“I have happy news,” Meri told Betina that afternoon when they’d finished working for the day.
Betina glanced out the kitchen window to where the rest of the team had walked down to the water. “You’re giving up your ridiculous quest to sleep with Jack?”
“Never that,” Meri told her. “I’m actually getting closer by the day. He’s weak with desire. I’m sure you’ve noticed him limping.”
“You’re a nut.”
“Maybe, but I’m a nut with fabulous news about Colin. He likes you.”
Betina had traveled the world, dated a European prince and had a very wealthy sheik invite her into his harem. She had a tattoo, knew how to do henna and had explained the intricacies of sex to Meri in such detail that her first time had been a breeze. But she’d never once, in all the years Meri had known her, blushed.
Betina ducked her head. “I don’t think so.”
“He does. He talked to Jack about you. He thinks you’re great. He’s just lacking in confidence. But you have enough confidence for two people, so you’re a perfect match.”
Betina raised her head. “You dragged Jack into this?”
“I didn’t drag him. He wanted to help. Sort of. That’s so not the point. Isn’t this fabulous? Aren’t you happy?”
Betina didn’t look the least bit thrilled. Her friend walked over to the kitchen table and sat down. “I’m not sure I want things to change.”
Meri sank down across from her. “What? Are you crazy? We’re talking about Colin.”
“Exactly. He’s really special. Right now he’s my friend and I can depend on him to always be my friend. If I change that relationship, there’s no going back.”
“Is that a bad thing?”
“I don’t know and neither do you. Meri, there are consequences for everything we do. What if Colin and I don’t hit it off? What if he’s not who I think he is? Then I’ll lose the friendship and have nothing.”
Meri didn’t understand. “I thought you were in love with him.”
“I am. That’s what makes this so hard. I’d rather just be his friend than not have him in my life at all.”
“But you could be more. You could have it all. I don’t understand. You’ve always been a risk taker.”
“Not when something important is on the line. There I’m nothing but a coward.”
This was news, Meri thought, confused by her friend. “I don’t get it. You’re in love with him. There’s a very good chance that he’s in love with you. And yet you’re not going to do anything about it? You’d rather have a skinny piece of pie than the whole thing?”
“It’s better than no pie.”
“But if you don’t try, you’ll always wonder. You’ll have regrets-and, believe me-those are the worst.”
“How would you know?”
Meri smiled sadly. “I grew up the queen of regrets. There were so many things I wanted to do when I was growing up. But I was always afraid. I didn’t fit in and I wasn’t willing to risk being rejected. So I never tried. I was miserable in college, so sure no one would ever want to be my friend. Looking back, I can see a few times when people approached me. But I blew them off. It was easier to be right than to risk. But it was a high price. Like you said, there are always consequences.”
“What are the consequences of sleeping with Jack?” Betina asked.
“So now we’re talking about me?”
“I have more confidence in the subject.”
Meri considered the question. “I finally get to move on with my life. He was my first crush and then he hurt me. I’ve grown up and matured, but I’ve never been able to let him totally go. He’s always lurking in the back of my mind. If I can get over him, I can move on. He’s the reason I’ve never been able to fall in love.”
“I thought you were in love with Andrew.”
Was she? Meri didn’t know what real, adult love felt like. She enjoyed Andrew’s company. She liked being with him. Six months ago she would have said yes, she was pretty sure she was almost in love with him. Today she was less sure.
“I haven’t missed him enough,” she said softly. “I’ve seen him only a couple of times in the past six months. Shouldn’t I be destroyed without him?”
“Nothing about you is normal. Andrew seems like a good guy. You’ll hook up again when you go back to D.C. You can figure out your feelings then. Assuming you’re not in love with Jack.”
What? “No way. I don’t love him. I want to hurt him. I want to make him crawl and beg and then I want to walk away.”
“That’s sure the story,” Betina said calmly. “The one you’ve been telling yourself for years. But is it the truth?” She shrugged. “I have my doubts. I think you’ve never gotten over Jack. I don’t think any of this is about revenge. You can’t accept you still love him so this is the story you tell yourself. But be careful. You’re not into casual relationships. What happens if you sleep with him and then can’t walk away? You want him to break your heart twice?”
In love with Jack? “Never. He can’t hurt me. I won’t let him. He’s little more than a symbol of the issues in my childhood. Once I prove I’ve outgrown him, I can let my past go.”
“An excellent theory. You’ll have to tell me how that works out for you.”
Meri hated her friend’s doubts. Betina was her oracle, the keeper of social and romantic knowledge. They’d never disagreed on anything significant before.
