Slave to Sensation

CHAPTER 26

Lucas didn’t growl, didn’t act territorial. She was his and this was part of what the pack would need from her. Touch. Love. Affection. Sometimes the best way to give affection to the strongest males was with a simple kiss. They’d accept that when they might reject words of care. How she knew that was a mystery to her.

As she drew back, she felt a stab in her heart. Dorian was looking at her as if she belonged, as if he was sure of her, as if she was Pack. She was. For the next couple of months. Until she dragged Lucas down with her into unconsciousness and death.

“That’s not everything,” Hawke said, when she turned to him again. “We made sure they knew we’re aware of violence in the Psy populace. Enrique confessed quite prettily on camera. Liked to talk.”

“They can’t have that getting out.” Sascha watched her mate walk toward her and felt something low and hot in her tighten. Anger was no barrier against the passion he could arouse in her. “Silence would be deemed a failure.”

“Maybe that would be a good thing,” Tamsyn said.

“Only if there’s something to take its place. To spread this information without having any way to manage the fallout would be irresponsible.” She shook her head.

“This big a Shockwave could cripple thousands of innocents. When something happens on the psychic plane, it has physical effects.” She knew that too well. Nothing had prepared her for the agony she’d suffered.

Lucas walked around to her back and hugged her against him. “I wonder how they’ll explain your presence out of the Net?”

“We suggested they tell people a difference in her mind made her susceptible to mating with a changeling and that was how she dropped out.” Hawke shrugged. “Doesn’t matter to us so long as they don’t touch her.”

“It’s going to shake things up regardless of how they do it.” Lucas’s arms were solid muscle around her. Nothing had ever felt as good.

Sascha knew the leopards and wolves had achieved the impossible—they’d leashed the Council. It was a bittersweet victory.

The wolves asked Sascha to come to their hideout three days later, bare minutes after she’d finished speaking with Nikita. Her mother had informed her that she’d been officially cut off from the Duncan family group.

“You’re no longer Psy. Your mind is too flawed. It couldn’t even hold on to the link with the PsyNet. Obviously, you were never meant to be a part of it.”

So that was how the Council was spinning it. “No, Mother. I’m perfect.”

Nikita didn’t blink. “The deal with DarkRiver—we’d like it to continue. Lucas Hunter’s odd… connection with you is why we allowed you to leave the Net. One flawed Psy wasn’t worth destroying business ties with the cats and the wolves.”

Sascha got the message. Business was something every Psy could understand. “We have no problem honoring the deal.” Then she ended the call and let herself cry.

Lucas held her and when the wolves sent for her, he didn’t try to stop her from doing what she had to do.

“Brenna’s dying,” Hawke said the second they entered the tunnels.

Sascha thought of the incredibly powerful will she’d touched once in the darkness. “No.” She refused to let that light go out. “Take me to her.”

Brenna lay in a soft bed covered by a cerulean blue blanket. Tamsyn and another woman, who Sascha assumed was the SnowDancer healer, stood talking quietly in one corner of the bedroom. Tammy’s eyes pleaded with her to do something.

Making a silent promise, Sascha looked back at Brenna. Her hair had been cut brutally short, as if someone had tried to rob her of her femininity. Bruises covered her face and ringed her neck, but Sascha didn’t see all that. What she saw was the flickering candle of Brenna’s mind.

She cupped her healer’s hands around that flame. Don’t give up now, Brenna.

Silence.

You know me. I won’t hurt you.

You lied. A whispery accusation.

When?

You said Pack would come for me. Pain and betrayal. But I’m alone.

Sascha blinked and looked to Hawke. “Was she conscious when you found her?”

“No. The human medics said they couldn’t do anything for her so we brought her home.” Human medics because none of them trusted the M-Psy anymore.

“She doesn’t know she’s home. Talk to her. Touch her.”

