Tiny Tim

Chapter 6

I woke up disoriented. I had no idea where I was at first, and felt strangely limp. Like I was ripped out of a deep sleep. Slowly, I realized I was in a strange room, wearing some kind of gown. It was a hospital gown. Then I realized that I was in a hospital bed. So, I was probably in a hospital. I closed my eyes to calm myself down, until the memories came back to me. Then I started taking stock on my body.

My right eye was swollen shut, but the overall pain was way better than I remembered. There was an infusion going into my right hand that was probably the cause.

When I looked around the room, I noticed Claire sitting in a chair next to a window, looking into the darkness outside. I was in the parking lot in the morning. If it was dark now, I must have been out for quite some time. I tried to remain quiet, until a female doctor entered the room, causing Claire to look up and notice me being awake. She immediately was up and next to me, grabbing my hand.

“You’re awake! Finally! You scared the hell out of us!” she said, sounding relieved beyond measure. Her eyes looked slightly swollen, remnants of her badly washed off makeup still present, and she was wearing the same clothes I had seen her wear in the parking lot.

I looked around and noticed nobody else waiting. Then I looked at her hands squeezing mine, and finally back into her eyes, with a mixture of irritation and anger. She quickly let go of me and looked hesitant for a moment before the doctor shooed her back into the chair so she could check on me. She first searched the gauze pads on my stomach and chest for discoloration, then spoke while checking my head.

“Good evening, Mr. Brown, it is nice to see you’re up. You took quite the beating. How much do you remember?” She smiled at me. I greatly enjoyed the feeling of that featherlight touch of her fingertips on my forehead.

“Baton to the face, baton to the chest, my brother helping me out by showing off his best Usain Bolt impersonation, knife to the stomach, then ... I’m here, missing my pants.” I answered matter of fact, while counting the events off with my fingers. “So, what’s the damage?”

She was still smiling, though she gave Claire a short look as I mentioned my brother before she answered me.

“The laceration above your eye looks good for now. We glued it up, but It will probably take a few days for the whole swelling to go down. You have a broken rib that got slightly dislocated, but we fixed that in surgery. It will cause you some discomfort for a while, so no heavy lifting.”

I snorted, causing her to smirk and me to realize she had downplayed the part about the discomfort. She continued.

“We wrapped it in a Brace to support it, and it should stop hurting in about a week. It can hurt for three to four weeks when moving, though.”

She waited for me to signal my understanding with a nod before she continued.

“You were lucky with the puncture wound. While the blade missed your major organs and blood vessels, it did sever a few muscles. The surgeon stitched everything back together, but you really need to try and give them a rest. Normally we would immobilize the affected area, but, given it being your midsection, and relatively small, you’ll have to exercise self-restraint. We’re keeping you overnight to make sure there won’t be any lingering effects from the anesthesia, which I’m confident won’t happen, but after that ... You should let your family look after you for a while and help you out. Would that be possible?” she finally asked, looking at Claire.

“Of course!” Claire answered, enthusiastically nodding, while I gave her a firm “No!” at the same time, confusing the doctor for a moment.

“I’ll be just fine, thank you!” I said with conviction.

“Tim! Please!” Claire protested.

“I’m sorry, Mr. Brown. But while this isn’t life threatening at the moment, if I can’t release you into someone’s care ... I’ll have to ask you to stay for a few more days instead.” the doc told me, causing my mood to drop significantly.

“Fine!” I conceded, but was sure I’d be out of there as soon as possible again.

“Your GP can remove the stitches from your chest and the five staples from your stomach in a week. Ten days tops.” she informed me.

“Five staples? The hell did he stab me with? A meat cleaver!?” I asked in shock.

“Sorry, but that was us. We had to widen the incision to check for damages. But it will still leave a nice scar you can show off to your friends.” she lightly chuckled. “Any questions?”

“Well...” I hesitated for a moment, then she encouraged me to speak up. “Pardon my French here, but why does my dick feel like I need to ask you for a penicillin shot?”

This time it was her who snorted. “Okay, at least I know your head is working just fine. We placed a urinary catheter before the surgery. We removed it about half an hour ago. It can cause a burning sensation, but it should vanish within an hour. Anything else?”

