Hard to Handle

Chapter 11

Aiden’s rambunctious nephew Lionel, Lyon for short—how cute was that?—tackled Aiden to the ground and roared in triumph. The kid had energy like he’d eaten a bag of Pixy Stix for lunch rather than the half a turkey sandwich and apple slices Aiden had brought for him.

Lyon may have his late mother’s mocha skin and dark hair, but the unique blue-green color of his eyes resembled his uncle’s. Man, he was gonna be a heartbreaker when he grew up. Aiden rolled out from under Lyon and waved his nephew farther out before he threw the ball. Sadie admired Aiden’s strong legs, the sprinkling of fair hair, and the way the cutoff gray sweats cupped his butt.

In spite of the cool air, Sadie fanned herself.

“Sadie!” Lyon hollered, bounding over to her and interrupting her R-rated, heading for NC-17, thoughts. She replaced them with Disney-like dancing bears.

“Yes, sir,” she said, “What can I do for you?”

“Catch!” She didn’t think Lyon ever uttered a phrase that didn’t end in exclamation points.

“You bet,” Sadie held out a hand and caught Lyon’s throw smoothly. She lined up her fingers and drew back to throw, feeling Aiden watch her, an eyebrow cocked curiously.

“You don’t look like you need help with that pigskin,” he said, lifting his hands to catch a pass.

Sadie pulled her arm back and tossed the ball, watching the impressive spiral slice through the air. Aiden had to back up a few steps and lift his arms over his head to catch it. His shirt to rode up, flashing a stomach abbreviated by a damn sexy belly button. God bless her twenty-twenty vision. She would have hated to miss that sight for a pair of imperfect peepers.

“She’s awesome!” Lyon hollered, throwing himself to the ground again.

Aiden jogged over to where she stood. “Yeah, I know.” His eyes flickered to her mouth and her lips tingled. “Where’d you learn to throw like that?”

She shrugged a shoulder. “Oh, you know…”

Lyon tugged on Aiden’s shirt, breaking their intense eye contact. “I’m throwing it,” Lyon instructed, pointing at the ball. “You tackle Sadie, Uncle A.”

“It’s not nice for boys to tackle girls,” Aiden said, casting Sadie a sideways glance.

“I don’t know about that,” she said. That got his full attention.

Lyon ran back, ball in hand and turned. Aiden bent, hands on his knees, and Sadie narrowed her eyes at him and prepared to catch it before he did. Lyon’s throw was short. The football hit the ground, wobbling in three directions at once.

Sadie reached the ball first, but as her hand grazed one pointed tip, Aiden lashed an arm around her waist and fell to the ground, bracing her fall with his body. The air whooshed from her lungs, and Sadie laughed. Before she knew how, Aiden had rolled her onto her back in the grass and straddled her.

Her laughter ebbed into a soft hmm.

“Gotcha,” Aiden said.

She’d say.

Aiden lowered his head, taking her waiting lips in his. Sadie went loose beneath him, darting her tongue out and tasting the Coca-Cola lingering on his lips. He pulled away from her, something intense dancing in his eyes.

“Sadie,” he murmured. “I—”

“What are you doing?” Lyon interrupted.

Aiden rolled to one side, leaving Sadie like a tree split by lightning. Sadie sat up and brushed grass from her hair and skirt.

“I, uh, was tackling her like you told me to,” Aiden said. He stood and offered Sadie his hand. She took it, loving the buzz of electricity that shot up her arm on contact.

“Looks like kissing to me,” Lyon grumbled, clearly unimpressed.

“How do you know what kissing looks like?” Aiden asked, winking at Sadie.

“Daddy kisses our neighbor sometimes,” Lyon said with a shrug.

Aiden made a funny face and Sadie cracked up, holding her stomach as she laughed. She couldn’t remember a time she’d felt lighter.

She wanted the feeling to last as long as possible.

They walked the short distance from the park to Axle’s, Lyon insisting on walking between them, his hands in theirs. Aiden cradled the football and Sadie carried the food bag, and every once in a while, Aiden would look over Lyon’s head and smile at her.

She wondered if she would have moments like this with her own niece or nephew when Celeste had the baby, or if the gaping distance between them would only widen.

In the parking lot, Aiden crossed to a car and a man got out. He was Aiden’s height and build, with longish mostly gray hair and a scar on the side of his face. Lyon let go of Sadie’s and Aiden’s hands and yelled, “Grampa!” The man embraced Lyon, a proud grin on his rugged face.

“I’m going to go in.” Sadie gestured toward the store.

“Not yet.” Aiden clasped her hand and tipped his head in his father’s direction. She tensed as they approached and Aiden must have noticed. He squeezed her hand and pulled her close. “Dad.”

