Yes, those words had actually left her mouth.
Yes, her parents would personally drag her home and lock her within her bedchamber if they knew, tossing the key in the rubbish bin. And, yes, they were shockingly forward, even for her.
But she didn’t regret them.
They were true, after all. And hadn’t he just said that he always told the truth? Well, so could she.
And the truth was, she felt alive when she was with him—exuberant in a way no other man of the ton had made her feel. Not self-conscious, not hunted for her dowry, not seen as the daughter of a peer—just Beatrice, lover of art and slightly awful dancer.
She pressed her lips together in a shy smile before brushing past him and up the stairs leading to the rooms above. Her half boots clicked hollowly against the aged wood steps, and the air smelled of disuse. She paused at the small landing and waited for the others to catch up. Rose was right behind her, her dark eyes wide with worry. “I don’t know as we should be here, my lady.”
“Nonsense, Rose. Would you rather be in the rain?”
“No, my lady, but—”
“And it’s not as though visiting an artist’s studio is inappropriate. I’ve visited Monsieur Allard perhaps a dozen times.”
Her maid bit her lip uneasily, but nodded. “I suppose so. Still—”
“There’s nothing to worry about. I promise.”
“Is everything all right?” Colin asked as he mounted the last step.
Beatrice smiled, determined not to let anything get in the way of this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. “Right as rain.” She ignored Rose’s frown—she’d be happy once she had a quiet place to sit and her book in her hands. The maid’s love of reading made for easy bribing, and Beatrice had presented her with a brand-new copy of Rob Roy this morning.
He hesitated for a moment, then nodded and reached for the tarnished brass knob before them. The door swung open on rusty hinges, and as the room was revealed to her, Beatrice gasped, her hand going to her heart.
“Oh, my, it’s gorgeous.” She turned to face him, shaking her head in wonder. “I can’t believe this was only minutes from my home all this time!”
He smiled and spread his arm out, inviting her to go inside. She stepped through the threshold, hardly able to take it all in. The faint smell of mineral spirits clung to the space like a memory, despite the dankness.
Behind her, Colin directed Rose to a small parlor off the main room, where a single sofa was stationed in front of the back windows, facing out on the alley behind them.
Beatrice hardly paid them more than a passing glance. Her gaze—her whole heart, really—was riveted on the wide-open studio that encompassed the entire front half of the floor. The centerpiece of the room was a huge, arching Venetian window that took up nearly half the front wall. It had seemed unimpressive from the street, but from where Beatrice stood, it was spectacular. The bottom of the window rested mere inches from the broad-planked floor, and it spanned in a great arc from one side of the room to the other, almost touching the ceiling at its center.
With the miserable day outside, the space was still nicely lit, but she could just imagine the place flooded with light on a sunny day. Several easels stood empty around the room, their spindly legs coated in a rainbow of paint drippings. Various brushes, scrapers, palettes, and rags were stored on racks and tables throughout the space. Mixing cups sat by a paint-splattered sink, and a utilitarian pitcher showed the frequent touches of a paint-covered hand.
Something magical shimmied through her, raising gooseflesh on her arms. These were the tools of Sir Frederick’s masterpieces. Which works had rested in this very room, painted by these brushes, supported by these easels, and lit by these windows? She walked through the space, reverently, imagining half-finished canvases lining the plaster walls.
She turned to Colin, who leaned against the doorway watching her, his dark greatcoat still pulled tight around him to ward off the chill of the unheated room. “What happened to the unfinished portraits?”
He gave a one-shouldered shrug, then pushed away from the wall to join her in the center of the mostly empty space. “We dinna find any.”
She blinked. “None?”
Shaking his head, he said, “Not a one. My sister was certain he was working on something in his studio in Scotland, but there was nothing there, either.”
“How odd,” she murmured, glancing around once more. She had half a dozen unfinished paintings in her own studio at any one time. She rarely concentrated solely on one until it was finished, instead preferring to work on the piece that most moved her. And then there were the ones that just didn’t feel right, which she set aside indefinitely.
Sadness crept into her euphoria. The world would never again have a Tate masterpiece. She had just assumed there would be some unseen pieces somewhere, languishing in various stages of completion.
“My father was odd.” The words weren’t spoken with animosity, but quiet truth.
