Before We Fall

Chapter Seven

Dominic

After I dump the disgusting cans of old spit down the even more disgusting bathroom sinks, I take them back out to the gym, pausing for a minute as I stare at Jacey. As much as I hate to give her attention, it’s hard not to notice her here, especially when she’s thrust herself in the middle of a group of at-risk kids and her face is pressed into a punching bag as one of the boys punches at it.

Especially when I walk past her and she smells like apples, crisp and clean.

She’s as out of place in this dirty sweatbox as anyone I’ve ever seen.

She’s got that girl-next-door quality that is so underrated among women. They all want to be glamorous bombshells, overly made-up and too sexed out. But even though Jacey is wearing makeup and short workout shorts, she’s the classic girl next door, even if that’s not her goal.

I bend and replace a spit can next to one of her toned legs, and she glances down at me, her eyes warm and sparkling.

For a minute, there’s something in her expression, something mischievous, but she doesn’t say anything. Instead, she just braces for another punch from the gigantic kid pummeling the bag she’s holding. It’s taking all of her weight to hold it still, but she’s doing it. I can’t help but be impressed.

Mainly because not only is she holding it, but she’s not intimidated by him, either. She’s half his size, but she just marched right out here and jumped in, just like she jumped in between Cris and me. Completely unafraid.

The kid she’s with looks like he could eat her for breakfast, and every time he punches, it practically knocks her into the wall. But she still holds on.

She’s stubborn, I’ll give her that much. And fearless.

Why I’m thinking about her at all, though, I don’t fucking know. Annoyed with myself, I turn around and head to the other side of the room.

That’s when I hear the commotion.

Snapping around, I turn just in time to see the kid grab at Jacey’s chest, his tape-wrapped fingers twisting her T-shirt and yanking her toward him. For a split second, my heart hammers as I watch the juvenile delinquent manhandling her. The kid is giant, and Jacey is extremely small.

But there’s no time for me or anyone else to react before Jacey spins out of his grasp in one deft move, swinging her leg around in a surprisingly powerful roundhouse kick to his chest, knocking him onto his back.

I’m utterly stunned and so is she. I can see it on her face as she stands over him, her hands clenched and shaking at her sides as she balances one tennis shoe lightly on his neck.

“Don’t touch me like that again!” she snaps at him. “I’m here to help you, but that doesn’t give you the right to grope me.”

By now, activity in the gym has halted, and every eye is on Jacey and the kid on the floor. You can hear a pin drop in this place.

The kid is still and silent as he looks up at her, and unconsciously I start to move toward Jacey. Even though I don’t want to be involved with her or anything else, I can’t leave her there by herself. I’m not completely heartless.

But then the kid smiles, even though Jacey’s foot is still on his neck.

“If you let me up, I’ll behave,” he promises. Jacey stares down at him uncertainly, but after a second, she lifts her foot. The kid climbs to his feet, holding his hand out to Jacey.

She eyes him hesitantly.

“I’m sorry,” the kid tells her, smiling again. “My name’s Jake. There’s no hard feelings, right? I was just messin’ with you.”

Jacey stares at him and I stop a few steps away.

“I guess not,” she finally answers. “No hard feelings. Just don’t do that again. I can take care of myself.”

“Fuck, yeah, you can,” the kid agrees. “Where did you learn to do that?”

Jacey shrugs, relaxing slightly even though she still keeps an eye on the boy.

“My brother’s an Army Ranger. He taught me a lot of things. One of those things is how to shoot, and I have a 9mm in my bed stand. It might be pink, but it shoots just as straight as a regular one.”

I can’t help but chuckle now, at both the thought of this tiny chick with a pink gun by her bed and at the look on Jake’s face.

“No worries,” he tells her quickly. “I don’t have any plans to break into your house. No need to threaten me with your pink gun.”

I hear chuckling around me from the kids, and Jacey relaxes.

“Good. I just thought I’d let you know.”

“Jake!” Joe’s voice booms through the gym, and I glance over to find him standing in his office doorway, a pissed look on his face. “Get in here.”