“How late is it, how long are visiting hours, and where’s my stuff?” I asked. It seemed to perplex her a little. In truth, I just wanted to know how long I had to put up with Claire if I couldn’t make her go home on her own.

“It’s 6:22 PM, visiting hours end at Eight, and what is left of your clothes is in that bag hanging from the bottom of your bed.”

I thanked her and she left the room. She wasn’t gone for twenty seconds, however, before the door opened again. This time, it was Ava, Aunt Danielle and Uncle John coming in and quickly surrounding my bed. Just what I needed at that moment, even more of them swarming me when I couldn’t run. Ava just about pissed me off when she, just like Claire before, tried to hold my hand. After all this time, after everything they did, they suddenly decided to show they cared? I doubted it, and she got the very same reaction as Claire had. It was Uncle John who talked first.

“Well, let me just take a photo of your face for Bill. He asked us to let him know how you are.” he grinned, holding out his phone and taking the picture as he spoke.

“He did? How does he even know?” I asked, perplexed.

“We were just having brunch with him when Claire called us. I got the impression he somehow took a liking to you. Apparently, you’re ‘like the son he never wanted’.” he chuckled.

“Yeah, sounds like Bill.” I commented and tried to reach the bag with my clothes. I immediately regretted it when the pain in my chest came back. The painkillers did not make this easy for me. They completely masked the resting pain, so I kept forgetting about the injuries when I didn’t move, and then screwed up by moving too enthusiastically.

“Tim ... why did you do that? Why did you put yourself in such danger? How could you be so reckless?” Aunt Danielle asked. I didn’t know what she was talking about.

“That may come as a surprise to you, seeing as getting my ass kicked and then being stabbed is normally one of my favorite pastimes, but it wasn’t exactly my choice!” I said, with a voice dripping in sarcasm. Turning to Claire I added “So, where are the fast and not-so-furious?”

Claire just looked at me questioningly.

“Golden Boy and your husband.” I clarified. While John let out a short involuntary laugh before catching himself upon noticing the scolding look from Aunt Danielle, Claire didn’t like my choice of nicknames for them.

“They were still at the police station giving statements when you came out of surgery. Why are you calling them that?” she asked, clearly disapproving.

“I thought the names fit. Aaron had to be told to get his wife and daughter out of harm’s way. And I’m telling you right now, if you keep defending Logan while I am lying here, you better get the fuck out. Did you follow the conversation before this shit blew up? They were there for him! Not me, him! And then, when I was busy defending myself, the asshole ran away, getting me stabbed!” I replied, anger rising in my voice with each word I said.

“Don’t you think you getting stabbed proves that running away would have been the better choice for you as well?” Aunt Danielle asked in a clinical voice.

I couldn’t believe the bitch! Ever since last Christmas, and despite her assurance that she wasn’t exclusively talking to me, she had only been pestering me, not them, to repair our relationship. And now, when I got hurt trying to help the ungrateful fucks, I get scolded for it!

I looked up at the infusion hooked to my hand, and noticed a little button to press that seemed to be connected to it by a cable. I thought it was maybe one of those dispenser-things that release pain meds if I press the button, so I pressed it repeatedly while I answered her.

“Let me point something out for you here. Again, they came for Logan. I suspect they came from Austin, since that’s where he lives and spends most of his free time now, and they said they ‘chased him down here’. So, try to picture this: They armed themselves, went on a multiple-hours long drive to find him, grabbed him, and then threatened him and his family. Following so far? What in all of this makes you believe they would have just gone home if we turned to run away!?” I asked her, now sounding more than just disgruntled. “Ask Bill if you don’t believe me. He taught me de-escalation techniques and I am convinced they wouldn’t have worked. They weren’t angry, or high, or drunk, they had planned to make Logan pay for something, and he knew it! That’s why he was ready to run the moment he saw them, and why they PREVENTED him from running! So, why are you still asking me why I didn’t run?”

“He has a point, Danny.” John pointed out.

“And before you pull any more accusations out of your ass, I didn’t do shit before the guy reached for his weapon!” I added.

“We really need to address that anger inside you, Tim. Why are you so hostile? I just want to help! You could have died!” Aunt Danielle asked, clearly taken aback by my outburst.