“I have to do this,” Meri said. “I’ve waited too long to walk away now. I have to go for it. You should, too. Tonight.”
Betina laughed. “You’re a brave woman. Braver than me.”
“That’s not true.”
“It is when it comes to matters of the heart. You’re willing to risk it all to get what you want, and I’m not.”
Jack walked into his room that night weary from too many hours at the computer. He pulled the hem of his shirt out of his jeans and started unbuttoning it, only to stop when he heard something in the bathroom.
He turned and saw the door was closed but light shone from underneath. What the hell?
But as quickly as the question formed, it was answered. There was only one person who would be hanging out in his bathroom. Meri.
He hesitated as he tried to figure out the best way to handle the situation. With his luck, she was probably naked. Maybe in the tub. Waiting for him. She’d been doing her best to seduce him, and he hated to admit that she’d done a damn fine job. He was primed and ready. It wouldn’t take much to push him over the edge.
The question was, did he want to fall?
He owed Hunter his loyalty. He’d given his word and he hadn’t done much of a job of seeing it through. All his friend had asked was for him to protect his sister. Instead Jack had cut and run. Sure, he’d kept tabs on Meri from a distance, but that was taking the easy way out.
Which meant now was the time to make good on his promise. He would walk into the bathroom, tell Meredith to get the hell out of there, explain nothing was ever going to happen between them and grit his teeth for the rest of the time he was stuck up here in the lodge.
A least it was a plan.
He sucked in a breath and walked into the bathroom.
It was as he’d expected. Candles glowing, rose petals scattered, the fire flickering and a very naked Meri in the tub.
She’d piled her hair on top of her head, exposing the sexy line of her neck. Bubbles in the bath floated across the water, giving him a quick view of her nakedness before moving to cover the scene. Her perfect breasts floated, a siren’s lure calling to him.
He was hard in a heartbeat. Hard and ready to take her every way he knew how.
It wasn’t her pale skin or the music playing in the background that got to him. It wasn’t the way she’d set the scene or the fact that he knew she wasn’t just willing, she was determined. He could have resisted all of that, even her slightly pouting lips.
What he couldn’t resist was the book she was reading. She’d set out to seduce him and had gotten so caught up in a textbook on nuclear fission that she hadn’t even heard him walk into the bathroom. That was the very heart of Meri. A walking, breathing genius brain trapped in the body of a centerfold. Who else could possibly appreciate the magic that was her?
Meri sighed as she turned the page. Why did Jerry have to go out of his way to make a perfectly mesmerizing topic boring? She’d been a little nervous when he’d asked her to read his latest textbook, and now that she was into it, she realized she’d been wary for a reason. Nuclear fission was one of the great discoveries of the twentieth century. Shouldn’t that be celebrated? Shouldn’t it at least be interesting? But noooo. Jerry wrote down to his audience and had taken what was-
The book was ripped from her hands. Meri blinked in surprise to find Jack standing beside the tub. Tub? She was in a tub? When had that happened?
She blinked again and her memory returned. Right. She’d planned on seducing him tonight. She glanced around and saw the candles and rose petals. At least she’d done a nice job.
“Hi,” she said as she smiled up at Jack. “Surprise.”
“You sure are that.”
She braced herself for him to yell at her or stalk off or explain for the four hundredth time why this was never going to work. She didn’t expect him to pull her to her feet, drag her out of the bath and haul her against him.
She was stunned. In a good way. She liked how he stared into her eyes as if she were prime rib and he were a starving man. She liked how his hands moved up and down her back, then slipped lower, to her butt.
She was totally naked. A fact he seemed to appreciate.
“But I’m all wet,” she whispered.
“I hope that’s true,” he said before he bent his head and kissed her.
His mouth was firm and sure, claiming her with a kiss that demanded a response. She tilted her head and parted for him, wanting to get the party started with some soul-stirring kisses.
He didn’t disappoint. He moved into her mouth, brushing her tongue with his, moving leisurely, as if arousing her was the only thing on his mind. Heat poured through her.
Not that she was cold. Not with the fire to her back and Jack pressing against her front.
As he kissed her over and over again, he moved his hands over her body. He touched her shoulders, her back, her hips, tracing her skin, igniting nerve endings everywhere he went.
She raised her hands to his shoulders, then slid her fingers through his hair. She touched his cheeks, feeling the stubble there, before exploring his chest.
He was strong and masculine. When he cupped her rear, she arched against him and felt the hard thickness of his erection. A thrill of anticipation shot through her. She shivered.
He pulled back a little. “Cold?”
“No.”
He stared into her eyes. She stared back, wondering what he was thinking. He’d been resisting her best efforts for a while now. Did he regret giving in? Not that she was going to ask. There were some things it was best not to know.
