Found in Bliss

Chapter Seven

“What’s wrong, sweetie?” Laura asked, opening her arms wide and wrapping them around Holly.

Holly sniffled, well aware that she was now the focus of everyone’s eyes in Trio. Sure the tourists would mostly ignore her, but not the locals. She counted them. Rafe and Cam had taken the adjoining booth, their backs to Laura and Holly. In true male fashion, they left plenty of space between themselves and the crying woman. James Glen sat at the back of the tavern with his girl of the moment. It looked like he’d finally convinced Serena Hall to give him a shot. Serena was a lovely brunette who acted with the rep theater in Creede. Just across the bar, Hope, the secretary at the sheriff’s office, sat with a half-eaten sandwich in front of her, staring longingly at James. Poor thing. At least Holly’s little scene would give Hope something else to think about because James Glen was one man who wasn’t about to be tamed.

“Tell me,” Laura urged. “And tell me fast because I think those men are getting ready to come over here. Wow. Is that Caleb with Alexei? Should we call Nate?”

Holly shook her head. “No. They’re not fighting. It’s worse. They’re negotiating.”

Laura’s head straightened up. “Negotiating? What on earth are they negotiating?”

Holly took a deep breath, sniffling again. “How to share me.”

“Are you serious? That is the most unromantic thing I’ve ever heard.”

Thank god Laura understood. “I know. I walked away for a couple of minutes, and Caleb told Alexei that he just wanted sex, and Alexei was okay with that. But they don’t like my dress. It’s my only good dress. I don’t have another one.”

Laura patted her back. “Oh, sweetie, I’m so sorry. You look beautiful. I think what they don’t like about the dress is the fact that your boobs are hanging out.”

“They are not.”

Laura looked back at Cam and Rafe. “Boys, what do you see when you look at Holly right this second.”

“I see you, bella. Only you,” Rafe said with a smooth smile.

“Boobs. Lots of boobs,” Cam replied at the same time. His face reddened. “And you, babe. Yeah, I was talking about your boobs.”

Laura rolled her eyes. “I can always count on you, Cam.” She winked at them both and then turned back to Holly. “See. They’re not being assholes. They’re being possessive assholes. There’s a huge difference. And you really need to think about this. Caleb Burke, isolated freak, is sitting over there talking to a former mobster about how to make love to you. If you think about it, it’s kind of sweet.”

“Caleb really doesn’t like to talk to people.” What was wrong with her? This was everything she wanted. Sure, it wasn’t exactly how she’d pictured it happening, but they were talking. Why had she walked away? Why hadn’t she just given them both a sexy smile and invited them back to her place?

“You’re scared, honey,” Laura said.

Yep. She was suddenly terrified. “It’s just sex.”

Laura’s head touched hers. “Not for you it isn’t. You need to decide if you can handle this.”

“Caleb just wants sex.” She’d heard him say it. She’d hoped when he’d walked up that he’d come to his senses. She’d walked into the bathroom and reapplied her makeup with a sense of hope. She’d fantasized about sitting in the tavern and having a nice dinner, the three of them together.

Then she’d walked out to Caleb saying he just wanted sex and Alexei agreeing to it. Was that really what she’d wanted?

“Caleb lies to himself a lot, I think,” Laura said. “He says he wants sex, but he never goes after it. That man is so stinking hot he could have had sex with just about anyone he wanted, yet he lives like a monk. Did you know that Lisa Alvarado, the ski instructor at Elk Creek Lodge, came in for three gyno visits this winter? Seriously? Caleb finally had to tell her that her vagina didn’t need more prodding.”

Holly felt her fists clench. Lisa Alvarado was a pretty twenty-five-year-old with a perfect body and a quick wit. Holly had liked her right up until five seconds ago.

Laura continued, every word firing Holly’s jealousy. “And I heard that he gets hit on by ski bunnies all the time. They call him Doc Hottie up at the Lodge. Of course they run the minute he opens his mouth, but let’s face facts—the man is hot.”

“Could we move this conversation along?” Cam asked, poking his head around the booth where he sat with Rafe behind them. His eyes were narrowed with irritation.

“Fine,” Laura said with sarcastic glee. “Let’s talk about how sexy Alexei is.”

Both of Laura’s men groaned and yelled to Zane to bring them a round of beers.

