The Mammoth Book of Paranormal Romance 2

Gail Carriger Marine Biology

The problem, Alec thought, swishing a test-tube full of sea-water about gloomily, is that I’m unexpectedly alive. To be unexpectedly dead would be simplicity itself. After all, he made up the statistic on the spot so that he would sound more learned in his own head, half of all deaths are unexpected. One is, to a certain degree, prepared to die unexpectedly. But when one expects to die at eighteen and instead finds oneself unexpectedly alive at twenty-four, there’s nothing for it but to be confused about everything.

He sighed, put the test-tube into its cradle and dragged his thoughts forcibly back to the sample’s acidic content. Which was unexpectedly high. There’s global warming for you.

His phone rang. After a brief flurry of scrabbling about, he fished it out from underneath a massive book on nudibranchs — how had it migrated there? — and glanced at the caller’s name before flipping it open. His stomach twisted. Great, what’s Dad doing calling me at the lab?

“Yes?”

“Your problem is that you never got used to being alive.”

“I hate it when you do that. Hold on.” Alec pushed his protective goggles up into his spiky hair and rolled his eyes at his boss on the other side of the lab table. “Family emergency,” he mouthed.

Janet, who was the best kind of boss — a relaxed one — merely waved him off to the fire escape.

Alec trotted over and pushed out into the cold grey day. The lab coat was little protection against the biting wind but he didn’t notice. He didn’t really get cold, not since his eighteenth birthday.

“How are you calling me, Jack? You’re non-corporeal.”

The ghost’s tone became petulant. He did not like being reminded of his disability. “Voice dial, of course.”

“Of course. Do you know what kind of heart attack that gave me, seeing Dad’s number?”

“You’ve got to get over this thing with your father.”

“He’s a dick, I’m passive aggressive and you’re the one who’s haunting because of it.”

“We were talking about your problems, remember? You can’t take being alive.”

“So you call me at work to tell me something I already know?”

“No, but I thought if I started out reminding you how well I know you, you might refrain from arguing with me for the next twenty minutes over the thing I actually need to ask you. I always win these arguments, in the end.”

“Jack, you’re making me nervous.” Alec could feel his canines starting to emerge. “You know what happens when I get nervous.”

“Yoga breaths, darling, yoga breaths.”

Alec breathed in deeply through his nose and then out. The telltale teeth retracted slightly. And the rest of the pack wondered how he functioned so smoothly in laboratory-land. He tried to imagine them doing yoga, and that made the teeth entirely vanish. Alec’s fellow pack members were mostly large and hairy and took to being both with enthusiasm. It was as though they were trying to be as stereotypical as possible, working in construction, riding motorcycles, barbequing a lot. Not the yoga types. Unless the yoga somehow involved leather chaps and brisket.

“Fine, yes, so, what’s going on?”

“Party, darling, tonight. My place.”

“Oh, really, must I?” Alec ran a finger under the collar of his polo shirt.

“’Fraid so. Fifi’s calling in and Biff’s bringing the beer. You know what that means.”

“Pack meeting?”

Alec looked nervously up at the gloomy sky, as if it were nighttime already. “Is it full moon? Did I forget it was full moon? I hacked one of those female cycle programs for my computer, it’s supposed to remind me when I’m due.”

Jack interrupted his panic. “No, something else is going on.”

“Crap, what?”

“Can’t tell, darling, can’t tell. But it was made clear that your presence, specifically, is required.”

Alec swore. “Jack? Jack, you’re supposed to be my friend.”

“Dead men tell no tales.”

“Tales or tails?”

Silence met that pun.

Alec’s canines were back. “You know, if you weren’t dead, I’d kill you.”

“But you’ll be there?”

“Clearly, I have to be there. If my brother’s bringing the beer, I’ll bring the salad.”

“No one will eat it.”

“It’s either that or seafood, and I’d rather not remind them how far I’ve strayed away from the family business.”

“Well, that was easier than I thought. I guess you didn’t have a date for tonight?”

“Jack, I never have a date.”

“Pathetic. Even I have a date and I’m dead.”

“You’re telling me.”

“It won’t be me doing the telling.”

“Oh, shit. That’s not what this meeting is about, is it?”

“Just show up, Alec, and bring your damn salad.”

Then the phone went dead. Alec looked at it with an expression of profound disgust, as though the cell were what was wrong with his life. How had Jack managed to hang up without hands?

Alec sighed, flipped the phone shut and slouched back into the lab.

Janet took in his hangdog expression and immediately knew what was required of her as friend and confidante. “Oh no, what happened?”

“Family thing tonight that I didn’t know about.”

“Need me to be your date?”

“Not this time, but thanks.”

“You know, I’ve never met your family. I find it odd to think you came from somewhere.”

“Well, if you met them, you’d find it odder.”

“That bad, huh?”

“The worst. I think they might be staging an intervention.”

“But Alec, you’re perfectly sober. A fine upstanding citizen. I don’t think I’ve seen you drink even a glass of wine. Unless, of course, it’s your addiction to the whole Atkins diet they’re worried about.”

Thank goodness for Dr Atkins — the perfect excuse for a cultured werewolf to eat nothing but meat. Before the good doctor came along, Alec had been forced to hide his shameful rare burger habit.

“With my luck, they’re pulling me out of the closet.”

No one — really, no one — especially not Alec, had expected him to survive the Bite. The only person in existence less qualified to become a werewolf was Richard Simmons. Not that people wandered around calling Alec effeminate, not to his face anyway, but under no circumstances could he be described as either large or hairy.

His Dad was beta to the local pack, with four strapping, football playing, monosyllabic, Playboy-touting sons — and Alec. Alec was the middle child and there’d been some talk about “looking like the neighbour” when he came along. Skinny, even after the whole big feet, eat everything, smelling-like-a-goat, phase. He also read books — not the backs of cereal boxes — and he preferred post-modern literature of all horrible things. He joined the swim team, not the football team, and that only because his father insisted he undertake some kind of sport. High school saw him wallow in typical teenage depression, except that he knew he was going to die. He didn’t have to don eye make-up and write bad poetry. The local werewolf alpha was set to try and change him into a supernatural creature on his eighteenth birthday and there was simply no way he’d survive the transition.

Until he did.

And spent the next six years trying to figure out why, and what to do with his life, and how to reconcile the monthly slavering beast he would become with his still skinny, still post-modern-reading self.

The yoga helped.

Alec’s Dad, the aptly named Butch, owned the house that Jack haunted. That was, in fact, the reason Jack haunted it. It was a popular misconception that a ghost haunted the man who killed him. In actual fact, they tended to go for the person who pissed them off the most in life. Jack, their former next-door neighbour, had hated Butch. There’d been an argument over the sprinkler system and the next thing they knew Jack was stuck forever haunting his neighbour. In a classic ironic twist, the pack now called Butch’s house Jack’s Place. This made Butch livid. Which was one of the reasons the pack did it. The other reason was that Jack wasn’t the kind of ghost who wafted around mistlike in the background. Oh no, he was the kind of ghost who organized parties and criticized your shoe choices. Which is why the parties were always at Butch’s place — Jack liked to get up in everyone’s business. The werewolves thought this was a great joke, that the pack had a pet ghost. Jack could get away with insulting them, because he was already dead and large hairy men didn’t scare him anymore. Quite the opposite, in fact.

