Off the Record

Chapter 25 CRACKED OPEN

Hayden and Liz spent the next day walking around D.C. She had never been there before and wanted to go to every museum and monument they could get into. They walked around the Capitol building and managed to get a tour of the White House. They had alternated pretending to hold hands with George Washington in his portrait in the East Wing and had corralled a total stranger into taking a really great shot of them together in front of the building.

Their afternoon was spent inside the National Mall looking at dinosaur bones and walking through endless exhibits at the Smithsonian. The night was filled with dinner and drinks at a laid-back tapas restaurant with Jamie and James. Hayden’s friends had to stay late at the office and didn’t know when they would be off, but had promised to meet them the next night.

That was all right with Liz. After spending all day walking in the summer heat, she was pretty tired. She would have to muster the energy to go out tomorrow. As it was she was ready to pass out from exhaustion.

Liz slept in pretty late the next morning, and then they went out to look at some of the monuments they had missed after spending all day at museums.

She was immediately regretting sleeping in when they got to the Lincoln Memorial and found it packed with people. Apparently families and summer camps made the Lincoln Memorial a regular afternoon stop. People were sitting by the Reflecting Pool eating lunch and covering the steps to the Memorial. They had to nudge past a couple massive groups to even make it all the way up the stairs.

“Guess we should have done this yesterday,” Liz said, looking around the shoulder of a parent volunteer. She could see the statue, but it wasn’t the most pleasant experience.

“Yeah, this is ridiculous,” Hayden said, standing on the step below her.

“Seriously,” Liz groaned. The woman standing in front of her had scooted over and blocked her view.

“Come on. Let’s come back later.” Hayden reached out for her elbow and tugged lightly.

“What? No, we don’t have to do that. I don’t mind,” she said, not wanting to be an inconvenience. Hayden had already been here before; they didn’t need to come back just for her if she could get a good enough look now.

“Nah, let’s go. It’s a better view at night anyway. You’d probably like it,” he said. He directed her away from the mass of people.

“All right, if you’re sure.”

“Definitely. If you want to see it,” he said over his shoulder, “then we’ll come back.”

They walked back down the crowded steps and along the path on one side of the Reflecting Pool. Liz was glad that she had on loose cotton clothing, because it was way too hot to be out in jeans, like some of the other tourists. Her hair was up in a tight ponytail, and she wished she had brought a hat with her to block out the sun beating down.

They passed the World War II Memorial and kept walking to the Washington Monument. The area around the Monument was as packed as the Lincoln Memorial, but luckily they didn’t have to get close to see the giant obelisk rising to the heavens.

Passing the Smithsonian Institution again, Hayden chose a restaurant near the National Mall for lunch. It was a small burger joint and the only seating was outside. Hayden paid for both of them, and they carried their food to the empty table. The burgers were pretty incredible, not that she was hard to please. She wasn’t sure if it was because of the heat or if they were really that good.

They finished their meal and were about to head back on the Metro, when Hayden stopped.

“Hey, I know one more place we need to go,” he said, grabbing her hand and pulling her in the opposite direction. “It’s right around the corner. Come on.”

He set out at a quick jog, and Liz followed, laughing. “Why are we running?”

“I can’t believe I forgot to show you,” he said. “I didn’t even think about it.”

They turned the corner and walked right up to a giant building. Hayden never released her hand the whole time. She was about to extract it from his grasp, when she looked up at the building and saw that it read Newseum on the side. Liz stared forward with awe. It was a building dedicated to newspapers.

“How could you forget this?” she murmured.

“I don’t know. But they have the front page of the main newspaper from every state displayed outside, as well as from several different countries,” Hayden told her.

They walked and stood before the newspapers all displayed in glass cases in alphabetical order by state. It was pretty incredible to witness. She recognized the majority of the papers, but seeing them all out on display made her happy. One day she wanted to be working at one of these papers.

They stopped in front of North Carolina, and when Hayden saw the front page he had to laugh, because he knew the reporter who had the main story. She felt him circle his thumb against her hand, and she tensed.

She wanted to say that she didn’t like it, and that she wished she weren’t standing there with Hayden holding her hand, but it would be a lie. The whole moment felt a bit too perfect, and yet so different at the same time.