“He is a beautiful man.” She looked back where Alexei had a ferocious look on his face. She’d seen that look on his face before. It was the look he’d had right before the bullets had started to fly on the day he’d saved her life. Whatever he was about to do, he was serious about it.

“He’s gorgeous,” Laura agreed. “He’s the type of man who could have just about any woman he wanted.”

Yes, Alexei had probably had many beautiful women. He was a gorgeous monster. And she hadn’t even seen him without his clothes off. In clothes he was devastating. What would he look like when he stripped down and wore nothing but smooth skin and hard muscle? And Caleb? Caleb was no slouch in the muscle department. Both of the men were beautiful and ridiculously masculine.

What the hell was she doing? She wasn’t in their league.

Laura reached out and touched her hair, commanding her attention. “Calm down. I can feel your anxiety from here, and if Scott Lang was in this bar right now, I would beat him to death with my shoe. Look at me. You’re beautiful. So beautiful. Did you know that Wolf Meyer told me he wanted to ask you out, but he cared too much about Caleb to hurt him that way? That’s three ungodly gorgeous men who want you.”

Both of Laura’s men snorted and started talking about what a douchebag Wolf Meyer was. As Wolf had been dating Laura before they came back, Holly could forgive them.

“Did he really say that?”

“Ask him yourself,” Laura challenged. “Though I wouldn’t ask him when Alexei was around. That man looks scary. And, again, hot.”

Alexei stood, his tall body matched only by Zane’s, who seemed to be struggling with his telephone. Alexei barked something toward Caleb, who got out of his seat, too, and stood beside Alexei, both men staring across the bar toward her.

And then Alexei began walking. There was no doubt where he was heading.

“He’s going to tell me he’s leaving,” Holly said, her heart aching. She’d fucked everything up.

“It has been a really long time since you had sex. Your instincts are way off.” Laura shook her head. “That man is not leaving, but don’t be surprised if he doesn’t bother to wait until you get home. You yell if he gets too rough with you.”

Laura slid out, standing by the bench as Alexei approached. “She’s all yours, buddy. Break her heart and I’ll feed you your balls on a skewer.”

Alexei nodded briefly at Laura who crossed the short space between booths and slid in next to Cam. Alexei turned to Holly. “You will come with me.”

“Alexei, just say what you want to say.” She knew when she was about to get dumped. It was better to just get it over with. It would be a relief. “Just say it and leave, okay.”

Caleb walked up behind Alexei. They both loomed over her. “What did she say?”

“It doesn’t matter. Anything she say now is fear speaking, and I will not listen.” His hand came out and grasped her wrist, pulling her toward him. She was pulled out of the booth, her heels hitting the ground. Like gravity forcing her forward, she landed in Alexei’s arms with a thud.

“Alexei, what are you doing?”

He said nothing, simply leaned over and shoved his right arm under her knees, hauling her up like she weighed nothing at all.

Holly hooked an arm around his thick neck for support and looked over his shoulder at Caleb, who appeared to be following along. “Caleb, what is he doing?”

Alexei walked toward the exit. She looked around the tavern, but no one seemed to be willing to help her out. Rafe and Cam each stood and put an arm around Laura as they smiled at Alexei. Nope. No help there. Zane was still on the phone. Hope looked up, her face open and wide, but she didn’t stand up.

“Alexei, you should put me down.” Everyone was watching her.

Alexei’s face closed. He gave her absolutely nothing. “If you wished to have say, you would not have walked away. You will learn. I love Bliss, but I will not allow the chaos to change my plans for evening.”

“Caleb, talk to him.” She looked over Alexei’s shoulder. Caleb was following behind them.

“I can’t. We talked about this. We decided to form a united front. It’s the only way to survive and thrive, sweetheart.”

“Are you serious?” He looked serious. He looked really serious. Caleb’s face was set in stark lines as Alexei kicked open the door and walked out into the night.

“I’m dead serious. We have to stick together or you’ll make us crazy. I don’t know how this whole thing is going to work, but I do know that the guys need to stick together or the girl will make us crazy.”

Holly felt her mouth open. Was that what they had really been talking about? Had they really been strategizing about how best to handle her? “You said you just want sex.”

Caleb stopped, distance growing between them because Alexei kept walking. She could see Caleb’s face fall and wished she hadn’t asked the question.