Jake turns slowly and Joe looks at Jacey.

“You okay?” he calls to her.

She nods and so does he. “Good. And nice rotation on that kick, young lady.”

Jacey smiles now, a real smile that spreads to her eyes. “Thanks.”

Jake disappears reluctantly into Joe’s office, his shoulders slumped, and the door closes behind them. Jacey stands limply for a minute, probably trying to decide what to do now… now that she’s shown the entire gym that she’s an unlikely badass. Noise resumes around us as everyone goes back to their business.

I look at her.

“That was impressive,” I admit quietly, because it’s the truth. “You looked like a stuntwoman. Or a ninja.”

Jacey laughs a warm laugh, real and husky, as she walks toward me, closing the three-foot gap between us.

“Thanks,” she tells me. “I guess those endless self-defense classes with my brother paid off. I used to think that he just wanted to inflict pain on me, but maybe there was rhyme to his reason.”

She’s unflustered now, once again sure of herself. She tucks a stray lock of her blond hair behind her ear, and I can’t help but notice her plump lips. They’re just the right size to nip at. The tip of her tongue pokes out, licking her lips, and I swallow.

Must distract myself.

“Your brother’s really a Ranger?” I ask, refocusing myself. “Because that’s badass shit. If he trained you, it’s no wonder you can take down a guy twice your size.”

Jacey smiles, hovering near my elbow. Close enough to touch, but I don’t. Close enough to inhale, so I do, filling my lungs with the scent of apples.

She’s a breath of fresh air, whether I want to admit it or not.

“Yeah, he is. Or he was until a year or so ago. He is pretty badass.”

I’m getting ready to reply when a group of guys headed for the locker room stop off beside us.

“Dude, are you really Dominic Kinkaide?” one of them asks, his face dubious. I smile what I hope is a patient smile.

“Yeah, that’s me,” I answer. I can feel Jacey watching the exchange with interest, but she remains silent. The kid grins.

“Dude. I loved Annihilated. That was some crazy shit! Did you do your own stunts?”

I nod, and the kids start chattering eagerly, asking me questions about leaping from a helicopter and how I’d managed to flip my jet ski over backward. One of them runs to Joe’s office to get paper for autographs, and the group grows from three guys to fifteen.

The kid runs back and hands me a stack of scratch paper, and I start scrawling my name, handing an autograph to each boy surrounding me. As I do, I see Jacey slip away from the ruckus. A part of me is disappointed by that. I’m fascinated by the Jacey that just laid Jake out flat on his back.

I want to know more about her, because she seems different from the Jacey who works at Saffron.

After five minutes or so, Joe sticks his head out of his office and barks at the boys.

“Hey! You’re not here to get autographs. Let the man do his job and you guys get back to work!”

The kids sheepishly disperse, going back to their punching bags or to the locker room, and I head to the weight room to wipe down the seats. When I get there, I find Jacey already crouched by a machine, cleaning it. When I walk in, she glances up at me and smiles.

“So that’s your life?”

I shrug. “Most of the time. It’s why I don’t go out much. It’s just part of it.”

I grab a rag and help her, cleaning the other side of the machine she’s working on.

“Well, I think it’s awesome,” she answers. “Everyone loves you. That must be an amazing feeling.”

I snort. “Yeah. Everyone loves me. Jacey, no one knows me. Not really. They know my face. They know the roles that I play. But they don’t know me. That’s okay, though. It’s how I like it.”

Jacey shakes her head. “That’s depressingly lonely, Dominic.”

“Not really,” I mutter, bending next to her to grab the bottle of sanitizer. As I do, she wrinkles up her nose.

“Jesus. You smell like sex. Did you come straight from a whorehouse?”

I feel myself flush, just a bit, because she caught me dead to rights.

Visions of the girl-on-girl action I was a part of just before I came here flash through my head. I hadn’t taken the time for a shower because I was late enough already.

Busted.

Jacey shakes her head in… what? Disappointment? Disgust?

Before I can figure out her reaction, she walks away, breaking whatever moment we’d been having and leaving me staring after her in astonishment as she exits the room. No one ever walks away from me like that.

