Provoke

Chapter Eighteen

Mace

I pulled up outside the motel feeling a little on edge. I had no idea what was going on in her head, especially after the night before. I groaned. Why did I go there? All I’d done was confuse the situation even more. Sleeping with her when she was vulnerable was a low act.

I should have kept my cock in my fucking pants.

I got out of the car and slammed the door. I had my laptop with me, which had everything I knew about Anna’s rape and the people responsible on it. Getting Leet involved was a bad move, but it was the only one I had right now.

“Leet,” I said, rapping on the door. “It’s me.”

“Come in, it’s open.”

I opened the door. My mouth dropped. Holy shit, she was beautiful. She was only wearing sweat pants and a tee shirt, but I wanted to take her off that couch and slam her against the wall. I wanted to feel myself inside of her. Memories of the night before flashed through my mind.

I repositioned the laptop in front of my erection. Her gaze dropped, and she rolled her eyes.

“Okay, firstly, last night: it shouldn’t have happened, and it will not be happening again—at least, not anytime soon. Okay?”

I nodded, only hearing “anytime soon”. My heart pounded as it translated that into I will eventually forgive you.

“We need to look at everything you have so far. What do you know about these guys?” she asked, turning her attention back to her own laptop.

I smiled. She looked so cute when she was concentrating on something. I loved the way her nose scrunched up like that. And how she’d scratch behind her ear when something was bothering her.

“Mace?” she prodded, staring at me.

“Right. Sorry,” I murmured. I sat down and opened my laptop, navigating my way through the files until I found the one I needed. “Okay. I don’t know that much.” It wasn’t that I didn’t know much, it was more that I was all over the place. I had no idea where to go next.

Leeta sighed. “So, tell me what you do know.”

“In the letter Anna left me, there was a name. She suggested he might be able to help me understand. There was no number, just a name. It took me months to track him down. Turns out, for the right amount of cash he was happy to hook me up with the job.”

“So, just like that?” Leeta scrunched her nose. “What’s his angle?”

“What do you mean?” The guy got ten fucking grand out of me. I’d say that was a pretty damn good angle.

“Why would this guy help you, Mace?” She sighed and rubbed her forehead. “People don’t do shit like this without an agenda. You should know that better than anyone.”

I tensed. This was the first time since we’d met that she had made me feel inferior to her. Others had been doing it all along, but Leeta? Never.

“I’m not an idiot, Leet, but what other option do I have right now?” I snapped. “This guy is my only link. He is the only connection I have to this group right now, so excuse me if I’m gonna take it. Besides, all he cared about was the amount of cash I was willing to part with.”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean that. I was just . . . I don’t know.” She let out a breath. Setting her computer down on the coffee table, she sat forward, her arms resting on her knees. “Okay, so what do we know, then?”

“I know there are others. All three clients I had—”

“Three?” she cut in. Her eyes widened. “There’s another video?”

Shit. Oh shit. My mouth opened, and no sound came out.

“Mace, I swear to God, if you don’t—”

“Yes, Leeta, there was a third . . . job. Last Thursday night.”

Her mouth dropped open. She stood up and shook her head, her hands reaching to the back of her neck. “Wow,” she muttered. She turned to face me. “Where is the video?”

“Leet,” I began, already knowing my pleas were hopeless.

“Come on, Mace. You think I want to watch you fucking another woman? Guess what, I don’t! But if we are going to have any chance of finding these guys, then I need to watch that damn fucking video.”

She was right. I knew she was right. I could watch that thing a thousand times and still not see what might be the only clue. Leeta had fresh eyes, and she also had training in this kind of thing.

I located the file and pressed open. Wordlessly, I pushed it down the coffee table to her. What was I supposed to do? I couldn’t sit there while she watched that. I stood up.

“Sit the fuck back down.” My eyebrows shot up. I’d never heard her speak with such authority toward me. “You think you get to leave while I watch this? No fucking way, Mace. You are going to sit there and watch this with me.”

I am?

Crap. I edged over to the couch and joined her.

It had to be the most awkward moment of my life. I groaned internally and covered my face with my hand, disguising it as a scratch. She didn’t need me there; it was her way of punishing me. Not that I didn’t deserve whatever she wanted to give me, but still . . . this was harsh stuff.

“Why is this one awake?” she asked immediately.

I shrugged. “He wanted her lucid. Something about watching her squirm. Seeing her suffer.”

Leeta didn’t respond. She went back to watching me thrust my fingers inside of another woman. I swallowed, knowing there was nothing I could do to take away the awkwardness of this situation. So I sat there and copped it, fidgeting with my fingers, trying to ignore the voice demanding that I ‘stick my cock in her filthy hole.’

Leet stiffened next to me, but she was so determined to act like all this didn’t affect her at all that I struggled myself with how to act? Do I let it go? Apologise again? I shook my head. Nothing I did right now was going to make any difference, except maybe make things worse.

The banging on the door of the motel room scared the shit out of me. Jumping up, I glanced at Leeta.

“Did you tell anyone you were here?” I whispered.

She blushed, standing up. “That’s my friend, Tim.”

My eyes widened. “What the fuck, Leeta? This isn’t a fucking slumber party. You can’t just invite your friends over,” I growled.

She turned around and stomped toward me. “I’m not an idiot, Mace. I thought he might be able to help, you fuckwit. He’s a computer expert. He does shit like . . .” She waved her hand. “I don’t know. He can tell you what he does.”