“Are you trying to drive him away?” Alexei asked, his voice tight.

“I don’t like the idea that he just wants sex.” It hurt her heart.

“He can’t give anything else now. He needs time. He needs to ease into relationship. You are earning much punishment, dushka.” Alexei’s words were clipped, his walk a staccato rhythm. “I worked hard to get him here and you push away. Ten more.”

Holly felt her eyes go wide. “Ten more what?”

“Punishments. Holly, I am man. I will be indulgent, but can only allow you to push so far. Make decision now. Spanking here or at home. If at home, then you will go and talk to Caleb. You will make him happy and invite him to come with us.”

Caleb stood by the door, looking like a really gorgeous puppy that wasn’t sure if he should follow the pack or stay behind and die. “I’ll talk to him. Are you really going to spank me? Don’t I have a say in that?”

“No. You have no say in punishment. Are you going to tell me you didn’t lie about what happened today? Caleb lied? You didn’t almost die in car accident?”

Crap. She hadn’t told him about that because it didn’t matter. “I’m fine. I didn’t want to bother you.”

Every step they took brought them farther away from Caleb. He stood at the door, watching them. Panic was starting to set in. He wasn’t following them. He was staring, but not following.

“Bother? You bother me. Tell me how you would feel if I almost die and don’t bother to mention it to you? Someone try to shoot at me, but I tell you no problems today. I don’t care enough to worry you. How would that make you feel? People who care don’t treat each other with so little concern.”

Okay. She hadn’t meant it like that. God, why was Caleb standing there? “Please let me go talk to him.”

Alexei stopped and looked down at her. “Why? You didn’t want him. You don’t want me.”

Oh, she’d seriously fucked up. “I want you, Alexei. I’m worried that you don’t want me.”

His face was a block of granite. “You are one who walked away. I change whole life because of you. You can’t question me. Caleb change because of you. He talk to me because he wants you.”

What had she done? How much would Scott cost her? Laura was right. She was allowing her disastrous marriage to affect her current life. “Please, let me down.”

“No. I’m not going to let you go.” His arms tightened around her.

“Please. I won’t go. I’ll take what you give me, but let me get him.” She couldn’t stand the thought of Caleb being left behind. She couldn’t stand it. This was what she’d dreaded. She couldn’t make the choice. She needed them both. She needed two men—both of whom were out of her league. Caleb had stated plainly that he only wanted sex. Alexei was too beautiful to stay. She couldn’t keep Scott, and he didn’t come close to Alexei.

But Scott would never have risked his life to save another human being. He wouldn’t spend his days saving people who couldn’t pay him. Maybe it was time to understand that Scott had nothing on Alexei and Caleb. He didn’t have their heart. He didn’t come close to their souls. Maybe she had to believe that there was more to life than the way a person looked. Maybe she had to take into account the life a person had lived. The choices a person had made.

Caleb had chosen to be a doctor. He’d chosen to help people who couldn’t pay him. Alexei had given up fifteen years of revenge to save a couple of women he hadn’t even known. He’d turned his life around because he couldn’t lose his soul.

What had she done? She’d hidden from life. She’d run from the fight. She’d taken what was given her and never thought to question it. She hid from the good things in life.

“Please let me down.”

Alexei set her on her feet. “Don’t cry, dushka. I will stop. I will be gentle.”

Her heels hit the pavement. She immediately put her hands up, cradling his face. “Please don’t. Alexei, I want you. I want the real you. Spank me. I’ll take it. I want the freaky you who can’t speak English and isn’t sure how to deal with American women. I want that Alexei. And I want Caleb, who’s too much of a dumbass to know he wants more than sex.”

He did. He wouldn’t be standing there with that sad-sack look on his face if he didn’t. He would have walked away. Was her insecurity worth more than their feelings, their affection? Maybe it would fall apart. Maybe they would each find someone else—but tonight they wanted her. What did it make her if she didn’t even try?

A coward.

Tears pricked at her eyes. “I want you, Alexei.”

His whole stance softened, as though her words had power over his physical state. “I want you, Holly. I’ve dreamed of you. I’ve longed for you.”

She couldn’t fucking ask for more than that. What was she doing? She’d asked the question a thousand times since he’d walked back into her life. Why hadn’t she asked herself the question that mattered? Did she want him? God, yes. Was she brave enough to try?

