Chapter 18

When Jake woke the next time, the evil gnomes had put away their hammers and chisels. Something soft and squishy rested against his forehead, and when he tilted his head back, it sagged down into his eyes, covering them. He smelled water inside.

Oh, yeah. Rachel had fixed him up with an ice pack. He’d caught a glimpse of it before she’d laid it on his head. He’d seen that kind in cartoons, but never in real life. He’d probably looked like a cartoon wearing the silly thing.

But it had worked like a charm, and so had the ibuprofen. He felt a hundred percent better. Thank you, Rachel.

No response. Yet she had to be close by. The air was filled with her scent.

Nudging the ice pack away from his eyes, he lifted his head to see where she was. Ah, right there beside him, sound asleep and clutching a candy wrapper. He was touched that she’d made a bed on the floor so that she could be close in case he needed her.

She lay curled on her side facing him, strands of her rich brown hair lying across her cheek. She had a smudge of dark chocolate there, too. If he were a man, he could lean over and swipe it clean with his tongue.

Sure, he could do it as a wolf, too, but it wouldn’t be the same. It couldn’t lead to other activities. Gazing at her in the skimpy tank top and cotton pj bottoms, he was motivated to change his designation and change it fast.

Speeding the healing process was a very good reason for that, but he could think of another one. Making love to her again wouldn’t be particularly smart, though. The smart thing would be to wake her up and ask her to pick up some clothes from his house. He could shift while she was gone.

Yep, that’s exactly what he should do. Time to start wrapping up this project. She wasn’t going to blow the whistle on him and the Were community. It wasn’t in her nature, and as she’d said, no one would believe her, anyway. So he had no excuse for hanging around.

What a depressing line of thought. But it made perfect sense, and he was supposed to be an intelligent being. He’d stayed long enough to neutralize her shocking discovery about him. He could go now.

On the other hand, how would it look if he left abruptly? After all she’d done for him, wouldn’t that be rude? He certainly didn’t want to leave her with the impression that he was an ungrateful jerk who accepted her kindness and then took off.

So he couldn’t go yet. He should ease into it. He liked that reasoning so much better. He could shift now and . . . see what developed. Maybe he could show his gratitude in a way that would make them both happy.

But first he had to shift. After the way she’d reacted to it out on the trail, he didn’t want to risk having her wake up in the middle of the action. Leaving the room wasn’t a good option, either. The less he moved his shoulder before he shifted, the less likely he’d make it bleed.

He needed to wake her up. So maybe he would give her cheek a little lick, after all. By stretching his neck, he could just reach her with his tongue.

She woke up with a gasp. “Jake! You scared me. Are you okay? You look better.”

I’m lots better. You cured my hangover.

“I’m glad.” She pushed herself up on one elbow. “I should check your shoulder.”

It’ll be fine. I’m ready to shift, but I . . . I wanted to warn you before I did.

She looked into his eyes. “Thank you.”

You can leave the room if you want.

“I want to stay right here.” Her gaze didn’t waver from his.

You’re sure?

“Yes.”

Then here goes. Lying back on the quilt, he closed his eyes and willed his shift. It would take longer than usual because he was weakened by the bullet wound, but once he’d accomplished it, he’d regain most of that strength.

For the second time in his life, he was shifting in front of a human. He’d never expected to do it once. This morning he’d been desperate to shock her, and she’d admitted to being freaked-out.

She was obviously still unnerved by the process. He could feel her nervous energy, and it distracted him. But he had to admire her courage. She could have left the room and she’d chosen not to.

Taking a deep breath, he blocked his awareness of her as best he could and concentrated on his transformation. He’d shifted hundreds of times, maybe even thousands, and he was good at it. Adverse conditions no longer affected him. He could shift anywhere, anytime.

Except now. Opening his eyes, he gazed at her.

“Jake? Is something wrong?”

I can’t do it.

“You can’t shift? You mean your shifter is broken?”

Not permanently, I hope. I think . . . it’s you.

“Me? But you did it in front of me this morning.”

I was in a different mood then. I was trying to prove something. Now I’m not.

Her silver eyes grew troubled. “Then I guess you want me to leave the room, huh?”

