Daniel and Daughter

CHAPTER ELEVEN

Daniel looked thinner and desperately strained when he arrived at Lee's home. He followed her into the kitchen and held out Phoebe's letter for Lee to read.

Daddy darling,

Please try to understand and not be too angry. I love Mark and we have to be together. So we are going to be married in Gretna Green, like Lee. Don't try to stop us, because we belong together.

Phoebe.

Lee read it, her heart thumping painfully. The words 'going to be married in Gretna Green, like Lee' seemed to stand out accusingly.

'She came home early yesterday evening,' Daniel said. 'The atmosphere between us seemed better than it's been for a long time. She insisted on cooking supper for me. We talked, she was sweet and delightful, it was like old times. I thought I was getting through to her at last-' His voice became husky. Lee reached out a hand to him but he shook his head.

'Actually she was saying goodbye,' he said eventually. 'She had it all planned to run away while I was asleep.' He gave a short, mirthless laugh. 'The condemned man was being given a hearty meal. She even kissed me goodnight. It's a long time since she's done that. And all the time…'

'I can't believe this,' Lee murmured. 'Oh, the silly girl!'

'So much for her taking her career seriously! She's got work lined up. How can she do it if she's living in Scotland, establishing residence?'

'She doesn't have to,' Lee said, trying to pull herself together. 'We thought that, too-Jimmy and I- but he found out you can organise it by post. You have to give fifteen days notice, but you needn't get there until the last minute. Mark could have arranged it from where he's living now.' A sudden thought made her ask sharply, 'When's Phoebe's next booking?'

'Thursday,' he said, growing pale. 'And this is Monday.'

'Then they've fixed it for tomorrow or the day after.'

'I'm going to stop that wedding if it's the last thing I do. And you're coming with me.'

She gasped. 'Oh, no, Daniel, please. I can't go back there.'

'You must,' he said. 'You know the place.'

'But I don't,' she cried desperately. 'I've blotted it all out of my memory.'

'Lee, I need you. It'll all come back to you. It must. I'm racing against time. You could save me vital minutes. Please.'

A thousand painful ghosts seemed to scream a warning at her. 'I can't leave Sonya alone in the house,' she said desperately.

'Then we'll take her with us.'

'She has to go to school.'

'I see what it is,' he said coldly. 'You're afraid, and your fear is more important than anything else, isn't it? More important than Phoebe, than me-'

'No!'

'And you'll go on being afraid to the end of your days because you never had the courage to confront it. All right. Keep your refuge. Hide away in it. Much good it will do you.'

His tone stung her, forcing her to see what she'd always avoided before. There's no safe place in love. And this was Daniel, whom she loved despite everything. His face was ravaged, terrible.

'It's all right,' she said. 'I'm coming with you.'

He regarded her steadily. 'Thank you,' he said at last. 'I'll collect you here in an hour.' He left without another word.

It was arranged that Sonya should stay with Katie, her best friend at school. Lee got on the phone to Katie's mother, then to Gillian to rearrange her schedule for the following week. Luckily she'd left herself a few days free to catch up with paperwork.

'But you really have to be back for Thursday,' Gillian said. 'You're doing a big shoot for Vogue. We've got six models booked and a very tight deadline. If you let them down it'll set you back years.'

'I'll be there,' Lee promised. 'I should know one way or the other by tomorrow.'

Daniel arrived, looking more tense than ever. 'Look what arrived in the post a few minutes ago,' he said, holding out a glossy magazine.

'Woman Of The World,' Lee said, stunned. 'That's Phoebe on the front cover.'

It was the final shot from the wedding session:

Phoebe in the simple gown and veil, looking ravishing.

'The front cover!' Lee breathed.

'Yes, I imagine you're delighted,' Daniel said grimly.

'Of course I am. It's a marvellous start for her. Daniel, don't you see that this proves I was right about her potential, that she was right to follow her dream?'

'In fact, everyone was right except me?' he said bitterly.