She went on her tiptoes. “Forgive me.”

“Always, dushka. I will always forgive.” His hands threaded through her hair. “You will find me very forgiving.”

She touched her lips to his. “Thank you. I need to talk to Caleb.”

His lips curved up. “Yes. Bring him home.”

She turned, Alexei’s strength uplifting her own. She was through letting Scott and his family win. She was through allowing the past to rob her of her future. She was scared. She was out of her mind scared, but she couldn’t leave Caleb standing there. She couldn’t.

Heels grinding into the gravel, she walked toward him. His face was frozen in a blank stare as though he would accept whatever she offered him. It hurt her heart. She’d probably had that expression a thousand times. Maybe she understood Caleb better than she thought.

She came to a stop in front of him, staring at his gorgeous face. He was male-model beautiful, and he wanted her. Maybe he just wanted her for sex, but it was more than he seemed to want from anyone else. It struck her suddenly that she couldn’t control him. She could only give what she was willing and pray it was enough.

There was something lovely and amazing about that.

She was jumping off a cliff and hoping that he would catch her. If he didn’t, she would fall, but at least she would have tried. She wouldn’t regret the attempt. She would regret never trying.

She held out her hand. “Caleb, please come home with us.”

She used “us” because that was what she wanted. She wanted Caleb and Alexei. She wanted a weird little family. She’d told herself she just wanted Alexei for a hot affair, but she threw that notion to the wind. She wanted him forever. She wanted both of them. She might not get them, but damn, it wouldn’t be because she hadn’t tried.

“I’m not good at relationships.” Caleb’s eyes found the ground beneath his feet.

“I have a divorce under my belt and nothing serious since. I’ve had two lovers my whole life, Caleb, and one of them was a drunken hookup with my high school lab partner. I don’t know anything about this except the fact that I want you. I want Alexei, too. I want you both. I might not be any good at this, but I want to try.”

His eyes softened. “You can’t believe that.”

“I do. Caleb, I haven’t had a relationship with any man since I got divorced, and to tell you the truth, I don’t think I was very good at sex. My own husband didn’t want me.” He’d wanted just about everyone else. Secretaries. Nannies. Hotel maids. Never his own wife for the last three years of their marriage.

He reached out for her hand, his callused fingers sliding against her own. “You’re wrong. You’re so fucking gorgeous, Holly. I want you so bad I ache with it.”

“I want you, too, dushka. I need you.” Alexei was suddenly behind her, his heat sinking into her body. His hands found her hips. “Let us take you home. Let us show you how we feel.”

She leaned back against him, her eyes still on Caleb. “Please, Caleb.”

He moved forward, his body crowding hers. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

Never knowing what it felt like to be between these two men would hurt her. “Caleb, if we don’t even try, I’ll regret it. I want you. It has to be enough for now.”

His mouth was so close. “I’ll try, but I’m damaged, Holly. I’m not whole, and there’s nothing you can do to fix me.”

She would see about that. “Kiss me.”

“I can do that.” Caleb leaned forward, and his lips met hers, gently exploring. His hands moved from his sides and found her hips. His tongue teased out, licking at her lips before she opened and allowed him in.

Strong hands reached from behind and boldly cupped her breasts. Her nipples immediately sprang to life as Alexei’s fingers brushed them. His body pressed against her back while Caleb’s pushed at her front. She was caught in between them, neither giving her an inch of space. She could feel two hard cocks straining. Caleb’s pressed against her belly. Alexei rubbed his along the small of her back. He leaned over and nuzzled her ear, his hot breath causing her to shiver. His tongue played along the shell of her ear, and he murmured low, sexy words in Russian.

“What does that mean?” Holly asked when Caleb finally let her mouth go to explore the skin of her neck, kissing and nipping her flesh.

“Let me translate for our Russian comrade,” Caleb offered. He pulled her hips to his and stared down at her chest. There wasn’t any hesitation left in Caleb’s eyes. Those green eyes were predatory now. He wanted her, and he would have her. She could feel it.

“Please do.” Alexei chuckled. His hands cupped the undersides of her breasts and pushed them up as though offering them to Caleb.