She sounded so disappointed that he didn’t have the heart to send her away. It would be like denying her fireworks on the Fourth of July. No, please stay.

“But I’m making you choke. You’re having shiftus interruptus.”

You make it sound like erectile dysfunction.

“It sort of is, right?”

I beg your pardon. I don’t have those problems.

“Then why aren’t you shifting?”

He thought about that. Maybe, although it was counterintuitive, he needed her to be even closer to him so that he didn’t think of her as other. He decided to give that a whirl.

I want you to touch me while I shift.

“Touch you? Won’t that make it worse?”

Maybe not. Put your hand on me. Let’s see what happens.

She scooted closer and rested her hand on his paw. “How’s that?”

Good. If it works, I’ll end up holding your hand. Now help me concentrate.

“Want me to close my eyes, too?”

That would miss the point of you being able to watch, wouldn’t it?

“Oh, yeah. Guess so.”

Okay, here we go again. He closed his eyes. Instead of trying to block Rachel, he focused on the connection—her hand resting on his paw. He drew on that connection and felt a surge of energy rush through his body.

She gasped but didn’t move her hand. Her touch was light, allowing the shift to happen under her fingertips, but he felt something resembling an electrical charge pulsing at that point of contact. Muscle and bone responded with a speed and grace he’d never felt before. His heart ached with the beauty of it and the joy of sharing this moment with her.

And then it was over. Dazed and breathing hard, he lay on the quilt. Her fingers rested on the back of his hand instead of the back of his paw. Without opening his eyes, he turned his hand over and laced his fingers through hers.

She squeezed his hand.

He started to say something and realized emotion clogged his throat, preventing him from talking. The past two minutes had been the most emotionally moving of his entire life.

“Are you okay?” she asked softly.

He nodded, still struggling with the enormity of his feelings. He might have seriously miscalculated. He’d meant to solve a simple problem of shifting blockage. But he’d created an even bigger problem.

Less than twenty minutes ago he’d been calculating how soon he could leave her. But during this shift, he’d forged a bond so strong he couldn’t imagine ever doing that. And he would have to.

“Jake, you’re worrying me. Is your shoulder bothering you? It looks really good from here, but if you have a lot of pain, then—”

He opened his eyes and gazed at her. “I’m fine.” He cleared his throat. “But that was the most intense shift I’ve ever had.”

“You were glowing pretty bright. There was heat, too.”

Still holding her hand, he rolled to his side to face her. “I’ll bet.”

“Why do you think it was so intense?”

“You were touching me. Your energy shot through my system and I felt supercharged.” He held up their clasped hands. “I can still feel the tingle.”

“So can I. I thought it might just be me, though.”

“No, it’s both of us.” As he gazed at her, the energy coursing between them took a sensual turn.

Although only their hands touched, her pupils darkened as if he’d begun stroking her breasts and thighs. Her lips parted and her breathing changed tempo. Her throat moved in a slow swallow, and beneath her thin tank top, her nipples thrust against the material.

His body responded immediately. His balls tightened and his cock grew hard. “Lie with me, Rachel.”

She moistened her lips in an unconsciously provocative gesture. “I will.” Her voice was low and sultry. “But first, I’m going to touch you. I’m going to worship this body that just appeared before my eyes. You’re such a mystery to me, Jake. I want to know you.”

He inhaled sharply, from both excitement and a dash of apprehension. He wanted her touch, wanted it desperately. Perhaps too desperately. He couldn’t shake the feeling that they were crossing some sort of line, one that he hadn’t meant to cross at all.

But no red-blooded male could resist the promise in Rachel’s silvery eyes as she gently slipped her fingers free and rose to her knees. In an instant she’d disposed of her tank top. Then she slid out of her pj bottoms.

“Lie back,” she murmured.

Holding her gaze, he did as he was told, his heart hammering as she crawled onto his makeshift bed. Her eyes smoldered with repressed heat. Straddling him, she started with his mouth.

Her kiss held nothing back. She plundered his mouth with her tongue and nipped his lower lip with her teeth. Last night he’d stripped away her civilized veneer, and now that wild creature was back, ready to do the same to him.

