The Forgetful Fiancée

Chapter Four

Kevin's hand ventured between Tara's legs, and she forgot her worries as a surge of white-hot longing shot through her body. He'd always been able to do this – make her mindless with passion even with the most casual of touches.

"Mmm, my legs won't hold up much longer." She was amazed at how breathless her voice sounded.

"I'll hold you." His breath tickled her as he probed and caressed.

"I'm weak," she pleaded. "I'm debilitated. You're torturing me."

"Okay, I'll stop."

"No!"

He chuckled as he continued his sensual assault. It must have been a very long time since they'd made love, she deduced. Why else would she be so…so… She amazed herself, and maybe him, by reaching a climax. "Oh, that wasn't fair. That was too fast."

He laughed softly again, the sound giving her pleasurable goose bumps. "Then we'll just have to do it all again, won't we?" He swung her up and onto the bed, then took his time removing his own clothes.

"You've got more muscles," she observed as he bared his chest and a six-pack of abs.

"I chop a lot of wood." He didn't tell her that chopping wood was his method of choice for clearing his mind – of her. He'd produced enough logs for ten years' worth of winter nights.

He let her stare at him for a few moments. The approval in her green eyes made him even more excited than he already was. She wasn't the only one who might reach peak performance before it was desirable.

She held out her hand to him. "Lie with me, Kevin. I – I need you."

He joined her in bed, wondering if she'd been about to say she loved him. If only she did. If only she hadn't had to force herself to come to Hardyville.

He gently kissed her face, the hollow of her throat, the inside of her arm, and between her breasts – all the places guaranteed to drive her wild. And when she'd heated up again, he kissed her mouth with an almost savage intensity before entering her.

He moved inside her, his own desires building to an almost unbearable peak until they overflowed. A raging bonfire exploded inside him. Moments later, as he lay spent and damp against her, she put her hands on either side of his face and kissed him, the kiss as gentle and loving as his had been rough and demanding. Surely she still loved him. She must. She'd been really angry the night they'd broken up, and rightfully so, but he couldn't believe that one argument would negate the foundation of trust and love they'd built before then.

As they lay together in a cocoon of intimacy, Tara sighed deeply. This was good, really good. But sex by itself wasn't enough to make a marriage work – she'd heard that from countless sources. She would have to carve a place for herself, cultivate a life of purpose apart from wife and mother. But what could she possibly find to do here in the wilderness that would fulfill her? Start a mail-order homemade soap business? Raise rabbits? Get a job selling paint at the hardware store?

The possibilities made her shiver with distaste.

"Cold?" Kevin asked, drawing the covers over her bare torso.

She was about to answer when a baby's cry startled her. It came from a small speaker on the nightstand – a baby monitor, she realized, a thoughtful touch. Debra's, or Kevin's?

Tara groaned. "I don't suppose you'd like to check on your son, find out what the trouble is?"

Kevin grew tense beside her. "I wouldn't know what to do. You and I have hardly seen each other in the past few months. I – I haven't really spent any time with Andrew alone since he was born."

"Well, you'd better start learning, Daddy-boy," she said playfully, although tension bloomed inside her chest. Surely Kevin wasn't going to turn out to be one of those macho fathers who thought taking care of children was women's work.

Tara all but dragged Kevin with her to check on Andrew. Now that her mind was clearer, she took a good look at the nursery. Fussy, fussy, fussy, with yellow ducks and blue elephants everywhere. But it was well equipped, with everything she would need to care for an infant, and for that she was grateful.

Aunt Debra's work, no doubt.

"Ah, just as I suspected," she said after a quick diaper check. "He needs a change. You do know how to change a diaper, right?"

"I'm not very good at it. I'll watch you do this one. Then the next one's mine."

"That seems fair."

He watched dutifully as Tara went through the now routine task, wiping, powdering, and taping on the new diaper. "Seems easy enough. Will he go back to sleep now?"

"I doubt it. Getting close to feeding time."

"Okay. I need to make a phone call." And just like that, Kevin disappeared upstairs.

Tara sighed. What was wrong with Kevin? She'd never known him to be tentative or wishy-washy about anything. Did he just plain not like kids? Or was he resentful of being trapped into marriage by an unplanned pregnancy? If that was the case, she couldn't go through with the wedding. She could not bind herself to a man whose resentment for his wife and child might well turn to something worse. She had been telling herself she loved him, but could she truly love a man who didn't put his own offspring first?

It took Kevin a couple of minutes after he reached his home office before he stopped trembling. It was a baby, just a baby. But nothing had ever scared him like his own son.

Get a grip, he ordered himself. There was no reason to believe he could not learn to competently, responsibly care for his own child. But then he started thinking of the hundreds of things that could go wrong.

He hadn't anticipated such a visceral response to the baby, and such a confusion of feelings. He couldn't help but love Andrew, a tiny human being that he and Tara had created together. But he was also terrified.

The fear was a result of the events in Chicago – he was smart enough to figure that out. His last day on the force had forever changed him. Before then, he'd liked children, had even participated in some programs to help underprivileged kids. Afterward, though, the sheer miracle of a child's life…and the tragedy of her death…had hit Kevin with the force of a wrecking ball.

He hadn't told Tara about that day's tragedy. She might have heard about it on the news, but she wouldn't have known he was involved. He'd been too close to it, too wrapped up in his sins to confide in anyone, even her. His lack of honesty had cost him the relationship, he realized now. They'd broken up that same day.

He would just have to find the strength to bury his fears, he realized. And meanwhile, he needed to find out what Tara's actual plans had been when she'd come to Hardyville. He didn't want any harm to come to her business in Chicago as a result of this little game he was playing.

He found her partner's phone number and called her, relieved to get her right away. "Cindy? It's Kevin Rayburn, Tara's…friend."

"Thank God! I've been trying to get Tara on her cell phone. Has something happened?"

"Her car was stolen," Kevin said. "She also…she's okay, don't worry, but she can't exactly remember how she got to Hardyville."

"You mean she has amnesia? What about Andrew?"

After calming Cindy down and explaining everything, he asked her to rearrange Tara's appointments and make sure her bills were paid on time. Tara was going to be furious with him as it was. No need for him to wreck her business or her credit rating while he was lying to her.

"I'll give you a week to come clean with her," Cindy finally said. "But only because I think what you guys had is worth salvaging. And because Andrew needs a father. But you do right by Tara, or you'll answer to me."