Much Ado About Vampires

Chapter Fifteen

You’d think that two people with reasonable intelligence and in a good state of health would be able to overpower one tiny little poufy-haired woman, but if that tiny woman was also a demon lord, you’d be very, very wrong.

“Ouch!” I yelled, trying to punch Sally when she slammed me against the back of the elevator, throwing Ulfur in after me. “You son of a bitch! I’ll get you for this!”

I lunged at her, unable to get up with Ulfur lying across my legs, but I did try to bite her. She waved a hand and I hit the floor again.

“Oh, please,” she said, making a gesture that had me frozen to the floor, Ulfur lying half on top of me.

She stepped across our bodies, pressing a button and humming softly along with the elevator music as we began to descend.

“I knew it! I knew a demon lord couldn’t be good!” Alec!

Beloved, are you all right? Where are you?

In an elevator, lying on the floor. Alec, the wrath demons . . . Sally is evil! I knew she was evil! She took us all in!

Why are you—sins of the saints!

What’s wrong?

Other than the fact that Kristoff and I are trying to keep from being beheaded by two wrath demons, you mean?

Oh. Am I distracting you?

Are you harmed?

No.

Then you are distracting me. I will come to you as soon as we destroy these demons’ forms.

“Good, bad . . . that’s so black-and-white when there are so many shades of gray that are far more interesting,” Sally said complacently.

“Oh, you think you’re so smart,” I growled. “Just you wait until Alec takes care of your demon minions! Then we’ll show you what’s what. Right, Ulfur?”

“Urgh,” he groaned.

“Exactly. You’ll be one sorry chickie, and I just can’t wait to tell your boyfriend about you.”

Sally continued humming for a few seconds as a horrible thought occurred to me.

“Merciful Mary! He’s in it with you, isn’t he? Oh! And to think I believed him when he said the Sovereign recommended you. What bull! Well, I can tell you, we will be having a little chat with this Sovereign dude, and telling him . . . it . . . all about you and Terrin!”

Sally was about to reply when the elevator opened to reveal a couple with a small child in hand. “I’m sorry, but would you mind waiting? My friends here are about to threaten me with untold torments, and I’m very curious to see what exactly those will be. I hope they include thumbscrews. I love thumbscrews. They look so innocuous, and yet can give you such marvelous results, don’t you think?”

The couple fled toward the stairs, the small child in the man’s arms.

“That’s just one more thing I’m going to mention to the Sovereign,” I told Sally’s ankle.

“Tattletales never end up good,” was all she said as we descended again.

“What are you going to do with us?” I tried very hard not to let even so much as a hint of a quaver taint my voice.

“A friend has badly wanted to see you, and I am obliging him.”

“Friend? You have a friend? I thought people like you just used others.”

“Such ingratitude,” Sally said, buffing a nail with absolute lack of concern about anything I said. “And to think I’ve gone to so much trouble about you. Ah, here we are.”

We hadn’t descended to the basement, or some dank lower floor that only hotel employees used; no, the doors slid open to reveal another cream-and-gold-colored hallway, and three pairs of legs. Men’s legs, two pairs in black pants, one in jeans. I couldn’t move my head to look up and see who they were, but I knew without a single shred of doubt that Sally was about to hand Ulfur and me over to Bael.

“I’ll get you, too,” I told the pair of feet nearest me. His shoes were expensive-looking, the kind you see on billionaire businessmen as they step out of their limos. “And if I don’t, I know a vamp who will!”

“Why is it mortals insist on believing they have the least amount of power against me?” a plummy English voice asked as the expensive shoes stepped to the side. “What did you do to them, Sally?”

I wondered if I should let Alec know that Sally had grabbed Ulfur and me, but decided that distracting him with that information now could have deadly consequences. I’d wait until he gave me the all clear; then I’d tattle on Sally like she’d never been tattled on before.

“Damn you!” I snarled at the shoes, struggling to force my body upright. It was no use—whatever Sally had done to us held me to the floor like I was nailed there.

“Just a simple immobility spell, my prince. She was getting a bit difficult. Well, you know how mortals are—they can raise such a fuss over the most trivial of things.”

