Born to Be Wilde

Chapter Sixteen

A new storm raged outside the cabin, loud and windy and with enough furor to rattle the windows in the front rooms. The fire in the hearth had died down enough for Joel to feel confident that it was okay to retire for the night, as Lora had a few hours ago, yet he was still out in the living room, his mind, and his thoughts, working overtime.

He'd spent too much time mulling over what Lora had said about getting Zach the help he needed to overcome his problems, and Joel couldn't agree more with her. He, along with Ben, Kevin, and Jon, were ready and willing to give Zach the financial and emotional support he needed to dig himself out of his predicament, but accepting that help would require a huge dedication from Zach, personally and professionally.

But if Zach couldn't do something as simple as show up for a planned meeting, Joel had to wonder if he had it in him to make the commitment it would take to change his life for the better.

Knowing he needed to get some sleep so they could head back to the city in the morning, Joel got up from the couch and started toward the second empty bedroom down the hall. But instead of passing by the room that Lora was sleeping in, which would have been the smart thing to do, he came to a stop in the doorway and stared at her sleeping form on the bed.

She was curled up on her side, bundled beneath the covers. A flash of lightning from outside illuminated Lora's serene features, followed by a loud crash of thunder that shook the cabin and ultimately startled her awake. She came up on one elbow, her hair tumbling around her shoulders, and looked his way.

"Hey," she said, her voice soft and slightly raspy. "What are you still doing up?"

"I'm on my way to bed right now. I was just checking in on you." He forced himself to back away from the doorway before he gave into the temptation to crawl into bed beside her. "Good night."

"Wait," she called out before he could make his escape. Then she tossed back the covers, scooted over to make room for him, and patted the open spot next to her. "Why don't you sleep here with me? There's no sense in messing up two beds," she teased.

He chuckled, but there wasn't a hint of seduction in her voice. She wasn't looking for sex, and honestly, neither was he. He just wanted to be close to her, to take what he could while it lasted, no matter how selfish that might be.

More thunder clapped over the cabin, accompanied by a torrent of rain pounding on the roof, and Lora winced at the sound. "The storm is making me jumpy, and it sure would be nice not to sleep alone."

She didn't have to convince him any more than that, so accepting her invitation was incredibly easy to do. He moved into the room, and after stripping down to his boxer briefs, he slid into bed beside her. She turned to face the opposite way, and he cuddled up behind her, wrapped an arm around her waist, and aligned the front of his body to her backside.

His head rested next to hers on the pillow, and he breathed in the floral scent lingering in her hair. Interestingly enough, he discovered that she was wearing one of his T-shirts, and not her own pajamas. It appeared that she wanted to be equally close to him, in any way she could.

Smiling, he closed his eyes, and it didn't take him long to fall into a deep, exhausted sleep.

JOEL jolted awake, uncertain as to what, exactly, had disturbed him. Eyes open, he remained still, in the same position that he'd fallen asleep in snuggled up behind Lora, and listened for any unusual sounds. Outside, the storm was still in full force, but it wasn't the distant rumble of thunder or the pattering of rain against the window that had roused him. It had been something else entirely.

Then he heard it again, the rattling of the front doorknob, this time followed by a whoosh of wind as the door opened, then closed behind someone.

The noise woke Lora with a start, and she looked over her shoulder at him. "What was that?" she whispered.

Joel had a feeling that their guest had finally arrived. Considering they were out in the middle of nowhere, and he'd only given one person the directions to the cabin, he'd deliberately left the front door unlocked, in the slim hope that Zach would eventually show up. Even though it was after two in the morning, it appeared that Lora's brother had finally found his way to the place.

Still, Joel wasn't ready to reunite brother and sister just yet, not until he confirmed that what he'd heard truly was Zach. "Just stay put," Joel murmured quietly. "I'm going to check it out."

He rolled out of bed onto his bare feet and stepped out of the bedroom into the adjoining living room just as the person switched on the lamp by the couch, illuminating none other than Zach Marshall. Joel came to a stop, and from across the room Zach stared at him, his chin lifting belligerently, as if anticipating some kind of confrontation or fight.

Joel's first thought was that his friend looked like shit. His dark brown hair was even longer than Joel's had been before his haircut, and the strands were dripping wet and tangled around his head, as if he hadn't bothered to run a comb through his hair in days. His eyes were dull, and what he could see of Zach's unshaven face was pale and gaunt.

Then there was the black and blue bruise ringing his swollen left eye and the fresh cut on his lower lip that added to his unkempt appearance. He was wearing a long, tan trench-like coat that was old, worn, and dirty, and Joel noticed that his left hand and arm were plastered in a cast. He knew without asking that Zach's broken arm and his messed-up face were courtesy of the men who wanted their money from him. And those were just the injuries that he could see. There was no telling what else they'd done to Zach over the past few weeks.

As much as Joel hated seeing Zach in such a sorry state, he wasn't about to pity the other man, or let him off easy. No, Zach had gotten himself into this predicament, and he needed to pull his head out of his ass before he completely flushed his life down the toilet.

"Nice of you to make it," Joel said dryly.

The corner of Zach's lip curled into a bitter smile. "Better late than never, huh, Wilde Man?"

Before Joel could reply to that snide remark, Lora came out of the bedroom behind him, obviously having heard the exchange and recognizing her brother's voice. She came to an abrupt stop next to Joel, her hand fluttering anxiously to her throat.

"Oh my God, Zach?" she asked, her voice trembling with shock, "Is that you?"

Zach's narrowed gaze traveled from Joel, to Lora, then back to Joel again in a heated and furious stare. Too late, Joel realized how the situation looked from Zach's perspective… with his sister walking out of the same bedroom Joel had, and her wearing one of his black T-shirts and her legs bare, while he was in nothing more than his boxer briefs.

The next time Zach looked at Lora, he managed a small smile meant solely for her. "Yeah, it's me." He spread his arms out in front of him. "In the flesh, big sister."

"Oh, Zach," she breathed, obviously still stunned to see him. After a moment, she rushed across the room to give her brother a hug.

Zach returned the embrace, though he still glared at Joel over Lora's shoulder. Joel crossed his arms over his chest and remained where he was, deciding to let brother and sister handle this reunion on their own and without any interference from him.

"It's been forever, and I've been so worried about you, and…" Lora pulled back and glanced from his drenched hair and coat to her own damp T-shirt, and frowned. "You're all wet."

"Yeah, well, there just happens to be a rainstorm out there," he drawled, the beginnings of sarcasm lacing his tone.

"And your face…" She swallowed hard and reached up to touch his discolored cheek.

Zach flinched away before she could make contact. "I'm fine, Lora. Stop fussing over me."

"You're far from fine," she argued, a hint of anger creeping into her voice. "You've got a black eye, a split lip, and your arm is in a cast. And you've been drinking. I can smell the alcohol on your breath."

Zach's lips thinned, and his own temper flared. "If I'd known you were going to reprimand me like a little kid, I never would have shown up."

Now that her initial surprise had ebbed, Joel could see her mind working and trying to make sense of her brother's spontaneous arrival at a cabin miles away from civilization.

She shook her head in confusion and ran her fingers through her sleep-tousled hair, which only added to the appearance that she'd spent the night in Joel's bed having hot sex. "What are you doing here, Zach?"

"What, Joel didn't tell you?" he replied mockingly.

She turned around and tipped her head, looking to Joel for answers, just as Zach had no doubt intended. "Tell me what, Joel?"

Refusing to let Zach make him into the enemy, Joel moved forward into the living room, his gaze on Lora. "Tell you that I set up a meeting for you to see Zach," he said, and went on to explain his reasons for withholding that information before Zach could twist things around to suit his own purposes. "But I didn't say anything to you because I had no idea if Zach would show up, and considering he was supposed to be here, oh, a good sixteen hours ago, I'd given up hope of that happening."

Zach clearly didn't like taking responsibility for his actions and didn't hesitate to deflect the attention off of himself. "Well, it looks like it was more than enough time to nail my sister, now wasn't it, Wilde Man?"

Joel saw that confrontation coming from the moment Lora had walked out of the bedroom behind him, but she obviously hadn't anticipated such a derogatory remark. She gasped in shock and whirled around to face her brother again.

"Zach!" The one word rang with a firm warning for him to back off. "What the hell kind of comment was that?"

"Well, it's the truth, isn't it?" Zach said, and shifted his challenging gaze back to Joel. "I asked you to protect my sister, Joel, not fuck her."

The crude remark spurred Lora into action, and before Zach realized what she intended, she'd hauled off and slapped him across the face, hard enough to make his head snap to the side. "That's enough, Zach!"

Joel couldn't help but silently applaud her bold and gutsy move. She'd just made it more than clear that she wasn't about to take any crap from her brother, and if Zach had any smarts left, he'd watch what he had to say.

Zach worked his jaw and narrowed his gaze at Lora. "Wow, nice greeting, sis."

His obnoxious attitude pissed her off even more, and it seemed like all the pent-up fear and anger toward her brother that she'd been suppressing the past few weeks finally came bubbling to the surface.

"How dare you come here and make Joel the bad guy, or make any kind of assumption about our relationship!" She punctuated her statement with a forceful finger jab to Zach's chest that made him wince. "It's none of your business what's going on between Joel and me. For that matter, I wouldn't be in this situation with Joel if it wasn't for you and your stupid, idiotic idea of using my insurance policy as collateral on a gambling loan. What were you thinking, Zach?"

The first faint signs of remorse flickered in his gaze. "I had no choice."

"That's a pile of bullshit!" she said, not letting sympathy for her brother get the best of her. Instead, she took a tough love approach that Joel admired. "Every time you put money down on a table in hopes of winning you make the wrong choice, Zach. The right choice is to walk away."

Zach's shoulders slumped in defeat, an oddity in a man who'd been trained to be strong and tenacious in any given situation. "You have no idea what it's like," he said quietly.

She exhaled a deep breath and dragged her fingers through her disheveled hair. "Look, you're here, and that's what matters," she said, her voice softening with concern. "Why don't you take a hot shower, and I'll make you something to eat, then we can talk."

Zach nodded. "Yeah, I'd like that."

Joel had been watching their exchange from the sidelines, and now addressed Zach. "Come on, I'll show you where the bathroom is and get you some dry clothes to change into."

He wasn't sure what to expect from Zach, but the other man suddenly appeared exhausted and weary, as if he just didn't have any more fight left in him. Most likely, he didn't. Zach was probably at the end of his rope and barely hanging on for his life, and his sister's.

Zach followed him down the hall to the second bedroom, where Joel first pulled on a pair of black jeans, then retrieved a shirt and a pair of pants for Zach, along with his toiletry bag, which contained shampoo, a razor, and shaving cream if Zach wanted to use any of it. After showing Zach where the bathroom was located, Joel joined Lora in the kitchen.

She was standing at the stove heating up one of the canned soups and buttering slices of bread to make Zach a few grilled cheese sandwiches. A fresh pot of coffee was percolating, and Joel knew they all could use a boost of caffeine considering how early in the morning it was.

As he came up beside her and leaned against the counter, he noticed that she, too, had put on a pair of jeans and traded in his black T-shirt for a sweatshirt. Mostly, he didn't care for how quiet she was and how she wouldn't look at him, and wondered if his decision to keep Zach's possible visit to himself was the reason.

If so, he owed her an apology, and he wasn't above giving it. "I'm sorry, Lora. I should have told you that I set up a meeting here with Zach."

She slanted him a quick glance before placing two slices of buttered bread on the hot skillet. "Yes, you should have, but I do understand why you didn't." She added cheese to the sandwiches and two more slices of bread, and this time when she looked at him, the pain in her gaze was unmistakable. "God, Joel, I've never seen Zach look like this. So dejected and hopelessly lost, and it scares me. What am I going to do?"

"Do you realize that to you it's always about what you can do for Zach, and not what Zach can do for himself? You can't take care of this, Lora. Zach has to do it on his own."

She shook her head, a tinge of desperation etching her features as she stirred the steaming soup. "I have money in my savings that would go a long way toward helping him out of this mess."

"And bail him out like you have every other time in his life?" he asked incredulously. "I'm sure a part of Zach is hoping that you'll offer him the money he needs to help pay off his debt, but I can guarantee that he'll take your money, go and pay off what he owes, and then he'll start gambling all over again." Frustration raised his tone a few decibels. "If you give him the money, he'll continue to think there're no consequences for his behavior. There will be no one forcing him to be accountable for his debt. It would be nothing more than free money for him."

"You're right, but it doesn't make it any easier not to do it," she said quietly, and flipped both of the sandwiches over to grill the other sides.

Her anxiety and despair grabbed at something deep inside him and tugged hard. Realizing he had the power to offer her some kind of comfort from that worry, he decided to let her know what he had planned for Zach. "There's something else I need to tell you."

