The Tantric Principle

Chapter Six

“You got it.”

Arianna looked up at Tim. He stood in the doorway with a half smile on his face. “Got what?” she asked.

He shook his head in amazement. “The promotion. Un-frikkin' believable. Sanders promoted you.”

The file dropped from her fingers as his words shot through her brain and squeezed with clarity. “You’re joking.”

“Not. He wants you to lead the team for the Rosebud account. Damn, Arianna, he’s sending you to Chicago.”

The reality of her situation crashed over her. Sheer excitement fought with pure emotion.

Grant. She would have to leave Grant.

Arianna pushed the thought aside and stood up. “Is this official? How do you know?” she demanded as she made her way through the corridor to her manager’s office. “Don’t start this crap with me that a rumor was started and I have to keep it quiet. You know I don’t play that game well.”

He trotted after her. “Don’t know what you have against the grapevine. It works for me.

Never wrong either. You can’t just barge into his office and announce you heard a rumor.

Arianna, wait till he offers you the position, for God’s sake.” She knocked on the door and tossed him a cheeky grin. “Too late. I won’t mention your name.” Tim’s groan echoed in the background as she shut the door behind her.

She was moving to Chicago.

Arianna sat in her office with her blinds drawn, struggling to process the last few hours.

Tim had told the truth. It was hers. As the head of the Creative Services Department, she’d closed a few big accounts at G & B, but the Rosebud account was in a different league. She assumed Sanders would go with one of the more senior leaders for such an important victory.

But he didn’t. He’d taken a chance on her, and now she was the youngest executive in the company to be piloting an account out of New York.

She’d spent the last five years working toward one goal: to showcase her talent and head a big account. Chicago was the key. She would be in charge of the whole damn division. The lead person on the biggest advertising deal of the century.

They were creating an ad for the Superbowl. Just a few precious seconds of television exposure, but during the most watched game of the year.

Millions of dollars were at stake, months of preparation for the one pitch that would land G & B into the big leagues. The future stretched before her like the yellow brick road of Oz.

The knock on her door caused her to jump. “Yes?” she called out.

Grant opened the door and stepped in. “I thought I’d stop by to check out the corporate world. Do you think if I passed out business cards I would get some new students?” She laughed. “Hell, yes. If Tricia let you in, you must have seen her facial tick. I think corporate sponsors could open up a whole new world for you.” He looked thoughtful. “You’re right. I never thought to expand into the corporate environment, but it’s a whole untapped market.”

“What are you doing here?”

Onyx eyes heated and gleamed. “I wanted to see you. I know you’re working late for the next few nights so I thought I’d stop by.”

“I’m glad you did.” She crossed to him and linked her arms around his neck. He moved in to kiss her long and deep, his tongue lazily exploring her slick mouth with the command of a lover who knows every inch of his mate. She let herself go and sank into the embrace, automatically fitting her hips to cradle his, her breasts flattened against his hard chest. The familiar energy sparked around them, then settled to a low hum.

“I like your place.”

She let her gaze slide over her office. Arianna had been proud to get a small space of her own, and had to work her way up the ranks from a cubicle to sharing an office with many, to her own. The bright red splashes of color lent a creative air to the space with the wine carpeting and bold watercolors on the wall. Dark cherry wood accents with the desk and matching chair added richness. A lush palm tree stood in the corner, its leafy greens blending with the stark simplicity of the room. Framed photos of inspiring words and mottos hung from the walls.

Grant paused at one of the quotes. “Dare to Suck.” One dark brow lifted. “Very poetic.”

“It is. You gotta love Aerosmith. If you don’t, I think our affair will be doomed.”

“Love the guy.”

“Good choice,” she said. “He talked about songwriting and freedom. If you’re going to shoot for mastery, you have to dare to suck first. It clicked with me.” He gave her another hard kiss. “Amazing. I probably could have quoted a guru master in a paragraph. I think you covered it with three words. Would you like to come speak at my next conference?”

“Only if I get the same fringe benefits I did in Boston.”

“Part of my compensation package.” He dropped a small picnic basket on the gleaming wood. “I brought you a late supper so you wouldn’t be tempted to do the fast food thing.” Pleasure speared through her while she peeked in the basket. “Hmmm, brie, crackers, fruit, olives.”

“I just wanted to drop it off, I know you’re busy.”

Arianna took in his long corded length clad in faded jeans and a black t-shirt with the word OM on the front. His hair was raked back from his face and set off the slash of cheekbones and fierce brows. He was her own personal warrior and she was getting dangerously close to. . . .