'Yes. I think you should admit now that you were wrong.'

'Should I? Then let me remind you that this-' he tapped the picture '-was the first step on the road to Gretna Green and a disastrous marriage to a young man as callow as he's selfish.'

'They're not married yet. We can still prevent it.'

'That would be easier if we knew when it's going to be. I called the register office up there a few minutes ago-I thought I could find out the time of the wedding, but they don't give out that kind of information. It's posted up outside, but that's all.'

'PI,' said Sonya.

The other two stared at her. 'PI,' she repeated. 'Private investigator. Find the Yellow Pages for that area in the library. It'll list the local Pis. Then you call one and he goes down and reads what's written outside the register office. You could know in a couple of hours.'

'Sonya, you're a genius,' Daniel said fervently. 'Where's your local library?'

She gave him directions and he vanished.

'Well done, darling,' Lee said. 'Where would we be without you?' Something impelled her to add, 'Daniel's sister Jean said you get your brains from me.'

Sonya grinned, understanding this perfectly, and went to make a cup of tea. The phone rang and Lee snatched it up. It was Brenda Mulroy.

'Do you know where Phoebe is?' she asked urgently. 'I've called her home but there's no reply.'

'But-surely she's free until Thursday?'

'Yes, but I've heard from the Linnon people. They've decided to offer her the contract to be the face of Linnon.'

'That's marvellous!'

'Isn't it just? But they want another meeting with her, quickly, and I can't find her.'

Lee's brain raced. 'I don't know exactly where she is at this moment,' she declared, with perfect truth.

'A phone number?'

'I think she wanted to use her free days to get away from it all-out of reach of a phone,' Lee said, improvising wildly.

'It's not very professional of her to do that just now.'

'She probably didn't think she was this close to the Linnon contract.'

'Hmm! I hope you marry Phoebe's father soon. You'll be a steadying influence on her. If you hear from her, tell her to call me.' Brenda hung up.

Lee took a few deep breaths to steady her nerves. The shocks of the morning had left her wondering- what next?

After a few minutes Daniel returned. 'I got a little firm ten miles away from Gretna,' he said. 'Someone's going along to check. I've given him the number of my earphone. Let's go. What's the matter?'

'I'll tell you on the way.'

They dropped Sonya off at Katie's house. She hugged them both in farewell, and something fell out of her bag.

'You're a bit old for plasticine, aren't you?' Lee asked as Sonya hurriedly retrieved the object.

'It's for a very serious purpose,' Sonya said, stuffing it back into the bag.

'What serious purpose?'

'I'm going to make an effigy of Mark and stick pins into it.'

'Stick one in for me,' Daniel said grimly.

'Bye, you two,' Sonya said, and waved as they drove off.

When they'd turned the corner Lee let out her breath. In the flurry of departure she'd had little time to realise that she was going to be alone with Daniel.

Neither of them spoke at first. He was following the route she'd taken fourteen years ago, out of London to Birmingham and then Carlisle, but she felt it was too soon to be troubled. She'd driven this way herself several times to do location work. It was only after Birmingham that the past would start to trouble her.

'What were you going to tell me?' he asked as they swung onto the motorway and left London behind.

'Brenda called, looking for Phoebe. The Linnon Corporation have offered her a contract. I told her Phoebe was having a short break, "away from it all"

I hope we find her quickly. If she doesn't call Brenda back soon it'll look bad.'

"What difference does it make? You don't think I'm going to let her accept, do you? It's time this whole business was brought to an end.'

Lee remained silent. It was useless pointing out to Daniel that Phoebe's career was way beyond his control. In his heart he knew it. His words were cries in the dark from a man who hadn't come to terms with the situation. She took out Woman Of The World and studied the cover again, feeling a deep professional satisfaction in having discovered this perfect material and having brought out the best in her.