“So, THE FUCK, what!?” I remarked, hearing multiple gasps after shocking them with my statement. “If you expected an answer for why I’m hostile to you, maybe it’s because I don’t need a budget-psychologist, who keeps missing the plot, to start criticizing me the minute I wake up from fucking surgery!” I shouted, now clearly pissed. Then I shifted my attention to Claire and Ava.

“And the last people I need to show up right now are you assholes! What, did you think your presence would somehow comfort me!? There’s a reason I moved out! Do I need to paint you a fucking picture before you understand why I spend as little time as possible in your fucking presence!? None of you give a flying fuck about me the whole damn year around, while Princess over there and your Golden Boy can do no wrong, but now, that I’m in the hospital and the police are involved, you suddenly act like you give a damn?! Have you already forgotten why you were in that damn parking lot in the first place? You think...”

At that moment, an older woman in scrubs entered the room and asked me what I needed. I looked at her in angry confusion.

“You’re pressing the call button, Dear.” she said patiently, pointing at the button I was holding.

“Oh...” I said, rapidly trying to curb my temper. “I thought this was one of those drug dispensers I saw on TV. Sorry.”

“Are you in pain?” she asked, now more interested, moving to the foot of my bed to check my chart.

“It’s manageable.”

“Then why are you trying to activate a drug dispenser?” she scolded me with a stern expression.

“Well, you see, my loving family here is giving me shit for being beaten and stabbed. And I just thought the whole thing would be more fun with a little morphine.” I said, matter of fact, holding my left side. The shouting had taken its toll on my ribs and stomach muscles.

The nurse looked from one face to the other. All four of them looked at least somewhat uncomfortable, but Claire looked like she was on the verge of breaking down. Her hands were shaking, balled into fists at her sides. Her lips were trembling, despite her pressing them together to form a thin line. But the most prevalent thing about her appearance at that moment, were the tears rolling down her face while Aunt Danielle tried to silently comfort her.

Uncle John regarded me with a look that basically screamed apology. The family, or rather his mother, must have already reminded them of forgetting my birthday for the second year in a row. Last year I had let him and Aunt Danielle off the hook, since they are not my parents. And while it’s still not their job to remember my birthday, after they had found out about my birthday being ignored and forgotten last year, they had used that Thanksgiving dinner to put me on the spot and try to make the others remember. I had specifically asked them not to do that because I knew exactly what would come out of it. They insisted, and instead of doing any good, it just caused me more grief. So, I kind of had expected them to do better this year instead of undoubtedly attending yet another family orgy I wasn’t invited to.

Ava just stood to the side, not looking anyone in the eyes. She must have known perfectly well that the pain I went through on an almost daily basis was mostly caused by her actions in school.

The nurse looked at me, noticed me holding my side and made a decision.

“Alright. I’m sorry, but I must ask you all to leave now. I don’t know what is going on, but this patient just got out of surgery, and if he doesn’t calm down and relaxes, it could cause some serious complications.” she announced with authority.

At that, Claire looked scared and quickly readied herself to leave.

“I’m sorry.” she said, before leaving the room.

The other three shortly followed her outside and, as soon as the door was closed behind them, I spoke to the nurse.

“Thank you!” I’m pretty sure she could hear how sincere that was.

“No problem. Need anything else?” she asked, her tone was suspiciously understanding. I wondered if I had gotten so loud, she heard my rant from outside.

“Could you pass me the bag with my belongings real quick? I need to check my wallet for my insurance card.”

“Insurance? I don’t have a note of that missing for anyone on this floor. Shouldn’t that have been taken care of by your parents already?” she asked with surprise.

“Probably. But I have my own insurance. The doc said I could leave tomorrow if there are no complications overnight. If so, I’d like to be able to leave without having to wait for them to sign stuff. That would be possible despite me not being eighteen yet, right?”

“Darling, I’ve been a nurse for thirty-six years now. I’ve seen sixteen-year-old girls come into the ER by themselves after their water broke. They stayed in the labor room for ten hours before finally giving birth, gave the child up for adoption, and then left again by themselves. Their parents didn’t even know they were pregnant until the hospital-bill came in the mail. If there is no medical necessity to keep you, nobody will stop you from leaving.” she explained as she handed me the bag. I produced my Insurance Card out of my wallet, and she promised to update my file. Then she left and I finally went back to sleep.

