Desire

Chapter Twenty

Her startled gasp loud in the silence, Brynn whirled to find her husband standing in the doorway.

“Lucian,” she rasped.

“You didn’t answer my question, love.” He stood waiting, his features as cold and hard as she had ever seen them.

Brynn stared at Lucian in horror, unable to speak.

When she remained mute, he crossed the room toward her. “Was it poison or something else, Brynn?” His tone was deadly calm.

“ W-what do you mean?”

“Don’t dare lie to me.” His voice held a savage edge. “I’ve had enough of your lies. What did you put in my wine?”

She swallowed hard. “It wasn’t poison.”

“What then?”

“Only a sleeping draught.”

“Only a draught? You attempted to drug me.”

“Y-yes.” Yet Lucian obviously had only pretended to drink, Brynn realized.

A muscle in his jaw clenched. “I had hoped I was wrong.” He stopped before her, his face so dark with anger that she took a step back. “Fool that I am, I prayed you weren’t guilty of treason.”

He moved toward her, his shadow slipping over her as he grasped her arm in a painful grip. Reaching down, Lucian took the pistol from her belt. “Forgive me if I don’t trust you with a weapon.”

Numbly she shook her head, trying to recruit her wits. “Lucian, it isn’t what you think-”

“No?” He gave a sharp laugh. “Then tell me.”

Pulling her arm free, Brynn moved over to a chair and sank down heavily. “I drugged you to keep you safe. I was trying to save your life.”

“Indeed?” His features were set like granite. “You’ll understand if I don’t believe you. You were aiding your brother in treason-keeping me out of the way so he could dispose of the gold.”

“No. I don’t deny I wanted you out of the way, but it was solely to save your life. Grayson said those men… they would kill you if you interfered tonight. I didn’t want you to die. I… I love you, Lucian.”

His very stillness sent a shiver through her. “I told you not to lie, Brynn.”

“I am not lying. I swear it. I fell in love with you, even though I tried desperately not to.”

“How convenient that you just now realize your feelings when you’re seeking to mollify me.”

She closed her eyes wearily. “I didn’t just realize my feelings. The change has been coming over me for weeks. You must believe me, Lucian.”

“Must I? You won’t convince me, Brynn. You’ve lied once too often.”

She shook her head. “If I lied, it was because I had no choice.”

“You had no choice.” The comment held contempt.

“Won’t you even listen to my reasons?”

“Very well. Try to explain your lies. Tell me about my seal ring. You gave it to your brother so he could arrange to steal the gold shipment.”

“That isn’t true! Gray took the ring from your study, yes, but they threatened to kill him if he didn’t comply with their demands.”

“They?”

“A smuggling ring. Gray says they’re vicious. He became involved unwittingly at first, because he needed money to repay our father’s enormous debts and to stave off our creditors. My brother isn’t evil. He just desperately wanted to save our family from penury or worse. He agreed to smuggle a cargo for them, not knowing it was gold. And then they began blackmailing him. He had to give them your seal or they would kill him.”

“Why didn’t you simply tell me?”

“I couldn’t take the risk that you would arrest him. Or that one of you might be hurt if you tried. After what happened between you and Giles…” She saw Lucian wince and continued more quietly. “I admit I wanted to protect my brother, but surely you can understand my feelings. You felt the same way about your friend Giles, you told me so. You grieved for his death. Well, I didn’t want Gray to die, any more than I wanted you to. Or Theo. They have threatened his life as well. And mine, for that matter.”

From the rigidity of Lucian’s jaw, she could tell he had no intention of trying to understand her dilemma.

Her voice dropped to an anguished murmur. “I didn’t know what else to do, Lucian. It has been terrible, feeling torn between people I love.”

He didn’t respond at all to her assertion. “That wasn’t your only lie. A few weeks ago you disappeared, but you weren’t with Raven or Meredith as you claimed. How do you explain that?”

“I visited a Gypsy fortune-teller at a fair. I hoped to discover if there was a way to break the curse. I couldn’t divulge my purpose to you, Lucian, don’t you see? I couldn’t admit loving you, even to myself.” Her voice caught on a sob. “I was too afraid I would cause your death.”

“But you’re not afraid now?”

“Yes, I’m afraid! But it’s too late. I can’t help my feelings for you.”

