The Warrior Victorious

6

He held me tight in his arms as he stroked with all his strength, grunting and moaning out the delight he felt. He’d worked me into such a frenzy, that I couldn’t have kept myself from moaning along with him even if I’d wanted to. I needed what he was giving me, needed it badly, and only distantly wished that he’d also let me hold him instead of him alone holding me. I wanted to feel that I was sharing with him rather than just being given what he wanted to give, but he didn’t care to allow that. He was making it my place to take whatever I was given, and I was in no state to argue even a little. I burned for what he was giving me, and would have done almost anything to get it.

It wasn’t over quickly, not until he had given me what I needed and had taken what he wanted, and then we both lay unmoving for a while in the wrinkled, sweaty linen. I’d felt fairly well rested from the previous night’s sleep before the bout had begun, but the end of it hadn’t left me with anything like the same impression.

“You’ll find the injections will do that to you,” Kel-Ten said when he’d gotten his breath back, turning to his right side to put a hand on my thigh. “Make you uncontrollably hot, I mean. Twice last night and once this morning, and if I started you up again you’d find you couldn’t refuse. But you’re going to try refusing anyway, aren’t you, ‘sweet thing’? Just to make Kel-Ten happy?”

I looked up at his grinning face, feeling no least urge to share in his amusement. Three times now he’d goaded me into trying to deny him, and then he’d laughingly gone ahead and done as he pleased. Once he was in me, my interest in resisting him was thoroughly stroked away, but by then it was cooperation he wanted and not denial. I no longer doubted that he really did mean to try escaping that place, and that was a shame. I was beginning to want very much to walk away from him, but I couldn’t afford to do that.

“I think I’ll have a shower, and then we can sit down to breakfast,” he said, giving my thigh a last squeeze before starting to get up. “I have training classes this morning, and you’ll be going to them with me. You won’t be able to appreciate them, but I’m not doing it for you. I want to show off my new acquisition to those who come closest to sharing my point of view, and maybe lure them into asking to borrow you. Whether or not I’ll agree is something you won’t know until it happens—or doesn’t happen. That should keep you on your toes. ”

His grin was chock-full of amusement, but during his speech he’d glanced at me in a way that said I was to pay close attention to what I saw in those training classes. His reasons for taking me there were more involved than the one he’d mentioned aloud, but that didn’t mean he’d overlook the spoken reason. Do nothing to arouse suspicion was his motto, and he’d stick to that no matter what I had to go through to see it done.

“Personally, Iii like a bath,” I said, pushing myself to sitting before running my hands through my hair. “You’ve made the one I took last night absolutely worthless. ”

“Not absolutely,” he contradicted, still enjoying himself. “We got rid of that reagent, which might have made you think twice about trying to argue with me. But don’t bother getting up. You don’t have my permission to take another bath.”

“But why not?” I demanded, more than startled by his refusal. “How can it possibly matter to you if I bathe?”

“It doesn’t matter to me,” he answered, grinning down at me where I sat on the bed. “What does matter is that you have to learn how to listen to me, and I think this is a good place to start teaching you the lesson. Eventually you won’t be doing anything without my permission, but that’s a point you’ll have to work up to.”

“And if I decide to take a bath anyway?” I asked, pushed into putting the question by his insufferable attitude. “What will you do if I simply ignore you and act as I please? Hurt me? Send me back to be worked over by those low-grade sadists? What if I don’t care what you do?”

“Oh, but you do care,” he contradicted, still grinning as he brought his big, naked body back to the bed. I’d been trying to tell him there was only so much I was willing to take even with escape as an objective, but the message didn’t seem to be getting through to him. “You won’t care if I hurt you or let others do it, but you do and will care if I decide on something else. Would you like to spend the morning—and maybe the afternoon as well-as hot as you were just a few minutes ago? With no one to kiss you and make it all better? Under those circumstances, which do you think would be worse: being tied up and left here to squirm at an empty apartment, or be taken with me so my friends can see you? Friends who might even help the squirming along a little. Would you like to make your decision now, so I can get started with it?”

He put one knee on the bed and leaned forward onto his palms, as though about to come back to where I sat. I tried telling myself he would never really do that to me, humiliating me in front of everyone, but that was a lie that didn’t even need thinking about. In order to avoid suspicion he was prepared to put me through hell, and for some reason I wasn’t surprised. Just looking at him seemed to tell me he would always do exactly what he had to, whether or not I agreed, even if I were hurt. He was really a very handsome man, blond, blue-eyed, broad-shouldered and strongly made, but the one most important thing in his life wasn’t me.

“It looks like you win again,” I said, moving my eyes to the very big gold and white bed I sat on. “Another challenge successfully met for you to take pride in.”

“And don’t you forget it,” he said, but the satisfaction I’d been expecting in his voice didn’t surface, and the previous amusement he’d shown had faded. “No one will ever have any doubt as to which of us is boss. Now get belly down facing the door, and keep watching for me to get back. I also want you to learn to be eager to see me.”

I didn’t hesitate long before stretching out the way he’d told me to do, but I was expecting some sort of comment about how he’d have to teach me to move faster. When it didn’t come I glanced up to where he was standing, but didn’t understand the expression on his face. There was more disturbance in his frown than impatience, more upset in his eyes than amusement. Then what I’d thought I’d seen was gone, and he moved forward to pat me on the head.

“That’s a good girl,” he said, as though talking to a pet. “You wait right there, and when I get back we’ll feed you.”

After praising his little animal he strolled out of the room, leaving me an empty doorway to watch breathlessly until he returned. I wondered in passing if I could disobey him by watching breathfully instead, shook my head at the ridiculousness of it all, then spent some time glancing around the room. I hadn’t seen much of it when I’d been dragged into it the night before, but my impression that any number of athletic games could have been played in it without the players feeling crowded wasn’t far from from the mark. It was only a little smaller than the visitors’ room, and someone must have decided to bring a bit of relief to the overall color scheme of the apartment. Instead of being all gold it was gold and white, but use of the second color had been minimal. The giant octagonal bed I lay on had some of the white, specifically in its wooden headboard and thick but nearly weightless cover. The sheets and pillowcases were a gleaming gold, though, and I’d been surprised to find they weren’t silk. Couches and chairs and lounges and tables were scattered neatly all through the rest of the room, and one wall, the one currently to my left, was all mirrors. If it hadn’t been part of an apartment that had to be earned, it would definitely have been too much.

Kel-Ten took his time at showering, and when he strolled back in he grinned in my direction as he made his way toward the mirrored wall. His grin said he liked the idea that I was right where he’d left me, to be taken advantage of or ignored as he saw fit. Personally I hated the idea, but with nothing else to do I’d been forced into thinking about what he’d said and was finally seeing the point. He was trying to show those watching how much fun he was getting out of keeping me, establishing a reason for continuing our association. I had the feeling I was supposed to keep on grumbling and complaining before obeying, but wasn’t to try not obeying. He was going to do everything he could to get me mad, and then would force me to listen to him. An unending time of fun and pleasure, but not for the little animal chosen to amuse him. He was boss so he was the one who had to be pleased and the little animal didn’t matter at all.

My happy owner slid one section of the mirror wall aside and took out clothing for himself, the sort of very short pants and sleeveless shirt the men had been wearing the day before at lunch time in the dining room. He also chose a pair of tie-on athletic shoes, and it wasn’t long before he was dressed. I couldn’t understand how he wasn’t sick to death of the color gold, now the color of everything he wore, but his glance into the mirror was pleased rather than nauseated. After confirming the perfection of his reflection he reached into the closet again, pulled something out before reclosing it, then turned and came toward me carrying what he’d taken out.