The next day went much as I had hoped. Off the IV-painkillers, I was surprised about the pain distribution. Honestly, the stab wound in my stomach hurt less than my broken rib. My stomach felt like the mother of all muscle aches, but the chest-pain was explosive and kept stopping my movements. Hearing me explain that to the doctor checking me over, he just nodded. Apparently, this was normal.

“These are Zydol capsules” the doctor said, handing me three pills in a little paper-pouch. “If you feel pain, try an ibuprofen first. Zydol can cause severe drowsiness, dizziness and blurred vision, basically making you useless for the day, so only take them if the ibuprofen isn’t enough to let you sleep. We also prepared the note for school. Try to get an appointment with your GP as soon as possible, so they can take out the staples from your stomach and the stitches from your chest in time.”

I could finally call for an uber and had it drive me to the Walmart parking lot to retrieve my Jeep. My shirt didn’t survive the ER intake, but I had my training clothes in the back of my car. Interestingly, the uber driver didn’t seem phased at all by the shirtless, battered and bruised guy who sat in his backseat.

I arrived at the parking lot and, to my relief, found no parking ticket. The big dark spot next to my front tire, however, made me pause for a moment. I suddenly had absolutely no interest in going back to that house and being confronted with these people again, so I drove to the office instead. It was almost empty, being a Sunday and all, but the ones who were there once again offered me the support I needed. The simple difference between them and my family was that I actually believed them when they seemed concerned for my wellbeing.

I dropped the adapter off in Bill’s office, went downstairs to the basement, and sat at my desk. But I didn’t have anything to do there, so it didn’t take long before my thoughts started drifting back to the fun I had with Tess on this desk. As I was contemplating my life-choices, my phone rang.

“Timothy Brown?” I answered the call.

“Good day, Mr. Brown. This is Sergeant Mills from Harris County. We just tried to meet you in the hospital but were told you already left. We’d still need your statement for yesterday’s events. Would it be possible to meet with us?”

“Oh, of course! I was discharged this morning and went to the office. Do I have to come in or would it be possible for your men to meet me here, so I don’t have to move around so much?”

They quickly agreed to meet up in the office and stepped through my opened door half an hour later.

“Sergeant Mills?” I asked, offering him my right hand before we sat down. He got right to the point.

“Yes. Thank you for making time on short notice. You see, the parking lots at Walmart stores have quite effective surveillance coverage. So, we already got a pretty clear picture of the fight, in addition to the statements from your family members. The reason we wanted to talk to you today is not just to make sure we have the complete picture, I’m afraid. There are some contradictions in the information we received that we’d like to sort out.” he explained after shaking my hand.

“Contradictions?” I asked surprised. I really couldn’t imagine which part of their stories could be contradicting each other.

“Yes. Could you give us your version of the events first?” he asked carefully. I didn’t have a problem with it, so I told him what I remembered without reservation.

“ ... Then, while one of them was holding Logan, another one came towards me and reached for his weapon. That’s when the fight started and we didn’t talk much more. The surveillance tape will tell you more than I could from that point onwards.” I concluded my story.

“Hmm. You see, your brother, Logan, insists that he doesn’t know the three men.” the sergeant told me, with an appraising look to gauge my reaction.

“No way. He clearly recognized them first and tried to run, so he also knew about their intentions.”

He just kept looking at me, like he wanted me to elaborate on that. So, being the law abiding citizen I was, that also smelled an opportunity to fuck over the infallible Golden Boy, I did. Whatever Logan had gotten himself into, I felt no sympathy towards him, and certainly no loyalty. So, I also felt no need to lie to the police for him!

“Look, my brother and I don’t get along that well. In fact, the less we have to interact with each other, the happier we both are. So, I don’t know what’s going on in his life. I don’t have the faintest idea who these three men are, or why they were demanding money from him. But not only were they very sure about who he was, they even recognized our sister, and called her by her name without any of us telling it to them. That would be quite the coincidence if these three were looking for another Logan, who looked just like my brother and also had a sister called Ava. Did you find out who they are?”

“Not yet. They didn’t carry any IDs and refuse to talk so far. We will keep you informed if that should change. Thank you for your time, Mr. Brown. Have a nice day.” he said, before leaving me alone in my office again.

