Texas Rain

CHAPTER 22

Rainey curled beneath her covers and smiled. She'd enjoyed the evening. Travis wasn't a man who talked much, but he seemed to have made an effort at dinner, telling about his plans for the future. Now and then his questions had been too direct about her past and she ignored them, but he didn't seem to mind.

He told her about the time when he'd been a boy and his brothers had ridden the ranch borders firing at anyone who rode onto their land. He'd laughed saying that he'd been such a poor shot then that it would have been a miracle if he'd hit anything, but those trying to invade their property didn't know. He said they'd only been twelve, ten, and six, but the three had formed a bond that year. They had become men.

He'd also told her why he thought the barmaids might be in trouble. If Seth Norman came in to visit his girl, Whiny just might be caught in the crossfire. There was enough money on the Norman brothers' heads to make some men foolish enough to try and collect the bounty.

In her tiny bedroom she closed her eyes, almost still hearing Travis's rich voice. No matter what they were talking about, she caught herself staring at his mouth and wondering what it would be like to kiss him once more.

She wished she'd come from a family like his, strong and honest. Her father never fought for anything except for more money. In fact, he'd given her, his only child, away just because he didn't want to bother with her anymore. Most of her life she'd felt as if she hadn't been important enough for him to even talk to. If he wanted her to do something, he'd say to her mother, "Tell the girl to do this," and if she didn't act fast enough, he blamed his wife by yelling something like, "Your daughter's as slow as she is plain!"

But Rainey would show him. She'd make her own way in the world. She'd grown up hearing her father remind her mother that she'd be starving on the streets without him. Now he must think the same of his daughter. But she wasn't starving. She had a business and she was making it just fine without him.

Voices drifted up from the alley. The drunk who stumbled out of one of the saloons every night to relieve himself swore against heaven because angels must have come down and moved the privy again.

A man sleeping a few doors down yelled for him to be quiet.

The drunk threatened to kill the man if he would only show himself.

Rainey laughed.

Then Snort's voice sounded from almost directly below Rainey's window demanding that they both be quiet.

Rainey leaned closer and waited, for if Snort were on the back porch it wouldn't be long before Whiny showed up also.

Sure enough, the younger woman's drawl drifted up to the window. "There ain't enough men in tonight to keep me in smokes, much less beer."

"It's the weather, getting colder, makes folks want to huddle down in their own beds and sleep till spring." Whiny mumbled her agreement and Snort continued. "I'm thinking of turning in early. I already got my bed bricks warming by the fire in the kitchen." She laughed. "I could use a little beauty sleep."

"Haskell won't let you leave early. I heard him say he's expecting somebody important to come by in the next few evenings. Says some fellow is going to get him a great deal of money."

Snort sounded interested. "We'll keep our eyes open. When Haskell gets the money, that's when we should make our move. I've been thinking about it. We got to hit him before he puts it in the safe 'cause we'll never get that thing open."

"But we'll be caught. I just know we will," Whiny whimpered. "How are we going to look invisible in that little office of Haskell's? If he even thinks we're planning something, he'll beat us to death, then throw us out with the trash."

"All we got to do is get our hands on the money. Look at it this way, we works for Haskell. Any money he gets belongs to us, too. We just got to be brave for once and take it."

"There ain't no way."

"Yes, there is. I'm working on something he'll never see coming. By the time they find his body we'll be long gone, and we'll have enough to live in style for the rest of our lives. If Haskell says big money is coming in, this may be our one chance. All we got to do is kill one man. That ain't much, 'cause he ain't much of a man."

The women talked on and Rainey listened for details, but they changed the subject.

Whiny said, "Wish that big fellow would come in again tonight. He bought us a whole bottle of whiskey and didn't ask for nothing in return."

"He's got Indian blood in him, I'll bet." Snort sounded as if she were drinking during her break. "That dark hair and brown eyes marks him as breed."

"I don't care as long as he's got money. Half the folks in Texas are mixed blood," Whiny answered. "Long as he don't try to scalp me, he can warm my bed."