"What, more secrets?" She turned off the burner beneath the soup and cast him a skeptical glance. "Should I be worried?"

Her comment made him realize just how much he'd withheld from her during the course of their relationship. Keeping things to himself was a part of his personality, a function of how he'd grown up and dealt with more emotional issues that had spilled into his life as a marine, then a security agent. But now it made him more aware that she was the one person who managed to drag these things out of him, that he trusted her with so much of himself, and that was a scary prospect for him.

He mentally filed that away to think about later. Right now, they had her brother's problem to deal with.

"No, there's nothing for you to worry about," he reassured her. "Not only did I ask Zach to meet us here for the two of you to see one another, but I also have a proposition for him that would enable him to pay off this debt and give him a chance at a solid future."

Her eyes grew wide, and though she didn't ask for specific details, the gratitude passing across her features spoke volumes. "You would do that for Zach?"

Without thinking, he reached out and caressed his thumb along her soft cheek, that simple touch affecting him more deeply than it should have. "And for you."

Moisture welled up in her eyes, and she swallowed hard. "Thank you," she whispered.

The urge to take her into his arms and comfort her was strong, but with Zach in the cabin and already tossing around derogatory remarks about the two of them, the last thing Joel wanted was to have her brother walk in on them in an embrace, no matter how innocent.

So, instead, he turned around and opened one of the overhead cupboards. "Would you like some coffee?"

She nodded and returned her attention to preparing Zach's meal. "Yes, please."

He retrieved three mugs and poured coffee into each one while Lora put the grilled cheese sandwiches on a plate and poured the soup into a bowl. By the time everything was on the table, Zach was done with his shower and joined them in the kitchen, looking much more human than he had when he'd arrived.

Zach had shaved the grisly stubble on his face, and he'd combed his now-clean hair away from his face. His eyes were still a bit bloodshot-from lack of sleep or too much alcohol, Joel wasn't certain-but overall his tidied-up appearance and change of clothes was a huge improvement.

They all took a seat at the table, and Zach immediately started in on his soup and sandwiches like a starved man, which he most likely was. Joel decided to wait and give the man some time to eat his meal before talking to Zach about his proposal.

Lora took a sip of her coffee, sweetened with cream and sugar, and was the first to speak. "Zach, what happened to your face? Those look like fresh cuts and bruises."

"They are," he admitted, already finished with one of the sandwiches. "This is what you get when you make a payment on an outstanding debt, so you can imagine what happens when you don't." He gave his sister a lopsided grin, obviously meant to make light of the situation.

Lora wasn't at all charmed by the smile. "You made a payment? How did you manage that?" She frowned at him in confusion, then realization struck before Zach could reply. "Don't tell me you're still gambling!"

Zach's demeanor immediately changed, his entire body stiffening defensively, which was an answer in itself.

Lora stared at her brother in shock, unable to believe the depths he'd sunk to, yet he was digging himself deeper and deeper into debt. "You have no money to gamble, Zach," she said, stating the obvious. "Or should I ask, whose life are you playing with now?" It was a low blow, she knew, but she wasn't about to sugarcoat the situation.

Animosity tightened the clench of Zach's jaw. "Look, I borrowed some money from a friend, okay?"

"A friend?" Her doubt rang clear in her voice. "How much interest does this friend charge?" she went on persistently. "No matter who it is, you're borrowing from Peter to pay Paul, not to mention that my life has been at a standstill since you handed over my insurance policy as collateral. What happens when you don't win a poker hand, Zach? When you lose all the money you just borrowed from someone else?"

Zach dropped his spoon into his empty bowl with a loud clatter, a muscle in his cheek twitching with suppressed fury. "I'm doing what I can to get myself out of this fucking mess."

"What you're doing is digging yourself deeper into debt, not to mention doing desperate things in order to keep yourself, and now me, alive," she replied heatedly. "Your life is spiraling out of control and it has to stop."

The hand Zach had on the table curled into a tight fist. "I'm handling it, okay?"

Lora glanced at Joel, who sat quietly across the table from her, watching the bitter argument between her and Zach. Up to this point she'd dominated the conversation, and judging by the understanding look in Joel's eyes, he knew that she'd needed to vent and had given her that opportunity. But now, she needed him to intervene with that proposition for Zach that he'd mentioned earlier.

Joel cleared his throat and sat forward in his seat, and Zach automatically looked his way. "I have an offer for you," Joel said calmly. "One that would pay off your debt, get those thugs off your back, and eliminate the threat hanging over your sister's head, too."

Zach's gaze narrowed with suspicion, but was quickly eclipsed by a curiosity that got the best of him. "Go ahead," he said gruffly. "I'm listening."

"I talked with Jon, Ben, and Kevin, and we're willing to pay off your outstanding debt with this Lanny Mendoza guy, and anyone else you owe, in order for you to start off with a fresh, clean slate." Joel paused for a second to let that sink in before adding, "But, the new loan from us and our company, ESS, comes with a few stipulations."

"Of course it does." Zach replied drolly, and crossed his arms over his chest. "Let's hear it."

"In exchange for us paying off your debt and getting your sister's life insurance policy off the block for collateral, you need to agree to rehab for your gambling and alcohol addictions. Once you've completed that program, the guys and I want to offer you a job at ESS, which will pay you enough to make a decent living as well as pay back what you owe us."

Lora's mind reeled at Joel's generous proposal, and she had to resist the urge to jump up and shout "yes!" to the offer for Zach. But, it wasn't hers to accept, and she glanced anxiously at her brother. While Lora was thrilled and knew what a golden opportunity this was for Zach to start a new life for himself, as well as get the help he desperately needed, her brother clearly didn't share her enthusiasm.

In fact, Zach looked downright furious. "What the hell is this, some kind of fucking setup?" he demanded, staring hard at Joel. "I come here to see my sister, and you accuse me of having a gambling and drinking problem and want to lock me up in some kind of psychiatric facility? Nice way to show your gratitude for me saving your life, Wilde Man."

Joel didn't so much as flinch. "This is my way of showing gratitude, you ass. Quid pro quo. You saved my life, I'm trying to save yours, and you damn well know it, so don't start looking for someone else to blame for your problems."

"Well, I don't have any problems to fix," Zach sneered. "This one thing got a little out of control, and you both are making a bigger deal out of it than it needs to be."

"Oh, really?" Joel leaned closer to Zach, his expression as ruthless and cutthroat as a man could get. "Look at your sister and tell her that, so when those thugs come looking for her again, she'll remember that you don't have a gambling addiction, and those men are going to kill her for no reason at all. How do you feel about that?"

Joel's deliberately brutal words had the desired affect on Zach, hitting him where he was most susceptible. Rage flared across her brother's features, and he stood up so fast his chair hit the back wall behind him. "Fuck you, Joel!"

"The truth hurts, doesn't it, Zach?" Joel's mouth flattened into a grim line.

"You don't know the first thing about my situation," Zach said through clenched teeth.

"I know enough, Zach." In a smooth, fluid motion, Joel stood, too, looking far stronger and more intimidating than Zach. "I know you're so far gone, and so desperate, that you really have no concept of what you're doing to your life, and your sister's. And if you go back to gambling and start losing and can't pay back your debt, those guys aren't going to kill you, Zach, because that doesn't do them any good at all. Instead, they're going to torture you, little by little, until you're barely hanging on and in so much pain you beg them to let you die, but they're not going to put you out of your misery. Then, they'll go and find your sister and kill her so you can collect on her insurance policy and pay them what you owe. And maybe, if you're really lucky, they'll finally leave you alone."

The picture that Joel painted with his harsh words was utterly morbid, and it chilled Lora to the bone. She understood what Joel was doing, that he was attempting to break Zach down and force him to face his demons. And, ultimately, to get him to admit that he did, indeed, have a problem and had dug himself into a hole so deep, there were only two ways out… Lanny Mendoza's way, or Joel's way.

"This is fucking bullshit!" Despite Zach's brave tirade, he was trembling, and panic flashed in his eyes, along with a stark fear he couldn't conceal no matter how hard he tried.

Her brother's denial was so painful to watch that Lora felt her chest tighten to the point that it became difficult to breathe. She wanted to yell at him for being so stubborn and stupid and too proud to accept help, but Joel had everything under control and didn't need her falling apart on him, too.

"What it is, is your reality," Joel told Zach. "I'm offering you a clear-cut way out. You've already lost everything. You have absolutely nothing to lose by accepting my proposition, and so much to gain."

"Forget it." Zach backed away from the table, scrambling to put distance between himself and Joel and the truth threatening to strangle him. "I'm out of here." He spun around and strode out of the kitchen to the front room.

"Oh, God," Lora said on a sob, and started after her brother, ready to do or say whatever it took to make him see reason. She was terrified that if he walked out that door she'd never, ever see him again.

Joel caught her arm before she could chase after him. "Let him go, Lora," he said gently. "He has to want to change, or else we'll all be wasting our time."

The front door slammed shut behind Zach, and Lora felt her heart pound just as hard. Tears stung the backs of her eyes and her throat grew raw. "What is it going to take to make him want to change?"

Joel didn't bother to disguise his own pain over the situation. "Hitting rock bottom."

A harsh, humorless laugh escaped her, and she cringed as she heard Zach's vehicle skid on the gravel drive as he left. "I thought he already had."

"Not quite." Joel pulled her into his arms, and she went willingly, needing his comfort and strength to get her through this agonizing experience. "I just hope he comes to his senses before it's too late."

So did Lora, because she knew that despite her brother's obstinance, she'd never be able to live with herself if anything bad happened to Zach.

AFTER Zach's abrupt departure, sleep was impossible. Lora tossed and turned in her bed and listened to the rain outside until six in the morning. She could hear Joel moving around in the living room, and she decided that there was nothing left for them to do at the cabin. It was time to get up and get dressed, pack their small bags, and head back to the city.

Within an hour, they were ready to go.

While Joel did one last check of the cabin and made sure that the fire in the hearth was completely extinguished, Lora stepped outside and came to an immediate stop when she saw a large figure huddled on the front porch. Instantly, she recognized the straggly, damp brown hair and dirty and stained coat covering the slumped form as Zach's.

"Oh, no," she breathed, her mind already thinking the absolute worst. She fell to her knees beside her brother and shook him, hard, and experienced a flood of relief when he lifted his head and opened his bloodshot eyes. "Zach, are you okay?"

"Yeah… just dandy." He tried to smile, but his expression was heartbreakingly bleak and desolate. He shifted on the cold wooden planks, and an empty pint of vodka rolled out from beneath his coat. He glanced from the bottle to Lora and murmured, "There's absolutely nothing left."

It was a bizarre statement, and she couldn't help but think that he was referring to more than just the empty bottle of booze that he'd undoubtedly consumed. She wondered if this is what Joel had meant when he'd said that Zach had to hit rock bottom, because her brother certainly appeared lost and bereft and she couldn't imagine him falling any further into his own personal hell.

Joel came out of the cabin and the screen door slammed shut behind him, the sound making Lora jump.

She glanced behind her, unsure what to do. "He came back," she said, praying that was a positive sign and a step toward Zach aiding in his own recovery.

Joel crouched down beside her so he could be on eye level with her brother. "What's going on, buddy?"

Zach met his gaze without the cocky, brash attitude he'd displayed toward Joel only hours before. "Is your offer still on the table?"

"That all depends on what changed your mind," Joel replied mildly.

Zach dragged both his hands down his face and released a rough exhale of breath, and it was clear to Lora that this wasn't easy for her brother. "I got as far as the main road when my car ran out of gas and I realized I didn't even have enough money to fill even a quarter of the tank." He shook his head pathetically. "So, I walked back here in the rain while drinking my last bottle of booze, and now I have nothing left. No money. No place to live. No job. And pretty soon, no life."

Emotion clogged Lora's throat, and she swallowed back the pressure so she could reassure her brother of the one thing that mattered the most. "You have us, Zach."

He looked at her, the pain and hopelessness in his gaze more honest and real than anything he'd shown them so far. "I can't do this anymore, Lora," he said in a choked voice. "I'm just so damn tired of running and looking over my shoulder and not knowing if every day is going to be my last. I want out, and I want my life back," he whispered.

"Well, we can definitely help you with that," Joel said, and straightened to his full height once again. "It's not going to be a quick, easy process, but I do need a verbal commitment from you that you're willing to do whatever it takes to get the help you need for your addictions, and your life is yours again."

Zach nodded in understanding. "I'll do it." He pushed to his feet and stood.

"Good," Joel said, pleased with Zach's acquiescence. "Let's get you back inside the cabin. There's enough food here for at least another week, and I'm going to call and see which one of the guys can stay out here with you until we settle your debt and make sure your life, and Lora's, are no longer in danger."

