Through the Zombie Glass

Chapter 13 Let the Dead Heads Roll

In a daze, I made my way to the back of the barn. The slayers had settled in the chairs, all of them cursing and preparing to push their spirits from their bodies. Justin included.

What a shocking turn of events.

Trina gave me a slitted look, and I knew she was commanding me to speak with Cole ASAP.

Soon, I mouthed.

Had Cole welcomed Justin because he hoped to keep his enemy close? Or did he actually trust Justin? Was he using Justin, pretending to trust him in the hopes of gaining information about Anima?

Was Justin sincere, or was he acting as a double agent?

So many possibilities.

One after the other, the slayers stood in spirit form. Except me. I tried, again and again, but each time I failed.

As I struggled, it felt as if someone was holding on to my spirit, forcing it to stay where it was.

Gavin and Veronica took off, followed by Trina and Collins, then Lucas and Mackenzie, Cruz and Bronx. Although it seemed otherwise, no one but me had a partner tonight—and I hadn’t yet been told who that partner was. Everyone was to branch in different directions to cover as much ground as possible. However, no one was to engage until backup arrived.

“What’s wrong?” Justin asked me, hanging back.

Was he my partner? No, surely not.

“Nothing. I’m fine. I can do this.” I closed my eyes. Drawing on every ounce of my considerable determination, I imagined my spirit rising and felt my body respond. But when I opened my eyes, hard hands clamped around me and jerked me back into the chair. What the heck?

Justin shrugged, muttered, “Good luck,” and took off.

Cole crouched in front of me, the only slayer left. Oh, crap. He was my partner, wasn’t he? He looked at the door, then me. The door, me. Indecision played over his features. “Problem?” he asked.

Why not tell the truth? “Yeah, but I don’t know what it is.” Unless...was Z.A. now strong enough to hold me in place?

He looked relieved. “Stay here. I was supposed to be your sidekick, so we were going to cover the same area anyway. I’ll just do it on my own.”

And do it faster, his tone implied.

I scowled at him.

“Tomorrow,” he continued, “Ankh can run a few more tests on you.”

“That’s your answer to everything. Test, test, test. He’s run a thousand already, but hasn’t found anything. There’s nothing else to check.”

“So? He’ll do the same tests again. The results could be different.”

Oh, really? “Do you know the definition of insanity? Doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.”

“Wrong. That’s the definition of determination.” Cole flattened his hands on my knees. Because he was in spirit form and I was in human, he ghosted through me, somehow leaving a trail of heat behind.

“Just go,” I said, shivering. I motioned to the exit.

“Ali.”

“Go,” I repeated.

His gaze narrowed. “Despite everything, I am your boss, you know. You shouldn’t talk to me that way.”

Whatever. “You’re my boss. My ex. My friend. Sometimes. Maybe. You can’t be all of those things at once. You have to pick one.”

His gaze narrowed further, until all I saw was the darkness of his pupils. “Today I’m picking boss. Tomorrow I might change my mind.”

Frustrating boy. “Go!” Then, to be snotty, I added, “Sir.”

He snapped his teeth at me, the same way he’d done when we first met, straightened and strode to the door. He used more force than necessary to push it open, and then he stomped into the night.

I gazed around the barn. Mr. Holland and Kat were locked in a conversation. Anger and frustration mixed, as powerful as a tsunami, and I banged my fist against the arm of my chair. Leaping to my feet, I paced to the end of the row of chairs, turned to pace back...and saw my body in the chair. Wait. I’d done it? But how? Why?

And why were my legs still burning?

Cole’s touch... The burn...

Did Z.A. fear him? If so, I’d let him put those hot spirit hands all over me and hopefully scare her to death.

His hands...all over me... I shivered, then scowled.

I raced for the door. Because it was smeared with a Blood Line, I couldn’t ghost through. Like Cole, I opened the obstruction and entered the night. I looked, but found no sign of the—

Wait. There was a streak of gold in the center of the yard, as if a tiny lightbulb had been dropped. A Blood Line. I closed the distance, saw flecks of red mixed with the gold and frowned. Or maybe not a Blood Line. I found another streak a few feet ahead and followed it, kept following, going deeper and deeper into the forest beyond the barn.

Trees knifed toward the starless sky, and branches clapped in the breeze. An owl hooted. The darkness was so thick it looked like a black blanket had been draped overhead. Cold air battered against me, and goose bumps doubled parked on my arms. Ahead, to my right, a shadow moved—and another smear was left on the ground. I frowned. The smears definitely weren’t from Blood Lines, for sure, but from someone’s shoes. How? Why?

I quickened my pace, whisking forward. The shadow had stopped. I did the same. Tall, clearly muscled—a male. Black shirt, black pants, blending into the night. A dark bandanna covered his hair. Was he a slayer?

Frosty had worn a bandanna. So had Bronx. This guy pressed his chest into the base of a tree and leaned to the side.

“—can’t believe Cole’s doing this to us,” I heard Trina say.

“I know,” Lucas replied, his voice fading. He must be walking away.

So. The two hadn’t left together, but they’d quickly found each other. Interesting.