"You scared him off," Snort scolded. "With men like him you got to act like a lady. Didn't you notice how polite he was? His clothes were clean, too. A man like that has to be handled differently than most. He thinks you're a tramp and he's going to toss you aside."

"I didn't do nothin'!"

Snort continued. "You showed him too much of the merchandise."

Rainey giggled, guessing who they were talking about. Travis had already told her he'd met them. Now she knew he also bought them a bottle of whiskey.

"I did not," Whiny answered. "He said he was out of money. That's why he left."

"He weren't out of money. Didn't you get a look at those boots he had on? Those are handmade of prime leather down in San Antonio just for him. I've seen a few pair of them before. They say the cobbler makes one boot for each foot, not both just alike the way most boots come. I've heard ranchers say they don't have to wear a boot six months to break it in when it's made like that. Any man who can afford them kind of boots don't run out of money."

"You mean he paid for someone to make a pair just for him?" Whiny obviously didn't believe Snort.

"Yeah, and you can bet they slide up his leg almost to his knee and got his name on the inside. If he ever comes in again, we got to ask Haskell to send over some of the special whiskey. Two drinks of it and he'll be acting like he's had a bottle."

"But Haskell charges us for that stuff."

"It'll be worth ten times what we have to pay. When the big man wakes up in your bed, he'll never remember what a great time he had, but he'll pay up all the same."

Whiny giggled. "I wouldn't mind having a peep at what that one looks like without his clothes."

"He's fine, I bet, but I'm guessing he's also picky about his women, not like some. He probably selects his women with twice the care he picked those boots."

Someone yelled from inside and the women shuffled back to work. Rainey lay awake thinking of everything they'd said. She now knew that they planned to kill Haskell, but what bothered her more was that they planned to trick Travis.

She sat up in bed trying to think. They could have been talking about someone else. But Travis had been in there last night. He was a big man and probably had plenty of money. It all seemed to fit Travis, except for the boots. She'd never thought to look at what kind of boot he wore. He must have had something on his feet, but most of the time they talked they were sitting at a table, or walking in the dark.

It was almost midnight and she remained wide awake. She'd never be able to sleep, worrying about Travis. Tomorrow was Monday and she had to go to Judge Gates's office the first thing. Travis had left her without making any plans to see her tomorrow, so she might have no way of passing on what she'd heard. Haskell must be expecting Seth Norman to show up. That had to be where his sudden fall of money was coming from.

Travis had commented that he would be sitting before a panel of lawyers to answer questions.

She couldn't go to the saloon and head him off tomorrow night. She might be too late, and that street was definitely not safe for a woman alone at night. She couldn't just stand around waiting for him to come by.

Rainey crawled out of bed and began to pace. She could write him a note. When they'd walked earlier, he'd told her that he and Sage were staying at the home of the Baileys, who lived just across the street from the capital. He'd even pointed in the general direction. She could find the house and deliver a note tonight, then he'd be prepared and know about both Haskell's plan to collect the reward on Seth Norman and the barmaids' plot to drug him. If he knew he was walking into a trap the next time he went to the saloon, they'd never be able to trick him.

Rainey pulled the ragged old clothes she'd worn when she'd ridden into Austin from the bottom of her tiny chest. The capital was only three blocks away. She could run to it, walk about the square, and find the home of the Baileys. If they rented out rooms, it must be a big house, and most of the big houses in this town had the family name on the door.

She'd find the place, slip a note to Travis under the door, and be back in her bed in minutes. As she pulled her hair up under her floppy old hat, she thought of the distance between the laundry room window and the street. She'd never made the journey alone.

This time she'd have to make it not only alone, but invisible. The only way she'd be safe was to pass through the streets unnoticed. She'd done it the first time running away from a marriage and a life she didn't want. She'd do it this time to save a friend.

