Chasing Paradise

Chapter 3

A shaft of sunlight invaded the room from the windows, waking Ethan. Giving his mind a minute to process, Ethan took stock of his situation. He was curled around a soft, warm body. As the memories of the night before assailed him, he wrapped a possessive arm around Gwen’s waist and buried his nose in her hair, inhaling her intoxicating scent with each breath. Every impulse urged him to cuddle her closer, to wake her with kisses and strokes.

Ethan couldn’t believe how responsive the woman had been. Who would’ve guessed it from the uptight businesswoman she presented to the world? Her body had taken him in, embracing him as none other, and her scent had overwhelmed his senses. The mindless pursuit to give her an experience she’d never forget had driven him forward.

He liked to think he succeeded. Three times. It was certainly a night he wouldn’t soon forget.

After they had gotten enough energy to get up from the floor, they’d moved to the shower, where he had taken Gwen against the wall as water pounded against his back. They were both ready to go again by the time they finally made it to bed. It was hard to believe how many times he had taken her, or how perfectly she had responded. As if she was made for him.

Every sound she made, every move, pushed him higher until, in the end, he experienced a pleasure greater than ever before. Almost as if he’d found where he belonged.

Shaking his head, Ethan slowly disentangled himself and eased out of bed. Those feelings were dangerous. Gwen had been a perfect bed partner, but sex was all this would ever be. He wasn’t looking for anything more.

If he were… He stopped himself before completing the thought. Best not to go there. The whole point of this vacation was to have fun and to get away from clingy females, not to start a relationship.

His chest tightened as he slowly pulled on his clothes and crept from the room.

Without giving himself a moment to second-guess his decision, Ethan gently closed the door behind him, hearing the lock click into place. No turning back now. Although he was tempted to pound on the door and beg for forgiveness. Instead, Ethan turned from the door and walked away from the woman consuming his thoughts. He was moving on.

The snick of a door closing pulled Gwen out of sound sleep. Pushing her long hair out of her face, she blearily looked around the room.

“Ethan?” She hated the tentative tone of her voice. Ethan had more than convinced her how sexy he found her last night. Clutching the sheet higher, Gwen sat up and looked around. His clothes were gone from the floor and the bathroom door stood open, the dark alcove mocking her with its emptiness.

Glancing at the clock, Gwen was startled to see it was almost ten in the morning. She never slept this late. Then again, she didn’t usually stay up as late as she had with Ethan, either.

The late hour encouraged her. He’d probably gone downstairs to get something to eat. Wolves weren’t the most patient shifters, especially when it came to food.

Chuckling to herself, Gwen quickly flung the covers aside and jumped out of bed. If she hurried, she might be able to catch him in the hotel restaurant and share a meal. Another giggle escaped as she pulled on some clothes. She was so damn happy.

How lucky was she? Just as she despaired, wondering if she’d ever find her mate, he strolled right on through the doors of her resort and straight into her arms. He hadn’t been able to resist her any more than she had been able to resist him.

Her otter cooed in contentment within her chest as her future with Ethan played out in her mind. There would be children and love and affection. Everything she’d ever dreamed of.

Eager to join her new mate, Gwen hurried through her morning routine and rushed out the door, turning down a shortcut that would take her through the staff kitchens and hotel bar.

Ethan sat at the resort bar with his head in his hands.

“What would you like, sir?” He looked into the cheerful face of the male otter and had to resist the urge to growl. What was wrong with him? He hadn’t felt like himself since leaving Gwen this morning. The urge to lash out at those around him, to fight with any male in the room, kept rising up. Every second he stayed away was a fight with his wolf.

“Ugh, something strong.” Ethan groaned, hoping a drink would take the edge off his nerves.

The bartender’s eyebrows rose and he glanced at his watch before moving to pour the drink. Ethan’s wolf tried the whole time to pull him back to Gwen’s room, but he refused to give in. His wolf would thank him one day. Until then, he needed something to dull his senses.

Although he was only a couple years younger than his brother Jason, unlike him, he wasn’t ready to mate. Yes, his wolf would understand someday. But in the meantime, it felt as if his body was being torn in two.

A long growl grew in Ethan’s chest, causing the bartender to stare at him warily as he set a glass of straight whiskey in front of him.

“I saw you with Gwen last night, didn’t I?” the man ventured. Ethan looked at him, wondering where this conversation was going.