He was used to being in control, but she didn’t seem inclined to allow that. When he reached for her, she grasped his hands and pinned them beside his head. He started to resist, and she lifted her mouth from his and tightened her hold.

“I know you could overpower me easily. But let me be in charge, werewolf.” Leaning down, she brushed her taut nipples over his chest.

His breath hissed out as he fought the urge to grab her and drive his rigid penis into her waiting warmth. He knew she was ready for him. His sense of smell told him all he needed to know.

But she’d made a request. Although it scrambled his brain to turn over control, especially to a human female, he would do it because she deserved that. She’d proven herself strong and true. If she wanted to be in charge, she would be.

As if sensing his complete surrender, she laughed softly. “Good. Now we’ll have some fun.”

With that, she proceeded to turn him inside out. Using her lips, her tongue, her teeth, her fingers, and her breasts, she caressed him without mercy. She turned him into a seething mass of frustration, and all because she carefully avoided touching his aching cock and throbbing balls.

Her laughing eyes found his. “How are we doing, werewolf?”

He growled. He wasn’t proud of making that sort of primitive sound, but it fit his mood perfectly. Only one part of his body remained untouched, and he wanted her mouth there. Now. Or five minutes ago would have been even better.

“Ah, you seem a little upset. Maybe I can do something about that.” She placed her lips where he’d been longing to have them and gave him a sweet kiss right on the tip.

He groaned.

“More?”

“Rachel, so help me . . .”

“I want to help you, Jake. Is this what you had in mind?” She ran her tongue from base to tip. And stopped.

He gasped. “You’re making me crazy.”

“That’s my goal.”

“Do you want me to beg?”

“Sure.”

He gulped for air. “Rachel, please take my cock into your sweet mouth. Please.”

“Be glad to.” And she did, while fondling his family jewels at the same time. Her attentions were so thorough that he almost came. Twice.

“That’s . . . enough.” He sucked air into his tortured lungs. “I’m right on the edge.”

“Me, too.” With one last swipe of her tongue she released him. “And I want this, too.” Straddling his hips, she took what he offered and moaned softly as she slid downward.

The sensation was so great he simply reveled in it for several long seconds.

She leaned forward and brushed her lips over his. “You good?”

“More than good,” he mumbled.

“I’m going to move.”

“Please do.”

“You can join in if you want now.”

He hesitated. This was her show, after all. “You’re sure?”

“Absolutely.” She began a rhythmic motion with her hips. “Participation is welcome.”

That was all he needed. Bracketing her hips with both hands, he synchronized his movements to hers. Beautiful. The pressure mounted within him, but it was a sweet pressure. A welcome pressure. He’d tried to hold it back for too long.

But now he felt her reaching for her climax, and at last he could let go. With a cry of triumph, she took him deeper and found her nirvana. He followed her over the edge as he drove upward and abandoned himself to the wonder of loving Rachel.

Afterward, she slumped against him, her breath labored and her skin slick. Wrapping his arms around her, he eased her down, coaxing her to relax and let him support her. He felt her go boneless with contentment.

He should probably be worried about the close bond developing between them. But when he was filled with joy and satisfaction, he had a tough time being worried about anything. Maybe someday he’d regret his openness with Rachel. But this wasn’t that day.

They lay there together for a long time, and he was content to let her choose the moment they would move. Her body was warm and comforting against his, and he could have stayed that way without complaint for hours.

Eventually, though, she stirred and propped herself on her elbows to gaze at him. “I like being in charge.”

He chuckled. “I noticed.”

“No, really. I understand that you’re probably an alpha male who expects to be in command of the situation, but I congratulate you on holding back.”

“Alpha male? Where did you come up with that term?”

She smiled and traced the line of his jaw with one finger. “I had some time on my hands while I was pacing the floor worrying about you, so I got on the computer and researched wolves.”

“I’m not a—”

She laid a finger over his mouth. “I know you’re not a wolf, but you have packs the way wolves do, and surely there are some similarities.”

“Yes, there are.”

“You mentioned that Duncan MacDowell’s mate is in line to be the alpha of her pack.”