“You need something to wear, and this is what I’ve decided on,” he said as he neared the bed, then tossed me what he was holding. “I don’t have to dress you in anything, but I don’t care to leave anyone in doubt as to whose you are. Put it on and let me see how it looks.”

There wasn’t much to the thing he’d thrown to me but I sat up and pulled it on, getting to my knees to urge it as far down as it would go. It was no stunning shock to find that my new clothing was gold in color, and it didn’t take long to recognize the thing for what it was: a sleeveless shirt like the one he wore, only one that had been torn at the front of its rounded neck. It was made of that new material that has an unbelievable amount of stretch in it, so that a single size will fit a very wide range of forms. Its twin fit Kel-Ten tightly but apparently not uncomfortably, which meant I couldn’t quite believe how tight it was on me. It also stretched down to the middle of my thighs, but that was not what I considered a positive point. Positive would have been if it came down, at the very least, to my knees.

“Don’t tell me,” I said, looking up at him after inspecting myself in that-shirt. “You’ve decided you don’t like the smock I was given to wear yesterday morning, but not because it matters. Only because this is the way you want to do things. If I complain, I get to wear nothing at all.”

“Certainly not,” he disagreed with a grin, getting a good deal of enjoyment out of looking me over. “If you complain you get to wear a gold neck ribbon and bow, which certainly can’t be called nothing. Come over here so I can make that look a little better.”

If I’d had any choice at all I would have stayed right where I was, but choice was something I’d given up in the name of escape. I crawled to the end of the bed and then got to my feet, and Kel-Ten came closer still wearing his grin. His hands reached out to raise my chin a little, and then he was pulling hard at the material, adding to the tear already in the top of the shirt. He kept ripping until the cleavage was almost to my navel, and then he let go and stepped back again.

“And to think I almost threw that shirt away when it was torn during a friendly little tussle in physical exercise class,” he said, so pleased with what he’d done that his grin had widened. “That just goes to show you never know when something will turn out handy rather than damaged. I think I have more of an appetite now than I did before, so let’s go get something to eat.”

“You can’t seriously expect me to walk around in this,” I said, caught unawares when he simply turned and headed out of the room. I had to hurry after him in an effort to catch up, which made me feel even more ridiculous. “This may well be worse than what they forced me to wear last night! Kel-Ten, listen to me!”

“But I am listening to you,” he answered, stopping in the doorway to turn and look at me. “What I’m not sure about is what I’m hearing. Did I hear you say you’d rather go naked?”

I slowed abruptly, more because of his stare than to keep from running into him. He was still having a lot of fun, but that doesn’t mean he was joking. I could feel my cheeks heating up badly at the thought of being dragged around that complex naked, and that was the answer he was looking for.

“I thought so,” he said with a pleasant nod, reaching to take my hand. “Let’s go and have breakfast.”

The bedroom had turned out to be the door to the left off the hall past the bathroom, which made the door in the end wall the only one we hadn’t used. Kel-Ten remedied that by opening it and pulling me through, into a kitchen that matched the rest of the apartment. This time there was a bright rose to relieve the monotony of the gold, an effort to make the room look cheerful and happy rather than cold and formal. I was taken to the golden table and pushed into a comfortable gold and rose chair, and then my hand was released.

“You go ahead while I decide what I want,” Kel-Ten said, indicating the oblong in the table where my fingers were meant to touch. “I’m in the mood for something different this morning, but I don’t yet know what.”

He had taken the chair right next to mine, and with a touch of his hand under the table had made a menu appear in the table top. It seemed to be a menu with quite a lot of listings, and I didn’t understand that.

“I thought all diets were carefully regulated,” I said, startled by the two or three entries I could read without craning my neck. Most chefs didn’t stock dishes requiring such complex preparation, and there was even one I’d heard about but had never managed to taste. “Or does that go only for dining room meals?”

“Location has nothing to do with it,” he answered, glancing at me with an amusement that should have warned me. “It’s you girls who have carefully regulated diets; we men can eat anything we please as long as we stay in decent physical shape. We’re not the ones who get pregnant, after all. A girl who stays the night in a Prime’s apartment is sometimes given a special tidbit if she’s been especially good, but even we aren’t allowed to ruin what the the dieticians decide on for you. Touch the plate, and my chef will deliver whatever it is you’re supposed to have.”

He went back to his perusal of the menu then, leaving me to sit silent but furious. I hated being watched and controlled so completely, hated having everything decided for me without my own wishes being consulted. My stomach had been letting me know about the meals I’d missed the day before, but the hunger pangs were a lot less than I would have expected them to be. It was just as though I hadn’t been eating so regularly lately that missing a few meals was something to take special notice of, but that was silly. I always ate regular meals, and I’d grown more slender than I was usually was because-because- Well, probably because I’d been on a diet or had been working especially hard. I ran a hand through my hair, frustrated over not being able to remember, but there was something I did remember. If you miss enough meals You’ll die of malnutrition no matter who doesn’t want it happening, no matter how hard they try to stop it. The realization made me feel a good deal better, and Kel-Ten couldn’t say- I hadn’t warned him. I’d said that if I could find a way to die I would take it, and it looked like I just might have done exactly that.

“Touching the plate won’t do me any good,” I said, trying to sound surly and resentful instead of filled with satisfaction. “I was told yesterday that I was being punished, and wouldn’t be allowed to eat until someone decided I could and I was specifically given permission. I haven’t been given that permission yet.”

“That’s ridiculous,” Kel-Ten said, looking up from the menu with a frown. “You’re already clearly underweight, and you’re starting to lose color. In all the years I’ve been here, I’ve never heard of them doing anything so—”

His words broke off as he looked at me, and I suddenly had the awful feeling he was remembering what I’d told him as clearly as I did. If I’d had any intelligence at all I would have kept quiet and not given any warning, but some part of me had insisted that wasn’t fair. I’d found it very necessary to be fair, but the next minute that fairness did me in.

“So you’re being punished,” Kel-Ten said, no longer in any way amused with me. “If that’s true, then touching the plate will prove it. If they don’t want you eating, they’ll have directed the chef not to give you anything. Let’s just see.”

I tried to keep him from taking my hand, but he had very little trouble ignoring my efforts. After forcing my fingers open he pressed them to the plate, then sat back to stare at me while I rubbed at my hand. He’d hurt me in his attempt to test his theory, but not so much that the pain became my greatest concern. I knew his chef would cause considerably more damage, and it wasn’t long before I was proven right. Much too quickly the delivery slot in the center of the table raised up, and an unreasonably large number of dishes were pushed out.

“What was that you said a minute ago?” Kel-Ten asked, moving angry eyes from the delivery to me. “You’re not being allowed food, or you’re not being allowed everything edible in the complex? From the looks of that meal, the dieticians are even more unhappy with your weight than I am. I don’t know what you thought you’d gain by lying to me, but I guarantee it’ll turn out to be nothing like what you were expecting. As soon as I have the time, you’re getting punished. Now take that food and start eating it.”

“And if I don’t?” I countered, his anger making mine flare in response-even if I did feel as though I were repeating myself like a faulty recording. “I’m not used to eating when I have no appetite, and every time I turn around in this place something happens to ruin what appetite I do have. If you and they want me to eat, you can all leave me alone. Maybe not being bothered for a while will make me hungry again.”

“If you don’t eat on your own, they’ll force-feed you,” he came back, his angry gaze sharp as he answered only my question and ignored the rest of what I’d said. “I saw it done a couple of times, and you won’t believe how unpleasant it is until you’re the one it happens to. They make everything as close to a liquid as they can, and then they use a tube to put it directly into your stomach. One of the girls I watched tried throwing up, and to teach her not to do it again they took what she’d brought up and made her swallow it without the tube. If you’d prefer doing it that way go right ahead, I don’t mind watching it again.”