“Trivial like betraying us when we trusted you?” I gasped, outraged at her callousness.

“Bring both the woman and the lich. It will be my pleasure to show them both what my wrath truly consists of.”

I did not like the sound of that. Maybe now would be a good time to tell Alec what was going on. Then again, if he was still battling with Bael’s wrath demons, it might make things worse.

Much worse.

“Be careful,” Sally advised. “The female bites.”

No, I had better take care of this myself, at least until Alec was free to help Ulfur and me.

“Damned straight I do!” I glared at the pair of shoes nearest me as two hands hefted me up, slinging me facedown across a man’s shoulder. I growled as my face was buried in his suit coat, blinding me to everything but a narrow slice of floor visible when I rolled my eyes to the top of my head. “I swear by all that’s holy, you’ll pay for this! You all will!”

“She’s also fairly antagonistic, although that probably is to be expected,” I heard Sally say as she followed behind us.

“Where are you taking us?” I demanded to know of the man’s back.

Bael wasn’t hauling me around, but it was he who answered . . . in a bland voice that nonetheless left my skin crawling. “I do not recall giving you leave to speak, woman.”

“And I don’t recall giving you the right to make me your Tool, and yet here I am!” I snapped in return.

“Cora, Cora, Cora,” Sally said in a disapproving tone. “Dear one, I realize you are not versed in the etiquette of Abaddon, but surely even you must realize that one simply does not snarl at Lord Bael without suffering the consequences.”

I had a horrible feeling that the word “suffering” was going to take on a very real meaning, one I was pretty darned desperate to avoid, so despite my desire to do otherwise, I kept the string of abuse I wished to hurl at everyone’s heads behind my teeth.

“Silence the woman if she continues,” Bael said in an offhand voice as a door was opened and I was tossed onto a bed, Ulfur dumped next to me. We were still immobile, so I couldn’t even roll over or shove Ulfur’s torso off my legs, but I could see Sally as she faced Bael near the doorway of the hotel room.

“Oh, I will, naturally, because you know, life is just too short to put up with people lipping off to you. Well, not my life,” Sally said with a giggle. I ground my teeth and wished I could fire some of Bael’s power right at her. “But you know what I mean—life in general. In fact, I had better silence her now, because she’s sure to scream and beg and plead and generally carry on, and I wouldn’t want to disturb you.”

“The day will never come when begging and pleading disturbs me,” Bael said with a gesture that had his two companions dissolving into nothing. “But you may silence the woman if you desire. She will not need to have a mouth in order to be unmade.”

“Hey!” I said, my skin crawling again at the casual way they both talked about what could only be torture. “I am right here! And I like my mouth! Sally, for the love of all that’s holy . . . er . . . for the love of . . . crap! All I can think of are appeals to your goodness, and you’re so utterly not good, the comparison would be obscene. I don’t know why you’re doing this, but I should point out that Alec will not tolerate you abusing me in any way, shape, or form. And I know Pia won’t let you do anything to Ulfur, either. What . . . er . . . what did you mean we would be unmade?” The last bit was directed at Bael, who ignored me to consult his cell phone.

“Do you know,” Sally said slowly, looking particularly thoughtful as she sat on my feet, making me bite back an exclamation of pain, “I believe Cora might have a point? That brings to mind something I should tell you, my lord.”

An unearthly wail rose high into the night, like the sound of a thousand souls in torment all crying out at once.

“Jesus wept, what was that?” I gasped, the hairs on my arms standing on end.

“Oh, dear, that would be just exactly what I was going to mention,” Sally said, tsking softly to herself. “That was one of Bael’s sweet wrath demons, Cora. Evidently the Dark Ones destroyed it. And although I would never presume to speak for the Lord Bael, I believe he’s referring to the fact that his Tools cannot be destroyed. Otherwise”—she gave a delighted little giggle—“he would simply kill you and be done with it.”

“You are the meanest person I have ever met, and I grew up in the San Fernando Valley—you haven’t seen mean until you’ve been deemed too lacking to join the popular girls’ clique,” I told Sally, even though I couldn’t see her where she sat crushing my feet.