He didn’t act like a man with regrets. He bent down, but instead of kissing her lips, he pressed his mouth to her neck and nibbled his way to her collarbone.
His hands rested lightly on her waist. As he teased her neck, licked her earlobe, then gently bit down, he moved his hands up her rib cage, toward her breasts.
Before her surgery she’d been warned that she might lose some of the sensitivity in her breasts, but she’d been one of the lucky ones. She could feel everything-every touch, every kiss, every whisper of breath. She tensed in anticipation of how Jack would make her tingle.
When he reached her curves, he cupped them gently. He explored her skin, then swept his thumbs across her nipples. Her insides tightened.
He kissed his way down to her breasts and drew her left nipple into his mouth. She leaned her head back as he circled her, then sucked and licked. Ribbons of need wove through her body, settling in her rapidly swelling center. The dull ache of arousal grew.
He turned his attentions to her other nipple, teasing and kissing until her breathing came in pants and her legs began to tremble.
Even as he continued to tease her breasts, he slipped one hand lower and lower, down her belly, toward the promised land. She parted her legs and braced herself for the impact his touch would have on her. Only he didn’t touch her there. Instead he stroked her thighs and played with her curls. He ran his fingers along the outside but never dipped in.
She shifted impatiently, wondering if shaking him would get the message across. There! He needed to touch her there.
But he ignored that place where she was wet and swollen and desperately ready. He squeezed her bottom, he circled her belly button, he touched everywhere else.
Just when she was about to issue a complaint in writing, he pulled back a little, bent down and gathered her in his arms. Before she could catch her breath, he’d carried her into the bedroom and placed her on the bed. Then he was kneeling between her legs, his fingers parting her as he gave her an intimate, six-second-to-climax openmouthed kiss.
The combination of tongue and lips and breath made her moan in delight. He licked her with the leisurely confidence of a man who knows what to do and likes doing it. She gave herself over to the steady stroking and the easy exploration.
Tension invaded her. Each clench of her muscles pushed her higher and closer. One summer while she was still in college, she’d played with the idea of becoming a doctor, so she’d read several medical textbooks. She knew the biological steps leading to an orgasm-the arousal, how the blood made the area feel hot, the mechanism involved in swelling, the response of the sympathetic nervous system.
But none of those words could begin to describe what it felt like to have Jack suck on the most nerve-filled place in her body. How there seemed to be a direct connection between that engorged spot between her legs and the rest of her. How each flick of his tongue made her stomach clench and her heels dig into the bed.
She felt herself getting closer and closer. He moved patiently, slowly, drawing out the experience. Taking her to the edge, then pulling back just enough to keep her from coming.
Again and again she caught sight of her release, only to have it move out of reach.
Then, without warning, he went faster. The quick flicks of his tongue caught her off guard. She had no time to prepare, no way to brace herself for the sudden explosion of pleasure that tore her apart.
Wave after wave of release swept through her. She pressed down, wanting to keep the feelings going. He gentled his touch but didn’t pull away. Not until she experienced the last shudder and was able to finally draw in a breath.
She opened her eyes and found him looking at her. Under any other circumstance, his smug grin would have annoyed her, but considering what he’d just done, she decided he’d earned it.
She grabbed him by his shirt front and urged him to slide up next to her. When he would have spoken, she touched his mouth with her fingers, telling him to be quiet. While she loved a good relationship conversation as much as the next woman, this was a time for silence.
When he was on his back, she unbuttoned his shirt, then kissed her way down his chest to his belly. He was warm and he tasted sexy and faintly sweet. She nipped at his side, which made him both laugh and groan, then she went to work on his jeans.
He was so hard she had trouble with the zipper but finally managed to get it unfastened. He helped her push down his jeans and briefs.
She knelt between his legs, taking in the beauty that was his aroused naked body. His erection called to her. She reached out and touched him, then stroked his length. He put his hand on top of hers.
“I don’t have any protection,” he said.
She smiled. “Come on, Jack. It’s me. When have I not prepared for every contingency?”
She leaned forward and opened his nightstand, then pulled out the condoms she’d put there before she’d started her bath.
Seconds later, the condom in place, she eased herself onto him.
He was big and thick and he filled her, stretching her inside in the most delicious way possible. She braced herself on her hands and knees, settling in for the ride.
His dark gaze met hers. “You really think I’m going to let you be on top?” he asked.
“Uh-huh.”
He reached for her breasts. “You’re right.”
She laughed, then rocked back and forth, easing herself onto him, then off. At the same time, he cupped her breasts, teasing her nipples and providing a heck of a distraction.
