The Will of the Gods

3 A gift is returned—and a journey begun

All was silent when I awoke, yet did it seem as though the air carried memory of the presence of many males—and warriors as well. At first I recalled naught of what had occurred; I knew only I was hungry and my body felt slick and unclean, my hair hanging again in greasy strands, yet was there a strength and well-being within me which squared my shoulders and allowed me to hold my head high. I sat upon a fur in a room of stone, a half-spent torch casting enough light to look about in, a large, metal-bound wooden door shutting off sight of what lay beyond. A sudden aroma came to me which caused me to twist toward a wooden board where stood an array of the provender which I had such a great need of. Nilno and paslat and fellin tubers there were, dark baked grain and a large metal goblet from which the aroma of falar came; though it seemed to have stood there some short time I reached for the first of it with pleasure, and at sight of the cloth wrapped about my hand, memory returned of what had gone before.

For a single brief moment I sat unmoving, and then did I look down between my breasts to see that which I already knew was there. My life sign, the crystal hadat with roiling black within, hung upon its leather as though it had ever been upon me, as though it had not been taken in anger by Mida. Slowly, though there was no longer a reason for caution, I took the wrapped cloth from first my right hand and then my left, seeing the faint lines of healing where so recently had been gaping wounds, feeling naught save strength and steadiness in my grip. The sole cause of unsteadiness I felt stemmed from the vast clouds of confusion surrounding me, for never had I thought to see my life sign again. Had Mida relented in her anger and therefore returned the life sign as she had taken it? Had she felt approval for my actions, rather than condemnation as I had at first believed? Was the pain I had been given no more than that which a warrior might expect at the hands of males, rather than the punishment I had thought it to be? I knew not what the goddess was about, yet did I know that I had again been healed; clearly, in future, it would be necessary to recall that the final stroke of a battle was not necessarily that which was clear to the eye.

The provender which awaited me was also unexplained, yet was I able to feed upon it without such explanation. Much of it had gone comfortably down my throat to fill the hollow within, the falar slowly and smoothly following, when the great door opened to admit Mehrayn. He halted briefly, his eyes touched me, with a look of satisfaction, and then he closed the door and approached the place where I sat.

“Though the doing of it was this time longer, you are again healed,” said he, halting before the fur so that he might bend and seat himself upon it. “And you have eaten the food left for you.”

“Indeed,” said I, sipping at the falar as I considered the strangeness which held the male. Much did it seem as though he hid annoyance, yet for what reason I knew not. “You are already aware, then, of the return of my life sign, therefore was it you who provided provender. I had wondered upon the reason for its presence.”

“Indeed,” said he, almost as though he mocked me, his eyes continuing to hold mine. “You wondered upon the reason for the presence of the food, yet not upon the reason for the presence of your life sign. Perhaps you already know how it was returned?”

“Clearly has Mida relented in her anger toward me,” said I, understanding naught of the tone of the male. “As it was she who took the life sign, it was also she who returned it. What part of the fey is it outside these stone walls? How long was I made to sleep?”

“Darkness has but recently fallen without,” said he, keeping his eyes upon me. “You have slept the healing sleep since mid fey of the last fey, before that you lay in fever sleep since the darkness before last darkness. We discovered that the blades of the whips which touched you were coated with a resin which brings on delirium. If not properly counteracted, it eventually brings death as well. So it was your Mida who returned your life sign to you, was it? Just as she took it?”

“Of a certainty,” said I, even more confused at his continuing strangeness. “Why do you question me upon a point you know as well as I?”

“Perhaps one might say with even greater certainty that I am better acquainted with the point than you,” said he, reclining. “When the life sign was returned, you see, I was not in the midst of the sleep of delirium.”

“You beheld Mida?” I asked, startled to a large degree. “Never before has she appeared to a male, save that that male was already . . . ”

“It was not Mida,” said he, his tone so flat that my words immediately died. Indeed, the male seemed to grow more and more angry and annoyed with each passing hand of reckid. “The one who returned your life sign was Aysayn, who rode after us as quickly as he discovered who had stolen it. And before you ask, that one was also not your Mida.”