She glanced in the mirror. In the weeks she'd been in Austin, she'd gained a little weight. She didn't look as much like a boy as she had when she'd been starving most of the time. But it was a moonless night and she would pass. Who would be on the streets to see her?

Only criminals and outlaws and murderers, she answered her own question. But she had to help Travis if she could. She'd never forgive herself if Whiny and Snort tricked him and she could have stopped them. Plus, if they thought he had money, they might decide killing him could be their ticket out of town. Travis had said Sage came to shop, so he might be carrying more money than usual.

Rainey scribbled the note to Travis, shoved it deep into her shirt pocket, and tiptoed down the back stairs. Even Mamie, who always worked late, had gone to bed. Rainey opened the laundry room window and slipped out, then put a stick at the frame so the window wouldn't close completely. She was out into the alley before she remembered that without the stool she wouldn't be able to crawl back inside.

Slipping into the night, she decided to worry about that later. The odds were good that she'd never make it back alive, so she didn't want to worry about something needlessly.

The air hung cold and still. Rainey moved slowly, keeping to the blackness close to the buildings. She'd looked down the alley several times from her window, and, when the moon was full, she'd noticed where the drunks slept. She only hoped they were in the same places and she didn't step on one.

Inch by inch she tiptoed along the alley until finally she reached the street. From there she turned north and crossed to the boardwalk. Here there were street lamps, but no one around. She could hear the faint sounds from the bars a few blocks over, but on these streets lined with shops and offices, nothing moved.

She crossed one intersection, and then another. The lanterns from the new capital building came into view. Rainey moved toward them.

A wagon rattled down the street and she slipped into the shadows until it passed. The driver looked like he was asleep on the bench and letting the horses lead him home.

She hurried on until she reached the fine houses. The expensive women's boardinghouse was on the corner of the first block. She saw a candle shining from one of the upstairs windows. One of the women might still be awake, but the rest of the house was dark.

A few homes later she found a red stone house with the name Bailey on a plaque by the front door. As she passed, she noticed light still shining from one wing of the structure. Curiosity got the better of her, and she slipped into a tiny garden area only wide enough for a path leading to the back of the house.

Rainey walked slowly, thinking that, though only a few feet from the street, this would be a beautiful private space in the summer.

A light from the window flickered across the path. Rainey leaned to look in, hoping for a glimpse of what the home might look like inside.

To her shock, Travis sat not three feet from the window. His head was down, but the light still shone on the book he'd been reading. He must have fallen asleep.

She stepped closer and realized the window was open.

The thought that she could slip into his room and leave the note on his book almost made her laugh out loud. Before she had time to reconsider, she tugged the window opening wide enough to slide through. Warmth greeted her and the smell of tea drifted in the air. A fire in the hearth made the room dance in light and shadow off fine furniture and rugs. She tiptoed to the polished desk littered with papers.

Just as she laid the note in the center of his book, Travis said in the low voice of a man very much awake, "Good evening, my little thief. Looking for wine, or just breaking into homes tonight?"

Rainey jumped and would have screamed, but his hand brushed her mouth. "Not a sound, the boy is sleeping."

She fought down the cry that was already halfway up her throat.

He stood, careful not to make a sound, placed his arm about her waist, and pulled her across the room. His strong grip no longer frightened her.

She noticed Duck sleeping on a huge buffalo hide by the fire in what looked more like a drawing room than a bedroom. A bunk had been shoved along the other wall that had windows. The covers on the bed were messed. She guessed that must be where Travis slept, when he slept. From that spot he could watch the boy and still have the fresh air blow across him.

She also noticed papers and books everywhere. He obviously had been studying hard for something, and here she was waking him. No, she corrected, she definitely hadn't awakened him. He'd probably heard her from the time she left the street. He'd only been pretending to sleep, probably trying to figure out just how close she'd come.

They stepped out into a hallway but Travis didn't close the door all the way. He was so close she thought she could hear his heartbeat. "What are you doing here, Rainey?"

Shoving her hat back a few inches, she looked up at him. "I came to warn you. Snort and Whiny are plotting against you. They plan to drug you and take all your money."

