Luke

Chapter 4

Faith had her usual Sunday and Monday off, and since the clinic was closed, she considered a bike ride, a movie… even a shopping spree. Instead, she made the mistake of looking in her office. Seeing the stacks of paperwork waiting for her there, she ended up working both days.

On Tuesday, Healing Waters opened to slightly more patients than any time since Dr. Walker's public disdain. Wednesday, the same.

The rest of the week went by without event, other than each day showing an extremely slight increase of business, with references from the hospital and local doctors starting to pile in.

Hope among the staff surged, and Faith felt so great she didn't even crave chocolate.

By Saturday, their schedule was busting at the seams, with a shocking number of people asking to be put with Dr. Walker.

Seemed he really was a savior-theirs.

Suddenly Faith could see the light at the end of the tunnel, the day when they'd be fully operating in the black. When it got there, she'd take her first big sigh of relief since using her retirement funds to open the place. But for now, she had a lot of holding her breath left to do, and a lot of writing with red pencil on the books.

Still, the hope that had begun like a small seed in her chest earlier in the week blossomed, and she couldn't contain her smile as she came downstairs from her little apartment into the staff room.

Shelby, Guy and Catherine-their herbalist-were sitting at a table sharing wheat muffins and arguing over which one of the wildflowers in the vase in the center of the table provided the most calming effect. The muffins were clearly from Shelby-their resident health nut-and the coffee was from Guy, who needed caffeine by the bucketful.

Faith joined them, her stomach going happy, but before she stuffed in her first bite of muffin, Luke opened the back door.

Immediately the dynamics in the room changed from light and easygoing to speculative. Shelby, Guy and Cat all looked at Faith, clearly waiting for her reaction in order to decide upon theirs. So she did what she had to do even though she had no idea how she felt at the sight of him. She smiled brightly. "Well, good morning, Dr. Walker."

Looking at least far more rested than he had last Saturday, he nodded curtly. "Schedule?"

Okay, so he wasn't an easygoing, exchange-banalities kind of guy.

And he probably would rather be doing anything else today.

"Here." Shelby handed him a copy of the day's schedule, then checked her watch. "Oops, gotta run." She nudged Cat and Guy, both of whom made a big spectacle out of leaving Faith alone with Luke.

"Subtle," he said when the door shut behind them.

"Don't tell them, they think they pulled it off." Leaning back against the counter, casually crossing one long leg over the other, looking unreasonably gorgeous and edgy in his dark trousers, and dark shirt sleeves shoved up to the elbows revealing forearms corded with strength, and big, clean hands, he studied her with an inscrutable expression. "So what's up? You going to fire me?"

Startled, she laughed. "Why would I do that?"

He lifted a broad shoulder. "Because last week we clashed over just about everything except breathing."

She looked into his light, light eyes and was startled by the vulnerability there. "We didn't clash on our passion over healing people."

"Imagine that… common ground." His gaze held hers for an immeasurable beat, during which time she couldn't have looked away to save her life. In her quest to resent him last week-resent him and need him at the same time-how had she missed the fire, the passion burning in his eyes?

"Actually," she said, "I didn't expect you to show."

"I promised three months."

"Your hospital promised."

"Same thing. I don't go back on my word."

"Even when it goes against the grain?"

"You're healing here. I'm a healer. It's what I do, it's my life." He shrugged, and with a few words, spoke volumes. "I'm here for the duration."

She'd always, always, been a sucker for a man in love with what he was doing with his life. She wouldn't have guessed that about Dr. Universe, and she wished she didn't know now. She didn't have time in her life for this, this… whatever it was that happened to her insides when he so much as looked at her. "We uh, have patients."

"So it begins again."

She caught the slight quirk of his lips and wasn't as successful in hiding her own rueful smile. "It begins again," she agreed.

"Good day to you, then."

"And you." She followed him into the hallway and toward the patient rooms. And yes, maybe she stared at his very fine butt just before he shrugged into a doctor's coat, but she doubted there was a woman alive who wouldn't have done the exact same thing in her position.

"Emma Connelly," he said, studying the first chart.

"Oh, she's mine." Faith reached for the paperwork. "We have you starting with the walk-ins this morning. Room six first, there's a man waiting for you. He's suffering from allergies and-"

"It says here Emma Connelly is terminal. Ovarian cancer."

"Yes." Faith hugged the chart to her chest at the ache his words invoked. She'd known Emma for four years, watched her battle through the vicious cancer with everything she had. There was little left, and Healing Waters was dedicated to making her last days as comfortable as possible. "The aromatherapy is the only thing that eases her headaches these days. She gave up her meds, they made her so ill she couldn't function. Guy gives her therapeutic massages that keeps her muscles relaxed. The pain is so severe that-"

"There are drugs that could help. Fast acting, new drugs that-" He stopped at the look on her face and let out a disparaging breath. "Right. Shut up, Luke."

