CHAPTER 19

Damon watched as her eyes fluttered shut, and almost im mediately, her breathing became soft and even. She was exhausted.

He smiled and carefully slid his arms underneath her. As he picked her up off the bed, she moaned in protest.

“Shhh,” he soothed. “I want you with me, Serena mine. You can rest as soon as I’ve made you comfortable.”

And he did want her with him. The ferocity of his desire to have her near him startled him. But like her, he was indulging in a fantasy. It wasn’t real, no matter that he might wish differently.

He carried her from the bedroom and toward the spacious living room where a fire burned in the hearth. Her plush pallet had already been arranged at the foot of his armchair and was several feet from the fire.

Kneeling, he set her naked body on the down-filled, body-sized cushion. She murmured sleepily, but curled into a ball and fell back into a deep sleep. He stroked a hand through her hair, pulling it away from her face. Then he let his fingers glide down her lean body to her hip and finally to her pale buttocks.

The flesh-colored plug split the cheeks of her behind, and he hardened slightly at the idea of thrusting his dick where the plug currently resided.

Rising to his feet, he collected his laptop from the coffee table and settled into the armchair. He kicked off his shoes and sent them sliding across the floor and away from where Serena lay.

He stretched his legs until his feet touched her slender back. Absently, he rubbed his toes up her spine and into the silkiness of her hair. He liked touching her, having any contact with her he could.

He opened his laptop and left his feet lightly resting on her side. As he worked through his e-mails, he occasionally glanced up, his gaze seeking Serena out. Every once in a while, she sighed and her body rose and fell harder before a sleepy, contented sound whispered past her lips and she settled back down again.

When he was down to his last e-mail, his cell phone rang. Frowning, he yanked it up without looking at the LCD and punched the on button so the ring wouldn’t disturb Serena.

“Damon,” he said shortly.

“Damon, hi, this is Faith.”

His expression eased and he relaxed in his chair. “Faith, it’s a pleasure to hear from you. How are you? How is Gray?”

“We’re both fine.”

He could hear the smile in her voice, could envision her sweet features.

“How is Serena?” Faith asked.

There was slight hesitation behind the question as though she wasn’t certain how to voice her concern. He smiled and glanced down at Serena even as he rubbed his foot lightly over her hip.

“She’s asleep at my feet,” he replied.

“Your feet? Good grief, Damon, you really do take this slave thing a bit far. I thought you went for collaring and tying them to your bed?”

He chuckled. “Only at night.”

He heard her mutter something under her breath.

“Serena is fine, Faith. Surely you didn’t think I’d mistreat her.”

“No, of course not!” She quickly defended herself. “I hope that isn’t what you think. I can’t imagine you ever hurting a woman. Not intentionally, anyway.”

Damon’s brow rose. “I’m not even going to ask.”

Faith paused for a long moment. And when she finally spoke, there was a glint of steel in her tone. A direct contradiction to her usually sweet manner.

“Look, Damon, you’re my friend. I count you among my dearest friends.”

He smiled. He considered her a dear friend as well.

“But so is Serena,” she continued. “And I’m a little worried. About you both.”

“There’s no need for you to concern yourself, Faith. Serena and I are consenting adults, and we’re both very aware of what’s at stake and what isn’t.”

Faith made a sound of impatience. “You hate games, Damon. You of all people like things ordered and to your liking. I dare-say you’re quite spoiled and used to having what you want when you want it. This whole fantasy thing . . . I just hope you aren’t going to end up expecting something from it that Serena can’t or won’t give you.”

“I do believe you’re trying to protect my heart,” Damon said in amusement. “I’m a big boy. I can take care of myself.”

“I just don’t want either of you hurt,” she said softly. “Especially you, Damon.”

A flood of warmth entered his chest and bathed his insides. Faith . . . she was like a ray of sunshine on a cold, gloomy day. There wasn’t another way to describe her. She had a heart of gold and was tenaciously loyal to the people she loved. Even to her detriment, as Gray Montgomery would certainly attest.

