Silent Killer

Chapter Twenty-three

Jack and Cathy didn’t get much sleep, only taking short naps between lovemaking sessions. They made love as if there were no tomorrow. Each took pleasure and gave it in equal amounts. And when morning came, they showered together and made love again. Cathy tried not to think about the past and tried even harder not to wonder about the future. She wasn’t a seventeen-year-old kid with her head in the clouds and a bunch of foolish dreams in her heart. She was thirty-four, widowed and the mother of a son who would soon turn sixteen. She had somehow survived her husband’s horrific murder, a mental breakdown that nearly destroyed her and a mother and in-laws who had been determined to keep her son from her. Maybe she had been weak and helpless. Maybe she had needed a trial by fire, so to speak, to harden her into a mature woman. All she knew was that she would never again allow other people to make her decisions and tell her what to do. Whatever she had with Jack this time around, be it sex or love or a combination of the two, she wanted it. If their relationship turned out to be a short affair, so be it. And if it became more…

Jack came up behind her, wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed her neck. She squirmed against him.

“Go sit down,” she told him. “The pancakes are almost ready.”

“How about I pour us both a cup of coffee?” He released her and reached out to retrieve two mugs from the overhead cupboard.

“Thanks. And while you’re being my helper, get the syrup out and put it on the table. I’ve got two kinds. Plain pancake syrup and blueberry flavored. The blueberry is Seth’s favorite.”

“How about that. It’s my favorite, too. One more thing your son and I have in common.”

Cathy flipped the four large pancakes on the griddle before replying. “What else do you and Seth have in common?” She tried her best to keep her voice calm and even.

“You,” Jack replied. “You’re important to both of us. You’re his mom, and you’re my…You’re my what? Girlfriend? Lover?”

Cathy breathed a sigh of relief. “I like the sound of both. How about girlfriend in public and lover in private?”

“So you’re okay with my referring to you in public as my girlfriend?” He popped her on the butt before he poured their coffee.

“Yes, I’m okay with it, just as long as I can call you my boyfriend.” She giggled. “God, we sound like a couple of kids, don’t we.”

He set their full mugs on the table, and then searched the cupboards for the syrup. “How do you think your in-laws will feel about your dating me?”

“I’m sure they’d prefer that I date Donnie Hovater.”

“Yeah, I’m sure they would.”

Cathy flipped the pancakes onto two plates, turned off the griddle and carried the plates over to the table. “I prefer you.” She set the plates on the table. “I like Donnie, but he doesn’t put butterflies in my stomach or make me shiver when he touches me or-”

Jack yanked her into his arms, nuzzled her neck and then he lifted his head and stared into her eyes. “In case there’s any doubt in your mind, I’m crazy about you, honey.”

She wrapped her arms around his neck, stood on tiptoe, gave him a quick kiss and said, “I’m crazy about you, too.”

His smile vanished. “Sooner or later, we’ll have to talk about it, you know. About the past. Our past together and our separate pasts.”

“Not now. Not yet.”

“No, not yet, but someday soon.”

Yes, someday soon, she would have to tell him why she had married Mark Cantrell. But did she dare tell him the truth?

Seth stopped outside the kitchen when he heard his grandmother mention his mother’s name. What was she doing here so early in the morning? Grandmother lived nearby and often dropped in unexpectedly, but seldom for breakfast. He stood quietly by the closed door and listened.

“You seem terribly upset, Elaine,” Mona said. “Why don’t you sit down and let me get you some coffee.”

“Didn’t you hear me? I just got off the phone with Gayle Laney. She lives across the street from Cathy.”

“Yes, dear, I heard you, but when I asked if Cathy was all right, you said that she was, so why are you so upset?”

“Where’s J.B.?”

“He’s shaving.”

“I don’t know if we dare tell him about this.”

“About what?”

“Gayle was doing what she believed was her Christian duty,” Elaine said. “She’s not a busybody, and she even said it was none of her business, but she thought, as Cathy’s mother, I should know.”

“For goodness sakes, know what?”

“That there was a strange car-a Corvette-parked in Cathy’s driveway all night.”

“Was there?”

“You don’t seem shocked.”

“Should I be?”

“Yes, you should be. The car belonged to Jackson Perdue. Of all men, Jack Perdue!”

“Lower your voice,” Mona suggested. “I think you’re right about our not telling J.B. It would only upset him.”

“Aren’t you upset? I certainly am. By lunchtime today, the whole town will know that Cathy had an overnight visitor. I don’t think we can keep this from J.B. for very long.”