Alec marched in, head high, still wearing his lab coat defiantly, and slammed his store-bought salad down on the rickety kitchen table.

“Hi, Ma.”

“Hi, baby. Salad? I was hoping you’d bring sushi. Still, very thoughtful dear. At least you brought something, which is more than I can say for your brothers.” His mother tossed peroxide blond hair out of her eyes.

Alec leaned his hip against the refrigerator. “Well, be fair, they brought their wives. Pam, at least, is useful.”

“Not tonight they didn’t. Pack only.” Both mother and son paused to look out the window at the backyard where a large collection of beefy men milled about drinking beer.

“Where you going, Ma?” Alec snagged a wedge of raw beef before his mother could stick it on the skewer.

“It’s lady’s poker night over at Sharon’s.”

Out in the back yard a couple of the men roared their approval as a great gout of fire flared up off the grill.

“Ugh. Why do they bother? Everyone eats it rare anyway.” Proving his point, Alec nibbled on the cube of meat he was holding.

“Oh, sweetie, men and fire, you know how they get. Doesn’t matter if they’re werewolves or not.”

“Any idea what’s going on?”

“Sorry, baby. Can’t say.”

She hefted the platter of kebabs and carried them out into the backyard. Alec trailed after her.

His mom placed the meat down on a dilapidated picnic table. “Right boys, there you go. Cook it or eat it fresh, it’s not my problem. Just do it out here and don’t mess up my kitchen. You know I hate coming home to find blood all over the floor; it’s hell on the linoleum. I’m off. You know where the beer is kept.”

A chorus of polite “yes, ma’ams” met that remark.

Alec watched her disappear back into the house.

Jack wafted up next to him like a mercurial little genie. “Not a bad sort, your mother.”

“’Cept she’s throwing me to the wolves.”

They stood at the fringes of the gathering, Alec tense and nervous, Jack bobbing up and down softly.

“So,” Jack had that tone in his voice, the tone that said gossip was imminent. “Did you hear Biff’s wife left him?”

“I can’t imagine why. All that lively conversation.”

“Hey now, a man can say a lot using only monosyllabic grunts. Did you bring sushi?”

“No, salad, I told you I would. Don’t you remember? Everyone mocks me when I bring sushi, so I thought I might as well give them a real reason.”

“That’s your problem Alec—”

“Oh, another one?”

“—you’re just obtuse enough not to play their very simple game with any skill. You could. You just have a death wish.”

“Oh, thank you for the psychoanalysis, fly boy.”

“Speaking of sushi, how’s the sea life?”

“Still not grunting.”

“You’re no fun.”

“I don’t like surprises Jack, what the hell is going on?”

“Oh, you’re gonna like this one, I think.”

One of the Neanderthals in front of them tore himself away from a scintillating conversation and lumbered in their direction. He had a massive scar on one cheek, a skull bandana around his head, and the exact expression a pit-bull wears when he catches some other dog peeing in his yard.

“My father could give lessons on stereotypical biker behaviour.”

“Butch is a man of culture and sophistication,” was Jack’s helpful comment before he drifted away. He couldn’t get too near to Alec’s father — classic case of ghostly Tourette’s. Jack would start lunging and swearing at the man who kept him tied to the world. It made for an interesting living environment.

Alec stood his ground.

“Son,” Butch spat the word out like it tasted bad in his mouth. “Did you bring your usual sushi?”

Alec gave his father a funny look. “That’s the third time I’ve been asked that since I arrived. Why? You hate sushi, no one ever eats it when I bring it, and you all make stupid jokes about ‘the other white meat’. Despite the fact that the new place by Bruno’s is really good.” Butch made Alec nervous and when Alec got nervous he babbled. “I don’t think the owner is actually Japanese, but that doesn’t seem to matter.”

Disappointment, a common emotion when talking with his middle child, crossed Butch’s face. “You would fuck it up this time.”

“Christ, Dad, if you wanted sushi why didn’t you email me? Or I could just go out and get the darn stuff right now. It’ll only take five minutes.” He turned towards the house, any excuse to leave.

“Oh, no, really, don’t bother.” That was a new voice. And a new smell. A briny, salty, fishy smell. Not unpleasant to the nose of a marine biologist, even if it was an extra sensitive werewolf nose.

Alec turned back.

To be confronted by one of the world’s most beautiful people — slender, high cheekbones, big blue eyes, straight white teeth, webbed fingers. . Wait! Webbed fingers?

“Whoa, you’re not a werewolf.”

“I should certainly hope not.” The woman smiled at him. Really, very beautiful. Bummer about the gender.

Butch was watching Alec’s reaction carefully, so Alec slid in slightly and took the beautiful woman’s hand in one of his. Trying to pretend attraction. Right, webbed fingers.

“You’re a mermaid?”

The woman gave him that look. “Merwoman, please!”

“Sorry, we don’t get many of your kind in these parts.”

“You do, you just don’t realize it,” that was another new voice — mellow, masculine.

Alec turned. Ooo. Still blond, only taller and definitely male. Merman. Alec suddenly lost access to the part of his brain that housed the English language.

The man gave him a slow smile. “Nice to see you again, Alecanter.”

At a loss, Alec stuck his hand out.

The merman’s skin was cool to the touch, the webbing between his fingers soft and rubbery.

Alec could feel himself start to blush. Crap, why’d I end up the only fair-skinned one in the family? “Do I know you?” Face like that — hell, body like that — I’m not likely to have forgotten.

That smile didn’t waver. “Picture me with dyed black hair and lots of eye make-up.”

Alec nearly swallowed his tongue. Could the man get any sexier? Oh wait. He mentally took off about fifty pounds, all muscle, from the merman and dressed him in a torn black T-shirt emblazoned with the name of some obscure band. “Marvin?” Weirdo goth-boy from high school? No way! “But you wouldn’t even join the swim team.” There’d been some teasing about that, because Marvin used to come and sit and smoke in the bleachers pretty regularly, watching the swim practice. He’d always taken some secret amusement from it.

“Home surf advantage. We merpeeps aren’t allowed. Can’t have the monkeys getting suspicious.”

“That explains why you always wore gloves. I thought it was some weird Goth thing.”

They were still shaking hands, well, still holding hands. Alec let go.

Marvin lowered his own hand slowly and sidled almost imperceptibly closer. “You noticed what I was wearing?”

Alec’s danger warning system went off and he glanced around at the pack. His father was paying awfully close attention to their conversation and frowning. So was the mermaid. Sorry, merwoman.

Alec backpedalled. “You used to watch me, at swim practice. Never thought you’d see a wolf in water?”

The merman wasn’t going to let it go. “You weren’t a wolf yet. But, yeah, that was one of the reasons.”

Alec’s tongue came out to wet suddenly dry lips. He angled towards the merwoman. That’s what straight men did, right? Pay attention to the hot female. “So, what’s your name?”