“Was he? Not terribly surprising, I suppose. Genius often is.” If she had to choose between being average and normal or being brilliant and odd, she’d go with brilliant any day of the week. “I wish I could have seen him at work. Actually,” she said, trailing a finger down the side of one of the easels, “Father had written to him to engage his services more than a year ago, but Sir Frederick declared that he was much too busy and that it might be years before he would be available to us.”
“Really?” His eyebrows rose in surprise. He pressed his lips together, not quite in displeasure, but something close. She looked away, realizing that such a mention might be painful for him. Who could have known his father’s life was measured in months at the time, not years? “Well, I wish I could see you work.”
Her gaze snapped back to his. His voice was low and sweet, his eyes unclouded. Thank goodness—she hadn’t ruined the mood after all. “You’re teasing me,” she half asked, half accused.
“Never.” He broke out in a half smile and gave a small shrug. “All right, sometimes, but certainly not now. Anyone who displays such passion when speaking of art must be equally as passionate in the execution.”
“Oh, I am. But I assure you, it’s not pretty. I don’t remember to smile, or have proper posture, or even to have my mouth closed.” She cringed a bit—that did not come out the way she’d intended. He was probably picturing her as some sort of trained sloth with a paintbrush.
“And how do you know that’s not pretty? I think many men would appreciate a woman at her most natural. Certainly any Scot would,” he said with a devilish wink.
“You say that, but when it comes down to it, I’m not so sure. Why else would only the prettiest of countenance and manners be called Incomparables and diamonds of the first water? Those with large dowries are also sought, but it is the ones possessing beauty and comportment that gentlemen really want.”
“Such an expert on the wants of men, especially for one still in her debut year.” He walked toward her, tilting his head as he sized her up. He’d taken off his hat, and his damp hair rebelled against his normally neat style. It swept across his forehead like a raven’s wing, stark against his pale skin. She loved the contrast, loved the way it made his eyes seem almost pewter while the pale pink of his lips stood out.
She swallowed as he stepped closer and closer, stalking her just as he had the night they’d met in his aunt’s gallery. “I’m very perceptive. And one needn’t be out long to see how things are in our set.”
“Well, I think we need to put your perceptiveness to the test,” he said, giving her a subtle wink as he brushed by her close enough for her to catch a hint of his clean, masculine scent. She turned like a sunflower tracking the sun, suddenly a little light-headed.
“You do?”
He grabbed one of the blank canvases stacked against the wall and lifted it to his chest. “I do.” He returned to where she stood and set the canvas on the easel closest to the window. “Now, would you be wanting to paint with my father’s brushes or your own?”
Sir Frederick’s brushes? A thrill raced from her heart straight to her toes and back. “Oh my goodness. I couldn’t possibly.” But even as she said it, her fingers curled at her sides, anxious to hold them in her hand.
“Of course you can. What good are they doing, cluttering up the place? Might as well give them a go before the lease runs out and we sell the lot of them.”
She gasped. “You can’t just sell his brushes! They were likely as much a part of him as his own hands.”
“Then give them life again.” He said it so simply, as if it were no more an issue than choosing what gloves to wear or what to have for breakfast.
It was entirely too much temptation for her to resist, especially when he was so matter-of-fact about them. “Are you absolutely certain?”
“Utterly.”
A shiver of excitement raced down her spine, and she couldn’t help the huge smile that came to her lips. “All right then. What shall I paint?”
“Whatever you want. Since you doona like straight lines, I’m not sure what might inspire you. Shall I put together a still life?”
A bit of the giddiness spilled over, obscuring her need for propriety. “Yes,” she said, crossing her arms as she eyed him. “You. Now stand still.”
He laughed. “You canna be serious. Why don’t you choose something interesting?”
She pursed her lips as she inspected him—in the name of art, of course. His angular cheekbones, the authoritative brow, those expressive lips—all of it begged to be captured on canvas. Actually, it begged to be captured in sculpture, but that was entirely beyond her skills.
“I am serious. Your features are strong and unusual. I think they would be a challenge to get just right on canvas.” The night of their first meeting came to mind, making her smile. “Though I don’t believe I’d be the first to try. That was you in the painting in your aunt’s gallery, wasn’t it? The young boy with the defiant eyes?”