He remained silent, his eyes dark and distrustful. “And did your Gypsy know of a remedy?” he asked finally.

“She said… I would have to be willing to give my life for you.”

His mouth curled. “I can’t imagine that happening.”

Brynn looked away, misery choking her. Lucian didn’t believe her, didn’t trust a word she said. Nor could she blame him. She had never done anything to deserve his trust. She had only fought with him and lied to him and tried to drug him…

Bleak despair washed over her. She felt tears streaming down her face, tears that Lucian evidently noticed.

“Weeping won’t sway me, Brynn.”

“I know,” she whispered, fiercely wiping them away.

He hesitated a moment before saying in a deadened voice, “What of the babe? Why did you lie about that?”

Her gaze flew to his.

“You didn’t think I would find out, did you?” Lucian’s eyes were icy and lethal. “Why would you conceal such a revelation from me, Brynn? Because you intended to leave me? You meant to deprive me of my child without even letting me know of his existence?”

She remained mute, unable to refute his accusation.

He ground his teeth, as if striving for control, but for an instant she saw the despair in his blazing, searching eyes. “I waited for you to tell me, Brynn. I hoped… You know how much I wanted a son.” There was a rawness in the quiet words that tore at her heart.

Brynn hung her head. Perhaps she had been wrong to withhold the news of her pregnancy from Lucian; she had robbed him of the joy of finding out from her, of sharing in her great discovery. And yet… “I didn’t dare tell you.”

“Why not, damn you?”

She lifted a pleading gaze to him. “Because I was afraid for your life! Once you discovered that I’d conceived, I knew you would never let me go. But I couldn’t stay with you any longer without falling in love with you. Without bringing the curse down on your head.”

Lucian stared at his beautiful wife, trying to read the truth in her emerald eyes. Had she really wanted to protect him from that damned curse, or was she merely trying to save her own skin?

His mouth twisted sardonically. “Well, I doubt you would have kept the secret much longer now that your complicity has been revealed.”

She bit her quivering lip. “What do you mean?”

“Surely you’re aware of the advantage in divulging your condition? Breeding is the rare circumstance that can keep a female traitor from the hangman’s noose. Indeed, perhaps that’s why you seemed eager to conceive my child-as surety against having to pay so severely for your crime.”

Her chin came up, while her eyes flashed. “That is a despicable insinuation. I wouldn’t want to conceive a child just to escape punishment, even if I were guilty. I am not a traitor, Lucian, whether you believe me or not. And I don’t want you to die. Even if I didn’t love you, I would still want you safe. That’s all I’ve ever wanted. To keep you safe.”

Lucian remained grimly silent. He desperately wanted to believe her profession of love, but he couldn’t allow himself. He had played the fool with Brynn once too often.

As if understanding his struggle, she rose and went to him, stopping a mere foot away. He could feel her warmth, her devastating allure, even dressed as she was in male clothing.

Determinedly Lucian clenched his hands at his sides as he fought for control. He wanted to shake Brynn, to dredge the truth from her. He wanted to strip away the deception between them, the dark secrets, the lies. He wanted to pull her into his arms…

Damn her to hell. She stood looking up at him in the dim lamplight, her eyes shimmering pools of green. She seemed utterly sincere. Was she guilty of treason, or was she only trying to protect her brother?

“I cannot prove my innocence, Lucian,” she said softly. “But I swear on our child’s life, I am telling you the truth.”

A surge of anger shot through him at her callous oath. Brynn was manipulating his sympathies, using his greatest vulnerability against him. It would serve her right if he arrested her and turned her over to the British government-

Silently Lucian cursed himself. He couldn’t send Brynn to prison, even if she was a traitor. God knew, he didn’t want anything or anyone to hurt her. She was his wife. The woman he loved. Even now his desire for her burned hotter than ever. It was a hungering ache that never left him.

Guilty or not, he couldn’t act against her. Even if it meant having to sacrifice his own honor, he couldn’t allow her to suffer the punishment for treason.

Lucian squeezed his eyes shut, blocking out the sight of her exquisite face. He would risk anything to protect the beautiful deceiver who owned his heart.