“He says he wants to fuck. He says you’re the sexiest woman he’s ever seen, and he can’t wait to get inside you. He wants to shove his cock deep inside that pussy of yours, and he never wants to leave. He’ll just live there. He won’t want to eat or drink or even breathe. He’ll just fuck you for the rest of his life.”

“He is right, dushka. I take back all thoughts that Caleb would be bad translator. He is very good. Now let me tell you what he is thinking. He is wondering why he waited so long. He’s wanting you from the moment he lay his eyes on you, and he can’t stand the thought of going one more day without being with you.”

“You’re not a bad mind reader, Alexei.” Caleb sank his hand into her hair. “Are you sure you want this? I don’t think I’ll be able to stop if we go much further. Two men can be demanding, Holly. If you want to take this slow, tell us now, and we’ll back off and go at whatever pace you want.”

It was obvious to Holly that Caleb needed a firm hand. “I want it, Caleb. Take me home and make love to me now.”

“Yes, take her home,” a deep voice shouted.

Holly came out of her haze and realized they were standing just outside of Trio. The lights from the tavern spilled out into the twilight, and Nate Wright stood by the door, his big, authoritative presence a reminder to her they weren’t alone. And that her nipples were probably showing.

Maybe Caleb was right about the dress.

Caleb pulled her forward, pressing her chest into his, protecting her from embarrassment. Alexei slipped from behind her and stepped forward. Holly noticed the sheriff wasn’t the only one looking at them. There were at least ten faces pressed against the glass, looking out at the action.

Nosy busybodies. Including her best friend, who gave her a big thumbs-up. She giggled against Caleb’s chest, her embarrassment rushing away. They would gossip in Bliss. The whole town ran on it, but they would be happy for her, too. No one would look down on her. They would cheer her on.

“Do I need to give you a ticket?” Nate’s head turned, and his eyes narrowed. Cam stood beside him. “Damn it, Briggs, are you a deputy or not? You were just going to let them go at it in the middle of Main Street? Don’t you know how these things go around here? If you let this threesome get away with it, Max and Rye are going to start jumping Rachel in public just to prove they can. It’ll be a free-for-all.”

Cameron Briggs grinned. “Sorry, Sheriff. What can I say? I believe in the power of love between one woman and her chosen men. Besides, I thought if we gave Doc there time to think, he’d talk himself out of it.”

“No,” Caleb said. He loosened his hold and then leaned over, scooping her into his arms.

Holly smiled because she knew that “no” meant “yes” to her. She wrapped her arms around his neck. There was no way to mistake the warm satisfaction on Alexei’s face as he looked at them.

“Hey,” Nate said. “You can’t just say no to a ticket.”

“No.” Caleb proved he could.

“Go. Take her back to car. I’ll deal with sheriff.” Alexei winked at her. “Try to wait for me.”

“No.” Caleb had started walking toward her little car. He shouted the word over his back toward Alexei, but there was a smile on his face as he said it.

“Hurry!” Holly called out. Alexei’s big body got smaller as Caleb walked further away.

When they got to her car, he set her on her feet and held out his hand for the keys.

“It’s okay. I can drive.”

“No.”

She sighed. “Caleb, you can’t tell me no all night.”

He pulled her close. Now that he’d touched her, he seemed to want to be really close. His face rubbed against her hair. She reveled in his affection. She’d expected that Alexei might be deeply sensual, but Caleb’s obvious need for contact softened her heart. She brought her hands up to his waist.

“I won’t tell you no all night. But we’re going to have a talk about this dress. I can see your nipples. It makes me want to tear off what little material there is and get those breasts in my mouth. I will say no to this dress, Holly.”

His voice was thick and rich, like molasses, clouding her senses. Even the way he told her what to wear seemed sexy. “Caleb, I can’t let you dictate to me.”

“Really? Then you won’t care if I run around without a shirt on or if I choose to join the Naked Man March. I hear the women of the town are going to set up lawn chairs and cheer the biggest penis.”

“No.” She gave him back his favorite word. She really didn’t want him to do that. Once a year, the men of the Mountain and Valley Naturist Community marched through town on their way to the Wild Man Retreat that was supposed to bring them back to their masculine selves, apparently by showing off their junk. The sheriff had tried to arrest a few of them last year but rapidly discovered a distaste for dealing with that many penises. Nate Wright took that day off to go fishing.

