The Lucky One

Chapter 10

Beth

Maybe she'd misjudged him, Beth admitted. At least as far as work went, anyway. In the last three weeks, Logan Thibault had been the perfect employee. Better than that, even. Not only hadn't he missed a day, but he arrived early so he could feed the dogs-something Nana had always done until her stroke-and stayed late to sweep the floors of the office. Once, she'd even seen him cleaning the windows with Windex and crumpled newspaper. The kennels were as clean as they'd ever been, the training yard was mowed every other afternoon, and he'd even started to reorganize the customer files. It got to the point that Beth felt guilty when she handed him his first paycheck. She knew that the paycheck was barely enough to live on. But when she'd handed the check to him, he'd simply smiled and said, "Thanks. This is great."

It was all she could do to muster a subdued, "You're welcome."

Other than that, they hadn't seen much of each other. They were in the third week of school, and Beth was still getting back into the flow of teaching again, which necessitated long hours in her small home office, updating lesson plans and correcting homework. Ben, on the other hand, raced out of the car as soon as he got home to play with Zeus. From what Beth observed from the window, Ben seemed to view the dog as his new best buddy, and the dog seemed to feel the same way. As soon as their car rolled up the drive, the dog would start nosing around for a stick, and he'd greet Ben with it when the car door swung open. Ben would scramble out, and as she walked up the porch steps, she'd hear Ben laughing as they raced across the yard. Logan-the name seemed to fit him better than Thibault, despite what he'd said at the creek-watched them as well, a slight smile playing across his face, before he turned back to whatever he was doing.

Despite herself, she liked his smile and the ease with which it surfaced when he was with Ben or Nana. She knew that sometimes war had a way of crawling into a soldier's psyche, making it hard to readapt to the civilian world, but he showed no sign of any posttraumatic stress disorder. He seemed almost normal-aside from walking across the country, that is-which suggested that he might never have been overseas. Nana swore that she hadn't asked him about it yet. Which was odd in and of itself, considering Nana, but that was another story. Still, he seemed to be fitting into their little family business better than she'd imagined possible. A couple of days earlier, just as Logan was finishing up work for the day, she'd heard Ben race through the house to his bedroom, only to clatter out the front door again. When she peeked out the window, she realized that Ben had retrieved his baseball from his room to play catch with Logan in the yard. She watched them throw the baseball back and forth, Zeus doing his best to chase down the missed balls before Ben could get to them.

If only her ex had been there to see how happily Ben played when he was not being pressured or criticized.

She wasn't surprised that Logan and Nana were getting along, but the frequency with which Nana brought him up after he'd left for the night, and the glowing nature of her comments, took her aback. "You'd like him," she'd say, or, "I wonder if he knew Drake," which was her way of hinting that Beth should make an effort to get to know him. Nana had even begun to allow him to train the dogs, which was something she'd never allowed another employee to do. Every now and then, she'd mention something interesting about his past-that he'd slept beside a family of armadillos in north Texas, for instance, or that he'd once dreamed of working for the Koobi Fora Research Project in Kenya, investigating the origin of man. When she mentioned such things, there was no denying her fascination with Logan and what made him tick.

Best of all, things around the kennel were beginning to calm down. After a long, hectic summer, their days had settled into a rhythm of sorts, which explained why Beth was eyeing Nana with apprehension over the dinner table at Nana's news.

"What do you mean you're going to visit your sister?"

Nana added a pat of butter to the bowl of shrimp and grits before her. "I haven't had a chance to visit my sister since the incident, and I want to see how she's doing. She's older than I am, you know. And now that you're teaching and Ben is at school, I can't think of a better time to go."

"Who's going to take care of the kennel?"

"Thibault. He's got it down to a science by now, even the training part of this. He said he'd be more than happy to work some additional hours. And he also said he'd drive me to Greensboro, so you don't have to worry about that, either. We've got it all worked out. He even volunteered to start straightening up the files for me." She speared a shrimp and chewed vigorously.

"Can he drive?" Beth inquired.

"He says he can."

"But he doesn't have a license."

"He said he'd get one at the DMV. That's why he left early. I called Frank, and he said he'd be glad to work him in for the driving test today."

"He doesn't have a car-"

"He's using my truck."

"How did he get there?"

"He drove."

"But he doesn't have a license!"

"I thought I already explained that." Nana looked at her as if she'd suddenly become slow-witted.

"What about the choir? You're just getting back into it."

"It's fine. I already told the music director I'd be visiting my sister, and she says there's no problem. In fact, she thinks it's a good idea. Of course, I've been with the choir a lot longer than she has, so she couldn't exactly say no."