“She is.” He found her interest flattering. “But what makes you think I’m an alpha? I’m not in command of any pack.”

“That’s true.” She cupped his face in one hand and gazed at him. “But I have the distinct feeling you would like that, Jake Hunter. You’re a born leader. You’d be very good as a pack alpha.”

“It’s a nice compliment, but I’m not going to challenge my pack alpha, a Were named Keegan, who happens to be doing a great job.”

“You have a pack?”

“Sure. All werewolves do. I belong to the Hunter pack based in Idaho.”

She looked puzzled. “That’s not very close. Do you ever see them?”

“Sometimes.” He shrugged. “I’ve always felt more like a Wallace, I guess, although the Wallace pack doesn’t exist anymore in Alaska. The Were community maintains the Wallace museum near Sitka, but that’s about all that’s left. Anyway, I like it here. It feels right to me.”

“Hmm.”

“What?”

She propped her chin on her fist. “I’m sure I’m not telling you something you don’t already know, but sometimes, in the wolf world, a young alpha goes off and starts his own pack.”

“Yeah, so?”

“Why not do that, Jake?”

It was a stunning concept. As much as he enjoyed his independence, he’d thought about the advantages of having his own pack nearby. He’d wondered if his mate, whoever she turned out to be, would go along with staying here, even though his pack was in Idaho.

“It’s a good idea, isn’t it, Jake?”

“I don’t know. I’m still thinking about it.” A pack of his own. The beginning of a dynasty. Yeah, he liked it. She was right about him. He was an alpha, which might be one reason he’d organized WARM.

But WARM was not a pack. It was a social movement. Rachel was suggesting a true wolf pack, of which he would be the alpha. He couldn’t create a pack without a mate, however.

He gazed into her silver eyes and knew exactly what she was thinking. But it violated every belief he held. She might have come up with a life-changing idea, but that didn’t mean she should be a part of it.

Yet she was the only one he could imagine by his side.

Enough. It was past time to end a discussion that had nothing to do with her and gently disentangle himself from a situation that could go nowhere. He wouldn’t leave abruptly, but he would leave.

“You’ve given me a lot to think about,” he said. “Thanks for that.”

“You’re welcome.”

“I don’t know about you, but I’m starving.”

“Sure. Let’s eat.” But the sparkle had faded in her eyes. She obviously knew he’d changed the subject on purpose because he didn’t want to continue discussing his future plans with her.

And so their parting would begin. Maybe he should leave abruptly, after all. Quick might be more merciful than slow. Perhaps she should have a say in that.

“Rachel, you know how this is going to end, right?”

“I know how you plan for it to end.”

He kept his gaze locked with hers. “It will end with me leaving Polecat. I’ll put my cabin up for sale, but I don’t intend to stick around and wait for a buyer to come along. I’ll let a real estate agent handle it for me.”

She swallowed but didn’t say anything.

“I’m telling you this straight out because I . . . care about you. A lot.”

“I care about you, too.” Her voice was husky.

“I know now I can trust you not to breach werewolf security.”

“Thank you for that.”

His voice softened. “I’ve never really thought you would, but my knee-jerk reaction was to keep you close until I was sure.”

“So I’m free now to go about my life?” Her smile was faint.

“We both are. So I’m asking you . . . would you like me to leave right now?”

“You can’t, unless you can fit into my jeans.”

He laughed. It was a damned serious situation, and yet he couldn’t help it.

Then she started laughing, too. “God, I’d love to see that!”

They laughed until the tears came. It felt good. And finally, they both stared at each other with silly grins on their faces.

She wiped her eyes and sniffed. “Tell you what. I’ll drive over to your place and bring you some clothes.”

“I’d appreciate that.”

“But if you don’t mind, I’d rather you didn’t leave just yet.”

“You’re sure? Because I don’t want to make this any worse than it already is.”

She looked into his eyes. “When you leave, it will be the worst day of my life. It doesn’t matter if that’s today, tomorrow, or a week from now. I’ll hate that day because it’ll be the last time I’ll ever see you.”

He nodded slowly.

“So can I be greedy and ask for a little more time?”

“Yeah.” He leaned forward and kissed her. “Because I want to be greedy, too.”

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