Hidden Jewel

14

Great-Grandpère's Debt Must Be Paid

Buster Trahaw's pirogue was so old and rotten that I was afraid it would simply come apart and dump us into the swamp water, which became the color of dark tea as we left the dock. Buster groaned and grunted as he pushed down on his pole. Soon beads of sweat as big as small marbles were breaking out over his forehead and rolling over his rough skin to drip off his chin and jawbone.

"How far do we have to go?" I asked nervously. Pieces of sun-dried bait and worms littered the canoe floor, as did cigarette butts, empty beer bottles, and crushed tin cans.

"Not far, not far," he said quickly.

Instinctively I looked back toward the dock. I had a strong urge to ask him to return me there, but I couldn't help being afraid he was telling the truth and Mommy really needed me. I would have felt so much safer and reassured if I had seen Jack before I left. Who knew how long it would be before he found my note, and what if he didn't find it? I shouldn't have run off like that, I told myself.

"Don't worry," Buster said, still smiling. "We gonna be there soon. No one poles a pirogue faster than Buster Trahaw in these here canals."

I sat back. I really couldn't recall being in a pirogue when I was just a little girl, but certain visual memories returned when I saw things that were once familiar. Off to my right, among the lily pads and cattails, bream were feeding on the insects that circled just above the water. It looked like bubbles popping. Sheets of Spanish moss draped over cypress branches rose and fell with the breeze. Dragonflies hovered inches above the canal until something triggered them to veer right or left and hover over another area. They moved like dots merging into one large fly.

Buster turned the pirogue a bit to the left, and we entered a narrower canal, passing first under a canopy of willow branches. When I looked back, it was as if a green door had been slammed closed behind us. As we continued into the canal, the overgrowth became thicker. At times the canopy of cypress over the water was so dense it nearly blocked out the sun. I saw an alligator sleeping under a fallen, rotting tree trunk and then another floated past us, its eyes glaring with suspicion or anticipation.

Buster laughed when I cringed. "Ain't nothin' to worry 'bout," he said. "I wrestle gators for fun." He followed that with a cackle that echoed in the bush. "You're a fancy lady now, ain'tcha? Betcha don't even remember livin' here, huh?"

"No. But I'm not a fancy lady," I replied. "Just where is this place?"

"Yonder, 'round the bend." He jerked his head to the left.

I shaded my eyes and gazed in that direction. Flowering honeysuckle covered the far bank. Two snowy egrets paraded on a rock while bullfrogs leaped around them, but I saw no shack and no other human beings.

The stillness got to me. Except for the sound of a dove or the cry of a marsh hawk, all I heard was Buster's grunt and the rhythmic dipping of his pole. Along a nearby bank, I saw a couple of nutrias dash into their dried domes of grass and then a white-tailed deer lifted its head, gazed our way, and turned to trot off. It was as if everything in nature knew to be wary of Buster Trahaw.

"What do you do?" I asked him. He had made little or no effort to start a conversation and had really volunteered nothing about himself.

"Whatcha mean, do?"

"Are you an oyster fisherman or a carpenter?"

"I ain't a lawyer," he said and laughed. "I fish some. I hunt some. I sell Spanish moss to the furniture people to stuff them chairs and sofas, and I do odd jobs when I got to," he said. "My daddy left me a little money, too. 'Course, most of its gone down the gullet," he added and cackled again, his Adam's apple bouncing against his sandpaper skin.

As we made the turn around the bend, Buster poled as hard as someone being chased.

"How did my mother get out here?" I asked suspiciously.

"She come from the other end," he said quickly. "What other end?" I asked.

"Stop asking so many questions," he snapped. "I can't pole this pirogue and talk at the same time."

I felt my heart begin to thump. I spun around and gazed back. Cypress Woods was miles behind us. We entered another, even narrower canal. At times I could almost stretch out my arms and touch both sides. The mosquitoes looked bigger, and the clouds of them were thicker. The water was darker, too. Something slithered off a rock and slipped into the water just ahead of us. I cringed again.