Beth shook her head, trying to stay on subject. "When did you start planning all this? The visit, I mean?"

Nana took another bite and pretended to consider. "When she called and asked me, of course."

"When did she call you?" Beth pressed.

"This morning."

"This morning?" From the corner of her eye, Beth noticed Ben following the interchange like a spectator at a tennis match. She shot him a warning look before returning her attention to Nana. "Are you sure this is a good idea?"

"It's like candy on a battleship," Nana said with an air of finality.

"What does that mean?"

"It means," Nana said, "that I'm going to see my sister. She said she's bored and that she misses me. She asked me to come, and so I agreed to go. It's as simple as that."

"How long do you intend to be gone?" Beth suppressed a rising sense of panic.

"I'm guessing about a week."

"A week?"

Nana glanced at Ben. "I think your mom has caterpillars in her ears, She keeps repeating everything I say like she can't hear me."

Ben giggled and popped a shrimp into his mouth. Beth stared at them both. Sometimes, she thought, dinner with these two was no better than eating with the second graders in the cafeteria.

"What about your medicine?" she asked.

Nana added some more shrimp and grits to her bowl. "I'll bring it. I can take my pills there just as easy as I can take them here."

"What if something happens to you?"

"I'd probably be better off there, don't you think?"

"How can you say that?"

"Now that school has started, you and Ben are gone most of the day and I'm alone in the house. There's no way Thibault would even know if I was in trouble. But when I'm in Greensboro, I'll be with my sister. And believe it or not, she has a phone and everything. She stopped using smoke signals last year."

Ben giggled again but knew enough not to say anything. Instead, he grinned at the contents of his bowl.

"But you haven't left the kennel since Grandpa died-"

"Exactly," Nana cut her off.

"But…"

Nana reached across the table to pat Beth's hand. "Now, I know you're worried that you won't have my sparkling wit to keep you company for a while, but it'll give you a chance to get to know Thibault. He'll be here this weekend, too, to help you out with the kennel."

"This weekend? When are you leaving?"

"Tomorrow," she said.

"Tomorrow?" Beth's voice came out as a squeak. Nana winked at Ben. "See what I mean? Caterpillars."

After cleaning up the dinner dishes, Beth wandered to the front porch for a few solitary minutes. She knew Nana's mind was made up, and she knew she'd overreacted. Stroke or not, Nana could take care of herself, and Aunt Mimi would be thrilled to see her. Aunt Mimi had trouble walking to the kitchen these days, and it might very well be the last chance Nana had to spend a week with her.

But the exchange troubled her. It wasn't the trip itself that bothered her, but what their little struggle at the dinner table signaled- the beginning of a new role for her in coming years, one she didn't feel altogether ready for. It was easy to play parent to Ben. Her role and responsibilities were clear-cut' there. But playing parent to Nana? Nana had always been so full of life, so full of energy, that until a few months ago it had been inconceivable to Beth that Nana would ever slow down. And she was doing well, really well, especially considering the stroke. But what was going to happen the next time Nana wanted to do something that Beth honestly believed wasn't in her best interest? Something simple… like driving at night, for instance? Nana couldn't see as well as she used to, and what was going to happen in a few years when Nana insisted that she wanted to drive to the grocery store after work?

She knew that in the end, she'd handle these situations when the time came. But she dreaded it. It had been hard enough to keep Nana in check this summer, and that was when her physical problems were obvious even to Nana. What was going to happen when Nana didn't want to admit to them?

Her thoughts were interrupted by the sight of Nana's truck slowly rolling up the drive and coming to a stop near the back entrance to the kennel. Logan got out and went around to the bed of the truck. She watched him sling a fifty-pound bag of dog food over his shoulder and head inside. When he emerged, Zeus was trotting beside him, nosing at his hand; Beth figured that he must have kept Zeus inside the office while he'd been in town.

It took him a few more minutes to unload the rest of the dog food, and when he was done, he started toward the house. By then, dusk had begun to fall. The faint echo of thunder sounded in the distance, and Beth could hear the crickets beginning their evening song. She suspected the storm would hold off; with the exception of a couple of scattered showers, it had been miserably dry all summer. But the air, carried from the ocean, was scented with pine and salt, and she flashed on memories from a beach long ago. She could remember seeing spider crabs scuttling before beams from the flashlights that she and Drake and Grandpa were holding; her mom's face illuminated by the glow of the small bonfire her dad had started; the sight of Nana's marshmallow catching fire as they toasted them for smores. It was one of the few memories she had of her parents, and she wasn't even sure how much of it was real. Because she'd been so young, she suspected that Nana's memories had become fused with her own. Nana had told her the story of that night countless times, perhaps because it was the last time they'd all been together. Beth's parents had died in an auto accident only a few days later. "Are you all right?"