"She's tried everything. She's at the end," she said softly, her throat tight from hearing it out loud. "All she wants now is comfort. That's what we're giving her, it's all we have to give."

"Fine."

She thought that was the end of it, so when she turned away and entered the patient room, she was shocked to realize he'd followed. She introduced him to Emma, and the two of them started chatting, easily, readily.

Faith watched as Luke charmed Emma into talking about her medical history, giving him all the information he seemed to want to know, all in a genuinely relaxed conversation.

And Emma was smiling… nothing beat the sight of that. Smiling even as she shook her head over the drug methods of pain reduction that Luke tried talking to her about.

She wanted to stick with what worked for her, what soothed her, in what surely were her last days. And Faith had to give Luke credit, he never expressed disappointment or anger or any emotion at all over his advice not being taken, he simply took it in stride, then headed out to see other patients while Faith continued with Emma.

Later, Faith's shoulder brushed his as they passed each other in the hallway. "So why did you do it?" she asked, unable to let it go.

Against the wall was one of the many mini water fountains in the clinic. Luke moved closer to it, watching the water hit the pretty rocks. "Do what?"

"With Emma. Try to bring conventional medicine into this, after I told you she wasn't interested."

He looked at her for a long moment, clearly trying to weigh his words. She wondered if he was struggling to be politically correct, so that his "punishment" wouldn't be increased.

"Knowledge is power," he finally said simply. "And I had to make sure she understood all the possible techniques, scientific or otherwise."

When she opened her mouth to remind him she'd already gone over all possible treatments with Emma, that Emma's choice had been made long before she'd even stepped foot inside the clinic, Luke put a finger over her lips.

Instantly, she went still, bombarded with sensations that had nothing to do with temper.

Heat from the rough pad of his finger.

Tingling from within her belly.

Quivering from between her thighs.

"We're going to have to agree to disagree on this," he said softly. "In fact, we're going to have to agree to disagree on just about everything." He let out a low, rough laugh. "You do know that, don't you, Faith?"

What she knew was that he'd just used her name in a silky voice, and hearing it on his lips gave the moment such a sense of intimacy, it was a drug more potent than his voice, than even his smile.

Then his finger left her mouth and she was blinking at his broad, strong shoulders as he walked away from her, heading toward the wing where he'd do most of his work that day, with her walk-in patients.

She let him go, a little overwhelmed by the odd and unsettling mix of emotions he caused within her. She'd wondered how he was going to handle the time he had left here, but now, watching him go, with her body in an uproar, she wondered… how was she going to handle it?

Several hours later a familiar dizziness reminded Faith she wasn't invincible. That she was still a little run-down, an open invitation for getting sick. But damn it, she couldn't afford to give in to this virus right now. Stopping in the staff room, she grabbed the turkey sandwich she'd made for lunch. And if her stomach quietly suggested she add dessert to the sandwich, she ignored it. She was a health professional, and she'd eat like one. Even if it killed her.

She was on her way back to her next patient when she heard a distinct giggle. A child's giggle, which was an irresistible sound.

It came again, and she followed it to room three. Peeking in the ajar door, she saw a towheaded blond boy of about five, lying on his back on the patient table, playing with an oxygen mask. He was Billy Hemdon, a regular.

Next to him, also on his back, though a good part of his long, hard body hung off the other side, was one Dr. Luke Walker. He held an oxygen mask too, and they both looked at the ceiling together, playing with the equipment.

Now that Faith was closer, she could hear the rattle of Billy's breathing. Another asthma attack, a bad one given the volume of the wheezing.

"So." Luke glanced at Billy. "You think you're ready to sit with Cat now?"

"If you come."

"It's only an herbal treatment," Luke said in a perfectly natural voice, but even so, Faith nearly laughed because it was all in the man's eyes. The idea of a herbal treatment was so foreign as to be alien.

"Hey, how 'bout you go first?" Billy asked. "Then you can do it to me."

"That's Cat's job." Luke blinked innocently. "I don't want to hurt her feelings."

"But I want it to be your job," Billy said, adding a thrust of his lower lip. He pulled the oxygen mask away from his mouth and began wheezing again.

Gently Luke put it back in place. "How about I walk you down there, and stay with you? Deal?"

"Will you go first? You just breathe in flowers and junk. And Cat holds your hand and sings songs while you do it, funny ones about cows and bees."

Luke lifted a brow. "So you know it doesn't hurt."

The little boy smiled guiltily. "Sorta."

"Sorta." Luke ruffled his hair. "You trying to trick me, Billy?"

"Sorta."

Luke grinned. "It almost worked."