Sadie couldn’t tell if the older man was happy about his son holding her hand or not.

“This is my dad, Mike.” Aiden nodded at his dad. “This is Sadie.”

Mike’s face split into a smile, and the scar on his face pinched beneath his sunglasses.

Sadie tried not to stare. “Nice to meet you.”

“Never thought I’d meet you,” Mike said with a sideways smile reminding her of Aiden’s.

“He means he’s glad to finally meet you.” Aiden shot his dad a warning look.

“Yeah. Was sorry to miss Shane’s wedding. Couldn’t make it down.” He pointed to his face. “Freak muffin tin accident.”

“Dad,” Aiden mumbled.

“I kid.” Mike’s mouth curved. “It was a pizza cutter.” Sadie allowed herself a laugh. Clearly that was Mike’s goal. Before Aiden could reprimand him again, he said, “I hear it was a nice wedding.”

“Very,” she agreed, feeling guilty all over again for the way she’d ignored Aiden. A fresh wave of embarrassment crashed over her when she recalled how much she’d drunk, how she’d asked Aiden to undress her. He’d not only undressed her, but redressed her and tucked her in. How could she have been so mean after all he’d done for her?

“You’re as beautiful as he said.” At Aiden’s penetrating stare, Mike only shrugged. “Just tellin’ the truth, son.”

Four hours later, Sadie was sorting through the final box in the warehouse when she caught a glimpse of Goliath out of the corner of her eye. She tipped her head and smiled at the mountain before her. “Hi, Axle.”

“Window looks good,” he said.

“Thank you.” While digging in the warehouse, she’d found the mannequin’s missing arm and a female mannequin wedged in a corner behind some old signage. Sadie arranged the now fully limbed male and his new mate next to the custom Harley, placed a map on the seat, and drew a path with red marker. She accessorized with matching helmets and a stack of Midwest parts recommended for long-distance travel.

She wasn’t sure if the burst of inspiration had come from finding the discarded mannequin, or the fact that hanging around Aiden reminded her how much better everything was with a partner. Either way, the display finally felt right. Complete.

“Well,” Axle said. “Bye.”

With that, Axle Zoller, man of few words, made his exit. Sadie followed him as far as the store when Aiden stopped her in the hallway. Something in his eyes warned her he meant business. “Can I talk to you for a second?”

“Um…no?” She smiled hopefully.

He tipped his head in silent reprimand and turned, walking into Axle’s office at the end of the hall. Never one to chicken out, Sadie followed. Even though she was pretty sure this so-called talk had nothing to do with work. She entered the office and found Aiden fidgeting with a stress ball he’d found on Axle’s desk.

“Shut the door for me?”

Panic pinged around her stomach like ricocheting BBs. She thought back to the park as she closed the door with a click. There’d been a moment, a tangible, meaningful moment when Aiden had looked into her eyes and started to say something. Something that started with I. She could only hope he wasn’t planning on finishing the phrase with you and sliding a four-letter word in between.

I love you in any form was frightening, but an I love you from Aiden would be terrifying. Admitting her feelings when she wasn’t sure what they were would make her more vulnerable to him than ever.

“Lyon’s adorable,” Sadie said to fill the void in the room.

“Yeah, he is a very cool kid.” Aiden looked proud for a second, then his smile dropped. “About last night. I thought…maybe I should try to explain.”

Oh no. Worse than the park thing. What did he regret? Staying? That she’d eyed him the way a hungry lioness would meat on a hook?

Aiden licked his lips and opened his mouth to speak. Sadie interrupted before he could.

“I know I was aggressive,” she said. “I shouldn’t have…” Shouldn’t have what? She’d kissed him, unsnapped his jeans, asked him to stay. “Been so needy.” She realized that was an apt description.

“No. No, that’s not—”

“I just felt so sure, you know? I mean, I wanted it. I really wanted it.”

Aiden gave her an anguished look.

Nervously, she continued. “It was the first time I’d ever—” Oops. Back up. She hadn’t meant to go there. “I think I was overly excited.”

“Sadie, I—”

“But propositioning you was wrong. Especially when you weren’t interested in”—she gestured at his crotch with a wave of her hand—“you know. I can understand if you don’t want to—”

“Sadie,” he interrupted again, this time sternly. His expression softened, his eyebrows rising. “Please let me speak.”

Well. She’d tried to head him off. She nodded her reluctant agreement.

Aiden ran a hand through his hair, looking none too happy about whatever he was about to tell her, which made Sadie more nervous. Maybe he’d decided he didn’t want to see her any longer. What if he’d had a change of heart since the park?

“I want to.” Aiden pinned her with a deadly serious look. “Trust me. Where you’re concerned, there isn’t much I don’t want to do with you.”