At the mention of her name, Zach glanced at her. "I know I royally screwed things up, and I'm sorry, Lora," he said gruffly, putting aside his own pride to extend the apology she deserved. "I swear, I'll make this up to you."

She offered him a tremulous smile. "As of right now, you are." As grateful as Lora was for Zach's turnaround, she knew her brother had a long road ahead of him, most of which would be an uphill struggle before things smoothed out for him.

Zach turned back to Joel. "Thank you." He extended his hand to the other man. "Semper fi, Wilde Man."

The beginnings of a smile curved the corner of Joel's mouth. "Semper fi, Marshall," he replied, then shook the hand Zach offered, in friendship, camaraderie, and the kind of brotherhood that could have only been formed by their time in the military together.

Semper fi. Always faithful.

Lora could see and feel the integrity between the two men, and it made her believe that everything, in time, might just be okay for her brother.

Chapter Seventeen

DANIEL parked his Volvo in front of The Electric Blue and cut the engine. Other than Sydney's car, the lot was completely empty, which was strange to see since he'd only been there in the evenings, when the area was crammed with vehicles and there was usually a long line of customers waiting outside in hopes of getting into the bar for a guaranteed good time. Having his own intimate connections with the bar owner, he was always lucky enough to bypass that queue of people no matter when he arrived.

But his visit this afternoon had more to do with business than the kind of pleasure The Electric Blue had to offer. After watching Cassie over the past two weeks, throughout normal class time and again during after school tutoring, he'd finally figured out what was going on with the teen and the reason she was exhibiting inconsistent grades in her homework and math tests.

As soon as his students left his classroom after tutoring that afternoon, he'd called Sydney and told her that they needed to talk. Since she was trying to finish up payroll and inventory before her crew showed up in a few hours, he'd offered to stop by The Electric Blue on his way home.

He exited his car, hit the lock and alarm switch, and headed toward the establishment's front doors. Judging by Sydney's reaction over the phone, he knew she was anxious to discover why her daughter was having a difficult time in his class when Cassie had never had an issue with math before. Daniel had found the whole cause behind Cassie's apparent struggle in math amusing and typical of a teenager, but he'd learned enough about Sydney, and how overly protective she was of her daughter, to know that she was not going to take the news of Cassie's deception well at all.

He knocked hard on the establishment's main door, and less than a minute later Sydney was there, letting him inside, looking gorgeous and sexy, as always. Soft auburn curls spilled over her shoulders in a sultry disarray, and she was wearing a long-sleeved, low-cut cotton top that hugged her voluptuous curves, as did her skinny jeans. After a quick hello, she led him back to her office, where they could sit down and talk. She sat down behind her desk, and he took one of the chairs in front of her.

"So, what's up with Cass?" she asked, getting right to the point.

As Sydney stared at him impatiently, Daniel had the distinct and unsettling feeling that today's conversation was going to be a turning point for them, and not in a good way. That all the emotional headway he'd made with her over the past few weeks, all the dates and getting-to-know-you conversations they'd had, and the hot foreplay that he never let turn into the actual sex she wanted from him, was going to go up in smoke right before his very eyes.

He could tell by her rigid posture and the guarded look in her gaze that she'd already erected those frustrating barriers between them. The ones that told him she was falling back into that self-preservation mode of hers that shut down her emotions and kept him at a distance. It was such a natural, ingrained response from her that he was pretty sure she didn't even realize she'd done it. But he read those signals loud and clear, and it didn't bode well for him at all.

"Earth to Daniel," she said, waving a hand in front of him to get his attention. "Are you still with me?"

"Sorry." He shook his head to wipe those other thoughts from his mind, and redirected his focus on the reason he was there. "You know I've been working with Cass over the past few weeks, and watching her during tutoring, and I'm pretty sure I've discovered what's up with her inconsistent homework and test scores."

She folded her hands on top of her desk, her fingers clasped tight. "Is everything okay?"

"Well, that depends on your definition of 'okay,' " he said lightly. Knowing they were about to tread upon a very serious topic, he choose his words, and explanation, carefully. "The good news is, Cassie is completely capable of doing the math homework I give out, and her test scores have improved."

"Thank God," she said, breathing a sigh of relief that also released the beginnings of a smile. "I've been trying to stay on top of her at home on a nightly basis, and I'm sure the after school tutoring is helping, too."

"Tutoring does have something to do with her improvement, but not in the way you think. The thing is, Cassie never needed the help in the first place."

Sydney's smile immediately faded, and confusion creased her auburn brows. "I'm not quite sure I'm following you on this."

Standing, he came around to where she was sitting, and propped himself on an edge of the desk that wasn't piled with paperwork. "Remember when I told you that I encourage students to pair up during after school tutoring sessions to help one another while I'm working one on one with someone?"

She leaned back in her chair and nodded. "Yes."

"Well, I noticed that when I made the suggestion that the students choose a partner, Cassie was quick to pick hers." There was no easy way to tell Sydney what he knew, no way to sugarcoat the truth that would send this protective mother over the edge. So, he attempted to keep his tone and demeanor casual, in hopes that it would keep Sydney calm, too. "She chose a boy named Ryan, who I noticed also tends to flirt with her during regular class time."

Sydney's complexion paled, and her eyes grew wide with something akin to fear. "Oh, God, are you saying that Cassie deliberately dropped her test scores and grades to get into after-school tutoring in hopes of being with this boy?"

He slid his hands into the front pockets of his khaki trousers. "That's definitely how it looks, though I didn't want to call Cassie on her behavior until after I talked to you."

"Well you can be damn sure I'll set her straight as soon as I get home!" she said adamantly, then ran a shaking hand through her hair. "What the hell is she thinking, playing dumb and risking her grades for some boy?"

Daniel could tell that Sydney was on the verge of hysterics, and decided to share with her the positive aspects of the situation. "What's funny is that Cassie did most of the helping when she was paired up with Ryan, because she knew the problems, and as a result they both ended up with an A on a test I gave the class." He grinned.

"Hell, if she can tutor the boy and get his grades to improve, too, what's wrong with that?"

Her gaze narrowed at him. "What's wrong is that she has no business getting involved with this boy!"

"He's a nice, decent kid, Sydney," he said, trying to soften the situation and reassure her that Cassie hadn't gone after some hoodlum. "He's even a little shy. I've met his parents, and they're good people, too. The kind that care about their son and his education. Just like you do with Cassie."

"I don't give a shit if he's the Prince of England!" She abruptly stood up, her tone angry, "Jesus, was he the reason why she wanted to go to that Halloween party so badly?"

"I'm sure he was there," he said automatically, then wished he'd kept his mouth shut when Sydney grew even more furious.

She paced to the other side of the office, and he felt the distance she put between them like a cold chill. "God, now she's lying to me and sneaking around, too. What's next?" Her voice broke with anguish.

He sighed, trying to keep his own frustration in check. "I'm sure it's not as bad as it seems."

She spun back around and glared at him. "You did not just say that."

He truly didn't understand her extreme reaction to the situation, "It's normal teenage behavior, and I see it all the time at school. She's a fifteen-year-old girl who has a crush on a boy and wants to get his attention. In her mind, playing down her math skills so she could get into after school tutoring was her subtle way of doing it." He moved off the desk and stood, facing her. "Trust me, kids do stupid things sometimes, and while I agree that Cassie never should have jeopardized her grades, I've seen kids do much, much worse." Cassie's actions were mild in comparison to the kind of the peer pressure some girls caved into in order to impress boys.

Sydney's chin jutted out, and she crossed her arms over her chest defensively. "Yeah, well, I know what that 'much worse' is, and there is no way I'm going to let Cassie make the same mistakes that I did."

He had the feeling that they'd just crossed over into uncharted territory for him-that for as much as he knew about Sydney and her past, there was a whole lot more he didn't know that tied into her need to insulate her daughter from the real world. "What are you talking about, Syd?"

"I know exactly what teenage boys want from girls who show them the least bit of interest," she stated adamantly. "I already told you about my past, about my mother's heroin addiction and overdose and how I was sent to a foster home. Well, what I didn't tell you was that it was my own foster brother who took my virginity and got me pregnant with Cassie."

What came to mind was the worst kind of scenario he could imagine. "He raped you?"

She shook her head, causing her curls to tumble wildly around her face. "Oh, no, he didn't have to force me." Her tone was infused with bitterness and regrets. "I was fourteen years old, I already had the body of a centerfold, just like my own daughter does, and Tim Carson was two years older than I was. He said all the right things and led me to believe that he loved me, and because I was so young and naive and wanted more than anything to be loved, I gave in and had sex with him. Three months later I'm pregnant and Tim's denying that he's the father, and his parents chose to believe him. In fact, they accused me of trying to trap their son by claiming the child was his, then promptly called the state to come and pick me up."

The pain etched on Sydney's expression made Daniel's heart break. He'd known she'd had a rough past, but he had no idea just how bad it had been. Now he understood that tough attitude of hers, but he also knew it masked a more vulnerable, insecure side to Sydney, as well. Like the woman who craved love and acceptance, but had never received it. A woman who'd opted to be brash and bold in order to protect her emotions.

And most especially, a woman who based a relationship purely on sex, because she didn't believe herself worthy of love.

"After that, Tim told his buddies at school that I was nothing more than a whore who put out, which had most of the guys making lewd remarks and crude advances toward me, because being a slut and all, they were sure I'd have sex with them, too," she went on, and paced the small area across from where he stood. "They were pigs, all of them, and especially Tim, and I swore I'd never, ever, let any boy take advantage of my daughter that way."

"Not all guys are that way, Sydney," he said gently. He wasn't like that, but despite his numerous attempts to prove that to her, she didn't want to believe that, either.

She released a scoffing laugh. "Tim might have been the first one to take one look at my big breasts and curvy body and decide that he wanted to screw me, but it's been that way ever since. Guys only want one thing from me, and I've learned to deal with that in my own way, but my daughter is not going to be in that situation if I can help it!"

He moved across the small office, until he was close enough to feel the agitation radiating off of her. "So, what, you're going to put Cassie in a chastity belt until she's of age?"

She glared at him. "That is so not funny."

"You're right, and I'm sorry." He released a sigh of breath and gave it another shot. "I guess I see all this from a different perspective, along with my experience of being around hormonal sex-crazed teenagers all day long. The thing is, sooner or later, sex happens, Sydney. But to your credit, you've raised a really smart girl with a good head on her shoulders."

Sydney wasn't the least bit swayed by his point of view of the situation. "Yeah, well, that's not going to keep some boy from getting into her pants, now is it?"

"No, but neither is forbidding her from seeing or dating some boy, which will only force her to sneak behind your back to do it," he argued. "You just have to trust that when she's put into that kind of sexual situation, she's going to make the right decision and be smart about it." Reaching out, he caressed his fingers along her smooth cheek and softened his tone as he continued. "Besides, Cassie has one thing going in her favor that you didn't at her age. She has a loving and caring mother. There's no reason for her to go looking for those things, or to be swayed by a boy's declaration of love. Not if she doesn't want to be."

She jerked away from his touch, a hint of desperation shining through the fierce façade she was attempting to cling to. "You just don't get it, Daniel."

Ahhh, the evasive "you just don't get it" dictum, which, in Sydney's case, meant just the opposite. He was getting too close and too personal, and while she was doing her best to erect emotional walls between them, he was more than prepared to tear them all down. One by one, if need be.

"I get it more than you realize," he said, taking a more direct approach. "In fact, I get that this is more about you than it is about Cassie."

An impatient sound escaped her. "What the hell are you talking about?"

He shrugged. "It's about you and your past and how you've lived your life."

"How I've lived my life?" she repeated, brows raised incredulously. "Please, do tell me what you think you know."

If she wanted to play that kind of hardball, then he was game, and he didn't hesitate to step up to the plate. "I think that as a result of what happened with Tim and those other boys who thought you were easy, you decided to use sex to your own advantage, and as a way to keep any guy from getting too close. Sex is pleasurable and easy, and if you keep it all about the physical, it keeps you in control and there's no threat to your emotions. How am I doing so far, sweetheart?"

"Not very well," she lied. "You're way off base."

"Really?" he drawled lazily. "Then what have you been doing with me for the past few weeks? You've been trying to use sex to scratch whatever itch you think you might have, and you've been annoyed as hell that I haven't given in to your numerous attempts at seduction and screwed you, like every other guy that's come before me. That would have been ideal for you, wouldn't it have been?"

She jabbed him in the chest with a finger. "You are so full of shit."

He laughed, but the sound lacked any true humor. "Personally, I think I'm hitting way too close to the truth, and you don't like what you're hearing."