"But I still want you to do it first. Will you, Dr. Walker?" He batted his dark lashes. "Pretty please?"

"Yes, Dr. Walker," Faith said softly, coming into the room. "Pretty please?"

Lifting his head, Luke leveled his gaze on her. "Well, if it isn't Nurse McDowell. I wonder if she knows all the modern advances we've made on asthma, and how you could benefit from any of the numerous new drugs on the market?"

"Yes, but I'm lurgic to them," the boy announced proudly.

"Yes, you are," Faith said. "Very allergic. Which is why we use these other techniques."

With a sigh, Luke sat up. His hair was tousled, his eyes sleepy from lying down for so long, and right then and there, even braced for their usual disagreement, even bogged down by her annoyance at having to put up with him at all, Faith experienced another little unwanted flutter inside.

How was it possible she wanted this man?

And yet… stubborn, egotistical and single-minded as he was, he truly was amazing with her patients. As she thought it, he reached out for Billy's hand, which the boy happily gave him. "I guess," Dr. Walker said with a gusty sigh, "I could go first."

"Yippee!" Billy cried. Together they walked past Faith-both giving her a little wave, Luke adding a little brow raise to that wave, one that told her they weren't finished, not by a long shot-and out the door they went, with Billy, for the first time in recent memory, grinning.

Faith took a moment and sat, not sure if her weak knees could be attributed to not feeling great, or Luke himself. Today alone he'd brought a smile to a terminal cancer patient, a laugh to a child suffering with life-threatening asthma.

And a hitch to her own heart.

Not bad for his second week in the place.

When all the patients had gone for the day, Faith sat cross-legged in the center of her bed with some herbal tea and a stack of bills. Being alone was the usual state for her at night, and while occasionally she felt a little lonely, a little unsure if maybe she'd let too much of life pass her by, for the most part she was fine with her own company. After all, she was very used to it.

Her missionary parents, wonderful and loving and warm as they were, gave most of their energy away to the people they helped. Her sister, Michelle, had chosen a similar path, working as a traveling midwife in Europe.

Faith used to resent how much they gave to everyone but their own family, and yet here she sat, not doing things so very differently.

Yeah, well… if once in a while she let loneliness for family, or even a close, personal relationship encroach, she could deal with that. She'd chosen this life, and chosen it readily. Willingly. It was what she wanted.

Though what she wanted right now was to be horizontal. All she had to do was prioritize the bills for tonight and she could hit the sack. It'd been a good, solid day, and she felt happy and content with all they'd accomplished, but she could admit she was looking forward to stripping down and crawling between her fuzzy sheets. Oblivion, that's what she needed. Just six hours would do it, would beat back the viral infection she could feel at the far edges of her mind, trying as always to creep in and take hold.

She wouldn't let it. Not this time.

She had too much to do.

It was quiet downstairs. Her staff had all gone long ago. She hadn't seen Luke go, but assumed he hadn't been able to get out of there fast enough.

She'd just separated all the invoices when she heard a noise from below, a soft thud. Though she wasn't a fearful sort, she wasn't stupid. They did have supplies here, and despite Luke's mocking, they had some drugs as well. Grabbing the portable phone-with her finger on the 9-1-1 autodial-and her handy dandy baseball bat over her shoulder, she went down the stairs.

The staff room was still lit, so someone hadn't left yet. As she stood there, Luke came out of the rest room, washing his hands.

"You're still here," she said inanely.

"Just leaving." In a startlingly intimate gesture, he shifted his weight closer to hers and lifted her chin. "You have circles beneath your eyes."

"I… do?"

"You look beat to shit."

"Well, why don't you just say whatever is on your mind?" She let out an embarrassed little laugh and tried to turn away but he held her still for his inspection.

"All right. You look tired. You're not taking good enough care of yourself."

"I am so. I eat right, and I look after myself religiously."

"Yeah?" Still touching her face, his thumb slid over her skin.

Hit with a myriad of sensations from just his touch, she froze. He froze, too, all except his thumb, which went on another lazy circle. Eyes on hers, he shifted even closer.

"This," she said shakily, "is a bad idea."

"No doubt." But he gently slid his fingers into her hair and bent closer.

She leaned into him. "We should be running for the hills."

"Again, no doubt." His mouth was only a breath away. His eyes, clear and bold, never left hers.

And yet it was she who rose up on tiptoe and went to meet him halfway. Their lips met, clung for one long glorious instant before they both pulled back.

Stared at each other.

Let out two mutually shocked breaths.

At the sudden knock on the back door, Faith jumped.

"Expecting someone?" he asked.

She hadn't been expecting him. When she shook her head, he moved to the door and looked through the peephole. With a sudden oath, he pulled back and hauled open the door, grabbing a woman on the back step cradling her hand to her chest.