"I don't like this," I said. "We're not getting anywhere. Take me back. I'll get someone to drive me to the other end," I said, but Buster didn't look at me, nor did he slow down. "Mr. Trahaw, I said . . ."

He turned and looked behind him.

"There it is," he announced as we broke out of the narrow canal and into a pond.

I saw a trapper's shack ahead. It sat about six feet off the marsh on pilings lined up in rows. The planks appeared to have been slapped together with chewing gum. Some dangled precariously over the windows. The railing of the gallery was cracked on the far end, and even from this distance I could see there were gaping holes in the floor. How could my mother ever go to such a place?

"My mother wouldn't be there," I declared.

"Why not? You know whose place that was?" he said with his lips in a tight smile. "That there was your great-grandpère's shack, missy. That's where the likes of you come from, so don't sit up so high and mighty, hear?"

"My great-grandpère's?"

"That's right. Jack Landry. He was a trapper and the best hunting guide in these parts. 'Course, now I am," he added. He poled faster, and I strained to see signs of Mommy.

"Where is she?"

"Lying on the cot inside, sick as a dog, I told ya. Happy you come now?"

I didn't reply. Cautiously I sat back and waited for him to reach the dock and tie up the pirogue. There was a very shaky stairway up to the gallery. He planted his foot against one step and reached for me.

"Come on. help you up," he said. I stood up slowly, but the pirogue rocked and I nearly fell overboard. I cried out, and he laughed. "Reach out," he demanded. Reluctantly, I did so, and the moment his hand found mine, he pulled me forward with such force that I lost my footing and fell into his huge arms. He laughed again, held me there a moment and then lifted me out of the pirogue as if I weighed no more than a baby. I found as firm a footing as I could on the stairway and walked up to the gallery. He followed close behind.

Scattered over the gallery in a disorganized fashion were nets for oyster fishing, piles of Spanish moss, empty beer bottles, dirty bowls crusted with dried gumbo, and the only piece of furniture, a rocking chair tipped over on its side, the right arm snapped off. I paused. The planks dipped. I was sure I would step through one.

"It's all right. Go on inside," he said, waving toward the door. I walked forward slowly and entered what he said was once my great-grandpère's shack.

It was only one room. There was a plank table directly in front of us, covered with old dishes and empty beer and whiskey bottles. To the right was a cot, the stained gray blanket dumped beside it, the sheet brown stained and torn. Skins and furs dangled of nails along the walls. On a long shelf near the table were jars of pickled frogs, snakes, and the ugliest water insects I had ever seen. Everywhere I looked, I saw strewn clothing and sacks. The two windows were both caked with grime so thick the light was practically kept out.

"Where's my mother?" I asked.

"Well, I'll be," Buster said. "Looks like she just up and left and didn't clean up after herself neither." He laughed, and I turned when I heard something rattle. He was standing in the doorway behind me, a long metal chain in his hand.

"I want to go back immediately," I demanded.

"Well, that ain't very friendly, now, is it? And after all I done for your mother?" He laughed again.

"Right now," I said and started toward the door. He laughed again and wrapped his arms around me, lifting me up and carrying me to the cot while I screamed. He slapped me down hard, wrapped the chain around my right ankle, and snapped a padlock before I had a chance to resist.

"And the key's right here," he said, showing it to me before putting it in his right pants pocket. When I sat up to protest, he lifted his enormous right palm and threatened to slap me down. I took one look at the callused dirty fingers and that thick wrist and recoiled.

"What are you doing?" I cried.

"Getting what's coming to me," he said and backed away holding the other end of the chain. He ran it to a big metal pin that looked like a railroad spike embedded in a floor beam and locked that end with a padlock, too.

"What's coming to you?" I asked, terrified.

