Pure Indulgence

Chapter 10

As soon as they walked into Kayla's house and the door was closed behind them, she was all over Jack, in an aggressive, demanding way that initially caught him off guard.

This time, she had him pressed up against the nearest wall, her mouth wild and greedy on his as she pushed his coat from his shoulders and nearly ripped open the buttons on his shirt in her haste to get it off him. She flattened her palms on his chest, over his rigid nipples, then dragged her cool fingers all the way down to the waistband of his slacks. She slanted her mouth beneath his, taking the kiss to a deeper, more erotic level as her shaking hands worked to loosen his belt, then fumbled to unbutton his slacks.

Her movements were anxious and eager, with a frantic edge that went beyond passion and touched on a desperation that made him wonder at its source. She was attacking him as if she feared he'd change his mind about them. As if this was the last time they'd ever make love.

Neither worries were even a distinct possibility, and he sought to ease her reckless, frenzied actions because he intended for this night to last longer than the time it took for a quick release. And that's exactly where things were heading if they didn't take tonight at a more leisurely pace.

He gently captured her face in his hands and pulled her head back a few inches, so he could look into her eyes. The entryway was dark and shadowed, but there was no mistaking the flush on her cheeks and the barely concealed glimmer of emotion in her gaze. "Slow down, Kayla, sweetheart. I'm not going anywhere."

She gave her head a quick shake in what seemed too much like a denial. "I need you inside me."

"That's exactly where I want to be, too," he said, and slid his thumbs along her jawline in a tender, calming caress. "We'll get there, I promise."

Their last two sexual encounters had been frenzied and quick, with their clothes barely shoved out of the way. Tonight was too important to him and to their relationship to rush. This time he wanted them both naked, wanted to feel her skin against his, wanted to see and watch the way her body responded to the touch of his hands, the stroke of his mouth.

And mostly, he wanted to make love to her on a soft mattress, face-to-face, heartbeat to heartbeat. "Take me to your bedroom."

She hesitated, just long enough for him to decide to take matters into his own hands. Lacing his fingers through hers, he moved down the darkened hallway, past what appeared to be an office she'd set up at home, until he found her bedroom. He pulled her inside, then moved to turn on the lamp on the nightstand.

"Jack, don't."

The panic in her voice stopped him before he could flood the room with light. He wasn't surprised to hear her quivering demand, and told himself to be patient. He'd have to tackle one issue at a time with Kayla, no matter how badly he wanted to see her without a stitch of clothing on, all soft planes and luscious curves for him to gaze upon.

Tonight he'd have to be satisfied with stripping her completely naked by the light of a moonbeam streaming through the window. He'd give her that tonight, and tomorrow he'd tell Kayla he'd fallen in love with her. Slow, intimate steps designed to build her trust in him. To let her know that he wanted more than an affair with her, more than sex in the dark. He wanted a commitment, a future, and he wanted that with her. And that meant no hiding anything-not even her body.

"Come here," he said softly, and waited for her to join him by the edge of the bed, then pulled the pins from her hair and let the wavy tresses fall to her shoulders. "Now turn around so I can unzip your dress."

She did as he asked, and he brushed his lips along the side of her neck as he lowered the zipper down to her spine, then unhooked the clasp on her bra. He felt her shiver as he smoothed the sleeves of her dress down her arms, and pushed the rest of the material over her hips so it fell to the floor and out of his way.

He eased her back around again and grew excruciatingly hard at what he'd uncovered. Since he'd taken off her panties earlier, she stood before him in nothing but smoke-hued stockings that ended with a feminine band of lace at mid thigh. He took in the dark shadow between her legs, the swell of her hips silhouetted by moonlight, and the full breasts that balanced the shape of her body perfectly.

He reached out to touch her tense jaw. He could see in her eyes that, even in the darkness, she couldn't bring herself to shed her doubts about herself, about her lush body, which was his every fantasy come to life.

He smoothed his fingers along her jaw to her chin. "You have no reason to be uncomfortable with me, so let it go," he murmured gently. "Especially here and now."

Something shimmered in her eyes, the barest hint of hope, and much to his wonder her slight resistance faded. Without him asking, she scooted on top of the bed and lay there, silently waiting for him to join her.

After quickly removing his slacks and briefs, he sheathed himself with a condom, then moved to a position by her feet, determined to make this experience one she wouldn't soon forget. Grasping the lacy band hugging her thigh, he slowly, leisurely stripped off one stocking, then the other, letting his fingers trail sensuously along the back of her knee and over her smooth calves as he peeled away the silky fabric.

Then he began kissing his way upward, relying on his senses of taste and touch to make up for his lack of sight. He used the lazy glide of his hands, the damp heat of his mouth, and the soft stroke of his tongue to blaze a fiery trail along her parted thighs.

