Lycan Christmas

Chapter Six

Lorent walked just behind Melony, mesmerized by the sway of her hips.

She was a tiny slip of a thing, but she packed some serious curves. If the dictionary had the cliché “dynamite comes in small packages,” he was sure a picture of Melony would be the only definition required. She amused and intrigued him. When she’d lit into him about her cat earlier, he’d found her protective nature endearing. He’d almost let his lips slip into a smile, until she’d glared at him. While she didn’t frighten him, he thought it best not to provoke her further.

And what had been the deal with the laundry? He could have sworn he’d smelled Shannon’s scent coming from the clothes, but why were they at Melony’s, and why would she be doing Shannon’s laundry? He figured the incident with the cat had sparked but a momentary lapse into anger born of her love for Puss. Her current mood, he was sure, was due to whatever Shannon was up to.

He found he wanted to ask her what had happened, wanted to comfort her, listen to her and assure her, but he didn’t quite know how to do so. As they walked on a path through the trees toward the Learning Center, she remained silent. Strangely enough, he found he wanted to hear her voice, even knowing that once she started talking, she’d probably ask him questions he didn’t want to answer. But most of all, he wanted to brighten her mood and make her smile.

He did the only thing he could think of to distract her from whatever was bothering her and started telling her about the trees and plants in the area.

“White spruce.”

Melony stopped when Lorent spoke and turned toward him. “Excuse me?”

“This is a white spruce. It’s an evergreen and can grow up to sixty feet tall.” Lorent laid his hand on the wide trunk of the huge tree he stood next to.

“Oh.” She blinked as if clearing her head. She gazed up to where the top of the tree stretched toward the sky. “It is beautiful. I was admiring one last night while the moonlight glimmered through its branches.”

Yeah, he remembered and wondered what she’d think if he told her he’d been admiring her while she’d been admiring that tree. Would she think him a perv? Probably. Women didn’t tend to like men who stalked them, although had he found her sneaking a look at him, well, that wouldn’t feel creepy at all. It would turn him on to know that she’d been covertly ogling him. Hell, it would turn him on if she openly ogled him.

“If you liked that, wait until you see the moonlight on a quaking aspen.

The underside of its leaves shimmer silver in the wind. When there’s a light breeze and a full moon, it’s an amazing sight. Of course, you’ll have to wait until spring to see its leaves again.”

Melony pursed her lips and nibbled the bottom one with her teeth, watching him in silent contemplation. “What are some of the other trees here?”

Now that was a question he didn’t mind answering. “I won’t name them all, but some of the more abundant ones are red maple, tamarack, bur oak, and arborvitae. The arborvitae attract deer.” She continued to watch him as they slowly walked along the path. “If you had gotten here in September, I could have shown you the yellow flowers of the witch hazel and white flowers of the edible elderberry. The cranberry bush also has white flowers, and bears bright red fruit that the birds love to feed on. Those three are shrubs, though, not trees.”

She followed him as he searched through the plants. When he found what he was looking for, he turned around and motioned for her to come closer. He pointed to a wilted-looking bush. “This is wolfberry. They flower white in the summer, but in September and November, ripened seeds fall from it and attract wildlife. There isn’t much left of it because it’s late in the year.”

Melony looked around cautiously. “What kind of wildlife?”

Lorent shrugged. “Just the norm—deer, fox, raccoon, opossum, rabbits, and the occasional black bear, elk, coyotes, and my favorite, wolves, to name a few.”

She swallowed hard. “W-Wolves?”

“No need to be afraid. They won’t bother us.” Good thing he hadn’t told her about the bobcats, mountain lions, and snakes. When he looked at her concerned face, he decided he wouldn’t tell her either, at least not for a while.

“You are extremely knowledgeable of the environment, Lorent. I haven’t met many men that have bothered taking the time to learn about trees and plants. It’s refreshing.” Her eyes twinkled.

“When I first came to Sanctuary, learning about the local fauna and flora proved a welcome distraction from, um, things, and it quickly turned into a hobby that I enjoy.”

What he didn’t tell her was that learning about the trees and plants had been a way for him to escape when things started closing in on him. Once he was deep in the woods, the beauty of nature calmed him. It had been the next logical and natural step for him to delve deeper into the thing that gave him comfort. He was no expert by any means, but knew the basics about most of the indigenous species in the area.

She took a step closer to him, and the urge to reach out to her proved too much. He ran one finger down her cheek and nearly groaned. She did feel as soft as she looked, and her chocolate eyes sparkled at him.

“I hope to learn more from you. The forest is quite fascinating.” Her lids drooped, and she leaned into his touch.

Startled by her positive reaction, common sense finally bit him in the ass.

He jerked his hand away and continued up the path.

“Sorry.”

“Wait.” She hurried after him.

He kept walking until her small hand closed over his forearm, and he halted.

“What are you sorry for?”

“I had no right to touch you, Melony. I was out of line.” He stared at the ground, not wanting to meet her eyes, not wanting to see agreement in them.