"A wife, that's what. I paid for a Landry some years back, and she run off. Then, when she returned and I went to claim what was legally mine, she had me arrested. I spent some time in the clink 'cause of her, but Buster Trahaw never forgets a debt owed him. No, ma'am. Relatives of mine," he continued, reaching for a bottle that had an inch or so of beer left in it, "told me you was here, so I come lookin', and sure enough, there you was. Well, I ain't particular which Landry I get, long as I get one that's been owed." He brought the neck of the bottle to his thick lips and sucked out the remaining beer, his throat contorting like the body of a snake. Then he flung the bottle across the room. It didn't shatter, but it bounced off the wall and fell to the floor.

"I figured since I was cheated, I could claim this shack, but it ain't nothin' near the payment owed me." He smiled. "You make up the rest."

"What do you want from me?"

"Want?" He looked confused for a moment. "Why, I want a wife. You do what a wife supposed to do is what I want. First thing, you clean up this place. I give you enough lead on this chain so you can get around the shack. Right there," he said pointing to a rusty pot in the right corner, "is the diddly. You can use them old newspapers I got piled next to it."

"You can't do this," I cried. "This is kidnapping." "Course I can do it. It's what's owed, and out here in the swamps, a debt is a debt, hear?"

I started to cry. He stared at me a moment and then stepped toward me ominously. I cringed against the shack wall.

"I don't want to hear cryin'; I don't want to hear yellin'. I want a quiet, obedient woman, just like my daddy had twice. Now I got you somethin' to wear, somethin' that ain't fancy. You're a swamp woman now." He dug under the cot and came out with what looked like another sack. "Put this here on. Now!" he shouted, some spittle raining over me.

My body was shaking; I couldn't move. He reached down and grabbed my left arm just below the elbow, squeezing so hard, I screamed. Then his left hand cracked across my right cheek, snapping my head back. The shock of it was worse than the pain that followed. I couldn't speak or swallow down the throat lump. He dug his fingers into the top of my head and gathered a clump of my hair, pulling me to my feet. I was sobbing silently, my chest feeling as if it would burst.

"Get them fancy rags off now," he ordered. "Do it!"

My hands shaking, I began to unbutton my blouse. I was crying and shaking the whole time. When I slipped off my skirt, he smiled with satisfaction.

"You take all of that off," he ordered. "Even them store-bought underwear. Do it. I got to see what I got."

I thought I would faint first. The air in the shack was stifling. My skin was crimson from the heat of fear passing through my body. When I didn't move, he turned, found a wide, black leather belt in the pile of clothing, and wrapped one end of it around his wrist and hand. My eyes widened as he approached, lifting his arm. I raised my arms to protect myself, and he swung the belt and slapped me across the thigh. The blow took my breath away.

Instead of lifting me by my hair this time, he dug his fingers under my bra and pulled with such force that the hooks gave way and the bra was torn from my body. He tossed it over his shoulder. I fell back against the cot, screaming. He hit me again, this time on the other leg. I felt my eyes roll back, and then all was dark.

When I opened my eyes again, I was on my back on the cot, wearing the sack dress with nothing underneath. I didn't move. The pain along my thighs reminded me vividly of what had happened. I saw that my lucky dime was gone, too. At first I was afraid to turn to the right or the left, but when I did look, I saw he wasn't there. I took a deep breath and sat up to be sure he wasn't in a corner or below me on the floor. The shack was empty.

Encouraged and hopeful, I stood up, but realized I still had that chain locked around my ankle. I tried to slip it over my ankle bone, but it was too tight. Maybe I could get the other end loose, I thought. If I had to, I'd carry that chain for miles to escape.

As I started across the shack, I saw a large note pinned to the closed front door. It had apparently been written with a burned piece of wood: "I went to get some whiskey and food for you to cook. Clean up fore I get back. Your husband Buster."

Panicking, I hurried over to the railroad spike and tried to get that end of the chain loose, but it was just as tightly wrapped and locked.

I opened the front door and stepped out on the gallery. I realized Buster had taken my watch, but I knew I had been here for some time because the sun was down over the cypress trees, casting long, dark shadows over the canal. Buster wasn't in sight, but neither was anyone else. Even so, I yelled, "Anyone, please help me! Please, anyone!"