“Ali better pony up and take care of this, or...”

After that, not even crickets could be heard.

The shadow moved, leaving another smear behind. I claimed the just vacated spot, then bounded forward, finding the shadow several feet ahead. I pressed into another tree.

“Seriously, what are we going to do?” Trina asked, her voice audible once again.

“Be careful. Guard our words and actions. I’m not giving Justin anything to take back to the Hazmats,” Lucas replied, unaware of his tail.

The shadow was in spirit form, definitely, and he was...spying on the pair?

Sparks of anger burned through me. This wasn’t Frosty or Bronx.

He darted around the tree, and I followed. This time he didn’t linger to listen to anymore of Trina and Lucas’s conversation. He branched off in another direction. I continued to follow, watching for the smears. The little traitor couldn’t hide from me. I’d catch him in the act, and—

Something hard slammed into me, knocking me face-first into the ground. Air exploded from my lungs, and dirt coated my tongue. Stars winked through my vision. I tried to crawl forward, but a heavy weight pinned me down. Fear threatened to overtake me, but I quickly rallied, twisting around and swinging out a fist.

Contact!

Pain cut through my knuckles. Maybe I’d broken one. I’d hit the guy in the jaw—a solid, intractable jaw.

“Let me go!” I demanded, expecting to see red eyes. Paper-thin, rotting skin. Hair, hanging in clumps. Instead, I saw familiar violet eyes...and my blood heated in the most delicious way. I stilled.

“Ali?”

“Cole? What are you doing? I...”

Was underneath him. My thoughts derailed. We’d lain like this before. Every other time, he’d been kissing me. Hands had wandered. My body had come alive. I didn’t have my body this time, and yet I felt even more alive, as if I were connected to a generator, my nerve endings buzzing with energy.

His gaze drilled into mine...only to lower to my mouth and linger, everything about his expression softening. His breathing changed, emerging shallow and fast. “Are you okay? I couldn’t see it in your body, but your spirit is gaunt. You’ve lost weight, and there are shadows under your eyes. I wasn’t sure if you were a hiker who’d been lost for several days or a zombie.”

I stiffened, trying not to panic. “I’m okay.”

“Good. That’s good.” His thumbs traced the rise of my cheeks. “Ali...”

I knew that look, that tone, that touch, and knew where this was headed if I didn’t put a stop to it. “Get off me,” I said, ashamed of my sudden breathlessness.

He stayed right where he was. “What are you doing to me? How are you making me forget what’s best for me... For you?”

“What’s best?” Maybe, if he said it, I would finally believe him.

“Me...Ronny. You...Gavin.”

No, I still wasn’t convinced. “Wrong.” I didn’t worry about his words coming true later on, either—not in terms of spiritual law. My free will was not on board. I turned my head away, peering up at the sky. “I’m not attracted to Gavin, and you’re not attracted to Veronica. Not anymore.”

“You’re right. I’m not.” The perfect answer—until he added, “I don’t think.”

The addition stung. Pushed me over the edge of calm.

I gripped his jacket, shook him. “Do you really think you’ll be happy with her?”

“I don’t know.”

“Heck, maybe you will be, at least for a little while, but if you’re true to habit, it won’t last and you won’t stay with her.”

He glared at me. “I don’t have a habit.”

Blind! “You seriously don’t think you’re so afraid of losing the people you care about that you cut them loose before they ever have a chance to get inside your heart?”

He took my hands and pressed them into the ground, over my head, forcing my back to arch and my chest to rub against his. “There are people in my heart,” he gritted out.

What he didn’t say but I heard anyway: just not you.

Have to stop setting myself up for this kind of rejection. “Maybe we’re both wrong. Maybe you don’t even have a heart.”

“Oh, I have one.” Eyes narrowing, he reached down with his free hand and parted my legs, giving himself a deeper cradle—a perfect cradle—and foolish, foolish Ali let him. Hardness against softness, male against female. “I just don’t want it broken.”

“So you go around breaking other people’s?”

“I didn’t break yours, and you know it,” he snapped. “You got over me pretty fast, and I did my best to get over you.”

That was all he said, but I knew. In that moment, I knew. “You’ve already done something with Veronica,” I said flatly.

A dark curtain fell over his features. I waited for him to deny it.

He didn’t deny it.

He nodded.

Even though I’d guessed, shock hit me with the force of a baseball bat. Shock and betrayal. I had no reason to entertain the betrayal. We’d broken up. But...but...here he was, on top of me, and here I was, loving every sensation, and meanwhile, the memory of messing around with Veronica was new and fresh and burning in the back of his mind.

I pushed him off and jerked upright. “I think I hate you.”

“You aren’t the only one. I think I hate myself.”

I was done with this topic. It didn’t matter. It couldn’t matter.

What did you do with her? I almost shouted.

Shaking, I said, “Why did you tackle me if you thought I was a hiker?”

He drew in a deep breath, slowly released it. “A hiker sneaking around, as if looking for someone. I didn’t want to take any chances.” He scrubbed a hand down his face. “Everyone leaves and your ability to spirit walk magically starts working again? You got something to confess to me, Bell?”