“I do not understand.” I stumbled, confusion growing so great that it nearly overwhelmed me. “Who other than Mida would have dared . . .”

“Ladayna dared,” said he, quickly taking the goblet of falar which I had nearly spilled through having forgotten that I held it. “The wench slipped into my chamber while we slept, having left Aysayn’s side in my guest chamber where he slept. Through accident did Aysayn discover it in her possession, and then did the wench dare to insist that she had taken it to keep you from riding off alone as you intended. She was attempting to assist Aysayn and myself, said she, and yet she did not come forward with the life sign once you had left without it. She professed fear of accusation of having taken your protection once you were gone, yet do I recall that she took the sign once before, having found a great attraction in it. Aysayn beat her till her speech was nearly incoherent with pain, yet did she continue to maintain that she had not stolen for her own benefit.”

I stretched my legs out upon the golden lenga fur and leaned down to one elbow, stunned at the tale Mehrayn had told. Ladayna! She it was who had twice condemned me to slavery, each time to protect the schemings she had contrived against Aysayn, he who was called Sigurr’s Shadow upon this world. When I regained my freedom it had been my intention to take her life, yet had I been felled by the wound I had received in the battle fought shortly before; upon awakening I found I had been given my task by Mida, therefore had such petty thoughts been put aside. Perhaps it would have been best to complete that which had been nearly begun; to leave a living enemy behind is to offer one’s back to that enemy’s blade.

“So much for the term ‘sister’ used by her,” I said at last, recalling the words the female had last addressed to me. “Surely was it her departure from your chamber which awakened me during that darkness, and surely would I have awakened the sooner had I not swallowed so great an amount of falar. Once again has it been proven that a warrior must be cautious when taking drink among males.”

“And this is the sole conclusion you have come to?” asked Mehrayn, drawing my eyes back to him.

Though the torch sat upon the wall above and somewhat behind him, the eyes of the male fairly glowed with whatever emotion flared through him. “A warrior must be cautious of the company she keeps? No word upon the foolishness of wenches who see themselves as of vast importance? No word of apology to those who have been badly used by those selfsame wenches?”

“I know of none who have been badly used,” said I, again confused. “Nor do I see my actions as foolish. As Mida commands so must it be, with none to deny her. No more have I done than attempt to obey.”

“You obey neither mortal nor god,” said he with a soft sound of disdain. “Your actions stem from no more than your own interpretation of events, an interpretation which is more often incorrect than true. You defy and deny those about you in the name of Mida, when the true source quoted should be Jalav the stubborn.”

“What male foolishness do you speak?” I demanded, immediately bristling with insult as I sat straight upon the lenga pelt. “Was it I who directed that Bellinard be taken by the Midanna, that I ride to raise the Sigurri, that I claim the leadership of the enemy Midanna? Had the decision been mine, my Midanna alone would have sufficed to meet the strangers. Have the Sigurri thought better of riding to battle that you now insult me?”

“You know well enough that the Sigurri shall ride as Sigurr demands,” said he, his tone calm yet implacable. “I shall not be distracted into argument upon a point other than that which we discuss. When your life sign was found to be gone from that place where it had been left, I asked that you delay your departure till a thorough search had been instituted. One of proper and mature reason would surely have agreed, yet Jalav the gando knew the true meaning behind the disappearance: Mida the goddess had fallen to anger, and Jalav’s punishment was that she be bereft of protection. Immediately did the she-gando take her leave, without even so much as a final word to those who had come to care for her.”

My lips parted to berate the male for the tone he dared to take with me, yet he quickly sat himself straight and continued before my words were able to come forth.