The wolf didn’t argue. Walking to the bed, he began to caress Brenna’s bruised face with disarming gentleness, reminding her of nothing so much as a father with his child. Brenna’s two brothers moved to join him, one taking her hand, the other kneeling down beside the bed to stroke her spiky hair. There was something heartbreaking about seeing three predatory males, used to protecting their women, trying to be strong while their souls were being torn to pieces.

Inside the darkness of Brenna’s mind, Sascha whispered, You’re home, Brenna.

It’s a lie.

Can’t you feel them? Hawke, Riley, Andrew… they’re here and they’re waiting for you.

A silence so full of terrified hope that Sascha shivered.

They found you. They avenged your honor. She was mated to an alpha Hunter. She knew the value of vengeance, the importance of honor, the power of loyalty. Don’t make them wait any longer—I think their hearts are going to break.

I can’t bear any more. Tears sounded in every word. What if this is a dream, you’re a dream, and I wake to him? I might never escape again and I’m so tired.

Sascha thought about who Brenna had been before Enrique, about who she still was deep in her soul. She thought of Rina and Mercy, of their will, their pride. You have so much heart it humbles me and you fought a brave fight. If you want to slip into the last sleep, no one will judge you. You’ve earned your peace.

I don’t want to die.

Then choose to live. Sascha wasn’t playing games. She’d told the absolute truth—Brenna had earned her right to die. We miss you.

Who are you?

I’m Sascha, mate to Lucas Hunter and a healer of DarkRiver. She was no longer a woman who belonged nowhere, no longer part of a race that would’ve punished her for her gift. Pride shimmered in her tone. Accepted, more than accepted by her new family, she’d never mourn who she’d once been.

Sascha, I’m broken.

So was I, Brenna. She reached out and hugged the girl’s floundering spirit. What is broken can be healed.

Help me. The voice was resolute, that flickering flame settling to a slender column of purity. I won’t give in to death. Help me wake up to reality… whatever that might be.

Pride for the young woman’s courage mixed with anguish for the pain she’d suffered, but Sascha let her feel only the pride. I’m here. Slowly, she guided Brenna’s broken mind through the shreds of her spirit.

Can this ever be fixed? Brenna asked, aware of the extent of the damage that had been done to her.

I was born to heal you. And if it took every second of the remainder of her time on this Earth, she would heal Brenna.

Take me home, Sascha.

Sascha opened her eyes perhaps an hour after she’d spoken to Hawke, and found herself sitting on the bed beside Brenna, her hand in the young woman’s. She had no recollection of moving there, or of clasping her other hand with Lucas’s. Brenna’s brothers and Hawke surrounded the bed, touching their packmate wherever they could.

“Wake up, Brenna.” Sascha brushed a gentle kiss on her forehead. As she sat back up, the girl’s eyelids fluttered and then opened. Wary eyes met Sascha’s. With a smile, Sascha said, “Hey, sleepyhead.”

Brenna blinked. One of her brothers choked back a cry and pushed in front of Sascha to cup his sister’s face with hands that were consciously gentle. “Bren? God damn it, Bren, you had us worried to death.”

Over the top of Riley’s head, Sascha met brown eyes filled with so much joy it was almost blinding. She got off the bed and let Lucas hold her. Now it was time for the wolves to heal Brenna, to cover her in their love and affection. Sascha would return to help her repair her mind and soul, but for today, this was enough.

“Let’s go home,” she said to Lucas.

He ran his knuckles down her cheek and dropped a kiss on her nose. “Still mad, Sascha darling?”

“Yes.” Her hug was fierce. She lived with guilt every day of her life for condemning him to death.

A week later, she picked up Julian and rubbed his belly. The little cub growled and asked for more. Laughing, she gave him what he wanted. Tammy was out of town for the day and when she’d asked Sascha to look after the cubs, she’d jumped at the chance. They’d turned up at Lucas’s lair as two adorable boys in blue jeans and T-shirts, but minutes later, she’d found two cubs chewing on her boots.

“You look like you’re enjoying yourself,” Lucas said from the doorway, a strained smile on his face.