Danger.

He brought her food, but didn’t expect her to re-arrange her schedule. He seemed to admire who she was, and what she'd accomplished without assuming she’d change for a relationship.

Arianna snaked her fingers through his and pulled him down to the carpet. She hiked up her skirt and kicked off her heels, settling herself comfortably on the floor. “Eat with me. I need a break.”

He sat cross legged beside her and emptied the basket. “So, tell me exactly what you do,” he said. “I hear advertising and I think about the movies. Posterboards, big accounts, long hours.”

Arianna popped a wheat cracker with Brie in her mouth, then spoke. “Pretty much like the movies. At least, my job is. My main title is the manager of the Creative Services Department. I lead a team which comes up with the ideas for ads, print, television, radio, internet, etcetera. I deal with copyright, graphic artists, and a thousand personalities. But my mainstay is coming up with a killer idea and then selling it. Products and companies are always looking for branding. The next big catchy theme song, like the Gap commercials or the Geico gecko.”

“Hmmm, maybe I should hire you for my yoga school.”

She grinned wickedly and reached for a grape. “Got about $500,000 in available funds for one ad?”

He choked. “Crap. I guess I need to stick with the pennysaver.” Arianna laughed. “Guess so. Though if you want to branch out, I can help you with the marketing.”

He smiled at her with pure pleasure. “You’d do that, wouldn’t you?”

“Of course.”

He seemed to file the knowledge away and continued. “So what account are you working on now?”

Guilt nipped at her conscience. She wanted to tell him about Chicago but she needed more time to think and process the outcome. She stretched her legs out in front of her and caught the look on his face. She teased him by deliberately spreading her legs. His gaze snagged on the lines of her lacy pink underwear. “I’ll tell you what account I just closed. Do you see what I’m wearing?”

“I’m a little distracted by what’s underneath.”

“That’s what I’m talking about. Rosebud lingerie.”

One black brow shot up. “You’re kidding? That’s getting as popular as Victoria’s Secret.

Isn’t that the commercial with the woman half dressed ready to get spanked? Then she pulls her head up and whispers “Rosebud. Get your man to do anything.”

“That’s it.”

He blinked. “Did you come up with that line?”

She nodded and looked quite proud of herself. “It was a bit of a risk and I almost took the bullet. Thought it could be too sexual, but boundaries are being pushed and we can’t be afraid to test them.”

He shook his head in admiration. “You’re good.”

“Thanks. But there’s always someone better waiting to take over my job. You’re only as good as your last win. That’s why I ended up in your yoga class. I needed some balance.” Grant stared at the woman in front of him and felt his chest tighten in an age old response he wanted to avoid. Wine red strands of hair fell past her jaw with a glossy sheen as she turned her head. She popped another grape through pouty red lips that were too big for the features on her face, yet worked to pull a man right in. Her eyes were a moody shade of green that reminded him of storm tossed seas and mossy hills, quick with laughter and temper. She wore a buttery yellow top that looked soft to the touch, and molded to her full, high breasts. Her chocolate brown skirt showed off lean, tanned legs. Arianna Devlin was a firestorm in a feminine package.

She constantly surprised him. Her ambition, her heart, and her honesty. She had created one of the biggest advertising campaigns in a cut throat industry, yet sat with him on her office floor, legs open, eating brie and laughing like it was any other day.

He was falling in love with her.

The knowledge wrecked him and ripped him to shreds. Dear God, he had no time for this nonsense. He wanted to have a hot affair for as long as it lasted, then part amicably. He should have known. From the first day, the woman had never inspired tame emotions. She’d cut through his relaxed control and made him want to rip off her clothes and thrust into her with possession.

He wanted to own her in the basic way a man loves a woman. Such primitive feelings were foreign to him. Even his first wife commanded a loving sweetness and protectiveness, but never these darker emotions. Primal instincts buried deep for all of these years rose. Instincts he didn’t want to deal with.

“Grant? What’s wrong?”

He opened his mouth and almost blurted out the words. Truth for truth. He loved her, goddamnit, and they would both have to accept it. He almost said it. Then—

“Oops, sorry!”

Grant turned toward the door as a tall man with sandy colored hair stood before them. He looked caught off guard, then instantly curious. Grant knew right then and there he had been lovers with Arianna. When his gaze swung to hers, he noticed she looked wary, almost as if she was afraid he would guess and judge her for it. Or as if she was hiding something.

He pushed the thought away and concentrated on being polite as she introduced him.