“Much did I heap curses upon my own head for having kept you so long from your task that terrible punishment was given you,” said he, sharp anger now evident in face and voice. “Clearly was it my insistence upon accompanying you and the—‘dallying’ I had lured you with that had brought disaster upon you, for so had you maintained and so did it truly seem. When Chaldrin returned with word of the new direction you had taken I rode out immediately, ill with the thought that further punishment was to be added to that which had already been given you. We crept within this cavern, seeking to surround the enemy whose numbers were greater than ours, yet before the encirclement was complete the whips were used on you. Again I reviled myself, believing the ills which befell you continued to be caused by me, thinking you had spoken truly when you insisted that my presence would bring naught save grief. We slew our enemies and bound your wounds, then stood about and watched as delirium slowly sapped the life from you. We were helpless, unable to aid against the resin, for we knew not what the counteragent might be—and then your life sign was brought by Aysayn. The life sign you would already have worn had you waited another fey or two.”

His green eyes held to me with an unsettling directness, a voiceless command that his words were to be taken as truth. Indeed was I greatly dismayed at his view of the happenings, yet was it clear that he saw only through the eyes of anger.

“You are a male, and therefore unfamiliar with the doings of Mida and unable to comprehend the true meaning of things,” said I, attempting to free my tone of insult and merely to teach. “At first did I, too, see Ladayna at fault, yet must it be remembered that Mida may use any to see her will done, even a city slave-woman or males. Ladayna’s doing was clearly at the behest of Mida, the return of my life sign by Aysayn as clearly the same. Had I found the final darkness I would no longer have been able to ride in her cause, therefore did the goddess see to my survival. Chaldrin was allowed to follow and bring others, for I rode in a direction other than that from which they have been barred. It was indeed Mida’s intention to see me punished, yet was it not her intention to see me ended. She continues to feel annoyance with her warrior, yet are there tasks which must be accomplished.”

Again I stretched upon the lenga pelt and rested upon my left elbow, the now-healed fingers of my hand toying with the long, silky hair of the fur. I did not know whether or not Mida approved of my most recent doings, but I continued to feel that she did not. The males might well have been allowed to arrive soon enough to keep the metal-tipped fighting whips from my flesh, yet they had not. The word sent to me may well have been a warning to heed the command I had been given, else might my life sign also be kept from arriving should the occasion again arise. Under such a circumstance would my soul then be forfeit; however I still was not eager to obey. Instead I felt a faint curiosity, centering on a newly formed query: in what manner would the goddess act if I were to fling my life sign into a swiftly running stream and then open my own throat with a dagger? Would even the magic of the goddess be sufficient to keep the life from flowing swiftly from me? I had once been healed by her without the presence of the crystal life sign, yet had the process been long and filled with the frustrations of helplessness; if it were her intention to see me healed again, would this longer process be used, or would the life sign somehow be retrieved yet again? Faintly did it seem that the goddess challenged me rather than commanded yet the notion could be nothing more than empty-headed fancy.

“Ah, now do I understand all which has occurred,” said Mehrayn, a false heartiness to his voice to match his strangely pleasant smile. “It was not the stubbornness of your single-minded viewpoint which sent you forth without the protection of the gods, it was no less than the will of those very same gods. Punishment has been decreed for you by cause of your actions, yet are you not to be ended, for your continuing efforts have also been demanded. No other than you is capable of free will, for all save you move to the demands of the gods. You alone move to your own urgings, obeying or disobeying the gods as you please, bringing about their will through efforts which no other is capable of performing. For such a reason is it you alone who is punished, when disobedience comes in place of obedience; no other may be held culpable, for all others move to the will of the gods.”

I blinked in uncertainty at the words of the male, yet did it seem that, although strangely put, he had at last found the right of it. The reason behind so odd a circumstance was far beyond the vision of even a Midanna war leader, yet had the male done well in describing the circumstance itself. Again I parted my lips, this time to commend the male, yet was he in the midst of opening and removing his swordbelt, the overly pleasant smile he had worn now nearly a grin. I had no understanding of what brought him such amusement and lightheartedness, and surely did he see the words I had not yet put breath to.