But she just did.

Not only that, but she’s not looking back, either. She’s not so impressed with who I am that she’ll overlook any fault that I might have. Interesting… and unusual.

As I stare at her shoulder blades, I realize it’s possible that there might be more to this girl than I thought.

Yeah… no, there’s probably not.

I decide this a few hours later as I walk into the parking lot at the end of my shift, after scrubbing toilets, refilling ice packs, and wiping graffiti off the wall.

It’s clear that she’s exactly like I thought she was.

Kaylie, the girl from the party the other night, is dressed in her tiny server’s uniform, and she tosses a bag at Jacey as Jacey piles into Kaylie’s little convertible.

Then, right in the parking lot, Jacey hunches down in the seat and changes her clothes.

Seriously?

I can’t see anything, but I know what she’s doing. And so would the boys in the gym, if any of them happened to look outside. What the fuck is she thinking? One leg extends high into the air, her toes pointed to the sky, as Jacey slips her workout shorts off and her tiny uniform shorts on. The flimsy material sliding over her long legs leaves little to the imagination.

Does she want to invite trouble? A boy’s imagination is as good as the real thing, often times better. So to give them a glimpse like this is only going to make them want to see more.

But maybe that’s what she wants. And maybe that’s why she’s exactly the kind of girl I thought she was. An attention-whore and a tease, which makes total sense given her job.

I stop for a second and watch.

Because that’s what I like to do.

Her shirt comes off, and I get a hint of a slender shoulder, the top of her bra, the curve of her arm. Then she’s busy fastening the hooks of her skimpy corset, which pushes her tits upward and together, before she adjusts her yellow bow tie.

Something about the situation… the fact that Jacey is undressing in a very public place, the fact that I like to watch… and the fact that Jacey has a smoking-hot body incites a reaction from my dick and it hardens against my leg.

I hate that I react at all, physical or otherwise, because I wouldn’t touch this girl with Sin’s dick, let alone mine. There’s trouble in the way she so clearly needs so much attention. I mean, she works a job where she is half-dressed for the pleasure of men, for god’s sake. I want nothing to do with her, or anyone like her. Yet here I am with a stiff dick.

It’s at this moment that she turns and tosses her bag into the tiny backseat and her eyes meet mine. She pauses, and I can almost hear the breath as it rushes over her lips with surprise. I can almost see the question in her dark eyes as they widen. Did he just see me undress?

But just as quickly as her eyes widen at seeing me, they narrow into a slant and fill with one thing as the car speeds out of the parking lot, the radio blasting.

Disdain.

I don’t know whether to laugh or be annoyed. She’s the one undressing in the parking lot of a youth center in front of testosterone-fueled boys and heading off to a job where she gets paid to flirt with men… not me. Her disdain should be for herself.

I feel like an old man as I tiredly crawl into my Porsche, letting my head rest against the seat for a second, absorbing the spring sun and the fresh breeze before I fire up the engine. As I do, my phone rings and Sin’s name flashes on my screen.

“Yes?” I answer as I back out of my parking spot.

“Dude, I just found out that Amy Ashby is coming to my party tonight. Aren’t you costarring with her in your next gig?”

“Seriously?” I have to admit, I’m surprised. Amy Ashby, super-starlet, hardly ever ventures out of California. She doesn’t see the need. To her, all intelligent life ends at the California–Nevada border.

“Yeah,” Sin answers. “She’s dating a Blackhawk now, apparently, which is a shame because I’d like to motorboat those tits of hers. Are they real? I know you know. You had a sex scene with her in Visceral Need. I know you tapped that ass. You must’ve.”

For just a second, I think about that film, the one that shot both me and Amy to superstardom. And of course, I think about that sex scene. It was my first on-screen sex scene and hers too. We joked that we were popping each other’s cherry. Her tits aren’t real, but I don’t tell Sin.

“You’re ridiculous,” I tell him instead. “And fuck, man. How many parties do you need to have a week?”

Sin chuckles. “Don’t hate. But hey, I just thought of something. Is this going to cause a problem? Because Kira is coming tonight too. I know that Amy likes to have your undivided attention—whether she has a boyfriend or not.”