I waited. My voice echoed over the water and died in the swamp. An egret flew out of the trees, soared over the water, and disappeared down the canal. When I looked off the left side of the gallery, I saw that the sky was growing overcast. A thick bed of ash-gray clouds was sliding in over the turquoise background, and the wind had begun to blow through the swamp. Then I turned to the right side of the gallery and saw a cottonmouth snake that had woven its body through the slats. It tightened its coil when it saw me. I couldn't breathe. Slowly I made my way back to the shack doorway and then stepped in and slammed it shut.

Buster Trahaw could leave at will without worrying about my escaping. I was chained inside and guarded by every creature that lived in the swamp, I thought. What was I going to do? Afraid of what Buster would do if he returned and I hadn't cleaned, I started to straighten up the shack. I picked up and folded all the clothing, most of it filthy. I gathered the dishes and pans and put them in the sink. The water was rust brown, but I washed the dishes as best I could. When that was done, I scrubbed the plank table, straightened up what little furniture there was, and made the cot bed. I found a broom in the corner. Half of it was gone, but there was enough for me to sweep the plank floor. I took a wet rag and cleaned the windows. I looked everywhere for my clothes, but I couldn't find them. I guessed he had thrown them into the swamp along with my watch and bracelet.

There was a small wooden box in the far right corner. I was hoping there was something in it, perhaps a tool that I could use to tear off this lock and chain, even though I didn't know what I would do once I was free of it. There was no other canoe outside, and I certainly couldn't swim in the canal with alligators and snakes just waiting. I had no shoes either, so even if I made it to the marsh, I would be terrified stepping through the tall grass.

There were no tools in the box, just a pretty linen tablecloth with hand-embroidered birds; but under the tablecloth I found some old sepia-tinted photographs. They were pictures of a pretty young woman standing barefoot on the grass in front of my great-grandmère Catherine's shack. When I studied the face, I realized the woman resembled Mommy. Buster had claimed this was my great-grandpère Jack's trapper shack. I guess it was and this was my grandmère, Gabrielle.

If only her spirit were here now, I thought, hoping for the only thing that could help me . . . a miracle. There were pictures of an older couple who I imagined were my great-grandmère Catherine and my great-grandpère Jack. In one of them, Great-Grandmère Catherine was holding a baby, who I imagined had to be Mommy. Seeing their faces and realizing who they were gave me some comfort and for the moment I felt a warmth and a sense of hope. Somehow, some way, I would get out of this horrible situation.

I put the pictures back and closed the wooden box. Then I stood up and gazed about the shack. Where could I hide? What could I use to defend myself? A trapper's long knife hung on the wall. I seized it. I had never imagined myself stabbing anyone, even the likes of Buster Trahaw, but when someone was desperate, even someone like me, she could reach down into places she never thought existed within herself and find the strength. I was sure of it.

Suddenly I heard his thin laugh. Then Buster shouted for his wife to come to the door. I put the knife back, intending to use it when I had the best opportunity, and then I tiptoed to the door and opened it just enough to peer out. I saw him poling up the swamp toward the shack, pausing every few moments to take a swig from his jug.

"Wife! Get out on the gallery and greet your husband!" he screamed. "Get your rump out there or I'll beat it till the skin comes off! Hear? Get out!"

Terrified to disobey, I stepped out on the galerie. Even the cottonmouth must have heard him and fled, for it wasn't there.

"Now, that’s more like it," he cried. "Wave. Go on. Wave."

I lifted my hand and limply did so. He laughed again and poled harder until he reached the dock. The whole shack seemed to shake when he stepped up. He staggered for a moment and then smiled and handed me a bag of groceries.

"Got us our wedding dinner," he said. "And lots to drink. Buster's finally going to celebrate his marriage. Take it." I moved quickly and did so. Then I turned and went into the shack. He came in and stood gaping.

