formless, a dense fog, constantly shifting in a way that gave it shape. It was wrapped in some kind of material, like a shroud or a cloak. It had no eyes, but I could tell it was watching us.

Link took a step backward. "What the --"

"Shh." Liv hissed. "Don't attract its attention." The color drained from her face.

"I think it's too late for that," I whispered. The thing, whatever it was, shifted slightly, moving closer to the street and to us.

I took her hand without thinking. It was buzzing, and I realized it wasn't her hand but the contraption on her wrist. Every dial was spinning. Liv stared at its face, unbuckling the black plastic strap to get a better look.

"I'm getting insane readings," she whispered.

"I thought you made that up."

"I did," she whispered again. "At first."

"Then what? What does it mean?"

"I have no idea." She couldn't take her eyes off the device, but the black shadow shifted closer to us.

"I hate to bother you when you're having so much fun with your watch, but what is that thing? A Sheer?"

She looked up from the spinning dials, her hand shaking in mine. "I wish. It's a Vex. I've only read about them. I've never seen one, and I bloody well hoped I never would."

"Fascinatin'. Why don't we bolt and talk about this later?" The Doorwell was in sight, but Link was already turning around, willing to take his chances with the Dark Casters and creatures at Exile.

"Don't run." Liv put her hand on Link's arm. "They can Travel, disappear and materialize anywhere faster than you can blink."

"Like an Incubus."

She nodded. "This could explain why we saw so many Sheers at Exile. It's possible they were responding to some kind of disturbance in the natural order. The Vex is most likely that disturbance."

"Speak English, real English." Link was panicking.

"Vexes are part of the Demon world, the Underground. They're the closest things to pure evil in the Caster or Mortal world." Liv's voice was shaky.

The Vex continued to move slightly, as if it was being blown by the wind. But it didn't come any closer. It seemed to be waiting for something.

"They aren't Sheers, ghosts as you call them. Vexes don't have a physical being, unless they possess the living. They have to be summoned from the Underground by someone very powerful, for only the Darkest tasks."

"Hello. We're already underground." Link didn't take his eyes off the Vex.

"Not the kind of Underground I'm talking about."

"What does it want with us?" Link risked a glance down the street, mentally calculating the distance to Exile.

The Vex began to move, dissolving into mist and back into shadow again.

"I think we're about to find out." I squeezed Liv's hand, trembling in my own.

The black fog, the Vex itself, thrust forward like angry open jaws. And a sound, loud and shrill, erupted from deep within. It was impossible to describe -- fierce and menacing like a roar, but terrifying like a scream. Lucille hissed, her ears flattening against her head. The sound intensified, and the Vex reared back, rising above us as if it was planning to attack. I pushed Liv to the ground and tried to shield her body with mine. I covered my neck, like I was about to be devoured by a grizzly bear instead of a body-snatching Demon.

I thought about my mom. Was this how she felt when she knew she was about to die?

I thought about Lena.

The scream reached a crescendo, and I heard another sound rising above it, a familiar voice. But it wasn't my mother's, or Lena's.

"Dark Demon a the Devil, bend to Our will and leave this place!" I looked up and saw them standing behind us under the lamplight. She was holding a string of beads and bone in front of her like a crucifix, and they were gathered around her, glowing and luminous, with purpose in their eyes.

Amma and the Greats.

I can't explain what it was like to see Amma and four generations of the spirits of her ancestors towering above her, like the faces from old black and white pictures. I recognized Ivy from the visions, her dark skin gleaming, dressed in a high-necked blouse and calico skirt. But she looked more intimidating than she had in the visions, and the only one who looked fiercer stood to her right, her hand on Ivy's shoulder. She had a ring on every finger, and she was wearing a long dress that looked like it had been stitched from silk scarves, with a tiny bird embroidered on the shoulder. I was staring at Sulla the Prophet, and she made Amma look about as harmless as a Sunday school teacher.

There were two other women, most likely Aunt Delilah and Sister, and an old man, his face punished by the sun, standing in the back with a beard that would've put Moses to shame. Uncle Abner. I wished I had some Wild Turkey for him.

