Sierra City

Jessie's own chest heaved, her body throbbing with need as she pressed against Chris. Had it ever felt like this? Had she ever wanted to scream in pleasure as someone touched her? Had she ever wanted to give pleasure? No, it was just a means to an end. But this was different. The thought of Chris touching her, making love to her because she wanted to make love to her, was almost more than she could bear. She dipped her head lazily and lightly kissed Chris's breast, her tongue coming out to tease a nipple.

"Jessie," Chris whispered. "The bedroom."

Jessie pulled away, her eyes clouded with desire as she took Chris's hand and led her silently into the bedroom. Chris pulled Jessie's top off with ease and her hands lightly brushed her nipples through her bra before removing that as well.

They shed their jeans quickly, then Jessie pulled Chris after her, feeling her weight settle on top of her aroused body. She wanted Chris to hurry. She wanted her to take her now, quickly. But Chris simply touched her, hands moving lightly over her stomach then up, brushing her nipples, making her want Chris even more.

"Chris, please. Touch me," she whispered.

Chris had a brief flash to the other time Jessie had begged her to touch her, but she knew it would be different this time. Her hand slid slowly down Jessie's body, feeling her tremble at her touch. She dipped her head and took Jessie's nipple into her mouth, suddenly hungry for her, not wanting to wait any longer.

Jessie arched and held Chris's head to her breast, waiting as Chris's hand parted her legs.

Chris found her wetness and moved slowly into it, moaning against the breast in her mouth as Jessie whimpered softly against her head.

"Oh, yes," Jessie breathed and her hips moved to meet Chris's fingers. "God, Chris, please, I want your mouth on me," she whispered.

"Yes. I want that, too."

Chris left her breast and kissed her smooth belly before settling between her thighs. She nudged them farther apart, then cupped her rounded hips, letting her tongue move over her thighs, teasing.

"Please," Jessie begged and her hips rose, searching for Chris's mouth.

Chris breathed deeply, savoring her scent, and she closed her eyes and touched her, her mouth opening over her, her tongue diving into her wetness.

"God, yes," Jessie whispered. Her hips moved, meeting Chris's plunging tongue as it moved within her.

All gentleness gone, Chris wanted to devour Jessie and her lips sucked hungrily at her, her shoulders pushing Jessie's legs farther apart, higher on her shoulders and she took Jessie into her mouth, her face covered in her wetness. Her tongue stroked her swollen clit and Jessie wrapped her legs around Chris and held her to her, her hips rising again to press Chris more firmly against her. Chris felt the trembling under her mouth as Jessie's legs tightened around her head.

Jessie exploded, her eyes shut tight against the blinding flash that consumed her, and she felt herself pulse into Chris's mouth as she continued to stroke her. Wave after wave washed over her, and she screamed out with pleasure, nearly embarrassed by the sounds that came from her throat. Finally, her legs fell limply to the bed and she was too spent to even hold Chris to her.

"Dear God in heaven," she whispered. "I knew it would be like that with you."

Chris lay beside her, resting on her side as she took Jessie's hand and kissed her palm gently. Yes, she had known it, too.

Jessie rolled over onto her elbow and touched Chris's face with her fingertips.

"I want to make love to you that way. I want to know what you taste like."

"I don't know if I could stand it," Chris said with a gentle smile. "I feel like a teenager around you."

"Hush, lie back," Jessie whispered.

Chris rolled onto her back, eyes closed as she waited for Jessie's mouth to touch her. She was surprised when soft lips touched her own, gently moving against her. She opened to them, inviting Jessie's tongue into her mouth. Warm hands cupped her breasts and she moved into them, loving the feel of Jessie's hands on her. Jessie's mouth took her nipple and her teeth gently nipped at her and Chris moaned low in her throat, her legs parting even before Jessie's hand moved to her.

"You're so wet," Jessie murmured into her breast. "I can't wait to taste you," she said and she moved down her body, teasing Chris, letting her tongue wet her inner thighs. But she didn't tease long. Chris shoved at her shoulders, urging her to hurry and Jessie gathered Chris's thighs around her and lowered her mouth to her wetness.

They moaned together as Jessie covered her and Chris grasped at the sheets, her fists pulling them from their moorings as she surged up to meet Jessie, her hips rising off the bed.

Jessie's tongue licked at her, stroking her fast, but she felt Chris nearing orgasm and she pulled back. She wasn't nearly ready for it to end. She heard Chris whimper, and she went back to her, her tongue delving inside her warmth, her mouth covering her again. She slowed, wanting it to last, but Chris grasped her head, holding her hard against her and Jessie's tongue moved over her quickly, feeling Chris swell inside her mouth. When Chris arched her hips, Jessie sucked her swollen clit inside her mouth, her tongue taking her at last, feeling Chris's release as she pulsed against her mouth, as she cried out into the night.

Arms wrapped together as Jessie covered Chris with her body, feeling her heart beating wildly in her chest.

Chris was afraid to speak, so she lay with her eyes closed, holding Jessie to her as she drifted off to sleep, exhausted.

Chapter Thirty-three

Jessie stirred as she felt Chris pull out of her arms. She rolled over, noting that the sun was already shining into the window. It did nothing to warm the room, though. She had forgotten to turn on the heater last night and now the early morning chill surrounded them.

"Where are you going?" she asked sleepily, reaching out to touch Chris's bare back as she sat on the edge of the bed.

"Busy day."

"Chris?"

"Yeah?"

"Do we need to talk?" Jessie asked. She sat up, too, moving behind Chris and wrapping her arms around her. Her nipples hardened as she pressed her breasts against Chris's back. She closed her eyes and sighed, the lingering scent of their lovemaking arousing her again, like it had done a few hours earlier.

Chris squeezed her eyes shut, wanting nothing more than to lie back down with Jessie and make love to her once again. But in the light of day, reality showed its face, and she felt her fears surface.

"Talk to me," Jessie whispered. "Please don't just leave."

"Last night was... beyond words, really," Chris finally said. "When you left this summer, I thought about you a lot. I thought about making love with you. I wanted to make love with you. But when you came back, I was afraid to be near you. I was so afraid that if we tried, it would end up like that last time and I couldn't do that again. That's not how I wanted it to be with us."

Jessie pulled back a little, but her hands continued to rub slowly across Chris's back.

"It won't ever be like that again. Chris, I'm sorry about that night, but there is nothing I can do to change it. Not now. You know, I thought about you, too, while I was gone. But when I thought about you, about us, it wasn't that last night together that I remembered. It was the night we went camping. It was just the two of us. It was all so innocent and for the first time in my life, I wanted to make love with someone. There was no agenda, no games being played in a bar, no need to have unsatisfying sex with a stranger, no underlying need to hurt," she finished in a whisper. "It was just us and when you kissed me, for the first time in my life, I felt an attraction to someone that was so strong, I was ready to forget everything about myself and just... make love."

Chris turned around to face Jessie, seeing the glistening of tears in her eyes.

"I don't know what you want from me," Chris said softly. "I'm scared. I mean, you're here for at least a month. If we spend that time being more than friends, being intimate with each other, then when you leave, I don't think I'll be able to just dismiss it as a summer fling, Jessie. I'm too old for one-night stands."

"Why does everything have to be so complicated?" Jessie reached up and lightly ran her fingertip over Chris's eyebrows then across her cheek. "I just want a chance," Jessie whispered.

"A chance at what?"

"A chance at a normal relationship," she stated. "I don't know how, McKenna. All these years, there's just been one person after another." She felt tears prick her eyes again, but she held Chris's gaze steadily. "So many, I couldn't even begin to count. And I couldn't tell you one of their names. Then I met you up there one day," she said, motioning out the window with her head. "And I liked you. I mean, I liked you as a person. And that scared me," she said with a smile. "I never like anybody. But I'll admit, I wanted to play my little game with you, see how long it would take... but I liked you. And it mattered what you thought of me. That's why I curse myself for using you that night, for lumping you in with all the others. But in my eyes, it wasn't you anymore. You were just a woman that would make me forget everything. And I desperately needed to forget everything that night."

"I'm sorry," Chris said quietly.

But Jessie smiled.

"I'm apologizing to you, McKenna. You're not supposed to say you're sorry. I am."

"Okay." Chris nodded and leaned over to kiss Jessie lightly.

"Thank you. And thank you for last night. It was a first for me, by the way."

"A first?"

"A first to invite someone to my home, to my bed. A first to wake up with someone in my arms," Jessie said shyly. "I liked it."

"Well, you want to try for two nights?"

"Two nights, McKenna? Won't Dillon disown you?"

"Shit! I forgot about him. He probably froze his ass off last night," she said as she stood. "I better get going, anyway. We have a lot of trails to mark today."

Jessie watched as Chris walked naked to the heater and turned it on before bending to retrieve her jeans from the floor. Jessie left the warmth of the covers and walked to Chris, her hands moving over Chris's exposed breasts. She couldn't stop herself as she lowered her mouth to capture an aroused nipple.

"Jessie... oh," Chris breathed, her hands leaving the jeans undone as they roamed over Jessie's naked back before settling over her hips. She pulled Jessie close against her, hearing the low moan come from Jessie. When Jessie raised her head, Chris found her mouth, kissing her hard before pushing her away. If they didn't stop now, they never would.

"Do you have any idea how much I want you?" Jessie asked, but she turned away from Chris and grabbed her robe. "I'm not used to this, McKenna. Sorry."

"Don't be sorry for wanting me. I'm sorry I have to leave."

"How about if we cook something at your place tonight?" Jessie asked as she tied her robe tightly around herself and followed Chris into the living room. She was unusually nervous, she realized. As she had said, she wasn't used to this.

Chris slipped the sweatshirt over her head and tried to tame her hair by running impatient fingers through it. She looked at Jessie, who stood in her bare feet waiting for her answer. Then she smiled and walked closer, taking Jessie's hands in her own.

"You know, Jessie, I'm not exactly used to this either. I'm not sure how I'm supposed to act this morning... but last night was incredible. And I definitely would love to repeat it often," she said before touching her lips lightly to Jessie's. "And I wish like hell I didn't have to leave this morning," she murmured against Jessie's lips as their kiss deepened.

Jessie finally stepped away when she realized she was on the verge of begging Chris to stay. And that, she was definitely not used to.

"I'll tell you what," Chris said. "I'll leave the back door unlocked. You can go over whenever you want, if you feel like cooking. I'll try to make it an early day," she said.

"So, I have free range of your kitchen?"

"Yes. But you've also seen what my fridge has to offer, so..."

"I'll bring the food, McKenna."

"Good. I'll see you soon."

Chapter Thirty-four

Chris listened to her messages while she drove the short distance to her own cabin. Two from Roger. The first reminding her that they were marking trails today and the second demanding to know where the hell she was. The third was from Bobby, wondering if they needed to send out SAR for her.

"Very funny," she said out loud. But she needed to hurry. It was already after nine.

Her cabin was frigid, and she ignored the nearly screaming Dillon while she started the heater in the bedroom.

"I'm sorry, okay, but I forgot about you," she told him. He followed her into the kitchen and watched as she filled his food bowl, then flipped his tail and walked away without touching it. "Spoiled brat," she called after him.

She hurried through her shower, then changed clothes twice before leaving. The sky had been nearly cloudless when she left Jessie's. Now, the clouds covered the sun, and the temperature was still in the low twenties. Silk longjohns went under her jeans, and she put an extra layer under her sweater, too.

She called Roger as soon as she left her cabin. She was hoping to avoid his questions until later, but she didn't know if she needed to go to the ranger station or just meet Matt out on the trails.

"Where the hell were you?" Roger demanded. "Bobby was ready to send out a search."

"You know, I have a life, too, Roger. I'm sorry I didn't check in with you first."