Here she was completely out in the open in the middle of the day holding a guy’s hand. It didn’t have to be Hayden; it could be anyone, because it wasn’t Brady. She could never have this with Brady.

And at that moment, it wasn’t Brady versus Hayden…not by a long shot. It was Brady versus not Brady, and Hayden happened to be providing the one thing she wanted from the one person she couldn’t have it from.

She sighed, hating her heavy thoughts. She had come to D.C. to escape for a little while, and she didn’t want to think about all of the confusion that came with her secret life. Regardless, she removed her hand from Hayden’s and leaned forward against the glass to point at something. She didn’t want to make it too obvious and hoped he didn’t think anything of it…or try again.

“Did you want to go inside?” he asked, pointing at the museum. “We might still have time.”

Liz checked her watch and saw how late it was. “I do, but if we’re going to go out tonight, I don’t think it’s feasible.”

“We can go out a little later if you want to see it,” he suggested. “I don’t mind.”

Liz bit her lip and looked up at the building. She did want to go inside. It was such an unbelievable surprise…as if he knew just the right thing to make up for the Lincoln Memorial.

“All right. You convinced me.”

Hayden’s face lit up. He grabbed her hand again, and she let him direct her into the Newseum, where they spent much longer than they should have perusing every aspect of the museum dedicated to journalism.

Hayden and Liz met Phillip and Topher out at a bar near George Washington University. The guys went to school there and had a bunch of friends who lived in the area.

The bar was located off of Pennsylvania Avenue with a giant sign over the top of the entrance. When they entered, the room was already pretty packed full of college students and young professionals working on the Hill. The room was all hardwood floors, dark wooden bars stocked with liquor, and a large staircase leading to a second floor. Girls in low-cut tank tops and miniskirts served drinks. Grinding hip-hop beats blasted from the speakers, and people dancing in the center of the room took up the majority of the space.

Liz had dressed up for the occasion in a short mint summer dress. It had thin spaghetti straps that ended in a scoop neck with a wrap look from the waist down. She had paired it with nude high heels and a long, thin silver necklace with an owl pendant at the end. Her hair was down despite the temperature, and she was already wondering if that was a bad idea.

They found Phillip and Topher having zero luck talking to a group of girls by the bar.

“Hey, y’all,” Hayden said, approaching his friends.

“Lane,” Topher said with a brief nod in their direction before returning to his conversation with the girl.

Phillip turned and then acted as if he was trying to see behind them. “Where’s Jamie?” he asked, raising his eyebrows.

“She’s not here,” Hayden said, shaking his head.

“What? Why not? I thought you said she was coming.”

“She’ll be here later,” Liz told him, saving Hayden from having to say it. “She’s meeting up with some friends first.”

“Ugh! Let’s get drinks before he starts talking about her.” Hayden slid his hand around her waist and guided her toward an open space at the bar.

One of the perky blond bartenders came over to get their order. She smiled brightly at Hayden and gave him sex eyes. Liz wondered whether that was how she earned her tips or if it was specifically for Hayden.

He looked good tonight in navy shorts with a gray-and-white striped button-down, a thick brown belt, and matching brown Sperrys. Laid-back preppy, like normal. She couldn’t imagine him any other way.

“Whiskey sour, right?” Hayden asked Liz, still not moving his hand from the small of her back.

How did he remember that? she wondered.

“Perfect. Thanks,” Liz responded. She leaned her elbows against the bar.

“A whiskey sour and a Maker’s and Coke,” Hayden ordered. He handed the bartender his credit card. “You can leave it open.”

“Sure thing,” the bartender said, winking at him.

Hayden turned his attention back to Liz as the girl started making their drinks. “I’m really glad you decided to come visit this weekend,” he said with that same smile. His hazel eyes were dark in the dim lighting as they looked down at her.

“Me too. I’ve had a really good time. It was nice to get away,” Liz said with a sigh.

“You wanted to get away from your amazing summer to spend a few days with some random guy, you know,” he said, blowing it off as if it was nothing.

“Yeah, just some guy,” she said, rolling her eyes. “I’d never even met him before or anything.”

“Nope. You’re a bit of a stalker, Liz.”