"Go to hell, Daniel." Her nostrils flared, as did her temper. "In fact, while we're at it, why don't we just put an end to this thing between us, right here and now."

That didn't surprise Daniel one bit. It was an easy way out, and she was taking it. "Just in case you didn't know, because you haven't had all that much experience with them, it's called a relationship, Syd."

She waved a hand between them and adopted an I-don't-give-a-damn attitude. "Yeah, whatever you want to call it, it's not going anywhere."

Oh, but it was, or else she wouldn't be scrambling to end things. "It's just not going where you want it to go. Isn't that what you mean?"

She glanced away and rubbed at her forehead with her fingers. He knew he was putting her through an emotional wringer, but it was necessary if they were going to have any chance at a future together, and he wanted that with her more than anything.

Finally, she looked back at him, her fortitude back in place. "The truth of the matter is that a relationship between us would never work. We're just too different, Daniel."

No way was he letting her off with such a simple, unexplained statement. "How so?" he persisted.

She clearly wasn't happy that he was pushing the issue, but to her credit she didn't brash off his question. "Look at you, and look at me. Compare your childhood to the one I just told you about. Compare my heroin addict mother and my father who was a nameless John, to your wealthy family who no doubt cares about those things," she said critically. "Your parents would take one look at me, and once they found out I had a daughter at the age of fourteen out of wedlock, and that I own a bar where I dance on the countertops to entertain the customers and help sell more alcohol, they'd probably disown you for being involved with someone like me."

Disowning him would be a bit extreme, but unfortunately, he knew his parents had a tendency to judge people. "I don't give a shit what my parents think of you."

"Well, you should," she said, her gaze bright with conviction. "They no doubt expect someone better for you. Someone who is sweet and refined and loves going to Sunday brunch with the family and would be satisfied to be a stay at home mother and wife."

All the things she believed she wasn't. "My parents do expect a lot from me, but I've never bended to their expectations and I don't intend to now," he stated firmly. "If that were the case, I'd be a doctor, not a math teacher, and I would have married the sweet, refined debutante my mother set me up with when I was twenty. This is my life, not theirs, and I don't need their permission to date you, or anyone else."

She suddenly looked tired and weary, but she didn't back down from her own personal fight. "Let me set you straight, Daniel. I'm the kind of woman that men fuck, not the kind that they take home to meet their family or marry."

He met and held her dark gaze. "I disagree."

"Well, then it's time for you to pull your head out of the clouds and face the reality of who and what I am." Her expression hardened, grew cool and defiant and relentless in her quest to make him understand. "I was a stripper in a gentlemen's club for years, because the tips were outstanding and it helped me to survive and take care of Cassie. Men paid me damn good money for the illusion of sex, no big surprise there," she added wryly. "But do you know how I got the business loan to open up my own bar? The guy at the bank struck a deal with me. Sex in exchange for him pushing my loan application through. So, I slept with him to get what I wanted. Not exactly what a good girl would do, now is it?"

Knowing that she was baiting him, he didn't bother to answer the theoretical question.

"And like every other guy who's come before you, that's all this thing between us is about. Sex. Except you won't give me what I want."

A slight, mocking smile curved the corner of his mouth. "Yeah, imagine that."

Her annoyance spilled over into a deeper, darker resentment. "There's only one thing I want from you, Daniel, so don't make this affair into something more than it is. In fact, since you won't give me what I want, get the hell out of my bar and don't come back." She turned away and started back toward her desk.

Oh, she'd like that, and her pretense of indifference pissed him off more than anything else, because he knew that she felt something for him. That it was more than just a physical thing between them, and now she was quick to end their affair before those emotions had a chance to take root and grow. Well, he wasn't about to let her walk away without giving her something to think about.

He grabbed her arm before she passed him, and in the next moment he had her pressed up against the wall, his body pinning hers in place. Her lips parted to say something, most likely to tell him off with that smart mouth of hers, but he didn't give her the chance. He slanted his lips over hers and took full and complete possession of her mouth. His tongue sank deep, tasting, taking, ravaging-and being the bold and reckless woman that she was, Sydney kissed him back just as aggressively, and with an unmistakable edge of anger.

As their mouths and tongues dueled for supremacy, she pushed her hands between their bodies and skimmed her fingers down to the waistband of his pants. She started unbuckling his belt, and he grasped her wrists, pulled her hands away, and secured them at the sides of her head, refusing to let her take control of this situation, or make it all about sex.

No, this was about them connecting on a deeper, more intimate level. This was about breaking down barriers and getting Sydney to open up and trust him with her heart and emotions.

A moan of frustration rose up in her throat, and he changed the tenor of the kiss. Easing up on the hard pressure of his mouth against hers, he kissed her slow and gentle, and used his lips to coax and seduce. Gradually, he felt the change in her, too. Her tense body relaxed and flowed against his, and the hands he'd pinned against the wall grew slack, as well. Her mouth softened beneath his, and he swirled his tongue around hers, tasting that soul-deep vulnerability of hers, along with the fear of letting someone close enough to hurt her.

By the time he lifted his head and stared into her glassy eyes, they were both breathing hard. But he still had a point to drive home, and this time he did it with harsh and direct words. "Giving you what you want-fucking you-would be so easy to do, Sydney," he said, his voice low and rough. "But I want to give you what you need."

Her bottom lip trembled ever so slightly, "You have no idea what I need," she whispered raggedly, still intent on denying any shred of feeling she had for him.

"That's where you're wrong. I do know what you need, because I need the same thing." Releasing her, he stepped back, and wasn't quite sure what to make of the flash of panic he saw in her eyes. But that was part of their problem… her inability to share those fears and insecurities with him.

But he had no qualms about putting himself out there for her, his heart and soul, wholly and completely. "It's okay to let someone love you, Sydney," he said gently, and felt his chest tighten when a telling moisture filled her eyes. "It's okay to let me love you, because I'm not going to hurt you, or disappoint you the way so many people in your past have. But I want more than a temporary sexual fix or a hot affair, and you deserve more than that, too."

She lifted her chin a fraction and said nothing. The woman was so damn stubborn, and deeply wounded, and she wasn't nearly as tough as she wanted everyone to believe.

"I'm going to go, just like you asked me to," he said, leaving any chance at a future together solely up to her. He managed a small smile. "If someday you decide you want to give the whole relationship thing a try, you know where to find me."

On impulse, he stepped back toward her and brushed his lips along her cheek in a soft kiss, and took a few selfish seconds to breathe in her scent so he could memorize it for later. When he pulled back, he had to steel himself against the devastated look on her face, and it took every ounce of strength he possessed to turn around and walk out of her life.

Chapter Eighteen

"YOU'RE awfully quiet. Are you okay?"

Lora turned her gaze from the passenger window of Joel's SUV to the man sitting in the driver's seat as he navigated the way to his sister's gallery opening in downtown Chicago. Between watching the road and glancing at her, she caught glimpses of concern in his gaze and summoned a reassuring smile.

"Yeah, I'm good." As good as to be expected, she supposed, considering it was only a matter of time before the two of them went their separate ways.

It had been three days since they'd left Zach behind at the cabin with Kevin, and Joel's guys had begun the process of tracking down Lanny Mendoza to pay off her brother's debt. Once that was done, and her safety was no longer an issue, there was no reason for Joel to be by her side twenty-four/seven. He'd already made mention of a security case that was previously lined up for him, and he seemed anxious to get back to real work.

She knew the end was inevitable, yet there was that deep-seated hope she couldn't help but harbor that Joel would come around and give the two of them a chance. But he'd made his stand on relationships more than clear, and she was forced to accept that their affair had been as temporary as his presence in her life.

"Try not to feel too overwhelmed by my family, okay?" Joel's tone was light, as was the easygoing grin he cast her way. "According to Mia, just about everyone is going to be at the opening, so I'm sure you'll be whisked around for a dozen or more introductions. There's my brothers and their wives, and my cousins and their spouses, too."

"Actually, I'm looking forward to meeting everyone." And, she was interested in watching his family dynamics in action.

"The only ones you won't get to meet are the parents, and the little ones." He put on his blinker and made a right-hand turn down a side street. "Mia felt too uneasy about having toddlers in the gallery with all the glass designs, so the grandparents offered to stay at home and watch the rugrats."

She rested her head against the back of the seat and smiled at him. "That was nice of them."

"Are you kidding? They're loving having grandkids and want to be around them any chance they get." He pulled into a parking lot, which was already half filled, and found a spot near the entrance of the gallery. "Before long we're going to have an entire soccer team at family gatherings," he said, genuine affection in his tone.

She laughed, easily imagining Joel as an uncle, with little ones clamoring for his attention. Despite his rough and tough exterior, the man had a huge, caring heart. She'd seen it numerous times over the past few weeks, and it was just one of the many wonderful qualities he possessed that she'd fallen in love with.

Yeah, she was in love with Joel Wilde. Deeply. Irrevocably. In ways that defied anything she'd ever felt before, and she instinctively knew her heart would never be the same again.

Refusing to dwell on those thoughts tonight, she got out of the car with Joel and they headed toward the front of Wilde Designs. Joel's hand lightly touched that sensitive spot at the base of her spine that he'd kissed just days ago while doing other more erotic things to her body, and she shivered at the delicious memory.

"Are you cold?" he asked.

"Ummm, no." It was the first week in November, and there was a definite autumn nip in the air, but she'd worn a sweater top with a calf-length skirt and stylish boots, so she was plenty warm. It was other, more intimate things giving her the chills. "I'm okay."

He continued to escort her toward the gallery, the front of which was all framed in plate glass, enabling people who were window shopping to see directly into the shop and admire all the gorgeous stained glass designs glimmering beneath bright, strategically placed lights. Joel held the door open for her, and they stepped inside the shop, where a small crowd was already milling about and viewing all the dazzling works of art on display and for sale. The showroom buzzed with light chatter and bursts of delighted laughter, and an exuberant energy added to the lively atmosphere.

Since Joel didn't see any of his family right away, the two of them casually strolled from one partitioned room to the next to view the amazing artwork. There were butterflies and flowers and various animals all reproduced in colorful shards of glass, along with other abstract patterns, but Lora found herself drawn to one of the stained glass designs in particular-a stunning picture of a beautiful blond-haired fairy with iridescent wings who was sitting in a meadow of exotic flowers. The name of the piece was "Midsummer Dream," and it was absolutely breathtaking.

Because Joel had explained to her that his sister's designs had a sensual twist to them, it didn't take her long to see the entwined couple meshed within the riot of wild-flowers.

"They're right here, aren't they?" she said in awe, and pointed to the subtle shades of glass that formed the couple's erotic embrace.

"Yes, they are," a female voice said from behind them, before Joel could reply.

Both she and Joel turned around at the same time. Lora smiled at the beautiful woman, with her thick, shoulder-length black hair, smoky silver eyes, and striking features. She was wearing a silk sapphire blue dress that was both elegant and sexy, and her face glowed with happiness.

The woman glanced from Lora to Joel, and she gave him a wide-eyed once-over. "Joel?" She asked incredulously. "Is that really you?"

He rolled his eyes at her dubious tone. "Cut the crap, Mia," he drawled good-naturedly, and pulled her into a heartfelt hug, which she returned just as warmly.

Mia was laughing when she pulled back. "You clean up real nice, Joel," she said, more sincere this time. "You were way overdue for a haircut, and it's always nice to see you in something other than black," she teased.

"You wound me." Joel spread his arms wide, showing off his black silk dress shirt, black slacks, and equally black loafers. "And here I dressed up just for you so I'd look presentable tonight."

"And you do," she insisted. "You look very handsome."

Lora had to agree. She'd only seen Joel in denim and cotton shirts, and now, with his new haircut, fashionable clothing, and smoldering masculine features, he looked as though he could have stepped right off the pages of a GQ Magazine.

Mia turned her attention to Lora, her gaze bright with interest and speculation, before looking back at Joel. "And this must be Lora, the woman you told me about on the phone, right? The one that's a client of ESS?"

"Yes," he confirmed, obviously going with the client perception. "Lora, this is my pain-in-the-ass sister, Mia."

"Nice introduction," Mia said, and wrinkled her nose at her brother before grinning at Lora and extending her hand. "It's very nice to meet you."

Mia's handshake was friendly and welcoming. "Yes, it's a real pleasure," Lora said. "Joel has told me so much about you." Well, as much as she'd been able to drag out of him while they'd been at the cabin, anyways.

The other woman narrowed her gaze playfully at Joel. "All wonderful things, right?"

"Absolutely." His grin was full of charm, and his gaze was affectionate, making the bond between brother and sister evident to anyone who happened to see the two together.

"You've been trained well," she replied sassily. "Now, there's champagne and a dessert table, and soda if you prefer, so please enjoy whatever you'd like while you're browsing."