"Well, now, this is a wife. I knew it. I knew a Landry wouldn't let me down. Good woman. We gonna have a good life together."

"What is this?" I asked timidly when I took out what was in the bag and unwrapped some of it. "Pig's feet and gizzards and all the fixin's for a gumbo. Don't you know how to make a roux?" I shook my head. "What! Sure you do, woman. You just stand there and work until you get it right, hear? I'll just sit back here, drink a little rotgut, and watch my good woman work. Go on. Do it! And if it ain't good, I'll take it out on your hide. You got one nice hide, too." He put his large hand on my back and slid it down over my buttocks and squeezed until I cried out, which only made him laugh harder.

"First we eat; then we consummate the marriage," he said in a hoarse whisper. His lips were beside my ear, and his breath smelled like a dead rat. My stomach churned, and my legs felt as if' they would crumble, but I closed my eyes and held myself up, fearing that if I did faint, it would only be worse.

Fumbling with the ingredients, I tried desperately to remember what our cook did. I had watched her work a few times. A roux was only a brown sauce, but every Cajun cook did something different to make it special. My hope was that Buster would be too drunk to know what anything really tasted like. For the time being, I had to pretend I knew what I was doing. And so I started to prepare the meal, which to Buster Trahaw was a celebration but to me was more like a last supper.

Buster sprawled on the cot as I worked, and after a while, when I turned to look at him, I saw he was asleep. I gazed up at the knife. I could get it off the wall quietly, tiptoe over to him and . . . Could I do it? Of course. I had dissected frogs and worms. I knew where the blade should go, but I had never deliberately killed anything. I cried if I accidentally stepped on a grasshopper. I knew, however, that if I didn't do something, Buster would have his way with me.

Maybe I could just frighten him into giving me the key to the lock, I thought. I could put the knife to his throat and tell him to get the key out of his pocket, or maybe I should just hit him hard over the head with the cast-iron frying pan. My body was shaking with all these choices.

I heard him grunt and then snore. His eyes were closed, and his head was turned to the wall. This was my chance to get the knife. I put down the mixing spoon gently and just as gently started toward the knife, holding the chain as I moved so it wouldn't rattle over the floor.

Buster grunted again and I paused, holding my breath. He blew air through his thick lips, snorted, and then began to snore again. I tiptoed closer to the knife, reached for it, nearly dropped it, and then clutched it to my bosom. I turned slowly and just as carefully made my way back. When I was only a foot or so from him, I closed my eyes and prayed for the strength.

Mammy could do this if she had to, I told myself. My father and poor Pierre were waiting for me to find Mommy and bring her home. I couldn't remain a prisoner in this shack much longer, and all that was standing between me and my freedom was this cruel man who didn't deserve an ounce of mercy. I stood there, hardening my heart against him until I was convinced I had the courage to do what had to be done. Then I stepped forward, raised the knife, and pressed the blade against his ugly Adam's apple, which resembled a small rodent under his skin.

I pressed it quickly, and his eyes snapped open.

"Wha . . ."

"Don't move a muscle," I said, "or I’ll slice your throat the way you slice a pig's." I pressed the blade tighter.

"Hold on, now, hear?" he said. "That's a sharp knife."

"Then don't move until I tell you to move," I said.

"I ain't movin'. Damn," he said, sobering up quickly. "This ain't no way for a man's wife to behave."

"I am not your wife and I never will be," I said. "I'd rather be dead, so don't think I won't cut your throat," I warned. I was surprised at the fury and the determination in my voice. "I have this knife right up to your jugular. Your blood will spray all over that wall you're staring at," I warned him. I could see his eyes widen and bulge with the imagined sight.

"Easy, now," he said. "I'm not going to hurt you. You be my wife."

"I told you. I'm not your wife. Now reach slowly into your pocket and take out the key to this lock you have around my ankle. Go ahead, but slowly. Slowly!" I cried, pressing the blade against his throat again.