“Giselle. And before you ask, we’re siblings.”

Alec wasn’t gonna but, “Oh, good,” slipped out anyway.

Marvin’s grin widened.

“So, you two are the reason for the pack meeting, huh? And the sushi obsession.” Alec grappled for civilized thought.

“You could say that.”

“And don’t worry about the sushi. You can totally take me out for some later.” Marvin wasn’t particularly subtle. Alec glared at him, Don’t you dare out me, that’s the last flipping thing I need right now.

The merwoman glanced around, taking in Alec’s sudden tension and Butch’s avid interest in their conversation. “You can take us out later,” she qualified her brother’s statement.

Alec gave her a grateful look. “So, what’s the meeting for then?”

“Pack protocol,” growled his father, “think we better let Fifi tell us.”

Hearing his name, the alpha looked up from the tri-tip he was tearing into and wiped the blood off his massive beard with his sleeve. “Yeah, let’s get this over with so we can really eat.” The alpha was big and furry even in human form, with a ruddy pockmarked complexion. If he wasn’t a werewolf Alec would have described him as yak-like.

The pack pulled into a loose circle with Fifi, the two merfolk, Alec, and Butch at its centre. This made Alec nervous. He usually tried to stay, as much as possible, out of pack focus. Half the pack seemed centred on Fifi but most of the younger members were looking at Alec. This made Alec even more nervous. It had been happening more and more recently, and he was beginning to wonder if they knew something. If perhaps Jack had told someone something he shouldn’t have.

Fifi gesticulated with what was left of the hunk of meat. “This here’s Marv and Grissy.”

“Giselle, please!”

“Grissy,” said Fifi firmly, “they’s in town on official business. Been ordered to meet with us so as we can provide back-up if needed. We gotta assign them a pack liaison, make sure they don’t fuck-up. Alec here’s closest thing we have to a fish guy, so he’s taking the job.”

A chorus of groans met that statement. Giselle was a tempting liaison prospect.

I am? Okay. Well, there’s that explained. Alec couldn’t suppress a little thrill of his own.

“We,” stated Giselle very firmly, “are not fish!”

“And I specialize in micro-organisms anyway. But I wouldn’t try to explain the difference if I were you,” advised Alec.

Butch casually, and without much attention to detail, backhanded Alec across the face. “Don’t be a smart-ass,” he barked at his son.

Pain blossomed in one cheek. Alec had to clamp down on the visceral response to launch himself at his father. It would be so easy just to morph into his wolf head and tear out his dad’s throat. Butch was stronger but it’d be worth it for that first bite.

Marvin lurched forward, expression shocked.

This snapped Alec out of his violent fantasies. He made an almost-imperceptible stopping motion at the merman with one hand. Then he shook his head to clear it and spat blood. Good thing he’d heal quickly. So much for trying to impress the cute boy with clever talk.

Fifi brought everything back into line. “Now Marv, you tell us what’s going on.”

Marvin crossed his arms and arched an eyebrow. “Think I’ll let my sister do that.”

“What are ya, pussy-whipped?” asked Butch.

That’s my father for you, so fucking classy.

Marvin didn’t miss a beat. He smiled an ironic little twist of a smile. “Nope, fin-whipped. We’re a matriarchal society, four-legs. No point in fluffing your ruff at me.”

Giselle said, “Would you two like to go piss in a corner somewhere?”

Alec hid his own grin at that. This was kind of fun to watch.

His father actually growled. At that, Fifi grabbed Butch by the ponytail and tossed him back towards the circle of other pack members. Butch was a big tough guy, but Fifi was bigger and tougher and everyone knew it. Pack dynamics had some benefit. Butch left, still growling low in his throat.

“So we’re here to follow up a lead from a West Coast investigation,” said Giselle, getting right to the point. “Seems the Irish mafia are in town.”

Alec couldn’t help himself, “There’s an Irish mafia?”

Giselle gave him the same kind of look his father gave him. Apparently she wasn’t used to being interrupted. “Well, yeah. We got a couple of selkie to bark to our song, over in San Francisco. Said there’s some kind of money-laundering scheme going on round this coast. You know, offshore accounts.”

“Selkie! What are they doing mixed up with the Irish mafia?”

Giselle, patted him on the arm condescendingly. “Darling, the selkie are the Irish mafia.”

Alec looked around at the pack. “Great, what are we? A sleeper cell for the KGB?” There goes my smart mouth again.

Luckily, unlike Butch, Fifididn’t seem to mind it much when Alec went off. The alpha grinned. “CIA, pup. Canines In Action.”

Very funny.

The pack laughed obligingly.

“Right, so, Alec, you stick with these two. I trust you’ll tell me anything I need to know.” Fifi seemed to think that was settled.

“Yes, sir.”

“Good, let’s eat.”

Fifi wandered off and the pack went back to milling about the barbecues, gulping down booze and meat in equal measure.

Alec turned to their two guests. “So, sushi and further details?”

Marvin smiled brightly. “Perfect.”

Giselle wrinkled her nose. A number of the pack members were ambling in her direction with leers and puffed-up chests. “Definitely.”

Alec and the two merfolk made their way towards the house.

Alec’s oldest brother, Biff, grabbed his arm and pulled him aside before he’d gotten very far.

Alec tensed automatically. He couldn’t be sure but he thought he saw Marvin start back towards him. Giselle put a hand on her brother’s arm.

“So, Bro.”

“Yeah, Biff?” Biff wasn’t so bad, as brothers went. Almost as big as their father and just as tough but a lot less mean. Didn’t say all that much as a general rule, but he had spent some time as a kid pulling the other three brothers off of Alec’s scrawny ass. Alec always felt he owed him for it.

“I recommended you’d do for these two, seeing as your job’s, you know, with the ocean and all. Thought maybe you’d heard something.”

Alec tried to look flattered. I didn’t know Biff had so much sway with the pack these days. “Supernatural? I’m afraid not. I’m a marine biologist, not a wave psychoanalyst. I look at tiny creatures in a laboratory. Even if I did do mammals, selkies are well outside my expertise.”

His brother shrugged massive shoulders. “Yeah, well, I thought maybe something fishy would be right up your alley. Hot, huh? And you like that sea stuff.”

“I study micro-organisms.”

Biff was looking at Giselle’s fine ass climbing the steps into the house. “I wouldn’t say no to getting hold of her micro-organisms.”

“Uh, Biff. Everything okay with you and Pam?”

“Just saying, Bro. You seem to have a little chemistry going on with them fishes there. I’d tap that, if I were you.”

Alec swallowed down on some bile. He’d rather have his dad yelling at him than his brother giving him sex advice. “Biff, did Mom put you up to this?”

Biff gave him a very serious look out of his craggy Neanderthal face. “Pack’s talking, Bro. Why you not doing your duty by us? How long you gonna hold out? You need to settle.”

“You think a werewolf and a mermaid can breed? What, some kind of sea-wolf?”

“Hey now, what’s so bad about being half-fish off dry land? It’s not like you’re showing interest in any other kind of tail.”