Still… he had to consider his duty. He had to prevent her further betrayal. And he had to keep her safe. He could think of one possible way…

Hardening his heart, Lucian made himself meet her gaze. “You’ve caused enough damage, Brynn, but I don’t mean to give you any further opportunity. As soon as I deal with your brother, I plan to take you to Wales.”

“Wales?”

“To the Wycliff castle there, where you’ll remain until my child is born. It will serve to separate you from your brother. Meanwhile, you may consider yourself under house arrest.”

“Arrest?” Her eyes widened with alarm.

“Yes. This house is surrounded, Brynn. If you attempt to leave, you’ll be arrested. Your brother, as well. You won’t succeed in your conspiracy.”

“Lucian, please-”

“I’ve heard enough.”

He started to turn away, but Brynn grasped his arm, detaining him. “What do you intend to do?”

“Prevent your brother from delivering the gold to our country’s enemies.”

A look of fear crossed her face. “You can’t involve yourself, Lucian.”

“Can’t I?”

“You’ll be killed. Please, I beg you…”

Lucian gritted his teeth. She wasn’t as concerned for his life as for her brother’s, he well knew. He could understand why Brynn wanted to protect Sir Grayson-because she was fiercely loyal to her family-but it galled him just the same that she would choose a traitor over him. But no amount of pleading would keep him from apprehending her brother.

Brynn evidently sensed his determination, for she took a deep, shaky breath. “Very well, then. I will take you to Grayson.”

Lucian gave her a sharp glance. Her tears were under control now, and her expression was emotionless, without a show of any feeling whatsoever. “What are you saying?”

“You don’t know where to look for him. I can show you.”

“I don’t need your help. I told you, if he attempts to leave, he’ll be arrested. He won’t get far.”

“He won’t be seen leaving the house, Lucian. You may search all you want, but you won’t find him.”

Lucian hesitated, wondering if this was yet another of Brynn’s silken lies.

“I will lead you to him. And the gold. I believe I know where he’s hidden it.”

His eyes narrowed. “Tell me.”

“No.” Brynn shook her head. “I won’t let you go alone, Lucian.”

He took a menacing step toward her, but she held her ground. “I am going with you.”

“Do you think me a complete gull? You expect me to follow you blindly into a trap you’ve plotted with your brother?”

A look of pain crossed her face. “I haven’t plotted any trap.”

“You aren’t going anywhere, Brynn. You are still my wife, and carrying my child. Traitor or not, I don’t want you endangered.”

“I don’t want you endangered, either. In any case, my brother would never harm me.”

“But his cohorts would. He’s right about the smuggling ring being vicious. They won’t think twice about wrapping that fiery hair of yours around your throat and strangling you with it.”

“I know. Why do you think I wanted a pistol?”

When that gave him pause, she pressed her argument. “What do you think I was planning, Lucian? I intended to stop Grayson myself, so you wouldn’t have to. I know you don’t believe me, but it’s true.”

Irate that she would continue her brash falsehoods, Lucian raised both hands to cup them around her throat in a velvet grip.

She gazed back at him mutely, anguish in her eyes.

With another savage oath, Lucian let his hands fall away. “Wait here,” he demanded.

“Lucian…”

Rejecting her plea out of hand, he left Brynn in the study, shutting and locking the door behind him. Striding swiftly along the corridor to the front entrance, he let himself out and descended into the darkness.

Philip Barton appeared out of the night. “My lord?”

“What have you seen of Sir Grayson? Has he made an appearance this evening?”

“No, he hasn’t left the house.”

At least not by any of the conventional portals, Lucian concluded. He could order the house searched, but he suspected Brynn was being truthful for once; Sir Grayson wouldn’t be found. There had to be a hidden passage within the house, Lucian realized. He might find it eventually, but his efforts could prove too late.

Philip seemed able to read his mind. “I have men patrolling the beach, as you ordered.”

“They still could slip past with the gold,” Lucian said grimly.

“What do you wish me to do?”

What indeed? Lucian wondered. If Brynn was telling the truth, she could lead him to her brother and the gold.

And what then? Would she then spring her trap?

Did he really have a choice, though? He couldn’t risk letting the gold fall into French hands. He would have to accept Brynn’s terms, despite the danger.

“Have your men maintain their posts,” Lucian said, turning on his heel. The price of trusting his wife might be his own life, but he had no better option.