“So, you’re the yoga guy,” Tim said. Grant almost winced at the awful term but managed to nod. “I thought so. Maybe all that deep breathing was worth it after all. Some promotion, huh?”

Arianna visibly flinched, then seemed to force a smile. “I didn’t tell him yet, Tim.”

“Crap. Sorry, again. Didn’t mean to interrupt, just wanted to see if you were pulling in Cindy to work with us tonight.”

“Sure, I’m up for some brainstorming.”

“Done. Nice to meet you.”

Grant watched the man stride out in his perfectly tailored suit and decided he didn’t like him. He studied Arianna, who looked way too interested in finding the perfect black olive, and suspected something was wrong.

“Promotion?”

Her laugh seemed forced. “Yes, I didn’t get to tell you. Seems the Rosebud account got me the recognition I wanted. They’re moving me up the ranks.” He pondered her statement and made sure he spoke mildly. “You don’t seem too excited about it.”

Her gaze swung up and locked on his. His gut clenched with anticipation for something she would say, something disturbing, something that might change his life. But she only smiled, soft and slightly sad. “I am excited. I just found out a few hours ago so I think I’m in shock.”

“It’s a big deal, isn’t it?”

Arianna nodded. “I get to head the account. I’ll be working on a Superbowl ad, so yes, it’s a big deal.”

‘Then we’re going to celebrate. I’m taking you out tomorrow night, if you’re free of course.”

“I’m not.”

“Hot date?”

“Yoga class,” she said.

He moved in and pulled her onto his lap. She expected a kiss, but he managed to tickle her tummy and made her squeal out in surprise. “Cancel it,” he ordered. “Come out with me instead.”

She agreed and his mouth came down on hers.

Arianna expected dark passion and received sweetness. His lips sipped at hers, then dipped inside to play. His tongue stroked her with a heavy languor that made her limbs melt. He explored the satiny wetness of every inch of her mouth, then slowly broke away. She let a sigh of satisfaction slip from her lips. “Ok, we’ll compromise. Class first, then dinner,” she said.

“You drive a hard bargain.”

Her hand slipped from his neck to between his legs to find him pulsing and ready. She squeezed and gave him a wicked smile. “No, but you certainly do.” He threw back his head and laughed. “You’re a hell of a woman, Arianna.” For one brief moment, she felt the energy in the room change. An unanswered statement, a question, hung heavily in the air. She felt as if she was drowning in the dark inkiness of his eyes, pulling her downward, urging her to tell him the truth.

She was in love with him.

She was moving to Chicago.

Arianna swallowed the words and deliberately slid back a few inches, letting her hand drop from his body. Grant seemed to sense her decision and allowed his gaze to cool, allowed her to separate from him. For now.

But she knew it was a warning.

The truth would be coming soon. He’d see to it. She would tell him soon, but for a little longer, she wanted to enjoy being with him without complications. Without decisions or regret.

She just needed more time.

“I better go. You have work to do.” Grant rose and packed up the basket, kissed her good-bye and left. Arianna stared at the closed door for a long time before forcing herself back to work.

There was going to be trouble.

Arianna watched the young Missy with her lover and took a deep breath.

Over the past week, she noticed Missy getting a little too attached to Grant. After their last argument, Arianna decided to let him work it out and not interfere. She trusted him and knew his intentions were honorable. She also trusted his business instincts and felt he would make the right decision.

Except tonight was Tombstone time. High Noon. Arianna was about to stake her turf and Grant was going to have to deal with it. Their celebration dinner had been pushed back a few days due to another tight deadline. Grant had been completely supportive, so they decided to go to dinner tonight after class. She’d just joined the intermediate students and was feeling her way through the group dynamics, going deeper into her practice. Missy was one of the students. She had been deliberately cold toward Arianna, her gaze continuously roving her body as if comparing and judging her inferior. Missy was an excellent student and far in her practices. Her asanas were graceful to watch and she usually served as a model to the others.

Because of her status, she spent more time with Grant than the others. She spoke with him in low, intimate whispers and always placed a hand on his arm. Or grabbed his hand when she laughed as if she had no idea she was doing it. She watched Missy go in and out of his private office as if she had a personal key, and Arianna knew Grant allowed it because he was training her to serve as a mentor to the others.

But Arianna was going to kick her ass, so she would not be needed as a mentor.

She watched her competition from under heavily lidded eyes. The studio was cleaned up and the students had been counseled.

She respected Grant’s decision to keep their relationship a secret, and she didn’t want Missy to discover the truth. Suspecting was a whole different ball game from confirming, and Grant didn’t need any conflict right now.