"It's damn near ten o'clock, McKenna," he pointed out.

"I'm sorry. Something... came up," she said lamely.

"Dinner at Annie's last night? What, is she getting to be too much for you?"

Chris was tempted to just tell him the truth, but she didn't know if Jessie was ready for that. For that matter, she wasn't sure she was, either.

"Look, is Matt already out? Should I just meet him somewhere?"

"He and Greg are out doing Ridge Trail. I sent Hatcher out with Bobby to finish up the South Rim."

"Hatcher? Good God, no wonder there's a storm coming," she said.

"Yeah. I'm sure he's plenty pissed at you."

"About damn time he does some field work."

"Well, you'll be happy to know he's asked for a transfer. Apparently, cold weather is not his thing. He's requested Florida."

"Well, good for him. Maybe his daddy can put him on a boat to patrol the Keys or something. I'll be there in a second, Roger."

She hung up without waiting for his response and tossed the phone between the seats. The first flakes were falling by the time she got to the ranger station. A day early.

"What's with the snow?" she asked Roger when she walked in.

"Oh, they gave me some meteorological bullshit about the jet stream dropping and pulling in moisture from somewhere. All their damn computers, and they miss the storm by a day."

She followed him into his office after accepting a cup of coffee from Kay.

"The mountain will be crawling with skiers tomorrow and Sunday," he said. "You're late," he stated as an afterthought. "You're never late."

"I was... busy."

"Busy? My God, McKenna, you're blushing. Get lucky?" Then he lowered his voice. "I hope it wasn't a local, McKenna. Can you imagine the scandal?"

Chris rolled her eyes. A local?

"Want to tell me about it?"

"No."

"Come on," he coaxed. "I always tell you."

"About you and Ellen? Please, I don't need details."

"Jessie?" he guessed.

Chris tried to remain expressionless, but she felt the blush creep up her face. The automatic smile gave her away.

"I'll be damned. Well, come on, out with it. I want details," he teased.

"Roger, please, it just... happened."

"Sure it did. Does Annie know?"

"No! Of course not."

Roger grinned.

"Well, she called here this morning and invited us over for Thanksgiving dinner. When I mentioned that you weren't in yet, she said that you and Jessie had left together last night," he said, still grinning. "She also said that you two had stood outside talking for a very long time. She couldn't quite see through the window, though, to see what was going on."

Chris gave him a humorless smile.

"Are you enjoying yourself?" she asked.

"Very much." Then he laughed. "Damn, McKenna, you're too old to be making out in front of someone's house."

"We were not making out," she hissed. "We were... talking. And then we decided to talk some more at her place. And I fell asleep," she finished. Then she laughed, too. "Roger, please don't tease me about this. I really... like her."

Roger leaned back in his chair, a satisfied grin on his face as he watched her.

"Okay, McKenna, I won't tease you." Then he leaned forward again. "Do you want to tell me what's going on?"

"No, I don't." At his hurt expression, she softened her words. "I'm not really sure what's going on, Roger. I mean, she's probably going back to New York within the month."

She felt the impact of her words, and her chest tightened. Back to New York. Out of her life again. And maybe this time for good. She met his questioning eyes across from her, wondering how much he suspected. He was no fool and she was never very good at hiding her feelings. She was very close to falling in love with Jessie, and she realized she was powerless to stop it.

She spent the rest of the morning putting out trail markers along the Lake Trail. She would mark Elk Meadow in the afternoon. They were the two most heavily used trails for cross-country skiing in their area, although the South Rim got a lot of traffic, too, especially early in the season when the snow level wasn't down to the lower elevations yet.

She worked quickly, trying to beat the storm, but it was slow going in the cold and wind. She had to take her gloves off each time she placed a marker, and her hands were frozen by the time she finished the loop around the lake.

She was sitting in her Jeep trying to get warm when Roger radioed her.

"McKenna, what's your ten-twenty?"

"Lake Trail. Just finished," she replied.

"Come get me," he said. "I'll help you mark Elk Meadow. Just heard from Matt up on Ridge Trail. They've had two inches in the last hour, probably four since this morning."

"Ten-four."

Roger was waiting as she pulled up, the hood of his parka pulled up to cut the wind.

"Damn, McKenna, that wind is a bitch," he said as he crawled inside.

"No shit. My hands are still frozen."

"Well, it's a quick mover. Should be over by tonight. Nice and sunny tomorrow or so the experts say."

"How much snow?" she asked.

"Ten to twelve up on the mountain. There's another low pressure system off of Alaska. We need to watch that one," he told her.

"You sound like a damn meteorologist, Roger."

"Yeah. And I can probably predict the weather just as good as they do."

With both of them, they made quick work of Elk Meadow, but it was snowing heavily by the time they finished. They sat in the Jeep, hands held to the heater as they tried to warm up.

"Want to stop by the Rock? They'll have a roaring fire going," Roger offered.

"Can't."

"Plans?"

Chris grinned and nodded. She had done a pretty good job of keeping thoughts of Jessie at bay, but now she let them in and the memory of last night nearly overwhelmed her. She felt the heat down to the tips of her toes.

"Be careful, McKenna."

"What do you mean?" she asked cautiously.

"This one could be a heartbreaker."

She nodded. Yes, she knew that already.

Chapter Thirty-Five

Chris was surprised to see smoke coming from her chimney when she drove up. She was suddenly nervous, knowing Jessie was inside.

Jessie was standing with her back to the fire, waiting. Their eyes met across the room and identical smiles touched their faces.

"Hey."

"Hi."

"Nice and toasty in here," Chris said as she moved to the fire to join Jessie.

"Yes. I've made Dillon quite happy, I think," Jessie said, motioning to the cat who was curled up contentedly on the sofa. He opened one eye and scowled at Chris before closing it again.

"I see he's still pissed at me."

They were quiet and Chris let her eyes travel around the room, noting that the table was set for dinner, wine already opened and ready. She finally let her eyes rest on the anxious ones of Jessie, trying to read them, but they were guarded, probably much like her own.

"Did you have a busy day?" Jessie finally asked.

"Yes. And cold. The snow's coming down pretty good now. Should be great skiing this weekend."

"I guess there will be a lot of people in town, at the lodge," Jessie added.

Chris nodded, wondering why they were having this inane conversation, knowing it wasn't what either of them wanted to talk about. She sighed, not knowing where to start.

"McKenna, why don't you get a shower," Jessie suggested, wrinkling up her nose.

"And what are you saying?" Chris asked with a grin. "I stink?"

But Jessie had moved to the kitchen, making a pretense of checking on dinner. Chris left her without another word, wondering why the conversation seemed so strained between them. If she wasn't so damn hungry, she would drag Jessie into the bedroom and strip her naked. That was really want she wanted to do. But, probably uncivilized, she thought. Then she grinned. Dinner first, then bed.

She lingered in the shower. The hot water felt too good after being cold all day long. She slipped on baggy sweatpants and a long-sleeved T-shirt, donning only thick socks for her feet.

Jessie was again waiting by the fire, this time with a glass of wine. She motioned with her head to the table and Chris picked up her own glass before walking over. She stopped just short of Jessie, then took the remaining step to her, slowly bending her head and kissing the lips she had tried so hard not to think about all day.

Jessie closed her eyes and sighed, savoring their first kiss. She wasn't sure how to greet Chris, what Chris expected of her, so she did nothing. She was oddly disappointed when Chris arrived and did nothing as well. She didn't want to take the time for small talk and dinner. She only wanted what they'd shared last night. After a lifetime of one-night stands, she was nearly insatiable for Chris's gentle, tender lovemaking.

"Okay?"

"For now." Jessie nodded. "Are you hungry?"

"Are we talking about food?"

"We're talking about anything you want."

Chris raised an eyebrow.

"Is dinner ready?"

"It can be. Or we can turn the oven off," Jessie suggested.

Chris leaned over and touched her lips, this time lingering, her tongue licking off the trace of wine on Jessie's lips. Jessie's mouth opened, capturing Chris's tongue and sucking it into her mouth. That was all the encouragement Chris needed. She blindly set her wineglass on the mantel, taking Jessie into her arms and holding her tight against her.

"Chris, please," Jessie whispered into her mouth. Her hands moved under Chris's shirt, touching warm skin before moving to her breasts, lightly raking her fingers over taut nipples.

"I vote we turn the oven off," Chris said, her voice husky with desire. She took Jessie's hand and led her to the bedroom, pausing at the oven on their way.

They stood in the darkness of the bedroom, listening to each other draw breath. Chris reached out slowly and touched Jessie's cheek, lightly running her fingertips across her skin, trying to memorize every line.

"You're so beautiful," Chris whispered. "Before I met you, I used to stare at your picture, wondering what you would feel like, what your lips would taste like," she confessed. "You looked so sad."

"I was. I was dead inside. There was no joy in my life. I never thought I could feel this way. I never thought someone could touch me the way you do," Jessie said quietly. She reached for Chris, pulling her mouth to her own. Their gentle kiss turned hungry, and she slipped her tongue into Chris's mouth, swallowing the moan that followed. They broke apart long enough to shed their shirts, then mouths reunited as their breasts pressed together.

Chris pulled her to the bed, not bothering with the covers and Jessie settled her weight between Chris's opened thighs, pressing hard into her.

"This was the longest day of my life," Jessie whispered. Her mouth moved wetly down Chris's throat, stopping only when her lips closed over an erect nipple.

Chris arched into her, her hands cupping Jessie's hips and pulling her more firmly against her. She rolled her head back, eyes closed tightly as Jessie feasted. Crazily, she wondered how she had ever lived without this. A low moan escaped as Jessie moved to her other breast and she moved her hands lightly across Jessie's bare back before clutching her head and holding her closer against her breast. She felt Jessie take more of her breast inside and she moaned again, her hips rising again to meet Jessie's thrusts as she ground into her.

Jessie's hand slipped easily inside Chris's sweatpants and she found what she wanted. Hot wetness surrounded her fingers, and she drove them deep inside Chris, feeling her tighten around them. Oh, so wet, she thought. She wanted her mouth there but Chris's hips rose again to meet her thrusting fingers. Instead, her mouth found Chris's waiting lips, her tongue mimicking her fingers as she plunged harder and harder inside Chris, riding the wave with Chris as her hips bucked against her hand.

Chris's hips moved frantically as she met each thrust of Jessie's fingers, driving them harder into her until she simply exploded under Jessie's weight. Her scream was primal, long and hard, and she clutched Jessie to her as her tremors subsided.

Jessie felt the perspiration cool on her back as she rested against Chris, her breath still coming hard as the needs of her own body clamored to be heard. She reached down and unbuttoned her own jeans, shoving them haphazardly down her legs as she pulled Chris's sweats completely off. Cotton briefs followed and she pressed her naked body to Chris, hips grinding hard against Chris as she sought her own release.

"Let me, sweetheart," Chris whispered and her hand moved between them. She was nearly overwhelmed by the wetness she found and her fingers moved into hot fire, stroking the swollen center quickly as Jessie's hips moved against her.

It only took one touch and Jessie felt herself slipping, tumbling over the edge quickly. She came hard and fast, her cry loud to her own ears as she lay spent on top of Chris.

"I'm sorry," Jessie whispered when she found her breath. "I couldn't wait."

"Please don't tell me you're sorry. That was beautiful." She kissed Jessie's damp forehead. "We've got all the time in the world."

"There'll never be enough time," Jessie said softly as she curled next to Chris. "I could make love with you every day for the rest of my life... and it still wouldn't be enough."

Chris took a sharp breath. Those words, she was not expecting. Unconsciously, she tightened her arms.

"You know, I was a little nervous about tonight," Chris confessed. "I didn't know if last night could be repeated or if you would even want to."