“Cute Biff, real cute. Didn’t know you could be witty and all.”

Biff frowned. “Alec, all I’m saying is I recommended you for this job. Don’t fuck it up, unless it’s to fuck. We clear?”

“As a Dutch hooker. Ah shit, Biff, I gotta go, our guests are talking to Jack.”

“They are? Fuck.”

Jack was doing his worst. “Alec, this here is Marvin.”

“Yes, we’ve met. And Jack, we really gotta go.”

“Marvin thinks you’re cute.”

Giselle started to laugh. Marvin didn’t look at all embarrassed. Alec could feel his ears starting to burn.

“Jack,” Alec hissed, “not here!”

The ghost swivelled toward the merman. “Alec thinks you’re cute, too.”

“Jesus Jack, what are you, twelve?”

Marvin laughed and then added, “He’s right, you know, I do.”

Aw shit. Alec lost track of things for a moment. You do?

“And Biff did kind of set this whole thing up,” cheeped Jack, helpfully. “Could be he approves.”

Alec glared at the ghost. “I don’t think Marvin was the one my brother intended me to get to know.”

Giselle nodded her agreement. “I’m thinking the fuzzy one is right, brother dear.”

Marvin sidled in close to Alec. “Ah, you’re not out, are you?”

When did briny get to be such a sexy smell? Alec looked between brother and sister. “And you are?”

In this Giselle seemed content to let her brother do the talking, merely watching their interaction with amusement.

Marvin shrugged. “Hey, I live in a world run by women. I was outed by household gossip before I’d even acknowledged I was gay to myself.”

“Nice life, but we really should be having this conversation somewhere other than my incredibly homophobic father’s kitchen.” Alec glanced nervously around the empty room.

“Werewolves not so down with it, huh?”

“Well, just look at them.”

A tussle had started in the back yard, Biff and one of the other youngsters. Punches were being thrown. Any second now the combatants would be ripping off their clothing and fighting, teeth and claw. Alec turned to watch, interested despite himself.

Jack said, “When you gonna just fight Butch?”

Alec shrugged.

“What, afraid you might win?”

“Shut up, Jack.”

Marvin came up and pressed partly against Alec’s back. Alec felt suddenly very warm.

“It seems like a pretty cool situation, if you like ’em big and hairy. You get like that, pretty boy? With the whole growling and tearing off of your clothes? Not that that’s really my thing. I’m kind of liking this lab coat look. I mean, how hot is it that you’re actually a marine biologist?”

Well that is a new one. Usually, guys get off on my being a werewolf, not a scientist.

Marvin petted Alec’s arm as though Alec were some skittish animal.

“So here I am, a marine mammal, and I got biology. I was thinking I might work my way on to your sample chart.”

Alec laughed and turned to look down at the man next to him. This is really a bad idea, with the pack right out there. Nevertheless he couldn’t help but lean into the petting. “Didn’t you just hear me telling Biff? I specialize in micro-organisms.”

Marvin shrugged. “Probably got a few of those too.”

“Ew, not sexy.”

“So, date sometime?”

Who knew sea mammals could be so aggressive. “Aren’t we supposed to be heading out to sushi?”

“I’m thinking a date without my sister along.”

“I can’t.”

“Why not?”

“Pack.”

“So?”

“Don’t you have, oh I don’t know, a school or something you have to keep happy?”

Giselle interrupted them at that. “My pearl, we’d be happy to see him dating anyone. It ain’t healthy for our kind to go on for such a long dry spell.”

Now it was Marvin’s turn to look embarrassed.

Alec was intrigued. A man as hot as Marvin? “Really?”

“Oh yeah, been carrying a torch for some young stud since high school.”

Wow, blonds sure can blush.

“Awe, Giselle! Must you.” Suddenly the two merfolk were acting like true siblings.

Alec arched his eyebrows at the merman. “High school, huh?”

Marvin’s blush got, if possible, deeper. “Hey, you were this hot jock.”

“Wait, me?” Alec practically squeaked.

“I had to grow out of being that weird skinny Goth kid.”

Alec was incredibly flattered. “Well, allow me to say, you did it beautifully.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” My god he has gorgeous eyes.

Jack’s voice interrupted what was looking to be a very interesting progression to the conversation. “Boys! Not that I ain’t enjoying the show, but we got company.”

Alec practically leaped all the way across the kitchen. His teeth sprang out, and he felt his eyes start to shift.

Marvin watched this action with interest. “I don’t know whether to be insulted or turned on.”

Alec growled at him. Instinctive response.

“Ooo, definitely turned on.”

“Oh, shut up, Marvin,” said his sister. “You got no idea what kind of pack dynamics you’re messing with.”

“Yeah? Well I know which ones I’d like to be messing with.”

The kitchen door swung open and Fifi marched in.

“Still here? Thought you guys were off to catch a meal.”

“We got a little distracted by the architecture,” Giselle jumped into the breach. “House designs always intrigue me. As a sea person, you know?”

Nothing could be calculated to turn Fifi off the scent quicker. The alpha’s eyes glazed over. “Yeah, well, whatever floats your boat.” He gave Alec’s ruffled appearance a curious look. “You’re always so tense youngling. Think perhaps your brother’s right. You need to get laid.”

Alec sputtered.

Marvin muffled a snort of laughter.

“Uh, yes sir.” Alec started inching towards the hallway. “’K, we’ll be off now, sir.”

“Carry on.”

Alec shepherded the two merfolk out of the house.

Jack’s voice whispered in his ear just before the door slammed shut behind them, “Now you’re under orders from your alpha.”

“Fuck off, Jack.”

“Not before you.”

Alec’s favourite sushi place was pretty crowded for so early in the evening. But Giselle’s looks and charisma got them a table pretty darn fast, and Alec was a regular — popular with the staff.

“Where’s your girlfriend?” asked the waitress, twinkling down at them all. She was a pretty dark-haired girl with big brown eyes who’d always had more than just a nice smile for Alec. Alec, had, of course, never noticed.

“Oh, Janet? Uh, not with me this evening.”

Marvin gave him an accusing look as soon as the woman had taken their orders.

“Girlfriend?”

“Naw. Janet is just my boss down at the lab. It’s easier to just—”

Giselle interrupted, “Of course, avoidance is the hallmark of all gamma werewolves.”

“Who said I was a gamma?” But Alec muttered it so softly the other two didn’t seem to hear. Merpeople, Alec figured, probably aren’t all over the supernatural hearing. Not something particularly called for under water.

Marvin cocked his golden head to one side, thoughtfully. “So, how deep in the closet are you?”

Alec gave him an expressive look. “Honey, I shit mothballs.”

They paused while the waitress put down their tea.

“Your pack is really that bad?” Giselle asked politely.

“It’s big and restless. Not the type of environment for a sudden revelation as to my sexual orientation.”

“You sure? They don’t seem all that bad. Well, except your father. He’s a piece of work.”

Alec didn’t take that bait. “Hmm. Pack should have splintered before we got to such numbers. But no one from my generation has claimed alpha. Biff’s got promise, and I know he’s courting a few of the youngsters, but I’m not sure he’s got it.”