“Perhaps not, but I’d prefer you let me tell him when it becomes necessary,” Mona said.

“I don’t know where I went wrong with that girl. I did my best to bring her up the right way, but-”

“This Jack Perdue, he’s the boy Cathy was in love with when she was a teenager, isn’t he?”

Silence.

Seth needed to hear his grandmother’s answer.

“Yes,” Elaine said so quietly that Seth barely heard her. “He was wrong for her then, and he’s wrong for her now.”

“That isn’t your decision to make, is it?”

Elaine gasped. “You can’t possibly approve of-”

“It’s not my place to approve or disapprove of Cathy’s decision.”

“Don’t you think her having an affair with Jack Perdue will adversely affect all our lives, especially Seth’s?”

“Seth is nearly sixteen. He’s not a child. He has to know that it would be wrong for Cathy to spend the rest of her life mourning Mark.”

“You’re far more understanding of my daughter’s human frailties than most mothers-in-law would be.”

“I love Cathy. She was very good to my son and…and she gave us a grandchild when I’d given up hope of ever…Elaine, if she loves this man, she has every right to be with him.”

His mom had been in love with Jack Perdue when she’d been a teenager, before she’d married his dad. And now she might be in love with him again. Seth wasn’t sure how he felt about his mom being with another man. He’d thought maybe she would start dating Brother Hovater. He kind of reminded him of his dad. He guessed it was selfish of him to wish that his mom wouldn’t date anybody, that she’d stay true to his dad forever.

Yeah, that was stupid. His father was dead. His mother was still a fairly young woman. It was only natural that she’d want to get married again and maybe have more kids.

But why did the guy have to be Jackson Perdue?

Why not? What was wrong with Jack?

“Since we don’t seem to be very busy this morning, I’m going to take my break,” Lorie told Cathy. “And unless we’re swamped with customers, I may try to catch up on the bookkeeping.”

“Go ahead,” Cathy said. “I think I can hold down the fort.” She glanced around at their entirely empty shop.

Lorie laughed. “Are you sure you have the energy to even stay awake?” She lowered her voice. “Going at it hot and heavy all night with the golden god had to have taken a lot out of you.”

Grinning shyly, Cathy motioned for Lorie to hush. “Stop that. You don’t know who might walk in and overhear you.”

“Oh, sweetie, if you think half the town doesn’t already know that Jack’s Vette was parked in your driveway all night, then you’re far more naive than I thought you were.”

Cathy huffed, hating to admit that Lorie was right. “I know, and I’m dreading having to deal with what my mother is going to say and how J.B. and Mona will react.”

“It’s none of their damn business. Tell them that.”

“I just might do it. But if Seth finds out that-”

The tinkling chime hanging over the front door jingled, alerting them that a customer had just entered the store. Both of them glanced at the door. Cathy’s heart sank.

“I’ll leave you two alone,” Lorie whispered and hurried off toward the back storeroom.

Cathy faced her son. She could tell just by looking at him that Seth was upset, and she had a pretty good idea why.

“Good morning. I’m surprised to see you here. I thought you were still grounded,” Cathy said.

“I am, but Nana gave me permission to come see you. She dropped me off and told me she’d pick me up when I called her.”

“That was very nice of Mona.”

“Is it true?” Seth demanded.

“Is what true?”

“Did Jackson Perdue spend the night with you?”

This was what she had dreaded far more than a confrontation with either her mother or her in-laws. Despite being six feet tall and thinking he was grown, Seth was still just a boy on the verge of manhood. As far as she knew, he was still a virgin. Actually, she’d bet money on it. How could she explain to him about his mother having sex with a man who wasn’t her husband?

An old adage instantly came to mind. Honesty is the best policy.

“Yes, Jack spent the night with me.”

“You do know that everybody in town is talking about it, don’t you? Some neighbor of yours called Grandmother this morning, and she couldn’t wait to come over and tell Nana.”

“Gossip travels fast, especially juicy gossip.”

“I don’t like my mother being gossiped about that way.”

“I’m sorry if Jack spending the night with me has caused you any embarrassment, but what I do in my personal life is nobody’s business.”

“It’s my business. You’re my mother.”

“Yes, I’m your mother and I love you, and because of those two facts, I’d prefer to have your approval. Jack and I are going be seeing a lot of each other. We’re officially dating.”

“Dating. Is that what you call it? He spent the night.”

“Yes, he did.”

“You had sex, didn’t you?”

“Yes, we did.”