I sat there for another hour, mostly browsing the internet without a goal, learning about the aerodynamic properties of cows, but also trying to not think about Logan’s crap. Finally I got hungry. I locked up, got in my Jeep, and found a pizza place that’s open on a Sunday. I knew the kid behind the counter from school.

“Holy fuck, man! What happened to your face!?” he asked while sporting a big grin. This seemed to be more exciting than concerning in his opinion.

“I got hit. Amongst other things. A big pepperoni pizza with cheese in the crust, please.” I explained, eager to leave again.

When I finally got my food, and had just turned towards the exit, I heard a camera shutter go off. Looking up, I saw the kid from school quickly hide his phone with an embarrassed look on his face. Probably a slow news week in school again if he felt the need to take a picture. I just rolled my eyes - or at least the one that wasn’t swollen shut - and left.

First I drove back to my apartment and picked up a few clothes. If I had to stay at their house again, I’d also need my laptop. I couldn’t survive without a computer. I packed my sports bag and enjoyed my pizza before reluctantly making the hour-long drive to the house.

I was now faced with a dilemma. Should I announce my arrival and be then forced to interact with the family, or should I try to sneak in and risk walking into yet another family orgy? I decided to try the latter option and just bail as soon as I heard the first moan. Entering the house as quietly as I could through the backdoor, I even managed to get upstairs without anyone noticing. When I got closer to ‘my’ room, however, the sounds of a woman crying emanated from the parents’ bedroom.

The door was slightly open, so when I got closer, I could see Claire and Aaron sit on their bed. While Aaron looked like he simply wanted to be somewhere else, Claire’s appearance had declined significantly. Her eyes were already puffy when I saw her in the hospital, but now she looked positively devastated.

“ ... gone!” Claire cried.

“Sooner or later, he has to show up again, honey. I can’t believe he just left the hospital on his own after they told him he needed care!” Aaron remarked with a hint of annoyance.

“He hates us, Aaron! And I can’t blame him! That’s why he left.” Claire said, and started sobbing again.

“He doesn’t hate us, honey. We’re just...” Aaron started, but it seemed like he himself couldn’t come up with any other explanation for whatever they were discussing before I started listening in.

“Yes, he does. Why shouldn’t he? We were totally focused on Logan and Ava, and completely lost sight of him! I can’t believe we were so consumed in the sex, we simply forgot about one of our children! Two years in a row we forget about his birthday. And when we go looking for a gift to make up for it, not one of us knows anything about his interests. Or what’s going on in his life. Or...”

“Honey, we’ll fix this. We just need to start spending time with him.” Aaron tried to comfort her.

“How the hell are we supposed to do that, Aaron!?” Now Claire sounded angry when she asked that. “He got so hurt protecting us from these men, but then didn’t want me anywhere near him! You didn’t see the way he looked at me when he woke up and noticed me holding his hand. Or when Ava tried to. And you didn’t hear him explode when Danny tried to talk to him. How could we reconnect with him if he doesn’t even want to be near us!?”

By the end, Claire’s voice was sorrowful again, and she leaned into Aaron to cry on his shoulder.

Strangely enough, I didn’t feel anything watching this scene. Yes, it seemed like she was honestly regretting what happened, and was apparently devastated about the current state of our relationship. But that wasn’t the first time she regretted something about our relationship. She greatly regretted forgetting about my birthday last year, after her mother scolded her for it, and what came of it? And if our relationship means so much to her that she was now devastated about it, how could she let it continue to deteriorate for a whole year in the first place?

But, most importantly, why was she alone with this? Aaron certainly didn’t sound like he was eagerly looking for ways to make this relationship happen, he just said what came to his mind to calm Claire down. He wasn’t offering solutions or even tangible ideas, he only offered empty promises and platitudes. While I wasn’t surprised that Logan wasn’t there with them, Ava was nowhere to be seen either, and I had shielded her just as much as Claire.

At least she confirmed what I had already believed ever since Ava’s sixteenth birthday. The reason for them neglecting me, and the reason Princess and Golden Boy could get away with whatever crap they caused while I was held in contempt for the smallest mistakes, was that they simply preferred the two kids they could fuck. She would get over it, like always. Logan’s dick would take care of that.

