Simply Sinful

CHAPTER EIGHT

THE POLICE STATION was quiet. Kayla followed Kane inside and waited in the hall while he met with Captain Reid. She didn’t need to be in the room while the two men talked strategy. Time alone would give her an opportunity to think and come up with a plan of her own. Between the phone call earlier and the lists hidden in the books, the police had an official case, if not specific suspects to go after. Kayla wanted specifics. With or without Kane McDermott, she wanted her life back.

With her headache beginning to ebb, came the ability to think more clearly. Whoever was behind the attack wanted the books and whatever money they thought she had in her possession. Kayla had read enough to know the bad guys were always willing to swap when they were desperate. She held the books, they held important information. By far, hers was more valuable, which gave her the upper hand.

Before she realized what she was doing, she rose to her feet and knocked twice on Captain Reid’s door. Without waiting for a response, she let herself inside. “I have the answer.”

“I don’t recall asking a question.” Captain Reid rose to his feet from behind the metal desk in the corner.

“Trade-off,” she explained. “You know whoever attacked me will call back and when he does, I’ll offer him the books.”

“In exchange for…?” Captain Reid picked up on her earlier statement.

“Information. I know my aunt was innocent and I want to prove it.”

“No.”

At the sound of Kane’s voice, Kayla turned. He leaned against an adjoining wall in a deceptively lazy stance. The muscles bunched beneath his shirt and his jaw was clenched hard. He glared from beneath hooded eyes. She didn’t have to hear him speak to know he wasn’t pleased with her suggestion.

“As long as she’s willing, McDermott, she’s our best option.” The older man gestured to the metal-frame chair. “Have a seat.”

At least Captain Reid hadn’t shot down her idea immediately, despite what Kane wanted. Kayla lowered herself into the chair. “I want my business and my family name cleared.” She wanted to feel in control of both herself and her life once more.

Kane shook his head. “Clearing you is my job,” he reminded her. One he hadn’t done a great job of accomplishing so far. But things were heating up and he was ready. No way he’d allow Kayla to set herself up as a target. “Use a drop or a police decoy.”

“In which case we get the errand boy and not the people involved,” the captain said.

“I’ll lean on him,” Kane muttered. “Hard.”

“He’ll talk if he thinks he’s not being threatened.” Kayla spoke up. “And what’s less threatening than a woman he already roughed up?”

Kane didn’t like the enthusiasm in her voice, liked the reminder of the guy’s hands around her neck even less. He glanced over, taking in her cheeks flushed with excitement and the determination in her green eyes, and stifled a groan. Back on her feet, Kayla Luck was a force to be reckoned with.

What happened to the quiet woman who liked cozy restaurants, a traveling salesman and books? Even as he wondered, he already knew the answer. She lurked beneath the intriguing woman in form-fitting jeans and a tight, sexy top. A steady rush of adrenaline pumped through his veins. Even this strong-willed version of Kayla excited him in ways he had yet to understand. He’d never run into a woman who challenged him on so many levels. Who dared to assert her authority at the expense of his own. He might respect her independence, but he’d be damned if he’d let her risk her life to get it back. He shook his head. “No meeting. No way.”

She braced her hands on her legs and jumped up from her seat. “It’s not your decision.” She turned to his superior. “Is it?” she asked Reid.

“Ultimately, no.”

Kane shot daggers at his boss, but the man shrugged his shoulders. “The lady asked a question, McDermott. I’m just answering.”

Kayla’s smile widened. “Then I want in.”

“What the hell do you mean, you want in? This isn’t some action movie, it’s real life.” Exasperated, Kane ran a hand through his hair.

“Right. It’s my life and you guys have shredded it to hell and back. I want to do this.”

“There is no this.” Kane glanced at Captain Reid for backup, certain the older man wouldn’t have patience for a civilian plan of action. But he looked more amused than annoyed, which only served to anger Kane more. “No.”

“Yes.” Kayla folded her arms in front of her.

Despite the serious circumstances, his gaze followed the movement. He took in the press of her forearms against her chest, the rise of her full breasts, visible in the V of her shirt. He knew damn well how that soft flesh felt in his hands, how sweet it tasted in his mouth. He swallowed, but his throat had grown dry.

“Sorry to interrupt this amusing show, but we’ve got some decisions to make.” Reid paced the small area behind his desk. “First, we decipher the books.”

“I can do that,” Kayla said.

“So can Tucker,” Kane muttered.

“Why pull extra manpower on something I can do myself?” Looking too pleased with herself, once again Kayla glanced at the captain for confirmation.

