Into the Lair

Chapter Forty-Three

Katie slowly closed the journal and lowered it to her lap, her fingers trembling as she fiddled with the worn edges. She raised her head to stare out the window at the ocean spreading out as far as the eye could see.

The window was cracked so she could hear the waves rolling in. The sound soothed her and eased some of the hypersensitivity she still experienced from the chemical Esteban had exposed her to.

She stared back down at the journal and then closed her eyes against the fear that tightened her chest. With a sigh, she uncurled her legs and pulled herself out of the plush armchair that Ian and Braden had positioned by the window. The others would want to know what the journal contained. They would need to know.

Fatigue weighed heavily on her. She’d worn herself out gauging her every mood, analyzing each twinge, each shift in temperament. She lived in fear that at any moment, with no provocation, she could turn into a wild creature. Not knowing what she might change into was killing her.

Marcus knew what had happened to her. The others still did not. It was time to tell them everything.

She headed down the stairs of the south wing. The island estate was huge, with stairs from all the wings converging into a central foyer. Most of the time, however, the members of Falcon and CHR gathered in the game room. They weren’t opposed to a little imbibing and some pot smoking, and pool was always a hot commodity.

She paused inside the doorway, suddenly unsure of herself, of her place in this crew of mercenaries. They were tougher than her, more ruthless. She admired that, wished she embodied more of their traits.

She wished she wasn’t so terrified.

Tyana and Eli stood at one corner of the pool table watching as Jonah leaned over to take his shot. Tyana leaned on one crutch while Eli supported her by wrapping his arm around her waist. Mad Dog stood back, cue in hand, and made a jeering noise when Jonah’s shot went wide. Ian and Braden leaned against the bar. Braden’s hands were shoved into his pockets, and he nodded at something Ian said.

Then he looked up and saw her. He straightened immediately, concern flashing on his face. Did she look as fragile as she felt?

He shoved off of the bar and crossed the room. He came to a stop just in front of her and reached for her hands.

“Hey,” he said softly. “You okay?”

She offered a faint smile and nodded.

“Come here.”

He tugged her against his chest, tucked her head under his chin and wrapped his arms around her. For a moment she relaxed into his hold, absorbing his strength and the comfort he offered. Then she carefully pulled away. She trembled as he smoothed his fingers down her arms and then captured her hands again.

“I finished the journal,” she said. “There are things that everyone should know. And other things…”

Braden studied her intently then tugged her forward. “Come over here where you’ll be comfortable.”

He wrapped an arm around her shoulders and led her toward the couch in front of the bar where Ian still stood.

The others stopped to look at her. Jonah’s gaze followed her, and when she met his eyes, his expression softened.

“I’d rather stand,” she said when Braden started to sit her down on the couch.

She slipped her fingers from his and took a few steps back. Ian’s hands clasped her shoulders, and his mouth brushed close to her ear.

“Are you okay?” he asked quietly. “Are you feeling well?”

She nodded and turned to face the others. She’d start with Esteban. Maybe by the time she’d explained all she’d read, the part where she divulged that she might turn into an unpredictable shifter might actually seem normal.

Tyana, Eli, Mad Dog and Jonah all stared at her expectantly. She wiped her palms down her jeans and took a deep breath.

“Esteban was a shifter. A wolf, to be more exact. Not a werewolf like the movies or legends. A real wolf.”

Shocked silence ensued.

Jonah stepped forward. “You want to run that by us again?”

“I saw him,” she said. “When he died. When he took his last breath, he shifted.” She glanced at Braden. “Do you remember?”

“I thought that part was a delusion,” Braden muttered. “So much of that time was so scattered. It all happened so fast, and when I look back it’s with such a sense of detachment, like I’m seeing something that happened through someone else’s eyes. Honestly I thought I was a little nuts.”

“According to his journal, he’s a natural shifter.”

Eli surged to attention, and Tyana put her hand on his arm.

“A what?” Mad Dog demanded. “What the hell is a natural shifter?”