“Oh, you know, it’s what I do in my spare time. Actually, it’s kind of my job. I don’t know if you know, but I’m a big-time reporter.”

Hayden fake-gasped. “I had no clue.”

“Here you go, hon,” the bartender said, reappearing with their drinks and sliding them across the bar. “Anything else?”

Topher and Phillip appeared behind Hayden at that moment. Phillip shoved Hayden out of the way and into Liz, who grabbed onto him quickly.

“Guys, watch what you’re doing!” Hayden called.

Liz’s body was flush against Hayden’s, and when he looked down at her, she blushed and pulled away.

“We’re going to need,” Phillip said, and started counting the people, “six shots of SoCo. Got to do it right for my buddy from the Carolinas.”

“There are only four of us,” Hayden observed.

Topher nudged Hayden; he had his arms slung over the shoulders of two girls. “Meet Anne and Abigail.”

Liz shook her head at the display. The girls barely acknowledged them. Liz started making a bet with herself on how fast these girls would ditch them after they took the shots.

“Six shots of SoCo,” Phillip said, passing around glasses as the bartender handed them to him. “Hope you don’t mind, Lane, but I put this on your tab.”

“That’s like fifty bucks,” Hayden said, exasperated.

“Better you than me,” he said, raising his shot glass in the air dramatically. “To nights you’ll never remember, and friends you’ll never forget.”

The group all cheered and clinked their shots together. Liz tilted her head back and let the liquor slide down the back of her throat in one swift motion. She closed her eyes and shook her head. Potent.

“Awesome,” Topher said, slamming his drink back on the bar.

“We’re uh…going to go dance,” one of the girls said with a shrug.

“Yeah, thanks for the drink,” the second one said, already attempting to retreat.

Called it, Liz thought.

“Aww, leaving already?” Phillip asked, walking with them away from the bar.

Liz laughed as Topher trailed after them too.

“That’s a lost cause,” Liz said.

“Those guys don’t give up easy,” Hayden told her. “The girls will give up fighting it before they do.”

They picked up their drinks and followed the guys back to where they were chatting up Anne, Abigail, and their friends. The girls all started dancing together to the rhythm of the music. Liz knew girls at home who used this as a defense so they didn’t have to dance with certain guys. Phillip and Topher stood and watched them for a couple minutes before coaxing one of the girls to dance with each of them. They were smoother than a lot of the guys she knew, but still.

The dance floor filled up as the alcohol flowed, and soon even Liz found herself dancing with the group of girls. She could only remember that the tall girl was Anne and the short one was Abigail. The rest of the girls blended together and really it didn’t matter. It was nice to kick back and enjoy herself. She forgot about everything that was frustrating and confusing about her summer and lived in the dance.

She didn’t even think she was that great, but she was living by Victoria’s motto tonight: If you’re a girl, you can shake it. Apparently that was all that was needed.

Liz danced sandwiched between the other two girls, feeling tipsy and giddy from the drink and heat. She raised her hands high over her head, swished her hips side to side, and dipped down low with the other girls. She dropped her head back and laughed as the girl in front of her touched her toes. It was all entirely too ridiculous, and that made it all the more fun.

Anne, the girl behind her, grabbed Liz’s hips to keep from falling over and ended up laughing loudly in her ear.

“Oh my God!” Anne cried.

Liz laughed and steadied herself against Abigail, who stood up and reached out for her friends in front of her. Liz glanced over at Hayden with the biggest smile plastered on her face.

He was standing there only a few feet away, just staring at her. She couldn’t judge his expression. It was like a mixture of curiosity with disbelief and a whole lot of where the hell did that come from?

Hayden caught her staring back and smiled. He took a few steps to bridge the distance between them and grabbed her hand, pulling her away from the girls. She landed against his chest and he drew her into him.

“Good Lord, what have you been doing all summer?” he whispered into her ear.

“What do you mean?” Liz asked innocently.

“You’re so…free,” he said, as if it was the only word he could come up with.

“It’s just me, Hayden.”

“You say that,” he said, his hands sliding to her hips and swinging them into time with his, “and then you dance like this.”

Liz wound her arms up around his neck. “No reason not to dance,” she murmured.

“No,” he agreed, “no reason at all.”