“She’s got a point, McDermott. Besides, with you watching her every minute, what can go wrong?”

Kane hadn’t mentioned to his boss that he’d lost Kayla for one solid hour because of raging hormones and foolish trust. He wasn’t about to do so now.

“And then?” Kayla asked. “What if he calls again?”

“I handle it.”

She scowled.

“We’ll tap your phones and see what turns up,” Reid said.

“The last call came from a pay phone,” Kane said. He had no doubt the next one would, too.

The captain shrugged. “If he calls, improvise. Go with the moment.” He looked at Kane. “You need backup, let me know.”

In other words, if the opportunity presented itself and Kayla was still willing, let her in. Kane grabbed the bag of books in one fist, Kayla’s hand in the other and headed for the door. He knew damn well his boss had a point. He usually did. Kane respected Reid’s judgment and looked up to the older man, but he disagreed with his call on this one. Violently disagreed. Kayla might be their best option for ending this thing quick, but he didn’t like setting her up as a target. Just the thought made him ice-cold all over.

He picked up his stride. Making his way through the precinct, he ignored the stares of the other cops on duty.

“Where are you dragging me?” She stumbled over her feet in an effort to keep up.

Kane slowed his pace. “Home.”

“So you can yell in private?”

There were many things he wanted to do with Kayla. Yelling wasn’t one of them. He stopped midstep and glanced over his shoulder.

She met his gaze with a determined one of her own. “You want an argument, I’m ready. Because you can’t talk me out of this.”

“I don’t want to fight with you, sweetheart.”

She narrowed her eyes in obvious confusion.

“Then what do you want?” Kayla asked.

The scene in the library replayed itself in his mind. She didn’t think he wanted her. He did. With a need so deep and intense it would have scared him, if he were capable of rational thought around her.

He brushed a soft strand of hair off her cheek. Her pupils dilated at the brief contact.

What did he want? The question hovered between them. Kane knew the answer, just as he knew she needed more. But he couldn’t control his need for her any more than he could control the outcome of this case. The most he could do was guide things in the direction he wanted and hope for the best.

He turned to Kayla and answered. “To finish what we started earlier.”

OF ALL THE ARROGANT, self-assured, conceited statements, Kane’s was at the top of the list. Kayla chopped salad ingredients with more force than necessary, sending tomato juice and seeds flying onto the backsplash against the kitchen wall. To finish what we started earlier.

As if she’d allow it without question. Not that she didn’t want to sleep with him again. She did. But that was her body talking, not her mind. A ribbon of warmth curled through her stomach each time he walked into the room. What other proof of desire did she need? However, more important things were at stake than raging hormones. Her life, for one. Her business, for another. And, finally, her future.

It came down to a balance of power, Kayla thought. He thought he could control the situation and her. First by withholding sex. Then, by preventing her from helping to wrap up this mess with Charmed! And now, by informing her he intended to pick up where they’d left off earlier. More like where he’d left off.

Everything with Kane revolved around his choices and his whims. Well, no more. Someone had to show Kane McDermott he couldn’t always be in control. He might not like her plan to uncover her uncle’s illegal dealings, but his superior obviously had. Kayla hadn’t looked to deliberately thwart Kane, even if that had been the ultimate result. She wasn’t looking to be deliberately contrary now, either. But he was about to find out seducing Kayla wasn’t as easy as it had been before.

She still wanted to reach him on a deeper level, but she’d been wrong to think sex was the means. He’d ended up taking control of the situation by giving without letting her do the same. He would soon learn that he couldn’t control her in bed or out. The detective was about to discover she had a mind and some requirements of her own first.

She added the salad bowl and tongs to the table, set with two places. “Dinner’s ready.” She called loudly because he’d been dozing in front of the television set in the family room. Neither one of them had gotten much sleep last night, and because they wanted to go through the books tonight, they’d agreed to rest for an hour before dinner. Kayla had been too worked up to rest.

Kane walked into the cozy kitchen she’d decorated with her sister. He’d pulled off the faded sweatshirt earlier. His rumpled T-shirt looked comfortable, slept-in and extremely sexy. He was a man who wore anything well, and her pulse skyrocketed just having him near. Not a good sign, considering she planned to keep a physical distance.

He paused by one of the empty chairs, taking in the kitchen cluttered with pots, pans and cooking ingredients. “I thought we were bringing in.”

“And I told you I prefer home-cooked to takeout. Have a seat.”