And there was more inside. Lindsay Elwes had been so stunned by Phoebe that she'd included a short feature about 'the face of the future'. Every word was designed to send Phoebe further up the ladder of success and to break Daniel's heart.

The earphone rang and Daniel snatched it up. He listened, his face dark, and grunted his thanks before he hung up.

'Well?' Lee asked.

'About as bad as it can be. They're the first wedding tomorrow morning.'

'Oh, heavens!'

'I'm running low on petrol. I'll stop at the next service station and fill up.'

At the services they stretched their legs and had coffee. They sat in virtual silence. Lee's heart was heavy as she realised they were like strangers. Once she met his eyes and looked away quickly, but not before she saw him do the same.

When they resumed travelling her memories grew sharper. She couldn't recall the scenery. It was the distances that counted. Fifty miles out of London, then sixty. At this stage she'd been spending the journey twisted around in her seat, anxiously watching the road behind for any sign of her parents' car, until Jimmy had told her to stop being daft.

A hundred miles. They'd stopped for something to eat. She'd brought some money with her, but not as much as Jimmy had expected. He'd been snappy and irritable, which she'd ascribed to nerves. Later she was to learn that Jimmy was always irritable when he didn't get exactly what he wanted.

After their next stop Lee suggested to Daniel that she should take a turn at driving. He agreed, but it wasn't a success. His state of the art, computerised vehicle needed practice. Lee fumbled uneasily and finally settled into the slow lane until the next exit, when she gladly returned it to him.

'Sorry,' she said, cross with herself.

'Don't be. It wasn't your fault. I shouldn't have agreed.'

'You're going to be so tired if you have to do it all yourself.'

'Don't worry about me. We're making good time.'

It was a fatal thing to say. Almost at once the traffic slowed and in a few minutes they'd come to a standstill. Lee groaned at the sight of a jam stretching as far as her eyes could see.

After that they moved at a crawl for the next three hours. Now was another chance to talk. Lee waited, longing for Daniel to begin, but he only switched the radio on. After all, she thought, what was there to say?

At last they could move freely again, but they'd lost precious hours and the light was fading fast. As they went further north the rain started to fall, softly at first but then harder, until they were driving through a downpour.

'We've got to stop somewhere,' Lee said. 'You've driven nearly three hundred miles and you're exhausted. If we keep on through this we're going to have an accident.'

'I want to get there tonight,' Daniel said stubbornly. 'We might find out where they're staying.'

'They may not be in Gretna Green at all,' Lee protested. 'They might go straight to Gretna, which is next door. The register office is there. Let's spend the night in Carlisle. That's what Jimmy and I did. It's only nine miles away, and if we put up at a hotel there we can still get to Gretna before the register office opens. Don't pull out!'

Daniel swore and drew back just in time as a juggernaut thundered past him.

'I didn't see him,' he admitted. 'All right. We'll stay overnight in Carlisle.'

They stopped at the first hotel they came to. It was a small place, slightly shabby but cosy and friendly. While Daniel brought in the bags Lee booked two single rooms. She knew she'd been right to insist on stopping. Daniel's face was grey with strain and weariness.

'I'll call Room Service for a snack and then turn in,' he said.

'I'm afraid this hotel doesn't have Room Service,' Lee told him. 'We'll have to go downstairs.'

'I'll fall asleep over the soup.'

'I won't let you,' she promised. 'Come on.'

They secured the last table in the restaurant and ate without speaking until the main course was over. Once Daniel glanced up, smiled briefly and looked away again.

'I feel more human now,' he admitted. 'I've booked an early call tomorrow, so we'll have time to get there.'

'Daniel, what are you going to do when we meet them?'

'Don't worry, I'm not going to make a scene. I'll just tell Phoebe very calmly that I've come to take her home.'

'And suppose she won't go with you?'

'She'll have to. She's got to see sense about this.'

'But if she won't? What are you going to do? Drag her to the car?'

'It won't come to that.'

'But if it does?'

'Lee, please, don't push me now. I'm not in complete control of my temper.'