“Your dark, lovely eyes are filled with question,” said he, putting sword and scabbard well behind him. “Should you wonder at my feelings of pleasure, you need wonder no longer. I am pleased that I may now accompany you as I wish, for my presence will be in accordance with the will of the gods. Lacking free will of my own, my actions may be considered no other thing.”

“You cannot!” I protested, so taken aback by his intention that I began to straighten to sitting again. “I must be on my way from here in as few reckid as possible, therefore . . . ”

“No,” said he, his voice soft, his movement so swift that he knelt across me before I was able to rise to sitting. “As the gods direct my actions, my will may be looked upon as the will of the gods. It is my will that you remain here through the darkness, therefore shall you obey the gods and remain.”

“You do not speak with the voice of the gods!” I hissed, glaring up at his broad form in anger. “Merely are you used at times to see the will of the gods done! You, yourself, are no part of it! Remove your bulk from before me this moment, for I must quickly depart!”

“Else shall I be struck down by the gods?” he inquired pleasantly, putting his great hands to my life sign and the leather which held it. “Surely do you seem to have forgotten that the gods are angered and have decreed punishment for you. What harsher punishment than to keep you in a place you wish to be gone from? What better way to punish disobedience than through forced obedience? You shall, I will wager, recall this punishment longer than many others you have been given, perhaps even unto a fair consideration in future of those about you who are other than Midanna.”

His hands then lifted the life sign from about my neck, showing that the leather had not been settled beneath my hair. The anger within me grew to fury, for the male clearly believed not a word he spoke, his intent no more than to mock me and take that which was not freely given. I had not the time to dally with males, and surely would Mida see me truly punished if I again failed to ride as she had directed. Personal punishment might be borne in silence, yet what if the punishment should descend instead upon the Hosta or those other Midanna who followed me? That was how the gods punished, bringing agony to one’s very soul, though this male above me did not know that. He moved in the cause of none save his own, his anger toward one who was chained to the gods more than foolish.

In fury, then, did I rise up and strike at the broad body of the male with both fists, attempting to force him from me, yet no more than a grin did I elicit with my efforts. Much did it seem as though I struck at the stone of the walls, Mehrayn’s body warmer yet surely no softer. Again and again I struck at him, furious to see naught save that accursed grin, and then did he begin to bend slowly down to me, his well-muscled arms reaching to the lenga fur to either side of me. I quickly put my hands to his shoulders to thrust him from me, yet sooner would I have been able to thrust away the fangs of the attacking lenga from my flesh. Down and down he came, forcing me flat to the furs with the weight of his body alone, my arms bending slowly yet surely between us, and then his face was no more than a breath from mine.

“I give eternal thanks to Sigurr that you have been restored to full health, stubborn she-gando,” he murmured, the green of his eyes now steady with sobriety. “Had you been taken from my arms to his, surely would I soon have followed you. I know now that I mean naught to you, for I am male and Sigurri rather than Midanna, yet do you remain all that holds meaning for me. Best you learn to care for yourself, for the pain which takes you takes me as well, and I care little for such added pain.”

Then were his lips upon mine, warm and demanding, and I awash in limitless confusion. Though I had attempted to free myself of him, my desire for his lips and arms and body was so great that I felt I would burst with it. Merely to share the touch of his lips, my hands to the broadness of his shoulders. Mida! What enchantment the male had placed upon me I knew not, yet was I powerless to resist it. In the feyd we had been apart I had yearned for him endlessly, and he spoke of meaning naught to me. And yet, how was I to acknowledge what meaning he did hold for me, when the gods punished as they did? The warmth of his body came to mine as his tongue tasted me deeply, a tasting I could barely keep from sharing. Mida demanded that I ride at once, yet this male kept me from it; should she somehow gain the agreement of Sigurr, indeed might Mehrayn be struck down! I moved in protest beneath his body and lips, torn with the need for him, torn with the need to be away, unable to know more than a portion of the frenzied thoughts racing about in my head. If for no other reason, I must depart to protect the male, yet his arms moved beneath me and held me tight to his chest.