Faith recognized Luke's cleaning lady from when she'd gone to his house the week before.

"What happened?" he demanded.

The first litany that exploded from Carmen came in Spanish.

"English, English," Luke urged, reaching out to support her hand, which came away from her chest bloody.

"English?" she sputtered. "How's this for English? Your damn fancy window in the living room was stuck open, and it looked like rain so I had to climb-" She sucked in a harsh breath. "Don't squeeze it, you idiot!"

With one arm around her, the other supporting her hurt hand, he moved past Faith and went inside. "Let me look at you."

"You must have painted that stupid window open," Carmen said. "Big surprise there, eh? Big hotshot doctor who can't hammer a nail? The wind started bringing in dirt-"

"Carmen-"

"And damn you, I'd spend the afternoon dusting-"

"Shut up. Carmen, this is Faith McDowell. Faith, Carmen."

"Nice to see you again. I'm not doing windows anymore, you thankless bastard," Carmen said, and beyond the temper in her voice, Faith heard genuine pain.

"If I'm so thankless why did you come looking for me instead of going to the E.R.?"

"Because they're crooks."

Still holding on to Carmen, he looked at Faith. "She needs stitches."

"Stitches? Well, that explains why there's spots spinning in front of my eyes…" Carmen clamped her mouth shut as the whites of her eyes flashed.

"Perfect," Luke grunted as she fainted, scooping up her lifeless body in his arms. "Lead the way before I collapse from the dead weight."

Humor. Faith hadn't imagined he had any. Racing ahead of him, flipping on lights as they went, she led the way to a patient room.

And over the next hour, as he stitched Carmen's hand, he showed Faith a lot of that humor as he dealt with Carmen's medical phobia in the most heartbreaking, tender way she could have imagined.

"Elevate it," she said to Carmen at the exact same time Luke did.

He looked at her. "I'm going to prescribe painkillers, too. Want to say it in tandem?"

"I'm not against painkillers," she said so primly he laughed.

"Wow. Stop the world. We agree again." Hands on his hips, he turned to Carmen and let out a long-suffering sigh. "I suppose you'll need a ride."

Carmen swore at him in Spanish, then sniffed. "Si, I took a cab here."

When Luke got her to the back door, he stopped and looked at Faith. "Thanks for letting me treat her here after hours. Just bill me. I've got to get her to my car now." He was supporting all her weight. "She's going to break my back."

Carmen used her good hand to hit him upside the head.

Luke grinned. "See? You're feeling better already."

Faith held the door open. "So… see you next Saturday."

His gaze met hers over the top of Carmen's head. The humor was gone now, and suddenly she braced herself. He was going to say he wasn't coming back.

Which, really, would be fine. More than fine. They rubbed each other the wrong way, they… also rubbed each other the right way.

"Next week," he agreed softly, and then he was gone, leaving her staring out into the night, wondering if she felt relieved… or terrified.

On Monday morning Luke was called into Leo's office at the hospital. "Good news," his friend boomed.

"Faith McDowell gave you a glowing recommendation. You must have made quite an impression these last two weeks, with all those hot oil therapies and healing touches."

Luke opened his mouth, saw the twinkle in Leo's eyes and relaxed. "Sure. Make fun. You're not the one having to give up two and a half months more of Saturdays."

"You don't either."

"What?"

Leo lifted a brow. "She released you. Said that while she was impressed with your grasp of alternative healing techniques-"

Luke snorted.

Leo shot him a long look. "You don't need to fulfill the rest of your time at the clinic."

Faith had released him from his duty.

This was just about the last thing he expected. He waited for the elation. For the satisfaction. For the sheer overwhelming relief.

Leo laughed at his confusion. "I thought you'd be dancing in the hallways at the news."

"Yeah." Luke walked the length of the office and looked out the window. Dancing in the hallways? He would, but suddenly his stomach had fallen to a region somewhere near his toes. "Leo-"

Leo's pager went off. "Sorry, gotta run."

Yeah. So did Luke. The E.R. was full and they were short staffed. Over the rest of the day he removed two spleens, set a broken hip, stitched up a motorcyclist… and never stopped thinking about Healing Waters. Faith.

Why had she released him? She needed him, she'd said so. She needed his visible, public support. She needed the free additional medical staff. She needed… him.

He couldn't shake it, which was the only reason he stopped by the clinic after his shift instead of going home. It had nothing, nothing at all, to do with wanting to see her again.

No one answered his knock downstairs, but that made sense as the clinic was always closed on Mondays. Going around the back, he took the stairs, which were lined with potted plants. On her porch sat a comfy looking wooden swing. Her back door had a large window in it, lined with lace, which allowed him a clear look into her lit kitchen.

And what his clear look afforded him stopped his heart.

Faith, slumped on the floor.