I sigh. “Amy is definitely high maintenance. But that shouldn’t cause a problem with Kira, because she knows where she and I stand. We’re convenient. That’s it. But knowing it and knowing it are two different things, and she’ll probably get jealous and throw some sort of fit. Why’d you invite her, anyway? I don’t want to babysit.”

“Because she wanted me to call her for my next party,” Sin replies, and I can almost hear him shrugging. It’s not his problem, so he’s not concerned. “And when the fuck did having a fuck-buddy turn into babysitting? Whatever, dude. We’ll make it work.”

An idea occurs to me and I grin.

“Oh, it’ll work. I’ll go home tonight for dinner. Mom’s been wanting to feed me, anyway. Have fun at the party.”

Sin starts to protest, but I hang up on him and turn the car around, heading the opposite direction toward Palos Park, the Chicago suburb that I grew up in.

The Chicago streets turn into the highway, which eventually runs through Palos Park. The quiet streets that I ran on when I was a kid surround me and I take in the quiet scenery as I drive through town to the country. Castle Kinkaide sits on ten acres outside of town and I can see the spire of the tower a mile away.

Honestly, I can’t help but smile. For the most part, I had an awesome childhood and I have great memories of growing up out here in the middle of nowhere, in a house that everyone around considers a gigantic novelty.

As I pull onto the long drive, surrounded on both sides by flowering trees, I take a deep breath of country air and exhale it. I always forget how good it smells here, but once I’m back, it brings back instant memories. Summer nights chasing lightning bugs, camping out with my dad and brothers, and swinging from a rope swing out by the stream.

It was a surprisingly rural upbringing in a town only a few miles from Chicago. As I climb out of my car, I hear Fiona and my mother… their voices drift toward me on the breeze, and I turn to find them walking from the garage into the house. Fuck.

How had I forgotten that Fiona is staying with my parents while her new condo downtown is being renovated? Mother fuck.

Fiona looks up and sees me first, and for the briefest of moments her eyes light up the way they usually do when she sees me. I’ve always been her favorite.

But not now. Now her expression immediately hardens and she pointedly looks in the other direction, a not-so-subtle way of reminding me that I’m on her shit list.

Whatever.

She’s on my shit list. She can ignore me as long as she wants. I can guarantee that I’ve got more patience than she does.

As they walk up the steps into the house, Mom turns her head and drops the sack she’s carrying as soon as she sees me. She runs toward me like she hasn’t seen me in a year. It’s only been a few months, but you’d think it was an eternity by the way she barrels into me and clutches me tight. Her head barely reaches my sternum, but she buries it there, her hands clasped behind me.

“Dominic James Kinkaide,” she scolds. “You’ve been away too long this time. You’re getting too thin. You’re not eating.”

She looks up at me, her blue eyes snapping. “You get yourself inside and wash up. Dinner’s in thirty minutes, and you’re going to eat everything I put on your plate.”

She marches ahead of me, trying to pretend that she’s angry and not happy to see me. But her eyes betray her, because when she stops to let me open the door for her, they’re warm.

“It’s about time you came home,” she tells me as she walks past. “Go see your father. He’s in the library.”

Fiona ignores me so I ignore her, walking past her into the long hall that leads to the library that serves as my dad’s study. When I round the doorway, I find him staring out the window, a glass of scotch in his hand.

“Hey, Dad,” I greet him quietly. “Can I get one of those?”

My father turns his head and smiles at me, his temples a little grayer than the last time I was home.

“Hey, Dom. Sure, help yourself. It’ll put hair on your chest.”

I chuckle because it’s the same thing he always says and help myself to a glass. The fiery liquid burns a trail down into my gut and I down the entire thing, then pour another.

“What happened the other night?” Dad asks without preamble. “You can’t go around assaulting people. I don’t care how pissed you are.”

I shrug. “I just found out that Fiona’s dating Cris. I don’t appreciate it and I told her so.”