“I shall not allow you to squirm free of me, wench,” he said with soft laughter, his right fist tangling in my hair. “There is punishment yet to come to you—as soon as I am done with giving thanks to Sigurr.”

Again did his lips come to me, this time with greater strength, and no longer was I able to consider protection.

The coming light of the new fey was not evident within the crowding dimness of the large cavern where Nobain and many of his males had been slain, yet was the presence of so many newly awakened folk ample evidence of its nearness. Provender had already been prepared and offered to those who had desire for it, and Mehrayn’s males sat about and fed slowly, attempting to chase the mists of sleep from their eyes. It came as no surprise that it was the town female and two Sigurri females who had been chosen to prepare the provender; what surprise there was came from the manner in which they looked upon me when I stood before them. Their haughty up-and-down appraisal attempted to dismiss my presence, it faltering only when I straightened to my full height and rested left hand upon sword hilt. Foul was the humor of Jalav that fey, and fortunate were the females for seeing this so quickly. I had no desire for the provender they had prepared, yet had I a great need of it; had I found it necessary to demand that provender, their haughtiness would have been keenly regretted.

With hastily given paslat and dark baked grain and falar, I took myself to a solitary corner of the cavern and sat, giving no note to the coolness of the stone. Soon enough would the heat of the forests bring the slickness of sweat to my flesh, and quickly would the cool of the cavern be no more than faint memory. I would depart as soon as I had filled the Mida-sent hollow within me, that hunger whichever came in the wake of the crystal’s healing. Had I not had the hollow to contend with, I would surely have already been upon the trail.

“It pleases me to see you hale and strong again, wench,” came a familiar voice. Chaldrin stood above me, partially shadowed, the steps of his approach so silent that they had not intruded upon my thoughts. I sank my teeth into the flesh of the paslat, tearing out a great chunk upon which to chew, giving the male no least sign of recognition. I had no desire for the company of any male, and wished the fact to be made plain to Chaldrin, yet was he male and unconcerned over remaining where he was unwanted. A deep silence descended when I spoke no word, and then was Chaldrin crouching beside me.

“Do you mean to hold all men culpable for what was done to you by the Sword?” he asked, his tone held low so that it might reach my ears alone. “All men are no more responsible for the doings of one, than all wenches are to be taken to task for the doings of one of theirs. Mehrayn was filled with great fury when the Shadow appeared bearing your life sign, and deeply did he vow to see you punished for thoughtless foolishness. Was he overly harsh with you?”

I tore again at the paslat flesh with my teeth, near to a growl at thought of Mehrayn’s doings of the darkness. My hunger for him had been no less than his for me, and fully did we merge for an endless time, feeling more than simple pleasure of the flesh. Truly did I wish to weep as a city slave-woman would when he withdrew from me, for I knew I was bound to leave him behind once again and continue on the path demanded of me by Mida. I took his broad face in my hands, pressing my lips to his a final time, rose to sitting to seek out my breech, and then he had—

“Should that male approach me again, I shall have his life,” I snarled low, reaching for the falar I had had the city females pour for me. “Mida take me if I fail to do so.”

“And I have sworn to stand with you,” said Chaldrin with a deep sigh, hanging his forearms upon his broad thighs. “A pity the Sword will not hold his stroke against me as he shall with you. Perhaps your Mida will find a place for me as you do not.”

“Should he hold his stroke with me, he will not retain life long enough to face another,” I informed Chaldrin. averting my eyes as I replaced the falar after one swallow and returned to the paslat. “Perhaps in future, however, you would be wise to consider carefully before giving your oath to stand beside another.”

“You are undoubtedly correct,” said the male with his deep-voiced chuckle. “I am, however, still in the midst of the first oath, which shall also undoubtedly continue to hold my attention for some time. Do you mean to say you would strike at one who would not defend himself from you? That you would take his life though yours was not in jeopardy? I had not thought the coward’s stroke to be among those you would use.”