Sadie’s heart beat double time. She reached for her earring, spinning the stud in her ear and trying not to faint. That…might have been the best news she’d heard today.

“But…”

Or not.

“…I promised myself…ah, I sort made a decision.” Aiden dropped the stress ball on the desk and pointed an accusing finger at it. “That thing doesn’t work.” He sent her a sickly smile before sitting on the edge of Axle’s desk and closing his eyes. “I made a decision,” he said, his voice dipping an octave. “That the next time I make love to a woman, she will be the last one.” He opened his eyes. “The last one ever,” he clarified.

Sadie felt her brows lift. “Like…”

“She’ll be my wife,” he said.

“Oh.”

“That probably sounds stupid, doesn’t it?” Aiden stood and paced the short distance from desk to door in Axle’s office. “I went through a lot of crap over the last year. And I thought maybe I’d try to do everything right instead of”—he threw a hand into the air—“effing it all up. I just…kind of wanted to start over.” He winced.

Sadie was going to cry. Or laugh. Or laugh until she cried. “You’re a…a born-again virgin?”

Aiden palmed his neck, looking uncomfortable with the label. Uncomfortable about everything. “Yeah, I guess.”

Sadie laughed, a short, high bark she staunched by clapping a hand over her mouth.

Aiden’s face pinched. “Thanks a lot.”

“No,” She touched his arm, which was as rigid as a steel pipe. “I’m not laughing at you.” But that didn’t stop her from giggling.

Her life was pathetically funny.

“Right.” Aiden turned the doorknob. “Sorry I brought it up.”

When he would have made his escape, Sadie said, “It’s just ironic.” He paused, turned his head. She swallowed and forced herself to continue. “That you aren’t ready. And I am. Finally,” she added quietly.

He narrowed his eyes as if trying to figure her out. Great. Just what she needed, Aiden seeing through her like a recently Windexed windshield. “What do you mean ‘finally’?”

She gulped. “I—nothing. I don’t even know why I said that.”

He released the doorknob and walked over to her. “You mean you wanted to sleep with me at the wedding, but you are finally allowing yourself to admit it?” he asked, arriving at a very wrong conclusion.

“That’s not what I meant by f-finally,” she stammered, lifting her long hair off her neck. “It’s hot in here.”

“Then what did you mean?”

Sadie let go of her hair and flipped it over her shoulder. “Just that I’m ready”—just say it and get it over with—“to have sex.”

“With me,” Aiden said, a smile tickling his lips.

“With anyone!” she said a little too loudly. She picked up a manila folder and fanned her face. Wasn’t she too young for hot flashes?

”Anyone at all, huh?” But Aiden didn’t look offended. He looked amused. The bastard. She fanned harder. She could tell by Aiden’s expression that he thought she was busting his balls, keeping his ego in check.

Sadie so wanted to stop having this conversation. And leave Axle’s sweltering office.

“You don’t have to spare my feelings.” Aiden took the folder from her and leaned in. “I get it,” he said, his voice low. “You’re a sexual person.”

“Shh!”

“You have needs.” His lip curved. “And here I am, unwilling to be your boy toy.”

“Dammit, Aiden,” Sadie snatched the folder and slammed it on the desk. Go big or go home, right? “That’s not what I meant.”

Her stern expression knocked the smile of his smug face. Aiden’s lips flattened. “What do you mean, Sadie?”

With a Band-Aid-esque tear, she told him the painful truth. “I meant I’m finally ready to sleep with someone for the first time. Ever. In my entire life,” she reiterated to be crystal clear. “And I was hoping that someone would be you.”

* * *

Aiden had tried to speak once, twice, but only managed to emit a thin wheeze. He felt as if his throat had been lined with cotton batting, his tongue barricaded by bags of sand.

Was she saying…?

No way.

Sadie moved for the door and Aiden pressed a hand to the panel. “Not even Trey?” he rasped.

Sadie crossed her arms over her chest and met his eye. “No.”

Thank God. He didn’t like the thought of her having sex with that philandering douchebag. Aiden didn’t like the idea of her having sex with anyone. And she hadn’t. Apparently.

“It’s not that big of a surprise.” Sadie looked at him through the veil of her lashes. Hiding.

“Wanna bet?” he choked out. He was beyond surprised. He was shocked. Although…when he’d helped her out of her dress at the wedding, Sadie had shown her modesty.

No peeking while I crawl into bed.

But how could she be a virgin? Sadie was completely irresistible. He would know. Every time he found himself alone with her, he was tempted to tie his hands to his sides to keep from touching her. She turned him on wearing high heels or tennis shoes, hair up or down, wielding a silly-saying key chain or a set of sparkplugs. How had she endured the many men who must have—had to have—tried and tried and tried again to get her to change her mind?