She knew the reason for the strain. It was her. She was so angry with him for what he’d done and he felt it. How could he not? He was bonded with her. She watched him pick up Roman and let the cub claw playfully at his T-shirted chest, and knew she had to give up the anger.

How long did they have left? One month, maybe two. Her man was extraordinary and he knew how to love, how to feel, how to fight for his mate with every emotion he had in him. If he hadn’t fought so hard, if he hadn’t forced her hand, he wouldn’t be the man she adored so hopelessly.

“I love you, Lucas,” she whispered.

His eyes turned cat-green. “No more claws, kitten?”

She shook her head. “I’m so glad for you.”

He looked like he wanted to walk over and kiss her till she begged for mercy. Except they had two squirming cubs in their arms. Looking at each other, they started to laugh. Started to live.

That night, she asked him to change for her. Without a word, he stripped off his clothing and the world turned into a multicolored shimmer. It was so beautiful, she felt her heart stop. She blinked and when she opened her eyes, a huge hunting cat lay on the bed beside her.

Despite the fact that she knew this was Lucas, she was a little scared. But not enough to miss the chance. Holding her breath, she ran her fingers through his silky black fur. There was nothing she could compare the sensation to. Bonded as they were, she’d felt him run, felt his joy in the wind and the forests, felt the panther just… be. But never had she touched the animal in him so intimately.

When he made a sound that was incredibly close to a purr, she started to laugh. “You like being petted whether you’re in human or panther form.”

The panther snapped his teeth at her and, under her hands, light shimmered. Heart in her throat, she remained perfectly immobile until Lucas lay naked beside her, the exotic tattoo on his upper arm a reminder of the wildness within. “Wow.”

“Of course. I’m the most beautiful creature you’ve ever seen.” A smug smile.

Laughing, she let him tease her, let him teach her how to grasp the moment, how to love without fear or guilt, how to just be.

“Something’s wrong,” she said to him a month later.

He put his hand on her breast under the sheet and threw one leg over hers. “What?” His voice was a purr in the darkness.

Already, her body was heating up for his. “I’ve never felt better. You’re the same. Every single physical symptom I had is gone and I don’t think they’re going to reappear.”

“That’s a problem?” His amusement was obvious. On her breast, his hand moved in easy circles.

She let her senses surrender, melting for him. “I’m serious. You shouldn’t be able to keep my mind… fed, and function so well yourself.”

He stopped caressing her and slid his hand down to her ribs. She knew he’d heard the seriousness in her tone. “Do you think it’s the calm before the storm?”

“No. It should be a gradual drain.” She stared up at the ceiling, where leaves crawled across the space. Lucas had no problem with the forest taking over his home and she was starting to accept it, too, though she did get the occasional urge to make everything spotless. “Will you mind if I go searching in our minds?” It was the first time she’d asked for that since that initial moment of utter unity.

“You know everything there is to know, kitten.”

“I’m not sorry Tammy told me,” she said, mutinous. They’d finally talked about his family several days ago and she’d held her Hunter as he remembered. Those wounds were scars but not the kind that twisted—his scars had a place on his soul. They were a marker of those he’d lost.

He growled against her neck and rubbed the stubble of his beard on her sensitive skin. “I didn’t think so. The two of you are too damn close.” There was no anger in him. “Search.”

Taking a deep bream, she closed her eyes and unconsciously shifted her body until she was almost covered by him. Body and mind in tune. When she opened her mind’s eye on the psychic level and peeked out, she didn’t see the starry plane she was used to. Nor did she see empty darkness. Instead, she saw a web. At the center of the web was Lucas’s light, so bright it was like a cardinal’s but somehow more pure, more intense, hot instead of cold.

His light was being showered upon by rainbow-colored sparks and she knew that was her. She wanted to smile. She was doing what she’d always said she would if set free-infecting everyone around her. However, she now understood that the rainbow sparks healed. It was their lack in the PsyNet that had turned the Psy so cruel, so unable to see right from wrong.

Every part of the web glimmered with color.

Web.

“How can there be a web with only two?” she said out loud.