“I appreciate your concern, Faith. Truly I do. But this is between me and Serena,” he said gently. “We’ve both made our terms very clear. No one is entering this blind.”

Faith gave a small laugh. “That was a tactful way of telling me to mind my own business.”

“Yes, it was,” he said with a smile.

“Okay, I can take a hint. I worry about you, Damon. That’s all I wanted to say.”

“Your worry is wasted on me.”

He smiled as she told him again what a dear friend he was and then they rang off. He was still smiling as he put the phone down between his leg and the side of the chair.

Quietly, he closed his laptop and laid it aside on the end table next to his chair. For a long while, he stared into the flickering flames in the hearth and absorbed the sensation of being content in his home, a beautiful woman at his feet. He was . . . happy.

A few moments later, his housekeeper Carol entered the room, clearing her throat to draw his attention. He looked up to see her standing in the doorway, her eyes cast discreetly away from Serena.

“Is there anything you need, Damon?” she asked.

“I’d like a glass of wine for now,” he said after a moment’s consideration. “In an hour’s time, I’d like dinner served here in the living room.”

Serena would be hungry, and he easily pictured her comfortably settled between his knees, her head on his lap as he fed her with his fingers. Then he’d stroke her hair and they’d talk while they relaxed and enjoyed the evening. Later . . . He wouldn’t get into later just yet. Sitting with a hard-on and nothing to ease it wasn’t exactly fun.

After Carol retreated, Damon reached for the novel he was halfway through and opened it to read, after another glance at Serena.

He was pleased by the trust she’d granted him thus far. She had reservations, as he’d expected, but she’d handled them bravely and with grace. She wasn’t a coward, nor was she a quitter.

And she pleased him. How she pleased him. He’d told her often enough, for he wanted her to be secure in his approval, but there was no explanation for the surge of pleasure her presence brought him. He wasn’t sure he wanted her to know the extent of his somewhat muddled feelings. Hell, he wasn’t even going to try and sort through them.

He frowned as he remembered Faith’s concerns. Her worry hadn’t been for Serena. It had been for him. Was he so transparent? Had he no strength to enjoy a brief affair with no emotional involvement?

His frown eased, and he became more pensive than irritated. His emotions were already involved. He’d never viewed sex as a stark, mechanical process that two mating bodies participated in, absent everything else. Even when he knew there was no future for him and the woman he took to his bed, he still treated her with respect, and he kept a small part of his heart reserved for each one. He knew all their names, what they looked like, what they enjoyed, what their dreams and aspirations were. Even when those dreams took them beyond him.

Each time, he steeled himself going in, knowing that what he enjoyed with his partners couldn’t last, and at the end of the affair, he’d viewed their parting with only a small amount of regret and sadness.

He stared down at Serena over the top of the book that he still hadn’t read a word of today. The idea of her moving on did odd things to him. Inspired a sort of panic deep in his soul. A stirring, a protest, a cry of a man for his mate.

He shook his head to rid him of such absurdities. This was sex. Sex with emotion but still just sex and fantasy. It wasn’t real. None of it was real.

Letting go of Serena would be hard, but he would do it. Keeping a woman tied to him when she had no wish to be there wasn’t something he wanted any more than he wanted to contemplate the idea that he’d never find a woman who could love and accept him even knowing what he’d demand from her.

Carol returned with his glass of wine, and he sat sipping as he stared into the fire. His book, now forgotten, was laid carelessly over his lap, marking a place he had no intention of returning to.

Feeling the need to touch Serena, he slid the balls of his feet over her satiny skin, tracing the line of her spine and then the curve of her hip and her small waist. Her hair spread out behind her, a splash of midnight, inky and smooth, like liquid silk.

He would definitely see to her hair every day. It was a joy he had no intention of denying himself. He would be the one to wash it when she bathed, and he would dry it and comb through every single strand.

The fire had died down to a bed of glowing coals, but he couldn’t make himself get up to go add more logs. He was content where he sat, his woman across his feet where he could feel every breath she took, every little sigh and twitch.