She said his name on a breathless, plaintive sigh and clutched the bedcovers in her fists when he finally pushed one finger, then two, deep inside her creamy center and put his mouth right where she needed the pressure of his tongue the most.

She came almost instantly, bucking against his mouth, and her moan of pleasure meshed with his as he took her higher still, until she begged him to please, please stop. He did, but only because he'd yet to skim his lips over the curve of her hip, the softness of her stomach. She writhed as he dipped his tongue into her navel, and her fingers tangled in his hair to urge him up.

He deliberately took his time, refusing to be rushed, and gradually made his way up to her voluptuous breasts. He laved her nipples, traced the swell of her cleavage with his tongue, and grazed the plump flesh with his teeth. She squirmed beneath him, whimpering fretfully.

Long minutes later, he kneed her thighs wider apart and moved over her so that his throbbing erection was nestled against the lips of her sex. Entwining their fingers, he pinned her hands at the side of her head. When they were finally face-to-face, heartbeat to heartbeat, then, and only then, did he thrust deep, stretching her, filling her, his penetration so powerful and complete that they both moaned simultaneously.

But still, it wasn't enough. "Wrap your legs high around my waist," he said.

She did, her thighs clasping his hips and her ankles locked at the base of his spine. The position caused her bottom to lift, her hips to tilt, and he buried himself to the very base of his shaft.

"Oh, yeah," he growled. He slowly ground against her as he trailed hot, openmouthed kisses along her jaw, her throat, and then gave her a love bite on her neck.

She sobbed in frustration, her body arching, straining against him, trying to urge him to a wilder rhythm. In his own sweet time he eventually gave her what she wanted, gradually surging faster, harder, deeper, until both of their bodies submitted to the inevitable… a glorious, stunning climax that drained them both.

As the tremors faded, he lowered his mouth to Kayla's and kissed her, their bodies still joined, and the beat of her heart matching his. He let go of her hands and touched her face, and everything within him went still as he felt something wet against his fingertips. Even without the lights on, he knew exactly what that moisture was, and all he could do was pray they were tears of joy, not regret.

Kayla woke up alone in her bed, but the sounds coming from the kitchen assured her that Jack was still there. Smiling drowsily and with more contentment than she could ever remember feeling, she stretched beneath the covers, completely naked and thoroughly sated-her body, heart and soul.

She sighed, remembering the way Jack had held her so intimately during the course of the night, never letting her stray very far before he'd pull her back against the heat of his body and snuggle close. Kayla had to admit that she loved the feel of his warm, strong arms around her, of having him cradle her as if he never wanted to let her go. And despite knowing that the morning could quite possibly bring heartache, she'd reveled in his attention and affection.

Because she loved him. Kayla swallowed hard as she forced herself to acknowledge the overwhelming, terrifying emotion she never expected to become a part of her affair with Jack. She'd set out to enjoy a sexual relationship, and to test her aphrodisiac candies on a hot, sexy guy. But in no way had she believed it could lead to something more.

Yes, she had. Kayla couldn't lie to herself anymore. The entire time she'd been intent on seducing Jack, she'd allowed herself to be seduced by him in return. Not just her body, but her emotions, as well.

Her heart squeezed tight in her chest. She had no one to blame but herself for letting her emotions become involved in her affair with Jack. Her candies might have spurred his lust and interest in her, but she knew without a doubt that they weren't responsible for the way she felt about him. Her emotions were real-too damn real-and while she ached for something more, he'd never promised her anything beyond what they'd shared. And since she'd gone into this relationship without any expectations, she had to leave it the same way.

A part of her had instinctively known all that last night, hence the tears that had fallen before she could stop them.

The sound of coffee percolating, followed by the tantalizing aroma drifting into her bedroom told her it was time to get up and moving. To get dressed and face the morning, and whatever it might bring.

While the coffee finished brewing, Jack searched the refrigerator for something to make for breakfast. First they'd eat, then they'd talk. They had a whole lot to discuss, and he figured it was better to do it on a full stomach, rather than an empty one.

After last night, telling Kayla how he felt about her seemed as natural as breathing. He hoped it would be just as easy for her to believe. He might not have told her verbally that he was in love with her, but there had been an undeniable emotional connection between them that should have left no doubt in her mind that he cared deeply about her.

He found eggs, bread to make some toast, and a half of a cantaloupe. Perfect. He set the items on the kitchen counter and pushed aside one of those gold boxes of candies that Kayla was always feeding him, along with a file folder that was in his way. A few of the papers slid out, and he automatically tucked them back inside the folder. The words written on the file tab caught his eye, and his attention: Aphrodisiac Candies.