"I'm movin' easy," he cried. He slipped in his hand into his pocket and came up with the key. I took it quickly.

"Don't move. Put your hand back into your pocket," I ordered. "Go on." He did so.

It was a bit of a contortion for me, but I lifted my foot up to the cot, threaded the key into the lock and turned it. It snapped open, and I took it off, loosening the chain so I could slip my foot free.

Now my problems were just starting, I thought. Once I took the knife from his throat, what was to prevent him from turning on me and attacking me again? Thinking quickly, I realized I could just duplicate what he had done. I picked up the chain and put it over his leg.

"Whatcha doin'?"

"Lift this leg. Lift it!" I screamed, keeping the knife pressed tightly to his throat. He did so and I pulled the chain under and around, threaded the lock through the links just the way he had done to tighten the chain, and snapped it shut. Then I took a deep breath to try to slow my heartbeat.

"You're crazy, woman. You can't do this to Buster Trahaw."

I counted to three and pulled the knife away and stepped back just a second before he took his hand out of his pocket and reached out to grab my wrist. Only an inch of space fell between us, but it was enough. I ran for the door as he turned on the cot and lunged.

He had enough chain to reach a foot or so out the front door, so I had to get out and to the pirogue before he reached that point. I nearly slipped and fell into the water when I hurried down the steps. I grabbed the railing. It cracked, but held my weight and I swung around to get my footing again.

Buster was out the door, waving his mallet-sized fist in the air and cursing. "You git back here and unlock this chain, hear? Git back here!"

I flung the key into the air and it plopped into the water. Buster's eyes bulged with fury. His face was cherry red; he looked as if the blood vessels in his cheeks and forehead would burst. He was so shocked and angry he couldn't form sensible words. He stuttered and stammered and waved his fist wildly, pounding his own thigh. Then he jerked on the chain, straining so hard the veins in his neck popped against the skin. Fortunately, he couldn't get the chain over his knee. However, the effort and the pain filled him with even greater frustration.

I didn't wait to see what he would do next. I stepped into the pirogue, untied it, and took the pole into my hands the way I had seen him do it. I pushed away from the dock.

"Don't you dare leave Buster Trahaw!" he screamed. "Don't you dare!"

I pushed down. The pole went so deep, I thought I would never reach bottom. I nearly fell over with the attempt and my effort to steady myself. The pirogue started rocking precariously. Terrified of falling into the murky canal water, I sat down hard and waited for the canoe to steady itself. Buster continued to scream, his voice driving birds out of the branches. I think even the fish swam away.

I rose again and, more carefully this time, stuck the pole into the water until I found something solid. I pushed and the momentum sent the canoe forward. Another thrust moved it faster. I felt more confident and did it again. When I turned, however, I saw that I was driving the canoe toward a pile of fallen cypress trees. I switched sides quickly and poled to the opposite direction. Then I looked back at the shack. Buster had been quiet for a moment. He was staring at me, disbelieving; but when he saw I was making headway, his anger rushed back in an even greater wave of rage. He stepped back into the shack and then charged forward, tearing the spike from the floor and freeing the chain.

His momentum carried him over the railing and into the swamp. He fell with a gigantic splash. For a moment I just stood there watching, and then I saw him pop up. Chain and all, he started to swim after me. I dug the pole in frantically, my fear making my efforts clumsy. The canoe went too far to the right, hit a rock, bounced, then went too far to the left and almost got caught up in weeds. I pushed and tugged.

Buster drew closer and closer. His powerful body cut through the swamp water almost as quickly as an alligator. I could see his red face drawing nearer. I cried and dug the pole down, pushed and pushed, sobbing as I struggled to stay a few feet ahead of him.

"I'll get you and whip you good!" he vowed. "Stop that canoe." He paused to wave his fist at me, and I dug in again so I could make the turn and pass through the narrow opening to enter the wider canal. For a moment he was gone from sight. I developed a smoother rhythm and pushed with more accuracy, but I hadn't realized that the canal was shallow at the turn. When Buster reached it, he gathered the chain in his hands and walked over the mound. Just when I thought I might have put enough distance between us to make his catching up with me impossible, he appeared only a half dozen feet away on the shore.