"I wanted you to walk in that door tonight and drag me off to the bedroom without a single word spoken," Jessie said lightly. She stroked the smooth skin on Chris's belly, wondering at her sudden need to talk, to share her feelings... and her doubts. "Can I tell you something, Chris?"

"Of course."

"You're the first person that I've ever been with twice." She looked up, just able to see the expression on Chris's face in the darkness. It was one of sadness. "You're also the first person who's ever made love to me because they truly wanted to. It wasn't just sex. And you're the first one I've ever made love to," she finished in a whisper. "What I'm feeling is so completely new to me, I'm not sure what to call it." She swallowed hard before continuing. "I don't know what love is, Chris. But what I feel when I'm with you is complete happiness, contentment, joy. And passion. Passion I didn't even know I had. And not just when we're like this, touching. Sometimes I look into your blue eyes, and I just want to go there, go inside you, let you surround me and protect me. And I know you would. You've been the one person I could count on, the one person who hasn't let me down."

Chris quietly rubbed Jessie's back while she spoke, her words touching Chris in places no one had been before. Her heart ached for this woman who had so much pain in her life. And so little love.

"Jessie, I'll always be someone you can count on. No matter what happens here or what happens when you leave, if you need me, you just say the word."

"Why, Chris? Why would you do that?" Jessie pulled away, trying so hard to read Chris's eyes.

"Because I..." Fm in love with you. Chris's throat closed completely, stifling the words that threatened to spill out. In love? "I care about you, Jessie. What happens to you matters to me."

Chapter Thirty-Six

The pasta casserole was great for a midnight snack, which was when they finally managed to get out of bed. Chris ate quietly as she watched Jessie moving around her kitchen, refilling her wineglass as she passed by.

"Why are you watching me?" Jessie asked, her back still to Chris.

"Can't I watch you?"

Jessie wanted to tell Chris she could watch her for the rest of her life, but she didn't want to scare her off. She suspected she had already disrupted Chris's orderly life with her timid declaration earlier. Not a declaration of love, exactly. That was still a foreign concept to her. But she knew what she felt for Chris was not simply sexual attraction. Chris had come into her life and captured her very soul. But was that love? She turned around and found Chris still watching her. She met those blue eyes head on, searching for what, she wasn't sure. Love? Did Chris's feelings for her go deeper than this physical attraction? With Chris, it was hard to tell. She was affectionate in so many ways with so many different people, it was hard for Jessie to tell if her feelings ran deeper. Oh, but when they made love, the way Chris touched her, surely...

"Jessie?"

Jessie blinked, focusing again on the blue eyes staring at her. Chris arched an eyebrow.

"Sorry, McKenna. I guess I spaced out."

"Is everything okay? I mean, do you want to talk?"

"No, no, I'm fine. I was just thinking." She grinned as she sat down at the table and resumed her dinner. "I guess I'm tired. We haven't exactly gotten much sleep in the last few days."

"We can sleep in today," Chris offered.

"Well, I promised Annie I would take her to Sacramento. She wants to shop for Thanksgiving. That is, if the roads are clear."

"They should be. It stopped snowing." Chris shoved her plate away and sat with her wineglass in front of her. "You know, Jessie, I'm really glad you and Annie are taking the time to get to know one another again. I was afraid you would come here and talk to her and leave again, and just go on about your life. I'm glad you're letting Annie into your life."

"Maybe that was my intention, originally. I don't know. Honestly, I never really had a plan, McKenna." Then she laughed a little. "I never have a plan when it comes to my life."

Chapter Thirty-seven

Chris's boots crunched across the snow on the sidewalk and she scraped them off before going into the ranger station. The roads were clear and traffic was heading into tiny Sierra City. The weather was perfect for skiing and the lodge was packed when she drove past earlier. She glanced at her watch. Nearly noon. Jessie and Annie were probably on their way to Sacramento by now. She had talked to Annie on the phone, who sounded as excited as Chris had ever heard her. The meal she was planning for Thanksgiving would feed twenty, Chris was sure.

"I'm going to ask Jessie to take me to dinner at one of those fancy restaurants, Chris. It's been years since I've dined out. Oh, and we're going to the mall, too. I can't remember the last time I shopped for new clothes."

They would be back late, Chris knew. She was disappointed she wouldn't get to spend the evening with Jessie, but she was glad Annie was getting to spend this time alone with her.

"Hey, McKenna," Roger greeted her when she stuck her head in his office. "Didn't expect to see you today."

Chris shrugged. Her cabin was lonely.

"Thought I'd help out. I see Hatcher's being tour guide," she said, motioning with her head to the group of skiers Robert Hatcher was talking to.

"You know, McKenna, he probably likes you even less than you like him. What's up with that? I don't think I've ever seen you two even have a conversation before."

"He's useless. He's lazy. And he thinks he's God's gift to women."

Roger smiled. "He hit on you, didn't he?"

"Yes, he did. First time we met. When I turned him down, he called me a fucking dyke. I was forced to agree with him," she said with a grin.

"Hey, McKenna, just the woman I need to see."

Chris turned at Mart's greeting, offering him a smile.

"Hi, Matt. What's up?"

"Can I talk to you a minute?" He glanced at Roger. "Privately?"

"Sure. I'll talk to you later, Roger."

She followed Matt down the short hallway to the makeshift kitchen in the back. Matt glanced back down the hallway before closing the door.

"What the hell's going on?" she asked and she perched on the edge of the table, crossing her feet at the ankles. "Secret?"

"Sort of. I finally invited Donna to dinner. Last night. We had a great time," he said.

"What did you cook?" she asked.

"It doesn't matter, McKenna," he said impatiently. "That's not what I want to talk to you about."

"Well, was it at least nice? It wasn't hamburgers, was it?"

"I got one of those frozen lasagna dinners at Ellen's. Garlic bread and a salad."

"Wine?"

"Beer."

"Beer? Matt, you served beer with lasagna for your romantic dinner? I thought I taught you better," she teased.

"Will you stop with the menu already?"

"Okay, I'm sorry. What's on your mind?"

"I kissed her."

Chris grinned and playfully punched his arm.

"Well, way to go, man. And?"

"And I think it surprised the hell out of her. But, well, it was just the one and it's not like she slapped me or anything. In fact, she invited me over tonight," he said.

"Well that's great. What's the problem?"

"What does it mean?"

"It means she likes you, I guess," Chris said. "Isn't that what you wanted?"

"What is she expecting?"

"Well how the hell should I know?"

"You're a woman, McKenna! What does she want?"

"Matt, maybe she just wants to spend the evening with you, have dinner again, talk, get to know you better. Are you afraid?"

"What if she wants sex?"

"Bring condoms," she teased.

"McKenna!"

"Will you lighten up? What if she does?"

"I'm not ready," he said. "I don't want it to be like that."

"You don't want a sexual relationship with her?"

"Yes. Just not on our second date." He looked at the closed door again before continuing. "McKenna, I think I love her. I mean, I think I might want to marry her."

"Good God, Matt. You've had one date. Are you trying to scare her to death?"

"We've had one date, but we've known each other since I came here. We've talked for hours. I feel like she's the one I was meant to be with."

"That's fine, Matt, but slow down. Last night was her first hint that you wanted more than friendship. Give her a chance to get used to this before you propose, okay? And what the hell is wrong with having sex? Please don't tell me you plan to wait until your wedding night?"

"No, of course not. But I don't want to make it into some cheap affair, either."

"You know, Matt, you are a rare breed." She stepped closer and gave him a hug. "Donna is a lucky woman."

"So, if I don't do anything more than kiss her again, she won't think I'm weird?"

Chris laughed. "She won't think you're weird. She'll think you're a gentleman."

"Thanks, McKenna. And you'll just keep this between us, right?"

"Of course."

Chris watched him nearly skip down the hall and she laughed. Love was in the air for sure.

"What was that all about?" Roger asked when Chris plopped down in the chair across from him.

"Private," she said. "Secret. Can't tell."

"Come on," he coaxed.

"Nope."

"Fine. I don't want to know, anyway. I've got enough to worry about. There's another damn storm out there," he said.

"This one wasn't bad, Roger. Only four or five inches in town."

"Yeah, but the mountain is full of skiers today, tomorrow will probably be worse as people from Sacramento drive up for a Sunday afternoon."

"The weather's fine, Roger. Will you quit worrying?"

"This spring, McKenna, when we lost those three skiers, that did me in. I mean, you hear about it all the time, but we were so helpless here."

"Sometimes, you can have the best SAR around and still be helpless."

"We didn't know how to respond. It started snowing and didn't stop for three days."

"Roger, if I'd been here, do you think I could have found them? They could have had radio transmitters, and we still wouldn't have gotten to them in time. It's not your fault."

"Yeah, but I've been dreading the season all the same. Damn jet stream," he murmured.

"Would you feel better if I went out on the trails?"

He smiled. "Bobby's already out there. He went up Ridge Trail. That's where they were," he said. "It shook Bobby up pretty good."

"Well, I'll take a stroll around Lake Trail, then."

"Ellen and I are having dinner at the Rock tonight, if you want to join us," he called as she walked out.

"Yeah, I might do that."

Chapter Thirty-eight

Chris stood silently in her kitchen, impatiently watching the coffee drip. She drummed her fingers on the counter while Dillon watched her.

"I know. Should have set the timer," she said.

But after the four beers she shared with Roger and Ellen, she'd gotten home last night and went straight to bed. As Jessie had said, sleep had not been a priority the last few nights. She wondered how the shopping trip had gone. Jessie had not been home yet when Chris went out for dinner and she didn't call her. She didn't want to interrupt her time with Annie.

"Finally," she said when the coffee stopped dripping. She poured a steaming cup, then took it back into the bedroom where the heater was still on. She dressed quickly, noting with some concern that low clouds were already drifting in from the west, obscuring the early morning sunshine. It was supposed to be another sunny day, perfect for skiing, but the clouds made liars out of the forecasters. Again. Maybe Roger's storm was making an early entrance.

She wasn't surprised to find Roger already at the ranger station. She met his worried eyes as soon as she walked in.

"What's up?"

"Goddamn storm," he said. "Low pressure in the Pacific moved ashore already. Ten hours early."

"What's the word?"

"Hell, like they know. The lodge is full, that's all I know."

"Roger, we can close the trails fairly quickly. Don't panic on me, okay?"

"We can close Lake Trail and Elk Meadow, sure. I'm worried about the back country."

She wanted to tell him not to worry. She'd worked many winters in Yosemite where storms had come up suddenly. And she could remember only two times where skiers didn't make it back in time and they had to go out and find them. Most skiers were aware of changing weather patterns and didn't take chances. But the type of skiers they had here were recreational, at best. Most of them wouldn't carry backpacks in case of emergencies. Most were families, just out for a quick few miles, then back to the warmth of the lodge or cabin, then maybe back out for another run in the afternoon. Only the most experienced skiers took the South Rim trail. And experienced skiers would watch the weather.

"You think I'm overreacting?"

"A little. Let's just watch the weather and wait for another update," she suggested.

"At ten," he said.

"Roger, you can't do this every time a storm comes up. You'll drive yourself crazy."

"I know. But it would really make me feel better if you went out and checked on the activity, see what's going on."

"Sure. I'll check the trailheads."

She grabbed a radio off of one of the chargers and left him as he flipped on the TV, searching out the Weather Channel.

She drove to the South Rim trailhead first. Skiers who would use this trail would normally start out early. She was happy to see only six names on the list, although two had listed the Nevada Trail instead of the loop that would take them back around by the Fire Lookout Trail. By the time she got to Ridge Trail, twenty-two skiers had signed in. It was seven miles to the loop and she thought that even if the storm hit early, they would still have enough time to ski down. She drove through town to where Lake Trail began. She didn't even bother checking the register. The parking lot was nearly full and she could see skiers across the lake as they made their way over the fresh snow. She assumed Elk Meadow would be the same.