Dad raises an eyebrow. “And then you showed Cris with your fists? I always told you, Dom… I don’t want you to start things. You can always finish them, but don’t start them.”

I shake my head and set my glass down. “Cris started this long ago, Dad. And there’s going to come a point where I need to finish it. For real.”

My father levels his green gaze at me. “You ever going to tell us what the hell happened with you two? He spent almost as much time here growing up as you did. If there’s something I need to know, I’d appreciate knowing it.”

My gut tightens.

It’s not that I don’t want to tell them. It’s that I can’t. I can’t fucking talk about it. Every time I try, the words freeze in my chest and they won’t pass my tongue. They’re just too fucking ugly to say.

My father raises an eyebrow. “Well?”

I shake my head. “It’s between him and me. If Fiona doesn’t want to listen, that’s her problem.”

Dad rolls his eyes and downs his whiskey. “I thought you’d say that. I’m sure you’ll be happy to know that he’s coming tonight. We didn’t know you were or we wouldn’t have invited him.”

I stare at him dumbly. I shouldn’t be surprised. I didn’t even call to tell them I was coming. But still. It’s my fucking home and I shouldn’t have to tiptoe around wondering when and if Cris fucking Evans will be here.

Shit.

“Great,” I mumble. “It’s been good seeing you.” I stand up and turn to walk out.

“Don’t start that shit,” my dad warns. “You should’ve called to tell us you were coming.”

I know he’s right, so I don’t say anything. Instead, I excuse myself to call Tally.

“Any news?” I ask him. He sighs into the phone.

“They’re not happy, but there’s not much to be done about it. They’ll delay filming and they’ll film as much as they can without you. They’re wanting you to come home on the weekends though, to film. You’re gonna have to make that work.”

“I’ll get my lawyers on it,” I answer. “I can’t see that would be a problem. I don’t have to be at Joe’s on the weekends.”

“What’s it like, anyway?” Tally asks curiously. “Community service?”

I think about the dingy gym and roll my eyes.

“It’s awesome,” I answer sarcastically. “You should come and help.”

“Nah, I think I’ll just see you when you get your ass back here. Hurry it up. I’ll tell the studio to expect you soon. I know Amy Ashby is pissed. This is going to throw off her schedule for her next film, too. You’re going to have to smooth things over.”

“She’s actually at my brother’s tonight,” I tell him grudgingly. “I could’ve seen her, but I’ll do it another time. I’m not in the mood.”

“You’re never in the mood,” Tally grumbles. “That’s why she’s pissed at you.”

That’s also true. If Amy had her way, we’d rehearse our sex scenes in my trailer, down to licking each other’s nipples and getting each other off. But I don’t feel the need. And I just don’t fucking want to. She’s another one of those high-maintenance party girls who needs attention all the time. I just can’t deal with that.

I hang up and head back down the hall, glancing at the framed family pictures as I pass. Pics of me, Sin, Duncan, Kira, Fiona, Cris… and Emma.

I stop for a second, the air whooshing from my lungs as I stare at Emma’s sparkling blue eyes staring back at me from one particularly painful picture.

She’s tanned and healthy, and she’s wrapped her arm around my neck a second before my mom snapped the picture of us in our graduation caps. It was the last picture we’d taken together.

It was the last picture she’d ever take.

A knot forms in my throat as I stare at the necklace she’s wearing, a gift I had given her. A happy-graduation/I-love-you/can’t-wait-to-go-to-college-with-you gift. A teardrop-shaped aquamarine that perfectly matches the color of her eyes is encased in a white shell that she’d plucked from Lake Michigan. I’d had it made especially for her, and she’d worn it until the day she died.

I reach into my pocket and wrap my fingers around it, feeling the cool stone.

Her parents gave it to me afterward, and I’ve carried it in my pocket every day since… because it reminds me.

Of everything.

I gulp and yank my hand away from it, like it’s a hot coal that will burn me. My problem is that I’m stuck in limbo… I don’t want to remember and I don’t want to forget. If I remember, it hurts like hell. But if I forget, it might happen again.

And that’s one thing I know for sure.

I’ll never let myself get fucked over like that again.