“Yeah?”

“She never sleeps with guests, you know? You must mean something special to her.”

There was a calculating gleam in the man’s gaze that set Ethan on edge. The bartender better be careful. With his wolf this close to the surface, Ethan didn’t have as much control as normal.

“It was just a one night stand. It didn’t mean anything for either of us.”

“You sure? If I know Gwen, she wouldn’t have behaved that way for anyone but her mate.”

“Don’t be ridiculous. She’s not my mate.” His wolf cried inside him as the words left his mouth, fighting hard for control. But for good measure, he went one step further to hammer the point home. “Besides, she isn’t the kind of woman I’d choose for my mate. A jaguar or a coyote is a good mate for a wolf.” Ethan didn’t believe a word he was saying. The woman he’d just left would be a perfect mate for him.

“Mating is a long way off for me,” he muttered.

Gwen leaned against the wall in the kitchen behind the bar listening as Ethan discussed the reasons she was ineligible for his mate. A small mewl of distress escaped her before she could contain it.

A jaguar or a coyote is a good mate for a wolf… Her heart almost burst. No matter how hard she tried to put a positive spin on his words, nothing came to her. Ethan didn’t want her.

Tears tracked down her cheeks but, even though they were silent, she still caught the sympathetic gazes as the staff milled around her. All her hopes and dreams for the future crashed around her in jagged shards, cutting into her on the way down. No matter what Ethan claimed, she knew the truth. Ethan’s wolf was mate to her otter. She’d never been more certain of anything in her life. But despite what his wolf wanted, the man didn’t want the woman. Their animals were made for each other, but that didn’t guarantee a happily-ever-after.

Ignoring the staff, Gwen continued to listen as Ethan denied everything between them. She forced herself to stay, needing to hear this. All of it.

After it appeared he had wound down, Gwen silently crept away, avoiding the gazes and concerned hands reaching for her. When she made it back to her room, she collapsed on the bed, allowing the sobs of grief to escape her at last. No one would hear her in her room as the weight of despair crushed her.

In her darkest hours, she had imagined not finding her mate, or finding him after she was too old to have children. Never did she imagine not being good enough for her mate once she found him.

With fierce resolve, Gwen rose to a sitting position, wiping the tears off her cheeks. Screw that! He wasn’t good enough for her. She was successful and smart and had a good sense of humor. She managed one of the most successful shifter resorts in the world. Who the hell was he to claim she wasn’t good enough?

A knock at the door interrupted her silent rant. She thought about ignoring it, but as if reading her thoughts, the knocking became more insistent.

“Gwen, I can hear you crying. You’d better open this door right now or I’m breaking it down.” Alyssa’s voice drifted through the solid panel of wood. It figured her best friend would find her eventually. Gossip among the staff always spread quickly. Why would her failure be any different?

Throwing open the door, Gwen took one look at her friend and burst into renewed sobs. Strong arms encircled her small frame and eased the door shut, enclosing them in Gwen’s room. Alyssa was her rock, the one person she knew without a doubt would always be there for her. They’d been inseparable since childhood, despite Gwen being older by three years.

“Oh, sweetheart. What happened?”

Gwen sniveled out the whole sordid affair between sobs, letting her anger and frustration bleed through. Shocked silence met her story until Gwen revealed what she heard in the bar.

“Bastard!” Gwen smiled at the affronted anger expressed on her behalf. “You deserve so much better. Want me to beat him up for you? Say the word, I’ll do it. I may not look like much but I have a mean right hook.”

“You’re a good friend, you know that?” Alyssa always knew how to cheer her up.

“Of course I do.” Both women sat, lost in their own thoughts for a moment. “So what are you going to do now?” The quiet question hung in the air, taunting Gwen.

What was she going to do? The thought of watching Ethan flirt with other guests and staff for the next two weeks was more painful than she could bear. She feared she wouldn’t be able to stand it. Would beg him to come back to her, destroyingher pride along with everything else. Or worse, that he’d use her and she’d be unable to resist. She couldn’t let that happen.

Seeming to sense her distress, Alyssa bumped shoulders with her. “Don’t worry. I give him one day before he’s banging on your door again, crawling back.”

