One Lavender Ribbon

Chapter 22

What must it be like to lose a spouse? Pops had already suffered that tragedy once; it seemed unthinkable that he might have to again. Adrienne sat in the small, brown chapel of the Naples Hospital, finally understanding Will’s fierce desire to protect his grandfather. For it was in the moment of Sara’s collapse that she’d looked into Pops’s eyes and seen the horror of death. Living beyond your friends, your parents, outliving so many who’d died too young. As Pops slumped to the floor holding Sara, Adrienne understood loss on a profound level, a level that transcended her years. And the pain of it was unbearable as she watched the gentle man with the soft, blue eyes falter as his world tumbled down around him like leaves on an autumn day.

And it was all her fault. It truly was. Unforgivable.

At the hospital, they were notified it would be at least an hour before they knew anything. From across the room, she had watched as Charles and Will stood on each side of Pops, shoring him up. When Will’s accusing eyes met hers, she left the room. By the time she found the chapel at the far end of the building, she was nearly running. Trying to outrun the pain she’d caused. He’d been right all along. What a bitter, bitter way to find out.

The chapel was a narrow room with cushioned pews. She couldn’t remember ever being in a church inside a hospital. She sat and tried to draw peace, but her heart only filled with accusation. Softly glowing bulbs above lit the space, showering the walls and floor with gentle soothing light. It helped, if only slightly. Yet this felt like a safe place.

Adrienne turned as a mother and small child entered and moved to the front. They sat across from her, and she could see the weight of uncertainty upon them. The child, who’d been clutching a teddy bear, dropped to her knees, set the bear aside, and with eyes squeezed shut began to pray. Adrienne watched. Did children’s prayers work better? All that hope, all that faith in those little innocent bodies. Could their heartfelt prayer reach deeper into heaven? Probably. When they were finished, the mother and child silently slipped out of the room. Adrienne was alone once again, as questions assailed her.

Why hadn’t she insisted Sara go to the doctor this morning? She’d seen how pale Sara was, saw her struggling to maintain her strength. If Adrienne had spoken up, maybe things would be different. She looked at her watch, a gift from Pops and Sara for all the help on the wedding. Her fingers toyed with the gold band as tears blurred the numbers.

If it weren’t for the deep love she felt for this family, especially Sara, she’d leave. Leave right now before Will got a chance to shred her with his words. They were right—they were all right, including Eric: All she did was cause trouble. Sure, she had good intentions. The very kind that paved the road to hell. Now she understood why.

But she didn’t leave. Wouldn’t run. Maybe she was a coward, but she wasn’t heartless. Alone in the chapel as the family huddled in the waiting room. She was an outsider who had forced her way into lives already recovering from one tragedy. Now she’d brought another.

Adrienne closed her eyes when she heard the chapel door close behind her. It was him. She steeled herself. She could hear his footsteps on the soft carpet as he made his way to her.

She was in the first pew, and instead of towering over her, he knelt.

When he gently cradled her hands in his, she slowly looked up to meet his gaze.

She’s gone, she knew he was going to say. Sara’s dead. The words rolled through her before he could speak. Scenes flashed through her mind of a funeral, Pops sitting by a grave, alone once again. Grief and regret flooded every inch of her body.

He gently squeezed her hands. “Adrienne?” he questioned, soft as a whisper.

She must be gone, why else would he not be screaming at her? Adrienne began to tremble. It started in her chest, her heart, the center of her being, and rippled outward. “Tell me,” she finally managed through gritted teeth.

He flashed a moment of puzzlement, then answered. “We . . . we don’t know anything yet.”

Relief engulfed her as the tension in her muscles released.

His eyes were green velvet, tender as a petal on a flower. “But you need to know something.”

She blinked, causing her vision to clear. Such softness from Will she couldn’t fathom. Maybe she was losing her mind.

He made tiny circles on her hands with his thumbs. “I wanted to find you to make sure you’re not somehow blaming yourself for this.”

Confusion spread through her system. “What do you mean?”

One hand slipped up to cup her face. “Listen to me. No matter what happens to Sara, you gave her and Pops a beautiful gift by bringing them together.”