“Flattery, my little dumpling of delight, will get you everywhere. Now, what was I saying? Oh, yes, about the unmaking. You can’t be destroyed, you see? Otherwise Lord Bael would simply squash you into a Cora-shaped smear on the carpet. But I imagine he doesn’t want you to be left sitting around annoying him, either.”

“I do not,” Bael agreed, obviously in the middle of texting something. My inner devil gave a little deranged giggle at the idea of Satan addicted to his smart phone. I wondered if he did Facebook. “The entrance the lich used to gain access to my palace in Abaddon in order to steal my Tools has been sealed up, so no others will be able to use it.” He glanced up, his gaze on Ulfur for a moment. “The lich will, of course, be suitably punished for his part in wasting my valuable time, but once I am satisfied that my vengeance has been wrought, it is better that the Tools be unmade so that they will pose no further threat.”

Fear on Ulfur’s behalf gripped my guts at his intentions about punishment. I heard Ulfur gasp in horror, but he said nothing, evidently feeling the less attention that was focused on him, the better.

I agreed and, in an attempt to draw Bael’s attention to me, asked, “But what’s this unmaking stuff? I thought Terrin said there was no way to separate the Tools from us?”

“There isn’t, sugar, there isn’t,” Sally said, rising and patting my squashed ankles. “I’m afraid when Lord Bael unmakes the Tool inside you—and he needs to find the Agrippa who made the Tools in order to unmake them—then you’ll be unmade, as well. Sad, of course, but what can you do? We can’t have you Tools running around where anyone can take advantage of Lord Bael. That would be unthinkable.”

“Oh, completely,” I said with acid sarcasm. “Sally, you amaze me, you really do. You look so nice, but you truly don’t have a heart, do you? It doesn’t bother you one single damned infinitesimally small bit that you’ve betrayed Ulfur and me, does it? You honestly do not have one single iota of sympathy for us, or even care that he, that man who is essentially the devil, is going to torture and destroy us. It just doesn’t matter a fig to you, right? ”

“Dear one, I am a demon lord,” she said with a gentle smile. “Heartless is what we do best. Besides, Lord Bael would never tolerate someone who had compassion as a prince of Abaddon. It’s just not done.”

I closed my eyes for a moment, my heart sick. I had to figure out a way to get Ulfur and me away from them . . . or at least survive long enough for Alec to finish off the second wrath demon so he could come save us. I’ve never been a big fan of women needing a man to save them, but I was willing to recognize there was a time and place for it, and if ever I saw one, this was it.

“To get back to this unmaking business,” I said, trying to stall for time. “What exactly is an Agrippa, and—”

Bael had no issue with cutting me off. “My time is valuable, Sally. What is it you wish to say to me?” he asked, putting away his phone and making a slight gesture of annoyance.

“As Cora mentioned, she’s a Beloved.” Sally pointed to me. “And he’s a lich, and his lichmaster is the Beloved of another Dark One.”

Bael frowned. “That is of little concern to me.”

“Not in the sense of it being a threat to you, of course not,” Sally said soothingly, undulating her way over to him, smiling her perky, tooth-filled smile. I wondered how she—even as evil as she obviously was—could stand doing so to a man who more or less exuded terror. “No one can threaten you, you’re so very powerful.”

I couldn’t swear from where I was lying, but she may very well have batted her eyelashes at him.

“If you have a point, make it. I have much work to do to locate the Agrippa who made the Tools,” Bael said, looking anything but impressed.

“Now, you know me, sugar—my poor little brain simply cannot cut to the chase the way yours does,” Sally said, and this time I was sure she was flirting with Bael. She touched his hand as she all but cooed up to him. “However, I know you’re a busy, busy man, so I will simply point out that where there are Beloveds, there are bound to be angry Dark Ones, and where there are angry Dark Ones, there is the Moravian Council. And I know that, given the nature of the relationship between you and the council, you do not want to antagonize them.”

What was this? Did the vamps have some sort of a hold over Bael? If so, why had Alec not mentioned it before? I wanted badly to ask him. Alec? How are things going?

Argh!

That well, huh?

We destroyed the form of one of the demons, but the other . . .

I felt his pain as a blade slashed his arm. I winced, feeling guilty for distracting him when he needed to be focused.