Distracted by her memories, Beth hadn't noticed that Logan had reached the porch. In the fading light, his features seemed softer than she remembered.

"Yeah, I'm fine." She straightened up and smoothed her blouse. "I was just thinking."

"I have the keys to the truck," he said, his voice quiet. "I wanted to drop them off before I went home."

When he held them out, she knew she could simply thank him and say good night, but-maybe because she was still upset that Nana had made her decision to leave without talking to her about it first, or maybe because she wanted to make her own decision about Logan-she took the keys and deliberately held his gaze. "Thanks," she said. "Long day for you, huh?"

If he was surprised by her invitation to talk, he didn't show it. "It wasn't too bad. And I got a lot done."

"Like regaining the ability to drive legally?"

He offered a lazy smile. "Among other things."

"Did the brakes give you any problems?"

"Not once I got used to the grinding."

Beth grinned at the thought. "I'll bet the examiner loved that."

"I'm sure he did. I could tell by the wincing."

She laughed, and for a moment, neither of them said anything. On the horizon, lightning flashed. It took some time before the thunder sounded, and she knew the storm was still a few miles off.

In the silence, she noticed Logan was looking at her with that peculiar deja vu expression again. He seemed to realize it and quickly turned away. Beth followed his gaze and saw that Zeus had wandered toward the trees. The dog stood at attention, staring at Logan as if to ask, Do you want to go for a walk? Emphasizing his point, Zeus barked and Logan shook his head.

"Hold your horses," he called out. He turned back toward Beth. "He's been cooped up for a while and he wants to wander."

"Isn't he doing that now?"

"No, I mean he wants me to wander with him. He won't let me out of his sight."

"Ever?"

"He can't help it. He's a shepherd and he thinks I'm his flock."

Beth raised his eyebrow. "Small flock."

"Yeah, but it's growing. He's really taken to Ben and Nana."

"Not me?" She pretended to look wounded.

Logan shrugged. "You haven't thrown a stick for him."

"That's all it takes?"

"He's a cheap date."

She laughed again. Somehow she hadn't expected him to have a sense of humor. Surprising her, he motioned over his shoulder. "Would you like to walk with us? For Zeus, it's almost as good as throwing a stick."

"Oh, it is, huh?" she parried, stalling.

"I don't make the rules. I just know what they are. And I'd hate for you to feel left out."

She hesitated briefly before accepting that he was just trying to be friendly. She glanced over her shoulder. "I should probably let Nana and Ben know I'm going."

"You can, but we won't be gone long. Zeus just wants to go to the creek and splash around for a few minutes before we go home. Otherwise, he gets hot." He rocked on his heels, hands in his pockets. "You ready?"

"Yeah, let's go."

They stepped off the porch and headed down the gravel path. Zeus trotted ahead of them, checking every now and then to make sure they were following. They walked side by side, but with enough distance to ensure they didn't touch accidentally.

"Nana told me you're a teacher?" Logan inquired.

Beth nodded. "Second grade."

"How's your class this year?"

"It seems like a good group of kids. So far, anyway. And I've already had seven mothers sign up to volunteer, which is always a good sign."

Moving past the kennel, they approached the small trail that led to the creek. The sun had dipped below the trees, casting the trail in shadow. As they walked, thunder boomed again.

"How long have you been teaching?"

"Three years."

"Do you enjoy it?"

"Most of the time. I work with a lot of great people, so that makes it easier."

"But?"

She didn't seem to understand his question. He pushed his hands into his pockets and went on.

"There's always a 'but' when it comes to jobs. Like, I love my job and my colleagues are first-rate, but… a couple of them like to dress up like superheroes on the weekend and I can't help but wonder if they're nuts."

She laughed. "No, they really are great. And I do love teaching. It's just that every now and then there's a student who comes from a challenging family background, and you know there's nothing you can do for them. It's enough to break your heart sometimes." She walked a few steps in silence. "How about you, though? Do you like working here?"

"Yeah, I do." He sounded sincere.

"But?"

He shook his head. "No buts."

"That's not fair. I told you."

"Yes, but you weren't talking to the boss's granddaughter. And speaking of my boss, do you have any idea what time we'll be leaving tomorrow?"

"She didn't tell you?"

"No. I figured I'd ask when I dropped off the keys."

"She didn't say, but I'm sure she'll want you to train and exercise the dogs before you leave so the dogs won't get antsy."