When she tried to look away, his hand held her face steadfast.

“No matter how long or short that time might be.”

She stared at him, uncertain if he was really the Will Bryant she knew. He couldn’t be.

“Adrienne, no one is guaranteed a tomorrow. Life is a precious and delicate thing. At the very best, it’s a vapor. Pops spent a lifetime with the woman he loved. Now he’s had a chance to love a woman from a lifetime ago.” He moved from in front of her to the seat beside her and turned her to look at him. “Adrienne, you did the right thing.”

She shook her head, closed her eyes. Tried to get the disjointed pieces to fall together, but they didn’t. He was wrong. She hadn’t done the right thing at all. Pops and Will had had a good life before she came along with the letters. She should have left those letters in the box in her attic.

His voice rose. “Do you hear me? You did the right thing.”

She nodded absently in an attempt to make him stop talking. This wasn’t right. Wasn’t normal. He should be yelling at her. And she should learn her lesson.

“I want to hear you say it.”

Say it? No. She tried to slide away, but he wouldn’t let her. “I can’t. I can’t because I can’t believe that this much pain could be right.”

He took her hand and placed it over his heart. “Love is always the right thing. I’ve learned that now. I trust you, Adrienne. And I think you were right. Sometimes love isn’t enough alone. But love and trust together? You can’t walk away from that.”

He had to stop talking. Had to stop saying these words because though everything else was chaos, the words made sense.

“Sometimes love comes with pain. But you can’t just stop loving. You might as well be dead if you do.”

Her eyes were dry now, burning. “So love isn’t enough.”

He smiled and despite her fear, his warmth found a crack into her and forced its way through.

Will squeezed her closer. “No, love isn’t just enough. Real love is everything.”

His lips made their way to hers, and he kissed her. When he drew away, she tried to smile.

A glorious new sensation stormed through her system like rain in a desert, removing old scars of anger and mistrust. It gathered speed and force as wave after wave of dirt and cobwebs washed away in the tide of this new power. Strength settled in her bones, encircled her heart, and rejuvenated her limbs. For the first time in years, Adrienne tasted freedom.

They made their way from the chapel back to the rest of the family. Pops was sitting in a corner chair, elbows on the armrests and long legs stretched out in front of him. His fingers were laced together, one thumb making small circles around the other. It was interesting enough to hold Charles’ attention who sat in the chair next to him.

When the doctor came into the waiting room, everyone stood. He was young—didn’t look old enough to be a doctor—but Adrienne knew that was common in the ER. For a brief second, she wondered about his credentials, wondered if he was capable of treating a treasure like Sara.

He pulled the glasses from his face and rubbed them against his white coat. “Sara is suffering from acute dehydration.” He slipped them back onto his nose. “She’s stable and resting comfortably, but we’re going to continue to pump fluids into her for the next couple of hours. After that, she should be fine to leave if she’s feeling up to it.”

The entire room breathed a collective sigh of relief. “Dehydrated? That’s all?” Pops said.

The young doctor nodded. “Yes, it’s not that uncommon in older people in stressful circumstances.” His head tilted from one side to the other, no doubt a posture he’d practiced in the mirror a thousand times. “Sara told me she’d been burning the candle at both ends.”

“Sweet Sara,” Pops said. “Just try to slow her down.”

The doctor chuckled. “Yeah, I can see why that wouldn’t be easy. She’s low on iron too. She said she’s been dieting to get ready for the wedding, but I’m not allowing that anymore. I’m sending her with a week’s worth of B-12 shots. They’re simple to administer and will help boost her body’s immune system and energy level.” He pointed to Pops. “Plenty of lean, red meat for her over the next week or so will help her regain full strength.”

Pops nodded. “We can postpone the wedding until she’s feeling stronger.”

“Actually,” the doctor corrected, “you can’t.”

Pops questioned him with a look.

“Sara is adamant about the wedding going on as scheduled tomorrow.” The doctor crossed his arms in front of him. “I think that would be in order. She should be feeling good by then . . . as long as she rests today.”