“Got what?” Marvin leaned forward, interested.

“You know, it. That thing that alphas have.”

“I have no idea what you are talking about.”

Alec shrugged. “That’s because I’m trying to teach a fish to ride a motorcycle here.”

“Hey, I’m pretty good on two wheels.” Marvin smiled at him.

“And still — not fish,” added Giselle.

Alec decided to try a new line of conversation. “So the West Coast, huh? Is that where you went after high school?”

Marvin nodded. “Oh, yeah, you know, pod migration. Being a merman is almost as bad as being an army brat, we move around.”

“And this investigation of yours?”

Giselle jumped in. “We’ve been tracking this racket for a while. Ocean’s our jurisdiction, as I’m sure you know. But there seems to be some kind of land connection with this one. Selkies can be a problem. Slough off their skins and suddenly the trail dries right up.”

“What’s this one done? Murder? Kidnapping?”

“Nothing violent like that. Pure white-collar action. Some funding collected by one of our nonprofits disappeared. We have this ocean reclamation and coral rescue operation, suddenly half the bank account vanished along with this fellow and his family.”

“Mmm,” Alec nodded. “How much are we talking here?”

“Three point two million dollars.”

Alec coughed into his green tea. “All that for coral?”

Giselle shrugged. “The non-profit fronts a dummy account for our pod to run day-to-day integration operations. You know how it gets for us supernatural types. Trying to keep everything hidden from the monkeys. We contracted out a few delicate bits of business to a reputable selkie agent and the next thing we know. .”

“Tough break. What makes you think it ended up here?”

The waitress reappeared with their sushi and a very wide-eyed look. Alec wondered if she had overheard any of their conversation.

“Those informants we told you about.”

“Oh, yeah, I remember.” Alec bit into a piece of tuna happily. It wasn’t quite as good as fresh red meat, but there was something appealing about fish. He was a little sorry the rest of the pack were so down on it all the time. They were really missing out. “So, where should we start?”

“How about when? Tomorrow morning, your place?”

Alec agreed and gave them his address. They enjoyed the rest of the meal accompanied by pleasant inanities and mild flirting. Alec returned home feeling, for the first time in a long while, as though it was okay to be unexpectedly alive.

They met the next morning at Alec’s tiny apartment.

Marvin brought Alec a tin of sardines as a courting gift.

“How do you know I’m not the kind of guy who likes whole salmon?”

The merman gave him a look, and then, despite the amused presence of his sister, leaned in and kissed Alec full on the lips.

Alec was startled but not unwilling. It was early for such shenanigans but the way his love life had been lately he’d take what he could get. Marvin tasted amazing, far better than the sushi of the night before. And that had been really good sushi. Salt and sea and something else. Something chemically addictive and sexual. It rather derailed Alec’s thoughts. Especially as Alec wasn’t much of a morning person anyway.

Marvin pulled away first, licking his lips. “You know I’ve been waiting about ten years to do that?”

Alec rediscovered his attitude. “Self-control not one of your strong points?”

“Oh, someone is snarky today. You always like this in the morning?”

“Wouldn’t you like to find out?”

“Absolutely.”

Giselle brushed past the two men in the doorway and took in Alec’s small apartment at one glance. It was neat and tidy and masculine without any further pretensions towards style or fashion.

“Well, this is certainly no indication of your sexual orientation.”

Alec arched his eyebrows. “What were you expecting, pink leopard print couch covers and a gilded floor lamp?”

Marvin grinned. “She has weird ideas about you land people. You’ll have to excuse her assumptions on the grounds of ignorance. It’s only us mermen who get sent in to attend dry schools. Our females cause too many problems. Especially with teenagers.”

Alec watched Giselle sway about his living room, long thick blond hair just touching her undulating hips. “I can’t imagine why.”

“Hey!” A pair of cool fingers pulled Alec’s chin around to look into Marvin’s face.

Alec smiled, swooped in and gave Marvin a full-on kiss. There it was again, that addictive taste, delicious. It would have been all too easy to continue, so Alec pulled back. The merman was left looking agreeably speechless. “Purely an aesthetic observation I assure you. So, where are you two staying?”

Giselle returned from her perusal. “Little place down by the docks, of course.”

Ask a silly question, reflected Alec. He went to pour himself some coffee. Caffeine didn’t do much for the werewolf constitution but he enjoyed the ritual of it and the lab insisted on a near constant supply. He waggled the pot at his guests but both shook their heads.

“Got any clam juice?” Marvin asked.

“Should I open these sardines?”

Marvin looked hurt. “Those are a gift, special just for you, don’t be crass.”

Alec smiled, and put the sardines carefully on to the counter near his toaster. “Very thoughtful.”

Giselle seemed to think it was time to stop the flirting and get on to business. “So we’re thinking the best way to hide the money would be to feed it into some kind of local business.” Giselle pulled out a sheet of paper. “Here’s a list of businesses started over the last few months. I’ll try all the clothing stores. You two try the restaurants.”

“You sure you’ll be okay on your own?”

The merwoman gave Alec a look that should have turned him to stone on the spot.

In fact it did.

Alec felt his body involuntarily seize-up. His feet felt like they’d been super-glued to the floor. The merwoman continued to stare at him, something deadly in her big turquoise eyes, and Alec couldn’t for the life of him move a single muscle.

Finally she turned that aquamarine gaze away and Alec felt his body come once more under his control.

“Wow, impressive.”

Marvin looked mildly amused. “Natural defensive mechanism,” he explained. “Ever heard the myth of Medusa, turning people to stone? That’s where it comes from.”

“Can you do it too?” That’d make for an interesting relationship.

“Nope.”

“What about the whole siren song thing?”

Giselle grinned. “Oh, we can both do that.”

Marvin added, “But not around werewolves. What’s alluring to monkeys causes you guys to bleed out of the ears.”

“Sensitive supernatural hearing?”

“Exactly.”

“Okay then.”

They left Alec’s apartment and set off on a strange kind of tour of new businesses about the city. Alec found Marvin an amiable companion. The merman was a horrible flirt, but mostly harmless about it. They made an effective pairing, what with Marvin’s open and engaging ways and Alec’s natural reticence. But they had no success, and met with a sulky Giselle later that night to find that she too had had no luck. She waved them off to the sushi restaurant without her, insisting that all she needed was a long bath and a can of clam chowder.

Back at Alec’s favourite sushi place, the dark-eyed waitress took their orders and then vanished, wearing a skeptical look.

“She doesn’t like me,” commented Marvin, idly watching the girl’s retreating back.

“And why should she have an opinion?” Alec hadn’t really noticed.

“’Cause she likes you.”

Alec was genuinely surprised. “She does? That was unintentional.”

“It’s one of your more endearing qualities.”

“Unintentionality?”

“Mmm. I remember you in high school, cutting a swathe through all those cheerleaders — no idea how much arguing there was over the presence or absence of your interest.”

“Oh yes, of course. Scrawny old me. The ladykiller.”

Marvin brushed aside Alec’s sarcasm. “You had this incredible attractiveness and you never even realized it.”