The wind picked up suddenly, a gust shaking her Jeep as she drove back through town. She slowed, peering out the window at the low clouds, waiting for the first flakes to fall. The ringing of her cell phone startled her.

"McKenna."

"It's me."

"Jessie. Hi," Chris said, her voice softening. She had meant to call her this morning but that was before Roger and his storm worries.

"Bad time?"

"No, sorry. There's a storm coming. I'm just out checking trail-heads. How was your trip?"

"It was fun, actually. And I normally hate shopping, but Annie was like a kid out there."

"Good. I'm glad you had a good time." She paused, then said what was on her mind. "I missed you. A lot."

"I missed you, too," Jessie said quietly. "I came very close to pounding on your door at midnight."

"That would have been a nice surprise. Much better than the dream I had to settle for."

"Can I see you tonight?"

Chris grinned. She had to ask? Damn, she felt like a teenager, sitting here with a silly grin on her face.

"Want me to cook for you?" Chris offered.

"I'm not really in the mood for cereal, McKenna. How about a pizza?"

"Frozen?"

"No, I'll call the pizza place in Sacramento and see if they'll deliver, smart ass."

Chris laughed. "I love frozen pizza. Where and when?"

"My place. As soon as you can, okay?"

"Can't wait. I'll call you when things settle down around here."

"And McKenna?"

"Yeah?"

"Wear something that comes off easily."

Chris acknowledged the happiness that settled over her. Love? Well, even if it wasn't, it sure felt good. She glanced up and met the sparkling eyes in the mirror. Love.

It was just after ten when she parked the Jeep in front of the ranger station. There were skiers coming out with maps, and she hoped they were taking one of the short trails.

"McKenna, how was it out there?" Roger asked anxiously as soon as she came in.

"Busy. At least in town. What's new with the storm?"

"A wet one, for sure. They have torrential rains all along the coast. It's picked up speed. Could mean blizzard for us. They haven't posted warnings yet. They're going to let me know at noon."

She met his eyes and saw his concern. It was serious. "Have you checked South Rim? There were only six skiers signed in this morning," she said.

"Thirteen now."

"Lake Trail and Elk Meadow were packed," she said.

"We can get those closed if need be. We can get people out of there within an hour. South Rim though..." He shook his head. "Who knows? There are too many side trails from there. Not to mention the Nevada Trail. There were four skiers that listed that as their destination. Hopefully they'll know enough to turn around."

"Shit," she said quietly. "How long do we wait?"

"We'll wait until the next report to decide if we need to close the trails. My gut tells me we should do it now, but I don't want to overreact."

"Well, I've got a pack in my Jeep. I think I'll go out and see if I can round up Bobby and Greg. Just in case," she said. Bobby would be busy at the lodge, but she was certain Bill wouldn't mind her taking him for a few hours.

"Fine. Hatcher's on his way in. Matt was at Ridge Trail."

She tried calling Greg as she drove to the lodge. He didn't answer and there was no machine. She drove over to his shop before going to his house, but it was closed up. At his house, Greg's truck was there, but his snowmobile was missing. She left him a note to call Roger, then drove to the lodge.

She found Bobby in the rental shop.

"Busy?"

"Yeah, but judging by the weather, they'll be heading back in soon," he said.

"Storm's coming faster than expected. Roger's thinking we might have to close the trails. There are thirteen skiers out on South Rim," she told him.

She saw his eyes widen and knew he was remembering the three skiers they lost last season.

"Do you think it'll be a problem for you to leave if we need you?"

"Of course not. I'll tell Bill. Just let me know."

"Thanks, Bobby. I'll call."

She drove back to the ranger station, hearing on the radio that the winter storm watch had just been changed to a warning.

"Well?" she asked as soon as she walked in.

"Winter storm warning but we heard that on the damn radio. The weather service hasn't called and I can't get through," Roger said. "The guys?"

"Bobby's a go. Greg's out on his snowmobile, I think. I left a note." She looked into the concerned eyes of Roger and knew they were going to be in for a long day.

Just before noon, the call came from the National Weather Service in Sacramento and both she and Matt waited anxiously as Roger nodded into the phone. He hung up a short time later.

"ETA two o'clock. Blizzard conditions expected. He said we could see the first snow in an hour. They've got sixty-mile-an-hour gusts down there. It doesn't look good."

"Let's close the trails right now and get as many people off as we can," Chris said quickly.

"Yes, but what about South Rim, McKenna. What if they reached the Nevada Trail, there's not enough time."

"Matt, call Bobby and try Greg again. Roger, when Hatcher gets here, have him and Matt close Elk Meadow and Lake Trail. If skiers are on Ridge Trail, they'll have enough time to get back down, but you need to have someone ski the trail to make sure. I'll take Bobby and we'll head up South Rim," she said.

"Okay. It's a plan, at least. When Bobby gets here, you head out. There's only the four we're really worried about. Right?"

Chris gripped his arm hard and squeezed.

"Right, Roger. It's going to be okay."

"Damn, McKenna, I hate days like this," he said and he ran hands through his already unruly hair.

Bobby arrived with his full pack within fifteen minutes, but there was still no word from Greg. Chris thought how ironic it would be if they ended up searching for Greg as well.

She grabbed a fresh radio, then led Bobby to the back room to add ropes to their packs and get the folding aluminum rack. Just in case, she told herself.

"Keep in touch, McKenna."

"Don't worry, Roger. We'll be fine. Just take care of things down here."

They left, with Bobby strapping the aluminum rack to his pack and Chris taking the extra rope. Their packs weighed more than forty pounds with the added gear—no easy feat on skis. They posted the closed sign at the trailhead and checked the sign-in sheet. Of the thirteen, six had signed out.

They started out, both looking up at the sky, already steel gray with a heavy overcast. The wind was steady, not gusting, but the temperature was barely twenty degrees.

"Man, I'm not looking forward to this," Bobby said as he lowered his eyes from the sky.

"Me either. I'd rather be sitting by the fire with a bottle of rum," she said. "And, you know, maybe some female company." She pushed off with her skis, trying to set a rhythm.

They followed the tracks made by the other skiers and had barely rounded the first hill when two skiers approached. They stopped and waited.

"Looks like a storm coming," one of them said. "Better not head up."

"We're Search and Rescue," Chris said. "Where were you headed when you signed in?"

"Nevada Trail," the other man said. "But there's a skier up there that got separated from his buddy. We were on our way to the ranger station."

Chris and Bobby exchanged glances.

"He's up at the split where the trail becomes the Nevada Trail."

"I'll radio it in. Stay off the mountain. It'll be snowing like hell in an hour."

"Yeah. We're done for the day. But that guy, he's plenty scared."

"We're on our way up," Bobby said.

They watched the skiers go down, then Chris radioed Roger with the news.

"Be careful, McKenna. Keep an eye to the sky."

"Ten-four."

"Easy for him to say," Bobby mumbled.

They trudged slowly up the trail until it leveled off, then continued following the tracks. They wove their way in and out of the trees, up and down hills, all the time maintaining a quick pace. They both knew that if they had any hope of finding the skier, they must do it before the snow started. Tracks would be covered up quickly in even a light snowstorm and this promised to be anything but light.

They stopped once to catch their breath and to check their progress. The junction of the South Rim and Nevada Trail was still two miles away. Chris pushed her parka sleeve up and looked at her watch. One-thirty. They had made good time. She looked at the sky, and as if by doing so, the clouds opened up and the first snow flakes fluttered down around them.

"Shit," she said and pulled her gloves on again. "Let's go."

"I don't like this, McKenna," Bobby said as he, too, looked up at the sky. It was a dark gray, with swirling clouds hanging low on the mountain. It looked like it could burst open at any moment and engulf them.

"I know, but we gotta hurry."

They kept up their even pace as the snow fell lightly around them. The wind had not picked up, thankfully, and they covered the next two miles in near silence. Standing alone, waving at them, was the skier. He slid down the trail to them, nearly wiping them out as he tried to stop.

"Are you rangers?" he asked breathlessly.

"Search and Rescue," Chris said.

"Thank God. I didn't know what to do. It looks like a storm."

"No shit," Bobby said. "We can't waste time. Where did you split up?"

"At the trail up there," he said, pointing.

"Why?"

"We weren't sure which one to take. We didn't have a trail map," he said, glancing at them both.

"Jesus," Chris murmured. "What time?"

"About eleven, I think. Maybe a little later."

"You were both going to take a trail and ski back to meet up?"

"Yeah. We wanted to take the Nevada Trail but we didn't know the way."

"Okay," Chris said. "What's his name?"

"Kenny. Kenny Walker. We're staying at the lodge."

"What color is his jacket?"

"It's blue. Bright blue, just a little ski jacket."

Chris nodded. It was warmer this morning and sunny. They would not have thought to wear heavy parkas.

"Okay. We're going to look for him. You've got to get off the mountain. There's a hell of a storm coming. You've maybe only got a half-hour before it hits full force. Is it your car parked down there or his?"

"It's his."

"Great. And I don't suppose you have keys to it?"

He shook his head.

She pulled a glove off and dug in her pockets, fishing out the keys to her Jeep.

"Take my Jeep. Drive it to the ranger station. I'll radio in and tell them you're coming down."

"Don't you think I should go with you and look for him?"

"No. Now get down as fast as you can."

"But Kenny, I can't just leave him."

"We'll find him. We don't have time to look out for you, too. Now, get your ass down the mountain."

He looked at Bobby, as if for help, but Bobby motioned for him to go. They watched him ski off and Chris unhooked her radio and called to the station.

"This is Kay, McKenna. Everyone's out."

"Ten-four. Listen, we're at the junction to Nevada Trail. We sent a skier down. His partner is not accounted for. He was last seen heading east on Nevada Trail. Kay, he'll be driving my Jeep. I told him to go there so you'll know he made it down safely."

"Ten-four."

She hooked her radio back on her belt, then with a glance at Bobby, headed out. The Nevada Trail started out going downhill, which could fool you if you didn't have a map. She could see how the skiers thought this trail might take them down the mountain. Actually, it went downhill until it crossed a small stream, then went abruptly back uphill into the forest and beyond. If you stayed on it long enough, you'd end up at Lake Tahoe.

They were still following tracks, the light snow not enough to cover them yet, but they had no way of knowing if these were from their skier or the two that had already made it down. Most likely, they were from all three. The trail was marked, but some of the triangle markers were covered with snow, or the branches of the trees, now heavy with snow, were covering them. Without a map and compass, it would just be guesswork.

They crossed the stream and headed slowly up the hill. They were both tired and they stopped to catch their breath. Chris pulled off her wool cap and dusted the snow off, then put it back on and pulled it over her ears. She watched their frosty breath and wondered how cold it was. She had a small thermometer tied to her pack and she turned around, her back to Bobby.

"What's the temp?" she asked.

"Shit, it's already down to fifteen, McKenna."

Their eyes met, both worried. They started on up the trail again, their thighs aching. When they reached the top, they were able to see to the west and they stared out over the mountains. Dark, dark clouds, swollen with snow, hung heavily over the trees and as they watched, the wind increased, swirling around them, flinging icy snowflakes onto their faces.

Chris shook her head, her eyes never leaving his. She was putting their own lives in danger by staying out here, but out here they were. Even if they started back now, they would never make it down the mountain before the heart of the storm hit. They would have to find shelter somewhere, but she would worry about that later. Right now, they had to find the skier and hope that hypothermia had not taken him already.

"Let's hurry, Bobby. You check to the left, I'll take the right."

He nodded and they set out, both keeping their eyes on the side of the trail, looking for any sign of their skier. Another half-hour and the tracks they were following would be covered. Then, it would be only sheer luck if they found him.