“He was born that way,” Katie said softly. “Unfortunately, he had no control over when and how he shifted. He spent most of his life in seclusion. He began experimenting with a chemical that altered human DNA in early adulthood. I say he, but he only funded the research. He had no scientific background.”

She glanced at Eli and then Ian and Braden. “You were his first successful experiment. But only Eli and Gabe achieved the results he was interested in. Stability. He couldn’t accept that his genetic make-up couldn’t be changed, that there was no cure for his instability.”

“Christ,” Tyana muttered. “We’ve all been searching for the same thing. The bastard created his own problem in D and the others.”

Katie nodded. “Except, for whatever reason, Gabe and Eli gained full control of their abilities. Esteban became obsessed with reproducing that result. Which is why he came after me. I shared Gabe’s DNA. Eli had no family. He wanted my…”

She swallowed, and Ian’s hands tightened around her shoulders.

“What did he want?” Jonah asked.

She looked down as tears threatened. This part terrified her—admitting it—out loud. It made it real, and now she’d face a very uncertain future. What if…

“Baby, what’s wrong?” Braden asked, concern evident in his voice.

“He exposed me to the same chemical agent that you were exposed to,” she said in a low voice.

“What?”

The demand exploded across the room from at least three different places. Ian spun her around, his eyes wide with horror.

A tear rolled down her cheek as she shook in his arms. “I’m scared,” she whispered.

“Dear God, that’s why…” He broke off and dug a hand into his hair. “Jesus, that’s why you were in such pain, why you’re still so weak.”

“Son of a bitch,” Braden swore.

She found herself between the two men, their hands shaking as they stroked her arms and her back. They touched her face, her hair, held her close.

“I’m terrified of what will happen,” she choked out. “What am I going to do?”

She leaned her forehead against Ian’s chest, and he pressed his lips to the top of her head. His entire body shook against hers.

“Come sit down,” he said. “We’ll figure this out, okay? I don’t want you to worry.”

She smiled wanly at his attempt to infuse her with hope. But she allowed him to lead her to the couch. The others all gathered in the small sitting area. Tyana and Eli sat on the opposite couch while Mad Dog parked it on the arm of the chair that Jonah sat in. Ian and Braden flanked her on the couch, Ian holding her hand while Braden clasped her leg above her knee.

Jonah leaned forward, his expression serious. “You won’t be alone, Katie. Falcon will help you in any way we can.”

“She’ll have us,” Braden said softly.

Jonah nodded, his expression easing.

“I think everyone is missing a very important question here,” Mad Dog said. “Was Esteban really a natural shifter or was he bat-shit crazy? Is it even possible? Does that change anything for Eli, D, Ian and Braden or is all hope for a cure gone?”

Eli propped his elbows on his knees and scrubbed at his face.

“Eli, don’t,” Tyana pleaded. “You don’t have to do this.”

He grimaced and then reached over to squeeze her hand. “Yeah, sugar, I do.”

He focused his weary gaze on Ian and Braden, regret brimming in his dark eyes.

“I’ve been lying to you guys for a long time.”

Katie glanced anxiously at Ian and Braden as confusion darkened their faces.

“What?” Braden asked.

“The chemical that turned you into cats…it didn’t affect me.”

“Of course it did,” Ian said. “Hell, I’ve seen you shift.”

“I was born a shifter,” Eli said quietly. “It’s a secret I’ve carried since I was ten years old. It just became easier to disguise after what happened in Adharji. I no longer had to hide my ability from you because suddenly I was provided an explanation. Gabe was stable so it didn’t stretch probability that I was too.”

“Holy fuck,” Mad Dog breathed. “Has the entire world gone crazy? That shit just doesn’t happen.”

“So Gabe was the only one who truly turned out the way Esteban envisioned?” Katie asked painfully.

“Apparently so,” Ian muttered.

Braden held up his hand. “Whether or not Esteban was a natural shifter is irrelevant. The fucker is dead. What we need to be worried about is the fact that the son of a bitch gassed Katie.”