“I did?”

“You do.”

“Flatterer.” Alec could feel himself blushing. He sipped tea to hide his self-consciousness.

“Not at all. So, why are we dodging around this thing between us?” Marvin slid his hand under the table and rested it casually on Alec’s knee.

“You’re a merman who’s out and lives on the other side of the country?” Alec didn’t react to the hand on his knee, but he didn’t remove it either.

“Pah, insignificant details.” The hand squeezed and then began a gentle exploration.

“Because I have this feeling you’re just trying to satisfy some left-over adolescent curiosity?” The hand stilled its wandering and was removed.

Marvin pouted. “Why must you be so serious? Okay, fine. And what? You’re looking for a lifelong commitment, when you can’t even tell your family you’re gay?”

“Touché.”

The hand returned. “So our relationship has a few minor difficulties. What true love experiences smooth swimming from the start?”

Alec couldn’t help but smile at that.

The waitress and her frown returned with their order.

“I hardly see that she should feel so strongly,” said Alec, this time noticing the girl’s gloomy expression. “It’s not like I’m a regular or anything. This place hasn’t really been open long enough to have regulars.”

Marvin blinked at that. “New business? How new?”

Alec bit into a piece of sashimi. “Couple of months ago. And you know I wasn’t going to try it, because I heard the owner wasn’t even Japanese, but then. .” Alec trailed off, following where Marvin’s question had led. “Right time frame?”

The merman nodded. “And that waitress does have very large and dark eyes.”

Alec really looked at the woman for the first time. “Fetching girl.”

“What does she smell like?”

Alec shrugged. “Fish, but then, Marvin, this is a sushi restaurant. Everyone smells like fish.”

“Let’s finish up, shall we? I have a sudden need to investigate the kitchen of this establishment.”

The waitress returned, looking hard and determined. “How’s your meal, boys?”

“Delicious. But I’m afraid I must ask to see your kitchen.” Marvin pulled out his wallet and flashed some sort of badge at the young woman. “Health inspectors.”

The dark eyes widened and then narrowed. “Of course, sir. Right this way.”

Marvin stood, grabbed his jacket, and followed. Alec, rather clumsily, glommed on to the merman’s scheme and trailed after.

The kitchen was everything that a health inspector might wish, very clean and very modern, all the appliances shiny and new. It was also equipped with some very large and solid frying pans, which Alec’s head discovered much to his surprise. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Marvin receive the same frying pan treatment, then there was nothing but blackness.

Alec was the first to awaken. Werewolf healing apparently beat out merman abilities in that arena. It didn’t stop his head from hurting like the devil. There was a throbbing pain coming from the back of his skull. What the hell?

His sensitive werewolf hearing went into immediate overdrive. Not that he needed it — whoever was speaking was mighty close.

“Health inspectors, health inspectors indeed. I think not!” That was an unknown voice, deep and masculine and heavily tinged with Irish.

The sushi restaurant owner, I presume.

“Now, Da,” that was the voice of the pretty dark-eyed waitress. “How can you be certain? Pure certain they aren’t health inspectors?”

“Well, that one there’s a web-handed tail-ended nark. Can’t you tell from the hair and the cheekbones? Humans just don’t grow that beautiful. Not outside of Denmark, anyway. Can’t rightly place the pretty boy, but you can bet he’s something we don’t want reporting on our whereabouts.”

“Shame really, he’s been coming in to my section for weeks now. I kinda thought, you know. .”

A snort met that comment. “Just goes to show where thinking will get you.”

“He’s also awake,” said Alec, sitting up and testing the strength of the rope that bound his hands tight behind his back. The rope eased against his flesh. Not strong enough for a were of any breed, let alone a wolf. He cocked his head at his two captors. They really didn’t know what he was. Silly selkies. Alec supposed he couldn’t really blame them all that much, after all, he didn’t look like a werewolf, not even slightly. For once his appearance was standing him in good stead.

Alec let them think they had the upper hand — or was it flipper? — at least while Marvin was still out of it. He looked sideways, down at his companion. The beautiful blond lay flopped, eyes closed, face abnormally pale. Alec frowned in concern. What if they really have damaged him? Perhaps mermen can’t recover from frying pans to the head. Alec could feel his canines beginning to show in anger and agitation. What the hell? He wasn’t in any immediate danger. Usually, his wolf side didn’t take any kind of protective interest in others, not even in his friends, only in his own worthless skin. Alec heard Jack’s voice in his head, Yoga breaths, darling.

Alec took several deep breaths while Marvin lay there, quiet and still. Alec’s inner wolf remained unhappy about this and felt very protective despite the yoga. Well, crap, thought Alec, finally understanding his own feelings, this is mating behaviour. Fantastic. I always knew I had this abnormal affection for fish, but really, Body, this is a ridiculous. Stop it.

The teeth retracted slightly and Alec decided it would be best to look away from Marvin’s comatose form.

So he glanced about his surroundings, to find that they were in some kind of storage room, possibly a cellar. The waitress sat over to one side, on top of an overturned plastic tub, and next to her stood a very fat, very fierce-looking man, with the most impressive moustache Alec had ever clapped eyes on. And Alec had hung out with the Hell’s Angels on more than one occasion, so he was tough to impress.

“You didn’t hit him hard enough, pup,” said the man with the moustache to the waitress.

“Sure I did, Da!”

“Then why’s he up and talking so soon?”

“Don’t know, Da.”

Alec saw Marvin twitch slightly out of the corner of his eye. Awake and playing possum? He had a moment of profound relief.

“So,” said Alec casually, “Used the money to set up a Sushi restaurant, did you? I commend you, you have really good sushi.”

“Well, what else were we to do?”

“Still, setting up this place can’t have taken all of it.”

“No, it didn’t.”

“So,” Alec gave the moustache an opening.

“So?” The fat man was not so much of an evil Bond villain to fall for that trap.

“So where’s the rest?”

The massive moustache twisted in annoyance. “Wouldn’t you just love to know?”

Alec sighed. Marvin twitched again. The merman was shamming. Hoping Marvin would follow his lead, Alec decided to take a chance.

He shifted forms, the rope bonds dropping easily off of his now reconfigured body. His pants also fell away. Sadly, his shirt was not so accommodating. It got all tangled about his neck and forelegs and he ended up having to rip it off with an undignified wiggle. Darn it, that was Armani. Of course, Alec could have simply broken the rope bonds but he didn’t feel the need to prove himself with any of that masculine tripe — that was more his father’s speed. Shifting out of them was easy enough, and it put him in wolf form, which was far more practical for fighting.

He charged at the man with the moustache.

The man let out the most remarkable barking bellow but didn’t run, instead moving forward to meet Alec’s flying furry leap with a crash.

The man was a hell of a lot stronger and more nimble then he looked, and he seemed to know a thing or two about fighting against a wolf. He went for the muzzle, wrapping one beefy arm about Alec’s nose, clamping Alec’s jaw shut, and jabbing at Alec’s eyes with his other hand. Meanwhile the waitress leaped for Alec as well, grappling with his legs. She, too, was unexpectedly strong. Crap, no one warned me selkies had superhuman strength.