Sorry. Radio silence until you’re done there.

Bael said nothing for a moment, his gaze turned inward before he finally said, “I will see to them, myself. One of my lieutenants is still with them, so I will simply ensure that they understand their minions are beyond their help. You will take these two to my palace, and await the arrival of the Agrippa.”

Sally bowed her head. “As you desire, my lord. I live, as you know, to do your bidding.”

I waited until Bael closed the door as he left before I hissed to Sally, “You are going to be so sorry when Alec gets through with you. And I am not Alec’s minion!”

Sally rolled her eyes and headed for the bathroom. “Must powder my nose. Be back in a mo.”

Alec, I hate to distract you, but you have incoming. You have to get out—now.

Incoming in what form?

Bael.

He swore profanely. Are you and Ulfur away from here?

I wanted badly to tell him that he needed to come rescue me, but knew he had enough on his plate with the remaining wrath demon. We’re . . . fine, I lied. Where’s Diamond? Is she OK?

She hasn’t left the bedroom. Christ!

What?

Just as I thought the words, another unearthly howl tore through the night.

That was close, Alec said, and even several floors away, I could feel his exhaustion.

You killed the demon? Good. Now get the hell out of there before Bael finds you.

I will come to you. Where are you? Are you with Sally?

Yeees, I said slowly. About that—

Stay with her. We will escape with Diamond. Christ, I think he’s here. I will find you as soon as I have Diamond safe.

He shut off communication before I could warn him that Sally wasn’t as benign as he believed. I hesitated to do so with Bael right there about to pounce. “I think we’re on our own for a little bit, Ulfur, while everyone gets away from Bael. You doing all right?”

“Yes,” he answered, his voice pained.

“I don’t suppose you can move?”

“No. I wish I could.”

“You and me both.”

“Cora—”

“Yes?”

He hesitated a few seconds. “I’m sorry that I got you involved in this. With Bael, and being made a Tool. I had no idea there were others outside the exit from Bael’s palace.”

“Well, it’s not like you had a choice in the matter, is it? I mean, didn’t de Marco force you to steal the Tools?”

“Yes,” he said, his voice filled with misery. “But I’m still sorry.”

“And I appreciate that. Don’t be so quick to give up, though. We’ll get through this. First things first—we have to get away from Sally. There’s got to be some way we can knock her out, or blast her with Bael’s power or something. If I could just put my hand on you, I might be able to channel the power through you. . . .”

“There, so much better. I just feel absolutely stark naked if I go out without lipstick,” Sally said as she emerged from the bathroom, fresh as could be. “Now, shall we get going? Lord Bael wants you to be taken to his palace, but the nearest entrance to that is in Paris, and that is a nightmare trip I just don’t even want to think about. My palace, however, has a presence in the form of a lovely little Louis the Fourteenth villa in the town of Privas, which isn’t too far from here. I’ll take you there first, and then we shall proceed to Bael’s Black Palace.”

“We’re going to your villa?” I asked, hope blossoming. “You can’t possibly carry us all that way.”

“Of course not,” she said, laughing.

She’d have to remove the immobility spell. She’d have to let us up to walk, and then . . . I sighed with relief. Then we’d escape. “Well, I have to say, as much fun as it has been being a human blob, I really do welcome the chance to move around. I’m starting to get a cramp in my calf.”

“Oh, I’m not going to be able to take the spell off you,” she told us, making a face that looked as sincere as hell. “You’d try to escape, and Lord Bael would be most angry with me if I let you do that.”

“You just said you couldn’t carry us,” I protested.

“And so I won’t.”

My hopes plummeted. “But then . . . how are you going to get us to your villa? Do you have henchmen like Bael?”

“Thousands of them, but they’re busy wreaking havoc and destruction, so I’ll just have to do this myself.”

To my astonishment, she reached out into the air, and with a jerking motion tore . . . well, tore what I assumed was the fabric of space. It gaped open like the wall of the hotel room was a photograph on a sheet that had been ripped apart, a swirling blackness beyond it.

“Madre de Dios,” I swore, shrieking as Sally, with a strength that belied her tiny little form, grabbed me with both hands and flung me through the rip in space.