Ian nodded and then he turned to her again. “Does Marcus know?”

She nodded slowly.

“What did he suggest?”

She closed her eyes. “He said all I could do was wait and see. There’s nothing he can do.” Her voice cracked. “No tests he can run. No cure if I’m affected.”

Braden cursed and turned away, his fists rolled into tight balls against the couch.

Tyana stared across at her with a stricken expression. “I’m sorry, Katie.”

“We’re getting ahead of ourselves here,” Jonah said. “We don’t know that Katie will be affected. I say we don’t borrow trouble. Take it one day at a time.”

He glanced sorrowfully at Tyana. “We already knew that finding a cure was a long shot.”

Tyana looked away, tears brimming in her eyes.

“We can’t just give up,” Ian said fiercely. He gripped Katie’s hand and brought it to his lips. “We can beat this, Katie. What happened at the compound with Braden. Explain that. It was a breakthrough. Maybe a step forward.”

“You’re not alone,” Braden added as he took her other hand.

“Aren’t I?” she asked. “Sometimes I feel like I’ve always been alone. Gabe was all I had left, and now he’s gone. I have nothing to go back to.”

Ian and Braden went completely still next to her. She felt the stares of the entire group, and she shifted uncomfortably on the couch under their scrutiny.

“Maybe we should leave you three alone for a while,” Jonah said as he stood.

Eli helped Tyana to her feet. Mad Dog slid off the arm of the chair and ambled to the door. And then she was alone with Ian and Braden.

She leaned forward and buried her face in her hands. She was so tired. Her body still fought the effects of the chemical. Moving hurt, more than she let on. All she wanted to do was curl up in a ball and sleep.

“You’re hurting,” Ian said quietly.

She nodded without opening her eyes.

“Katie, look at me,” Ian prompted.

She opened her eyes and turned her head to stare at him.

“I love you.”

Such powerful words. No one had ever said them to her before. They were staggering. She’d heard them, been flip about them, but hearing them now, directed at her…it shattered her.

“I love you,” Braden whispered next to her ear.

She turned, her breath held in her chest. She stared in wonder at him and then turned back to look at Ian.

“I—”

“Shhh.” Ian placed a finger gently over her lips. “Hear us out.”

Braden scooted up so that he was in her line of vision. Ian reached over and curled his fingers around her palm and stroked lightly with his thumb.

“We want you to go back to Argentina with us. CHR has a house there. A compound, really. Eli doesn’t have a need for it. His life is here with Tyana and Falcon.”

She swung her gaze back to Braden to gauge his reaction. There was calm in his expression. Sincerity.

“We want you with us, Katie.”

“But what if…what if I become—”

“What if you become what?” Ian prompted. “Like us?”

She nodded.

“Whatever happens, we’re going to be with you,” Braden said.

His voice slid over her, a promise she reached for and held tight.

“You won’t be left behind, Katie. Not ever again. Do you understand that? We want you with us. Always.”

She wrapped her arms around Ian and held on tight. “I love you too,” she whispered against his neck.

He gathered her close and buried his lips in her hair. He stroked the back of her head with his hand as he murmured in her ear. She pulled slowly away and then turned to Braden.

“I love you.”

He touched her cheek and smiled, his teeth flashing his boyish grin. Then he leaned in and kissed her, long and sweet. So exquisitely gentle, as though she’d crumble with the slightest touch.

“I want you to get better,” he said. “I want to make love to you again.”

Her face fell and she looked away.

“Hey,” he said softly. “What was that for?”

“I’m just afraid of what will happen if the chemical affected me badly. What if it ruins everything?”

Braden and Ian both reached for her hands until she held both of theirs in her lap.

“No matter what, we’ll always be together,” Ian said. “Believe that if you believe nothing else.”

“We’ll make it,” Braden added. “Together.”

Some of her fear lifted, and she smiled a shaky smile. She squeezed their hands and then brought them up to kiss them both. “Together,” she agreed.