The willowy blonde plastered herself to Grant’s side as she listened to him speak. She wore a skimpy halter top that emphasized her heavy breasts, and her lycra pants left nothing to the imagination. She had pulled the clip out of her hair, and Arianna spotted heavy makeup on her face, not appropriate for a workout.

Arianna shook her head. Grant was the only man to ever see her both vulnerable and unpolished. Stringy hair, wet from sweat. Make-up run off her face. Arms shaking with exertion and a trucker’s mouth when she couldn’t hold a pose. Sometimes tears when she held a posture long enough to break through some emotional barriers. Not to mention her trouble keeping up her pedicures, which were always exposed with everyone’s feet bare in class. Yet, Missy, seemed polished and manicured and perfumed and. . . ready for action.

Arianna smothered a laugh at the thought, then decided to break up the party.

She reached the couple and enjoyed the spark of warmth that lit Grant’s eyes when he spotted her. “Are you almost ready to go?” she asked casually.

“Absolutely,” he said. “Missy, I would dedicate more time to your meditation. You seem like you’re ready for a breakthrough.”

“I am. I was hoping we could discuss a few things.” Missy raised an eyebrow in her direction. “Would you mind if I stole Grant for a bit longer?” Grant opened his mouth but Arianna interrupted. “I’m sorry, Missy, we were going to catch a bite.” She smiled in apology. “I’m starving from that workout. Can you catch up with him later?”

Missy took a small side step until she was flush against Grant. “Oh, that’s so nice you’re getting something to eat. Can I join you? Would love to discuss the practices more, and maybe Arianna can learn a few more things. I know she’s new.” Silence descended.

Arianna waited for Grant to make a decision. A Mexican stand off had officially been called. If Missy joined them, it would solidify their relationship as friends, and there would be no romantic dinner. But if he did say something, Missy would know the truth and expose their secret.

Missy looked up at Grant with expectation. Arianna waited patiently for her lover to choose.

Grant smiled warmly at Missy. A mentor, a teacher, a friend. Then spoke. “I’m sorry, Missy, I’m taking Arianna out to dinner to celebrate something very special. I made reservations so we won’t be able to have you join us tonight.” He squeezed her hand in reassurance. “But I’ll see you tomorrow during morning class and we’ll have plenty of time to discuss it.” Without hesitation, Grant took Missy’s elbow and led her to the door. “Have a great night.” The blonde literally gaped at the obvious dismissal, and then Arianna spotted a disturbing mix of envy and resolve. She tossed her hair, said something else to Grant, and disappeared.

“Ready?” he asked.”Do you want to use the bathroom to change first or shall I?” She stared at him and realized he had chosen her.

“You told her.”

He waved his hand in dismissal and raked his hair back from his forehead. “Yeah, I thought it was time. She suspected anyway.”

“What if she tells the other students?” Arianna pressed. “I don’t think she was too happy knowing you were dating me.”

Grant nodded. “I know. I guess she’s going to have to get over it and so will the other students. I’m done hiding you.”

Her heart bloomed in full expansion and made a mockery out of the Grinch. Her skin felt suddenly too tight for her body. He pretended to be casual. She knew differently. She knew it took everything Grant had to trust her and their relationship, to let the truth out. Then Arianna realized she had to tell him her own truth. Tonight. She had to tell him she was leaving.

But not now.

Arianna closed the distance between them with a leap, and then she was in his arms. He murmured low and caught her hard as she launched herself through the air. She stabbed all ten fingers into his long hair and pulled his mouth down on hers. His arms snagged around her waist and held her tight as her tongue thrust between his lips and she took him on a wild ride, her fingers pushing up his shirt to caress all those carved muscles in his chest, his arms, his back.

She squeezed his buttocks and with one hard tug, his pants came down with his underwear, exposing his arousal to her hungry hands and travelling fingers.

He managed to do the same to her in a few second and then they were both naked. “No dinner?” he gasped, lifting her up so his cock pressed against her wet opening.

“Screw dinner.”

His mouth came down and laved her breasts, pulled her nipple between his teeth and sucked. She groaned and urged him to go faster, wanting him to lose the fragile thread of his control when he loved her, wanting him to stop holding back. Arianna grasped him between her fingers and worked him up and down, sliding her thumb over his sensitive tip, guiding his length between her thighs.

“Yes, yes, yes,” she chanted, thrusting her hips upward, ready to claim him and both explode over the edge.