They moved quickly over the snow, their skis sliding easily over the fresh powder. The trail was level here as it headed into the forest again. Chris's radio crackled seconds before Roger's voice called for her. They stopped and she quickly unhooked her radio and answered.

"We've got everything closed down here, McKenna. What's your ten-twenty?" he asked.

"We're probably three miles into the Nevada Trail. Maybe more." She looked at Bobby with raised eyebrows. It was hard to tell how far they were. Their usual landmarks were now buried in snow.

"I don't like it, McKenna. It's getting nasty down here."

"Yeah, the same here."

"Fifteen more minutes, then I want you turning back. How the hell are you going to get down?"

"I haven't thought about it," she lied.

"Fifteen, McKenna."

"Ten-four." She snapped the radio back on and started out again without looking at her watch. She didn't know what good it would do to head back in fifteen minutes. The storm would still catch them. She closed her eyes against the onslaught of wind and snow and headed out again.

A short while later, Bobby's voice stopped her.

"McKenna, look here. Could be skis," he said, pointing.

Two uneven tracks led off the trail, now all but covered up by the snow. She looked into the woods and saw a clearing.

"Could be. He might have seen that clearing and went to take a look, get his bearings. Let's follow it," she said. "It's all we've got."

They hurried off, leaving the relative safety of the trail behind, to follow the fading tracks. Roger's voice broke the silence and she ignored it, instead concentrating on the path ahead of them.

"Goddamn it, McKenna!" he bellowed through the radio.

She impatiently snatched it off. "We've got a trail, for God's sake, Roger!"

"Listen to me, McKenna. They've got whiteout conditions only fifteen miles from here. You've got to find shelter now!"

She looked at Bobby, just now noticing how thick the snow was falling. She looked at their trail, disappearing quickly. "Just a little longer, Roger."

"No! Goddamn it, McKenna, you damn fool. Let it go!"

"Ten-four."

"I mean it!"

"Ten-four." She switched off the radio and met Bobby's eyes. "What do you think?"

He shrugged. "We're this far. Where the hell are we going to find shelter anyway?"

"Yeah. Let's go."

They continued into the forest, hurrying now as the wind whistled around them, blowing snow into their faces. It was another ten minutes before they saw the blue jacket, barely visible through the snow.

He was lying face down and Chris was sure he would be dead. It doesn't take long for hypothermia to kill and they had no idea how long he had been here. Long enough to nearly cover him in snow, though. They turned him over quickly and Chris bent to his chest, clearly surprised to find his heart beating.

"Alive," she said and they both threw off their packs. Bobby quickly assembled the aluminum rack they would use to carry him and Chris took out the blanket from her pack and two chemical hand warmers, which she placed inside his jacket. They dusted off as much snow as they could, then lifted him onto the rack and covered him with the blanket.

"Hook the ropes, Bobby. I'll radio Roger."

Chapter Thirty-nine

Jessie paced nervously in the ranger station, finally stopping to meet Roger's eyes.

"You know she didn't turn around, don't you?" she asked Roger.

"Yes, the damn fool," he said. He had known all along that there wouldn't be enough time for them to get up the mountain and back down before the storm hit. Chris had known it, too.

Jessie had heard the updated forecast on the radio and had tried to call Chris. When she couldn't find her, she had even called Annie to see if she'd heard from her. She finally drove into town, relieved to find Chris's Jeep at the ranger station. Only Chris wasn't there. Roger told her that Chris and Bobby were out on the mountain looking for a skier.

Roger paced, too. He would wait a few minutes, then contact her again. God, she could be so stubborn sometimes. He looked around the room, seeing the worried look on Matt's face and the near frantic look in Jessie Stone's eyes. Only Hatcher remained impassive. When he met Jessie's eyes, he gave her a reassuring smile, then turned away. He didn't want her to see the worry in his own eyes. Blizzard conditions, whiteout, temperatures near zero. How would they survive the night?

"Roger, come in," McKenna's voice called urgently and he quickly snatched up the radio.

"Here."

"We found him. Unconscious but alive. Hypothermia for sure, maybe a concussion. He's got a pretty nice gash on his forehead. Probably hit a rock when he fell."

"Where are you?" he asked, not bothering with the radio code.

"We're still in the forest, about a half-mile off the trail," she said.

"Shit." He shook his head and met Mart's eyes. "Now what?"

"I don't know, Roger. We're going back to the trail and see how it is. We need to get down a little lower, the wind is hell up . . ." The radio crackled static over her voice.

"You're breaking up, McKenna. Ten-nine," he said, asking her to repeat her previous transmission.

"I'll check back after..."

"I'm not picking you up, McKenna. Ten-nine," he said again.

"Later. I'm out, Roger."

The static ended and silence hung between them in the room. Roger looked at the others and shrugged.

"I guess we wait."

"Man, I'm glad it's not me out there," Robert said.

"You know what, Hatcher? We're all glad it's not you out there. Because if it were up to you, you'd be sitting at a nice fire right now not giving a damn about anyone."

Matt stared at Roger then turned to Robert.

"Why don't you get out of here, man? We can handle it."

"Hey, I didn't mean anything," he said.

"Go home, Hatcher," Roger said. "The roads are getting bad. I'd hate for you to be stuck here with us."

"Fine with me."

After he left, Matt turned to Roger.

"Just once, I'd like to deck the guy. No wonder McKenna can't stand him."

"Yeah, he's a piece of work."

Jessie watched the exchange in silence, just barely able to hold her own tongue.

"Can they make it, Roger?"

"I don't know, Jessie. They'll be carrying an extra man," he said, letting his voice trail off. He didn't know how they could make the night. They were probably damn near exhausted as it was. Put up a tent and tie it down? Maybe, but neither of them carried a tent big enough for three. He shook his head. It was damn foolish to have sent them up there to begin with. The desperate feelings he felt last spring settled over him, and he prayed the outcome would not be the same.

"I want to stay here," Jessie said.

"No. There's nothing you can do here. Go to Annie's while the roads are still passable. Sit by the fire. I promise I'll call the minute I hear something. Promise."

"She means a lot to me, Roger. An awful lot," Jessie confessed.

"She means a lot to me, too. But there's nothing we can do now. They're on their own."

Chapter Forty

They put on their snowshoes and strapped their skis to their packs. It took them nearly forty minutes to pull him to the trail. They had to stop to maneuver him around trees and rocks, then nearly missed the trail. It was snowing so hard, they could barely see in front of them and they very nearly crossed over the trail and into the forest on the other side. Their tracks were almost completely covered and if they hadn't stopped to rest, they might have missed it.

"What are we going to do, McKenna?" Bobby asked urgently.

"Let's get down to Little Bear Creek. I have an idea," she said. She remembered the camping trip with Jessie when she had told her about caves. She said they were upstream, about a mile. A mile in this weather would seem like forever, but right now, it was all she could think of. She didn't want to consider that Jessie was a child the last time she had been here. What's a mile to a kid?

They made good time on the trail, pulling him easily in the snow.

Before they headed downhill towards the stream, Chris checked on Kenny. He was still unconscious and his skin felt cold. Very cold. She took off her pack and pulled out her sleeping bag and laid that on top of him, too. They had to get him warm or he would surely die.

"Ready?" she asked.

"Yeah, let's go."

They headed down the hill, faces turned into the fierce wind, and it took all of their strength to hold the injured skier behind them. If they weren't careful, he would go sliding down the hill without them, right into the stream. They both walked sideways, letting their snowshoes dig into the side of the hill for support. The steep hill leveled out before the stream, and they were able to relax the last fifty feet. At Little Bear Creek, which was now covered with snow, Chris turned upstream and she knew immediately that it wasn't going to be easy. Boulders littered the sides, some covered entirely with snow, and time and again they stepped, only to sink up to their waists as their feet missed a rock.

"Bobby, we've got to go a mile," she yelled against the wind. "Help me gauge the distance, okay?"

"I'll try," he yelled back.

She cringed as a gust of wind hit, nearly knocking them over. They could only see a few feet ahead as snow swirled in their faces. The blizzard had hit. She braced against the wind with every step and kept her eyes glued to the stream so that they wouldn't get lost. She thought briefly of all the stories she had heard about people lost in blizzards, wandering around in circles for hours before succumbing to the cold and surrendering to death. She wasn't about to let that happen to them. If nothing else, they would head into the trees and try to put up a tent and lie three-deep to try to stay warm. Stay warm? She couldn't remember the last time she'd been warm. She felt nearly frozen, head to toe.

She stared ahead, her eyes focused on the stream. She felt her nose running and ran a cold gloved hand under it and realized that it was numb. The wind pounded around them swirling the snow, and she lowered her head and continued on, trying to ignore the coldness that surrounded them.

She finally stopped to rest and turned to Bobby.

"How far?" she yelled.

He pushed his parka up his arm and looked at his watch. "Not a mile yet, I don't think," he said. "Where the hell are we going, anyway?"

"I'm not sure," she said, knowing he'd not heard her. God, it felt like they'd traveled at least five miles. She turned back into the wind and walked on, spitting out an obscenity as she sank again to her waist. She got back up and continued on, Bobby beside her as they pulled the unconscious Kenny Walker between them.

Fifteen minutes later, she again stopped. "Bobby, it's got to have been a mile."

"What are we looking for?"

"A cave," she yelled.

"Cave? What cave?"

"There's supposed to be a cave around here."

"Are you sure? I've never heard of a cave."

"No, I'm not sure," she said and looked around, trying desperately to see through the thickening snow. What had Jessie said? They would come to a flat area with outcroppings of granite. Right or left? She thought left, but she wasn't sure. She peered into the snow, but it was no good. She couldn't see two feet in front of them. They were never going to find the caves like this.

"Bobby, I'm going to go out looking," she said.

"No way. You'll get lost. You can't see shit," he yelled.

"I'll tie a rope to you," she said and took off her pack. She pulled out the rest of the rope and tied the end around her waist. The other end she gave to Bobby. "It's the only way."

"Be careful," he called as she walked away.

She stumbled blindly into the snow, her snowshoes now caked with wet packed snow. She knew instantly that they were in the right area. Flat, no rocks or trees that she could tell. She walked on, arms outstretched so that she wouldn't run into anything. Suddenly before her, were piles of rocks. Granite. She was close. She walked farther on, only feet from the rocks. She looked up, but couldn't tell how high they were. For all she knew, these were simply boulders, only five or six feet high, not the massive outcroppings that would form caves. It didn't feel right. She stopped and turned back, walking the opposite way along the rocks, her hands out guiding her. The wind whipped against the rock wall, bouncing back into her face, stinging her eyes as she squinted against its force.

Just as she was about to go back, her rope having run out, she saw the black hole against all the white surrounding her. She opened her eyes wide, hoping she was really seeing it and not just imagining it. There, a large hole opened up in the rocks. Her rope was tight, and she couldn't reach it to know for sure, but even if it wasn't Jessie's cave, it would give them shelter. She turned, her frozen hands gripping the rope, and made her way back to Bobby.

"I've found something," she yelled when Bobby was within sight. "It'll have to do."

She untied the rope around her waist and shoved it back in her pack, then slung it over her shoulders. "Come on."

She couldn't remember ever having been so cold. Her fingers were numb inside her gloves, and her feet felt like stumps as they walked against the wind, their heads bent as they followed her tracks.

"There," she said and pointed to the black hole facing them.

"I see it," Bobby yelled and they quickened their pace, pulling the skier between them.

They stopped at the entryway, both fishing their flashlights from their packs. They flashed the light around the room, then walked in and burst out laughing in relief. There, in the center of the small room, was a fire ring and against one wall was a pile of old, dried wood.

"Jesus, I can't believe it," Bobby said and his voice echoed against the walls.