“Lorent?” When he still didn’t look at her, she gave his arm a gentle shake. “Lorent?”

Finally, he gave in and caught her gaze, amazed at what he saw in the liquid brown depths. No scorn, no agreement, only kindness glimmered in them.

“It’s okay. Friends do occasionally touch one another, right?” She raised one perfectly sculpted brow.

“Friends?” He’d never had a friend. Well, that wasn’t entirely true. Knox, Rose, and the others at Sanctuary were his friends, but he saw them more as mentors or big brothers and sisters rather than friends. She was offering something he’d never had, something he never realized he wanted until now.

“Yeah, friends.” She gave him a warm smile and giggled.

Her laughter was magical, full of life and soothing, but it also enticed him, an emotion effortlessly provoked from the grasp of his ironclad control.

He doubted she was aware of the ease with which she tempted him. The wolf inside him begged and pleaded to claim her, but he couldn’t give in.

Because if he did, he could be thrown out of Sanctuary. If that happened, he might as well be dead because he was certain he’d never be able to walk away and forget about Melony.

While he’d only met her a few short hours ago, she was part of him now, ingrained in his soul forever. He’d rather stay and suffer never being able to touch her, possess her because at least then he’d be able to see her, hear her laughter, talk to her. If he were kicked out of Sanctuary? He squeezed his eyes shut for a moment while anger and fear blended together into a perfect concoction of anxiety, anxiety triggered by the mere thought of never being near her again. That only strengthened his resolve and control.

Until he was finished with his training—which would most likely end after he played teacher with Melony—he had to keep his hands off her. That includes your lips, tongue, and cock too. Maybe if he could prove he was fully reformed and would abide by ancient laws, do whatever it took to protect his kind, he’d be allowed to claim Melony. And he was reformed. He’d never allow harm to come to any potential mate again. He was a man now, not a boy, and he would no longer be intimidated by rogues.

What if she doesn’t want a loser like you? Why did he keep torturing himself over his past? Was he really reformed if he couldn’t forgive himself? He didn’t want to contemplate the answer to that one because he wasn’t sure there would come a time that he would be capable of forgiving himself.

What was in the past was in the past, but in his case, what was in the past bit him in the ass every time he thought he was getting over it.

He needed to get over it, but he didn’t know how, and he couldn’t bring himself to talk to anyone about it, not even Karen. He was too ashamed, too angry, and too disgusted with himself to expose another to the unforgivable things he’d allowed to happen in his presence. Besides, if he couldn’t forgive himself, how could he expect anyone else to?

“Come on. Let’s get to the Learning Center. I have lots of questions, and we only have today and tomorrow to meet this week since Thanksgiving is on Thursday.”

“Oh yeah. I almost forgot about that.” How had he forgotten about that?

Melony. That was how. She seemed able to make him forget lots of things.

Stranger yet, the thought of the gathering didn’t seem as daunting as it usually did. Maybe that had something to do with Melony as well.

“I’m going to help out with the food. I’m not a very good cook, so I hope I don’t mess anything up. It’ll be fun, though. I’ve always wanted to learn to bake and all. Mom didn’t really show me much in the kitchen because she wasn’t a great cook either. Maybe I’ll pick up some pointers.”

He didn’t miss the flicker of pain in her eyes, and the need to comfort her pounded through him again.

“What happened to your mother?”

“She died in an accident.” Tears glistened in her eyes, and she looked away from him.

The way she broke eye contact and the way her words trailed off told him her mother’s accident was still a fresh wound and hard for her to talk about. What kind of accident had her mother been in? He didn’t want to push the subject at the moment because Melony looked as if she might burst into tears, and crying he couldn’t handle.

“I’m sorry.” He hoped she didn’t think him insensitive for changing the subject, but he didn’t want her to be upset. “I could show you how to cook if you’d like.”

She stopped, and he wondered if he’d said something wrong when she turned and stared at him. He held his breath, and finally let it out when her lips slowly tilted upward in a smile.

“My, my. You are full of surprises, aren’t you? You can cook?”

He nodded. It was one of those things he hadn’t learned to do until he came to Sanctuary. Hell, until then, he’d scrounged for most of what he ate.

He’d never had a real home or place he could cook. Learning how to take care of himself had been something he’d enjoyed, right along with discovering the names of the trees and plants. Both gave him a sense of pride and comfort.

“That would be nice. I mean, don’t get me wrong. I can do most of the basics. You know, mac and cheese, spaghetti—sauce from a jar, of course—

easy things like that.”

“I can show you how to make sauce from scratch.” Damn it. He’d just scolded himself about keeping away from her as much as he could, and now he’d possibly committed himself to spending even more time with her.

She’d voiced something she wanted, and he immediately tried to give it to her, no questions asked. It was instinct for him to want to make her happy.

No, not only instinct. He needed to make her happy.