And not to be in control was something he hated. Lee gave up the attempt. Tomorrow would bring whatever it brought. She could only hope Daniel showed more wisdom in handling his daughter than he had so far.

As they were getting ready to leave the table a hesitant voice halted them. 'Forgive me, but-you are Daniel Raife, aren't you?'

He raised his head with a look of impatience, which faded as he saw an elderly lady, her hands clutched tightly together. Her face was a mixture of nervousness and determination, as though she'd had to force herself to speak.

'Yes, I am,' Daniel admitted with a tired smile.

'Do forgive me for- That is, I know you must hate people forcing themselves on you-but you're the only person who could help me. I don't know where else to turn.'

Without hesitation Daniel pulled over a free chair and waved the old woman into it with his most delightful smile. Lee, who knew the state he was in, marvelled at the self-control that enabled him to brush his own feelings aside.

'Tell me about it,' he said.

The story came out haltingly. Her name was Mrs Myra Hallam and just over a year ago her husband had been knocked down and killed by a drunk driver. The driver had subsequently been fined two hundred and fifty pounds.

'It was like saying all Freddy was worth was two hundred and fifty pounds,' Mrs Hallam said, in tears. 'If the man had been properly punished-it wouldn't have brought Freddy back, but it would have done him justice. But this-' She buried her face in her hands for a moment, then made an effort to recover herself.

'Now all I want to do is tell people. It happens all the time-drunks who kill people and get off lightly. I never understood before-it's got to be stopped. People have got to be told. And you can tell them. Your show…'

Lee was wrung with pity for her, especially as she knew Daniel had already covered a similar theme recently on the show, and that his producer wouldn't look at it again for a long time. She wondered how he would manage to break the truth to her.

Then she realised that the old lady had gone back to the beginning and was telling the story again. Daniel showed no sign of impatience but sat with his hand enfolding hers, watching her with eyes that were gentle. Even when everything was repeated a third time his perfect kindness and courtesy never failed him.

'Look,' he said at last, bringing a notebook from his pocket, 'give me your phone number. I've already used this subject on the show, and it'll be a while before I can touch it again on television, but I can write about it. I'll call you in a few days and we can have a proper talk then.'

'Oh, thank you. You're so kind.'

'I wish I could do more,' he said.

'But you've helped so much-just listening to me. It's the only thing I can do for Freddy, you see, tell his story.'

Daniel hailed a waiter and ordered three coffees. 'I'll just be a moment,' he said, rising. 'I want to pay the bill so that we can leave early.'

He hurried out to Reception, leaving Lee alone with Mrs Hallam.

'I'm afraid I've rambled on rather," the old lady confided. 'But I can't help brooding about it, especially just now, because next week would have been our wedding anniversary. We would have been married fifty-one years.'

'Oh, no!' Lee exclaimed. 'You mean he died just before, your Golden Wedding?'

'Yes. You know, nobody expected our marriage to be a success-we were so different. But I think that was why it worked so well. Where one was foolish, the other was wise, and so we helped each other.

'It was the night before our Golden Wedding and I had a big surprise planned for him. He kept trying to find out. I told him to go out to the pub and stop trying to peek. I even got a little cross with him because I was afraid the surprise would be spoiled. So he went out that night and-and he didn't come back. He never got to see the surprise at all.'

Lee could only look at her in sympathy, her own eyes filled with tears.

'I'll always regret it,' Mrs Hallam said simply. 'I was so busy worrying about tomorrow that I neglected today. Now I know that today is all we're ever sure of. But it's too late. Perhaps everyone learns that too late.'

In the distance they could see Daniel returning. Mrs Hallam blew her nose and forced herself to speak brightly. 'I was really nervous about approaching him. He seems very pleasant on television, only you wonder what people are like when the cameras are off. But he really is a nice man, isn't he?'

'Yes,' Lee agreed quietly. 'He really is a nice man.'