Groaning, Seth shook his head, then turned from her and forked his fingers through his thick brown hair. “What if I said that I don’t want you seeing him again?” He lifted his gaze hesitantly.

She looked right at him. “I love you more than anything, Seth. I’d do anything for you, but you’re a fifteen-year-old boy. You’re the child, and I’m the adult. I have no intention of allowing you to issue orders to me, to tell me who I can and cannot date.”

“Yeah, well, go ahead and date whoever you damn well please, but don’t expect me to like it. I thought I wanted to come live with you, but if he’s going to be around all the time, I might change my mind and stay with Granddaddy and Nana.”

So there it was, the thing she had feared the most. Her own son was blackmailing her to get his way. The thought of losing him to his grandfather unnerved her, but she could not allow him to get away with bullying her. She had walked that path with her mother and her father-in-law and even sometimes with Mark. She wanted her son to be a better person, to be the man she knew he could be.

“I want you to live with me,” she told him, keeping her voice far calmer than she felt. “But if you prefer to stay with your grandparents, then that’s what you should do. Jack and I are going to be seeing quite a bit of each other. I don’t know what the future holds for us, but he and I have a right to find out.” She searched Seth’s eyes, hoping to see even a glimmer of understanding. “I have a right to be happy, don’t I?”

“Does he make you happy?”

“Yes, he does. He makes me very happy.”

“I heard Nana ask Grandmother if he was the guy you were in love with when you were a teenager. Grandmother said he was and that he was wrong for you then and he’s still wrong for you. Were you in love with him before you married Dad?”

“Yes. Jack was my first love.” And my first lover.

“Did you love him more than you loved Dad?”

“Oh, Seth.”

“Did you?”

“I loved Mark in a different way.”

“Did Dad know about him?”

“Yes, Mark knew all about Jack, just as I knew all about his first wife. Your father and I didn’t have any secrets from each other.”

Seth stood there, sulky and quiet, his eyes wide and an angry flush on his cheeks. “Does Jack Perdue mean more to you than I do?”

“No one means more to me than you do. Don’t you know that?”

“But you do love him, don’t you?”

“I don’t know. Maybe. We’re just getting to know each other again.”

“Does he love you?”

“I don’t know. I don’t think even he knows for sure.”

“He could wind up hurting you. He could break your heart.”

“Yes, he could. And I could break his heart, too.” We did that to each other years ago, and there are no more guarantees now than there had been then. “It’s a risk you take when you go into a relationship, when you open yourself up to care about someone. I think maybe you might know a little something about that.”

“Huh?” He looked at her with a puzzled expression on his face.

“Am I wrong about your liking Missy Hovater?”

“Jeez, Mom, Missy and I are just friends.”

“But you’d like for there to be more between you, and if it doesn’t work out and she starts dating someone else, it’s going to break your heart just a little, isn’t it? You’re taking a chance by liking Missy. That’s what I’m doing with Jack. I’m taking a chance that in the end, we’ll feel the same way about each other.”

Seth stared at her, and for a moment she wasn’t sure she’d gotten through to him. Then suddenly she noticed a change in his expression.

“You don’t care that everybody knows?” Seth asked. “I mean, you were a preacher’s wife and here you are having sex outside of marriage. Granddad’s going to call that fornication.”

“Granddad can call it whatever he wants to call it,” Cathy said. “And no, I don’t care if everybody in town knows that I’m sleeping with Jack Perdue. Who I have sex with is no one else’s business. Not even yours.”

Seth swallowed. “Yeah, maybe you’re right. I don’t know. It’s just that I wish…I wish…” He turned from her, and she knew he was on the verge of crying.

She walked over to him, placed her hand on his shoulder and asked, “What do you wish?”

“I wish my dad were still alive. I wish he hadn’t died. I wish we were still a family. How stupid is that? Wishing for the impossible.”

Cathy wrapped her arms around her son and hugged him. “It’s not stupid at all. And if I could bring Mark back to us, I would. But I can’t. And we both have to find a way to go on without him. We have to build a new life for ourselves.”

“And that new life includes Jack Perdue, at least for you.”

“Maybe. And if that happens, I hope you’ll give Jack a chance to be a part of your life, too.”

Seth pulled away from her. “I’m not making any promises.”

“I don’t expect you to. Just be the wonderful, kindhearted and caring young man I know that you are. That’s all I ask.”

“If he hurts you, he’ll have to answer to me.”

Cathy barely managed to stop herself from smiling. How very sweet that Seth saw himself as her protector. Her heart sighed. She hadn’t lost him. He was still her son.

And in time…