Meaning there was no way he would lie for me and say I’d eaten when I hadn’t. I moved around in the chair he’d put me in, completely nauseated by the story he’d told, feeling his eyes on me even though I wasn’t looking at him. Considering the fact that a dead partner would be of very little use to him, his attitude wasn’t terribly surprising. He was going to keep me alive until we could escape, another unpleasant truth I was wasting my time trying to ignore. I hesitated no more than an additional moment, staring at the edge of the gold table in an effort to regain control of myself, then reached for the first of the dishes.

“How nice to see reason prevailing,” he said, his tone dry and not quite back to being amused. “Don’t even think about leaving any of that over, or I’ll make sure your section leader finds out. I happen to know what she’ll have done to you, and you really won’t care for it. I will, but you certainly won’t.”

Good humor had returned to him with the last of his words, and the mood seemed to help him make his breakfast decision. He dialed his choice from the chef and took it eagerly when it came, then proceeded to make the rest of the meal more silent than the beginning had been. His food smelled a whole lot better than mine, something I was sure he was aware of, and he even went so far as to offer me a taste of it. I ignored the offer and just kept working my way through the plain and very healthy food I’d been given, having no desire for anything better. I didn’t even have a desire for what I was eating, but others had decided on desire for me.

By the time the meal was over, I was thinking seriously about being depressed. I’d expected to have trouble finishing so many different items of food, but each portion had proven to be exactly the right amount, and before I knew it everything was down my throat. Even the large glass of swed was just right for the meal provided, and it really bothered me that they knew my capacity and needs so well that they’d known just what to give me. Being still hungry or terribly stuffed would have been much more pleasant, but they weren’t trying to make things pleasant for me. They were trying to keep me alive and healthy, to make sure I served their high and noble purposes.

“It’s time for us to get going,” Kel-Ten announced into the brooding silence I was wrapped in, taking the empty swed glass out of my hands before getting to his feet and pulling me up after him. “My first class is a relaxer, to let me digest my meal in peace, and after that the heavy stuff starts. I also haven’t checked my schedule for today, so we’ll begin with that. Come this way first.”

His “this way” turned out to be a stop in the bathroom, where I was allowed to see to my bodily functions—but not privately—and then had my hair brushed by him. Hair brushing without first bathing and/or washing was ludicrous, which meant the action fit in very well with the rest of what had been done to me in that place. When I was groomed to my owner’s satisfaction, we left the apartment.

Since wed taken a lift up to the apartment the night before, it wasn’t entirely unexpected that we needed a drop to go down again. We emerged onto a floor different from the one the dining room was on, but not different where posh was concerned. The red carpeting was top quality, the walls paneled and hung with artwork, the lighting source excellently invisible, the ceilings high enough to accommodate a gathering area that large. Men dressed like Kel-Ten filled the area, some sitting on the cream-colored furniture, some standing around, some strolling from group to group or place to place, all looking perfectly relaxed and at home. I was led into the midst of them by a briskly strolling Kel-Ten as though I were nothing special or of particular importance, but most of the conversations slowed and died as we passed. We went through a good part of the area before stopping in front of a large glass board with electronic notices neatly posted all over it, and that was where some of the men suddenly decided to go as well.

“Good morning, Kel-Ten,” a man in red greeted my companion pleasantly but respectfully, looking at me rather than at the man he addressed. “I hadn’t noticed what a really pretty morning it was until you got here, but now I can see it clearly. Yes, sir, more than clearly.”

“It’s supposed to rain today, Ank-Soh,” Kel-Ten said without turning away from the board, his observation casual and accompanied by his tapping a finger against one of the items in the glass. “The window I looked out of earlier seemed to confirm that, but maybe my windows don’t face the way yours do. I hate running outside when it rains.”

“Oh, it shouldn’t be all that bad,” the man Ank-Soh came back, a grin on his face as he continued to stare at me. “Who cares if you come back wet and cold, as long as you have something to dry you off and warm you up? You wouldn’t find me minding if I had all that, especially if it was scowling and blushing with embarrassment instead of bouncing with eagerness. You never know how much you’ll miss having a woman trying to say no, until you don’t have it any more. And what did you do to get them to let you keep her like that?”

“Her?” Kel-Ten echoed, as though he had no idea what the other man was talking about, and then he turned away from the board to show heavy, overdone revelation. “Oh, you’re talking about sweet thing here. I’d almost forgotten I had her with me. I didn’t do anything, Ank-Soh, except for what I always do, which is continuing to be First Prime. I’m teaching her to behave herself while I keep her, so maybe they think I’m doing them a favor and that’s why they’re not trying to take her back. She’s been fun so far, but who knows how long the fun will last? By the time she’s ready for her first covering, I might be bored again.”

“If you are, then I’m next in line to try for the privilege,” Ank-Soh murmured, his dark eyes bright as he reached two fingers out and used them to stroke the side of my breast. The extended tear in the shirt made a touch like that easy to accomplish, but in my opinion he didn’t have the right to do something like that. Without even thinking about it I stepped back away from his fingers, and his grin widened as he and Kel-Ten both began to chuckle.

“Don’t forget I said ‘might,’” Kel-Ten stressed to the other man, his amusement clear as his hands came to my arms from behind. “Even when she obeys me she does it reluctantly, and that’s one of the things I like best. Go ahead and touch her, and you’ll understand what I mean. ”

The hands on my arms tightened to hold me in place, which meant I couldn’t avoid Ank-Soh’s casually reaching fingers a second time. The man in red stroked the side of my breast lightly, then deliberately reached his entire hand inside the shirt to squeeze my breast gently but possessively. I tried to twist out of Kel-Ten’s grip and away from the insult of being touched like that, but the man behind me held me in place while the one in front of me kept on with his amusement. It continued for a time that was short but infuriating, and then Ank-Soh’s grin widened again.

“Those green eyes would broil me to a cinder if they could,” he said with a laugh of pure delight, still moving his fingers on my flesh. “Not only is she damned goodlooking, but she’d hate it if I started dipping her. What’s your schedule like, Kel-Ten? Any chance you’ll be so tied up you won’t notice if someone borrows her for an hour or two?”

“Sorry, Ank-Soh, but I only have three scheduled for today,” my owner answered with a laugh of his own, nothing of regret to be heard in his voice. “I’ll need sweet thing to keep me entertained the rest of the time, so you’re out of luckat least for now. Tomorrow could turn out to be different.”

“Then I’ll check with you again tomorrow,” Ank-Soh said, withdrawing his hand with what seemed like real reluctance. “Right now I think I’ll skip relaxation class and find one of the rings I’m assigned to cover. If I don’t, I’ll never survive heavy ex. And if they try taking her away to make her like the others, let me know and I’ll help you organize a general riot. See you later, my friend—and you, too, sweet thing.”

He tapped me lightly under the chin before turning and walking away, and Kel-Ten chuckled as he finally let me go.

“I knew you’d be popular, sweet thing,” he murmured, patting me on the backside. “Ank-Soh is one of the two Primes one step directly below me, and thinks that when he gets around to challenging me he’ll win. One more minute of touching your knob, and he would have projected his rock to every man in a thirty-five foot radius. The board says he has a challenge of his own to meet today, and how much would you like to bet he wins it without half trying?”