Charles patted Pops shoulder.

The doctor’s eyes narrowed on Pops. “I’m actually only worried about one thing.”

Pops put his hands up in surrender. “We’ll do anything so Sara can have her wedding day.”

The doctor shook his head, but his mouth quirked in a smile. “I’m not worried about the wedding. I’m worried about the honeymoon.”

A bright stain colored Pops’s cheeks, as others in the group stifled snickers. Pops’s mouth hung open.

“I’m just kidding, Tiger. She’ll be fine.” He shook Pops’s hand, then Charles’s and after throwing an appreciative look to Adrienne and ignoring Will, he left.

Pops scratched the back of his head. All eyes were on him. He opened his mouth to speak but changed his mind. Instead, he forced his hands deep into his pockets, grinned, and shrugged.

In a room next door to the bride’s dressing chamber, a trio of men tugged at their collars and stared at their hands, wishing the time would move along more quickly.

“Are you scared?” Will stood to adjust Pops’s tie.

Pops’s gaze focused behind Will to an indistinct point. “No,” Pops said, and the calm and serenity in his single word echoed that. His eyes locked on his grandson’s. “I feel as though I’m on borrowed time. Life is best when you find someone to love, and you pour your heart and soul into it. Into her. Everything is sweeter. Everything is new, fresh. I got to do that not once, but twice. How could I be scared of what lies ahead when the whole world has been given to me and then given to me again?”

Will put his hands on Pops’s shoulders. “You really are a poet, Pops.” Find someone to love and pour your heart and soul into it. Will had fulfilled the first part. He loved Adrienne. Loved her more than life. She deserved someone who would pour his heart out for her. She deserved a man who could give her wings.

Some people were like pottery. They had been tested in a fire just hot enough to make them capable, but perhaps not durable. But Adrienne was fine porcelain. Delicate, yet purified in white-hot flame reserved for those who would stand every test thrown at them. He was fortunate to even know her. And more fortunate to love her.

She was the person he would pour his heart and soul into. But not just for him. For her. Because she deserved it. She deserved nothing less.

Pops lifted his hands so they rested on Will’s arms. “But don’t let the moment slip by,” he said, tightening his grip.

Will frowned. “What moment, Pops?” He searched the older man’s face.

Pops released a long breath and whispered, “You’ll know. You’ll know when it happens. You’ll know when the time is right, and don’t you dare back away from it. No matter what. You hear me, boy? No matter what or when.”

Will nodded, and hugged his grandfather, the man who’d taught him how to love. Then he turned and hugged his father, the man who had taught him how to sacrifice. And now, Will was capable of letting Adrienne soar, but also catching her if she fell. For the first time in his life, Will really, truly knew what it was to be a man.

Cinderella’s ballroom awaited the princess with an intimate gathering of thirty people. Will and Pops stood at the front of the room, wearing attractive dark suits, which caused each to stand a little taller. Adrienne walked down the aisle first, looking at Will, only occasionally leaving his approving gaze. His mouth had dropped open a little when she stepped in. She tried to hide a smile. Glancing around the room, she’d never felt more collective love than at this moment.

Taking her place opposite the two men, she pivoted and waited for Sara.

When Sara stepped in, there was a gasp that rippled through the crowd. A bouquet of white gardenias was clasped firmly between her hands. She drew in a shaky breath. Pops nodded admiringly, coaxing her forward. His face beamed with pride as he basked not only in her beauty but in the happiness emanating from her.

The ceremony began, Pops and Sara standing hand in hand, as the preacher spoke to them about love and commitment. Adrienne was lost in the fairy tale, wondering how weddings could be so similar and yet so different. Her eyes drifted to Will, the man she loved. Her mind strayed to the hospital. Their love was certainly unique. At the moment she thought Will would break her heart, he had instead cradled it, protected it. She remembered the poem she’d once shared with Sammie.

Where have all the poets gone?

Rhyme with passion left unsung,

Even now my heart it yearns,

Until my poet-prince returns.

