Best Laid Plans: A Summer Camp Swingers Novel

Chapter 5

I dusted breadcrumbs from my hands and then nudged the plate away.

“You don’t want your chips?” Mom said.

“No thanks. Too greasy.”

“You are turning into a health nut.”

“My body is a temple,” I said flippantly.

“Your body’s fine. I still say you could stand to gain a few pounds.”

“And I say I work really hard not to. Besides, weren’t you the one who said she’s watching her girlish figure?”

“I’m supposed to be thin and lovely. You’re supposed to be big and manly.” She almost said it with a straight face.

I rolled my eyes. “C’mon, let’s get back to work.”

“Do you want me to get the sunscreen?”

“So you think I’m going to take off my shirt?” I teased.

“I will if you will.”

My eyebrows shot up.

“Why not? What’s the point of having a private backyard if you can’t enjoy it?”

“Fine by me.”

“I’ll grab the sunscreen and meet you outside,” she said.

I went out to the patio through the living room door. She emerged from the master bedroom door about a minute later. She brandished a tube of Bain de Soleil.

“You want me to do you?” She was talking about the sunscreen, but I didn’t miss the double entendre.

“Um… sure.” I pulled off my T-shirt and turned my back to her. She spread the cream over my shoulders first. Then she worked down my back.

“This makes me think of when you were a boy,” she said. “You always burned so easily.”

“I still do. It’s annoying. Why couldn’t I get your complexion instead of Dad’s?”

“Well, you inherited your Dad’s good looks too, so you can’t really complain. Turn around, I’ll do your front.”

I obeyed out of habit.

“You’re a lot bigger than you used to be,” she said as she covered my arms and chest. “More muscular too.”

“See? All that healthy food Christy makes me eat.”

“She doesn’t really ‘make’ you, does she?”

“No, but it’s easier to eat whatever she does. I mean, I’m not going to give up Coke or steak any time soon, but the rest is actually good for me. I tease her about eating ‘bunny food,’ but I don’t mind.”

“I still think you’re too thin.”

“And I think I don’t ever want to be pudgy again.”

“You weren’t pudgy. Besides, it was just baby fat.”

“On a fifteen-year old? Mom, that’s hardly a baby.”

“I thought you were cute.”

“And now?”

“Very handsome,” she said as she finished my stomach. Then she glanced at my sweatpants. “You going to take those off too?”

My eyebrows rose again. “Excuse me?”

“I’m kidding,” she said, although we both knew she wasn’t. All of a sudden she handed me the tube of sunscreen. “Here,” she said as she pulled off her own shirt, “you can do me.”

Her breasts sprang into view. I’d seen them hundreds of times, maybe thousands, but I never grew tired of looking at bare breasts, even if they were my mother’s. They’d sagged a little over the years, but they were still round and full, with medium-sized areolae and thick nipples. She paused for a moment, as if she wanted me to look, before she turned her back to me.

Her skin was pale from the winter, with a light dusting of freckles across her shoulders and upper chest. She swept her hair aside so I could cover her neck and shoulders. She tanned much easier than I did, so I wondered why she was bothering.

Then I realized that she wanted me to touch her. But we had rules about that. We were swingers, so we’d seen each other have sex, but that didn’t extend to sex with each other. Sure, we’d fooled around before, but that had been years earlier.

I coated her back with sunscreen and then worked toward her waist. Then I covered her shoulders and arms. I deliberately came close to her breasts several times, although never enough to raise an eyebrow. Still, we were both aware that I was teasing her. Then I decided to continue the innuendo where she’d left off.

“Turn around. I’ll do your front.”

“Ha! No, that’s all right. I can do it. The rules, you know.”

“Rules were made to be broken,” I shot back.

“Mmm, not yet.” She accepted the tube of sunscreen, squirted a line of orangish cream into her palm, and casually coated her breasts. Then, just as casually, she asked, “How would you feel about going all the way?”

My eyes didn’t quite pop out of their sockets, but not for lack of trying.

“You know,” she added with a grin, “nude gardening.”

“Oh! I thought—”

“Thought what?”

“Don’t act innocent,” I said.

“Who, me?”

I rolled my eyes. “Nude gardening, huh?”

“Sure. What did you think I meant?”

“You know,” I said darkly.

“What if I did mean the other?”

I didn’t think she was serious, but I played along anyway. “What about the rules?”

“Rules’re made to be broken.”

“Now you’re just messing with me.”

She paused for a moment but then laughed. “You’re right. I’m sorry. I couldn’t resist.”

“Try harder.”

“I’m serious about the nude gardening, though. We’ll be much cooler.”

“Fine by me,” I said without thinking. “Um… although…”

She raised an eyebrow.

“Aw, what the heck.” I untied the drawstring on my sweatpants. I shucked them and my boxers in the same motion. I sat on the edge of the deck before Mom could say anything. Then I avoided her stare by concentrating on the sweatpants’ elastic cuff around my ankle.

“That’s a new look,” she said when she recovered.

“Um, yeah.” I tugged one leg free. “Christy likes me to shave.”

“Completely?” Mom said, although it was obvious.

“Well, it’s only fair. I like her to shave. So…” I pulled off the other leg and tossed the sweatpants onto a nearby chair. Then I stood in all my glory, hairless from the neck down. (I still had hair on my arms and legs, and a little patch around my navel, but that was it. My pubic hair was day-old stubble, no more.)

“You look even bigger without hair,” Mom said before she realized it.

I chuckled and decided not to tell her that I was semi-hard from all the innuendo and sexual tension.