I pushed harder. Desperation gave me needed strength. He scampered through the narrow water and then dived in again, holding the chain with one arm for a moment, like a lifeguard saving a drowning swimmer. His power and determination were over-whelming. Surely he could catch me soon, I thought, and I would be doomed to a terrible punishment.

When the water grew deeper, he released the chain and began to swim with both arms. Now he was less than a half dozen feet from the canoe. I was only going to have a few more moments of freedom, I thought, and I contemplated diving into the swamp myself if he seized the canoe in those big hands of his. He might very well pull it over anyway, spilling me into the canal.

I was so tired. My thrusts grew shorter and the length of time between them longer. My hands were stinging with the effort, the skin on my palms blistered and bleeding. My shoulders ached, and my chest felt as if I had swallowed a rock which lay there, just under my pounding heart.

"Leave me alone!" I cried when he drew close enough for me to see his clenched teeth and snarling lips.

He dug his arms into the water with more determination, and then suddenly he stopped with a jerk.

"What the . . ." he cried with surprise. I saw him duck down and pull on the chain. "I'm caught on somethin'," he yelled. He treaded water as he struggled to free the chain.

I hesitated, held the pole, and let the canoe drift on its own for a moment. He could be faking it, I thought, but he did look as if he had been surprised.

"Help me!" he called. "Don't leave me out here like this. Get back here."

Something splashed on my right.

"Alligator!" he yelled.

What was I going to do? If I went back and saved him, he would surely hurt me, but . . . to leave him there, helpless . . .

Maybe he would be grateful and too tired to take any revenge, I thought. I just couldn't leave him. A side of me was shouting warnings as I attempted to stop the pirogue and turn it back toward him. It took more effort than I imagined, but the canoe finally stopped its forward motion. He was waving and shouting. A good distance had developed between us.

I dug the pole in and pushed, using all my weight to start the canoe back. It inched forward and then picked up some momentum.

"That's a good woman," he cried. "That's a good wife. Buster ain't goin' to hurt you anymore. You can do what you want. Just get me out of the water fast. Come on, push on that pole. Good."

I pushed again and then I heard him splashing water and screaming at something. "Get out of here, go on, git."

I looked back and saw Buster lift a long, green snake out of the water and fling it. Then he shouted again, his voice far more shrill. The reason showed itself in the form of an alligator tail slapping the water nearby and then another one and another one. Buster was spinning around, fighting them off, but suddenly his head bobbed.

"Oh, my God," I muttered.

His head emerged. I saw him gasp for air and then go down again. He rose once more, but this time his body was limp and his arms weren't swinging. He floated there a moment and then went under. Bubbles formed where his head had been, and then they popped and all was still. I waited and watched. My stomach churned. I had to sit down because I started to dry-heave. I gasped and held my breath and then gasped. Every time I looked back at where he had been, I felt nauseated. Finally, that feeling subsided, but it was followed by a wave of fatigue that made my legs feel as if they were made of cement.

I gazed at my torn up hands, felt the aches in my arms and shoulders, but stood up and began to pole again anyway. I did so slowly, methodically, realizing I was slipping into a state of shock. I was terrified of what would happen to me if I passed out in the swamp.

When I looked ahead, I realized I was going through a canal, but there were other openings along the way. Which one would take me back to Cypress Woods? Should I turn right or left, take the first or second? All of the canals looked the same right now; the vegetation, rocks, and fallen cypresses resembled the ones I had seen when Buster poled the pirogue to the shack. Panicking, I made a choice, only to discover it led to a shallow, brackish cove with no other outlet. I had to turn about and pole back.

My stomach ached with an emptiness that made me feel light-headed. Here I was, a girl who had grown up in the Garden District of New Orleans, living in the finest home, catered to, spoiled, dainty, now dressed in a potato sack, poling a half-rotted canoe through a swamp filled with insects, alligators, snakes, and snapping turtles. And I was lost!