He eased himself into the cushioned chair. “You didn’t need to cook for me.”

She’d wanted to. As much to vent her frustration over his take-charge attitude, as to get back some semblance of normalcy in her home. She’d also wanted to give Kane a taste of real life, two people sharing a meal and talking over dinner. Since he bolted at the first sign of intimacy, she doubted he’d ever had the experience before.

“I hope you like sirloin.” She placed their plates on the table.

He leaned forward in his seat. “This smells great. The last time I had a home-cooked meal was at the captain’s house last Christmas.”

She could believe that. The man was the ultimate loner. He’d mentioned his mother’s suicide but had omitted many details about his father. Kayla didn’t think now was the time to ask, but with the right opening, she would.

“I admit I don’t have the time to cook all that often, but every once in a while my stomach rebels against takeout. Then I roll up my sleeves and dig in.” She cut into her rare steak and juice oozed onto the plate.

She glanced at him, catching him eyeing her plate in barely hidden disgust. “I made yours well-done.” At his raised eyebrows, she grinned. “Educated guess. I couldn’t imagine you eating anything that still looked alive.”

“Good call.” He finished his first taste. “And good steak. So why all the fast food? I’d have thought your sister, the cooking expert, handled kitchen duty.”

“When she’s around, but her school hours and jobs are pretty irregular, so I’m often on my own. Cooking’s not my thing. It’s hers.”

Kane kicked back in his chair, studying her over steepled fingers. “You’re very different people, that much I realized immediately.”

His lazy gaze zeroed in on hers, causing her body temperature to spiral. The tight top that had felt liberating when she’d chosen it, suddenly felt confining. The heat pumping inside her couldn’t be denied or ignored. She wet her dry mouth with a sip of water before attempting to speak. “Cat and I don’t share the same passions, but…”

She didn’t get any further. His eyes darkened and the word passion hung heavy in the air between them. Considering she’d seen him in the throes of that particular emotion, Kayla couldn’t mistake the desire reflected in his gaze. Nor did she want to.

Needing control and wanting Kane weren’t mutually exclusive. She took a bite of her meal, but didn’t taste a thing.

He did the same. “Incredible,” he said in a husky voice. He gestured to the food on his plate, but his hooded gaze never wandered from her face.

She felt a burning flush rise to her cheeks. “I thought you were a steak and potatoes kind of guy, so I made…steak and potatoes.” She was rambling because his intense stare awakened her desires for so much more than food. Desires she’d promised herself to control until the time was right.

“You seem to know me pretty well,” he said.

Superficial information, Kayla thought, and it wasn’t enough. She wanted to know more. She shrugged. “Instinct. Something you cops must believe in.”

“It’s kept me alive more than once.”

She smiled. “And now mine is keeping you fed.” She pointed to the meal with her fork. “It’s not gourmet, but it’s decent food.” The time had come to push some barriers. “Mama couldn’t do more than boil a pot of water, but somehow, we did okay. Catherine’s been the cook in the house…ever since the restaurant owner gave her that job to work off the unpaid bill.” She glanced at Kane. “So who did the cooking in your house?”

He speared another piece of meat. “I made sure we didn’t starve, my uncle made sure we weren’t thirsty.”

She blinked, not yet comprehending.

“Alcohol, sweetheart. The man guzzled the stuff whenever he got the chance.” His face was a blank, uncaring mask.

Kayla suspected he wasn’t even aware of the change. He’d had too many years of practice, she thought sadly. “What about your father?” she asked.

He shrugged. “Wouldn’t know. He took a hike when I was five. Just like your old man.”

She nodded. Though she hadn’t known much about Kane’s family history, she’d always sensed he’d grown up on his own. Sensed he, too, knew what it was like to be alone. But she hadn’t realized how very much they had in common.

At least she’d had her aunt and her sister to give her a sense of family, of belonging. He’d had no one. “It wasn’t always easy,” she said. “But we got by.”

“Same here.” Having cleaned his plate when she wasn’t looking, he leaned back in his seat. “Your sister might be the chef in the family, but you’re pretty good yourself.”

Though she appreciated the compliment, she recognized the change of subject for what it was. “Thank you.”

“No sweat.” He rose and began stacking the dishes.

She shook her head. “I’ve got it.”

“No. You take it easy while I finish up in here. We’ve got a long night ahead of us.”

“The books,” she said softly.

His expression darkened. “Yeah, the books.” He turned away.