"Neither can I. Come on, let's get a fire going."

They tossed their packs on the floor and quickly broke up the dried wood. Chris took some toilet paper from her pack and made small balls and laid it in the center of the ring. Bobby piled on small sticks and some dried bark and she set a match to it and soon the flame licked hungrily at the dry wood. Bobby laid on more, gradually building a warm campfire.

Chris took her sleeping bag and the blanket off of Kenny and pulled him closer to the fire. She nearly screamed when he spoke to her.

"Where am I?" he whispered.

"Jesus Christ!"

She found her flashlight and shone it in his face. He closed his eyes against the bright light, and she switched it off.

"We're Search and Rescue," she explained.

"Where's Michael?"

"He's fine. But right now, we've got to get you warm." She turned to Bobby. "Help me get him near the fire."

They pulled him as near as they dared, then she and Bobby stripped off their gloves and held their hands over the flames, ignoring the stinging as they warmed.

"I've never been this cold before, McKenna."

"I'm pretty much a popsicle myself." She looked to their injured skier. "Hey, what's your name?"

"Kenny. Kenny Walker," he said.

"What day is it?"

"It's Saturday... no, Sunday."

"What month?"

"I'm sure there's a reason for this?" he asked.

"What month?" she asked again.

"November and don't ask me the date. I always forget the damn date over the weekend," he said and offered her a smile.

"Good. Well, I pronounce you free of a concussion," she said, then turned to look at his face. He closed his eyes against the flashlight. "But you're probably going to need some stitches here." She touched the tender area around the gash and he winced.

"I must have fallen," he said. "I don't really remember. I got lost coming back. I was supposed to meet Michael back where the trail split."

"Don't worry about it now. We're going to be okay."

"I thought I was going to die," he said.

"You're damn lucky you didn't. It was just pure luck we spotted your tracks off the trail before we turned back," Bobby told him.

"He's right. I've seen hypothermia kill in a lot less time," Chris told him. She got out her first aid kit and began cleaning his wound. "Let me put a butterfly on this, then we need to get something warm in you." She felt his cheeks with both hands. "You're still too cold."

"Yeah. I'm starting to shiver," he said.

"That's a good sign. Your body's working again, trying to warm you." She turned to Bobby. "Put some water on to heat. I've got some tea bags in there somewhere."

She cleaned the gash on his head and put two butterfly bandages on to close it as best she could. Bobby filled one of their pots with water and set it on the small gas burner that he always packed and Chris filled another pot and set it near the fire. They would have tea first, then a hot meal. It was only then, as they busied themselves, that she thought to radio in.

"I better check in with Roger. He's probably out of his mind."

She opened her parka and reached for the radio, only to find the holster empty.

"Shit. Bobby, tell me you've got the radio," she said.

"No," he said, shaking his head.

"Shit," she said again. She let the beam of the flashlight zigzag across the floor, hoping it had fallen out in the cave, but she knew it had not. "I must have lost it along the creek. Lord knows I fell down enough."

She silently cursed herself. The last time she had talked to Roger, they were in a hurry to get going and she had failed to secure it in the holster. She had simply shoved it in without thinking. Well, it wouldn't do any good to worry about it now. There was nothing they could do. Hopefully, Roger wouldn't think the worst.

Chapter Forty-one

Jessie knew she was insane to be out in this weather, but she didn't want to spend the night alone. She crept through the deserted town, trying desperately to see through the snow. She had driven in enough snowstorms to know to look through the snow to the road or you would become hypnotized by the flakes as they surround your car, but she had never driven in a blizzard.

She passed the lodge at the edge of town, the parking lot full. Most of the guests were staying over another night since the roads heading back to the city were already closed. She slowed to a crawl as she approached the forest road that would take her to Annie's. Her four-wheel drive held as she made the corner, but the road was completely covered in snow and she tried to stay in the middle for fear of skidding off the side and getting stuck. She nearly took out Annie's mailbox as she turned into the driveway, her rear fender missing it by inches, and she pumped the brakes, coming to a standstill next to the house. She released the death grip she had on the steering wheel, and let out a relieved breath. She grabbed the overnight bag from the backseat, slammed the door and ran up the steps. Annie had the door open before she could knock and she hurried past her into the warm house.

"Jessie, thank God," Annie said. "You shouldn't have been driving in that. The radio says the roads are a mess."

"Well, they're not lying," she said as she took off her parka.

Annie took it from her and hung it on the coat rack by the door. "Sit by the fire. I'll bring you a glass of wine."

Jessie nodded and stood with her back to the fire, her hands held out behind her. She squeezed her eyes shut. She was so worried about Chris. Was she still battling the blizzard on the trails or had she found shelter? She didn't want to think about the possibility of no shelter. It would be below zero by morning, not to mention the wind chill.

"I'm glad you're here, Jessie, but I was worried about you driving in this. Why didn't you just go over to Chris's? I'm sure she wouldn't have minded you staying with her."

"Chris is out on the mountain, Annie," Jessie said.

"What? In this? Oh, no," she said. "Did someone get hurt?"

"Two skiers got separated at the Nevada Trail. One of them made it back. Chris and Bobby went out to look for the other one," she stated, her voice flat.

"Surely, the storm... they knew it would hit," Annie said. "They can't possibly try to ski in this."

Jessie heard the worry in her voice, but she had no words of comfort.

"Roger lost radio contact. It was too much static. He said he would call as soon as he knew something," she said quietly, feeling her voice catch.

"Oh, no." Annie sank down on the sofa. "Jessie, we mustn't think the worst. Chris is trained, she knows the mountain. She'll know what to do," Annie said firmly, but in a tone edged with worry.

Jessie met her eyes. "Do you think so?"

"Yes." She offered a small smile. "In case you haven't noticed, Chris can be very stubborn. She won't let this storm get the best of her."

"I hope you're right, Annie." She looked at her watch. An hour and a half since she'd left Roger. "I'm going to call in, though. Just in case he has some news."

Jessie walked to the phone and Annie watched her, surprised at her obvious worry for Chris, a woman she had only known a short time.

"It's Jessie. Anything new?" she asked.

Annie could tell by the drop of Jessie's shoulders that there was no news.

"What do you mean?" A pause. "There's static on the line, Roger. Let me give you my cell number. You promise you'll call the second you know something?"

Annie listened as Jessie rattled off her number, then waited as Roger spoke.

"I know, Roger, but I'm nearly out of my mind here. I don't know what she's told you... good, then you understand my feelings."

Annie watched Jessie hang up the phone, then down her glass of wine in one swallow.

"What is it?" she asked.

"There's no radio feedback at all. She's not even trying to acknowledge their transmission," she said quietly. She was on the verge of tears and she walked rapidly into the kitchen and refilled her wineglass. Oh, her sweet Chris, please let her be okay.

"Jessie, that doesn't mean anything's happened to them," Annie said from behind her. "The radio could have frozen up, the storm could block the transmission, anything."

"I know," she said softly. God, she didn't want to cry in from of Annie. How would she explain tears to Annie?

"I didn't realize Chris meant so much to you," she said.

Jessie turned around and met her questioning eyes. "We've become close," she said simply. She felt a tear slide down her cheek, and she finally gave in to them. "I've just found her. I can't possibly lose her now," she cried.

Annie wrapped her arms around the crying Jessie, soothing her, not having any idea of what Jessie was talking about.

"Shhh, it'll be okay. Come, let's sit by the fire. Then you can tell me what's got you so upset."

Jessie followed numbly behind Annie and sat at the edge of the sofa. She stared into the fire, wiping the remaining tears away. Oh, she longed for Chris to be here, to comfort her.

"Jessie?"

She turned her eyes to Annie, wondering what her reaction would be? Would she be upset? Startled? Disappointed?

"Chris is very important to me, Annie," she said quietly. "We're..." What? Lovers? Of course. But they were more than just that.

"You've become good friends, Jessie. I had hoped you would," Annie said.

"We're more than friends, Annie. Chris and I... are lovers," she confessed. At Annie's shocked expression, she continued quickly. "I know you don't understand, and this is probably a complete shock to you, but Chris and I... well, we have this connection between us. It was there from the beginning. And I've never needed anyone like I need her. I've never had anyone in my life, Annie, but I need Chris in my life." She felt tears form again and pushed them away. "And I can't lose her now."

Annie nodded, for once at a complete loss for words. To say that Jessie's words had shocked her would be an understatement. She knew there was a familiarity between them, but still, she didn't think there had been enough time for them to explore this type of a relationship.

"Please say something."

"I know that Chris is a lesbian. She told me awhile ago. It just never occurred to me that you were, I guess. Or is this just because of Chris?" she asked hesitantly.

Jessie shook her head. "It's not just Chris, Annie. I've never had a lover before, I've just had sex partners. But always women."

Annie took a deep breath. "Because of Jack?"

Jessie shrugged. "Maybe. I don't know. I just have no attraction to men. But Chris broke down all my barriers, made me feel something, made me want something. She's given me hope that I might have love in my life."

"You're in love with her?" Annie asked quietly, not really understanding.

"I don't know what it feels like to be in love, Annie. I only know I hurt inside thinking she might not come back to me," she whispered.

Annie reached over and took her daughter's hand and held it gently.

"I don't know why I'm surprised. Chris has a way about her, she's such a charmer. And I've not been completely blind to the looks that pass between you two sometimes." She squeezed Jessie's hand. "I'm not too old to appreciate a good romance. So tell me, it was the other night when you had dinner here?"

Jessie blushed and Annie laughed.

"Roger couldn't find Chris the next morning. That's because she was with you?"

"Yes."

Annie smiled at Jessie's obvious embarrassment. She couldn't wait to get Chris alone. Oh, the teasing would be merciless.

Chapter Forty-two

They sipped hot tea while they waited for the water to boil for their dinners. Kenny was sitting with them by the fire, his eyes staring at the snow swirling around the opening to the cave. He knew he was lucky to be alive.

"Why isn't there more smoke in here?" he asked.

"It's not a real cave. It was formed by fallen rock, an outcropping. It's just rising up and slipping through the cracks," Chris said.

"It feels warm in here."

"The rocks absorb heat." She reached for her pack and read the temperature from the thermometer tied on the back. "A balmy thirty-three degrees, if you can believe that. It's probably in the single digits outside."

They were quiet as they watched the snow and listened to the wind howl. Soon, it would be too dark to see outside, but they were warm, they had food, and the fire kept them company.

"I think the water's ready," Bobby said. He took the pot from the small stove and set it on the ground. Chris held the flashlight for him and he opened two of the freeze-dried packages and dumped them in the water. Chris put another pot on to boil and Bobby covered his and set it aside. He glanced at his watch. Eight minutes to supper!

"This is ours," he told Kenny. "She's got some meatless pasta concoction."

It was completely dark outside by the time they finished eating, although it was barely after five. The dark clouds surrounded the mountain and the wind and snow continued pelting the rocks, but they stayed warm. Bobby gave up his sleeping bag to Kenny, who was already asleep. He would make do with his parka and the wool blanket.

"Do you think he'll be okay?" Bobby asked.

"Yeah. Take him a few days to get his strength back. I'm surprised he was able to sit up as long as he did."

"Well, I know it's early, but I'm damn near exhausted," he said and he settled under his parka.

"I know. I feel like I could sleep twelve hours." She stood up and slipped her coat back on. "I've got to pee," she said.

"Don't go far," Bobby warned.

"Don't worry. I'll only go far enough to hang my butt out," she said and laughed.

Later, as the others lay sleeping, Chris added another small log to the fire and sat staring out into the night. The wind had subsided a little, but snow was still falling. She figured everyone was plenty worried about them. Especially Jessie. She cursed herself for not calling her before they left, but there had been no time. And for her to lose the radio. That was a stupid thing to do.

