The Widows of Wichita County

December 20

After Midnight `

Howard House

"Shelby? Are you awake?" Crystal tiptoed into Shelby's room. She'd heard the night nurse go downstairs for her midnight dinner. Crystal was still far too keyed up to sleep.

"I'm awake," he answered. "Though I convinced the guard I was asleep, otherwise she'd never relax and leave me alone."

Crystal hesitated. "Would you rather I leave?"

"No. Come join me. We might as well party while we have the chance."

Crystal slipped into his bed, careful not to get too close. Her white satin pajamas didn't make a sound. "I miss sleeping with you, darling. Not the sex so much, just the sleeping."

She paused, thinking of how much a part of their marriage had been the sex. He had taken great pride in "how often" and "how long." Her words now must have hurt him and that had not been her intent.

But he surprised her by answering, "I know. I feel the same. Sometimes I wake up late at night and try to pretend the hum of the machines is the sound of someone breathing next to me."

They lay beside one another for a long while before slip said, "I feel something tonight, Shelby. A changing in the wind. Like after tonight the world will somehow be a different place, and we can never go back to the way it was."

He didn't comment.

"I know you think my feelings are dumb, but don't make fun of them. This one is too strong." Closing her eyes, Crystal almost felt the velvet of a magician's cape floating over her. When it lifted, her world would have shifted.

"How about I never make fun of your feelings again'!" Shelby's voice was so low she would not have heard it if she hadn't been inches from him. "How about I never say anything you do is dumb? How about I call you darling from now on and drop the baby doll?"

She twisted so she could see his face. The sight of him still frightened people, but his looks no longer bothered her "I don't mind the baby doll. I kind of like it. It makes nu feel like I'm still just a kid."

"It's not good enough for you, and I'm finally realizing, it never was." He sounded cold somehow, angry. "And what I'm saying has nothing to do with the offer Trent made you. I've thought about that though, and I've decided you should take the third of Howard Drilling. Get the money and get on with your life. You deserve better than to be stuck with me."

"I'm not going to take the offer." Crystal could not believe he suggested it. "If I have to, I'll fight both Trent and you on the point."

"I'm not who you think I am, Crystal. I'm tired of living a lie. I'm not your husband."

"Shelby, don't get upset. Trent always upsets you when he comes. I don't know why, but he can say three words and you complain for days. And of course you're my husband, being burned doesn't change that."

"Are you listening to me?" Shelby's voice cracked. "Have you heard one word I've said?"

"No," Crystal answered in the formal voice she used to conduct business downstairs. "And I'm not going to until you start to make sense. I'm your wife. I love you more right now for trying to make me leave than I've ever loved you-so why would I even consider Trent's offer?"

She rose up on one elbow and frowned at him. "If you think for one minute that I'm leaving you, you'd better think again. So give up on trying to make me walk out the door. I'm not listening."

She wasn't sure, but she thought she heard him laugh.

"You sound just like Helena Whitworth."

Crystal smiled. "Maybe I do. Maybe the old girl and I have a lot in common. I'm finding out I'm more of a fighter than I ever thought I was. Who knows, in a few years I may be running this town and everyone, even folks I meet on the street will call me Mrs. Howard."

"But Trent promised you-"

"I don't care about the money. I never have, but I couldn't convince anyone of that before the accident, not even you. Now, if I stay, you'll know it's because I want to. The day I got called to the hospital, all I could think of was myself. I guess maybe if Trent had made the offer then, I'd have run. But that was before you needed me. Before the accident I'm not sure you really knew I was alive. Before we began to work together like a team I didn't feel like I was good at anything."

"I'll never be the man you married."

"You're already more than you were before the accident. I see it in how you take the pain without complaint. In how strong you are when I get frightened. You're my hero now more than you ever were before."

He slowly moved his hand and touched her fingers. "You know, I think I'm falling in love with you, Mrs. Howard."

Crystal smiled. "Well, it's about time."

Around old boomtowns weeds now grow over the foundations of derricks that changed lives and land forever. Once in a while someone notices a faded sign of a flying red horse or a wildcat brand carved into wood and remembers how the hunger for oil blew across Texas like a powerful wind.