“See, we can compromise.” He kissed her again, making her forget her argument.

Alexei jogged up behind them. “Let’s us to go. I got us out of ticket, but we need to take her home.”

Yes. It was time to go home. It was time to be with her men.

Vince took a slow sip of beer and tried to disappear into the background. He slumped down trying to disguise his height. He was a tall man. People tended to remember his height. In New York no one noticed his Italian dark looks. He blended. It was hard to do here. Everyone knew everyone else in this weird little town. And they seemed to have the strangest relationships. It was very difficult to figure out who was with whom.

And his target seemed to like to draw a fucking crowd. And to switch cars.

His first attempt had failed. It gnawed at him. The truck was perfect. Even if the yokels had figured out someone had cut the brake line, allowing the fluid to slowly drain, no one would ever think it was the sunny tourist who smiled but didn’t talk much. He was just another granola-loving hiker.

But his target was still walking and talking and apparently about to have three-way love. That was unexpected. He’d counted on a lover, but certainly not two. They had to separate at some time. And now the threesome seemed to be down to one car. Maybe he could try again.

A big guy with scars marring his face stood over the booth Vince occupied. He’d been tending bar when Vince had come in. There was a waitress walking around. She seemed like a little mouse of a woman, young and pretty, but nothing impressive. She hadn’t studied him the way this big guy did.

“Get you another beer?” the big guy asked.

If Vince had to guess, this guy had experience. There was something about the eyes and the way he held his own. Cop. The big dude had been a cop once. Vince put on his best “man of the people” smile.

“Sure. I’m on vacation after all.” He opened his face, allowing his eyes to go wide. “This is a great little town you have here. I’m staying in Pagosa Springs, but they told me there was some great hiking out this way. And the sand dunes are incredible.”

He’d picked up a bunch of pamphlets touting local attractions at the motel in Creede. He’d learned the lay of the land. Locals, he’d discovered, usually got bored talking to tourists. A couple of minutes of gabbing about how pretty everything was and their eyes glazed over, any suspicion giving way to the need to get on with their lives.

“Yes, they’re beautiful. And there are a lot of romantic places around here. I’m sure your wife probably loves it.”

Yep. He would rather have dealt with the waitress. The big guy was probing. It was time to start lying. “Girlfriend. She was a little tired today. She stayed back in the motel. I had to get out a bit.”

“Long drive from Pagosa. Guess you heard about how good the beer is. I’ll get you another.” The big guy turned, but not before giving him another long look.

Fucker. This was supposed to be a simple job. Now some fucking ex-cop had stared at him long enough that he could probably draw his face from memory. He thought about leaving before the guy could get back, but that would look even more suspicious. He was stuck.

And now the sheriff was here. Awesome. And he wasn’t some round-ass rural jerk who couldn’t get his head out of his anus. He looked lean and sharp. And he was talking to the big guy.

Damn it.

His cell phone vibrated, signaling he’d received a text. Yeah. That was what he needed. This job was rapidly devolving into a clusterfuck that wasn’t worth his money or time.

The target is still moving.

No fuck the target was still moving.

He was ready to leave. There would be another job. He typed back as he prepared to get the hell out of Bliss. He’d head back to New York where no one bothered to look at the people around them. He could fade back into blissful anonymity.

Sending back the down payment. Job not worth it.

The ping back was almost immediate.

500,000 more.

Someone really wanted the target dead. Damn it. He couldn’t turn it down. His fingers hovered over the keys.

Done. Second attempt tomorrow.

He nearly cringed as the big guy walked back with a beer in his hand. He didn’t like to drink on the job, and there was no question that he was on the job. It would be his single biggest payday to date. He couldn’t walk away. He just needed a few days to learn the target’s habits. He’d hoped for an easy job, but it was more complicated than he’d imagined. It didn’t help that the target had two people close all the time. He might have to take out all three of them. It would cause more scrutiny than he would like, but he could leave the country for a while.

“Thanks. Everyone’s so friendly around here.”

The big guy smiled, but it was a feral thing, a showing of teeth. “Yeah, we are.” He looked down at the smart phone in Vince’s hands. “Don’t rely on that too much. Cell service here has been spotty for months. You’re lucky you can get a text. It looks important. I’ll let you get back to it.”

He turned and walked away. Vince drank his beer and plotted his next move.