His low laughter seemed to rattle from his whole body. "You're worried about two barmaids taking advantage of me? I don't know whether to be flattered that you care enough to risk your life to warn me, or insulted that you think I can't defend myself against those two."

She leaned closer. "Don't you want to know what they've planned?"

"I can guess." He leaned down as he whispered. His warm breath brushed her cheek.

"I wrote it all down."

He made no effort to take the letter as he tugged off her hat. "How could anyone ever think that you're a boy. He'd have to be blind or simple. Dear God, you even smell like a woman."

She straightened. "I didn't fool Martha, but she didn't seem to care. I did, however, fool your whole family. You know, the blind, simple folks you call kin."

He laughed at her insult as he touched her hair. "It's amazing how your hair tangles in curls. When you're not around I can't sleep for thinking about touching it."

She backed away, bumping into the wall. "I didn't come here to have you play with my hair, and I don't think I want to know what you want to touch. I came as a friend to warn you, and I'll be leaving as I entered, since you don't seem to need or want my help."

He plowed his fingers into her hair, gently pulling her head back.

She closed her eyes and tried to remember why she'd came. "If the barmaids get you and have their way with you, I'll not hold myself responsible."

He leaned closer, pressing the length of his body against her as he lowered his mouth to hers. This time his kiss wasn't gentle or newborn, but hungry with need as if he'd been thinking of kissing her for hours.

She meant to let out a protest, but when she opened her mouth, his tongue pushed between her lips and the kiss turned liquid with passion.

Rainey didn't move. She didn't reach for him, or fight to get away. She just let the feel of him wash over her. His body warmed her, as his kiss took full measure, letting her know how hungry he'd been for the taste of her.

Finally he slowed, allowing her to kiss him. He leaned away so that she could breathe, but with each deep breath, she rubbed against his chest. His mouth moved to her throat. Rainey moaned softly as he kissed the hollow of her neck.

"I have to go," she whispered, feeling as though she might faint with pure pleasure. "It's very late."

He leaned away and straightened as if surprised at how quickly he'd lost control.

He brushed her shoulder as he lowered his hand from her hair. "I'll get my boots and coat and walk you back to your place."

Lowering close to her ear, he whispered, "I didn't hurt you, did I?"

She couldn't help but smile. He had lost control, maybe for the first time in his life. "No, Travis, you didn't hurt me."

He hesitated, as if wanting to touch her, but knowing he should follow her wishes. Despite his passion, he was not the kind of man to force a woman into anything.

"There may be little chance of my being tricked by Snort or Whiny, but there is a good chance of you getting into trouble before you reach home."

"I can take care of myself. I don't need…" She started to argue further, then remembered the high laundry window. Nodding once, she followed him into the drawing room. He sat on the corner of the cot and pulled on boots that came almost to his knee.

She whispered at his side, "Doesn't this place have a bedroom?"

He pointed with a nod. "Sage is in there. There's another one through that door, but Duck likes to sleep by the fire. I think he must have been cold for a long time, because he loves being close to it. I don't want him to wake and be alone, so I had a cot moved in here. All the things Sage bought almost take up the spare bedroom anyway. Once she gets the dresses from the three sisters who live at your place, I'll be lucky to get it all home in one wagon."

Rainey leaned against him as he pulled on his boot, hardly aware that she was touching him. "Are those specially made boots?"

"You bet. Teagen and I both have a pair a year made by a man who can get them to fit like gloves. Tobin prefers moccasins, but I've grown used to the boots."

She leaned closer to his ear. "The girls were talking about your boots. They think you must be rich to have them."

Travis laughed. "No, just comfortable."

He straightened and she almost fell into his lap. His arm circled her waist, catching her and pulling her close. For a moment he stared at her as if surprised she was in his arms so easily.

She panicked, not intending to be so close to him again.

Awkwardly he pulled her against him, holding her.

She shoved at his chest.