I started to laugh. I knew it was a hysterical reaction, but I couldn't help it. My laughter echoed around me and soon turned to sobs. When I succeeded in getting the canoe into another, wider canal, I paused and sat down. My throat was so dry I couldn't swallow and my tongue felt like a lump of sand. I gazed about helplessly, looking for some sign, some indication of direction. How could the bayou people make their way through these swamps? I wondered.

Exhausted and defeated, I lay back. The pirogue rocked with the movement of the water. Two egrets flew over me and peered down curiously but cautiously before flying off. They were followed by a more courageous cardinal who landed on the bow of the pirogue and did a small tap dance with its eyes on me.

"Do you know how to get out of here?" I asked.

The cardinal lifted his wings as if to shrug and then flew off after the egrets. I closed my eyes again and settled back, too tired to think. I must have fallen asleep for a few moments and drifted, for when I opened my eyes again, I was bouncing gently against a fallen cypress tree. A family of muskrats had trekked up to sniff and study me, but when I moved, they all scurried into the bush. I sat up, dipped my hand into the water, and scrubbed my face to wake myself up. Then I stood up and pushed the canoe away from the tree.

Just as I started to thrust the pole into the water, I heard the hum of a motorboat. It was hard to tell from which direction it was coming, but I waited. It grew louder, and I realized it was coming from my right. I poled the canoe in that direction. A moment later the boat appeared. It was just a small dinghy, but I saw Jack sitting in it. No sight ever looked better.

"Jack!" I shouted.

The sound of the motor kept him from hearing my shout as he went past. I screamed again, but he disappeared around a bend. Frustrated, I poled the canoe in his direction, but what chance did I have to catch up with a motorboat? I eventually stopped and sat down again, feeling an overwhelming sense of defeat. The water lapped against the canoe. I glanced upward at a sky turned stormy and forbidding, herald-ing rain and wind. What if there was another hurricane?

I put my stinging palms together under my chin, closed my eyes and prayed.

"Dear God," I said. "I know I haven't been as religious as I should be, and I know I have a scientist's skepticism about miracles, but I hope you will hear me and have mercy on me."

I rocked back and forth and started to sing a hymn. Then I closed my eyes and lay back again. Perhaps there was such a thing as destiny, I thought. Perhaps Mommy's faith in the inevitability of fate existed. Somehow, for reasons that would always remain mysterious, it was determined that I would be brought back to these swamps and they would claim me. Maybe all my efforts to become a doctor, to be someone else, were foolish vain efforts after all. Someone with stronger gris-gris had put a curse on our family, and we couldn't overcome it. I began to understand why Mommy felt she had to run away, to find some way to save her family from what she believed was inevitable disaster.

I was even too tired to cry. All I could do was lie there and wait for something terrible to happen. And then I heard the distant murmur of the dinghy motor again. It grew louder. I sat up and waited. Moments later the dinghy appeared. Jack saw me and steered in my direction. He cut his engine and brought the dinghy up beside my canoe. He was too shocked to speak; he just stared for a moment. I stared back, not sure if he was an illusion or real.

"Pearl, I've been frantic, searching for you. What are you doing in that canoe? And why are you dressed in a . . . a sack?"

Instead of answering, I started to cry. He moved quickly to get me safely into his dinghy.

"Look at you; look at your hands. What happened?"

"Oh, Jack," I said, "Buster Trahaw . . . tricked me into going with him. He took me to a shack, where he chained me up and said I was his wife. I escaped, but he came after me. Then he drowned or was eaten by alligators, and . . ." I was too exhausted to continue.

"Mon Dieu." He kissed my cheek and held me. "Don't worry. You're safe now. I won't let anything else happen to you. Let me get you back to Cypress Woods."

He started the motor, and we were off.

I looked back once at the pirogue bobbing in the swamp water. It had taken me to hell and back.