Joel frowned. "What, no beer?"

"Funny, but Cameron asked the same thing, as did Steve." She put her hands on her slender hips and shook her head in mock distaste. "Now come on, Joel. Does this look like a beer kind of joint to you?"

He chuckled in amusement. "Okay, I get your point." He glanced at Lora. "How about something to drink?"

"Sure. I'll take a glass of champagne."

"Me, too," Mia added with a persuasive smile.

"Two glasses of champagne, coming right up," Joel said, and headed over to the bar that had been sent up for the evening.

"Your designs are absolutely amazing," Lora said, once Joel was gone.

"Thank you." Mia beamed, basking in the compliment, and rightly so. "I have to admit, it's such a thrill to be able to open my own gallery. There was a time when I thought my designs would never see the light of day, let alone have people purchasing them."

"They're unique and gorgeous. All of them," Lora told her, then looked back at the one with the exotic fairy. "Though I do have to say that this piece is my favorite so far."

"I just finished that one a few days ago." Mia seemed to consider the jewel-toned design with a fresh perspective. "It was probably one of my most challenging designs I've ever done. Piecing together the shards of glass for the fairy's wings was a true nightmare."

Despite the complaint, Lora could tell that Mia loved what she did and was happy with the end results of this "Midsummer Dream."

"You know, I can't help but think that you look so familiar to me," Mia said, studying Lora through inquisitive eyes. "Have we met before?"

"I don't think so." If they'd been introduced in the past, Lora would have remembered someone as vibrant as Mia. But she did get that do-I-know-you question every once in a while, due to where she worked. "Unless maybe you've been to The Electric Blue? I'm a waitress there."

Mia snapped her fingers. "That's it! That's exactly where I've seen you before, though I have to admit it's been a while since I've been there."

"Too busy working on your designs?" Lora guessed.

She flashed a nice sized diamond solitaire encircling her left ring finger. "That, and The Electric Blue isn't quite the place an engaged woman should frequent." Her gray eyes took on a mischievous sparkle. "But I have to say that I did enjoy myself at that bar immensely when I was single."

"Ahhh, there she is." A tall, good-looking man with sandy blond hair and a charming grin approached the two of them, with Joel walking beside him. "No wonder I couldn't find you. You've been hiding out in this corner over here."

"I'm not hiding," Mia said, and took the glass of champagne that the man handed to her, while Lora thanked Joel for hers. "I'm just enjoying a conversation with Joel's… client." Mia slanted her brother a sly glance that said she didn't quite believe that their relationship was that simple. "Lora, this is my fiancé, Cameron. Cam, this is Lora."

Once the introductions were made, confusion creased Cameron's brows as he glanced back at Mia. "Did you say that she's a client of Joel's?"

Joel jumped in to explain the situation, but it was obvious that Mia had her doubts. Those expressive eyes of hers made it clear that she was wondering what the real scoop was when it came to her and Joel. Unfortunately, their relationship had truly reverted back to a platonic business arrangement and it didn't show any signs of changing back to something more intimate anytime soon.

Cameron gently touched Mia's arm. "I hate to be rude and steal you away, but there's someone I want you to meet."

Mia smiled at her fiancé. "Oh, okay." Then she transferred her gaze to Lora. "Don't be a stranger. Stop in at the gallery anytime. Oh, and I give a nice discount to family and friends."

"That's good to know. Thank you." Lora took a sip of her bubbly champagne, finding it incredibly nice of Mia to extend the discount to her, as well. "I'll be sure to bring my best friend by soon. She'll love your artwork."

"Wonderful." Mia waggled her fingers at them as she walked away with Cameron. "I'll see you two around."

"She's a little whirlwind, isn't she?" Joel said, chuckling and more relaxed than Lora had seen him in days. "Here one minute, gone the next."

"I really like her."

"The feeling is definitely mutual," he said, and smiled. "By the way, I saw my brothers and cousins when I went to get your champagne. Come on, and I'll introduce you to them."

His hand came to rest at the small of her back again as he guided her around the various partitions to the other side of the gallery, where it was more crowded. Guests were gathered in circles, talking and laughing, while others mingled from group to group to visit with everyone. Joel led her toward a fairly large cluster of people, and that's when she was introduced to his large family as a client-including his two brothers, Scott and Alex, his three male cousins, and all their spouses. The Wilde men were similar in looks, with their thick black hair and gorgeous blue eyes, and after a round of handshakes and friendly hellos, she felt quite overwhelmed.

She latched on to a familiar face standing next to her, Ashley St. Claire, who was married to Joel's older brother Scott and managed the hotel where Lora worked. They chatted for a few minutes, then Ashley glanced at the other women in the group.

"Come on, ladies," Ashley announced, "let's let the men catch up while we indulge in a bit of retail therapy. We need to make sure we keep Mia in business for a long time to come."

At the mention of retail therapy, the men let out a collective groan, and the women just laughed.

"That sounds good to me," Alex's wife, Dana, said with a grin.

"Me, too," Chayse added, and made a big deal of batting her lashes coquettishly at her husband, Adrian, in an obvious attempt to soften him up. "Since we're supporting Mia, I take it I can buy whatever I want?"

All the men stared expectantly at Adrian, knowing that whatever his answer, it would set a precedent for their wives, too.

Adrian exhaled a deep breath and smiled down at Chayse. "You go right ahead and buy whatever your heart desires, sweetheart."

Another round of deep groans echoed from the other men, the mingled sounds echoing their disappointment in Adrian's response.

"Thanks, man," Alex said dryly, and slapped his cousin on the back. "You just gave all our wives carte blanche, you know that, right?"

Adrian shrugged unapologetically. "Hey, I like getting it on a regular basis, you know what I mean?"

The other guys caught on immediately and nodded in agreement, then made sure they issued the same bit of freedom to their significant others.

Liz and Jill joined them, too, both of whom were expecting and appeared to be close to the same number of months along in their pregnancy.

Easy, friendly conversation ensued among all the women as they strolled around the showroom and looked at each individual design. By the time they were done a while later, Ashley had selected a few pieces of the stained glass artwork, one for herself and the others as gifts, and the other women had each purchased at least one design, too. When Lora didn't find anything she liked better than the fairy pattern, she decided to splurge and purchase the piece, but when she went back to buy the artwork, there was already a sold sticker on it.

Disappointed, but figuring it wasn't meant to be, Lora followed the women back to where the drinks and desserts were set up, which was close enough to see the men, but far enough away for the women to enjoy their own conversation. After perusing the desserts and everyone selecting a few items, they walked to a nearby lounge area, so that Jill and Liz could sit down in the two comfortable chairs and relax and rest their feet.

Jill gasped and pressed a hand to her belly, which looked to be the same size as Liz's. "This one sure is active," she said with an uncomfortable grimace.

Lora finished eating a delicious petit four and glanced at Jill, who was nibbling on a chocolate-covered strawberry. "Are the two of you due around the same time?" she asked.

Liz and Jill looked at one another and burst out laughing. Even Dana and Ashley chuckled, too, though Lora had no idea what was so funny.

"It's going to be a close call," Liz said with a sigh. "Again."

Lora still didn't get the joke. "Again?"

"Yes, again," Jill said with a nod, then went on to explain. "Believe it or not, our first babies were born on the same day."

Now, Lora understood and she grinned. "Ahhh, and you think that's going to happen this time, too?"

"Well, considering we found out that we were pregnant only one week apart from one another, it's a possibility."

"The guys are already taking bets on whose baby is going to be born first, just like they did last time," Liz said, and rolled her eyes at their husbands' antics. "Those men are so damn competitive, even when it comes to this."

While Liz and Jill talked about their most recent sonograms and what they thought the sexes of their babies were going to be, Lora casually glanced toward the Wilde men, and Joel in particular. Interestingly enough, she immediately noticed how he kept himself apart from everyone else in the group, mainly his brothers. His hands were pushed into his front pants pockets, and there was an air of reserve about him that she never would have equated with the Joel she'd come to know.

For a man who was so confident and take-charge in every other aspect of his life, when it came to his family he made himself blend into the background, when he was usually a guy who was bigger than life. And it wasn't as though they were excluding him from their conversation, but it was just so obvious to Lora, especially after her discussion with Joel at the cabin, that he felt as though he didn't fit in and didn't have that bond that his two brothers, Scott and Alex, did.

She supposed that over the many years since his mother's death, Joel's actions had just become routine and automatic, and everyone around him accepted his remote personality as all a part of his tough military image. But now, Lora knew his outward appearance of indifference went so much deeper. Knew that somewhere deep inside there was still a small part of that little boy he'd once been, the one who craved acceptance and a sense of belonging-despite the fact that he'd been the one to distance himself from his family.

But that's the man he'd become in order to cope with the loss of his mother at such a young age. He'd taken his feelings and shut them away, which had been so much easier than dealing with them.

But cutting off his emotions had affected him on other levels of his life, most obviously with relationships, and now especially with them. But she couldn't coerce him to change, or force him to love her-she'd learned that lesson with Brent and knew that it was all up to Joel to want to change. To allow himself to be loved in return.

Her own emotions tightened in her chest, and she finally tore her gaze from Joel and joined the conversation going on among the women.

From there, the evening went by quickly, and before long it was time to leave. She and Joel said their goodbyes to everyone and headed back to her place. Just as they'd walked into her apartment, the cell phone clipped to the waistband of Joel's pants vibrated.

He flipped the unit open and pressed it to his ear. "Yeah?" Joel answered, and just by that informal greeting Lora knew it was one of the ESS guys. Instinctively knew, too, why they were calling.

She listened to the one-way conversation from Joel's end, feeling a jolt of anticipation that this situation was finally over, along with a sense of dread because of what it meant for her and Joel. The end, as well. There was nothing left for him to stay for.

A few minutes later, he snapped the phone shut and turned to face her. "It's done," he said quietly, his gaze not quite meeting hers. "All of it. Mendoza is paid off with interest, your insurance policy is off the table, and you and Zach are both in the free and clear."

After weeks of upheaval, the relief rushing through her was incredibly welcome. "What about Zach?"

"Kevin is taking him to a rehab center as we speak," he said, making way too much of a production of clipping his phone back in place-a stall tactic, she knew, so he didn't have to look at her and deal with the emotional fallout between them. "We already have him registered and the place is expecting him. Most likely, he'll be there for a few months."

"I don't care. Whatever it takes to get him over his addictions and back on track." When Joel still found reasons not to glance her way, she closed the distance between them and curled her fingers around his forearm, giving it a gentle, meaningfully squeeze. "Thank you, Joel, for everything," she said softly. "For taking care of me, and for saving Zach."

Finally he met her gaze. An easygoing smile curved his lips, belying the deeper, darker pain she detected in his eyes-a telltale sign that maybe, hopefully, walking away from her wasn't going to be so easy after all. "Taking care of you was easy," he said huskily. "As for Zach, I owed him. He saved my life, and now I'm going to save his ass. I'm sure he's going to go through more hell in that rehab center than I did when I got shot in my leg, but I'm hoping he'll thank me for it later."

"I'm sure he will." She let her hand drop back down to her side as an awkward silence settled between them. "So, this is it, then? We're done?" The last question deliberately held dual meaning, and considering how his jaw clenched ever-so-slightly, he'd caught her subtle double entendre.

He exhaled a ragged breath and reached for his duffel bag, which he'd left at the end of the sofa. "Yeah, we're done," he said, his tone low and rough, as if he'd just swallowed a handful of gravel. "Just let me pack up my things, and I'll finally be out of your way."

He'd never been in her way, and he knew it, too. Yet he was scrambling to get his things together and leave, instead of facing what was still between them. It was exactly what she'd expected, and his quick retreat shouldn't have hurt, but it did.

She sat down on the sofa as he went to retrieve his shaving kit from the bathroom. Already, she was dreading how alone and quiet it was going to be in her apartment once he was gone.

As she watched him pack his toiletries and finish stuffing the rest of his items into his bag, she realized that she didn't want him to leave without knowing how she felt about him. Mostly, she didn't want to live with regrets of what she should have said and done before he exited her life. She was going to lay her heart and soul bare. She'd tell him the truth, let him know that she'd fallen in love with him, and maybe, hopefully, he'd allow her to love him in all the ways he needed and deserved.

"I guess that's it." He zipped up his duffel bag and reluctantly glanced at her. "I'll be on an assignment for the next few weeks, but if you need me for anything at all, you have my cell number."

God, she needed him already. Before she lost her courage, she stood up from the couch and rubbed her damp hands down the sides of her skirt. "Joel, before you go, there's something I need to tell you."

He looked at her warily, then apparently sensing her nervousness, his gaze narrowed with a please-don't-go-there warning. The kind that men gave women when they sensed an emotional conversation on the horizon, and in this case he'd be right.