Alec scrabbled, sharp and fast, his back legs raking down the woman’s face and neck. She let go with a cry of pain. Then he turned his attention towards the man. Alec scraped forward with his front legs, claws out and wickedly sharp, and at the same time he twisted and jerked back, managing to free his head. He whipped it around and clamped down with big sharp white teeth on the man’s upper arm. He then put a concerted effort into tearing that arm right off. Alec didn’t normally consider himself a violent man, but sometimes, arms simply needed to be removed.

While he was busy gnawing, he noticed two things. First, that Marvin was up and running frantically around the cellar, clearly looking for something. Second, that the moustached man’s arm tasted rather odd. The normal bloody red meat taste of human flesh was absent. Instead the man tasted like salt-cream mixed with hazelnuts. It was quite pleasant, actually. Alec bit down harder. However, he didn’t seem to be getting anywhere with the amputation agenda.

Marvin reappeared in his line of vision, carrying what looked like two scruffy fur coats. The waitress screamed in horror upon seeing them, and this diverted the moustached man’s attention away from Alec.

“No!” he cried, as though that would stop the merman.

“Oh, yes,” replied Marvin. And then he threw one of the ratty fur coats over the man’s head and the other over the waitress’s.

Alec had seen many shape changes in his day. Werewolves, after all, were all over that shit. But he’d never seen any quite so fast, involuntary, and undignified as the two that resulted from Marvin chucking those fur coats.

The arm he’d been chewing away at vanished as the fat man collapsed back on to the floor in a yelling, shivering, convulsing blob. This quickly resolved itself into a barking shivering convulsing brown blob with outrageously long tusks. It still sported a large and impressive moustache. A walrus selkie? Huh, who knew.

While Alec’s animal form served him well on land, the selkie were handicapped by their alternative duds. The waitress (who seemed to be some kind of harbour seal) and the walrus could do nothing more effectual than a sort of awkward worming in Alec’s direction, which was more ridiculous than threatening.

Alec converted back into his human shape. Being wolf seemed a little much given the enemy’s current state. He poked about, looking for his discarded jeans. Despite the fact that most of Marvin’s attention was on their undulating opponents, the merman still seemed to have plenty to spare for Alec’s naked form. Unfortunately, the walrus flopped over and tried to tusk at Alec’s ankle before he could get hold of his jeans, so Alec took refuge up a little stepladder. Marvin, with a decided twinkle in his eye, joined him. The diminutive nature of the stepladder made for an agreeably intimate relationship. Marvin was quite as thrilled by the lack of jeans as Alec was troubled.

“Their skins?” Alec asked, over the barking sounds as the two blubbery beasts wiggled viciously against the base of the stepladder.

“Yes.”

“How long do they have to stay — uh — floppy?”

“Once they are in seal form they must visit the ocean, only then can they remove their skins and return to dry land as humans.”

“Bummer.”

“And you thought you werewolves had it tough.”

Alec shrugged.

“You make a very handsome wolf, by the way. Though I’m thinking I like this form best of all.” One of the merman’s webbed hands formed a newly intimate relationship with Alec’s posterior.

Alec blushed. He’d always thought his wolf form a little bony. Speed was his best trait, not brawn. “Thanks.”

“Beautiful, even.” Marvin shifted against him and tilted in, going for a kiss.

Alec obliged him, though it was not the most romantic of moments — atop an unstable stepladder with two angry seal-type creatures barking up at them.

Marvin seemed interested in pressing matters further, and a tentative tongue tip touched Alec’s lip.

Well, fuck it, I might as well show him everything. Which was when a different part of Alec’s wolf side came to the fore, and Marvin learned a thing or two about what kind of wolf he was attempting to court.

Alec modified the kiss, rising up on his toes and pressing bodily downwards against the merman, slanting his head and diving his tongue aggressively into the other man’s mouth.

Marvin gave a little squeak of surprise, but acquiesced willingly enough, melting easily against Alec’s aggression. Alec gave a little growl of approval and grabbed that tempting long blond hair with one hand, and yanked the merman’s head around to exactly the right angle. Now, that’s a kiss.

Then he stopped.

Marvin, for once, seemed to have nothing to say. His mouth went open and then closed for a little while in shock. He looked like — well — like a fish. Finally he said, eyes wide, “So that’s how it is?”

Alec, blushing a little at his own temerity, pretended a casual shrug. “You thought I was submissive?”

Marvin nodded, but recovered from his surprise enough to snuggle up against him.

Alec explained. “You thought I was in the closet just because I was gay? Not me, I got far more problems. I’m a closet alpha too. I just act the gamma around the pack, makes things easier. I’m a non-confrontational kinda guy.” The stepladder tilted dangerously at a particularly hard whack from the walrus. They would have to deal with the selkie situation soon.

But Marvin was more interested in the implication of Alec’s kiss. “You telling me you’re an alpha in everything?”

“Do you even know what that means?”

“Apparently not.”

“Well, for one thing people are always trying to follow me places without my actually doing anything. Can get pretty hairy in a gay bar, let me just say. And I am so not into bears.”

Marvin blinked at him.

“I was trying to be funny.” Alec sighed. “So, technically, yes. I’m alpha. That’s kind of what started all my problems. I always knew, you see? Since right after they changed me. You just kind of do know, once you’re a werewolf. Know where you sit in a pack, I mean. But, can you imagine the hell I’d have to pay if it became known by anyone else? My dad already suspects, and I think Biff might too.”

“I thought they suspected you were gay.”

“Possibly. But that’d just be the excuse to fight me. I might be able to take a couple hits now and again, but a real fight? It’s in my nature to have to prove things. That’d just be bad. So I avoid it.”

Marvin looked at him. “You just don’t want the responsibility of your own pack?”

Alec shrugged. “Maybe.”

Marvin blinked long blond lashes at him in a parody of a fifties housewife. “Honey, are you telling me I’m in love with a single dad?”

“If you count about seven grown-up bikers. Yup.”

“That’s how many you think would follow you?”

“If I won alpha, sure.”

“I always wanted a big family.” Marvin didn’t seem to mind this possibility.

“You’re a loon, you know that?”

The most remarkable high-pitched yet melodic keening wail cut through both their conversation and the seal barking. Alec flinched. The sound was so sharp it almost tore through the delicate drum of his hypersensitive ears.

“What the hell?”

Marvin grinned. “I believe my sister has arrived. Cover your ears.”

Alec did so. Marvin threw back his head and let out a correspondingly painful yet lovely sound.

A few moments later a loud banging commenced and then the door at the top of the cellar steps crashed open, breaking the bolt. Giselle appeared. She was shadowed by three large and bulky figures who seemed to have done the brunt of the damage to the door.

Alec sniffed suspiciously. Eau de Dad, brother, and alpha. Just wonderful.

Giselle and the werewolves crashed down the stairs and then paused, confused, at the bottom. For there were Marvin and Alec, clutching each other on the top of a rickety stepladder while at their feet two large furry sausages writhed about in an entirely unthreatening manner.