She forced herself to concentrate on that place where they joined, but it got more and more difficult as her body got lost in the pleasure. With each stroke, she drove herself closer to another orgasm.
She felt him tense beneath her. She rode him faster, taking them higher and harder, pushing toward their mutual goal.
He abandoned her breasts and grabbed her hips, holding her tightly enough to control the pace. It was just slow enough to make her whimper.
So close, she thought as she concentrated on the feel of him pushing inside of her again and again. So…
And then she was coming. Her release rushed through her, urging her on. Faster and faster until she felt him hold her still as he shuddered beneath her.
On and on their bodies joined, until they were both still.
Jack rolled her onto her side and withdrew. They stared at each other in the soft light of the room. He touched her face.
“I wasn’t going to let you do that,” he murmured.
“I know. You mad?”
“Not at you.”
At himself? Because he’d betrayed his promise to Hunter? Meri started to tell him it didn’t matter when it suddenly occurred to her that maybe it did. To him, at least. That maybe he regretted letting his friend down and that this had been the last promise he’d been able to keep.
Only he hadn’t.
“Jack…” she began.
He shook his head. “Don’t go there. Wherever you’re going, don’t.”
She opened her mouth, then closed it. She didn’t want to apologize. Not exactly. But she felt as if she should say something.
“I should go,” she murmured
“You don’t have to.”
She stared into his dark eyes and knew she wanted to stay. Even if it was just one night, she wanted to spend the time with him.
“I went to a psychic once,” she told him. “She told me that one day I would be in bed with the devil. I always knew she meant you. It’s not your fault you gave in. It was destiny.”
He smiled faintly. “You believe in psychics?”
“I believe in a lot of things. I’m very interesting.”
“Yes, you are.”
She sighed and snuggled close. “Are we going to make love again tonight?”
“Yes.”
“You can be on top this time if you want.”
He chuckled. “You’re not in charge.”
“Of course I am. I’m also totally irresistible. Right now you’re wondering how you resisted me for so long.”
“It’s like you can read my mind.”
She closed her eyes and breathed in the scent of him. Everything about this moment felt right, she thought. As if this was what she’d been waiting for. As if-
Wait a minute. She wasn’t supposed to like having sex with Jack. She was supposed to be getting her revenge and moving on. They weren’t supposed to connect.
They weren’t, she told herself. She was just emotionally gooey from the afterglow. It was a biological response. Her body’s attempt to bond with a man who was genetically desirable. Come morning, she would be totally over him and this and be ready to walk away. Her plan would go on as scheduled and she would be free to move forward with her life.
“I’m healed,” Meri told Betina the next morning as she poured milk over her cereal. “Seriously, if I had a limp, it would be gone.”
Betina looked her over. “Based on the smirk and the glow, I’m going to guess you and Jack did the wild thing last night.”
Meri sighed with contentment. “We did. It was fabulous. Better than I imagined, which is hard to believe. I feel like a new woman. A new woman with really, really clear skin!”
Betina laughed. “Okay. Good for you.”
“Any progress with Colin?”
“No. I watched a movie and he spent the evening on his computer. Then we went to bed separately.”
Meri felt her fabulous mood fade a little. “That sucks. You need to talk to him.”
“I’m not taking advice from you.”
“Why not? My plan is working perfectly. Jack has had me and now he wants more. But he’s not going to get any more. I’m walking away.”
“Really?”
“Absolutely.”
“And you don’t feel a thing?”
“I’m a little sore,” Meri said with a grin.
Betina slowly shook her head. “Okay. Then I was wrong. I guess you don’t have any feelings for him. If you’re not thinking about being with him again or wanting to hang out with him, then you are healed. Yay you.”
Her friend poured coffee and walked out of the kitchen. Meri stared after her.
She didn’t have feelings for Jack. Okay, sure, he was a friend and, as such, she would always have a soft spot for him. She was also willing to admit that not sleeping with him again might be difficult, but only because it had been so darned good. Not because she felt any kind of emotional connection.
But as she thought the words, she felt a little ping in her heart. One that warned her something might not be right.
“I don’t care about him,” she told herself. “I don’t.”
Which was a good thing, because falling for him would totally ruin her attempts at revenge.
She finished her cereal, rinsed the bowl and put it in the dishwasher. Then she walked into the dining room.
Someone rang the bell at the front door. She frowned. It was too early for the rest of the team, not to mention a delivery. So who on earth…?
She walked to the front of the house and opened the door. Her mind went blank as she stared at the man standing there. The man who swept her into his arms and kissed her.
“Hey, babe,” he said.
She swallowed. “Andrew. This is a surprise.”