“Sorry,” she said at last. “I shouldn’t stare. Especially at my son.”

“Eh, it’s okay. He kinda likes it.”

“He?”

“Mr. Big.”

She rolled her eyes and laughed. “Is that what Christy calls it?”

“Him. He’s a him.”

“Oh, he is, is he? Well, should I shake his hand or something?”

“Probably not,” I deadpanned. “The rules.”

“Oh, right.” Her eyes glinted with laughter. “Those. Obnoxious things, rules. Always getting in the way when you don’t want them to.”

My eyebrows rose with mild disbelief.

She grinned. “Sorry. I’m still teasing you.”

“Yeah. But turnabout’s fair play, you know.”

“Oh, I know. So I’ll stop. For now.” She shot me a grin. “I have a bit of a confession. You aren’t the only one doing a bit of, ahem, creative gardening down below.”

“Oh?”

“You’ll see.” She kicked off her shoes and unbuttoned her jeans. She shimmied and slid them over her hips.

Her jiggling breasts caught my eye, so I didn’t notice her pubic hair at first.

“Your dad asked me to shave,” she said, which drew my attention like a magnet. “Not completely, like Susan does, but ‘just the undercarriage.’”

I couldn’t help but laugh at his choice of words. Then I took a good look at what she was talking about. Her bush was light brown and neatly groomed, as usual, but the triangle narrowed to a point above her slit. Her labia were bare, plump and pinkish-brown.

“Looks nice,” I said, the first thing that came to mind. “Not that… you know. I mean… the rules, right?”

“Right,” she agreed dryly. “The rules.”

“Well, I’d better put sunscreen on my legs,” I said as a distraction.

All of a sudden she laughed.

“What?”

“Better do your penis too. You don’t want it— Excuse me, him sunburned, especially without hair to protect him.” She couldn’t help but grin.

“Yeah, right.”

So I covered my legs and butt with cream. Then I self-consciously coated my dick as well. He reacted predictably.

“I wonder if I should do my lady parts?” Mom wondered. “You know,” she added, “just in case.”

“Better safe than sorry.” I handed over the tube and pretended not to watch as she delicately spread sunscreen on her labia and between her legs. “Might as well do the rest,” she said. “I may tan easier than you do, but I can still burn, especially the first couple of times until I start turning brown.”

She covered her thighs as well, and I did my best not to stare as she bent over to do her lower legs. We’d seen each other nude more times than I could count, but we hadn’t been joking and making sexual innuendos those other times. Not most of them, at least.

“Ready to get back to work?” I said at last.

“Let’s do it.”

I shot her a look, but she hadn’t meant anything by it. I told myself I was imagining things and pulled on my gloves.

The cool morning was a distant memory, replaced by a hot and humid afternoon. I could already feel beads of perspiration forming, so I was glad I’d shed the last of the sweatsuit, which would’ve lived up to its name.

I followed as Mom headed toward the corner of the yard. The flower beds in back were much smaller than the front ones, but they were more crowded with shrubs and trees. We worked around them for more than an hour before we cleared all the weeds and loose brush that had accumulated over the winter.

“I think we’re ready for mulch,” I said at last.

“I think so. We’ll have to be careful, though.”

“Oh? Why?”

“We’ll have shovels and rakes and implements of destruction,” she said, “with all our tender parts exposed.”

“Nude gardening isn’t what it’s cracked up to be?”

“Oh, I didn’t say that. It’s much cooler.”

“It is,” I agreed.

“And the view’s nicer.”

My eyebrows shot up.

“You aren’t the only one who likes to look.”

“Well, look but don’t touch.”

“Says who?” she teased.

“The rules.”

“The ones you said are made to be broken?”

“Yes, those rules. Now, quit teasing me if you aren’t going to do anything about it.”

“I’m sorry,” she said with a grin. “I know I shouldn’t. But… you’re so much fun to tease.”

“Well, I’m also a man who hasn’t had sex—real sex—in months.”

“But Christy takes care of you in other ways, right? I mean— I thought—”

“She does, but it isn’t the same.”

“I know, honey. And I’m sorry. I’ll quit teasing you.”

“Thanks. I’ll survive till I see her, but still… Let’s not tempt fate.”

“Um… no.”

The garage had a side door that opened onto the backyard, so I didn’t have to put on clothes and leave the privacy of the fence to fetch more mulch. I loaded the wheelbarrow and trundled it toward the back fence.

We set to work dumping and spreading bags. It wasn’t difficult, but it took concentration, especially if we wanted to avoid cuts and scrapes from the vegetation. Still, I managed to enjoy the sight of Mom working nude, and I caught her stealing glances at me every once in a while. My dick never grew to its full length, but I was semi-aroused the entire time, which she must have noticed.

“I don’t know about you,” she said as she raked a last bit of mulch around a shrub, “but I’m done. The new plants will keep until tomorrow.”

“Are you sure?” I glanced at my watch. “We still have a couple of hours of daylight.”

She shook her head. “I’m bushed. I want a shower and a cold drink, in that order.”

I wiped sweat from my brow and didn’t care if I left a smudge. “Sounds good to me.”

She started to take off her gloves, but then stopped and looked guilty.

“What?”

“Your shower. It’s still full of houseplants. I can move them and clean the potting soil—”

I waved away the offer. “I’ll shower in your bathroom, if that’s okay.”

“You want to go first?”

“Nah. You go ahead. I’ll have a drink and then a shower.”

“Sounds like a plan.”