Chosen of Mida

14 A feast—and the concern of males

The skies were gray, as though considering rain, and a sharp breeze had sprung up to cool the heat of the fey; I stood with face up and body alive, drinking in the unmatchable majesty of it all. I felt as though I had been indoors and underground forever, and the sensation of such openness was nigh unto ecstasy.

“Should you stand there much longer, wench, Aysayn will think us missing,” came the voice of Mehrayn from behind me, more amusement than impatience to be heard. “As there is food awaiting us, I would reach his apartments as soon as possible. I have not eaten as recently as you, nor as well. This porch will continue to be here even after the feast.”

I sighed at the thought of provender and turned away from the skies, feeling a lingering trace of the deep, gnawing hunger which I had felt earlier. Though I had already eaten a full fey’s provender less than a hin earlier, I felt as though I were nearly ready to do the same again.

Mehrayn walked beside me as we entered the large dwelling containing Aysayn’s chambers, his hand upon my neck beneath my hair toying with the leather of my life sign. That life sign had been upon me when I had awakened at first light in Mehrayn’s dwelling, vital and alive and entirely unwounded after the passing of no more than a single darkness. Mehrayn had awakened as I moved about and sat up, and had given thanks to Sigurr that he had surmised correctly. After he and the others had found me in Aysayn’s chambers, it had been he who had forced the whereabouts of my life sign from an hysterical Ladayna, and then replaced it about my neck. It had come to him that my previous wound had been healed when the life sign had been upon me, and he had hoped to see the same thing done again. That bruises and light wounds were not similarly healed mattered not; it was the deep wounds which affected me most. He had then put his arms about me and pressed his lips to mine, thereby confirming a second surmise: I felt naught from his arms and lips, and had not the least desire for him. The strange life sign given me by Mida and Sigurr assured my survival even gravely wounded, yet also assured that I would find no interest in any male. The first condition was easily understandable; the second was not.

Those black-clad males passed in the halls gave Mehrayn small bows of respect and some, to my surprise, gave the same to me. The guardsmen standing without Aysayn’s doors allowed us immediate entry, and we quickly traversed the corridor which led to his chambers. Both doors stood widely opened, and a goodly number of males already made effort toward filling the large chamber. Platforms laden with fresh-cooked provender lined the walls of the chamber, tended by red-clad female slaves who hurried to and fro, seeing to the needs of the males who stood and sat about. Aysayn sat upon a seat to the right of the doors, other unoccupied seats near to his, and when we appeared, his eyes came to us immediately. Mehrayn wore the same thigh-length black covering as did he, therefore was the inspection of Sigurr’s Sword brief; I, clad in reclaimed breech of leather, Mida’s sword to my left and dagger in right leg bands, life sign swinging gently between my breasts, was accorded a longer inspection. This inspection too, however, was also relatively brief, and then Sigurr’s Shadow rose and came to greet us with a smile.

“I see you spoke the truth brother,” said he to Mehrayn, his hand touching the smooth, faintly marked skin of my left arm lightly. “She must surely be sent by Sigurr, to be cared for by him so well. Come and sit with me, and partake of our victory feast. ”

His arms about each of us, he conducted us to the seats which awaited us, then turned to the slaves to order that boards be filled for us. When he sat again, with Mehrayn to his left and I to Mehrayn’s left, Chaldrin appeared in the doorway, followed by three black-clad males. The large, broad male wore the white body cloth which was usual with him, and an unmarked cloth about his ribs covering his wound. He moved slowly, more by design than by need, and stopped at last before Aysayn, no expression to be seen upon his face.

“Chaldrin, why did you walk?” demanded Aysayn, rising again from his seat to look closely upon the other male. “Do you seek to open your wound again and end yourself? The six slaves I sent would have carried you here.”

“I am scarcely so frail that I need to be carried,” replied Chaldrin, folding leather-covered wrists across his chest. “And yet, should it be your wish, I will return to the Caverns and allow the slaves to carry me. I would not care to offend Sigurr’s Shadow.”

“I have no doubt that you would do just that,” grinned Aysayn, clapping the male upon the shoulder. “Yet not in fear of offending. Come and seat yourself, brother, and partake of our feast. The release of the others has been seen to?”

“Aye,” said Chaldrin, making for the seat to my left. “All save Treglin, who chooses to remain the while to see to those we leave behind. We have cared for them too long to merely abandon them.”

He crossed to his seat and lowered himself into it, then looked upon me where I sat stretched long in my chair. His eyes briefly examined my left arm, then a faint smile touched his lips.

“Chosen by the gods, indeed,” he murmured, leaning carelessly back in his seat. “Should you find the opportunity and desire, perhaps you would speak a word on my behalf.”