His expression shifted, as if the mists of nostalgia softened his gaze and gentled the sharpness of his features. “You really are perceptive. I was five. It was shortly after my mother’s death, and my father thought it would be a nice gesture for Aunt Constance.”
“Well, I’m very glad he did it. Now I feel as though I’ve seen a bit of you as a boy. He captured your spirit quite well, I think.”
He nodded absently, his gaze flitting around to the supplies situated near the easel. Pulling off his gloves, he stuffed them into the pockets of his greatcoat. Her gaze went immediately to his bare hands, which seemed strong and capable, especially for a barrister. Must be the wild Scot in his blood.
“Well, then,” he said, selecting a brush from a tin cup beside the easel, “let us see if you can do the same.”
He held it up like a delectable bonbon, the same challenge she’d seen in the boy’s eyes now lighting the man’s. Throwing down the gauntlet, was he? She pressed her lips together, eyeing the brush as if it were the apple in Eden. Taking a breath, she removed her own gloves and reached for the prize.
The moment her fingers touched the smooth wood of the handle, his hand settled over hers, holding it in place. Fire swept up her arm, down her back, and straight through her belly at the touch of his skin against hers.
Her gaze flew up to meet his, but she couldn’t have said a word if her life depended on it. His eyes darkened, from flint to coal, just enough for her to know without a doubt that he had felt it, too. He swallowed, but he didn’t release his hold.
“First,” he said, his voice quiet in the thickness of the moment, “you must solemnly promise that you will ignore my father’s techniques and paint me using only your own style.”
His hand still held hers, making it impossible to think. His fingers were warmer than they should have been, his skin softer, his grip firmer. Wetting her lips, she nodded, two shallow bobs of her head agreeing to whatever he wanted in the world just then.
He released her, surrendering his hold on the brush, her hand, and her wits all at once. She drew a steadying breath, trying to calm her thundering pulse. Had anyone’s touch ever affected her like that? Surely not. Though really, how many men had she touched skin to skin like that? None, unless one counted her family members. Richard and Great-uncle Percival hardly counted when compared to the likes of Colin.
“Well, then,” she said, rallying her wits, “I should start with a drawing first, then move to paints when the pose is just right.” Unwilling to part with her prize, she tucked the slender brush behind her ear, just as she sometimes did with pencils when she was distracted.
“All right, then. How would you like me to pose?”
Lord have mercy, what a question. Beatrice bit the inside of her lip, trying to push past the completely inappropriate image of him leaning against the curving window casing, his hair tousled, thanks to the rain, and his shirt tossed over the chair beside him.
Papa would probably send her to a convent if he knew the sort of thoughts racing through Beatrice’s head just then. But she was an artist, was she not? She had observed and studied many a male form, in much, if not all, of its glory. She knew what positions put a person at his best advantage, and with Colin’s surprisingly fit form, she just knew the play of light over both his angular face and well-proportioned upper body would be divine.
She also knew she could never bring herself to actually do such a thing.
She might be brave, but she wasn’t reckless. Well, sometimes she was, but she certainly had never asked a man to take off his shirt, and she wasn’t about to start now—especially with her maid in the next room and no closed doors between them. That didn’t stop the torrent of butterflies from whirling within her belly at the very thought.
Still, the pose was a good idea, even if the bare chest wasn’t. “I think perhaps you should be leaning against the window, looking out at the rooftops beyond.”
He lifted a dark brow, amusement clearing the lingering darkness from his eyes. “Are we going for ‘gazing longingly in the distance,’ then? Because I have a fantastic pining expression.”
Stepping to the window, he draped himself across it like a lovesick maiden and gazed out, his eyebrows lifted and knitted as though hope itself resided in the rooftops beyond the glass.
She smacked his shoulder lightly. “Oh stop. You shouldn’t tease me.”
He dropped his ridiculous expression and chuckled. “Yes, I know. I never tease anyone, actually. I doona know why I canna seem to stop myself when you’re near.”
What a thing to say. It didn’t sound like a compliment, but it certainly felt like one. “Perhaps that means I put you at ease.”