And then I suddenly and finally understood why Logan and Ava were always so eager to make my life hell, and worked so hard to drive me away. I felt stupid for not thinking of it earlier. They didn’t want to lose their special standing! That’s what all the ridicule and humiliation was about. Keeping their parents from becoming interested in me! And they made me a laughingstock and ran interference whenever they could so I’d eventually just leave and they would never have to share.

Well, it worked. There was no way I would move back in and play happy family, just to screw with their little paradise of entitlement. I could make a move on Claire, Aunt Danielle, and Maggie simply to spite them. But then again ... why would I want them? Would that make everything fine again? I didn’t think so. What I had with Tess had shown me that I would never be happy with anything this ‘family’ could offer me. I didn’t just want sex, I wanted and needed companionship. And my only companion was gone.

I quietly moved to my room, closed the door, and set up my laptop. Around Eight PM I was getting tired. I had confined myself to my bedroom again to avoid the others, and luckily nobody came to check on me either. But now I desperately needed a shower. The doctor had told me to wait with it until the staples were out, but the smell I was giving off was ... manly. And it made me think that going yet another day without a proper wash, and certainly another week, presented a higher health risk than a little soap in the incisions.

I had showered with open wounds on my body many times before, when the bullying in school was still more than just insults and jokes on my behalf. So, I already knew the soap wouldn’t sting as long as I didn’t remove the gauze pads until I was done rinsing myself off.

After the shower, I replaced the soaked gauze pads by taping a few big bandaids over the wounds, painstakingly rewrapped my chest, and was thoroughly beaten. All the movement had greatly aggravated my ribs, so I opted for the opiates the doctor had given me, dropped on my bed, and was out like a light.

I dreamt of Tess. We were at another street fair, trying out all the food stalls. Then we were back in her living room, simply enjoying each other’s company cuddled up on the sofa. Then I felt something shift, and we were in my bedroom together. She had just sat on the edge of my bed, wearing only a pair of panties under a thin morning coat, looking into my face and examining my swollen right eye with a worried expression.

“Hey.” I smiled at her, and the hand that was lightly brushing along my forehead stopped.

“I’m Sorry. I didn’t want to wake you. I ... I just wanted to check on you.” she said quietly, sounding worried. It took me a moment to remember what happened that day, and consequently how I must have looked.

“Don’t worry. Looks way worse than it is.” I said, in a sleepy whisper. “I’ll be perfectly fine in a few days.”

It seemed to give her pause, but after a few seconds she smiled at me. I loved it when she smiled. Though, I could tell she wasn’t actually happy. Her happy smiles always caused those cute little wrinkles to spread across her nasal bone because she always scrunched up her nose.

“You sure, baby? Doesn’t it hurt?” Tess asked, as her hand resumed moving and gently brushed my cheek.

I couldn’t help but close my eyes and let out a soft sound of approval, as I turned my head towards her fingers to encourage her caresses. It was so long since I had last heard that pet name she always used for me. It was so long since I could feel her touch. I didn’t want it to end.

“Hm.” I let out, before my hand reached up to hold hers. “I missed you, Tess.”

For some reason, her hand jerked a tiny bit when I said that, but I quickly held on to it, unwilling to let go so soon. I gently pulled her down to me and she laid herself next to me, or more like half onto me because my twin size bed was so small, with her head on my chest.

“Is that Okay for you, baby? I don’t want to hurt you.” she sounded worried again.

“Just my left side that’s hurt. Right side’s all yours. And school lied! Drugs are awesome!” I replied, somewhat broken. It was like my mind was getting increasingly foggy, my eyes refused to open fully, and I just couldn’t shake it.

I was affectionately scratching her back, and I could have sworn I heard her quietly humm when I placed a light kiss on the top of her head. She replied by placing featherlike kisses on my right chest, while lightly stroking my upper stomach. As her hand roamed downwards, she started tracing my muscles with her fingertips.

“You really changed. You’re even well on your way to get a nicely defined six pack.” she remarked quietly.

“What d’you mean? You had me naked so much, you sho’d know.” I replied, with a light chuckle.

She seemed to contemplate something for a moment, then she spoke again.

