Hour of the Lion

Chapter Twenty-eight

Her paws took her south, and the rest of her agreed with the destination. She wasn’t sure exactly how long she’d been in the forest now. The first week or so seemed a blur. Every time she’d change back to human, all the pain would return, and she’d simply kneel and cry like some abandoned baby.

But her grief had slowly eased, and now she’d shift to human during the day, sit in the sun, and think. Over the days, she worked through her choices.

She had a real tactical problem-how to keep the Daonain from killing her-that couldn’t be solved until she answered the tougher question: Go back or not?

Oh, tough decision. She was a damned brave soldier. Yeah, shoot her to pieces, even kill her? No problem. Walk into a firefight? You bet.

But risk her heart? Fuck that. Talk about a scaredy-cat. Like a real coward, she hadn’t even waited for the battle to start. Hell, she had run at the first artillery fire. But soldiers had been known to desert the field of battle, and then manage to get control of themselves. To courageously return to the fight.

Could she?

The safest choice was to stay away. Live as an outlaw in the forests, or stay in the human world and hide her animal half. She could manage. Wells would help, even move her to a far-away country if needed. She’d lived undercover for years. Nothing new.

Or she could return. So, so much scarier. The physical risk: she could die, and -even worse-Alec or Calum might be the ones who killed her. Yeah, ugly outcome. But death was nothing new.

What really scared her spitless was the thought of fighting for the life-the love-she wanted. Of opening herself up to being hurt emotionally. Because-she took a hard breath-those two men could hurt her worse than even dying.

If it had been someone besides Calum and Alec in that restaurant, would she have run when Wells made her look like a traitor? Hell no.

If it hadn’t been her lovers treating her like the bad guy in the farmhouse, would she have given up so easily? Or would she have told Wells to leave and stayed to battle it out?

With anyone else, she’d beat the crap out of them if they judged her without giving her a chance to speak. No matter how fucking overwhelming the evidence was. But because it was Alec and Calum, she’d caved, making herself look all the more guilty.

Why?

Because she didn’t believe she deserved their love. Or the life they wanted to give her. Her stupid little subconscious had decided that no one could really love her enough to listen and work things out. After all, they must know how unworthy she was, how damaged.

Her subconscious needed to get its ass kicked.

But it had taken a while to see the idiocy of her behavior and then to admit that Alec and Calum really did love her. She hadn’t put on an act. They knew her well. Maybe not her whole background, but definitely her personality, flaws and all. They loved all of her as she did them.

And she wanted them-everything-back again.

So she’d headed south. Best case scenario: they’d let her explain. They’d understand-and maybe even apologize for jumping to conclusions-and take her home. She’d love them and Jamie and…her chest went tight…and someday, might perhaps have a baby with them. Or a litter.

Worst case: she’d die.

She’d come up with a plan: walk her ass into the center of Cold Creek, create a scene-considering she’d lack any clothing, that shouldn’t be difficult-and demand to talk with Calum and Alec. They couldn’t kill a naked woman in front of the town, not when a whole bunch of the spectators would be human.

And she’d stand there and-quietly-tell them everything. What she had and hadn’t done, how she hadn’t known what to do, about how Wells had given his word and that she’d kill him personally if he broke it. Not that he ever would, but they couldn’t know that. She’d promise to give them a ka-zillion babies if that’s what they wanted. She’d beg forgiveness.

If they were fair-since they were men, fair wasn’t a foregone conclusion-they’d acknowledge making a few mistakes themselves. She growled as she loped through the forest. Yeah, they could have given her a chance to explain, and worked with her on the Wells problem. But nooo, just had to jump to conclusions. Sure, she’d punched their paranoid hide-from-the-government hot button, but still.

So walk right into the firing zone, make herself a target, and hope for the best. One major invitation-to-disaster plan. But hey, even Wells might have trouble figuring a way out of this mess.

She leaped over a fallen log, scented a rabbit and paused, then continued. She was getting closer, she knew it. Sometime last night, a feeling had arisen in her, a sensation of being home, as if she’d been cold and someone wrapped a warm blanket around her. Each touch of her paws to the earth repeated that. Home, home, home.

This shifter shit is sure weird.

She lifted her muzzle, checked the scent of the early morning air. It even smelled like the right mountains, and the thought made her lope forward, her pace increasing and-

Snap! Pain. Horrible pain. She snarled, spun, fell. Son-of-a-bitch. A trap.

Her hind leg was caught in a heavy iron trap. She trawsfurred, then grunted as the metal teeth dug deeper into more tender human flesh. Fucking-A, that hurt. Mouth tight, she examined the trap. The sucker was huge, made of heavy steel. And those teeth were a real pisser. The bleeding wasn’t too good either.