He stared down at her then and she saw in his eyes something she hadn’t noticed before—lust. Liz swallowed hard and tried to forget about it. That wasn’t what this was. Hayden had his chance at the end of the semester and had made it clear they were just friends. But she knew for certain that he was not looking at her like a friend.

The crowd drew in all around them as couples paired off, but when she was dancing with Hayden, it felt as if there wasn’t anyone else in that room.

As they continued to dance, Liz felt her heartbeat rise along with the temperature in the room. She couldn’t believe that after two years of crushing on Hayden, here he was finally showing her the attention she had been craving all along. It didn’t feel fair that it had taken a summer with Brady to change her, to open her up. It was as if he had unlocked a piece of her that she hadn’t even known existed.

Now here she was in a crowded nightclub with the guy she had always wanted, and to say she was conflicted was an understatement. She couldn’t turn off two years of attraction like a light switch, but she owed it to Brady. They had too much to work out for this to happen.

Their dancing slowed almost to a stop as Hayden drew her closer and closer to him. She dragged in a ragged breath as her eyes rose to his. She could feel his hot breath on her cheeks and his fingers dig softly into her back.

Oh God, she thought, seeing everything play out before her eyes as if in slow motion.

“Guys!” someone called, barreling against them and clinging to Liz’s arm.

Liz broke out of her trance and took a step away from Hayden. Her heart was beating fast and she knew her cheeks were crimson. She broke his gaze and looked over at the person holding on to her.

“Jamie,” Liz said, relieved. That had been close.

Jamie smiled brightly at her. She was dressed simply in a striped hi-lo dress and sandals. She threw her arms around Liz with a cheer. “Oh my God, you guys are still here!”

Liz laughed and moved her to arm’s length. “Of course we’re still here. How drunk are you?”

“The girls gave me too much wine,” she said with a giggle. “We should dance!”

“Um…your sister is pretty wasted,” Liz told Hayden.

“Shhhh, don’t tell him,” Jamie whispered into Liz’s ear.

“Jamie,” Hayden said, shaking his head. “You can hardly stand up.”

“Don’t you start.” Jamie pointed her finger in his face. “James will be here any minute, and I’ll hear enough from him.”

“Do you want me to go get you a water?” Hayden held her steady.

“Yes, I do, but first, bathroom,” she said with a giggle. “Liz, shall we?” She gestured out dramatically in front of her.

“Sis, your Drama Club is showing,” Hayden teased.

“Smack him for me,” Jamie told Liz before striding toward the bathroom.

“I’ll uh…go with her, I guess,” Liz said with a shrug.

Liz walked across the crowded bar and into the bathroom behind Jamie. It was packed with girls fixing their hair, applying makeup, gossiping, and there was always one throwing up into the toilet.

“I’ll be quick!” Jamie said, finding an open stall.

Liz stood against the wall with a huff. She tried not to think about how Hayden had almost kissed her. They had been in that position before, except this time she didn’t think he’d had any intention of backing off. She was thankful that Jamie banged into them when she did. She wasn’t sure if she would have stopped him if he had leaned forward, and that was disorienting.

What am I going to do the rest of the night? she wondered.

Jamie left the stall, walked to the sink, and started washing her hands.

“I just have to tell you something, Liz,” Jamie said, grabbing the last paper towel and drying her hands.

“Yeah?” Liz wondered what kind of drunken conversation they were about to have.

“I was really worried at first when Hayden said you were a reporter.”

“What?” she said, confused. “Why were you worried about that?”

Jamie tossed the paper towel. She turned to Liz and sighed as if it was such an obvious question. “I didn’t want him to be dating someone too rigid. You know, like him.”

Liz’s eyes bulged. “Oh, Jamie, we’re not…uh…we’re not dating.”

“Oh, yeah, of course,” she said, waving it off. “He mentioned that.”

“Yeah, just friends.” Liz hoped it would sink in.

“But seriously, you’re not uptight or anything! I mean I really like you!” she said, tossing her arms around Liz again.

“Well, thanks,” Liz said. She patted her back softly and then pulled away.

“I’m so glad that you’re here with him. He’s so much fun when you’re around. It’s not all about work this, the paper that.” Jamie gestured right and left and rolled her eyes. “He needs a good distraction.”