“No.” The statement was quiet but resolved. “He doesn’t want me, Lyssa. It’s not just him denying I’m his mate. He doesn’t want a ‘woman like me’ as his mate. I’m better than that. Damn it, I deserve more than that.” Gwen was quiet for a moment, contemplating her next course of action.

“I have some vacation days saved up. Maybe I’ll go visit Ty’s ranch in Nevada I haven’t seen him in a while.” Ty had worked at the resort for a summer a few years ago and the three had become fast friends. Gwen and Ty had even dated for a while, but it had never been serious. Both had known the other wasn’t a mate, simply good company. After he left to make his own way in the world, she’d kept in contact and they remained good friends. “Besides, it might be good to get away for a few days…or until Ethan checks out.”

A vacation sounded like exactly what she needed. The risk of running into Ethan was too high here. It would kill her to live through the heartbreak of his words over and over. Her worst fear was that the mate attraction was a pull neither of them could resist. She deserved to be wanted for who she was, not forced into a future that would be miserable for both of them. Being alone was preferable to that fate.

Distance was what she needed. The more distance between them, the safer they both were. It was the only option.

Ethan couldn’t sit still. Lying on the beach hadn’t helped. Swimming hadn’t helped. Hell, he’d even shifted and run through the woods. Nothing eased the restlessness consuming him. There was only one cure, one thing guaranteed to still the animal inside. One woman. But when he’d searched for her, she wasn’t where he expected her to be. Nor could he find her anywhere else he looked.

So he went back to the first place he’d looked, pacing the hallway outside Gwen’s office. His nose told him she wasn’t inside, but she had to come to work sooner or later. When she did, he’d be waiting.

The need to see her, smell her, hold her, overwhelmed him. The feeling of being caged continued to grow as more time passed. Where the hell was she?

“Sir, is there something I can help you with?” The voice was friendly enough, but the young otter’s eyes were cold. She looked him over with a sneer, as if finding him lacking.

“Waiting for Gwen,” he managed to growl out.

“I’m sorry, sir. She’s not here. I’d be happy to get our acting manager if there’s a problem you need addressed.”

His heart skipped a beat in his chest.

“What do you mean, she’s not here? I was just with her this morning.” If possible, the eyes looking him over grew colder, and the smile fell from her face.

“Just what I said, she’s not here.” Even the friendliness in her voice had disappeared.

Panic burned in his belly. If she wasn’t here, where was she? What if she’d gone for good? No, he wouldn’t accept that. She was his. Made for him, just as he was made for her. This wasn’t how things were supposed to work.

The woman turned to leave, but Ethan caught up with her and spun her around.

“Where is she?” Ethan demanded. He knew he was being rude, but he couldn’t care about that now. All that mattered was finding his mate.

“She went on a little vacation of her own.” She started to turn away, but Ethan stopped her again.

“When does she return?” A deep rumble built inside him. She hadn’t mentioned a vacation. Had last night meant nothing to her? How could she just leave after everything they’d shared? And without a damn word.

“I believe she mentioned coming back once you checked out. Now, if that’s all, sir, I have other duties to attend to.”

Half-mad with impatience, Ethan’s wolf had reached the end of it’s rope. Grabbing the woman by the shoulders, Ethan spun her around and demanded to know where his mate had gone. He was through denying what he wanted. He needed Gwen more than he needed his next breath. How dare she run away from him.

If it was the last thing he did, he’d find her, and then find out why she ran. She was his mate and her place was by his side. Forever.

Anger and resolve overtook her best friend’s mate. Watching it happen before her eyes was fascinating.

The last thing she wanted to do was betray Gwen, the woman was like a sister to her. But some sixth sense compelled her to help this wolf, screamed at her that this was the right choice. He’d have to do a lot of crawling and begging to win her back after everything he’d said, but Gwen deserved her mate, deserved happiness and family. Sighing in frustration, Alyssa wrote Ty’s address down on a slip of paper and handed it to Ethan.

“You hurt her again, I’ll castrate you,” she threatened calmly as he reached for the paper. If there had only been surprise in his gaze, she would have snatched the paper away before he could read it. But pain and determination were also in the look he shot her as he nodded. Determination to make this right. Taking the paper, the wolf ran down the hallway like the hounds of hell were following.

Looks like Gwen is in for quite a surprise, she thought with a smile. Hopefully the wolf would live up to the faith she’d just placed in him.