As the Learning Center came into view, he breathed a sigh of relief. At least here, others might be around off and on. It was difficult to be alone with her—walking through the woods, even sitting in her cabin watching her scribble a list—without touching her.

He opened the door for her, and after she entered, she spun in a slow circle while whistling long and low.

“This place is amazing.” She tilted her head up and studied the fifteen-foot beamed ceilings.

“All the buildings and cabins here are built by hand from the trees on the land. I helped with this building. Not much, because it was nearly done by the time I arrived, but I got to help with some finish work.”

He agreed with her. It was amazing. It had no grand facade, but the vaulted ceilings, stained glass windows, and rustic lights and decor gave it an air of elegance and functionality—two things he’d never imagined would coexist with such ease.

She ran her fingers along a row of books—a row amongst many that lined the whole south wall—and smiled. “I love to read.”

“I love to read as well.” Another thing he hadn’t learned until he’d come to Sanctuary. It hadn’t been a necessity for his lifestyle before then, but it had been part of the reformation program.

At first, he’d scoffed at learning to read, but once he’d put his nose to the grindstone, he’d picked it up fast. He loved spending late nights lost in a story, imagining he was in the world created by the author right along with the main character. Sometimes he was the hero, and sometimes he was the villain. Reading had proven to be another welcome way to escape when things closed in on him.

“What will you teach me first, Lorent?” Melony wandered around for a few more moments before taking a seat at a long desk with a laptop at one end. “Wow. Can you actually get the Internet way out here?”

“Sometimes. The service isn’t exactly reliable, but we make do.” It took him a few seconds to remember that she was waiting for him to fill her in on the agenda, so lost was he in the simple act of looking at her. He cleared his throat. “I thought maybe we could just talk about some general things the first day. I could answer a few questions. We could do that tomorrow, too, and when Monday comes we can start with the self-defense since there won’t be another break until Christmas.”

“Sounds good. One thing that has been niggling at the back of my brain for a while . . .”

He nodded, and she continued on.

“It seems that all the potential mates I’ve heard about so far have been women. And all the rogues have been men. Don’t you ever find male potential mates or female rogues?”

“No. All male lycan are born lycan, and all potential mates are female. It’s not something we can explain, but it’s the way it’s been since anyone can remember. We’ve never heard of a female turning rogue once her mate changes her. In fact, we don’t think it’s possible. On the other hand, it’s not known if a rogue has ever found his intended mate either. If that were to happen, we haven’t a clue if the rogue would get more aggressive or if the natural instinct to protect and love his mate would aid in reformation.”

“Oh my. I never thought of that. That would truly be a sticky situation to be in.”

“Yes. It would be.”

What would he have done had he come across Melony before he’d come to Sanctuary? He wasn’t sure, but he did know one thing. He would have never hurt her, not physically. He may have taken her, believing it his right to do so, but might have never come to fully understand why the need had been so much stronger with her, would have never known it was because she carried the mated scent that only he could detect. Now that he was reformed, he understood that had he found her before Sanctuary and forced her to stay with him, she would have probably never forgiven him, probably grown to hate him.

Not to mention the fact that at that time he could not have protected her. How would he have kept her from the other rogues? He would have most likely unintentionally and naively led her right into harm’s way. The others would have taken her from him, abused her, and he would have had no way to stop them. In fact, the instinctive need to protect her would have probably ended up getting him and her both killed. His stomach curled at the thought, and he silently thanked fate for not bringing her to him when he was still a stupid child unable to take care of himself, much less a mate.

She frowned, and he wanted to smooth the lines from her face with his finger and then his mouth.

“I can’t imagine what it would be like to find the man I was destined to be with, only for him to subject me to violence. It would be heartbreaking.

What if a woman meets her mate and they don’t get along?” Her eyes glistened. “My God. You don’t force women to be with their mate if they don’t want to, do you?”

She stood. Her skin paled, and she began to visibly tremble. He went to her and laid his hands on top of her shoulders.

“Melony?” He waited until she looked up at him. The bewilderment in her eyes nearly brought him to his knees. “No woman will ever be forced to do anything against her will while under the care of Sanctuary. We’ve never had an instance where potential mates rejected one another. Well, let me rephrase that. We’ve never had an instance where potential mates rejected one another, but didn’t work things out willingly in the end, without force.

“I won’t lie. It is difficult at best for a male to control his need to claim his mate once he encounters her.” Didn’t he know it. “I’m not sure what would happen if a female flat-out rejected her mate. It’s never happened here, and if it did, the woman’s rights would be respected. I don’t know what the ultimate outcome would be for the male, because while the man may understand that his mate has rejected him, the wolf will insist upon taking what belongs to it.”

“Oh. I hope that never happens. That would be sad.”

He nearly groaned, and barely resisted the urge to crush her to his chest and assure her that he would never let any harm come to her. He wanted to hold her and promise to take care of her always, but he couldn’t. And now he’d just opened a whole new can of worms for himself.

What would happen if he forced his wolf, himself, to stay away from Melony? Would his wolf win out in the end?