They'd come within sight of the creek, and Zeus plunged ahead into the water, splashing and barking. Logan and Beth watched him frolic before Logan motioned toward the low branch. Beth took a seat and he joined her, carefully preserving the space between them.

"How far is Greensboro from here?" he asked.

"Five hours, there and back. It's mainly on the interstate."

"Do you have any idea when she'll be coming home?"

Beth shrugged. "She told me a week."

"Oh…" Logan seemed to digest this.

All worked out, my foot, Beth thought. Logan was more in the dark than she was. "I'm getting the impression Nana didn't tell you much about this."

"Just that she was going and I was driving, so I'd better get my license. Oh, and that I'd be working this weekend."

"That figures. Listen, about that… I can handle things this weekend if you have things to do-"

"It's no problem," Logan said. "I don't have anything planned. And there are some things I haven't had a chance to get to yet. Just some little things that need to be fixed."

"Like installing an air conditioner in the kennel officer'

"I was thinking more along the lines of painting the door trim and seeing what I can do to get the office window to open."

"The one that's painted shut? Good luck. My grandpa tried to fix it for years. He once worked a whole day on it with a razor blade and ended up wearing Band-Aids for a week. It still wouldn't open."

"You're not filling me with confidence here," Logan said.

"Just trying to warn you. And it's funny because it was my grandpa who painted it shut in the first place, and he had a whole storage shed full of just about every tool you could imagine. He was one of those guys who thought he could fix anything, but it never quite worked out as well as he'd planned. He was more of a visionary than a nuts-and-bolts kind of guy. Have you seen Ben's tree house and the bridge?"

"From a distance," Logan admitted.

"A case in point. It took Grandpa most of one summer to build it, and whenever Ben goes there now, I cringe. How it's lasted this long without blowing over I have no idea. It scares me, but Ben loves to go there, especially when he's upset or nervous about something. He calls it his hideout. He goes there a lot." When she paused, he could see her concern, but it lasted only an instant before she came back to him. "Anyway, Grandpa was a prize. All heart and soul, and he gave us the most idyllic childhood you could imagine."

"Us?"

"My brother and me." She gazed toward the tree, the leaves silver in the moonlight. "Did Nana tell you what happened to my parents?"

He nodded. "Briefly. I'm sorry."

She waited, wondering if he'd add anything else, but he didn't. "What was it like?" she asked. "Walking across the country?"

Logan took his time answering. "It was… peaceful. Just being able to go where I wanted, when I wanted, with no rush to get there."

"You make it sound therapeutic."

"It was, I suppose." A sad smile flickered across his face, then was gone. "In a way." As he said it, the fading light reflected in his eyes, making them seem as if they were changing color incrementally. "Did you find what you were looking for?" she asked, her expression serious.

Logan paused. "Yeah, actually I did."

"And?"

"I don't know yet."

She evaluated his answer, unsure what to make of it. "Now don't take this the wrong way, but for some reason, I don't see you staying in one place for very long."

"Is that because I walked from Colorado?"

"That has a lot to do with it."

He laughed, and for the first time, Beth was conscious of how long it had been since she'd had a conversation like this. It felt easy and unforced. With Adam, the conversation had been stiff, as though both had been trying too hard. She still wasn't sure how she felt about Logan, but it seemed right that they were finally on friendly terms. She cleared her throat. "Now, about tomorrow. I'm thinking that maybe the two of you should take my car, and I'll use the truck to go to school. I'm a little worried about the truck's brakes."

"I have to admit I wondered about that, too. But I'm pretty sure I can fix it. Not by tomorrow, but on the weekend."

"You can repair cars, too?"

"Yes. But brakes aren't hard. They need some new pads, but I think the rotors are probably okay."

"Is there anything you can't do?" Beth asked, only half feigning amazement. "Yes."

She laughed. "That's good. But okay, I'll talk to Nana and I'm sure she'll be fine with using my car. I don't trust those brakes at highway speed. And I'll make sure to check on the dogs when I finish up at school, okay? I'm sure Nana didn't mention that to you either. But I will."

He nodded just as Zeus padded out. He shook off, then moved closer to sniff at Beth before licking her hands.

"He likes me."

"He's probably just tasting you."

"Funny," she said. It was the type of thing Drake would have said, and she was struck by the sudden desire to be alone once again. She stood. "I should probably be heading back. I'm sure they're wondering where I am."

Logan noticed the clouds had continued to thicken. "Yeah, me too. I want to get home before it starts pouring. The storm seems to be getting closer."

"Do you want a ride?"

"Thank you, but no, that's okay. I like to walk."