"Okay," he said, but his unwillingness to hear what she had to say was very obvious in the tense set of his jaw and the way his hands had curled into fists at his side.

But at least he stayed, and she was grateful for even that much from him.

"I know this isn't something you want to hear, but I'm going to say it anyway." She swallowed to ease the sudden dryness in her mouth. "I'm in love with you, Joel."

He looked away from her and swore beneath his breath, the sound filled with frustration and a hint of anger. His adverse response was as effective as rebuffing every bit of intimacy they'd shared, and felt the equivalent of being shot straight through the heart, leaving her breathless and aching.

She really shouldn't have been surprised by his reaction, because she'd known better than to expect a declaration of undying love in return. But she knew that Joel cared for her. Knew there was something real and honest between them that could grow into so much more if he'd let it. And therein lay their problem-his inability to open up and let her in to all those places that had been empty for so long, he didn't know anything else.

"Look, I don't expect anything in return," she said, knowing that was a big, fat lie. "You made your position on relationships and being committed very clear to me, and I'm not asking for any of that. I just wanted you to know how I felt."

"Lora… I can't." His tone was as tortured as the look in his dark blue eyes. "I just can't do it."

She walked toward him, closing the distance between them, and placed a hand on his cheek. "That's where you're wrong, Joel. You could do it. If you really wanted to." She skimmed her fingers along his jaw before letting them fall away. "You're just so used to being on the outside looking in, to being the odd man out, that you don't know anything else."

A frown creased his brows. "What are you talking about?" he asked gruffly.

"I saw it tonight at your sister's gallery, Joel. I saw how you were with your brothers, how you kept yourself apart from them because it's just an instinctive thing for you and something you've done since your mother's death. But it doesn't have to be that way. At least not with me."

He didn't say anything, but the pain in his eyes spoke more than words ever could. He hated being on the outside, but it was all he'd ever known.

"Sometimes you just have to put yourself out there emotionally and take a chance," she suggested, then shook her head at the irony of that statement. "I can't believe I'm saying that to someone who claims to be a risk-taker, a man who is strong and fearless and risks his life to protect others, and would willingly put himself in the direct line of danger if a situation warrants it. It seems the one and only aspect of your life that you do play it safe with is your heart and your relationships."

His eyes flashed with irritation. "With good reason."

She smiled, knowing better. Possibly knowing him better than he knew himself. "So you keep saying, but I've yet to find a reason that you can't work through, if you really wanted to."

He stared at her for a long, hard moment, then picked up his duffel bag, effectively putting an end to a conversation he didn't want to hear or face. "I need to go."

"I know," she said softly, and didn't say anything more as he turned around and headed toward the front door. He walked out without looking back, and she let him go, even though it was the hardest thing she'd ever had to do.

With a sigh that seemed to unravel her from the inside out, she sat back down on the couch, already feeling the quiet and solitude of her apartment closing in on her. Yeah, she had her life back, but it sure didn't amount to much without Joel in it.

Chapter Nineteen

SYDNEY stared at her reflection in the bathroom mirror, not sure that she even recognized the woman staring back at her anymore. Sure, she was very familiar with those green eyes-though currently red and puffy from a crying jag, and lined by dark circles due to her sleepless nights-and auburn curls, and even that voluptuous body that she saw on a daily basis and had been using to her advantage for years now, but she was referring to the person inside the body. And for the past few days since Daniel had walked out of her life, she'd spent a whole lot of time wondering how in the world she'd gotten to this point in her life… and, more shocking, she wasn't sure she liked who and what she'd become.

Oh, she knew that her past circumstances had molded her into someone driven, yet cautious when it came to relationships. Not to mention jaded and untrusting of men and their motives. Thanks to Tim Carson, it had become an instinctive part of her personality, as well as her way of protecting her heart and emotions and never allowing anyone to ever use her again for their own personal gain.

For years she'd been the one in control when it came to men and relationships. She called the shots. She took what she wanted and walked away when she'd had enough. For her and the guys she'd chosen to date, it had always been about having a good time and uncomplicated sex.

Until Daniel. He was the one man who'd ever wanted more than just sex from her, and it had scared the crap out of her. So did the emotions and feelings he'd stirred within her that were so foreign to her woman's heart. The wanting. The yearning. The need to let him be a part of her life beyond that physical attraction.

She drew in a shaky breath and swiped at the fresh batch of tears surging to the surface. She'd spent a whole lot of time thinking about everything Daniel had said to her, and now she tried to see herself from his perspective, beyond her looks, her ample curves, and all that superficial crap she'd hidden behind for much too long. And what she saw was a woman who wished she had someone to share her burdens with, beyond Lora. A woman who craved stability, the comfort of a man's embrace, and a shoulder to lean on during those rough times. But mostly what she saw was a woman who ached to be loved unconditionally.

Daniel had offered her all those things, and she'd pushed him away because she was too scared to believe someone like him, someone so honest and caring and a man who treated her with respect, could be for real. When he said he didn't care about her past, she'd desperately wanted to believe him. When he'd told her that it was okay to let him love her because he wasn't going to disappoint her like so many had in her past, instead of trusting him, she'd pushed him away out of fear.

And now, she was alone, and for the first time in her life, her heart hurt. And that brash and bold woman who used her body, and sex, to her advantage, no longer appealed to her.

It was a hard realization to face. Harder still to think about how her actions and feelings about men might have affected Cassie and her chance at a solid relationship with a man someday.

She'd spent years sheltering and protecting her daughter, because she never wanted Cassie to experience what she'd gone through. Yet, if her daughter judged Sydney by her actions and how she treated men and relationships, her less-than-exemplary behavior contradicted everything Sydney wanted to teach Cassie about relationships, and intimacy with the right person.

But in order to do that, Sydney needed to show her daughter that a monogamous relationship could work, that stability with one person was important. That a healthy, mature, and caring relationship could exist, if she made the right choices in her life. And it was time that Sydney changed her own ways and led by example.

With that decision made, she reached for a Kleenex, dabbed at her still-moist eyes, and blew her nose. She needed to go and talk to Daniel, and she prayed that she hadn't ruined any chance of a future together by shutting him out so completely.

"Mom? Are you okay?"

At the sound of Cassie's soft, worried voice, Sydney turned around and found her daughter standing just beyond her bathroom door. Quickly she summoned a smile, but there was nothing she could do for her puffy eyes and red nose from her crying jag. "I'm fine, honey."

"No, you're not," Cassie insisted with a concerned frown. "What's wrong, Mom?"

"Nothing, really." Sydney tossed the tissue into the trash and headed into her bedroom, with Cassie trailing behind. "Just a little PMS. You know how that is." She wasn't ready to talk about her relationship with Daniel with Cassie, not until she talked to Daniel himself to see where things stood between them.

Her daughter didn't look convinced, but she didn't push the issue, either. Instead, when Sydney started making her mussed-up bed, Cassie went the other side of the mattress to help smooth out the covers and pull up the comforter.

It was almost noon on Saturday, and as she glanced at Cassie, this time she noticed that her daughter had straightened her hair and had put on a light application of makeup, including lip gloss. She was wearing a pair of brown cords and a long-sleeved V-neck sweater, and while the outfit itself was casual, Sydney was used to seeing her daughter in jeans or sweats on the weekend. And more disturbing was the scent of the Love's Baby Soft perfume her daughter had put on.

"What's up with you?" Sydney asked lightly as she fluffed her pillow before folding the comforter over it. "You going somewhere today that I don't know about?"

Cassie shifted on her feet as Sydney rounded the bed to where her daughter was standing. She looked a little anxious, and the way she chewed on her bottom lip was a dead giveaway that something was going on with Cassie. It was one of those mannerisms that a mother picked up on early in her child's life that gave her the edge of being able to read her kid before they even spoke. In this case, that lip chewing thing was enough to tell Sydney that Cassie was feeling uncertain and nervous about something.

Finally, Cassie said, "I wanted to know if I could go to the mall today with Becky, and maybe catch a movie, too."

Normally, a fun day out with her girlfriend wouldn't be a cause for concern. However, coming only days after Sydney's meeting with Daniel about her why her daughter had been deliberately sabotaging her math grade, Sydney couldn't help but wonder if an outing to the local mall was a ploy to meet a boy.

Sydney inhaled a deep breath and forced herself to remain calm. Since she'd been so upset and emotional after her conversation with Daniel, she hadn't talked to Cassie about her deception, but she knew it was time. Time to let her daughter know that she was aware of what was going on, and time to let her little Tinker Bell be the fifteen-year-old teenager she'd become-no matter how difficult that would be.

But first, she needed to know what she was dealing with, and what, exactly, her daughter was up to. "Is Ryan going to be there?" she asked.

Cassie's eyes widened into huge pools of panic at the unexpected question. "I… uh… how did you know about Ryan?"

It wasn't a yes or no answer, but overall Sydney was grateful that her daughter hadn't denied knowing Ryan, or worse, lied and said she had no idea what Sydney was talking about. And if she wanted to keep that trust and line of communication open with her daughter, then she knew it had to start here and now.

Sydney sat down on the bed, and patted the space beside her. "Come here and sit down, honey," she said gently, knowing that anger wouldn't resolve this situation. If anything, it would push her daughter away, and that was the last thing she wanted. "We need to talk."

Reluctantly, and with a worried look on her face, Cassie did as she asked.

"A few days ago, Daniel called me and said he needed to talk to me about your inconsistent homework and math tests," Sydney told her. "After watching you in class and at after school tutoring and seeing how Ryan was flirting with you, he realized that you might be deliberately dropping your test scores and grades for the sole purpose of getting into after school tutoring so you could be with Ryan. Is that true?"

Tears filled Cassie's eyes, along with a healthy dose of dread. "Yes," she said, her voice cracking.

Sydney closed her eyes, trying to process the truth, and trying, as well, to deal with this revelation on a rational level. When she looked at Cassie again, it was clear that her daughter expected her to come unglued over the situation. And oh, Sydney wanted to, in the worst way, but managed to tamp down the urge to yell at Cassie for doing something so stupid. She'd learned a lot from Lora over the years, and even more from Daniel.

So instead, she gently thumbed away a tear making its way down her soft cheek. "Cass, why would you do something like that?" Sydney wanted, needed, to understand, even though she suspected she already knew the reason-that Cassie's overbearing, way-too-protective mother had pushed her daughter to sneak around to be with a boy.

"Because I really like him, Mom, and I knew you'd never let me go out with him or see him after school," she said, confirming Sydney's greatest fears. "I'm so sorry."

There was a wealth of regret glimmering in Cassie's gaze, which reassured Sydney. Cassie wasn't a defiant child-never had been-and Sydney didn't want to give her any reason to start now. But there were a few more questions she needed to ask her daughter.

"Was he at the Halloween party you went to?" she asked.

Cassie nodded. "Yes, but we didn't do anything. We just talked and danced. I swear!"

Sydney chose to believe her, and as long as Cassie told her the truth, they could work through any situation together. "And were you going to meet him at the mall today?"

Cassie swallowed hard. "Yes. But I was going to be with Becky, too." Then, she buried her face in her hands. "Oh, God, you're going to ground me for life, aren't you?"

Holding back a smile at her daughter's dramatic display, Sydney pulled Cassie's hands away so she could look into her eyes. "Truly, if I had my way, I'd keep you my little girl forever, but that's just not going to happen, now is it?"

Cassie shook her head. "No. I'm fifteen years old, and you need to let me grow up."

"I know," Sydney admitted. "It's just hard for me to accept sometimes, but I promise to work on being better about it."

Cassie stared at Sydney, a humorous look changing her expression. "Who are you and what have you done with my real mother?"

Sydney laughed, knowing that this sudden change of hers must be a shock to her daughter. "I'm still your same old mom. I'm just trying to handle things differently, in a way that will hopefully strengthen our relationship."

Reaching out, she smoothed Cassie's auburn hair away from her beautiful face. A face that had matured over the years and would no doubt turn male heads one day-if it wasn't already. Cassie was a good kid, and Sydney's goal was to keep her that way as much as possible. "It's important that you talk to me and tell me the truth, always, and I promise to listen and give you the best advice that I can. But this doesn't mean you have free rein to run wild and do whatever you want. I still have final say, okay?"

Cassie rolled her eyes. "I'm not going to run wild, Mom. I just want to have fun, like the rest of my friends."

And Sydney had to trust that her daughter would make the right decisions and not be swayed by peer pressure when it came to all those issues that every teenager came up against at some point in their lives.

"Mom… what's going on with you and Mr. Barnett?"

Just as she'd thrown her daughter off kilter with her unexpected question about Ryan, Cassie had just done the same to her. "Why?" Sydney asked curiously, unsure what her daughter knew. "Did he say something to you?"