Lee thought she was sure to fall asleep at once, but despite her tiredness she lay awake for hours that night. Mrs Hallam's words tormented her: 'I was so busy worrying about tomorrow that I neglected today… today is all we're ever sure of…everyone learns that too late.'

She'd refused to commit herself to her love, asking for some kind of guarantee for the future before she did so. But there were no guarantees. There were only risks. But it was love that gave you the courage to take those risks.

She loved Daniel. That was the only certainty. But she'd allowed fear to overcome her, as though fear were more important than love. And because her courage had failed she hadn't been the woman Daniel needed in his hour of crisis.

Brenda had said, 'I hope you marry Phoebe's father soon. You'll be a steadying influence on her.'

Daniel had sometimes blamed her unjustly, but he'd never thrown at her the accusation she now threw at herself: if she'd married him when he'd first asked she could have steered him clear of this disaster. She would have been living with him and Phoebe these last few weeks and then, she was sure, things would never have come to this pass.

He'd begged her to be his wife, out of love but also out of need. Some instinct had told him that she was the woman who could guide him away from the pitfalls. But she'd abandoned him in his need, leaving him to make mistake after mistake, with no one to help him.

Mrs Hallam had known the secret. 'Where one was foolish, the other was wise, and so we helped each other.' It was so simple really.

At last Lee rose, slipped on her dressing gown and went out into the corridor. His room was next to hers. She paused outside his door, her hand uplifted to knock, but after a moment she went in without knocking. She knew he wouldn't be asleep.

He was sitting at the window. He turned as she entered and watched her cautiously, never taking his eyes from her as she approached.

'I came because I had something to tell you,' she said. She stopped. Her heart was beating too fast.

She'd meant to speak the thoughts that had troubled her, perhaps say that she was sorry. But the misery on his face wiped everything else out. What she had to say was far more simple.

'I love you,' she said, and felt his arms go about her in a passion of thankfulness.

For a long time they held each other tightly, in silence. There was nothing more to say. His head found its place against her breast, where she cradled it tenderly. He was hers, for good or ill. He wasn't perfect, but neither was she. And he loved her with a commitment and honesty that Jimmy Meredith would never have understood.

She spared one final, fleeting thought for Jimmy, the malign presence who had almost ruined her life. Then she banished him for ever.

'Come, my love,' she whispered, taking Daniel's hand and leading him to the bed. It was here they would find each other again.

She'd made love to Daniel many times with passion, but tonight her overwhelming emotion was a desire to protect him. She hadn't known before that he needed protecting, but she knew it now, and with every caress, every whispered word, she let him know that she was his, in any way that he needed her.

She, too, sought reassurance in their loving. She wanted to know that after all the bitterness that had passed between them he was still hers, and the promise was given back to her a thousandfold. Once before they'd clung to each other, shocked by their first quarrel. But this wasn't like that time. Then they'd tried to hide from the knowledge of their differences. Now those differences had translated into mutual need, and they were the stronger for it.

They loved each other deeply, intimately. The moonlight coming through the window lit their faces and the smiles of thankfulness that they shared. When at last they nestled against each other he held her tight, as if he would never let her go.

'I know the truth about myself now,' he said sombrely. 'And it isn't pleasant.'

'Daniel-don't.'

'I'm a bully, aren't I?'

'No. It's not like that.'

'I'm a bully and I drove Phoebe away. If she makes a mess of her life it will be my fault. Help me, Lee.'

'Always, darling.'

'Don't go away again where I can't find you.'

'I'll never leave you now.'

'Then perhaps there's hope for me.'

'Go to sleep,' she whispered. 'We have to be up early.'

He was asleep before she'd finished speaking, as though he now had all he needed. His head was heavy against her breast and she stroked his hair lovingly. Whatever tomorrow might bring they had found each other again, and this time she was determined that nothing should drive them apart. Her eyes began to grow heavy as she listened to the soft rhythm of his breathing. Peace. Love. All was well.