Again I growled low in my throat, this time sending a venom-filled glare toward the male, yet his dark eyes refused to look away from mine. Though I enjoyed the thought of facing Mehrayn with blades, indeed would I feel the coward striking at one who had vowed to raise no weapon against me. My sword and dagger had I found immediately without the room I had passed the darkness in, yet had I not returned to sink a blade deep in the sleeping body of he who was Sigurr’s Sword. Though the male had earned that and more, honor forbade that I do him so.

“And yet the coward’s stroke is not beyond others,” said I, tearing at the paslat as my eyes held Chaldrin’s. “The strength of a male is greater than that of a warrior, much as though I were armed and he was not, yet his stroke was not withheld. For what reason, then, should I withhold the stroke of my blade?”

“For the reason that his stroke might have been avoided, had you taken the trouble to learn what I had offered to teach you,” replied the dark male, his tone unrelenting. “Perhaps your efforts would still have come to naught, for the Sword is not unskilled in this manner of battle, yet would you have found yourself able to strike a blow or two which would not have gone unfelt. Would there not have been satisfaction in knowing that even in defeat you had given nearly as well as you had received?”

The question the male posed hung between us, for I would have given much to have been able to strike a telling blow against Mehrayn. So large was that male, and so strongly made—was it truly possible Chaldrin spoke without deceit? I took my eyes from the male of the Caverns and put aside the paslat bones, then took up the dark baked grain. Had it not been necessary that I depart immediately upon Mida’s work . . .

“Jalav.” The softly spoken word was in a voice other than that of Chaldrin, higher and considerably more hesitant. I raised my eyes to see Ilvin to my right, astand as though she were a warrior-to-be and I a Keeper’s Attendant who had cause to be cross with her. Indeed was I the war leader of her war leader, and indeed had I cause to be cross with her.

“So, Ilvin, you felt the need to take a short ride through the forests, I see,” said I, staring up at a warrior who stood with head down and light eyes elsewhere. “Perhaps I have attained greater age than I had thought; surely do I recall having commanded you to remain with your sisters. This, however, cannot be, for what warrior would disobey her war leader?”

“Jalav, I meant no disobedience!” she begged, light eyes now beseechingly upon me. “Those males gave no respect to the greatest warrior among us, and deeply did I feel that they would cause you harm! I followed after so that I might be at hand should you require one to stand beside you, yet did I take care to stand well away from Mida’s work! Had I known my capture would draw you from the return path to those who wait, surely would I have first taken my own life and stood in dishonor before Mida.”

“For one who meant no disobedience, there was disobedience aplenty,” said I, taking the baked grain and the falar and rising to my feet. Ilvin continued to look upon me with great anxiety, knowing the duty one owed to a war leader, knowing a war leader’s word was ignored at a warrior’s peril. The reason she had disobeyed was insufficient, for she had chosen her own estimation of the situation over mine—and then had been proven in error. At such a point one must either challenge the war leader in order to join Mida with weapon honorably in hand, else must the erring warrior accept punishment sternly given. “When I have returned to Bellinard,” said I, “I shall expect to hear from your war leader what punishment was given you—and how well you accepted it.”

“I shall accept it gladly, Jalav,” said she, happily eager, and then did the eyes which looked upward toward me widen with sudden distress. “When have you returned?” she echoed, truly hearing the words I had spoken. “You cannot mean to remain longer among these males?”

“You, warrior, have only to consider your own path!” I returned with some sharpness, my annoyance growing greater at the tone Ilvin had used. Surely did it seem that the Hitta warrior was again prepared for disobedience, a thing I would not again allow. “Where your war leader rides is a matter to be considered only by her and Mida.”

“And me,” said Chaldrin, who now stood behind my left shoulder. “Where you ride, wench, there is where I shall be, prepared to stand or fall with you. Not again shall I be left behind.”