“I’m just tired of missing out.”

“That’s what this is about?” Aiden asked, disappointed. “Experimental?”

Sadie shrugged. “What else?”

How about because she was precious? Because she was loved? Because she was worth waiting for?

“This is exactly why I didn’t tell you!” Sadie dropped her arms against her legs with a slap. “You’re looking at me like I’m some rare, legendary creature.”

You are, he thought but was smart enough not to say.

“It’s not a big deal,” Sadie insisted.

Maybe the best thing to do here was downplay his shock. “I know.”

Some of the steam went out of Sadie’s voice. “Oh. Well. Good,” She leaned on the door, hands behind her back. “I guess I just think it’s silly to save it. To wait.”

Aiden wasn’t sure which of them she was trying to convince at this point. He reached up and brushed her cheek with the back of his hand. God, she was beautiful. Everything he ever wanted—could ever want.

She stared at her shoes. “It’s just sex.”

He tilted her face and pressed his lips to hers for a slow, soft kiss that drew an answering moan from the back of her throat.

Cradling her face in his hands, Aiden bent to meet her eyes. “Not with me, it wouldn’t be.”

* * *

Aiden hung his motorcycle keys on the metal hooks that spelled KEYS hanging beside the back door. “Hey, Pop,” he called, alerting his possibly snoozing father that he was home.

Instead of hearing a rattling snore followed by the sound of the recliner returning to its upright position, his father hollered back, “In here!”

“Uncle A!” Lyon burst through the kitchen before Aiden could make his way into the den.

“Hey, buddy, what are you still doing here?” Aiden said. Evan usually didn’t stay this late, especially since Aiden had moved in. Evan avoided him as much as possible. It’s why Aiden had asked to have lunch with Lyon. Otherwise, he might never see him.

“Me and Dad are staying the night,” Lyon said, running off again. “I have new jammies! Wanna see?” He took off for the staircase without waiting for Aiden’s answer.

Aiden walked into the den. Evan sat on the couch looking none too glad to see him. Of course, Evan never looked happy to see him.

“Hey, brother,” Aiden said.

“My son said you were kissing a girl in the park.”

And this chafed Evan for some reason?

“Sadie somebody, Dad says.”

Aiden shot his father a look. Mike shrugged. “Didn’t know it was a state secret.”

“K-I-S-S-I-N—”

“And Lyon says you make out with the neighbor.” Aiden interrupted Evan’s chants. “So why don’t you lay off?”

Dad rolled his eyes. “You two sound like a couple of idgits.”

“Evan started it.”

“You started it,” Evan barked. “When you refused to bring Mom back from Oregon. When you lied to Dad about how much of your own money you were putting up to keep her there.”

“Enough!” Mike’s booming voice garnered both sons’ full attention. “We are not going to assign blame for your mother’s sickness.”

“Death, Dad,” Evan corrected.

Aiden scowled at him. Mike’s eyes sank closed at the word.

“You’re right, Ev,” Dad admitted softly. “Death.”

The room grew eerily quiet for a moment. Until Lyon burst back onto the scene. “Jammies!” He was wearing only his underwear and waving the pieces of clothing around his head like a helicopter.

Aiden caught a pant leg before he lost an eye, and helped his nephew dress. Lyon chattered about a superhero movie, growing more animated when he described the “’splosions and battles”.

When he was dressed for bed, Lyon clambered away from his uncle. The kid’s darker skin and mass of coffee-colored curls were his late mother’s, but his light eyes and build were his father’s. “I’m gonna get the football!”

“Not now, Lyon,” Evan told his son. When Lyon whined, Evan gave him his sternest dad look. “I’m talking to Grampa and Uncle Aiden. Go watch your DVD and I’ll tuck you into bed in a few.”

“A few what?” Lyon asked with a frown.

“Child,” Evan said, lifting an arm to point. “Go.” Lyon groaned and lurched into the kitchen. Eventually they heard him stomping up the stairs, followed by the rumble of the television.

Mike slapped Evan’s knee. “You’re a good dad.”

The hurt showed through Evan’s pride. Lyon, and any reminder that Evan was a father, reminded Evan of Rae. When she died two years ago, she left Ev with a three-year-old and a hole in his heart the size of the Grand Canyon. Aiden couldn’t imagine what his brother’s life must be like in the lonely, quiet hours at night.

“I love that kid,” Aiden told him.

“He’s his mother,” he said.

“He’s you, too.” their father said. Then he stood. “Beer?”

“Yeah,” Ev said, then cast a glance at Aiden. “And bring Aid one, too.”

Aiden figured that was as close to a reconciliation as they were going to get today.

He’d take it.