“Certainly,” I murmured in return with a nod, keeping my eyes from him. “Think upon the possible price and your willingness to pay it, and then ask me again. Should your choice be the same, I will gladly speak upon your behalf.”

“Price,” he echoed with a frown, at last hearing the requirement before falling silent. At last it had come to him that the favor of the gods was not without its drawbacks. Slaves came and handed to us boards of provender, and Aysayn turned to Mehrayn.

“Now that you are adequately provisioned, brother,” said Aysayn, “I would appreciate hearing what brought your expedition so quickly back to the city. From what Jalav had told me, you should not have returned till it was far too late to aid us.”

“So would it have gone had Sigurr not intervened,” nodded Mehrayn after tasting of the baked, pressed meat upon his board. I tasted the same, then set it aside in distaste. “We were fully prepared to travel the full distance to the city of our enemies, yet the third fey of our journey saw us face to face with them—for they journeyed to bedevil us. The battle was short and decisive, and few of them remained to lose themselves in the forests. Nearly did I continue on to their city despite all, yet too many of my warriors had been wounded by the numerically superior force we had bested. I waited two feyd to allow my men to regather strength, then led them home.

“Rather than ride directly into the city, I thought to save myself a bit of time and went in search of the place I had directed Jalav to wait. I intended taking her back with me and seeking you out again, yet I found not a single sign of her presence. Again I nearly rode directly into the city, yet vague suspicions upon many odd happenings caused me to send a single rider in instead, to go to my house and fetch forth Hesain, in whose keeping I had left Jalav. The rider returned with word that Hesain had been found emptied of lifeblood, and no further word had been heard of Jalav.”

Mehrayn paused to take a goblet of drink from the slave who offered it to him, and drank deeply under Aysayn’s sober stare. I, too, took a goblet and drank, yet only after assuring myself that the drink was not the thrai I had previously been offered. I discovered it to be nearer to daru than the renth of the northern cities, yet still unbrewed. Brewed daru would have gone down well just then, yet what may one expect when among males?

“It was then necessary to consider what next should be done,” said Mehrayn, putting his goblet aside in favor of a leg of roast lellin. “The rider I had sent had found that ‘Aysayn’ had returned to his apartments, yet had not sent me private Word of his return as he normally did. Also, word had traveled among the warriors, telling of the blasphemer who had attempted to present himself as the Shadow, foolishly thinking the Shadow still absent. It was mentioned how fortunate it was that the lady Ladayna had been there to consult, as the guardsmen approached were new to their posts, having only recently been appointed. Learning that the blasphemer had been sent to the Caverns, I dismissed the idea of taking my warriors to demand an audience with ‘Aysayn,’ and sent instead those who would watch over both the entrance to the Caverns and the gallery. I was considering in what manner I might force action of some sort from the enemy, when a rider returned in haste to inform me that a large number of warriors had appeared in the gallery early this fey, and had put themselves out of sight. Knowing that whatever battle was fought would be fought upon the Sands, I led my warriors to the Caverns. What occurred then, you are already aware of.”

“Indeed,” nodded Aysayn, sipping from his own goblet. “The thing was done with sickening ease, requiring no more than your absence and Ladayna’s assistance. It will not again be so easily done, especially through Ladayna. The time has come to teach her the consequences of spiteful, petty vindictiveness.”

“Perhaps you should not have taken her unwilling to your chambers,” said I, regarding no more than the goblet I held and drank from. “Had you left her to her own devices, she would not have been able to betray you—nor me.”

“Ladayna—unwilling?” scoffed Aysayn, stirring in his seat beyond Mehrayn. “Ladayna was most willing when she came to me, seeing herself with power and station far above any other wench in the city. The station was hers without question, yet power does not belong in hands which will abuse it. She attempted to ignore the restrictions placed upon her, and gave orders which were not hers to give, thereby attempting to usurp my rights and privileges without formally challenging me for the position. For this reason was she placed in silver chains, to remind the warriors about us that her word was not as final as she believed it to be. I now realize it was Pinain urging her to these actions, that he might replace me without having to face me. It was he who changed the guard before my apartments, intending to snare me upon my return. Had Ladayna not been so concerned with her anger toward me, she would have seen through Pinain and his urgings.”

“And yet,” said Mehrayn, “this fails to account for her having sent you to the Caverns, brother. Spitefulness does not condemn a man to a place from which there is no return. The emotion behind such an action is more often hatred.”

“Hatred was indeed the reason behind my condemnation,” said Aysayn, pleasure in his tone. “Pinain, not Ladayna, had my warriors take me to the Caverns; Ladayna merely named me impostor, childishly thinking that I would be thrown into the streets as though I were a beggar. After she returned to her apartments, Pinain gave the orders he had intended the entire time. This was told me by the warriors he commanded as my chief guardsman, all save my supposition concerning his thoughts.”