“Why did you get hurt, baby?” she asked, sounding a little uncertain. Like she wasn’t sure what she wanted to ask. “Why did you do that to protect u ... your family? You even stepped right in front of those three men to shield your mother and sister.”

“Dun’no, really. Had no problem watchin’ Logan get his ass kicked. He’d deserved it. I jus’ ... didn’t like how they talked to ‘em. And what they’d do to ‘em when Logan wouldn’t pay up.” I replied honestly.

“But don’t you ... hate them?” she asked quietly and almost scared.

“I don’t like ‘em. Doesn’t mean I’d just stand by and watch ‘em being taken as payment. No matter what I think about ‘em ... Can’t do it.”

After a few seconds of silence, she started kissing my collarbone. I got the impression she was pleased with my answer. Then she slid down the bed as her kisses wandered down my body, passing the Rib Brace, over my upper stomach, and she finally placed six soft kisses on my abs. One on each part of my barely visible six pack. Then she let her head rest on them, her face pointing to my now half hard cock. Feeling her soft cheek on my stomach, with her face so close to my groin, had an obvious effect on me, and she just stared at the rapidly growing result.

“Baby, you’re getting hard.” she whispered.

I reached down with my left, hooked my thumb into the waistband of my shorts, and, ignoring her barely audible gasp of surprise, pulled them down a little to reveal the two triangle shaped muscle groupings underneath my abs. Then I placed my right hand on her shoulder.

“Missed two.” I just said, with a naughty grin.

She remained still for a moment, before she slowly slid her legs off the mattress to kneel on the ground and moved her head further down my waistline. I could feel her hot breath tickle my stomach, her breathing growing louder.

When she placed the first kiss on the right triangle, I let out a little moan and my dick hardened considerably. An involuntary spasm traveled through my arms, causing me to push my shorts down a little more and expose the base of my dick to her eyes. When she leaned over me to kiss the left triangle, her breasts pressed into my side and my right hand slid from her shoulder, over her side, onto her butt. The same spasm rippled through my arms again as her lips made contact with my skin, and not only did I, again, expose the base of my cock to her, I also gave her plum buttcheek an involuntary squeeze. She reached up and placed a hand on my now rock hard dick, lightly stroking it through my shorts.

“Please, honey! It’s been so long!” I almost whined.

“Well, I can’t let my brave baby keep hurting, can I?” she said, before getting up, walking to the end of the bed, and pulling my shorts off. Then she spread my legs, laid herself onto her stomach between them, and grabbed my dick with both hands. Realizing she was undoubtedly going to pleasure me with her mouth, I hoped she appreciated that I kept the grooming up and was still cleanly shaven. I so hoped I would get to feel her throat massage me again.

Lying on her stomach, her legs angled up, I could see her feet sway behind her. I could also catch glimpses of her round, panty clad butt swaying from side to side, as her head moved in serpentines around my shaft. She alternated between slowly licking the sensitive skin, and affectionately covering my entire length in loud wet kisses. She placed a kiss on the tip, then carefully licked the little band on the underside of it, and then moved the tip of her tongue down the underside of my shaft. She lightly and sensually rubbed the tip over her face, against her cheek as she kissed the base, and across her nose as she licked the shaft. Then she sucked one of my balls into her mouth, laying my entire length across her face while glancing up at me. The entire time I could hear her soft breathy moans announcing her own lust.

She lifted her head, looked deep into my eyes as she rested both her hands flat on my pubic bone, and opened her mouth. When she closed her lips around my cock, she had engulfed little more than the tip, and started lightly sucking on it while bobbing her head merely an inch down and back up. I felt her tongue massage all around my now painfully pulsating crown.

I was a little confused. This was completely different to what I was used to from her. Normally, her blowjobs were sloppy, loud deepthroats. Like she wanted to show off her depravity. But this was slow, loving, teasing and sensual. Like she wanted me to know how much she cared about me and making me feel pleasure without putting on a show.

“I love you.” I admitted. I couldn’t help it. I had felt it for so long, and just had to finally say it out loud.

She abruptly stopped any form of stimulation, as her body froze. Her eyes wide upon hearing my reckless declaration, she paused for another second, and then switched tactics. One of her hands resting on my pubic bone slid downwards and started fondling my balls. Her other hand wrapped itself around the base of my cock and started massaging it in a twisting motion. She looked at me again before bobbing her head a little faster and in two-inch increments. Then, vexingly slowly, she lowered her head, placed both of her hands to either side of my hips, and took my cock all the way past her uvula.