“Why don’t I bet everything I own?” I muttered in answer, trying to control a temper that was rising much too fast. “And what will you do if I suddenly decide to play cow to every bull you stand me in front of? No novelty means no interest, the best way I can think of to keep their hands off me.”

“You, stand there and play cow?” he asked, coming around to stare down at me with brows raised high. “Are you forgetting I’m the one who’s supposed to make the jokes? If you ever stood there and took it without complaining, I’d rush you to Medical to find out what was wrong with you. Let’s get going, and I’ll give you a tour of this place.”

He took my hand and moved off again, through the crowds of men who were now for the most part staring. A number of them were staring with interest, but at least the same number were staring with disapproving frowns on their faces. I thought I was the only one to notice that, but once we were past them and walking up a very wide corridor with lift doors on either side, Kel-Ten made a soft sound of disgust.

“Those jerks,” he muttered, making no effort to look back. “They’re afraid to face any woman who isn’t crazy about them from first to last, but they still expect to win challenges and make it to the top of the list. They still haven’t figured out that the name of the game is confidence, something you have in everything or don’t have in anything. To your left over there is the rec area for high girls, to the right the exercise areas for Primes. Physical exercise is taken by all Primes together no matter what their grade, and they separate only later on, when it’s time for serious work. Low Primes get to look at high girls, but touching is out until they make high status. Most of the high girls are no better than the low girls, but it’s the principle of the thing.”

Wed stopped at the end of the corridor to look around at the very large open area that stretched both left and right, but open only in the sense that it was made of windows that let anyone standing there look out. Couches and chairs of leather covered the uncarpeted area, making it a nice place to sit and take in the sun on days when there was visible sun in the sky. That particular day was dark and overcast with the promise of rain, which was enough to make the wide expanse feel cold despite the warmth of the interior heating system.

“What’s this high and low you all keep talking about?” I asked, suppressing a shiver as I looked away from the heavy clouds not far above the transparent roof. “And why does the term ‘Prime’ refer only to men in this place? I’ve been a Prime long enough to find the differentiation petty as well as stupid.”

“That’s only because you weren’t a Prime here,” he answered, faintly amused again. “Once you’re here a while you’ll understand that that’s the only way it can possibly work, the only way they can get what they want. The men here are trained hard to use their abilities in a way empaths have never before been trained, and once they get to a certain stage they’re out—and-out dangerous. Considering what they need from the women, how smart would it be to train them to be just as dangerous? A trained Prime can say no and make it stick, which would put an end to the breeding of even more Primes. They need their supply more than they need trained women, so the females around here are just girls.”

He looked around, spotted a couch he seemed to approve of, walked over to it, then pulled me down next to him as he sprawled comfortably.

“High and low status,” he said, getting ready to lecture on the subject as he locked his hands behind his head. “For Primes, high and low comes about by how quickly you learn and how well you do in challenges. As soon as your mind starts opening out you can get involved in challenging for higher level positions, but some men never get to that point. Their minds seem frozen and totally inflexible, unable to get much beyond where they already are. They start out low and never get past that, but since research shows they can sire sons who can get past the block or whatever it is, they aren’t kicked out to panhandle oh street corners. They stay low, and service the girls who are low.

“All girls are low when they first come into this facility, even the ones who were raised in the creches a few miles away. Low for girls means unrated, and rating comes only after their first Prime fetus is brought to term by one of the host mothers. Average output in this place has come to be one Prime offspring for every ten pregnancies, and any girl who does better than that is raised to high status and assigned to high Primes. They also have better living quarters, areas to relax and have fun in, and contests to see which of them can produce the most male Prime offspring. They’re given parties and fussed over for every fifth male Prime baby, and there are charts in their quarters showing where each of them stands in the contest. Every time the reports are due to be updated, they get so excited you can hear them jumping and squealing from three floors away.”

“If you were trying to make me nauseous, you’ve managed it,” I told him from where I sat on the very edge of the couch, not joking in the least. “I now understand why they use conditioning, and how compassionate they are to do it. Are they gentle with the ones who go crazy from living a life like that?”

“None of them go crazy, and you won’t either,” he said, unlocking his hands to lean up and pull me to him. “I doubt if anyone will be expecting you to jump around clapping your hands and squealing, so no one will be disappointed when you don’t. Your spare time will be filled by me and those like me, so you won’t have much opportunity to brood. All in all it should be a lot of fun.”

“Fun!” The one word exploded out of me with such outrage that he began to laugh, something I could feel through the chest I was being held against. I could also feel his hand where it rose beneath the hem of my shirt to rub my bottom, but before I could even start to struggle out of his grip a gentle chiming sounded. The chiming was obviously a signal of sorts, as he immediately let me go, got to his feet, then pulled me up beside him.

“That’s the official signal for the start of the day, and for the first time in a long time I’m eager to start with it,” he said, sending me a grin before moving off to the right of the couch wed been on. “I knew you’d be good for me, but I hadn’t realized just how good. Yes, sweet thing, we are going to have fun.”

Which was the last we had in the way of conversation for a while. He pulled me with him to a large room where I was put into a corner, then was left to watch while he and the other men who entered spent their time on their knees with their eyes closed, alternating between breathing strangely and remaining absolutely unmoving. The goings on held my fascinated attention for a good ten seconds, and after that there was nothing to occupy me but boredom. Over the last couple of days I’d been given enough to think about, but the picture drawn for me of the life of a high female Prime in that place had made me too depressed to want to think.

After breathing and playing tree, the men went to a big gym area and I got to go with them. They were put through quite a lot of exercise that got heavier and more complex as it went along, and after an exquisitely monotonous amount of time they were led toward a set of doors and through them. The doors obviously led outside, an observation reinforced by the presence of white-uniformed male Sees, but although that was one destination I wouldn’t have minded being dragged to, I didn’t get to go along. I’d been left in the keeping of one of the Sees, and he made sure I stayed seated on the floor where Kel-Ten had left me, amused over my annoyance but firm in his decision. Kel-Ten didn’t want me wandering around, so seated was the way I would stay until he came back.

That, I suppose, was the point I gave up trying to keep from thinking. There’s only so much boredom you can take even when you’re depressed, and I had the distinct impression the men would not be coming back in anything like a little while. If there had only been the major points of disturbance coming at me I could have held them off a good deal longer, but I was being prodded by minor points that were more confusing than upsetting. None of them seemed to fit, and my thoughts went to poking at them even before I sighed and joined in.

The men were being trained to be “dangerous,” and the higher the level they reached, the more dangerous they were considered to be. No one seemed willing to discuss what they were being trained for, but that wasn’t the part bothering me so much. I knew a fully developed Prime was dangerous; even with the reasons for the knowledge locked behind that door in my mind, I was far from uncertain. What didn’t quite match that unsupported knowledge were the things I’d heard Kel-Ten and even Jer-Mar saying, things that made no sense. Jer-Mar had boasted that he’d been able to split a projection in two and hold it for a full thirty seconds. Kel-Ten had said that Ank-Soh, one of the two men right below his own exalted position, would have projected to “every man in a thirty-five foot radius” if he’d lost control of himself.

Those were supposed to be high accomplishments? That was what brought them promotion and rewards and even fear from Sees who didn’t happen to be nulls? Baby tricks like that?

I made a sound of frustration as I leaned back against the wall I was sitting in front of, drawing another amused glance from the Sec standing near me. He hadn’t been shy about inspecting me with his eyes when I’d first been left with him, and he’d obviously considered it very funny when I’d kept my knees together by bending both my legs to the left beside me after sitting down. I had the distinct impression he would have enjoyed making use of me, but Mera had been right when shed said we had nothing to fear from the male Sees in the men’s areas. It wasn’t that they weren’t interested in us, only that they weren’t permitted to touch us, and I wondered if it really was fear of the Primes, as Mera had suggested, that made sure they obeyed the rules.