I followed her to the door, still pissed that she hadn’t thought to bring this up at any time in the past few hours.

“Leeta!”

I didn’t bother hiding my scowl as I watched Leeta embrace a tall, thin dude I could only assume was Tim. He glanced my way and then winked at Leet, who laughed.

“And you must be Mace,” he drawled, swaggering over to me. I put out my hand, accepting that I was going to have to play nice with this guy. He waved my hand away and fell into my arms.

My mouth fell open as I awkwardly patted him on the back. I had not been expecting that. Leeta smothered a laugh and I shot her a look. She knew better than anyone how hard it was for me to open up to people.

I thought back to the last time I’d hugged Dad. It had been awkward, forced, as it normally was. Fuck, a handshake was difficult in my family, let alone a fucking hug.

“We’re going to get along fine.” Tim grinned, pulling away from me. I nodded and smiled at him. It was nothing personal against him, but I didn’t like the guy already. The way he hung all over Leeta made my blood boil. Which was stupid, because he was so obviously gay that he was more likely to hit on me than her.

That didn’t stop me hating how relaxed and comfortable she looked around him. Or how, right then, he could make her smile and I couldn’t.

“Can I get you a drink?” I asked Tim. “Coffee?”

“Sure. Coffee, two sugars and cream, thanks.”

“Leet?” I asked.

“A coffee would be good, thank you.”

I went into the kitchen, their chatter taking a backseat in my mind. I turned on the kettle, leaning against the kitchen counter while I waited for it to boil. If this guy was such a good friend, then how come I was only meeting him now? Was she ashamed of me or something?

Get a grip. You’re losing it.

“. . . so take a look and tell me what you think.”

My head shot up. Surely she wasn’t showing him the fucking video? But she was. Fuck. Was she trying to piss me off? The last thing I needed was this guy getting all judgy on me.

My fingers tapped anxiously on the Laminex bench top as Tim and Leeta hovered over her laptop. I’d watched that damn video so many times by then, it was running in my head as I listened to it. With each second that passed, I was becoming more agitated.

If I stay here, I’m going to do something stupid.

“I’ll be back soon,” I muttered, stalking out the door. I jumped into my car and backed out of the parking lot.

#

I stopped off at Leets to feed the cat, then picked up my bike from my house and headed for work. I just needed to go somewhere to get my mind off things, and the only place I could think to do that was the garage. Finn would be there, and given my less-than-friendly mood at the moment, he would probably ask questions, but that was a risk I was willing to take.

I pulled into the parking lot and got out of the car, slamming the door. How had shit gotten so messed up? I laughed bitterly. I was a Jordan—this was how my life was supposed to be, wasn't it?

"Wasn't expecting you in today." Finn stood near the roller door, attempting to clean grease from his hands with an old rag.

"Yeah, well, things change," I muttered, setting myself up in front of an old Harley that needed an oil change and a service.

“Is everything okay?”

“Why wouldn't it be?” I shrugged.

“I don't know, you just seem a little off,” he said.

I stood up and wiped my brow with my forearm. I could really use a friend to talk to. The guys were my buddies, but it wasn't like we sat around and shared secrets. We’d known each other for years, but it was a case of meet up and relax, play a few games of pool, drink a few beers—typical guy stuff. We didn’t do feelings and shit.

I struggled to open up to Leet, let alone Finn.

“Just having a few problems,” I muttered.

Finn nodded. “Fine, but if you need to talk, I mean, you can tell me anything, yeah?”

“Yeah, thanks man,” I said, smiling awkwardly. The thing was, I couldn’t ask his advice on anything without going into a shitload of detail.

I resumed working on the bike, unsuccessfully trying to keep my mind off Leeta. After busting my third oil filter, Finn shot me a look.

“Dude, maybe you should go home and relax or something.”

“That's the problem. I can't relax.”

“Yeah, well, no offense, but all you’re doing here is breaking shit.”

I threw the spanner down on the ground, wincing as it bounced across the concrete floor. He was right—I fucking knew that—it was just that the last thing I needed was somebody telling me what to do.

Fuck. Maybe I shouldn't be here. I stood up abruptly, sending the milk crate I'd been sitting on flying backwards.

“Fine,” I muttered. “Have it your way. I'm gone.” I ignored Finn’s protests and stormed back out to my bike.

For the next hour or so, I just rode. I was heading nowhere in particular, and it felt good.

Why hadn't I thought of that first?

There was no better way for me to clear my head than on my bike—especially finding an unused back road somewhere, where I could take my helmet off, do a few burnouts, and just let off some steam. This is what I needed. I already felt better.

Parking my bike, I jumped off and sat down on a grassy patch beside it. It was as good a time as any to try and think out my next move. I couldn't think straight around Leeta. Never could. I knew I didn't want her to be any more involved than she already was. If anything happened to her because of me, I’d never forgive myself.

But I also knew how stubborn she could be.

I gripped hold of a few blades of grass between my fingertips, and tugged them from the ground. Lifting my hand above my head, I let the blades fall, watching as they slowly floated towards the ground, not really knowing where they would end up.

That was kind of how I felt—like I was free-falling without a parachute, with no idea how long it was until I hit the ground.

#

I got to my feet and picked up my helmet. I had to get back there. I could put it off facing her for a while, but not forever. The last thing I wanted was to get into another fight. What I wanted was for things to go back to the way they were before—which was ridiculous, considering I'd built our whole relationship around lies.

I shook my head. What she’d ever seen in a fuck-knuckle like me, I would never know.