Undeniably intrigued, he opened the folder. The lined papers were filled with handwritten recipes, all of which he recognized as the candies Kayla had been feeding him over the course of the past few weeks:

Heavenly Kisses, Love Bites, Chocolate Orgasms, and Caramel Caresses.

Frowning in confusion, he withdrew a package of a white powdery substance and read the information on the label, which included a statement that made him go very still inside: Aphrodisiac for lovers. An all-natural stimulant guaranteed to increase your sex drive and bring out the lust and passion in the one you desire.

He shook his head in stunned disbelief, certain he'd misread the fine print. Unfortunately, a second glance did nothing to change the meaning of the words on the package, and everything it implied.

He swore beneath his breath, more than a little upset at what he'd just discovered. Yes, Kayla had told him right up front that she wanted his opinion on the new line of candies she was considering for Pure Indulgence, and he'd actually enjoyed sampling her more erotic creations. But she obviously hadn't divulged her hidden agenda. He'd been nothing more than an experiment for her.

The evidence against her was glaring, and he held the proof of her deceit in his hands. While he hated thinking that everything they'd shared had all been part of some elaborate plan he couldn't help but hope there was some kind of logical explanation.

"Good morning."

Kayla's soft morning voice pulled him out of his turbulent thoughts, and he turned around to face her. She stood just inside the kitchen doorway, her hair slightly tousled, her skin flushed from a night of great sex, and she was wearing a silky robe that made her look extremely sensual and damn appealing. If he hadn't discovered this incriminating evidence, which definitely required an immediate explanation, he would have stripped off that flimsy garment and made love to her again this morning, right here in the damn kitchen.

But he wasn't about to allow anything to distract him from finding out the truth about those candies she'd been feeding him.

"Morning," he replied evenly. Forgetting about his breakfast plans, he indicated the open folder on the counter that revealed her secret recipes. "What's this?"

She sucked in a startled breath, her eyes widening with a glimmer of panic.

"I…" She shifted on her feet, swallowed hard, and tried again. "Umm, those are the recipes for the new line of candies I'm considering for Pure Indulgence."

"I gathered as much," he said, unable to keep the wry tone out of his voice, which was a helluva lot tamer than the anger welling inside him. "I've been lucky enough to have sampled each one of these candies. But it's not the candies I'm questioning, but rather what you've been putting in them. According to these recipes, it appears you've come up with some very interesting concoctions. And I'm assuming you fed them to me as some sort of experiment?" The thought made his stomach cramp.

She winced, obviously knowing exactly what he was referring to. But to her credit, she didn't lie or try to play dumb like most of the women he'd known would have attempted to do.

"Yes," she whispered, looking mortified. "I wanted to know if that aphrodisiac I bought really worked, so I asked you to eat the candies so I could gauge your reaction to the sexual stimulant."

He couldn't believe what he was hearing. Couldn't comprehend the possibility that she believed in such ridiculous nonsense. "And what kind of conclusion did you come to with these candies and my reaction to them, Kayla?" he asked, curious to know what she thought she'd accomplished.

She glanced away from his intense stare, her fingers toying anxiously with the hem of her robe. "You were definitely seduced by the candies and what was in them."

He crossed his arms over his chest, not caring for where the direction of this conversation was heading, or what she was insinuating. "No, I was seduced by you," he replied succinctly.

"You might think that's true," she said softly, an aching vulnerability lacing her voice, "but, in all honesty, it was most likely the aphrodisiac that, well, prompted your response to me."

"Look at me," he ordered. Even from across the room he wanted her to look in his eyes and see the truth for herself. Once her gaze tentatively met his again, he said in a steady tone, "I was not at all influenced by your candies."

"I know it might be hard for you to believe, but it's true." Her chin lifted a mutinous notch. "Those candies are responsible for every time we've been together sexually."

Frustration rode him hard. Good God, she wasn't serious, was she? But one look at her adamant expression and he knew that she truly believed her candies were the reason he'd made love to her those times. "Give me enough credit to know the difference between real passion and fabricated lust, and I resent the fact that you think I need some kind of sexual stimulant to want you."

She didn't back down from her claim. "The first time we kissed was right after you'd eaten a few Heavenly Kisses," she said, ticking off with her fingers. "Then you ate the Love Bites the night you cooked dinner for me here and we ended up having sex at the kitchen table. But the most telling proof I have of those candies and the power they have to induce lust and desire is the time I sent you the Chocolate Orgasms at your restaurant. Do you remember what happened?"

"Jesus, Kayla, how could I forget?" He shoved his fingers through his hair impatiently, wondering if there was any way to convince her that his desire for her was real, and always had been, and had absolutely nothing to do with her enhanced desserts. "After eating those Chocolate Orgasms I wanted you in the worst way, but not because of some kind of stimulant. I wanted you because while I was eating those candies I was thinking of you and what we'd done together the night before, and it turned me on. You turn me on."