Fear of Primes who strutted around because they could do baby tricks.

I couldn’t hold back another sound, this time one of annoyance, but my attention was no longer on the Sec or how he was taking my involuntary reactions. I knew beyond doubt that / could do more than the trained wonders the facility was so proud of, but that was all I seemed to know. Trying to reach my own ability was almost enough to make me forget I had an ability, the harder I tried, the more the memory faded. Obviously I had their conditioning to thank for that, and trying to press the point wouldn’t have made much sense. I was “turned off,” a state Kel-Ten said he would change, a state I wished I could stop thinking about. Some part of me seemed to consider the phrase very important, a key to something vital, but the rest of me hadn’t the faintest idea what that could be. It was adding to my frustration so badly I almost wished it was one of the things I’d been conditioned to ignore. They didn’t want me reaching what I could do, but knowing why I couldn’t do it was perfectly legal.

I fell so deeply into the mud pit of confusion and frustration, that the first I knew Kel-Ten was back was when he leaned down to tickle me in a rather sensitive place. I gasped and jumped, embarrassed and ready to be outraged, especially when the Sec joined him in laughing at me. The great Prime was covered in sweat, his blond hair hanging in strings, his pretty gold outfit soaked through and looking as though it should be thrown in the trash, but his blue eyes said he was still enjoying himself.

“I asked how you would like to take a shower with me,” he said, his grin more than mocking. “The number of other men showering with us shouldn’t bother you, not the way you like water, and if I should happen to think of something to do in addition to showering, you’ll be right there and handy. What do you say?”

“I say I’d rather stay dirty for the rest of my life,” I answered, getting to my feet to glare at him. I almost went on to tell him how little a shot he really was, but the anger inside me refused to let me be stupid. I could get as mad as I liked, as long as I kept quiet about things that could turn out to be an advantage at a later time.

“I wonder how I knew you were going to say that?” he mused, the grin still there and strong. “I think I’m learning to read-your mind even if I can’t reach it. And what a handy talent it’s proving, too, since I’ve already made arrangements for you to do something else while I’m showering. Come along, sweet thing.”

He took my hand and then I was being pulled along behind him again, toward the door leading out of the gym into the corridor. I would have hated being treated like that even if his hand hadn’t been as sweaty as the rest of him, but there wasn’t much I could do to stop it. I was his brand new toy, and people played with their toys just as they liked.

Rather than going back toward the central area of couches and windows, Kel-Ten led me more deeply into the men’s areas. A couple of minutes worth of walking brought us to an unmarked, light brown door, and before I could ask any questions my owner had it open and I was being taken through it. Inside were two men, one in Security white and one in Medical brown, and they both looked around when we appeared.

“Right on time, Prime Kel-Ten,” the man in brown said with a smile as he walked toward us. “We appreciate this more than words can say. Your generous cooperation won’t be forgotten, I can assure you of that.”

“I’ll make certain it isn’t, Gerdoh,” Kel-Ten answered with a grin, pulling me closer to the other man by the hand he still held. “If you need to check her to be sure I haven’t damaged her, go right ahead and check away. The only other thing you also have to make sure of is that when I come back to get her, I find the same girl I’m leaving. If you-improve-her the way you and your group like doing to everything female coming past you, you’ll be gifted with something besides generous cooperation that won’t be forgotten. You have my word on it.”

“Now, now, Prime Kel-Ten, we have no intentions of taking her away from you or doing anything that would displease you,” the Medical man said in a soothing way, raising one hand but pot using it to touch the hard-eyed Prime he spoke to. “You’ve earned the right to have the girl any way you wish, as long as she’s well cared for. We’ll simply assure ourselves of her continuing good health, and then you may have her back.”

“As long as we both know where we stand, she’s all yours,” Kel-Ten said lightly, finally letting my hand go. “You can tell your Class Zero Sec over there to relax, I need a shower more than I need a fight. Right now, that is.”

He gave the man Gerdoh a very amused grin, then turned and left the room without bothering to see to the door he’d left open. The Sec followed behind and closed the door quietly, and the Medical man took a deep breath and let it out slowly.

“I don’t care what anyone tells me, I can feel their minds pushing at mine whenever one of them talks to me,” he muttered, possibly to the Sec or maybe to the empty air. “If that’s what they’re like when they’re reasonably calm, I don’t ever want to get one of them angry at me. Most especially not that one.”

He shuddered just a little at the thought, clearly impressed with the man called First Prime, then put his disturbing ideas behind him. He was a fairly tall but rather thin man with very straight black hair and brown eyes, and I knew he was ready to get down to business when he squared his narrow shoulders and smiled patronizingly in my direction.

“And how are we feeling this morning, Terry?” he asked, his tone suggesting we were friends of long standing. “The Prime indulged himself rather extensively between last evening and this morning. Are we possibly a bit sore now?”

“Maybe you are,” I answered, trying to ignore the warmth in my cheeks as I folded my arms and looked at the man. “I hadn’t realized he’d indulged himself with you as well as me, but I feel fine. If you’ve developed a problem, though, I’d suggest abstaining for a while.”

The man Gerdoh blinked at me in confusion for a moment while the Sec chuckled, and then he sent me a frown.

“My dear girl, there’s really no need to be insulting,” he said, less in anger than in wounded protest. “We’ve had you brought here to be certain you haven’t been harmed, and will continue to see to your well-being as best we may. It’s a pity the Prime wants to keep you as you are, he has no real idea how difficult he’s making things for you, but he mustn’t be denied. My superiors are delighted with the change in him, and don’t care to see him returned to the-destructive-frame of mind he was previously in. Since you now know my question was far from idle, I would appreciate your answering me.”

“I’ve already answered you,” I said, feeling that strange anger beginning to rise in me again. “As though it really mattered. If it turns out that he did hurt me, will you take me away from him or punish him for doing it? Of course you will, why am I wasting time asking? As concerned as everyone is about me, how can there be any question?”

“Now, now, you have your value just as he has his,” the man tried to soothe me, his properly correct smile meant to be reassuring. “If he’s hurt you he’ll be spoken to, to see that it doesn’t happen again. Come over here and lie down on the table, please. I’m afraid I’ll need to examine you.”

He turned away from me and began moving toward the table he’d mentioned, the same sort of table thered been in the room the woman in yellow had taken me to. Even if I hadn’t been angry I wouldn’t have gone near a thing like that again, but I’d forgotten-about the Sec. As soon as he knew for certain I wasn’t about to move from where I stood on my own, his big hand circled my arm and pulled me forward with no difficulty at all. He was one of the biggest men I’d ever seen, larger even than KelTen, the difference between them enough to be noticed.

“When you’re given an order, pretty girl, you’d better learn to obey it,” he said, his dark eyes looking down at me with something not too different from amusement. “The doctor wants you on the table, so that’s where you’re going to be put.”

“Gently, man, gently,” Gerdoh cautioned him nervously, turning back to watch as the Sec ignored my struggling and lifted me onto the table. “If the Prime returns to find her bruised, there’s no telling what he may do.”

“There isn’t much he can do to me,” the Sec answered with almost total unconcern, paying more attention to holding me down on the table than to the man he was talking to. “If he closes his eyes he can’t see me, which means all he can try using is his hands. If he’s stupid enough to do that, he won’t be in any condition to even look in your direction.”