The Greats tightened their circle around Amma, chanting the same verse again and again, in Gullah, the original language of her family. Amma repeated the same verse in English, shaking the beads and bone, shouting to the heavens.

"Of Vengeance and Wrath, Bind the Suspended, Hasten his path."

The Vex rose even higher, the fog and shadow circling and swirling above Amma and the Greats. Its scream was deafening, but Amma didn't even flinch. She closed her eyes and raised her voice to meet the demonic cry.

"Of Vengeance and Wrath, Bind the Suspended, Hasten his path."

Sulla raised her bracelet-laden arm, spinning a long stick with dozens of tiny charms dangling from it, back and forth between her fingers. She took her hand from Ivy's shoulder and rested it on Amma's, her glowing, translucent skin glimmering in the darkness. The second her hand touched Amma's shoulder, the Vex let out a final gnarled cry and was sucked into the void of the night sky.

Amma turned to the Greats. "I'm much obliged."

The Greats disappeared, as if they had never been there at all.

It probably would've been better if I had disappeared with the Greats, because one look at Amma's face made it clear that she had only saved us so she could kill us herself. We would've had better odds against the Vex.

Amma was seething, her eyes narrow and focused on her main targets, Link and me.

"V. E. X. A. T. I. O. N." She grabbed us by our collars at the same time, as if she could have thrown us up the Doorwell behind her with a single toss. "As in, trouble. Worry. Agitation. Botheration. Need me to go on?"

We shook our heads.

"Ethan Lawson Wate. Wesley Jefferson Lincoln. I don't know what business the two a you think you have down in these Tunnels." She was shaking her bony finger as she pointed at us. "You don't have a lick a sense between you, but you think you're ready to be battlin' Dark forces."

Link tried to explain. Big mistake. "Amma, we weren't tryin' to battle any Dark forces. Honest. We were just --"

Amma advanced, that finger barely an inch from Link's eyes. "Don't you tell me. When I get through with you, you're gonna wish I'd told your mamma about what you were doin' in my basement when you were nine years old." He backed up until he hit the wall behind him, next to the Doorwell. Amma matched him step for step. "That story's as sad as the day is long."

Amma turned to Liv. "And you're studyin' to be a Keeper. But you don't have any more sense than they do. Knowin' what you do and still lettin' these boys drag you into this dangerous business. You're in a world a trouble with Marian." Liv slunk down a few inches.

Amma whipped around to face me. "And you." She was so angry she was talking with her jaw clenched. "You think I don't know what you're up to? You think because I'm an old woman, you can fool me? It'll take you three lifetimes before you can sell me a raft that doesn't float. Soon as Marian told me you were down here, I found you straightaway." I didn't ask her how she'd found us. Whether it was chicken bones or tarot cards or the Greats, she had her ways. Amma was the closest thing I'd ever seen to a Supernatural without actually being one.

I didn't look her in the eye. It was like avoiding a dog attack. Don't make eye contact. Keep your head down and your mouth shut. Instead, I kept walking, with Link looking back at Amma every few steps. Liv wandered behind us, confused. I knew she hadn't counted on a run-in with a Vex, but Amma was more than she could handle.

Amma shuffled along behind us, muttering to herself or the Greats. Who knew? "Think you're the only one who can find somethin'? Don't need to be a Caster to see what you fools are up to." I could hear the bones rattling against the beads. "Why do you think they call me a Seer? Because I can see the mess you're into just as soon as you're into it."

She was still shaking her head as she disappeared up the Doorwell, not a speck of mud on her sleeves or a rumple in her dress. What had felt like a rabbit hole on the way down was a broad stairwell on the way up, as if it had expanded out of respect for Miss Amma herself.

"Takin' on a Vex, as if a day with this child wasn't trouble enough ..." She sniffed with every step. It went on like that the whole way back. We dropped Liv off on our way through the Tunnels, but Link and I kept walking. We didn't want to be too close to that finger, or those beads.