Shadows crossed the room as dusk fell, sweeping softly over fading daylight. A single lamp illuminated the room, casting a glow over Serena’s sleeping form. As if wakened by the warm fingers of light, she stirred beneath his feet.

He watched her shake off the web of sleep and slowly raise her head. She turned immediately as though in search of him. Their gazes connected and satisfaction coiled deep in his chest that her first waking thought had been of him.

“Come to me,” he whispered, holding out his hand to her.

She blinked away the last vestiges of fatigue, and her eyes brightened and glowed in the soft light. She got to her knees and slid her hand into his.

For a moment he merely enjoyed that first touch, the tingle that slithered up his arm, bathing his skin in prickles of awareness. Then he pulled her upward and coaxed her onto his lap.

She settled into his chest, snuggling like a kitten seeking warmth. He wrapped both arms around her, holding her close. To his surprise, her lips nuzzled against his neck, pressing tiny kisses to his skin.

“Are you hungry?” he murmured.

“Starved.”

“Carol will be bringing our food any time now.”

He slid one hand over the curve of her hip and to the softness of her buttocks. His fingers glanced off the plug, and she tightened against him.

“Does it hurt you?” he asked as he traced the edge of the plastic.

She shook her head against him.

“I’ll remove it when we go to bed,” he said.

Unable to resist, he brushed his lips across her forehead. In response, she tilted her face up, a clear invitation for him to taste her lips.

Sweet, like licking a drop of syrup from a spoon. Her taste was familiar to him yet each time was like the first. Exciting and electrifying.

Her fingers fluttered to his jaw, stroking and touching him as he deepened the kiss. When she started to withdraw, he put his hand to cover hers, pushing her back to his face. He enjoyed her touch. Needed it.

A part of him long buried beneath ice thawed whenever her warmth enveloped him. The aching part of his soul eased. She was his comfort when he’d long decided he would have none.

A sound behind them caused him to pull away. He glanced behind him to see Carol standing in the doorway with a dinner cart.

He motioned her forward then arranged Serena in a position that afforded her the most modesty, despite his earlier assertion that she would grow to ignore the presence of others.

Carol poured wine into the glasses, uncovered the plates and then briskly walked back out of the living room.

The enticing aroma of the food wafted through his nostrils. Next to him, Serena shifted and sighed in contentment as she too caught the smell.

He reached out to pull the cart a little closer to the chair. As he’d requested, Carol had prepared an array of finger foods. Shrimp. Decadent pieces of scallop and lobster drenched in butter. Crabcakes and grilled salmon.

“Mmm, I love seafood,” Serena said.

He took a piece of the lobster and held it to her mouth. He coaxed her lips open and left the morsel on her tongue. Before he could take another piece of the food, she sat up and reached for the plate to choose an offering.

She picked a shrimp and held it to his mouth. He opened and allowed her to feed it to him, her fingers brushing like fire across his tongue.

They fed each other in silence, taking turns offering food from their fingers. Their gazes never left each other for long, only to take the next bite and return with a smoldering blaze.

When at last the food was gone, Serena laid her head on his shoulder with a contented sigh.

“Full?” he asked as he stroked her hair.

“Mmm-hmm.”

“You sound . . . content.”

She raised her head just so she could see him. His hand stayed tangled in her hair and continued its downward trek.

“I am.”

Her husky sweet voice stirred a longing inside him that had nothing to do with sex or the urge to bury himself deep inside her. It was more. Something just out of his reach that he was at a loss to explain.

“I’m glad.”

He pulled her back to him, letting her softness mold to his body. Against his neck, she yawned and snuggled sleepily into his arms.

“Why don’t I take you to the bedroom and remove the plug? You can have a long soaking bath, I’ll wash your hair and we can have an early night.”

She stilled against him and then once again, she pulled away to stare at him with confused eyes.

“You’re asking?”

He smiled. “Not everything is a dictate, Serena mine. I’m a reasonable man when it suits me.”

She answered his smile with one of her own. “Then yes, I’d love a long, hot bath.”

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