Even though I finally got the deepthroat I had expected, this, too, was remarkably different from how she normally did it. Normally, she just slammed her head into my crotch, impaling her throat on my cock without mercy. Now, however, I could feel every little part of my cock being stimulated as it slowly passed the little ball dangling at the entrance to her throat, before feeling my tip rub against the back of her throat. As her head moved down, she raised her butt and her morning coat slit over it, so I could get another good look at its heart shape. She bobbed her head a few times before completely lifting it off and releasing my dick from her mouth so she could talk.

“I love you too, Baby! I love the taste of your hard cock!” she moaned. “Come for me, Baby. Give it all to me. You deserve this! You deserved this for so long!”

She scooted back a little so her head was tilted upwards, just like that first time in my office. My dick was pointing in a straight line through her mouth and right into her throat. I knew what was coming next. But again, she did it painfully slowly, so I could feel my tip scrape along her soft palate before her uvula scraped over the upper side of my crown, and my tip was finally engulfed by her upper sphincter.

She took me to the hilt and moved her shoulders from side to side to rub my cock against the walls of her throat. Then she pulled back until only the tip remained in her mouth, and started eagerly pushing me towards an orgasm. She grabbed my base again, moving her hand in a circular motion around it, while wildly bobbing her head up and down, sucking like her life depended on it.

“God, honey, yes! I’m ... I’m coming!” I panted my warning, and, for the first time this evening, she finally showed some consistency with her usual behavior, as she simply ignored my words and kept going.

She didn’t slow down one bit when I started squirting my load into her mouth. She didn’t gag, didn’t pause, she just swallowed everything I gave her and moaned loudly until my dick started shrinking. Only then did she allow it to pop out of her mouth. My orgasm was so strong, I was panting like I had just ran a marathon, and had serious problems focusing my eyes. She scooted back up, laid down next to me again, and caressed my cheek while whispering sweet nothings into my ear.

“I love you, Baby! You have no idea how much I actually love you. I won’t leave you again. I will never let you be alone again.” The words alone had me smiling already, but as she said them, she placed soft kisses on my ear and neck until I finally calmed down enough to remember where I was.

I wrapped my arms back around her and pulled her body as close as possible into mine. After the blowjob had woken me up quite a bit, the fogginess made its way back into my mind with how relaxed I now was. Sleepiness crept into my body once again and I knew I wouldn’t be able to fight it for long.

“I’m sorry I can’t return the favor right now.” I whispered into her hair. “I promise, as soon as that thing comes off my chest, I’ll show you how much I love you! I missed you so much.”

“You ... uh ... could just visit me?” she carefully asked, with clear uncertainty in her voice.

“Don’t test me. I thought about it. But you know I can’t.”

“Why?”

“You made me promise I’d keep going.” I replied, causing her to look at me in great confusion.

Saying those words caused the memories to flow back into my mind. The realization hit. This was just another dream of her, like so many I had of her over the last few weeks. And every time, I would wake up the next morning just to realize that she was still dead. It was just my mind playing out fantasies of the woman I loved more than my life, and yet couldn’t hold on to. I had to close my eyes to try and stop the tears from coming. I failed miserably.

“Baby!? What...!?” She sounded panicked when she noticed the tears rolling down my face, after a quiet sob had rocked my body and drawn her full attention to me.

“I miss you so much, Tess. Why didn’t you just tell me? You didn’t have to keep the cancer a secret from me. I could’ve been by your side when ... when you...” I finally asked, but still couldn’t say that last part out loud, and the now uncontrollable sobbing stopped me from trying further.

“Wha ... Oh my God! Baby, no! Oh God, no! I’m so sorry!” I heard Tess’ shocked and shaking voice.

She held me for a long time, cradling my head to her breasts while all the pain I had kept hidden for months finally broke loose. I embarrassingly wept loudly like a little child while hugging her body tight to mine, afraid she would suddenly vanish again, and continuously apologized for being unable to help her when she was sick. Until, finally, the opiates did their thing, and I slipped back into an uneasy sleep.