After managing to stand, she pushed down on the jaws with all her strength. Not enough weight. She tried again and again, and then slid back down to the ground. She couldn’t open the damn thing. And nothing lay within reach to use to pry the teeth apart.

Could she yank it loose and carry it with her?

A few minutes later, she gave that one up. The hunter had pounded the anchor stakes so far into the frozen ground, they didn’t budge at all.

Shifting back into cat form, she lay down and watched her blood turn the snow red. Dammit, in her few-and-far-between prayers, she had specifically requested a go-out-in-a-blaze-of-glory death.

This was so not it.

Hours later, Vic’s ears swiveled toward the southwest. Something was approaching. With the wind blowing the wrong way, she couldn’t catch its scent. Unfortunately, that meant it could smell her, blood and all.

Man or beast or shifter? An edge of fear prickled up her spine. It sounded like more than one animal. A pack of wolves? How delightful.

Dammit, weren’t predators supposed to hunt only at night? Hadn’t these animals read the rule book? The fur on her neck rose as she stood and balanced on three legs, trying not to growl as the trap pulled on her mangled leg. Fuck, if she tried to fight, she’d probably fall down.

Well, at least she was saved the embarrassment of walking into Cold Creek in her birthday suit… But she wouldn’t ever get to see Alec and Calum again. And Jamie. And Thorson. And-

Just out of sight, a heavy animal moved through the underbrush. No, two animals.

The mountain lions burst into the clearing. The sunlight glinted on dark golden fur. And pale golden fur. She recognized them and snarled hopelessly. She was dead. She wouldn’t even have a chance to explain, dammit-

With a resigned breath, she stood her ground. Going belly-up and begging? Not gonna happen. Anger at the unfairness of it all-at them-twined with her love and joy at seeing them one last time, and her cat instincts couldn’t decide what to do.

Calum sprang first, straight for her. He landed barely out of reach. She raised a forepaw, showed her claws, and knew she wouldn’t hurt him.

He stalked forward, ignoring her show of fight, and rubbed his muzzle over hers, purring loudly enough to make the trees shake. His giant paw landed on her shoulders, flattening her like a pancake, and he licked her ear, still purring.

Then Alec shouldered Calum to one side to do the same. Their scent engulfed her, mingled with hers.

They did know who she was, didn’t they? The lifemate who’d betrayed them? But oh, she’d missed them. The higher rumble in the air was her own purring.

Calum shifted to human form. Kneeling beside her, he examined the trap and her leg. He glanced at Alec who loped away, returning with a large branch in his big jaws. He dropped it and shifted.

They had her leg free in minutes. Maybe the iron teeth hurt less coming out than in, but it still fucking hurt.

Calum frowned down at her. With one hand, he grasped her muzzle, forcing her to meet his very intent, very black gaze. “Trawsfur,” he murmured. His power blazed through her, and a second later, she lay naked before him.

Alec wrapped his hands around her leg, putting pressure on it to stop the bleeding.

“Freeing someone from a trap before executing her is a little inefficient, don’t you think?” she muttered, trying to keep her lips from trembling. She was a soldier, dammit; soldiers didn’t burst into tears. She managed to pull in a breath and almost sounded like herself as she asked, “How did you find me? This isn’t exactly on a trail, is it?”

“There’s a bond between a Cosantir and his territory. I know if a strange shifter sets foot in my mountains.” The sun lines around his eyes deepened. “Or when a lost one comes home.”

“Oh.”

He stroked his knuckles across her cheek, and then his flickering smile appeared. “Cariad, did I not warn you and Jamie about these traps?”

Her breath caught. “I’m the enemy. How did I get to be a cariad again?”

Alec released her leg, waited to make sure it had stopped bleeding, then kissed her lips lightly. “Once we got our heads out of our asses, we figured out what had happened and what you must have been trying to do.”

Hope made her eyes sting, reality made her look down. Calum lifted her chin. “Little cat, we doubted you. I doubted you. Can you find forgiveness for us?”

When she shook her head, his jaw tightened, his hand dropped away.

She grabbed his fingers. “No. I mean, I couldn’t believe you’d forgive me.” She sighed. “Not without a lot of arguing. It’s my fault, I know. I-I didn’t tell you all the truth.” The next admission came slower. Harder. “I should have stuck around to have it out with you, but I…”

“Didn’t think we’d love you enough to listen?” Calum asked gently.

She nodded.

Alec hugged her, his body hot against her cold skin. “We love you, Vixen, even if you’re a tad insecure. Just like you love us, even when we’re paranoid bastards.”

“You do?”

Calum nodded, his eyes gentle. “We love you, cariad, and we need you. Come home to us.”

Home.