Could Will Bryant be her poet-prince? Was it possible? Love was so much more than deep emotion; it was sacrifice, forgiveness. It was comfort. It was joy. She willed herself back to the ceremony as the preacher asked if there was anyone who saw any reason for these two not to be wed.

When she heard Will’s voice, her blood stopped moving.

He stepped forward. “Pastor Vernon, I do.”

Uncertainty darted around the room, bouncing off the candlelight.

Will swallowed, pulled a breath. “Until I say what I need to, I don’t think this wedding can continue.” He looked at Pops. But Adrienne noticed Sara, who turned to Will with a delighted look on her face.

Adrienne’s eyes burned from lack of blinking and being open too wide. A smile formed on Pops’s lips and he nodded, urging Will on. Then, Pops turned and winked at Sara knowingly.

“Say what you need to, Will,” she said.

Taking a deep breath, Will stepped past the couple and over to Adrienne, whose face was on fire. “I can’t believe I’m doing this,” he mumbled.

Pastor Vernon flashed a look that seemed to say, “how did I lose control of my ceremony?”

“Adrienne,” Will took her hands in his. “Until recently, I didn’t really understand what love was. But now I know. I’m not perfect. But I have two men who have helped me be—and will continue to help me be—the best man, the best husband anyone ever had.”

She sucked in a breath. Here? Now? “Will, we should talk about this later,” she whispered, eyes shooting to the group of waiting guests. Beside Pops, Sara beamed. Didn’t she realize Will had just interrupted the wedding. Her wedding. Through clenched teeth Adrienne said, “Later, okay?”

“Everyone here is our family.” With a wave of his hand he gestured to the crowd. “They love us and most of them would never forgive me for letting this moment pass.”

Adrienne’s pleading eyes went back to Sara but found no help as Sara anxiously awaited how this would play out. Then she turned to Pops—no help either. Surely, the preacher would be the voice of reason. But when her eyes met his, he had closed his Bible and rocked back on his heels, grinning and waiting.

“Adrienne, this is one of the things I learned from you.”

Her brows went up, head jutting forward slightly.

“You’re a risk taker. It’s one of the things I love about you.”

She heard Sara say, “She certainly is.”

Adrienne felt faint.

Will rolled his eyes. “I mean, at first, it was one of the things that drove me crazy, but you’re willing to put your heart on the line for someone else. How could anyone not love that?”

“We love it.” Sara again.

Her mind spun. This wasn’t happening. Couldn’t be happening. Besides, her plans had already been set in motion. “Will, I’m leaving in three weeks.”

The smile that had animated his face disappeared.

She shook her head. Yes, she loved him. But her life was moving in a different direction. “I was accepted at the school in Tallahassee.”

“Fine.” He nodded, taking only a moment to decide. “I’ll go with you.”

Again her breath left her. She swallowed hard. “You can’t just pick up and move—your job, your house.”

“There are banks in Tallahassee. Adrienne, you deserve to make your dreams come true. Every dream. And if the culinary school in Tallahassee is what you want, then I want to help make sure you get it.” His thumb grazed her cheek. “But you also deserve a hero. You should have someone who understands your complexity and will let you act like a woman one day and act like a kid the next. I don’t think I can trust anyone with that job but myself.”

The lump in her throat wouldn’t go down. “You . . . you would do that? Lose everything just to go with me?”

“I wouldn’t be losing anything. I would be gaining everything.” Will shot a quick look over to Pops. “Once, a really wise man told me that life is best when you find someone to love and you pour your heart and soul into them. Let me do that for you, Adrienne. Please.”

She couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t move. He was ruining everything.

Will leaned into her, his words soft, only for her to hear. “Marry me. If Tallahassee is where you want home to be, then so do I.”

Marry him.

The words rolled over and over in her head. Marry him, not so the world could revolve around him, but so his world could revolve around her. He was willing to do it. He was willing to sacrifice his whole world to make her dreams come true. The reality of this soaked into Adrienne. It was warm honey through her heart, slowly, completely and forever leaving its mark of sweetness. But sweetness had a way of turning bitter and . . . Quietly, she whispered, “That’s not what I want.”