"It's all right, Rainey, you're safe."

She realized he was saying the same words he'd said to the boy. "I don't need your…" She stopped hearing her own lie.

He didn't turn loose of her, but she no longer struggled and he held her tight. For long minutes he just held her, giving her the hug she'd said she never had.

Rainey let one tear fall and drop onto his shirt. Her breathing slowed and she felt surrounded by his warmth. It had been so long since she'd felt safe, truly safe. He offered what her father never had, but it was too late, she decided. She'd been cold too long for any fire to warm her.

After a while he whispered, "You all right?"

She pulled an inch away. "I'm fine, but I'm not a child. You don't have to protect me, Travis. Or give me hugs."

He smiled down at her. "It wasn't you," he said. "It was me. I've wanted to hold you all day long. For some reason I find it very hard to keep from touching you." He watched her as if expecting her to say something.

Rainey stood and was thankful he didn't try to keep her from doing so. "You can walk me back, Travis, but only as a friend. I'm not ready for more. I'm not sure I will ever be." She felt she had to admit more. "It's not you. I think you are a wonderful man. It's me." She didn't turn around to see his eyes. She didn't want to know how her words probably hurt him. How could she begin to tell him that she had to believe in herself before she could believe in anyone else?

"Because of your criminal past?" he asked from behind her.

"No," she answered. She couldn't tell him that she'd run away to prove something not only to her father, but to herself. She had to know that she could stand on her own. Rainey wasn't sure she could ever be happy living and depending on a man. She'd seen her mother too unhappy. She'd seen her waste away believing herself worthless. Rainey never wanted to feel that way again. "We need to say goodbye." She waited a moment and added, "I'm not the right kind of woman a man like you should have."

"If that is the way you want it, I'll not argue tonight." He tugged on his coat, picked up his cane. He seemed angry, as if he heard more in her words than she'd said. "There is a door off the hall that will take us to the garden." His voice was cold, totally in control. "I'll open Sage's door in case Duck wakes."

They walked side by side, not touching into the cold night air. Though he used his cane, his steps were faster than before, making her almost run to catch up. They were back to the alley entrance in minutes. He took her hand as they moved through the alley, but there was only purpose in his touch, no gentleness.

When they stood at the open window, he reached to help her in, but she stepped back. She didn't want it to end like this, with him cold to her. He had a right to know that she was stepping out of his life because of her needs, not her feelings toward him.

"What is it?" he asked, as if in a hurry to leave.

"I don't want it to end like this between us."

"Right. You just want it to end." He almost mumbled the last words. "I'm not your kind."

She could see his outline. He looked as granite hard as he had that first night they met and the cowhands confronted him about being a stranger. There was so much she wanted to say, she feared that if she started talking she'd never stop. He probably didn't want to know how dull her life had been or how unloved she'd been. Or, worse, how willing she'd been to accept it all until the very last.

She moved back in place and felt his hands circle her waist, ready to lift her up.

"One last thing, Rainey, if that even is your name," he whispered against her ear. "Why'd you come to warn me if you're not attracted to me? Why'd you kiss me back on the capital steps and again in the hallway tonight? Were you just playing me like the barmaids plan to?"

She turned, but couldn't see his face. "I am attracted to you. How dare you think of me as a liar."

He laughed, hard and unbelieving. "I should have known you'd play it to the end. You'd think I'd learn."

Rainey had no idea what he was talking about, but she didn't like the idea that he thought she'd somehow used him and lied to him. "I didn't kiss you for any reason than because I wanted to, you idiot. In truth, I had no idea how wonderful a kiss could be until you, and I thank you for that memory."

"Stop lying to me," he hissed.

Before Rainey thought, she raised her hand and slapped him hard across the face.

For a moment, the sound echoed off the walls of the alley, then the silence smothered every sound except that of her breathing.