I reeled for a moment. “Just what are you accusing me of, Holland?”

“Were you spying on me?”

He... Oh... I gasped and sputtered. “I was not. I was spying on a spy. Was that you I saw skulking after Trina and Lucas?”

A moment passed, the silence laced with incredulity. Cursing, he settled back on his haunches. “Someone was tailing them?”

“I think so, yes.”

“What did he look like?”

“Like you, only not quite as tall. Strong. Wearing a bandanna.” Cole wasn’t wearing one. “His shoes left little golden smears behind.”

Hope filled his eyes, softened his features. “Show me.” He stood and helped me do the same.

Having his fingers intertwined with mine...the warmth, the comfort...I liked it, wanted more and hated myself far more than I hated him. The moment I was upright, I released him. My mouth dried as I backtracked, looking for that last smear I’d seen.

“There,” I said, pointing. “Do you see it?”

“No.”

No matter. He’d never been able to see the Blood Lines, either.

He examined the area. “Is there another one nearby?”

I searched and found another and another, but after a while the smears vanished. Either the guy had left the area or he’d overheard us and had known to take off his shoes.

“Okay. All right,” Cole said. He pinched the bridge of his nose. “The spy has been verified, at least. And now I know he’s male. That cuts my suspect list down.”

“You suspected there was a spy.” A statement, not a question. That was why he’d been spying.

He leaped into action, closing the distance between us. When he reached me, he grabbed me by the shoulders. “You will not tell a soul, Ali. Promise me.”

Had I been a suspect, as well?

Anger returned, white-hot. “Why did you let Justin back in? I know he helped us before, but how do you know beyond any doubt he’s not double-crossing you?”

He shook his head. “I’m not talking about this.”

“Not with me, you mean. Have you discussed it with Veronica?” Stop. Just stop.

His nostrils flared. With anger? With relief? “Do you want to hear what happened with her?” he asked tightly.

Yes! “No.” I don’t know.

“I’ll tell you. I think I actually want to tell you. Then you’ll stay away from me, even when I’m stupid enough to come sniffing around. I’ll finally stop wanting what I know I can’t have.”

I glared at him, saying, “You don’t have to say another word for that to happen.”

“I was at home,” he began. “She came over.”

I shook my head. “Shut up.”

It was an order, but it wasn’t his will. He continued. “I had been drinking. I never drink, but I was trying to forget about you.”

“Shut up!”

“I had been drinking a lot. I kissed her. I thought about never being with you again, and I was angry with you, thinking about you with Gavin, and I kissed her with everything I had. I took off her shirt. I touched her.”

“Shut up!” He was throwing the details at me as if they were weapons.

They were.

“She unbuckled my pants. I—”

“Shut up, shut up, shut up!” I was standing in front of him before I realized I’d moved. Both of my arms heated to a nearly unbearable degree, as if I was about to ash a zombie. But when I raised my hand and swiped at Cole’s cheek, the flames crackling from my skin weren’t white—they were red.

Cole tumbled to the ground as if he’d been hit by a Mack truck. He quickly jumped to his feet, now watching me warily. His cheek was split, but because he was in spirit form, the wound wasn’t bleeding. His body would be, though. Back at the barn, I bet crimson streaked his face.

“What’s going on with you?” he demanded.

Feed from him.

The words whispered through my mind, and I didn’t care who had spoken them. Hunger gnawed at me, relentless. Yes, I would feed from him, would feast on his spirit. Scowling, I stalked forward. The red flames moved to my shoulders. I swung out my arm, but Cole ducked. He could have launched a counterattack, could have kicked my feet out from under me. Instead, he straightened, his hands fisting.

“Don’t do this,” he said.

Not my will. Do it, I would. I circled him, our gazes locked together.

FEED!

“Go ahead, finish your story,” I commanded, doing what he hadn’t done and kicking out my leg. His ankles knocked together, and he tumbled to the ground a second time. The bottom of his pants burned away, revealing another gash in his skin. A gash I had caused. My feet were also covered in red flames. “Help me be sure I hate you.”

“Is that what it will take?” He stood, saying, “She went down on me. And you know what? I liked it.”

With a screech, I lashed out at him.

He dodged.

I would have done it again, but my gaze caught on the fireworks exploding in the sky. One after the other, the other slayers were shooting off their flares. Everyone, it seemed, had spotted a zombie.

Don’t care.

A twig snapped.

My gaze whizzed to the left, and I saw red eyes peeking from the brittle wall of foliage.

Still don’t care.

Cole moved closer to me, perhaps to protect me from the coming battle. When I scented him, my hunger spun out of control. I growled at him.

He looked at me.

I stepped forward... When I’m done, there’ll be nothing left of him... The world around me began to darken, until a black sheet enveloped me.

“No,” I shouted.

Oh, yes.

I think...Z.A. was trying to take over.

I—she—continued forward in spite of the blindness, tripped.

“Ali,” Cole said, concerned.

Time seemed to slow down as I fell, landed. Sound faded from my ears. Except for one.

Tick. Tock.