All of the air left Will. His face became parchment, devoid of color. And she could see everything. Right there in his face and feel it in the breath he’d blown toward her. It was love and fear and pain.

Her head dropped, and she stifled a cry because she couldn’t bear to see such hurt. “I don’t want to go to Tallahassee. I don’t want to leave here. Leave my family.”

Will swayed toward her.

Adrienne gestured at the older couple. “I want to go on boat rides in the Gulf and eat vegetables out of Pops’s garden. I want to sit on the porch swing and visit with Sara.” Tears streamed down her face, landing on the silk dress she wore. “And I . . . I want to marry you.”

He grabbed her, hugged her, held her. Sara squealed and clapped her hands.

“I’m already home,” Adrienne whispered into his ear. She was only vaguely aware of the applause that rolled through the room.

Not wanting to let her go, Will reluctantly stepped back to his position as best man.

Pastor Vernon reopened his Bible. “Now, if no one else has any objections, I’d like to continue.” He gestured to Sara. “I believe you have something to share?”

Sara nodded, then unfolded the letter in her hands with trembling fingers.

Dear William,

For many years I wondered what my life would be like if the man I loved were beside me. Many days I stared down an empty road, hoping you would somehow appear. Many nights I cried myself to sleep. For all the wondering and dreaming I’ve done, it doesn’t compare to the joy in my heart. I promise to redeem the years. We may be old; our bodies may be tired and worn down. But I make you this promise: We will live, William. We’ll devour every opportunity given to us. And if I’m whisked away on the wings of angels before you are, I’ll leave you letters.

Tenderly, old hands found their way to her rosy cheeks, now wet with her own tears. Pops kissed her with all the passion of a man half his age.

After the vows, Pastor Vernon closed his Bible. “I now pronounce you man and wife.” With a half-grin, he gestured to Pops. “You may kiss the bride.”

“Now, turn and face the congregation while I present you,” Pastor Vernon said, gesturing toward the audience. “Ladies and gentlemen, please congratulate Mr. and Mrs. William Bryant.”

William and Sara made their way to the back, a shower of flower petals cascading over them as they passed each row.

Adrienne and Will came together in the front.

Pastor Vernon gestured toward Will. “I can run a fifty percent off special if you two would like to go ahead and tie the knot,” he joked.

“I’m sorry for the interruption earlier.” Will put an arm around Adrienne.

The preacher, who’d known the family since Will was old enough to get into fights on the church baseball field, smiled. “Never apologize for love. I think you gave your grandfather a terrific present by ruining his wedding.”

His joke was lost on Will as he stared into the deep, brown, sultry eyes he loved. “No thanks on the offer. Adrienne’s wedding is going to be for her alone. Whatever she wants, wherever she wants.”

And he pulled her into his arms, burying his head in the soft throat that was truly, finally his.

Much later that evening, Will and Adrienne sat on the beach, still in their wedding attire. The warm embrace of love surrounded them, shielding them from the coolness of the air that danced off the Gulf water. Her toes were dotted with sand, as were his. Their shoes had been discarded nearby. The sun played on the sea, causing it to look like diamonds spread on silk.

“What about Hawaii?” She tipped her head so that she could look at him.

“What about it?” he teased.

“For a wedding?”

“I’d love to go!” He threw her a sidelong glance. “Whose wedding is it anyway?”

“Ours.”

His heart jumped at those words. Ours. Adrienne would be his wife. “Oh, I’m terribly sorry, Miss Carter. But I’m afraid we can’t possibly get married.”

“And why is that?”

“Haven’t you heard? We aren’t even dating. It would be completely scandalous.”

“Yes,” she agreed, and left her chair to kneel in front of him. Her hands slid over his thighs, a sly grin on her face. “It would.” She nuzzled her head into the deep hollow of his throat. “Didn’t we agree that neither of us have enough scandal in our lives?” She forced out hot breath with each word—purposely—and the action had the desired effect.

His body shuddered. “Well,” he growled, catching a handful of her hair in his hand. “For the sake of scandal.”