She didn't know what to say. She had too much pride to apologize and too little bravery to tell him the full story. Straightening, she prepared for him to hit her. Her father would have hit her mother-she'd seen it a hundred times when she was growing up. Her mother would make the wrong move, say the wrong thing. Her father would glance around to make sure no one from the school saw, then he'd double up his fist and with one blow knock her to the floor. He'd learned over the years never to hit his wife in the face, but when he'd finish, he'd step over her and mumble, "Silly woman," as he left.

Rainey waited. There was nowhere to run. She had to stand her ground even knowing that one blow from this man, a foot taller than her father, might kill her.

He didn't raise his hand to his face, or to her. He just stood very still. Finally he said. "What are you waiting for? Go."

She fought to keep her voice from shaking. "I'm waiting for you to hit me. I'll not cower or say I'm sorry."

His hand moved and she braced for the blow, but he only rubbed his cheek. "I guess I deserved that slap. You can't help the way you feel. Lots of folks are afraid of my Apache blood. But, no matter what you say, I have no intention of ever hitting you or any woman."

"I should probably even be the one saying I'm sorry. I guessed, since we'd never talked about it, that my blood didn't matter to you. After all, you were at our ranch. You must have seen my father's tartan and my mother's wedding beads in the great room. You knew they came from two worlds." He laughed. "Which pretty much makes me belong in neither."

Suddenly Rainey understood why he'd called her a liar. He truly thought she wasn't attracted to him. "I've never given one thought to your blood, Travis. Of course I knew the story of your parents. The only thing I've ever thought about was. that you were the only one lucky enough to get your mother's brown eyes."

She wished she could see him. It all seemed clear now, his awkwardness around her. He was afraid she'd reject him. And she had rejected him, but it had nothing to do with him.

"The reason I have to say goodbye to you is mine, not yours," she tried. "But believe me, I'll always remember your kiss."

"So, the attraction was there." He sounded doubtful. "I didn't imagine it."

"It was there," she whispered. "It still is."

"Then there is only one way for us to say goodbye."

He leaned forward and lifted her off her feet. For a moment, he held her up, then lowered her mouth slowly to his lips. She knew this was the way they had to say goodbye. The only way that would be right. She wrapped her arms around him and pressed against him.

At first he offered a gentle kiss that warmed her insides. Then, as she kissed him back, he shifted his stance and leaned her against the wall, pressing his body like a warm blanket over her. The kiss deepened.

She felt like she was melting in his embrace. He wasn't demanding but offering her a pleasure she never knew existed. The gentleness surprised her, and like a slow moving current, she floated with it.

She could feel his heart pounding against her as his chest pressed her breasts. With each breath he seemed to be caressing them with his slight movement. She heard herself moan, and then his tongue slid into her mouth, exploring, tasting.

When she broke the kiss to breathe, she held on to him not wanting him to move. But he did. He kissed her throat. While his body pressed against her, his hand tugged at her tattered shirt, pulling several buttons free. Now her throat and neck were open to him all the way down to where her camisole rose with the swell of her breasts.

He leaned back for a moment. "I wish I could see you," he whispered. He touched the tiny bag tied to a string around her throat. "I wish I knew what treasure you keep in this."

Before she could think to answer, his mouth lowered to her again, this time hungry and demanding. Her mind circled from the flood of senses. She could feel the roughness of his cheek against hers, the desire in the depth of his kiss, the need in both their bodies to be closer.

His hands moved over her, branding her with his touch as he memorized the feel of her body. The kiss deepened suddenly with a hunger that rocked her senses, and to her surprise, she answered back in kind.

When he broke the kiss again, his hands circled her waist and lifted her quickly into the window. "Go," he said.

"And don't come to my room again unless you plan to spend some time in my bed."

She wanted to cry, to hold him back, to make him say something gentle and not sharp to her before he left.

But he was gone, vanishing into the night with one step. She stood at the window for a long while letting the night air blow against her open shirt. She didn't feel the cold. All she felt was a longing for a man she knew she had to see again.

Part of her was splitting in two. Her need to be free. Her need for him.

This time he'd been the one who ran, not her.