The arrogance in the Sec’s eyes added to his faint smile as he held me down, and the shudder that had touched Gerdoh earlier came back to see that I had my own turn with it. A Class Zero was a null, and the thought of nulls had always frightened me in a way I couldn’t completely understand. I remembered that nulls couldn’t be touched by empaths, that their emotions were hidden away on a level none of us could reach, which meant even the strongest of us had reason to be wary of them. Wary, yes, but wariness doesn’t account for the presence of fear—and didn’t explain why something he’d said had struck me as strange. If he closes his eyes he can’t see me, he’d said, but does not seeing something mean it isn’t there? If it doesn’t, what does it mean?

“Now, now, you know well enough our superiors don’t want him hurt,” Gerdoh fussed in agitation, sounding as though he were the one who needed the soothing and reassurance. “If we do nothing to antagonize him, it won’t be necessary to concern ourselves with the possibility of official censure. Young woman, if you don’t stop kicking like that, I’m going to have to bind your ankles.

From the sound of his voice Gerdoh was now annoyed with me, but I couldn’t have cared less. The Sec hadn’t let me go once he’d put me on the table, and he was leaning so close I couldn’t even see the Medical man where he stood a few steps behind him. Dark-haired and dark-eyed, the man wasn’t all that unattractive, but the point bothering me was what he was, not what he looked like. I tried telling myself my heart was hammering because of the way I struggled to get free from his arms and hands, an explanation that might also have covered why my mouth was dry, but if I’d said any of that aloud the Sec would have laughed. He knew I was afraid of him, and the knowledge made him grin as he stared down at me. I twisted harder against him, trying to push him away, then had to cry out in protest even though it was already too late.

“Now, now, you were warned, you know.” Gerdoh said distractedly in answer to my wordless shout, undoubtedly watching as the soft cloth he’d looped around my ankles retracted toward the table. “We haven’t all the time in the world, and if you refuse to cooperate like a good girl you’ll just have to pay the price. If you like, Adjin, you can use the wrist bindings instead of having to hold her.”

“It’s no trouble holding her,” the Sec answered sounding casual but showing a wider grin. Then he leaned even closer to me and said in a very low voice, “I’ll bet you’re a good girl even when you don’t cooperate. Oh, yes, a very good girl.”

I refused to shiver where the null could see it, but that doesn’t mean the shiver never happened. He had his left arm around my body and his right hand holding my right wrist, the arm of that hand doing far too much in keeping my left arm down and pinned between us. With my ankles tight to the table I could scarcely move, but I still gasped and tried to jump when Gerdoh began his examination. Those in charge of the facility were anxious to know if their top stud had damaged the little mare with his boyish enthusiasm, but not because they gave a damn about the mare. They were worried about her because they still had to breed her, and if she were damaged they would lose the use of her.

It’s difficult to be angry and frightened and embarrassed all at the same time, but somehow I managed it. Gerdoh’s examination was as far from arousing as you can get, and being held like that by the Sec while it was going on made it worse than any internal I’d ever had. I squirmed as hard as I could in an effort to stop it, and got just as far as one would expect; Gerdoh was ignoring me, and the Sec Adjin was simply enjoying himself. I really believed it was as bad as it could reasonably become, forgetting briefly how unreasonable that place actually was until the Sec’s fingers left my wrist after pushing my arm more nearly under his body. He wanted his hand free so that he could slide it into the tear in my shirt, that tear everyone seemed to find so irresistible. I gasped again as his fingers closed painfully on my breast, trying for the fiftieth time to struggle free, but nothing had changed. The null held me down while he groped me, and Gerdoh never knew anything was happening.

It wasn’t all that long before the examination was over, it only felt like forever. When Gerdoh got off the stool he’d been perched on, Adjin’s hand left its comfortable nest, no abrupt movement, no guilty start, just a calm shifting from one place to another that the medical man never noticed. Very briefly I’d considered telling the man supposedly in charge just what was being done to me while he was so engrossed in his work, but I couldn’t seem to do it. The look in the Sec’s dark eyes really frightened me, a heart-fluttering coldness that said nothing so terrible would happen to him if I told, nothing that would keep him from coming after me later to show how unhappy he was. I didn’t want him coming after me later, didn’t want him near me ever again, and just keeping quiet seemed like the best way to make that happen.

“I’m pleased to report that you’ve taken the Prime’s vigorous efforts with no difficulty whatsoever,” Gerdoh said, actually sounding as pleased as he claimed to be. “It’s almost as though you’ve been accustomed to use of that sort, but such an idea would be ridiculously outlandish. Most probably you’re merely adapting well, and we need to do no more than remain alert against any possible future difficulties. The Prime is extremely fortunate in having chosen a woman so well suited to his situation, and we, of course, are even more delighted than he.”

He’d been moving around as he spoke, doing something I couldn’t see with the Sec in the way, but that didn’t last. He reappeared at the foot of the table and moved around to the other side of it, then gestured at the null with the injector he held.

“Turn her a bit more toward you and hold her still, Adjin,” he directed, back to being partially distracted. “She won’t enjoy this, and I don’t want her jumping at the wrong time and hurting herself.”

“What are you doing?” I demanded, vaguely wondering if words as shaky as mine could be called a demand.

The Sec had shifted his hold to turn me part way to him, the ankle bindings and his hand clamped tight to my thigh keeping me just the way Gerdoh wanted. I hated the idea of being given any more injections in that madhouse, but laboratory animals are never offered their choice. The needle went into me just above the Sec’s hand, and this time it hurt enough to make me cry out.

“There, there, it’s just about all done,” Gerdoh soothed mechanically as he paid attention to what he was doing, finally withdrawing the needle no more than an instant before I would have screamed. “We do have to be sure you’ll continue being able to accept what Prime Kel-Ten wants to give you, and my superiors were somewhat displeased with the way you attempted to refuse allowing Prime Ank-Soh’s touching of you. The Prime may have been amused by the novelty of the thing, but there’s really no reason for him or any other Prime to have to be subjected to something like that. If the next occurrence of a similar happening shows you being more amenable, your dosage will be reduced again.”

I detested self-satisfied voices like Gerdoh’s, almost as much as I detested the way the null ran his hand slowly over my bottom before letting me go completely. The Medical man had already turned away to rid himself of the injector, of course, and I just lay there on the table, tears trickling down my cheeks. I suppose I would have been happier if the tears were from frustration or anger, but even I was incapable of giving me happiness in that place. I was too miserable to be frustrated, too sunk in hopelessness to be angry, and pulling that ridiculous shirt back down to the middle of my thighs did nothing to make me feel better. Even a full uniform wouldn’t have kept me from being a walking invitation to violation, and the tears I cried were the terrible tears of helplessness.

By the time Kel-Ten came back for me my ankles had been freed and I was simply sitting on the table, but the flow of tears from my eyes hadn’t stopped. He was no longer covered in sweat and his gold outfit had also obviously been cleaned, but the grin he walked in with faded when he saw me. A heavy coldness darkened his light gaze as he strode to where I sat, and Gerdoh was already speaking even before the Prime’s arms went around me.

“Now, now, Prime Kel-Ten, she’s quite unharmed,” he said more hurriedly than soothingly, his nervousness obvious even to me. “She’s merely begun feeling the effects of her injection, effects which are making her extremely unhappy. She’ll need seeing to in the near future, but I would recommend not sooner than after lunch. A touch of discipline will do her no end of good, and we were asked by her section head to administer punishment to her if we found an opportunity.”

“Oh, yes, I’d forgotten about that,” Kel-Ten said, raising my face with one hand to examine me critically. “I can see from the way she’s blushing and squirming that is the only thing wrong with her, so you can stop thinking about which direction to run in, Gerdoh. And since I owe her some punishing of my own, I’ll take your suggestion about after lunch and may even add to it. I was going to cover one of my three rings after lunch, and if she doesn’t show me something to change my mind, I’ll make her sit there and watch.”