“Then Ladayna was a pawn,” said Mehrayn, his voice containing the same satisfaction which Aysayn had shown. “Her betrayal was no betrayal at all, merely foolishness.”

“Foolishness which nearly took my life, and her own as well,” said Aysayn with a good deal less pleasure. “I will be a long time punishing her for that foolishness, Sigurr take me if I do not.”

“An excellent beginning,” laughed Mehrayn, adding his amusement to that of the other males within the chamber. I moved my gaze from the goblet I held, and immediately saw that Ladayna had entered the chamber with a black-clad male as escort, yet was she considerably altered from the Ladayna I had last seen. Gone was the long, black covering she had worn, replaced by the red half-covering of a slave female. Too, the tips of her breasts had been dyed the red of a slave, and no longer was she draped in silver chain. No chain whatsoever restricted her movements, yet was she constrained by the trappings of a slave and the hand of a guard male upon her arm, which hurried her forward despite her deep consternation. Directly to Aysayn was she taken, and put to her knees before him.

“Have you completed your tasks already, wench?” he asked with visible approval, smiling down upon the female. “As you work so assiduously to please me, I shall now allow you to join the feast.”

“Oh, do not force me to remain here!” begged the female from where she knelt, mortified by the laughter and amusement about her. “Have I not been punished enough? Aysayn, I am in agony!”

“Agony of the soul is no more than that which you have earned,” said the male in a low voice, his hand beneath her upturned face. “You will learn to think and behave as an adult rather than as an overindulged child, else shall I release you to go elsewhere, likely as a slave. My patience with you is now exhausted. You will remain here at the feast, and will serve my guests and myself if your services are required.”

“Aysayn, you must recall your promise!” whispered the female urgently, reaching up to grasp with both hands the wrist above the hand at her face. “By cause of your other punishment, I am desperately in need of easing! You promised to see to me when my tasks were done! You promised!”

“Wench, I spoke of the possibility of seeing to you when your behavior was to my satisfaction,” he corrected, holding her anxious gaze with the steadiness of his own. “No promise was given you, for no promise need be given a slave. Should I find myself displeased, the time will be longer yet—which is all too likely to occur. How have you been addressing your master?”

The female’s gaze widened at the words spoken to her, and her full lower lip trembled. A long moment passed during which she seemed unable to look away from Aysayn, and then, at last, she ventured, “Master?”

“Excellent,” smiled Aysayn, releasing her face and leaning back in his seat. “Now let us see if there will be any services requiring your performance. Should there be any, I shall expect to feel satisfaction over that performance.”

“Perhaps there is one already awaiting her,” said Mehrayn, looking down upon the female as Aysayn had done. “Jalav was considerably inconvenienced by cause of her actions; does she not owe an apology over the matter?”

“Indeed brother, indeed she does,” agreed Aysayn with a grin as Ladayna shook her head pleadingly, stricken. “We must see to the omission immediately.”

“I was not inconvenienced,” I interrupted their amusement, swallowing the last of my drink before turning to my right to look upon them. “I was offered deadly insult, the sort which may only be wiped away with blood. Is it this wrong which you seek to redress?”

The two males quickly lost their laughter, stirring in discomfort in the same manner that Chaldrin stirred in his seat at my back.

“Should you count insult, wench,” said Chaldrin, “Aysayn and I are equally guilty of such actions. Do you mean to hold us accountable as well?”

“You two and this one beside me,” I said, nodding toward an expressionless Mehrayn. I then rose to my feet, pushed my eating board at a nearby trembling slave, then turned to face the three males with goblet in left hand. “Which of you will be first to face me?”

Aysayn and Chaldrin exchanged a glance the while Mehrayn studied his eating board. Another moment of silence ensued, one which spread throughout the entire chamber, and then Aysayn made a sound in his throat.

“Come, wench; surely you know we may none of us face you,” said he, great discomfort upon him. “Mehrayn and I, loyal followers of Sigurr, would be committing sacrilege if we were to draw weapon against his proven messenger. Chaldrin, believing as he does that Sigurr has turned from him, nevertheless also knows you as chosen by the gods. Even were he in full health, he would not again draw against you. Should you wish to end us all where we sit, you may do so; it is otherwise pointless to pursue the matter.”

“Indeed is it pointless,” I agreed, looking upon all of them and seeing their surprise. It was not known to them that all blood debts had recently been consigned to oblivion by another, one they were unacquainted with. “It is as pointless as offering apology for a blood insult. Had I considered the matter one to be pursued, apology would not have sufficed. Should it be your wish to continue tormenting this slave female, involve another in your foolishness. Jalav has matters of greater import to concern her.”