She followed him to the sink, dishes in hand. His shirt strained against the powerful muscles in his back. They’d once rippled beneath her fingertips. She exhaled a sigh. If by a long night, he meant one fraught with sexual tension, she agreed.

His abrupt turn caught her unaware. Suddenly she wasn’t faced with the man’s back, but his face. His eyes, a turbulent wash of emotions, none of which she could decipher, settled on hers. Razor stubble darkened his cheeks, matching his current mood.

Her fingertips curled around the dish in her hand.

“I want to get one thing straight.” He eased the ceramic plate out of her grip and placed it in the sink behind him.

Nothing stood between herself and Kane, no barrier existed between his magnetic pull and her tempted body. Without the small dish in her hand, she felt exposed…naked. “What is it?” she asked.

“I’m here because I have a job to do.”

“Tell me something I don’t know,” she muttered.

“But that doesn’t mean I don’t want to be here.”

Kayla forced a smile. “You want me. I think we’ve covered this territory before.”

“Yeah, I do. But my job means keeping you safe and, despite what I said earlier, that means keeping my distance.”

“I didn’t know one thing had anything to do with the other.” Just twenty minutes ago, Kayla had listed every reason in her mind why she wouldn’t sleep with Kane again. Hearing him agree with her, however, hadn’t factored into her plan and hurt more than she would have imagined. Now she found herself wanting to argue against her own logic.

This battle of wills they had going was beginning to wear on her. Coupled with the constant sexual pull, the result was a roller-coaster ride of emotions. She wanted the battle to end, but only Kane’s capitulation on all levels could do that. He had to trust in her-he had to trust in himself.

Funny, she thought. For years, she’d lacked similar faith in herself. But a few days with Kane, and she’d begun to regain the inner strength and belief she’d been lacking. He did that for her. And regardless of the outcome of them, she could never regret the time they’d shared.

But that didn’t mean she was about to relinquish control.

“One thing has everything to do with the other,” he said.

Kayla froze in place. She sensed the import of his statement, understood this was as close a view inside Kane’s mind as she was likely to get. So she listened.

“There’s something in life called an edge…at least there is in my life. Without it, I’m no good as a cop and even worse as a man. Every time I’ve let my guard down in any way, things go wrong.”

The guilt thing again. She shook her head. “You aren’t responsible for what’s happened to me.”

“That’s not what you said earlier.”

“You know that wasn’t what I meant. I wasn’t blaming you.”

“Then maybe you should. Maybe both of you should,” he muttered.

“Who, Kane?” she asked quietly.

He shut his eyes before speaking. Deep grooves formed at the corners, testament to how difficult this upcoming admission would be. “I always came straight home from school. My mother was fragile, and she relied on me walking in the door at the same time every day. Even before my dad took off, routine was important to her. She got up, washed her hands, ate breakfast, washed her hands, watched TV, washed her hands, I came home, she…”

“Washed her hands,” Kayla finished for him.

He met her gaze.

“She sounds obsessive compulsive.”

He shrugged. “I guess she was, but I didn’t know the clinical term back then. She had good days and bad days, up days and down days.” He drew a deep breath. “If I came home from school when I was supposed to, she took her medication on time. And the one day I didn’t…”

She walked in front of a moving bus. Kane didn’t have to speak for Kayla to hear. His body shook in reaction to his unspoken words. She reached out and took his hand, silently offering comfort.

The man shouldered more responsibility than was necessary, more guilt than she’d ever imagined. “You said she had good days and bad days, Kane. Isn’t it possible she didn’t kill herself, but got confused, or wasn’t looking? Did she leave a note?”

He shook his head. “Does it really matter? If I’d been home, it wouldn’t have happened.” His warm hand curled around hers. “And if I’d been thinking about my job and not preoccupied with my feelings for you, you wouldn’t have been attacked.”

Kayla tried to sort through his words, to hear past his misplaced guilt. He hadn’t let go of the boy who felt responsible for his only parent. He couldn’t accept it wasn’t an eleven-year-old’s job to be the adult of the household. While growing up, she and Catherine had borne too many adult responsibilities of their own, and felt an out-of-proportion responsibility for each other. Kayla could relate to Kane’s life.

The emotional barriers, the distance, and the all-consuming need to control things around him-they all made a strange sort of sense to her now. She wasn’t sure she could ever undo the scars embedded in his past, no matter how much she wanted to.

In the library, he’d told her he was doing all he could do. That had to be enough. When the case was over, if he wanted to stay, she’d welcome him with open arms. If he wanted to walk away, she’d let him go.

He deserved to know he had that kind of freedom.