“Perhaps. Or perhaps I’ve let myself become too familiar around you. It’s a social sin that I should feel much more concerned about than I am.” His expression bordered on boyish, especially with his tousled hair. Lord but she loved the rumpled version of the man. He was always so proper, she felt as though she were seeing him in a way few ever did.
“Hold that.”
His brows dipped together as he blinked in confusion. “Hold what?”
“That,” she said, waving her hands around to encompass his position. “Your pose, your expression, whatever you were thinking about just then.”
He went stiff, doing exactly as she said. She rolled her eyes. “No, don’t go rigid. Just relax. Breathe. Be still, not frozen.”
He loosened up a bit, and she smiled. “Yes, that’s better. Give me a moment. I’ll be right back.”
She scurried around the room, rooting out a wide notebook with blank pages and a pencil. She dragged a tall stool over to a spot just in front of him and sat down. “All right. Now, turn your head a bit to the right and look out as if there is something interesting right outside the window.”
“That’s requiring quite a bit of imagination from a barrister in training.”
She widened her eyes meaningfully at him, and he sighed and obeyed. “Excellent. Now tip your head down a bit . . . a little more. That’s good. Now relax your left arm and lean a bit onto the casing. There—perfect.” The daylight illuminated half his face, sending the other half into soft shadow. It made the scale of grays and whites that much more dramatic, highlighting all the angles and planes that she loved so well.
She set to work on the drawing, sketching in his general outline, the shape of the window, and the lines of his limbs. It was quick work, and she glanced up repeatedly as she went about it. After only a few minutes, she looked up to find him watching her. “Colin,” she admonished, pointing her pencil at him, “look outside.”
“Sorry,” he murmured, not appearing the least bit chastised. He averted his gaze to the window again, and she went back to work.
Less than a minute later, she glanced up and found herself caught in his gaze once more. “Ahem,” she prompted.
“Such a taskmaster,” he teased, shaking his head, “especially when the view inside is vastly preferable to anything outside.”
She bit her upper lip, fighting against the pleased smile that threatened to encourage him. “Now you sound like my brother. Richard is forever saying things like that.”
That won her exactly what she had intended. With a mild scowl—who wants to be compared to a woman’s brother, after all—he turned to look back outside.
“Now the angle is all wrong. Chin down, please. No, more to the right. No, that’s not quite right either. Just a moment,” she said, standing up and setting her notebook on the stool.
Stepping up to him, she reached out to adjust his angle, but realized all at once that her hands were gloveless and he was no family member to be casually arranged to her liking. She froze, her hand only inches away from his chin. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t—”
She started to drop her hand, but he smiled and caught her by the elbow. “No, it’s fine. My father did this a thousand times. Consider me your still life, to be adjusted at will.”
She drew a slow breath, trying not to betray her wildly pounding heart. This was art, after all. Arranging one’s subject was to be expected. When she nodded, he released his gentle hold and lifted his head, inviting her to do with him what she would.
Wetting her suddenly dry lips, she slipped her hand beneath his chin, touching the surprisingly smooth skin stretched across his angular jaw. He watched her, his eyes tracking hers even as she tilted his chin in just the right angle. He responded to the lightest of touches, moving easily with her direction.
“There,” she breathed, not quite able to find her voice. “I think that’s good.”
“Are you certain?”
Beatrice nodded, the movement slightly jerky under the weight of his gaze. She should step back, she knew she should, but something in his smoky eyes held her rooted in place, her skirts brushing his legs. With the way he leaned against the casing, the difference in their heights wasn’t as great as it might have been, making him seem all the more accessible.
“You wouldn’a rather have my chin tilted down a bit more?” He lowered his head, pressing his jaw more firmly into her hand and closing the distance between him and her upturned face.
Her pulse thundered in her ears, drowning out reason and thought, narrowing her world to the warmth of his skin against her fingers and the incredibly intoxicating scent of his breath as it caressed her cheek. When she didn’t move, he reached up and slid his fingers over hers, flattening her palm against the curve of his jaw.
His eyes never left hers, and she watched as they darkened and his pupils widened, drawing her toward him without even moving a muscle. She swayed forward, drawn by his heat, and his scent, and the intensity of his gaze. Even as he bent toward her, she lifted her face to him, seeking, eager, driven by a need she never knew she possessed.
And then his lips touched hers.