Edmund Bertram's Diary

DECEMBER

Monday 20 December

It is good to be home. I was met by kindness from Mama, enquiries about my health from Mrs. Norris, judicious interest from Papa, squeals from Maria and Julia, a shamefaced anxiety from Tom — which, however, evaporated when it became clear that I did not mean to mention any of his university exploits — and unabashed happiness from Fanny. The way her face lit up when she saw me lifted my spirits, and it was not long before we were outside.

‘Are you sure you are warm enough?’ I asked her, for the air was cold even though the sun was shining.

‘Yes,’ she said.

‘Let me look at you to be sure.’

I cast my eyes over her cloak, which she wore over her pelisse, and saw that her bonnet was pulled down over her ears, and that her hands were gloved as well as being hidden in her muff.

‘Yes, I think you are.’

As we began our walk I asked her what she had been reading. She had read the Goldsmith I recommended, and we were soon so engrossed in the conversation that we lost track of the time, being taken by surprise when we discovered that dusk was falling. We returned to the house. Just before we went in I took the opportunity of quizzing her on the constellations, which were beginning to appear in the sky, and I found she had memorized all that we could see.

We went inside and I returned to my room to find Tom lolling there, bored. He sat and talked whilst I dressed for dinner and then we went downstairs. After dinner I called Fanny to me, for I saw my aunt’s eyes on her and suspected Fanny would soon be sent on an errand through the cold corridors if I did not keep her by my side. She repaid me by telling me all about the letter she had had from her family, and regaling me with stories about Susan and William.

Tuesday 21 December

Tom thanked me for not mentioning his conduct to Papa. I told him I would never betray him, and said how glad I was to see him looking better for being at home. He told me it was just high spirits that made him wild at Oxford, and I should join him in his pleasures.

‘There will be time enough to be sober when you are older,’ he told me.

‘After seeing you lying face down in the quad, I would rather be sober now,’ I said. I think that is why I have never succumbed to the worst temptations university life has to offer. Tom has always been there before me, and shown me the evil of excess by his example. If he could only see himself when he is drunk I am sure he would be as disgusted with it as I am. He looked annoyed, but his face soon cleared and he challenged me to a race over to Hampton’s Cross. I accepted the challenge, and I would have beaten him if my horse had not thrown a shoe. He laughed at me when I said as much, saying he had been letting me edge into the lead to humour me, and that he would have overtaken me before we reached the cross. We were still arguing the point when we returned to the house. We had hearty appetites and begged some food from Mrs. Hannah in the kitchen, knowing it was still some hours until dinner. She gave us a hunk of roast beef and a loaf to share between us, and we ate it hungrily before returning to our rooms.

After dinner we had an impromptu ball and Tom taught us all a new dance. He could not remember half the steps, but the girls enjoyed it. Aunt Norris said she had never seen finer dancing, remarking that Maria would have many admirers when she came out. Julia went into a pet, and Tom teased her out of it, saying she would no doubt marry a prince, and we ended the evening very merrily.