Lucas nuzzled her neck and ran his hands down her body, keeping her anchored with nothing but touch. She stroked her own hands down the heated silk of his back as she followed the strands of the web.

At the end of one filament blazed a light somehow feminine in feel, and yet, it also held hints of martial strength. At the end of another two were solid masculine stars, brilliant enough to burn.

One of those masculine stars had another strand of the web tracing out from it. At the end of that was a gentle, beautiful flame that spoke of purest love. Amazingly, that light had two small glowing beacons tracing from it. The strands from those two linked back to the male star.

Another strand led from Lucas to a light that was bruised and battered, but slowly being healed by the rainbows that crept in when the mind wasn’t looking. And the last light, it was somehow unique, golden and wild, pure like Lucas’s but tantalizingly different.

“You’re connected to five others,” she whispered.

“Of course,” he muttered against her neck. “The sentinels take a blood oath.”

Shock had her eyes snapping wide open. Mercy, a soldier female. Clay and Nate, pure strength. It was Nate’s line that was joined by another’s—Tamsyn, his mate. Dorian, broken but healing. Vaughn, jaguar not leopard. She searched more carefully for her own cardinal star.

There she was, enclosed within Lucas’s light, the rainbow showers bursting through him to the outside. It didn’t hurt him. In fact, it seemed to make him stronger, as if she were repairing the tiniest of fissures. It didn’t mean he didn’t feel negative emotions, only that he was able to see past them.

“Lucas,” she said, pushing at his shoulders until he got up and looked down at her with those hunting-cat eyes.

“What’s wrong?” His body tensed.

“Nothing,” she whispered, starting to shudder. “Nothing. Everything’s perfect!”

“Kitten, you’re scaring me.” He leaned down to kiss her. “What did you see?”

“You’re part of a network, Lucas. The feedback you give me is bolstered by the sentinels and Tamsyn.”

He thought for a moment. “The blood oath links the sentinels to me on a psychic level?”

“Somehow,” Sascha said. “I don’t understand how—nobody has ever seen this before—the Psy don’t know changelings can link this way.” Part of her wanted to share the exciting discovery, but a bigger part of her wanted to keep it secret, a weapon unlike any other. “You didn’t know?”

“No. I knew the sentinels gave me their loyalty but we’re not Psy.”

“You have Psy potential. Everyone does. Don’t forget—we all started with the same basic material.” She frowned. “Sienna Lauren was right.”

“Why is Tamsyn in the net?” Lucas asked, and then answered his own question. “She’s linked to Nate through the mating bond. The cubs?”

“They’re there, too.”

“Why aren’t parents and siblings?”

“I’m guessing but I’d say that parents aren’t because those are bonds we break as we grow older. We love but we’re no longer as intertwined. The cubs will likely drop out as they age.” She frowned. “Maybe sibling bonds aren’t strong enough? From what I see, it’s only mating bonds and the blood oath that work.”

“I can understand that. Mating is psychic on some level. The blood oath—well, I guess there’s a reason it’s been passed down through the centuries.”

She looked again at the web and her hands clenched on Lucas’s biceps. “The Laurens were wrong on one point.”

“What?”

“This is amazing! Though I’m the solitary Psy, there is a multiplication effect. Our web is bursting with energy.” She couldn’t work out how but now she had a lifetime to figure it out.

They were both quiet for a long while.

“Sascha, what does this mean?”

“We’re safe,” she whispered, barely believing it. “Seven adult minds are feeding the web… giving me what I need. It’s more than enough.”

Lucas clasped her to his chest, rolling over on his back. “Are you sure?”

“Yes.” She kissed his chest, his neck, his chin. “Yes! Thank you for being so damn stubborn.”

He didn’t return the caresses, holding her so tightly she could barely breathe. “You almost killed yourself for no reason.”

“No, Lucas.” She squeezed him back. “I lived because of you. That’s how I’ll always remember it.”

“It’s going to take me a long time to forgive you.” Sascha wanted to cry in joy. “We’ve got forever.”