“You want this?” he asked, his cock moving into her, sliding inch by precious inch.

Arianna punished him with her fingernails and her teeth. She bit his earlobe, raked the skin over his back, and urged him to come inside her. She wanted, no, needed, him to surrender to her tonight.

“If you want it, tell me. Tell me everything.” His voice was a low growl as he massaged her breasts and teased her clit with the hot flesh of his arousal, getting her so close yet not close enough.

“Put your cock inside me!” she demanded, opening her legs wider, her back pressed against the hard wall, willing him to do it, just do it.

“Not until you come for me. Come. Now. Now!” He grasped her hips, positioned her, and slammed his cock into her wet opening.

Arianna came hard in a rush of wetness, her voice tearing on a scream that cut through the studio. But he wasn’t done, he thrust in and out of her, again and again, lifting her up and up until the second orgasm ripped through her and then she collapsed against the wall, falling against his hot, damp skin, his erection still pulsing inside of her with hot demand. She groaned and admitted defeat again. He didn’t come inside of her. Not until it was on his terms.

The thought worried at her like a mouse with a piece of string, but then he was easing back and forth over her sensitive, clit, slowly, so slowly she didn’t even realize he was moving until the tension built again in delicious intervals, the friction of his cock against the swollen nub so outrageously pleasurable, tears burned her eyes. She fought the fall, not wanting to have another orgasm, and she cursed him, but he just laughed and held her still, working himself inside of her again and again until she came, her flesh pulsing almost painfully from the release.

This time he let her slide down to the floor, still inside of her. Only then did the full emotions hit like a hurtling freight train, and tears leaked from her lids as she surrendered to the final collapse of all of her clever ideas of love and distance and realized Grant Madison had changed her life and she would never be the same.

Grant held her close, stroking back silky strands of her hair from her face as she cried.

The tears dropped slowly on his bare chest and a piece of him broke loose inside of him. Her vulnerability and openness tore him apart. He tried to release his sudden tension as he realized she needed to tell him something, something he wasn’t going to want to hear. Grant calmed his mind by breathing slowly and waited for her to speak.

“The promotion.” She paused. “I have to leave. I have to move to Chicago by the end of the month.”

The breath whooshed back out of his chest and he sought to find a grip as he sorted through the complications. “OK. For how long?”

“If I succeed? Probably permanently. If I fail? They’ll give me two years to make a go of it.”

He battled his sudden weakness to beg her to stay. Grant reached down deep and vowed he’d never ask her to give up the promotion for him. This was her dream, as the creation of his school was his. He understood the passion of loving what he did, the pull of the work as a constant tease to his consciousness, the pleasure of completing a day with students. He fell into bed at night and felt full in a way that had nothing to do with food. Arianna was a talented woman who was going to make partner. She’d run the Chicago office and make a name for herself, far away from her Iowa origins. He loved her even more for it, understood her like he had no other woman. In that moment, he decided to let her go.

And never tell her about his true feelings.

His tone contradicted his slowly crumbling heart. “Then we have a month together and we won’t lose a moment.”

Arianna stiffened. Her words were hesitant. “Do you want to do the long distance thing?

Grant, I can’t imagine walking away from you. I—“

He stopped her by smothering his mouth over hers. If she said the words he wanted to hear, he’d fall apart. She would stay, and they’d never know what she could have been. Her lips softened, became pliant beneath his until she quieted.

“I don’t want to lose you, either. But you’re moving because this promotion is what you’ve been waiting for. I’m so damn proud of you, Arianna. You go to Chicago and kick some ass. But I think we need a clean break. You don’t need the distractions of a long distance relationship, and I don’t know if I can handle it.”

The starkness of his words took her breath away, but Arianna fought through the fog of pain and swore she’d never ask him to wait for her. If he wanted a clean break, she’d honor his wishes. She wouldn’t tell him she was madly in love with him. She wouldn’t confess having him in her life may be more important than the promotion of her dreams.

Because he didn’t want her.

At least, not enough to ask her to stay. Or to remain in the relationship.

Arianna felt the tears dry up and leave her slightly cold. He felt the chill in her skin and rubbed his hands briskly over her pebbled flesh.

“Come on, it’s getting late. Let me take you to dinner and we’ll talk more.” She allowed him to help her up and get dressed. She allowed him to take her to dinner and drink wine in the candlelight of the expensive French restaurant. She enjoyed the crisp white linens, the rich sauces and delicate fish. They toasted to her success and talked. But not about the promotion or the unspoken questions they both wanted to ask.

And didn’t.