When Day Breaks

CHAPTER 12

SWANNY let himself in the door as quietly as possible, though it was stupid of him to tiptoe around. But after making a total horse’s ass of himself with Eden, and then Skylar having to smooth things over, he was feeling like a first-class moron.

Skylar hadn’t said much, just that she’d explained “things” to Eden, whatever “things” was supposed to mean. Sky had worn a mischievous expression, though, and her eyes had sparkled with amusement when she’d told him to get his ass back over to his room and quit acting like an idiot.

Then her expression had gotten more serious as she’d told him not to fuck up his chance with Eden. What chance? And how had things progressed to this point so damn quickly? He’d only met the woman a little over twenty-four hours ago and it boggled his mind that he supposedly had a chance to mess up. Or get right.

He wasn’t sure whether he was relieved or disappointed when he found the living room empty and the door to Eden’s bedroom closed. He realized that he was a total chickenshit, which didn’t sit well with him. When it came to his profession he had confidence in spades. But on a personal level? Relationships? Confidence wasn’t a word that was exactly in his vocabulary. And definitely not with a woman like Eden.

What the hell did she see in him? It was a question that had haunted him for hours. Why was she even bothering with him, and why had she looked so hurt when he’d pushed her away?

He couldn’t get that quick flash of hurt he’d seen in her eyes out of his mind. That he had that kind of power to hurt a woman of her caliber baffled him. Women like her likely left a trail of broken hearts in their wake. And yet she’d said rather bluntly that it was he who would likely break her heart.

He knew that shit like love at first sight wasn’t some hokey crap only in fiction. He’d witnessed it firsthand. Well, maybe it wasn’t at first sight, but pretty damn close. His teammates had certainly fallen hard for their wives, and it sure as hell hadn’t taken very long to accomplish. But it wasn’t something he ever envisioned happening to him.

How could he love someone he didn’t know? How could she love or rather like or be attracted to someone she didn’t know? They were, for all practical purposes, strangers thrown together by circumstance. Nothing more.

And yet she’d have him believe she felt something more for him. Would he be a fool to look the other way? To ignore what she was blatantly offering him? What was the worst that could happen? They’d have a fling and then go their separate ways? He could think of a lot worse things.

No one said they had to declare undying love or devotion to become involved physically.

Except that for him . . . sex wasn’t casual. Or at least he didn’t consider it a mindless act. Something to gain quick release and then go on his merry way. Perhaps that was why his sex life wasn’t exactly lighting the world on fire. Well, that and the fact that one side of his face was a mangled mess.

The few women he had been with hadn’t seemed to mind, but then he’d made damn sure he made up for his appearance by focusing on their pleasure. Keeping the lights off hadn’t hurt either.

But who in their right mind would turn the lights off when making love to a woman as fucking gorgeous as Eden Sinclair? Hell, he’d want to memorize every part of her body. Every dip, every curve. He’d commit to memory the way her eyes glazed with passion, the way they flared when she orgasmed. Though he might be putting too much stock in his sexual prowess. Who was to say he’d even be able to satisfy her? A woman like her could certainly afford to be picky. And yet . . . she wanted him.

His groin reacted to the fantasy he was creating in his mind, and his dick swelled in his jeans, making it damn uncomfortable. He was going to wear the imprint of his zipper if he kept this up.

So what the hell was he supposed to do? March into Eden’s bedroom, toss her on the bed and fuck her six ways to Sunday?

He shook his head in disgust. First he owed her an apology for acting like a dick. She deserved more than some crude fuck. She deserved to be seduced. And then made love to the entire night, everything devoted entirely to her pleasure. He wanted to make her forget any other man she’d ever had sex with. For her he’d pull out every single trick in his repertoire and learn a few more to boot. The idea of learning what pleased her appealed to him not only on a physical level but on an emotional one too.

“Swanny?”

It took him a minute to realize that Eden was standing in the doorway to her bedroom and that apparently she’d called his name more than once. He glanced up to see her wearing a worried frown as she stared at him, question in her eyes.

“Sorry,” he muttered. “Was just thinking.”

“Must not have been good thoughts,” she murmured.

He almost laughed. If she only knew . . .

“I was asking if you were hungry. I was going to order room service. It’s late and I need to call it an early night. Shooting starts early tomorrow morning and I need to look my best.”

As if she could look anything else. This was not a woman who had to work at looking good. If manufacturers could bottle her kind of beauty they’d be fucking gazillionaires. It was little wonder why she was so highly sought after. Having her back a product? Complete gold mine. She looked utterly approachable, not at all standoffish like he might expect someone of her celebrity to be. People likely flocked to her, drawn by her sweetness and genuine kindness.

“If you’ll tell me what you want, I’ll order for both of us,” he offered.