She finally crawled into her sleeping bag, letting thoughts of Jessie warm her. Was she with Annie tonight? Or had she stayed at her cabin, waiting? Frozen pizza. Chris smiled. She'd give anything to be sitting in front of the fire eating pizza right now. And then, later, snuggled under the covers. She closed her eyes and listened to the fire crackle, remembering Jessie's hands on her, eager hands that had nearly ripped the shirt from her body in their haste to touch. Soft hands that cradled her breasts, guiding them to a waiting mouth. Warmth settled over Chris as she thought of that mouth and all it would do to her.

She rolled over, trying to quell the ache inside her. What if she was never to see Jessie again? Never feel her touch? They could very well have frozen to death out there. She didn't want to think about how close they had been. If not for this cave .. .

Sleep finally claimed her and she slept soundly until dawn, when the morning chill invaded the small cave. She opened her eyes and Bobby was already trying to get the fire going again.

"Morning, McKenna," he said, his frosty breath swirling around him.

She looked at Kenny, who was still asleep, then sat up and grabbed the thermometer. Ten. When the fire died, it hadn't taken long for the cold to creep inside.

"You must have been cold without a sleeping bag," she told him.

"I slept like a log until about an hour ago. I was shivering and it woke me."

He had a small fire going in no time, adding what was left of the bark and small sticks. Then, he took out his small stove and put on water to boil for tea.

"I need to pee but it's too damn cold," he said. "You?"

"Yeah, but I can wait," she said. She lay back down and pulled her sleeping bag more firmly around her. "The snow has stopped."

"Yeah. It's clearing," he said. He stood up and held his hands over the fire for a minute. "Okay, I'm going out. Wish me luck."

She smiled and nodded, finally making herself get out of the warm sleeping bag. She went to the fire and squatted beside it, warming her hands. Kenny stirred in his bag and sat up.

"I thought I was dreaming, but I'm really here," he said, his voice hoarse from sleep.

"Oh, yeah, you're really here and we've got at least eight miles to go to get out of here. Hopefully they'll send someone to look for us," she said, looking towards the entrance. "And hopefully they'll be on snowmobiles, but don't you dare tell Bobby I said that. I normally hate snowmobiles."

An hour later, after hot tea and breakfast, they packed up. They gave Kenny a pair of snowshoes and Chris and Bobby would take turns on skis, breaking a trail. Bobby estimated that at least three feet of snow had fallen, and it would be slow going. Chris again hoped someone would be coming. She didn't think Kenny had the strength to make it eight miles.

"Ready?" she asked and they left the cave behind and ventured out into the cold.

Chapter Forty-three

Jessie woke with a start, dismayed that the sun was already up. She hadn't planned on sleeping so long. She sat up quickly, then held her head. Too much wine last night. She pulled on sweatpants and hurried downstairs, smelling the sweet aroma of Irish crème coffee.

Annie stood at the counter, cup in hand, when Jessie walked in. She could tell by the look in Annie's eyes that she'd heard something.

"What is it?"

"I used your little phone there to call Roger. Phone lines are down. They've still not made any radio contact with them," Annie said. "He's sent Matt and Greg out on snowmobiles, although he's not sure how far they can make it. There's a lot of snow, Jessie."

Jessie looked out the window and for a moment, she forgot her worries over Chris. The scene outside was Christmas perfect. Pristine, still, the snow sparkling in the sunlight and all the trees hanging low, barely a green bough could be seen. Then she looked again, closer. The picnic table under the large cedar was nowhere to be found and Annie's bird feeder now stood barely two feet from the snow.

She turned back to Annie. "How much?"

"It's hard to say, what with the wind making drifts. Roger said there's a ten-foot drift in front of the ranger station. He thinks at least four feet in the mountains, maybe more."

"Jesus," Jessie murmured. "Well, I've got to do something. I can't just sit here without knowing."

"There's nothing you can do, child," Annie said firmly. "They'll be all day just trying to clear the roads. Now, have some coffee and I'll make you some breakfast." Jessie looked at her with dismay and Annie added, "It'll keep us busy, if nothing else."

Jessie sat down at the table and took the coffee from Annie. She tried not to think that she might not ever see Chris again. She squeezed her eyes shut, trying to keep her tears away.

Annie saw her shoulders shaking and dried her hands and went to her. She stood behind her and wrapped her arms around her shoulders, trying to find the words to comfort her.

"Jessie, do you believe Chris loves you?" she asked softly.

Jessie opened her eyes, turning the question over in her mind. Did Chris love her? She'd never said. She said she cared for her, but was that the same thing? Then she thought of the way Chris looked at her, the way she touched her, the gentle way she made love to her.

"Yes, I think maybe she does love me," she whispered.

"I think she does, too. And if she loves you, she would do anything she could to come back to you. You must believe that. I know Chris is okay. I feel it in my heart," Annie said. And she did.

Chapter Forty-four

They heard the roar of snowmobiles in the distance and they stopped, looking at each other and smiling.

"Never thought I'd love die sound of those damn things," Chris told Bobby.

He laughed. "And I never thought I'd hear you say it."

They had been on the trail three hours, but had only made it a couple of miles, at best. They had missed the Nevada Trail and had continued following the stream, or what they thought was the stream, for nearly a half-hour before turning back. The view of Sierra Peak was too visible for them to be on the right trail. From Nevada Trail, only the top of the peak would show. Chris dug her compass out from her pack and tried to get their bearings. They backtracked and she and Bobby went in opposite directions, looking for markers on the trees. They finally found one and climbed the long hill to the junction of the South Rim Trail, only to find that they didn't know where die junction was. They could find no more markers. All the trees were heavy with snow, their branches hanging low to the ground. Nothing looked familiar to them, so they simply walked up to the trees, sinking well past their waists. They used their ski poles to knock off snow until they found a marker. Once they were in the right direction, they took out the compass and map, trying to gauge where the trail was. Every several hundred feet, Bobby would go to the trees again to look for markers, just to make sure they were on the right track.

They continued on, listening for the approach of the snowmobiles. It was another hour before they spotted them and they hugged each other and cheered as Greg and Matt stopped just a few feet in front of them.

"Well, I'll be," Matt said. "Look at you! You're not frozen at all," he said and laughed. "Glad you're okay," he said seriously.

"Are we glad to see you," Chris said. "Snowmobiles and all."

"Did I hear you right, McKenna?" Greg asked, a huge grin on his face. "Thought you hated these damn things?"

"Yeah. And I can't wait to get on that damn thing."

Bobby took Kenny on one snowmobile and Chris, after kissing both Greg and Matt full on the mouth, took the other, leaving them behind to ski down. They radioed Roger with the good news, then followed the tracks of the snowmobiles down the mountain.

Considering how long it had taken them on die skis, it seemed that in no time at all they were at the trailhead. They followed the road into town, most of the buildings unrecognizable under the heavy blanket of snow.

"Look at that drift, McKenna," Bobby yelled, pointing to the pile of snow that covered the windows of the ranger station.

Within minutes, they were standing in the warmth of the ranger station, telling their story.

"I've never heard of a cave being out there, McKenna," Roger said.

"Well, Jack knew about them," she said. "He took Jessie there when she was young."

"You're damn lucky, kid," he said, then hugged her for the third time. "How could you have lost the radio?"

"Oh, I don't know. There was a blizzard blowing, I was exhausted, my hands were frozen. Hell, how do you think?" she asked and laughed with him. It was easy to laugh now. They were safe.

He took her aside and put his arm around her. "I was worried sick, McKenna," he said seriously. "And you need to call Jessie. She's at Annie's. I called diem and told them we'd found you, but she was pretty shook up about it."

Chris nodded.

"Oh, and you'll have to use your cell. The phone lines are down."

"My phone is buried in my Jeep, Roger. At least, I think that lump out there is my Jeep."

"Mine's on my desk."

She closed the door behind her, relaxing for a minute before picking up the phone. She searched her memory for Jessie's number, then found it scribbled on a note on Roger's desk. The phone was answered on the first ring.

"Thank God, it's you. Are you okay? Do you still have all your fingers and toes?" Annie asked.

"All accounted for, although I'm still not completely thawed."

"A shot of brandy and a nice fire will do wonders. Now, let me get Jessie. She's been, well, she's been nearly out of her mind, thinking she'd lost you. Here."

Chris didn't have time for Annie's words to register. Another voice was calling to her.

"Chris ... sweetheart," Jessie whispered. "You're okay, right?"

"I'm okay."

"You know, McKenna, you missed our dinner date. One frozen pizza down the drain," she said lightly.

"Funny you should say that. Last night, while I was trying to sleep, I was thinking that I'd give anything to be sitting by a fire with you, eating that damn pizza."

"I was so afraid for you, Chris. Annie's had to put up with my fits of crying," she said. "I think she's ready for me to be gone."

"You were crying?" Chris asked. "Why were you crying?"

"I was afraid I'd never see you again. I was afraid you weren't going to come back to me, and there were still so many things I wanted to tell you. And I was afraid that I wouldn't get the chance."

Chris smiled, wondering if Annie was standing there listening. This conversation wasn't exactly between friends.

"We found your cave, by the way. It's the only thing that saved us."

"Chris, I..." She hesitated. The words she wanted to say weren't made for the telephone. Besides, she thought that Annie was enjoying the conversation far too much. "When can I see you?"

"I hope tonight, Jessie. I really want... need to be with you tonight," she said softly.

"I'll come to your cabin as soon as the roads are clear enough. And McKenna?"

"Yes?"

"There's really no need for you to dress," she whispered.

She sat there with a silly grin on her face when Roger stuck his head inside.

"Everything okay?"

"Everything's great, Roger."

He sat down in one of his visitor's chairs and studied her. She knew she must look a sight and she ran a hand through her disheveled hair.

"Jessie was over here yesterday. She saw your Jeep, thought you were here," he said. "She heard the last few radio transmissions and it shook her up pretty bad when we thought we'd lost you." He rubbed the heavy stubble on his chin, evidence that he had not gone home last night.

"It was stupid of me not to secure the radio, Roger, but it was pure hell out there," she said truthfully. "I don't mind saying that I was plenty scared," she admitted.

"I don't doubt it. We were all scared for you. You did a hell of a job, saving that man's life. He's damn lucky it was you out there and not Hatcher or someone else. They would have been more concerned about their own hide and the hell with a lost skier."

"Oh, I don't know. Bobby never once suggested that we give up. In fact, I asked him several times if he wanted to head back and he didn't."

"That's because you've taken Bobby under your wing and he idolizes you," he said.

"He does not, he just cares about things, you know. He's perfect for SAR." She leaned back in her chair and relaxed. "Roger, I want to put him on salary. Part-time, if nothing else. He does far too much to be a volunteer," she said.

"I know. I've already put in a request. With Hatcher out of here in a few months, we'll have room in the budget."

He stood up and smiled at her, then raised an eyebrow.

"I'm assuming you have plans tonight?"

"My plans include a hot fire, something alcoholic to drink, I'm thinking brandy. And of course, a very warm, very soft female body to kiss away my aches and pains."

Roger blushed scarlet and hurried to the door.

"Jesus, McKenna, I don't need details!"

Chapter Forty-five

Jessie drove carefully down the partially cleared road. It seemed like forever before the snowplows made it up Annie's way. She really had no idea how deep the snow was until she was out in it. Snow was piled high on each side of the road and there were no visible fences that she could see. She made her way past Mary Ruth's cabin and wondered how she had fared. Her car was still buried. On the drive to Chris's cabin, it was just one long snow tunnel and she parked behind Chris's Jeep, which was still heavy with snow.