"Gee, I never would have known," she said with a faint smile. They retraced their steps to the house, and when they reached the gravel drive, Beth pulled a hand out of her jeans pocket and gave a small wave.

"Thanks for the walk, Logan."

She expected him to correct her the way he had with Ben-to tell her again he was called Thibault-but he didn't. Instead, he raised his chin slightly and grinned.

"You too, Elizabeth."

She knew the storm wouldn't last long, though they desperately needed the rain. It had been a hot, dry summer, and it seemed like the heat would never break. As she sat listening to the last drops of rain falling on the tin roof, she found herself thinking about her brother.

Before Drake left, he'd told her that the sound of rain on their roof was the sound he would miss most of all. She wondered if he often dreamed of these North Carolina summer storms in the dry land where he ended up. The thought made her feel hollow and sad all over again.

Nana was in her room packing for her trip, as excited as she'd been in years. Ben, on the other hand, was becoming more and more subdued, which meant he was thinking about the fact that he'd have to spend a big chunk of the weekend with his father. Which also meant she'd have a weekend alone at home, her first solo weekend in a long, long time. Except for Logan.

She could understand why both Nana and Ben had been drawn to him. He possessed a quiet confidence that seemed rare these days. It was only after she got back Co the house that she realized she'd learned little about him that he hadn't already told her during their initial interview. She wondered whether he'd always been so private or if it stemmed from his time in Iraq,

He'd been there, she'd decided. No, he hadn't said as much, but she'd seen something in his expression when she'd mentioned her parents-his simple response hinted at a familiarity with tragedy and an acceptance of it as an unavoidable aspect of life.

She didn't know whether that made her feel better or worse about him. Like Drake, he was a marine. But Logan was here, and Drake was gone, and for that reason as well as more complicated ones, she wasn't sure that she could ever look at Logan with fairness in her heart.

Gazing up at the stars that had emerged between the storm clouds, she felt the loss of Drake like a newly reopened wound. After their parents had died, they had been inseparable, even sleeping in the same bed for a year. He was only a year younger than her, and she distinctly remembered walking to school with him on the first day of kindergarten. To stop his tears, she had promised that he'd make lots of friends and that she'd wait by the swing set to walk him home. Unlike many siblings, they had never been rivals. She was his biggest cheerleader, and he was her unwavering supporter. Throughout high school, she went to every football, basketball, and baseball game he played and tutored him when he needed it. For his part, he was the only one who remained unfazed by her dizzying teenage mood swings. The only disagreement they'd ever had concerned Keith, but unlike Nana, Drake kept his feelings largely to himself. But she knew how he felt, and when she and Keith separated, it was Drake she turned to for support as she tried to find her footing as a newly single mother. And it was Drake, she knew, who kept Keith from pounding on her door late at night in the months immediately afterward. Drake had been the one person she'd ever known that Keith was afraid to cross.

By that point, he'd matured. Not only had he been an excellent athlete in virtually every sport, but he'd taken up boxing when he was twelve. By eighteen, he'd won the Golden Gloves in North Carolina three times, and he sparred regularly with troops stationed at Fort Bragg and Camp Lejeune. It was the hours he spent with them that first made Drake consider enlisting.

He'd never been a great student, and he lasted only a year at a community college before deciding it wasn't for him. She'd been the only one he'd talked to about enlisting. She had been proud of his decision to serve his country, her heart bursting with love and admiration the first time she saw him outfitted in his dress blues. Though she had been scared when he was posted to Kuwait and, later, Iraq, she couldn't help but believe that he was going to make it. But Drake Green never did make it home.

She could barely recall the days immediately after she'd learned that her brother had died, and she didn't like to think of them now. His death had left her with an emptiness that she knew would never fill completely. But time had lessened the pain. In the immediacy of his loss, she never would have believed it possible, but she couldn't deny that when she thought of Drake these days, it was usually the happier times she remembered. Even when she visited the cemetery to talk to him, she no longer experienced the agony those visits once aroused. Nowadays, her sadness felt less visceral than her anger.

But it felt real right now, in the wake of the realization that she-like Nana and Ben-was drawn to Thibault, too, if only because she felt an ease with him that she hadn't known with anyone since losing Drake.

And there was this: Only Drake had ever called her by her given name. Neither her parents nor Nana, no Grandpa, nor any of her friends growing up had ever called her anything but Beth. Keith hadn't either; to be honest, she wasn't sure he even knew her real name. Only Drake had called her Elizabeth, and only when they were alone. It was their secret, a secret meant for just the two of them, and she'd never been able to imagine how it would sound coming from someone else.

But, somehow, Logan made it sound just right.