"No," she said, shaking her head. "But you've been crying the past few days, which you never do, and he wasn't in a great mood yesterday at school, so I thought that maybe the two of you had a fight or something."

If she expected Cassie to be truthful at all times, her daughter deserved the same respect. "Yeah, we had a fight."

A frown creased Cassie's brows. "Are you not dating any longer?"

"No, but I'm hoping to change that." Then a thought dawned on Sydney. "Does my seeing Daniel bother you?"

Cassie shrugged. "At first, I wasn't thrilled about it, but I really like Mr. Barnett and he seemed to make you happy. So even though it's not the coolest thing for my mom to be dating my math teacher, I guess I can live with it."

Sydney grinned. "Thanks." She'd always kept the men she'd dated in the past out of Cassie's life because it made no sense to bring a man into her daughter's life who was only going to be around for a few days or weeks at the most. But Daniel was Sydney's first real, serious relationship, and her daughter's acceptance and approval mattered to her.

Cassie bit her bottom lip again. "Ummm, you never did say if I could go to the mall today."

Sydney thought a moment before answering, letting her daughter sweat it out just a bit. "I'll tell you what. I'll make a deal with you. How about I drive you and Beck to the mall so I can meet Ryan for myself, and then the three of you can hang out for a few hours, and go to a movie."

A horrified look transformed Cassie's features. "Mom!" she wailed in protest. "Do I have to make Ryan meet you?"

Apparently, it wasn't so cool to have the boy you liked meet your mom so early in the game, but Sydney held firm, needing her daughter to realize that she was still setting boundaries for her. "Yeah, you do. That's the deal, and a damn good one, I'd say, considering what you've put me through the past few weeks." She gently chucked Cassie beneath the chin. "So take it or leave it. It's your choice."

"I'll take it," Cassie grumbled.

"That's what I thought." Sydney stood, and so did Cassie. But before her daughter could walk out of the bedroom, Sydney pulled her into a tight hug.

"I love you, Cass," she whispered into her ear. "You know that right?"

Cassie pulled back and grinned. "Of course I know you love me. You tell me every single day. And, I love you, too."

At that moment, Sydney felt more content and fulfilled than she had in a very long time. Like she'd finally come to terms with her past, her fears, and just maybe it wouldn't screw up her future. She'd resolved her dilemma with her daughter, now she had one more issue to go. Sydney just hoped that Daniel was as easy to sway as her daughter had been.

THE last person Daniel expected to find standing on his doorstep on a Saturday evening was Sydney. One, because he never thought he'd see her again after how they'd parted ways, and two, she normally worked at The Electric Blue on the weekends. So this was a surprise in many ways, though he was reserving judgment as to whether or not her visit was a good or bad thing until he found out why she was there.

"Can I come in?" she asked, a slight, hesitant smile curving her glossy lips.

No matter what happened between the two of them, he'd never turn her away. He also wanted to believe that if things didn't work out with them, they could at least be friends, and he extended that olive branch to her now.

"Sure." He stepped back and let her walk past him into the entryway, then shut the door behind her, wishing she didn't look and smell so damn good. He led the way into the living room, switched off the TV show he'd been watching, and turned back to Sydney.

"Would you like something to drink?" he asked pleasantly.

She shook her head, though he could tell that she wasn't quite sure what to make of his amicable attitude. "No, thank you."

While it was cold outside, it was warm in the house, and she was wrapped up in a wool coat. "Can I take your coat?" he asked.

She shifted anxiously on her feet, which were encased in a pair of sexy red pumps, the kind that made him think of a dozen erotic scenarios that included her wearing those seductive heels. "I… ummm, sure," she said, and unbelted the sash.

Once the coat was off, she handed it to him, and he laid it over the back of a nearby recliner. When he turned around and glanced at Sydney again, his mouth went bone dry. She was wearing a red blouse to match her shoes, and a pair of jeans that showcased her phenomenal curves. The bright, cherry color suited her normal outrageous personality and take-charge attitude, yet at the moment that brash and bold female was no where to be seen. In her place was a woman with uncertainty in her eyes who was wringing her hands nervously.

He stood across from Sydney, fighting the urge to wrap her in the security of his arms and give her the reassurance she seemed to be searching for. He didn't, only because he had to know what she'd come here to say. "So, what brings you by?" he asked in his most casual tone.

"You. Us." She glanced away from him and let out a low, defeated groan. "God, I am so not good at this sort of thing," she muttered.

The first part of her reply gave him hope, and the second comment almost made him smile, because she just looked so adorable, like a young girl coming clean with her first crush. And in a lot of ways, he supposed he was exactly that for her.

Even though he had a pretty good indication of where she was heading with her emotional statement, he prompted her to finish what she'd just started. She needed to say the words as much as he needed to hear them. "What thing are you talking about, Sydney?"

She met his gaze, looking so sweet and vulnerable. So everything he wanted and needed in his life. "You know, that thing called a relationship?"

He tipped his head. "Is that why you're here?"

"Yeah," Sydney whispered achingly. "I don't know what to say or do to make up for the way I treated you the other night, and I wish I could take back some of the things I said. I never meant to hurt you."

The relief that Daniel felt in that moment was incredibly profound-that he hadn't lost this woman he'd come to love. "I know. You were scared, and that was your way of protecting your emotions, and I understand that, Sydney," he said, and slowly walked toward her. "I understand you more than you realize."

Because he cared. Because he hadn't allowed sex to get in the way of knowing her, really knowing her and who she was beneath the I-don't-give-a-damn façade she'd hidden behind for so long. Because he'd stayed around long after most men would have cut their losses and moved on.

"There's more I need to tell you," she said. "I talked to Cassie about her math and Ryan."

"And?" he asked curiously.

"I think we've come to an understanding." She smiled, obviously proud of what she'd accomplished with her daughter. "I'm going to try and lighten up with her and boys and being a teenager, and she promised to be open and honest with me, though I know she'll slip up from time to time."

He chuckled and folded his arms loosely over his chest. "Most teenagers do, but it's a fair compromise."

"I think so," Sydney said, and wished she still didn't feel so uncertain about where she stood with Daniel. He'd yet to touch her, or give her any sign that he still wanted her to be a part of his life, and it was making her insane not knowing.

"And it's a great start, Sydney," he said, his tone low and sincere. "I know you mean well with Cassie, but she'll be just fine out there in the big, bad world."

She laughed, the sound more nervous than humorous. "God, I hope so."

His features turned serious. "Now, back to you and me."

She steeled herself for the very worst-like the brush-off she deserved after everything she'd put him through.

He raised a blond brow. "So, what are we going to do about this thing that's a bone of contention between the two of us?"

She'd always been the one to deny any form of a relationship, and now it was up to her to acknowledge that she was ready and willing to give one a try. "I want a relationship with you, Daniel, and everything that goes with it. But as you know, I haven't had a whole lot of experience in that department, so you need to be patient with me, okay?" She laid all her insecurities bare, trusting him to help her along the way, and especially when those fears reared their ugly head.

Finally, finally, he reached out and caressed his fingers along her jaw, then cupped her cheek in his large, warm palm. "We'll do this together, every step of the way, I promise."

Her throat tightened with emotion, and she closed her eyes, absorbing the strength and tenderness of his hand framing her face. He was the first man who'd ever touched her so gently, and without sexual intent, and it stirred feelings like she'd never experienced before. She felt so safe with him, so protected and cared for, and she knew deep in her heart that this man would never, ever intentionally hurt her.

"I can't believe what a lucky man I am," he said huskily, and grazed his thumb along her bottom lip. "I'm even luckier to be your first."

She blinked her eyes back open and frowned, certain she'd misheard him. "My first?" She was far from being a virgin.

"Your first relationship," he clarified with a sexy, wicked grin. "And, I'm hoping, your last."

Her heart felt full enough to burst. "I like the sound of that."

With a sexy growl, he slid an arm around her waist and pulled her flush to his body, which was hard and hot against hers, despite their clothing. Then he lowered his head and kissed her, and she opened herself up to him-her heart, her soul, and everything else that had been locked up inside of her for much too long. He took her mouth with an added depth and intensity that eclipsed every kiss that had come before. This was magic, the kind that made her believe in the possibility of a happily ever after. She tasted the sweetness of a lifelong promise, the assurance that he'd always be there for her, and the patience to trust and believe in the future and everything it had to offer.

And underlying it all was all the heat and passion that always simmered between them… and the desire that had yet to be fulfilled.

He ended the kiss and pressed his forehead to hers, and she knew there was one more thing she had to say before she lost the nerve. "Daniel…" She swallowed hard and forced out the words. "I'm falling in love with you, and I have to admit that it scares the hell out of me."

"Ahhh, another first, huh?" he teased gently.

She shot him a mock glare. "Stop gloating already. You're going to get a big head."

He laughed, and his chest rumbled against hers, creating a delicious friction that made her breasts swell and her nipples harden. "I can't help myself," he said, then the mischievous sparkle in his gaze faded to something warmer and more intimate. "And just so you know, I'm a little ahead of you on this one, sweetheart. I'm already in love with you, and I'm more than willing to wait for you to catch up."

What an amazing man Daniel was, and she couldn't believe that he was all hers. Unable to help herself, she threw her arms around his neck and kissed him again, just because she could, but this time their embrace turned hot and hungry very quickly.

When they pulled back, they were both breathing hard.

Daniel skimmed a hand down her back and over the curve of her bottom, pulling her closer, if that was even possible. "God, Sydney, I want you so much," he groaned against her neck.

The evidence of his desire pressed against her, hard and thick and needy. The feel of him made her equally hot and bothered. "Well, I've devoted myself to you and this relationship thing we've got going on," she drawled teasingly. "So, how long are you going to make me wait until we make love?"

He lifted his head and stared into her eyes. "Make love, not have sex," he murmured, clearly pleased with her choice of words. "I think right now would be absolutely perfect."

Taking her hand in his, he led her down the hallway to his bedroom, and it didn't take long for the two of them to strip off each other's clothes. Seeing him naked for the first time, his gorgeous body made everything feminine in her respond like it truly was her first time, and she absorbed the breathtaking feeling, then locked it away in her heart like a rare treasure.

She reached out and flattened her hand on his chest, right over his rapidly beating heart. Then holding his gaze, she oh-so-slowly glided her palm downward, exploring hot skin and firm muscle, all the way down to his flat belly, then lower still. Eventually, she wrapped her fingers around his erection and stroked him once, twice, until he groaned deep in his throat and grasped her wrist to make her stop.

He shoved the bed covers out of the way and pressed her down onto the cool, crisp sheets. He joined her, his gaze dark and hot as he pushed her legs apart so he could kneel in between. But instead of moving over her and taking her as she'd come to expect from her own experience, he lifted her left leg and kissed her ankle… and from there, he started his slow, leisurely exploration of her body.

He nibbled on her calf and ran his tongue along the sensitive patch of skin at the back of her knee, where she discovered she was soooo sensitive, and very ticklish. She squirmed and tried not to giggle, then laughter became a moot point as he trailed hot, moist kisses along her inner thigh, making her moan, then gasp, when he pressed that incredible mouth of his against her sex.

The tip of his tongue teased the folds of flesh, and she closed her eyes, threaded her fingers through his hair, and languished in the pleasure he so selflessly gave her. He settled in and took his time, making her mindless with desire, making her beg for the release he held just out of her reach. Her orgasm, when he finally took her over that crest, hit her with the strength of a hurricane, sweeping her into another realm of ecstasy, far beyond any erotic fantasy she could have imagined.

Before she could touch back down to earth or catch her breath, he was easing his way up her body, trailing his lips across her abdomen, suckling her breasts, nibbling at the sensitive crook of her neck. Sighing, she ran her palms down his chest, wanting to reciprocate, but he gently pushed her hands away and murmured, "next time", then slanted his mouth across hers in another one of those slow, deep, bone-melting kisses.

He settled his hips against hers. She felt the tip of his shaft glide through the slick cleft between her legs, then fit its broad head against the opening that led to the core of her. Instinctively, she pulled her knees up until they were riding his waist, needing him inside her, to be part of her, with an ache that went soul deep.

And he knew. Knew what she needed, because he needed it, too.

With a thrust of his hips, he slid into her, and she arched to take all of him, until he was buried to the hilt. He groaned and shuddered, and gave them both what they wanted. With a hard, driving rhythm, he pumped into her body, deepening the contact, extending the pleasure that built and swelled with each endless stroke, until she felt him tense above her, then shudder with the force of his own orgasm.

After a short while, he lifted his head and glanced down at her face. Their gazes met and held in the soft lamplight, and the emotional intensity in his eyes, the heat and passion still glittering in the depths-all for her-was unlike anything she'd ever seen or felt before.