Now was it embarrassment which touched the males, turning their skin ruddy and their eyes from my gaze. I reached my goblet to my lips and attempted to drink, only then recalling that I had drained the thing a moment earlier. I looked upon the empty vessel with annoyance, and suddenly the female Ladayna was before me.

“Allow this slave to refill your goblet, mistress,” said she, her voice as quiet as her gaze was steady. “I offer no apology for doing that which was beyond forgiveness; I merely thank you for my life, and for considering a poor slave who has lost all right to dignity. Never will I forget what was taught me when you slew Pinain.”

“And what was that, wench?” asked Aysayn when I made no reply to her words. The female smiled faintly, then took my goblet before turning again to the male.

“I have learned that there are those about who do not, after all, consider me too beautiful and desirable to be called to account for that which I do,” said she, looking upon the male. “You are stern with me now, Aysayn, yet you have been stern with me before for no great length of time. I have learned that your leniency is caused by your love for me, yet I have also learned that there are those who feel naught of that love—and who would do me great harm in your place. Should you consent, later, to hold me in your arms, I will allow myself to feel the terrible fear such a realization brings. For now, a slave has been given a task to perform.”

The female put her head down and hurried away with my goblet, and Aysayn turned to stare after her before slowly turning forward again. The male seemed touched by that which the female had said, as touched as every fool of a male within hearing. Ladayna had professed herself slave, yet she, in her own way, was no more slave than I. Had I had my preference in the matter, I would have preferred that her well-announced lessons had been in sword skill. I returned to my seat and sat again, hearing the return of conversation in the chamber.

“These matters of greater concern—” said Mehrayn to me, turning in his seat to reach a hand out to my hand—“they cannot be concerned with your mission, for our Sigurri will be prepared to return with you to Bellinard within a hand of feyd. The ceremonies must be gone through with Aysayn presiding, yet they are mere formalities. Do you chafe at the added delay?”

“I do not face your delay.” I shrugged, slipping my hand away from his. “I depart with the new light, yet not for Bellinard.”

“Not for Bellinard?” echoed Mehrayn with a frown, Aysayn and Chaldrin also suddenly attentive. Ladayna returned with my goblet, now refilled, and I took it without giving attention to the female. I had expected some indication of annoyance from her at the brusque dismissal, yet she, too, was aware of the attention of the males, and merely withdrew to kneel again at Aysayn’s feet.

“For what reason will you not return to Bellinard?” asked Aysayn, leaning forward past Mehrayn even as he put a hand to Ladayna’s hair. “Have you not been awaiting the completion of your mission so that you might rejoin the others of your wenches? What has occurred that has caused you to change this intention?”

“The decision was not mine,” I shrugged, swallowing from the near-daru. “While I slept, Mida walked my dreams as she has done many times in the past. She has reminded me of a boast and a lack, and commanded that I fulfill the first by mending the second.”

“Jalav, you must speak more plainly,” said Mehrayn, his light eyes concerned. “For what reason must you leave so soon, and where do you go?”

“I go to claim the war leadership of the enemy clans of Midanna,” I informed him, faintly saddened that I no longer felt desire when I looked upon the broad strength of him. “Many times I have named myself war leader of all the Midanna, yet this is not so. Fully half of our clans fail to follow me—as they must if we are to find victory over the strangers.”

“But—they are your enemies!” protested Mehrayn, deeper concern growing with him. “You cannot merely ride into their midst and announce your intentions! They will have your life! I will accompany you, and my warriors as well.”

“They are Midanna,” I denied with a headshake. “Were I so foolish as to allow you to accompany me, they would have other than your life from you—taken willingly or elsewise. You will remain here, Mehrayn, and see to your males the while I see to my own tasks. Mida willing, we shall meet again at Bellinard.”

“Should he decide to remain, I shall not,” came Chaldrin’s calm rumble as Mehrayn’s broad face set in lines of stubbornness. “I cannot aid you if I am not beside you.”

“It is not possible for a male to aid me among the Midanna,” I insisted, turning to Chaldrin to see that he wore the same expression that Mehrayn did. “Do you wish to be used more harshly than a female slave in the Caverns? Do you wish to place me in greater jeopardy than I would find alone? The penalty for leading free males to Midanna home tents is harsh; I would not care to add that to the enmity which will already be awaiting me.”

All three males began speaking at once, then, in argument rather than in disappointed agreement. The males saw only that which they, themselves, wished, and I raised my goblet to my lips and drained it quickly. Had I been wise, I would not have spoken of my intentions, yet the time was well past to consider the point. I must instead consider the best way to avoid the well-intentioned concern of those about me, and be about this further task given me by Mida. I had seen to the raising of the Sigurri; how much more difficult the raising of enemy sisters would be was best not contemplated till face to face with it. Face to face alone, without the presence of males!