“Uh,” said Giselle.

“Marvin found their skins and incapacitated them.”

“Makes them mighty difficult to interrogate though.”

“But not so much of a threat,” Alec defended.

Marvin shrugged. “Bundle them up in a couple of tarps, take them back to Alec’s place and dump them in the bathtub with a bit of salt. Should do the trick.”

“Oh, now really. Must it be my apartment? My tub isn’t nearly big enough for a walrus.” Alec protested.

“We’ll be careful. It’s the only way to get a confession out of them. Need to trace the rest of that money.”

“What the hell are you doing on a stepladder with a merman? Naked!” Butch asked in that tone of voice. Apparently, he had finally taken stock of the situation.

Alec sighed. Suddenly he was very tired of hiding everything all the time. His mouth tasted like seal blubber, the man of his dreams was in his arms, and the future just didn’t seem all that bad anymore.

“Kissing him, if you really must know.”

Butch sputtered.

Giselle grinned.

“Would you like a demonstration?” Alec offered. Might as well go for broke.

“No need to press the matter, pup,” warned Fifi in his alpha tone of voice.

Butch, ignoring the walrus, the seal, and the merman, charged down the steep wooden stairs into the basement and leaped at his son, changing form midair in a spectacular display of werewolf prowess. His clothing fell to the floor with a sad little fump.

“Oh, well, that’s just great,” said Alec, falling off the stepladder with his father’s jaw wrapped around his shoulder.

Then he too changed.

Alec had never actually fought his father before. After he became a werewolf he’d fought his brothers, one at a time, and several at once. None of them talked about it, but Alec had kicked their proverbial furry butts. But his Dad was pack beta. And very very big.

He was also, Alec soon found, a tad out of shape and beginning to feel his age.

Alec never understood how any werewolf could lose his human sense along with his human form. It seemed silly simply to let the slavering beast take over. So Alec fought smart, using his intelligence as well as his wolf body. With his father mindlessly attacking, tearing for the throat and scrabbling at his jaw, Alec — quick and nimble — fended off his attack and steered him in a furry, slathering, growing tumble around the basement towards a promising-looking fish tank.

His dad took a particularly nasty nip to the side of the face, under one eye, and backed away, circling his son warily for a moment.

Alec seized the opportunity to dart in at exactly the right moment, and instead of going for a ruff-grabbing bite as one might expect, he nosed under his father’s belly, and heaved upwards, using leverage and supernatural strength to simply flip the wolf over and into the fish tank. There was a tremendous splash and then the glass shattered under Butch’s weight.

Butch took a moment to recover, shaking the glass and water from his coat. He was just about to charge his son again, and Alec was beginning to wonder how he could end this without actually killing Butch, when both Fifi and Biff stepped in.

“Enough, Butch,” said the alpha. “The fight is done. Consider yourself rousted. He’s fighting smart, and we both know what that means.”

Butch crouched down among the remnants of the fish tank and glared at his alpha.

“He’s always fought smart, you just never bothered to ask any of us why we stopped picking on him after he changed. You thought we didn’t test him?”

Marvin and Giselle were occupied trussing up the two barking sea mammals in a couple of tablecloths they’d unearthed from the kitchen stores. But, drawn by the conversation, Marvin wandered over.

Giselle, apparently tired of all the barking, glared the walrus into silent stone stillness. Without him, the harbour seal seemed far more amiable.

“What’s it mean, fighting smart?” Marvin bent down and began scratching Alec’s ears. Alec leaned into the caresses. It was a little lap-dog degrading but it felt wonderful.

“It’s an alpha trait, keeping the brain with the change, as it were.”

“Oh, I thought “alpha” had to do with dominance and size.”

“Size, sometimes. Dominance, definitely. But that has to do with smarts and how you use them.”

Fifi looked down at Alec. “Enough playing, pup.”

Alec sighed and shifted back to human. He found and pulled on his jeans before Marvin could say or do anything rash.

Marvin gave him a very significant look.

Alec looked to Fifi. “So, now that it’s out, what are you going to do about me?”

Fifi shrugged. “I’ve been waiting for you to get your crap together and take on responsibility for your half of the pack for a couple years now. Couldn’t understand what was holding you back.”

Alec winced.

Biff looked at his brother, head cocked to one side thoughtfully. “I can.”

“What’s your interest in this matter?” Alec wanted to know.

“Didn’t you realize it? I’m your beta.”

Alec took a closer look at his brother. It would explain his protective behaviour over the years. “Oh.” I guess he always knew he was a beta, just like I always knew I was an alpha.

“So?” Fifi demanded, one heavy foot resting casually on Butch’s still lupine back, as if he were afraid Alec’s dad would leap up and begin attacking once more.

Biff shrugged, looking significantly at Alec and then Marvin, who’d sidled up behind him and wormed one hand into his.

Alec puffed out his cheeks. “So, I’m gay.”

Butch twitched and growled under Fifi’s foot but did nothing further.

Fifi shrugged. “So?”

“You’re not mad?”

“You’re not making a pass at me, are you? Why should I be?”

Biff said, “We all, well, kinda already knew.”

Alec turned to his brother, voice rising, “Oh really? How long?”

Biff raised both eyebrows. “Well, there was that thing when you were six. I was gnawing on one of Ma’s shoes but you took if away from me because it was Italian.”

Alec’s jaw dropped. “You don’t care?”

Biff shrugged. “Why should I?”

“You aren’t worried about your alpha being, well, you know. .”

“Alec, I just think it’s time you settled down, came out as an alpha, took your piece of the pack, and relocated us. We’ve waited long enough, we’re restless.”

“None of the others care?” Alec was thinking of his brothers and the rest of the younger pack members.

“The ones that do will stay with Fifi. The rest of us don’t give a damn. New generation, Alec, it’s just not an issue anymore. We’re, you know, modern. Though, I don’t know how they’ll feel about the in-laws smelling like fish.”

Marvin grinned at him.

Alec turned to look down at the merman. “So, I come with a bit of baggage.”

Marvin grinned. “Every relationship has its little hurdles.”

“Little? Who you calling little?” Biff glared.

Marvin ignored Biff, nuzzled up against Alec’s neck and gave it a little lick.

Alec jumped slightly. “Behave.” He turned back to Fifi and Biff. “So what do we know about the Bay Area, any packs roaming there?”

Fifi grinned. “Not that I know of. The general feeling on San Francisco, amongst the older pack leaders, is that there are too many, well, you know. .” He trailed off.

Alec shrugged. “Guess I’m the right kind of alpha for the area then.”

Biff grinned. “So you’re in? You’ll do it?”

“Do I have a choice? At least there are still marine biology labs over there.”

Marvin slid an arm around his waist. “Plenty. I may even have influence with one or two of them.”

Alec smiled and looked down at the merman’s blond head. “I suppose to be unexpectedly in love is a nice change from being unexpectedly alive.”

The merman stood up on his toes and kissed him.

Alec wondered what Marvin looked like with a tail. “Man, this is going to be one weird relationship.”

“All the best ones are,” replied his merman boyfriend.