She offered him a smile that took his breath. Bottled sunshine. That was her in a nutshell. He seemed to reference the sun a lot in her presence. But being in close proximity to her was like taking a bath in sunshine on a perfect spring day.

Jesus. Now he was some kind of damn poet? It was obvious she turned him into a blithering idiot, waxing poetic when she was around him. If he weren’t careful, he’d start spouting the crap he was thinking and then she’d realize what he already knew. That he’d lost his damn mind.

“Just a fruit tray for me. I need to keep it light. Can’t afford any extra pounds.”

He snorted as he took in her flawless figure. “You look fucking perfect the way you are.”

Her cheeks bloomed with color and she smiled again and that squeezing sensation in his chest grew, threatening to close off his throat. Jesus, but this woman was death on men. The entire male species, no doubt. She likely had them all throwing themselves at her feet, humbling themselves for just a crumb from her. A smile. Or just a few words. He should know because he was precariously close to being one of those men.

“But order whatever you want,” she added quickly. “It’s not going to bother me for you to eat something more hearty. You’re a big guy. I’m sure you need the calories. Besides, I’ll live vicariously through you and at least get to smell whatever you eat.”

He frowned. “Do you ever get to eat like a normal person?”

She looked puzzled. “Of course. I mean it’s normal for me. I just have to watch what I eat. The camera is unforgiving and adds pounds, so I have to compensate for that. I do splurge from time to time, but this shoot is too important to risk even one extra pound. When it’s over I’ll celebrate with a nice big steak.”

“I’ll take you out for one,” he blurted out before realizing he was in essence asking her out on a date.

Her smile grew bigger, a dimple forming in her cheek and fascinating him. He wanted to run his tongue over it. And a whole lot of other places on her body.

“I’d like that.”

“I’ll, uh, just grab the room service menu,” he mumbled.

“Why do I make you so nervous, Swanny?” she asked softly.

Their gazes connected and he forced himself not to look away, not to avert the scarred side of his face as he was so accustomed to doing.

Betraying heat crept up his neck and into his face. She’d been nothing but honest with him, so he could be no less with her. “You scare me to death,” he admitted.

Her eyes widened. “I do?”

She sounded shocked, and he supposed it did sound absurd. He protected people for a living. Carried out missions that required courage and strength. He was tested on a daily basis and yet he’d just admitted that he was scared shitless by a woman half his weight. A woman whose bones he could break if he wasn’t careful. His hands were big like the rest of his body. Not meant for a woman as delicate as Eden. They were a true study in Beauty and the Beast. And he wasn’t a believer in fairy tales. He saw too much reality in his line of work. Knew there were too many unhappy endings to believe in too much goodness.

And yet he worked for an organization that prevailed in goodness and justice. For KGI—and him—failure simply wasn’t an option. But here he was throwing in the towel before the very start. What a fucking pussy that made him.

“If I promise to behave, will you at least have dinner with me?” she asked, her eyes sparkling again.

He grinned crookedly. “Yeah, I’d like that.”

She arched an eyebrow. “You’d like me to behave myself or you’d like to have dinner with me?”

He laughed this time. “Has anyone ever told you how incorrigible you are?”

“And how neatly you avoid the question. You’re very good at that, you know.”

“I’d like to have dinner with you. Whether you behave or not,” he added.

“I wouldn’t turn down a teeny bite of your steak, that is, if you’re having one,” she said, a look of longing in her eyes.

“A filet sounds really good,” he admitted.

She pulled a face. “Now you’re just being mean. That’s my favorite steak.”

“Then I’ll make sure I order one and save you two bites. I can’t think one extra will hurt.”

She donned a thoughtful expression. “On second thought, order me a salad, no dressing. Then I can have those two bites.”

“You got it.”

He went to where the room service menu was laid on one of the tables and then called down their orders while Eden disappeared back into her room.

He felt her absence immediately. It was as though she took the sunshine with her, as corny as that sounded. But she just brightened any room she was in. He could honestly just stand in the same room with her and watch her. Could spend hours doing it. She was . . . genuine.

He felt guilty for the assumptions and accusations he’d levied at her. He’d acted like a first-rate dick and she hadn’t deserved that from him. For whatever reason she seemed to genuinely like him—was attracted to him. And he was a dickless twit who didn’t comprehend the magnitude of what this beautiful woman was offering him. Herself.

She’d asked for nothing in return. No hidden agenda. What could he offer her anyway? He couldn’t think of a single ulterior motive she could possibly have for pursuing him, nor could he imagine why she wanted him. But as the saying went, he wouldn’t look a gift horse in the mouth. Nor would he spend time questioning it.

If she wanted him, then he was damn well going to give her what she wanted. Just as soon as he figured out when and how.