The Crazy Things Girls Do for Love

Chapter Twenty-One It isn’t easy being Green

“But did you see her? Did you see what she’s wearing today?” Maya yanks open the door to the cafeteria as though it has personally offended her. “Green! She’s all in green! Even her eyes are green! Gott im Himmel, she looks like the Jolly Green Giant’s girlfriend!”

Alice, who has seen Sicilee several times this morning, says, “I just don’t see what you’re getting so worked up about.” She picks up a tray and follows Maya to the lunch queue. “I mean, really. So she’s in green. Even if she suddenly sprouted leaves, Sicilee Kewe is still the human equivalent of a ten-million-litre oil spill, for God’s sake. How could she be any competition for you? I mean, Cody’s not stupid, is he?”

“Oh course he’s not stupid.” Maya reaches for a cheese sandwich, but remembers just in time that she’s a vegan now. “He’s incredibly intelligent.” She scans the day’s offerings. Ham sandwich. Tuna sandwich. Chicken nuggets. Spaghetti with meatballs. Pea soup. Clearly, the cafeteria staff aren’t aware of the crucial relationship between veganism and saving the earth. “But you should have heard her at the meeting, Al. She made it sound like she invented conservation while she was washing her hair. She—”

“Yeah, I know.” Not a day has gone by since the meeting that Alice hasn’t heard about this. In detail. By now she feels as though she was there herself. “But she didn’t invent conservation. She probably can’t even spell it.”

“It doesn’t matter if she can spell it or not. She’s determined to get a date with Cody. Gott im Himmel, Alice! She came to school with him yesterday!”

This is another episode in the life of Maya Baraberra that Alice has heard so much about she feels she must have witnessed it. “You don’t know that. All you saw was them walking in together.”

“They were laughing.”

“And?”

“And he’s never laughed with me, has he?”

Alice resists the temptation to bang her head against the chrome shelves. “But I thought you said that you humiliated her in front of him. He’s going to know she’s not much of an environmentalist after that.”

“I said that I tried to humiliate her in front of him.” Maya slaps a plate onto her tray. “But she just bounced right back. I’m wearing them, not eating them… Well, I’m sure they look better on you…” She isn’t even sure that Cody was making fun of Sicilee when he told her that he had the same shoes as Maya. He could have been laughing with her, not against her. “The problem is that Sicilee has the ego of a Master of the Universe. And she’s devious. She’ll do anything to get what she wants. I bet that even her parents are afraid to turn their backs on her.” Maya pays for the soup, two apples and the roll she finally selected. “So let’s just stroll by her table to make sure she really is eating vegetables.”

“Oh, for God’s sake…” Alice groans. “Again? Are we going to do this every day for the rest of our lives?”

“Only if we have to,” answers Maya as she steps into the lunchroom. And stops so suddenly that Alice nearly walks into her.

There, right in front of them, and no more than a step or two away, sits Cody Lightfoot. It’s a dream come true. He’s alone. By himself. Or as good as. He’s not with Sicilee Kewe, which is the important thing. He’s with Whatshername – the skinny one who looks like a librarian in an old movie – and her schlumpy friend. He isn’t eating, but talking. Instead of his lunch, there are several pieces of paper in front of him.

Maya glides up to their table as if she’s on wheels. “Hi, guys! How’s it going?”

Waneeda and Joy Marie, who know very well that Maya isn’t talking to them, don’t even bother to nod.

Cody, in the middle of a sentence, breaks off to look at Maya. “Hi,” he says. “How’re you?”

“I’m fine.” Maya’s head bobs for emphasis. “I’m terrific.”

Cody smiles as if he is really glad to hear this. “That’s great.” And looks down at the papers with a certain amount of longing.

“You know, I haven’t had a chance to say how terrific the meeting was. Remember, I sat next to you? And I was the first person to talk about why I was joining the Environmental Club?” Just in case he has forgotten. She wasn’t sure, yesterday, that he actually knew who she was. “I thought it was really so inspiring. You were.” She sets her tray down on the table with a bang. “Oh, God. Sorry.” Soup slops over the rim of her bowl and onto her tray.

Cody moves his folder out of the way. “Yeah,” he says. “It was a good meeting. Fruitful.”

“But I bet the next one’ll be way better,” enthuses Maya. She leans on the table, sending more soup over the edge and one of the apples rolling through the puddle. “Because if everybody’s like me, I already have so many ideas, I—”

“What is that stuff?” Cody’s looking at her soup as if it is toxic waste about to spread throughout the lunchroom and drown them all.

“Soup. Pea soup.” Maya beams. “You know, because I’m vegan?”

Oh, of course, he’s supposed to say. You’re the girl who shops in second-hand stores and rides her bike everywhere and is vegan – just like me. But that isn’t what he says.

“What makes you think it’s vegan?” asks Cody.

Maya is still smiling, but not so happily now. She has the unpleasant feeling that she’s watching victory (or at least a chance to score on Sicilee Kewe) being snatched from her grasp. “Because it’s made of peas.” Her laugh isn’t particularly happy either.

“Yeah, but what else is in it?” asks Cody. “Usually they make it with a ham bone or even chicken stock.”

This, of course, is news to Maya. Despite her belief that she’s been a vegetarian for the past six months, it has never occurred to her to read the label on anything, except to check the calories per serving. Fortunately, she is no stranger to adjusting the truth on the spur of the moment. “Oh, this soup’s not made like that,” says Maya. And then, inspired by despair, adds, “I checked. I mean, we vegans can’t be too careful, can we?”

“Dead right. That’s why I always bring my lunch from home.” Cody’s eyes are still on the carnage on her tray. “I guess you checked the roll, too,” he says.

Why can’t he just flirt with me? Maya silently fumes. That’s all she wanted, just a few minutes of harmless flirtation. Did he think she’d stopped so she could drown him in pea soup made with the blood of lambs? Did he think she’d gone over to him so he could give her a crash course in veganism for airheads?

“Oh, yeah,” says Maya. “Of course I did.”

It is only when she picks up her tray to beat a hasty retreat that she notices Sicilee, loitering a metre or so away by the garbage cans. Sicilee’s smile brightens as she mouths the word, “Touché!”