Liz really liked Jamie, but she couldn’t have this conversation. It was like Jamie had already convinced herself Liz and Hayden were good together. No matter what she said, she wasn’t going to be able to persuade his sister otherwise either.

“Maybe we should head back,” Liz suggested.

Jamie glanced down at her phone and nodded. “I think James is here!”

They walked out of the bathroom and Jamie immediately launched herself at her boyfriend. They disappeared on the dance floor a second later, leaving Hayden and Liz alone once more.

“You want another drink?” he asked with a cute smirk on his face.

Liz nodded and followed him to the bar. He ordered them both another round of drinks. As they waited, he moved her back against the bar and squared her in with his body. One of his hands brushed her messy waves off to one shoulder and the other slung across the back of the bar.

“Did I tell you how amazing you look tonight?” he murmured, leaning forward to speak directly into her ear.

A shiver crept down her back at his nearness. She shook her head.

“You look amazing,” he repeated.

“Thank you,” she said softly, not even sure whether he could hear it over the music.

The bartender passed drinks to Hayden, who handed Liz hers. “Come on. Let’s dance some more.”

They spent the rest of the evening trapped in a mass of dancers at the bar. Topher and Phillip left with Anne and Abigail later. They stopped by long enough to say good-bye and smile smugly, as if they knew Liz hadn’t believed they would score. Jamie started feeling sick shortly after that. James apologized to them for her. Hayden closed his tab and then helped James haul her out of the bar. Hayden left her with James to flag down a cab. A few minutes later one showed up that would take them back to the apartment.

“Hayden, you’re not coming with?” Jamie asked, looking like she might throw up any second.

“We’ll be back soon,” he said with a smile as he tucked her into the car. Jamie lay back against James just as Hayden shut the door.

“We’re not going back?” Liz asked, furrowing her brow.

“I wanted to show you something. Hope that’s okay,” he said, wrapping his arm around her shoulders and directing her to walk in the opposite direction of his apartment.

A few minutes later, they stood in front of the Reflecting Pool once more. Her feet were sore from walking the few blocks to their destination in heels, but it was a pretty sight. Everything was all lit up, and it was late enough that no one else was around.

Hayden pulled her toward the brightly lit Lincoln Memorial. She trekked up the stairs in her heels until she stood right in front of Lincoln’s enormous statue.

“I told you I’d get you your view,” he said. She could sense him inching closer to her.

“It’s beautiful, Hayden.” She continued to stare at the memorial.

“Lizzie,” he whispered.

She turned then at the way he said her name. He had never called her Lizzie before. She kind of liked the way it sounded coming out of his mouth. Hayden Lane, who was always completely controlled, was struggling for just an ounce of control around her. When had the world completely flipped upside down?

His hand came up and stroked along her jaw. He stared down into her big blue eyes and then his mouth found her lips softly, as if he was testing the water.

Liz stood very still. Her head was spinning as she felt her body betray her by reacting to his kiss. Tingles blossomed in her chest and awakened that old feeling she had kept hidden inside her for two years. This wasn’t supposed to happen. This was Hayden. He wasn’t supposed to be interested in her like that. And now…he was.

“Hayden,” she whispered, pulling back. “I thought you said that we couldn’t because of the newspaper.”

“I changed my mind,” he said.

“Hayden, I…” She trailed off as he kissed her once more.

“Shhhh,” he urged, “just kiss me.”

His hands were holding her face softly, and then when he kissed her again his hesitation was gone. He kissed her as if he had wanted to do it for a long time. He kissed her as if he would never get enough of her. He prodded her mouth open with his tongue and volleyed with her. When he dragged his teeth along her bottom lip, she took a swift breath. His lips were soft and warm and so entirely foreign. Her hands were gripping his shirt and, almost without thinking, drawing him in closer.

Butterflies fluttered in her stomach as the sexual tension between them contracted and then cracked wide open.

Hayden sighed and kissed her lips once more. He moved her arms up around his neck and grabbed her around the waist, holding her in place against him.

“Liz,” Hayden murmured.

“Mmm-hmm?”

“I should have done this a long time ago.”

Liz laughed lightly.

“Not kissing you last semester when I had a chance was a huge mistake,” Hayden said against her lips. “I’m not one to repeat mistakes.”