“An excellent thought, Prime Kel-Ten, an excellent thought,” Gerdoh laughed in relieved agreement, finally coming away from the side of the Sec he’d almost put himself behind. “Just to show my appreciation of your noble generosity, understanding and cooperation, I believe I’ll tell you now of the decision made by my superiors. They’ve concluded that an experiment of sorts is definitely in order, so they’ve altered the rules in regard to this female. When her first fertile period arrives, it’s you they mean to assign to cover her. In that way you won’t need to give her up for the time, and afterward there will be other high Primes doing the same. If her percentage turns out to be significantly higher than the norm, other unconditioned females will be experimented with. ”

“Say, now, I really appreciate that,” Kel -Ten said with a wide grin, his arm tightening possessively around me, his tone clearly delighted. “I can see you people are going out of your way to please me, and I won’t forget it. Come on, sweet thing, let’s go to lunch.”

He took my hand and pulled me off the table, then strode out of the room with me hurrying behind. He whistled as we moved along, obviously in the highest spirits, and didn’t think to glance in my direction until we were almost back to the bank of lifts. Once he did the whistling cut off abruptly, and he stopped to put a hasty arm around me. I wasn’t crying any longer, but if I looked the way I felt my face must have been absolutely ghastly.

“Now, now, none of that,” he said in the softest of voices, for an instant giving me the crazy impression it was Gerdoh who was speaking. “I know what’s bothering you, but you can’t let it. You have to accept it the way we agreed you would, or at least wait until we can discuss it in private. Do you hear me and understand what I’m saying?”

There wasn’t much for me to do besides nod, which didn’t in any way change anything. Despite all the open spaces in that part of the complex, I could feel the walls closing in from all sides. My body was burning, the arm Kel-Ten had around my shoulders making it considerably worse, and I finally understood to the very core of me that when it came time for him to see to his newest assignment, I’d have no choice about accepting it. I’d find it necessary to pull him to me rather than push him away, and then it would be irrevocably done.

“I’ll bet one of your problems is that you’re hungry,” Kel-Ten said with a smile after seeing my nod, his free hand smoothing my hair as he began leading me forward again. “It’s been hours since breakfast, and as soon as we get some food in you, you’ll be right back to snapping at me again. Come on, it’s not much farther.”

At least he was right about that. The doors to the dining room were only a short way beyond the lift area, and they opened into a much fancier dining room than the first one I’d been taken to. Crystal and silver sparkled among gracefully beautiful flowers, but here, too, the opulence went from high to higher. We made our way past tables filled with males and females together, lovely music keeping step with us, until we reached the very center of the room. There was a single, smaller table there, the decorations golden rather than silver, and the only ones to sit at it were we two.

“You’d laugh if I told you how many of my distinguished peers tried angling for an invitation to join us for lunch,” Kel-Ten said as he deposited me in a chair then took the one next to it himself. “They all wish they’d gotten to you first, the ones who are real men, I mean. For a little while I was thinking about using one of the high tables in the low dining room instead of coming here, but I changed my mind. I certainly don’t belong there, and now you don’t either.”

He leaned over me with a good deal of satisfaction and pressed my fingers to the print-plate in the table, then called up a menu for himself. The dial for the table’s chef was disguised amid all the glitter and sparkle, but he had no trouble finding it and using it once he’d made his selection. By then my own meal was being delivered, and I couldn’t stop the surge of fury that rose in me over the continuing fact that he ate what he pleased while I ate what was given me. I hated it, all of it, especially when I felt a sharp twist of hunger I should have been too out of sorts to feel. I knew at once I was being manipulated again, either by something that had been added to my breakfast or by something in that injection, and it was all I could do to keep from jumping up and running out of there. If there hadn’t been a promise of escape . . .

But, as slim as it was, there was a promise of escape. Kel-Ten chattered away while I ate mechanically and silently, finding nothing of any interest in the meal. This time I’d been allowed a small cup of kimla to be drunk after I’d finished my glass of swed, and I took a small amount of grim satisfaction in ignoring it completely. I neither needed nor wanted their version of treats for the little child, the thrill of being allowed something normally reserved only for grown-ups. I was willing to bet they’d also approved a taste or two of wine for dinner, and was looking forward to refusing that as well.

As was to be expected, Kel-Ten’s meal lasted longer than mine. This time he didn’t offer me any of it, and when he’d discovered I wasn’t answering any of his conversation he’d stopped talking and spent his time simply watching me. By the time he was through I could see he was really amused, and the glare I sent him only added to his fun. I’d been uncomfortable while I’d been eating, but once the food was gone there was nothing to distract me from the results of the injection I’d been given. I’d thought the shot from the day before had been bad, but right then I was learning the true meaning of bad.

Everything touching me was sending flashes of heat through my body, even the brocade of the chair against the bare part of my thighs, the brush of the tablecloth against my leg, the very movement of the air around me. My breathing was ragged and I couldn’t sit still no matter how hard I tried, and the music playing was more sensually suggestive than anything I’d ever heard. By rights I should have been in pain, but pain would have been too distracting so I felt nothing like that. Only desire and need, desire and need, over and over and only just short of whispering in my ear. I swallowed hard as I fought to hold it down, then grunted when Kel-Ten reached over to tug at my ear.

“You look like you could use a little dessert,” he remarked, the laughter heavy behind his voice. “Why don’t you come over and sit in Kel-Ten’s lap, and tell him what you’d like in the way of dessert?”

“I’d like to see you drop dead for dessert,” I whispered, keeping my eyes away from him. “Could you arrange that, please?”

“See, I knew a little food would put you back in better spirits,” he said, this time laughing out loud. “You’re going to have to say please, you know, so why don’t you say it now and get it over with? If you don’t, you’ll find yourself sitting and watching me do it to somebody else. Do you think you’ll be able to stand that, watching me take another woman in my arms, kissing her as I put her to her back, entering her . . . ”

“Stop,” I moaned, closing my eyes in a useless effort to block out the picture he was deliberately painting for me, my hands clamped tight to the arms of the chair. “Stop that, Kel-Ten, it isn’t fair! You don’t know what you’re doing to me!”

“Of course I know,” he said with a chuckle, and then his fingers were stroking the back of my hand closest to him. “I’m teaching you that if you want what you need, you have to be a good little girl and ask me the way I prefer being asked. Even if I did pick you out of the rest of the herd, my services aren’t automatically yours for the wanting. And you’d better understand that if you pass on it now, your next earliest opportunity will be very late this afternoon. Do you have any idea what you’ll be feeling like by then?”

The shivering darting through me from the mere touch of his fingers to my hand, told me exactly what I’d be feeling like by late afternoon. I’d be ready to crawl to him and kiss his feet and beg for his favors, mindless from the terrible, burning need consuming me. Waiting would only make everything that much worse, as though it weren’t already bad enough. Bad. Again. Just like everything I touched that also touched me.

“Please, Kel-Ten,” I whispered, my eyes still closed and my hands wrapped tight around what they held to. “You want me to say please, so I am saying it. Please take me somewhere and make this stop.”

“Why, that was very nicely said, sweet thing,” he answered, and I could see his grin even without seeing it. “I think you’re learning to appreciate Kel-Ten. Well, you did what I asked you to do, so you’ll get what you asked for. As soon as I finish one more cup of kimla. ”

I just sat there in the chair after that, hearing the music and the sound of voices all around, seeing nothing in the darkness behind my eyelids. I felt no surprise that he was making me wait even longer after I’d done as he’d demanded, it was something some part of me had apparently been expecting. I couldn’t sit still in the chair or let go of the chair arms, couldn’t breathe normally or stop feeling what was rapidly overcoming the ban against pain, but the one thing I didn’t feel was surprise. And all I could do about it was sit there and wait.