It was nearly dark when she got there and a few stars were already blinking in the clear cold sky. She pulled her parka tightly around her and hurried to the door, pausing only a moment before knocking. Chris called to her and she walked into the warm room, the fireplace glowing hotly. Chris lay on the sofa, a pillow tucked under her head and Dillon curled on her stomach. Their eyes met and held, a slow smile forming on Chris's face.

"Hey."

Jessie nodded, feeling her throat threatening to close. She was nervous. As nervous as she'd ever been in her life. What if she was wrong about Chris? What if Chris laughed it off, blaming it on the snowstorm? She shrugged out of her parka and let it fall to the floor.

"Chris... I... there's something I want to tell you. Need to tell you," she started. She stood firmly rooted by the door, her legs refusing to carry her closer to Chris. "You may not want to hear it."

Chris sat up but still clutched Dillon in her lap. She had no idea what was coming, but Jessie looked ready to bolt through the door.

"Okay. What is it?" she asked hesitantly.

"It's me... it's us," she said. At Chris's frightened look, she hurried on. "I don't know what you want, but... I... oh, hell, McKenna, I wanted to warn you that... I think I'm in love with you. At least, I think that's what this is. And I wanted to give you a chance to get out or tell me I'm out of my mind before I say something really stupid or..."

"I love you, too," Chris said softly, interrupting her somewhat chaotic speech.

"What?"

"Come here."

"What did you say?" Jessie whispered.

A gentle smile broke across Chris's face and she stood, slowly walking the short distance to the door.

"You want me to say it again?"

Jessie nodded mutely.

"I'm in love with you. You consume my thoughts, day and night. And when I look into your eyes, I see my life there. I see everything that matters to me, and it has nothing to do with this place or this job, or Annie or the damn snowstorm. It's just you and me and the love I feel inside for you."

Jessie knew she was crying. She could feel the tears on her face, but she couldn't look away from the clear, blue eyes so close to her own. Blue eyes that burned with love... for her.

"That was the most beautiful thing anyone's ever said to me," she whispered. She was able to move then. Move into the arms that opened for her. She buried her head against Chris's neck and let her tears fall. Never in her life did she think she deserved this. Never once did she think she would ever find this.

Chris felt her soul open up and take Jessie inside. It filled her with such joy that she ached from it. She gently lifted Jessie's head and kissed the tears away, finally finding her lips and placing soft kisses there.

"Let me make love to you," she whispered. "Let me show you how much I love you."

The bedroom was dark, and Chris paused to draw the covers back before undressing the silent Jessie who stood numbly before her. She quickly shed her own clothes and lay back, pulling Jessie with her. As soon as she felt Jessie's weight settle on top of her, she was lost. The gentle, slow lovemaking she'd planned vanished as Jessie's hungry mouth found hers. Tongues battled and Chris rolled them over, pinning Jessie to the bed. But she wanted to go slow. They had all the time in the world. She straddled Jessie's hips, pressing intimately against her as her mouth found Jessie's breast. Her lips closed over an erect nipple and she moaned with pleasure, loving the way Jessie's hands held her firmly to her breast. She suckled her breast, teasing the tip with her tongue, feeling it swell in her mouth.

Jessie closed her eyes, giving in to the gentle touch of her lover. She heard the contented sigh from Chris, felt her move ever so slowly to her other breast. She opened her eyes, meeting blue ones that closed as her mouth settled over her. Again Jessie thought, what did she do to deserve this?

She felt Chris's lips move across her stomach, felt the cool air on her still wet nipples. Her hips arched and she pressed up, feeling Chris's wetness against her thigh. Her hand moved between them, finding the wetness with her fingers. Chris sat up, then settled back down, guiding Jessie's fingers inside her. Jessie heard Chris's breath hiss as her fingers were engulfed in wetness.

"Oh, yes... that feels so good," Chris murmured. Her hips rose again and came back down on Jessie's hand, impaling herself. She nudged Jessie's thighs apart, her own fingers sliding through hot silk, slipping inside Jessie in one quick thrust.

Jessie drew a sharp breath and pressed her hips up, drawing Chris inside her. Their rhythm became one as hands and hips danced together, moving in and out of each other in perfect harmony. She opened her eyes to find Chris watching her. Chris's own eyes were glazed over, her mouth slightly opened as she struggled to draw breath.

Jessie was mesmerized. With her free hand, she found Chris's breast and squeezed the nipple between her fingers. She watched Chris's eyes close, watched her head tip back. The pressure of her hips increased and Jessie struggled to maintain the rhythm. Her fingers met each thrust of Chris's hips and her own legs opened wide, allowing Chris deep within her. She felt the first tremors of Chris's body, felt muscles squeeze her fingers tight and she finally gave in to her own release. She let it come, let it nearly overwhelm her with its force.

She couldn't have held back the scream if she'd tried. It mingled in the air with Chris's as her hips went down on Jessie for one last stroke. She closed her legs tight, holding Chris's fingers inside her as Chris finally stilled, her hips settling back down on Jessie's hand. Her wetness ran down Jessie's arm and Jessie groaned. She licked her lips, wishing her mouth were there instead.

They stayed like that for a moment, Chris still sitting upright, Jessie lying back, their eyes locked together.

"I love you," Chris whispered.

"I love you."

She finally moved, letting Jessie's fingers slip away from her. She withdrew her own, then brought them to her mouth, licking Jessie's wetness from her fingers.

Jessie thought it was the most intimate thing she'd ever seen. She reached up and drew Chris's mouth to her own, tasting herself on Chris's lips.

Chris lay down beside Jessie and pulled the covers over them. She gathered Jessie in her arms and gently kissed her damp forehead.

"Are you okay?"

Jessie nodded,

"That was... beautiful."

"Yes. It was perfect."

Chris leaned down and placed a soft kiss on Jessie's lips.

"I told Annie about us," Jessie said suddenly.

"What? You did? Was she okay?"

"Yes. I think she was ... surprised. Although I think she probably suspected there was more to our relationship than we let on."

"Jessie, please tell me you're not leaving. You're not going back to New York."

"No. I want to stay here with you. I want to try to have a life together, if that's what you want. That is what you want, isn't it?"

"Yes. I want you here with me always."

Epilogue

Annie paused to catch her breath, leaning against a large cedar. It had been over seventeen years now since she'd hiked up Ridge Trail and it was steeper than she remembered. She looked out over the canyon, thinking how much had changed in the last year.

Jessie had built a new home in the early summer, not far from Annie's. She had given Jessie half of the acres that her own house sat on and Jessie and Chris had hiked all over, looking for the perfect spot in which to live. They found it on the down slope of the mountains, butted up against Sierra Peak. A green, lush valley spread out in front of the cabin, and they watched herds of elk and deer in the evenings. Annie joined them often for dinner, traveling down the bumpy dirt road in the old Jeep that Chris had found for her.

She took a swallow of water from her canteen and moved on, leaving the shade of the cedar and continuing up the trail. She had not told the girls that she was coming up here and she had not signed in at the trailhead. Should Chris happen along and find her name there, she would be up the trail in an instant to check on her. She glanced at her watch and frowned. It was taking her longer than she had planned and she was supposed to be at Jessie's at five to help with dinner. They were having a cookout and Roger and Ellen were joining them, along with Matt and that nice girl from the cafe. Oh, and Bobby. He was quickly becoming her favorite, with his boyish good looks. They were all good friends and none of them seemed the least bit shocked when Jessie and Chris moved in together. Well, times had certainly changed.

Annie was lost in her thoughts when she stopped suddenly. She had thought that she might not remember, but here it was, the ledge with the gap in it. She jumped it easily and took a deep breath, seeing the sheer cliff underneath her, the deep drop into the canyon below. She felt her life had come full circle. That was why she had come up here. Or so she told herself. Maybe she had come up here for the same reason Jessie had last August. To talk to Jack. To shake his ghost.

Why she had ever come up here with him at all, she'd never know. Perhaps she thought him to be sincere, even though all her instincts told her he wasn't. After Jessie had gone off to school, he had come to her. He said they needed to talk, that she should accompany him on the trails. She had been dumbfounded. Never before had she been allowed on the trails with him. But she had agreed. They needed to talk about their marriage and about Jessie. They didn't speak on the hike up and she had to race to keep up with his long, purposeful strides. At this very ridge, he had jumped the gap and stood near the edge, looking over.

"Come take a look," he had said.

And she had, jumping the gap as easily as he had. She was wary of him though. Something wasn't right, she knew. The way he looked at her with those piercing black eyes. The way his lips were pressed together in grim determination.

He had turned to her, a sneer on his lips. "You thought I wouldn't find out about your old man in San Francisco, didn't you? How could you? How could you betray me and Jessie that way?"

She remembered standing tall, unafraid. For too long, she had cowered to him. "The same way you've betrayed me for twenty years," she told him.

"Men are different," he spat at her. "I'm different. You're nothing but a slut. You're not fit to live in the same house with us."

She instinctively took a step back. His eyes were so very black. He looked crazed and she was suddenly so very afraid.

"You're not really fit to live at all, Annie. You know that, don't you?"

He had turned to her and she knew immediately what he planned. She backed up a step, her hands outstretched. She remembered his wicked smile when his long arm had reached out to her and his hand had captured her small wrist.

"Jack, no," she had pleaded with him. "You don't know what you're doing."

"I know perfectly well what I'm doing. I'm getting you out of our lives for good. You don't deserve us. You've never been a wife to me, never a mother to my Jessie. I should have done this years ago."

He pulled her to him with such great force, her feet left the safety of the ledge, and she was suspended in air, thinking briefly that it would all be over quickly and it wouldn't hurt too much. One push by him and she would be over the side and into the canyon.

Thinking back now, she knew it was his smile and laughter that had done it. He had already thought he'd won again and she was tired of losing to him. She curled her hands into claws and angrily struck his face, her nails cutting into his skin, drawing blood. He dropped her forcefully and she landed on her back, just feet from the edge of the cliff. He frantically wiped at the blood on his face and she quickly stood, and without thinking, kicked him in the groin, her hiking boot hitting him squarely between the legs. So hard, he fell to his knees, air whistling from between his teeth. He had looked at her then, eyes so angry she knew he meant to kill her with his bare hands. How he was able to stand, she never knew. But he did, very slowly.

"Bitch!" he screamed at her. "How dare you? You'll be sorry now, Annie."

She looked out over the canyon, seeing it all so clearly now. Seventeen years ago, it had all been a blur. How had she jumped out of the way? She never knew. But now she saw it all as if it were happening again.

His face was red with rage and their eyes met, locked together in fight. He had lunged at her, so quickly she didn't have time to think. She simply dropped to her stomach, intending to protect herself, but he sailed over her, stumbling at the edge of the cliff, one foot hanging over, suspended. He had screamed once, a high, girlish scream, and seemed to catch his balance. Annie had turned to look at him and he had reached out to her as he teetered on the edge.

"No! Please..."

She reached for him without thinking, but it was too late. Their eyes met for an instant. Shock and disbelief flashed across his face as he tumbled backwards over the cliff and into the canyon below.

How long she sat there, she didn't know. Still didn't. She had walked home. No one saw her. She was in shock, she knew that much. She had bathed and washed her clothes and simply waited for Roger to come tell her the bad news. And he had.

Sitting on the edge now, she breathed a sigh of relief. Over the years, she had often wondered if maybe it would have been better for her to have gone over the edge instead of Jack. Her life had been so empty for so long.

Then Roger had moved back and had drawn her out a little. Then, of course Chris. She was the one who made Annie feel alive again, made her look forward to life again. Finally, her sweet Jessie had come home. All those lonely years were worth it. Now, she had everything.

She stood up and looked out over the canyon and smiled.

"Goodbye, Jack," she said softly, her words carried away by the wind. She turned and headed back down the trail, a smile firmly on her face. She needed to hurry. The girls would be waiting.