Tenderly, he brushed away a few wayward curls from her cheek and smiled at her. "You were so worth the wait," he said softly, reverently. "In every way."

She knew he wasn't just referring to the sex, and she was amazed at his ability to make her feel so much emotion, to make her heart so full.

In that moment, she knew it was this man who finally made her whole and complete. And no one else would ever come close.

"JEEZ, Wilde Man, you'd think by that dark look on your face we were heading to a funeral, instead of a strip club." Kevin gave Joel a firm shove in the arm. "Cheer up, will ya?"

Joel grunted in reply and pushed his hands into the front pockets of his jeans as they walked toward the entrance to Leather and Lace, a classy gentlemen's club where the guys had decided to spend the evening. Reluctantly, and after much ribbing, Joel had agreed to accompany his buddies, but now he was rethinking his decision. He wasn't great company these days, not since walking out on Lora three weeks ago, and he would have rather spent the evening alone, wallowing in his own misery.

"You'd think after that new three-week security case you just finished you'd be ready to appreciate some fine pieces of ass," Jon added with a lively grin. "And let me tell you, they've got nothing but the finest here."

"Oh, yeah," Kevin agreed with a cocky swagger. "We're about to see a bunch of naked women!"

Kevin and Jon glanced at each other and let out a jovial "ooh-rah!" at the same time, using the Marine Corps warrior cry to express their joint approval and enthusiasm.

Joel laughed and shook his head at his friends' ridiculous antics, then suddenly realized that Ben wasn't sharing in their enthusiasm. Oh, he'd definitely voted to hang out at the strip club, but it was apparent that Ben had something on his mind. That, and he was watching Joel too damn speculatively, which was starting to annoy the hell out of Joel.

Jon smirked. "I'm telling you, if Crimson Rose doesn't get a rise out of Joel, I'm writing him off as a lost cause."

Joel had heard enough about "Crimson Rose" to know that she was the star attraction at Leather and Lace on the weekends. He also knew the man who ran the establishment, a comrade from their time in Iraq, and since it had been a while since he'd seen him, he wondered if he might be there tonight.

As soon as the door opened to the club, they were greeted by a loud blast of music and a big hulk of a bouncer. Jon, Ben, and Kevin filtered inside the joint, and Joel stopped to talk to the bouncer.

"Would Nick Santori happen to be here tonight?" Joel asked.

"Sure thing," the guy replied with a nod. "He's around here somewhere. I'll let him know you're looking for him."

"Great, thanks."

Joel followed his buddies toward the bar, drawing stares from other patrons, which wasn't an unusual reaction when the four of them were together. Being ex-marines, they all possessed that military demeanor and confident attitude, and as a group in a male-dominated club, it was four times the intimidation factor.

"Semper fi, man."

Joel turned at the sound of the male voice, loud enough to be heard above the noise and music, and upon seeing his old friend, he extended his hand in greeting. "Hey, Nick."

The other man shook his hand in a firm grip. "Been a long time, Joel."

Joel nodded. "I figured I'd come in and see why this was so much better than coming to work with me at ESS."

As Nick acknowledged the other guys, Jon glanced toward the stage where a leggy redhead was stripped down to a rhinestone G-string and equally sparkly pasties. "I think I'm catching the vision," Jon said with a wolfish grin.

"What can I say?" Nick shrugged his wide shoulders. "I've settled down, become respectable." He grinned like the lucky man that he was. "And the little woman didn't want me doing anything as risky as working security with you guys."

Joel chuckled, but he could definitely understand the appeal of Nick's job.

His friend gestured to one of the hostesses and told her to get the four of them a good table. But just as the scantily clad woman started to lead them away, Nick stopped Joel one more time.

"Seriously, thanks for offering to let me in, but I'm pretty happy with what I'm doing."

"Got it," Joel said, though he wanted to make sure that the offer stood indefinitely. "Still, if you ever change your mind…" Pulling a crisp, white business card from the inside of his leather jacket, he handed it to Nick.

"Elite Security Specialists," he murmured, then glanced back at Joel and gave him a brief nod. "I'll keep it in mind."

Reaching out with his elbow bent and arm up, Joel grasped the other man's hand again in a brothers-of-the-field handshake, then went to join his group. He took the last vacant chair and ordered a bottle of Sam Adams from a cocktail waitress, who gave him a sultry once over, which did nothing to pique his interest or libido, despite her incredibly short shorts and tight white blouse that left little to the imagination.

Once she moved on to the next table, he slumped back in his seat, feeling oddly disconnected from everything around him. Or maybe it was more that he'd disconnected himself from everything but work, because the swank club not only catered to a customer's comfort and pleasure, but the women were centerfold gorgeous, and their barely there costumes should have gotten some kind of reaction out of him.

He watched a perky cheerleader strip off the seemingly innocent trappings of a schoolgirl, and sat through the performance of a cowgirl who knew how to straddle more than the brass pole in the middle of the stage. By the time a female cop ripped off her velcro uniform and pranced around in little more than her birthday suit, Joel was done with his beer, and done with the whole stripper gig. It just wasn't doing a thing for him.

"I'm outta here," he said, and started to stand.

Jon grabbed his forearm and yanked him back down into his seat. "You can't go anywhere until you've seen Crimson Rose perform, and she's up next. Trust me, this babe is hot, and well worth the wait."

Joel rolled his eyes, but reclined in his chair once more, just to be a good sport. The show began, and out strolled a curvaceous woman wearing red and pink rose petals all over her body, and a red velvet, rhinestone mask that only left her red lips and jaw visible, giving her an air of mystery, unlike all the other strippers, who'd bared all.

Jon and Kevin watched the show avidly, and while Ben seemed to enjoy the show, he was much more subdued and indifferent than their friends, which Joel found curious.

Within a few minutes, the woman's costume was down to a few rose petals and some colorful body art and a trailing vine. The mask remained in place, and Joel had to admit that she was definitely exotic and gorgeous and had a body that made a man think of every carnal sin, but the truth of the matter was that the only woman who filled his nightly dreams and haunted him during the day was Lora. Everything about her, from her smile to her scent to the way she understood him like no other, was embedded in his brain-and, he feared, his heart.

He'd spent three weeks working an on-site security case, thinking that the time away would clear his head and give him the space he needed to put everything back into perspective again after his time with Lora. No such luck. He used to be a carefree bachelor who would have thoroughly enjoyed a boys' night out like this, but all he was now was a miserable, moody son of a bitch.

The performance ended, and so did Joel's patience. This time when he stood, nobody tried to stop him. "I'm heading out," he said, and tossed down enough money to cover his beer and a generous tip. "I'll catch a cab back to my place, so you guys stay and enjoy the rest of the show."

Jon and Kevin stared at him as if he'd lost his mind for walking out on a bunch of naked women, and when Joel glanced at Ben, the other man was sitting very quietly in his seat with a knowing look on his face. Out of the three of them, Ben had a way of reading him the best, and Joel turned and walked toward the exit before Ben could call him on his pensive mood.

He stepped outside and dragged a much-needed deep breath of cool air into his lungs. Just as he reached into his jacket pocket to retrieve his cell phone and make a call for a cab, the main doors opened again and Ben started toward where he was walking along the side of the club.

"Hey, wait up," Ben said, picking up his pace to join him.

Joel stopped and groaned, seeing his moment of solitude, and his quick getaway, vanishing like the thin night air. "Yeah, what's up?"

The parking lot lights illuminated the concern in Ben's eyes. "I just want to make sure everything's okay. I don't think I've ever seen you walk out of a strip club before closing time," he added with a grin.

Joel sighed heavily and rubbed at the tension gathering at the back of his neck. "I'm fine. Just tired."

Ben raised a brow, clearly not believing the excuse. "It's Lora, isn't it?"

Just hearing her name aloud was enough to cause his stomach to clench, and he cut his gaze to Ben, unsure where this conversation was heading. And he certainly wasn't going to make any assumptions. "What are you talking about?"

"Oh, come off it, Joel," Ben said candidly, and braced his hands on his hips. "You know damn well what I'm talking about. You've been sulking around since we wrapped everything up with Zach and you ended things with Lora."

Joel glared at him. "I don't sulk."

"Yeah, whatever," the other man said with a wave of his hand. "The point is, you're being a stubborn ass about the whole thing."

"What do you know about it?" he asked, annoyed as hell at Ben's accusation.

Ben braced his legs apart and crossed his arms over his chest. "Remember that night you brought Lora to Nick's Sports Bar?"

There wasn't a moment that he'd spent with Lora that he'd forgotten, that night especially. "Yeah, I remember."

"It was so obvious that the two of you were attracted to one another, Are you telling me that nothing happened between you and Lora while you were protecting her?"

Joel stiffened, feeling way too transparent and not liking it one bit. "That's none of your fucking business."

His friend took his reply as an affirmative, and did nothing to disguise his smug look. "Yeah, I thought so."

Joel bit back another rude expletive telling Ben exactly where to go, and how to get there in blunt, precise terms.

Ben tipped his head and studied him reflectively. "Judging by what a prickly S.O.B. you've been lately, I'm going to take a wild guess and say that you fucked things up with her, didn't you?"

If Ben weren't such a good friend, Joel would have hauled off and decked him-as much to release some frustration as to get him to back off of the subject. "Leave it alone," he warned.

"Why? Because you can't handle the truth?" Ben laughed, clearly not afraid of Joel and his threat-and he had no reason to be, since they were pretty well matched in strength. "She's a great girl. You know it. I know it. Hell, even those two womanizers in there know it," he added, hooking a thumb back toward the club to indicate Jon and Kevin. "What the hell's holding you back?"

That was the question Joel dreaded, because it dug up issues he'd been running from his entire life. Painful, emotional issues he'd been too afraid to deal with, and instead had walked away from the one woman who'd cared enough to see beyond his reckless, military façade to the real man beneath.

She'd been so fearless in risking her heart for him, and even though he knew he felt the same for her, he hadn't been able to bring himself to say the words, or stay. No, he'd taken the coward's way out and bolted for the door in an attempt to put as much distance as possible between himself and those fears that were all but strangling him.

A man on the outside, always looking in. Truer words had never been spoken. Since his mother's death, keeping himself apart had become an automatic response for him, a way of protecting his emotions as a young boy, then later in life with women and relationships. Holding himself at a distance had even served him well in the military, and had become a way to insulate himself from the pain and anguish that came from being such a vital part of the war, and seeing good men die.

Yet as he looked at Ben, a man he'd served in the war with, a man who he'd trusted with his life and more, Joel realized that the bond he shared with Ben, Jon, Kevin, and even Zach was stronger than the one he had with his own brothers. These men would do anything for him, and vice versa, but for as close as he was with them, the day had come when that comradery and friendship just wasn't enough.

And if he didn't act for himself now, one day each of these men would create lives of their own that would hopefully include wives and children, and he'd be all alone, once again on the outside looking in. Being the confirmed bachelor he'd always sworn he' would be… with absolutely nothing to show for it.

No one to love, cherish, and care for.

And more than anything, he wanted that person to be Lora. She, out of all the women who'd come and gone throughout the years, had understood him like no other, and had given him that sense of belonging he'd craved, but that had eluded him for too long. Until her, there had never been another woman whom he thought was worth putting his heart and emotions on the line for.

He scrubbed a hand along his jaw and silently cursed himself for being such an idiot.

"Don't think about it anymore, Wilde Man, just do it," Ben urged, as if sensing Joel's hesitation and internal turmoil. "Beg, grovel, and do whatever it takes, but go get the girl already, before some other guy comes along and realizes what a catch she is."

The thought of another man so much as touching Lora spurred Joel to action, and he flipped open his cell phone and made the call for a cab, and was promised one would arrive within the next ten minutes. With his decision made, and now anxious to get to Lora as quickly as possible, he knew it would feel like ten hours.

He tucked the unit back onto his waistband and turned back to Ben, realizing his friend was still standing there when he should have been inside tucking dollar bills into G-strings and enjoying a lap dance or two. Yet here he was, keeping Joel company outside where it was cold and not nearly as entertaining. Which made him wonder, once again, what was up with Ben.

"I noticed you weren't all that into those strippers, either," Joel commented, just to see what kind of reaction he got out of his friend.

The other man shrugged. "I've got a lot on my mind."

Joel grinned. "A woman?"

"Maybe," Ben replied, not giving anything away.

Joel took that as a yes, but didn't press for details, because he of all people knew and understood how a woman could tie a guy up in a dozen different knots. Instead, he laughed, needing a dose of humor to help him get through the next few hours ahead. "What a sorry pair we make, huh?"

A slight smile curved Ben's mouth. "You're in sorrier shape than I am."

Joel grinned, and couldn't argue the truth. "Hopefully not for long."