It takes forever for a cup of kimla to cool enough for you to drink it, two forevers for you to be led by the hand through a room full of people, some of whom start conversations with the one leading you. The trip from a dining room, up a lift, and over to an apartment is five forevers in duration, but walking through that apartment to the bedroom is only three forevers long. I made the last part of the journey carried in Kel-Ten’s arms, and when he put me down on the bed he was breathing almost as hard as I was, but not from exertion.

“I don’t know what it is about you,” he panted, already thrusting the shirt up to my armpits as I lay on my back in the middle of the bed. “I can have any woman in this complex and have had most of them, but ever since I first saw you you’ve become the one I most want to do it to. Say please again, and tell me you want it.”

“Please, Kel-Ten, please, please, please,” I moaned, wrapping my arms around his neck and trying to pull him to me. I barely knew what I was saying or doing, and when I pressed my lips hungrily to his, he forgot about everything but what wed come there for.

It was quite some time before it was over, quite some time before our minds could think again rather than simply feel. I lay curled up on the wrinkled bed that had been neatly made up when wed gotten there, trying to memorize the sensation of bodily satisfaction. Without knowing how long it was going to last, I didn’t want to chance taking it for granted and then finding it gone before it could be appreciated. Kel-Ten stirred where he lay beside me, and then he lifted a strand of my hair.

“I think you just had a harder workout than I had in exercise class, sweet thing,” he drawled, heavy satisfaction in the words. “I’ll have to send you off to your own exercise class in a few days or they’ll start to scream, but for now you’ll make do with being ridden. You can’t deny you enjoyed the ride, but I’m not enjoying all that sweat it left you covered with. Looks like it’s time you got a bath. ”

The thought of a bath should have made me feel considerably better, but as I was forced to sit up and follow Kel-Ten by the strand of hair he still held, all I felt was that useless anger rising again. The man wanted his pet bathed so his pet would be bathed, and no one in that entire complex would stop to wonder what the pet wanted. I kept getting the idea I’d been through something like that before, that what I wanted hadn’t even been considered by the people around me. The hatred and bitterness and frustration were all so familiar, as though I’d lived with them for quite a long time, and Kel-Ten seemed to suit it all especially well. Big and blond and blue-eyed felt terribly right, a figure that brought pain, a sight to stir that hatred and bitterness and frustration. I’d felt odd the first time I’d looked at him, but now I was beginning to know what the oddness had meant.

I was taken to the overdone gold bathroom, made to stand quietly while my bath was dialed, then was ordered into the water. Kel-Ten sat himself in the dry-chair with an “Ahh” of appreciation for the cooler air, but his grinning stare never left me. He knew I hated what was being done to me, and that seemed to make it all the better for him. The water was perfumed again, and when I leaned back into the headrest to let my hair be washed, so was the shampoo. I wasted no time soaking and trying to enjoy something absolutely devoid of enjoyment, and when I stepped out to wrap the towel around me, KelTen gestured me to him.

“Now you can come over here and let Kel-Ten enjoy how clean you are,” he said, patting his still-naked lap. “You’ll be needing him again later, and if you aren’t a good little sweet thing you won’t be getting him as fast as you did this time.”

As fast as I did that time. It was all I could do to keep my lip from curling as I walked over to him, and his grin said he knew what I was prudently refraining from showing or commenting on. He pulled me onto his lap and settled me the way he had the first time, and then his arms were around me as he sniffed appreciatively.

“Wildflowers,” he said with a good deal of enjoyment. “I love the smell of wildflowers.” He moved his face to the side of my neck, as though getting closer to enjoy the perfume more, but instead said very softly, “Why did they give you that heavy a shot? Did they tell you anything more than they told me? Try to conceal the movement of your lips when you answer me.”

“They said it was because of the way I acted with Ank-Soh,” I answered after pretending I was burying my face his chest, partially startled by having forgotten that that chair was where we supposedly could speak freely. “They knew he hadn’t minded, but they didn’t feel the same way about it. If I make sure I don’t refuse to be touched again, they’ll be gracious and not do that to me again. But why are we hiding the movement of our lips? I thought it was safe to talk here.”

“Soundwise, I’m sure it is safe,” he replied, moving his face around in my headrest-dried hair. “If they knew what we were discussing last night you’d be back in low having your personality Xed out, and I’d be-having problems of my own. Since I don’t know whether we’re being watched as well as listened to, I decided not to give them any more distorted conversations to wonder about. Everything is going much too well for me to chance ruining it now.”

I let my face rest against his chest just in case he was right about our being watched, but this time said nothing because there was nothing I cared to say. He picked up on my silence faster than I’d expected him to do, and his right hand reached across to move the towel off my left shoulder.

“It may not seem like it to you, but things are going unbelievably well,” he murmured, rubbing the top of my arm gently with his palm. “Not only did they give you to me without any of the argument I was expecting, they made it even better by coming up with a reason for me to keep you longer than I thought I could. I’ve decided not to waste any part of the opportunity, so tomorrow morning I’m going to awaken you.”

“Tomorrow morning,” I breathed, feeling a jolt of excitement coursing through me, almost forgetting to bury the words against him. “But why not today, right now, this very minute?”

“Not before you’ve visited my afternoon training classes, he demurred, his hand sliding down my back under the towel. “I have to get everyone used to seeing you, and knowing they can’t reach through to you. You’ll have to make sure you stand well back out of everyone’s range, as though you’re afraid they’ll hurt you, and that way no one will be able to tell you’re awake when you are awake. While you’re pretending to be frightened you’ll be paying very close attention to the exercises and instructions, getting yourself taught without my having to take the chance of doing it. Afterward I’ll help you practice, and I’d like to see them detect that. ”

I only just kept myself from making a sound of amusement, knowing as well as he that no one had equipment capable of detecting the use of emotions. Our escape was about to start, would be starting the very next day, and after that it would only be a matter of- A matter of allowing myself to be-to be- The elation drained out of me as I became very aware of the hand moving on my body, a hand that touched me as though I belonged to its owner. And I would belong to its owner, more completely than I’d ever belonged to anyone, and he knew that, and had begun heating me up again to prove it . . . .

“Don’t worry, sweet thing, by the time it happens you won’t even notice,” he murmured, obviously knowing where my thoughts had gone. “In a little while you’ll understand that it’ll be my baby in your pretty belly, and you’ll be as hot at the idea as I am. I want to do you, girl, more than I ever wanted to do any other female, and I mean to see you wanting it just as much. Use that squirming to shift around to face me, and then give your Kel-Ten a big kiss. If they’re watching, we’re about to give them something interesting to look at.”

He held my towel while I did as he’d told me to, miserable but having no choice about listening to him. I could almost hear the bubbling in my blood starting up again, and had no illusions about what it would be like for me if I tried refusing. He let the towel fall on his knees behind me as I raised my face to him, and once our lips met his hand made sure we met in another way as well. I moaned deep in my throat and hated myself for it, feeling that it was somehow my fault I couldn’t stop what that drug was making me do and feel. It had me so tight that when Kel-Ten didn’t shift closer to me, I whimpered and went to him. He chuckled and used his thumb to encourage me in my efforts even more, but just before I lost myself to wildness I was able to whisper deep inside, “Tomorrow morning . . . tomorrow morning . . . tomorrow morning . . . ”