"Then how do you explain all the times when we could have had sex and didn't, and each one of those times you didn't eat any of my aphrodisiac candies?"

He wanted to howl in frustration. He wanted to shake some sense into her. "It was nothing more than a coincidence."

She shook her head sadly, as if she wished that were true. "No, it wasn't. I've felt the reaction of those candies."

"Have you really?" he drawled incredulously. "And what, exactly, have you felt?"

"Warm. Tingly. Amorous." She shrugged her shoulders, causing that silky material to shift and slide over her full, generous breasts. "It happens every time I eat those candies."

He still wasn't buying it. He just couldn't suspend his disbelief that way… until it dawned on him why she was clinging so steadfastly to her claim that those candies were responsible for him wanting her. Because she couldn't bring herself to believe that he was sexually attracted to her on his own.

Her past with her mother and Doug had instilled her with the impression that without a slim, svelte body no man would give her a second glance. And those deeply rooted insecurities had prompted her to create her candies, and to believe in their power of persuasion when it came to his desire for her.

Those candies also protected her emotions, he realized. In her mind, when their affair ended, instead of facing the kind of rejection her mother and Doug had put her through, she could cling to the excuse that the aphrodisiac was the reason he'd lusted after her. And without those candies, his desire had waned.

He understood her motives, maybe better than she did. But he hated that she couldn't believe that he wanted her for who and what she was beyond surface appearance.

He figured there was only one way to convince her that those laced candies didn't have a friggin' thing to do with him wanting her. His feelings for her were as real as he was flesh and blood, and she was about to discover that for herself. In this case, his actions would speak louder than the words she didn't want to listen to.

He moved across the room toward her… slowly and easily, because she'd suddenly turned wary as he approached. "Since you've used me as your guinea pig the past few weeks, I'm going to conduct a little experiment of my own, and I expect your full cooperation in return."

Uncertainty shone in her eyes, but she didn't refuse him. "All right."

"Take note. I haven't had any candies this morning," he said, then slid his fingers to the back of her head and brought her mouth to his.

She initially stiffened, apparently not sure what his intentions were. He kissed her slowly at first, then gradually drew her into a deeper, hotter melding of lips and tongues that made her moan low in her throat. He felt her posture soften along with her mouth and used that opportunity to slip an arm around her back and bring her body flush to his. He cupped her breast in his hand, found her nipple through the silk of her robe and lightly pinched the taut tip.

Her breathing deepened, and so did his. Still kissing her, he smoothed his palm over her bottom then trailed his fingers up her thigh, beneath the hem of her robe, until he encountered the damp heat of her desire for him.

She shuddered in his arms, a soft whimper of need escaping her lips.

Now it was her turn to feel his passion, too.

Grasping one of her wrists, he eased her hand between their bodies and molded her fingers over the fierce erection straining against the fly of his slacks. There was no denying how she affected him physically, that his response was as real as it got. And if this wasn't enough proof for her, then he didn't know what else to do.

He lifted his mouth from hers, still holding her hand against his aching shaft, and stared into her dark green eyes. "This has nothing to do with any goddamn aphrodisiac, Kayla," he said, his tone rough with arousal. "It has everything to do with you, the woman I've fallen in love with."

She inhaled a quick, startled gasp of astonishment, seemingly rendered speechless by his declaration.

He hadn't meant for the words to come out that way, in the middle of a heated argument. But there was no better time to set her straight about how he felt about her, and so he just went with the moment and what was in his heart.

"That's right, Kayla," he said, softer now. "I'm in love with you. And I thought that you felt something for me, too."

"Oh, God… I do."

"Do you?" He couldn't read her expression, not enough to assure him of her true emotions. "Are you sure it's real and not the candies making you feel and think that way?"

He was mocking her, tossing back her own theory about her aphrodisiac candies. And she was confused enough not to answer his question, which told him she still had to come to terms with her insecurities and emotions before they could take this relationship any further.

But before he left, there were a few things he still needed to say and wanted her to hear. He let her go, then took a step back, putting distance between them again.

"I just showed you what you do to me without any kind of stimulant, and now you know that I'm in love with you. When I look at you I see a beautiful, sensual woman who has so much to give, emotionally and physically… if only you'd have faith in yourself."

He steeled himself against the tears welling in her eyes, the fear and panic he saw there that wrenched at his heart. "I want a future with you. I want your body, your mind and your heart. I want the whole package. You are who you are, Kayla, but you have to trust that my feelings are genuine, and not a fabrication of some kind of bizarre aphrodisiac. And when you can do that, then you know where to find me."

He walked out of the kitchen while he still had the will to do so and quickly gathered up his things. Minutes later he was gone, knowing there was a good chance he'd just lost the only woman he'd ever truly loved.