“A male, to stand with the war leader?” demanded Ilvin in outrage as I began to turn to Chaldrin to rebuke him. “Where stands Jalav, there stands Ilvin, for whom no male has yet proven a match!”

“You have been commanded to return to your own, girl,” grumbled Chaldrin with calm as I turned again toward Ilvin. “Best you obey and leave swordwork for those possessing skill.”

“For a male to speak of skill is like unto a sednet speaking of flight,” returned Ilvin disdainfully. She stood before Chaldrin with head high and left hand resting upon sword hilt, taking no note of the manner in which he folded his arms across his chest, hiding sight of his leather-wrapped wrists. “Should the war leader require one to stand with her,” said Ilvin, “she will require more than the presence of a male. Should she require none to stand with her, then would the presence of a male be fitting.”

Chaldrin seemed greatly annoyed, but I did not want to remain and hear what his reply to Ilvin would be. I thought that two difficulties might easily be left to see to one another, therefore did I step within the cavern shadows as a prelude to departing without. the notice of all those who so fervently wished to ride with me. Perhaps Mida knew how all those offering assistance might be easily avoided, yet I did not.

“Hosta war leader.” The words, softly spoken, came from the shadows I had entered, and then was the dark-haired Summa warrior before me, her light-haired sister at her right shoulder. “It pleased us to find it Mida’s will that we escape the capture of those males,” said the dark-haired Summa, her eyes continuing to rest upon me. “I am Wedin, and my sister is Dotil. We have no need to be told that you are Jalav, war leader of the Hosta, for we know you. We had not known, however, that you had become war leader to all of your clans, for never before has such a happening occurred. Our clans were taken with great surprise when it was discovered that all of our enemy sisters had left their lands, and we would know where they have gone. It was you, as war leader, who led them from their home tents, was it not?”

“Not precisely,” said I, feeling a sigh take me. I had not known it was to begin so quickly, yet must there always, in every undertaking, be a beginning. “Our clans of the Midanna were led to the lands of males by Relis, our Keeper, who was directed by Mida in a dream. I, who was elsewhere, was sent by Mida to join them, and then did I become war leader of all of the clans. With all of our warriors fighting as a single clan, we were able to take and hold a city of males.”

“You took a city?” asked Dotil, she of the light hair, her voice and face filled with delight. “Ah, Mida! Would that I had been there! The battle must truly have been glorious!”

“I see a thing more glorious still,” said Wedin, her dark eyes soberly upon me as I smiled at the words of Dotil. “It was Mida herself who commanded the attack against the males? Mida who speaks to your clans as she does not to ours? Are we, also, to be sent as one clan against the males? Are we, also, to be spoken to?”

“Your clans have already been spoken to,” said I, attempting to soothe the anxiety of the Summa. “I am the chosen of the goddess and have been directed to go to your clans and summon them to the great battle which approaches. All Midanna warriors are to fight as sisters, and I—I am to lead you.”

“Mida preserve us all,” muttered Wedin with a sigh, both comments fitting companions to Dotil’s look of pain. “I mean no offense, Hosta, yet do I anticipate the response of my clan and our sister clans to the tidings that we are to follow a Hosta and call her war leader. Though Dotil and I are aware of the willing assistance given us by you, the others of our sisters were not bound beside us. They heard naught of the manner in which you called Hitta and Summa to battle, and will believe that you sought to aid the Hitta alone—or that you thought us Hitta as well. Wisest would be to see one of our own as leader to us.”

“I have been given little choice in the matter,” said I with a shrug, continuing to meet her concern-filled eyes. “It is I who has been named war leader of all Midanna, and so it must come to be. I shall visit each clan and each war leader and, with Mida’s aid, win each of them over. The first will surely be most difficult, and yet I will thereafter have a . . .”

“Jalav, it cannot be!” said Dotil, interrupting my words in sudden upset, her light eyes wide. “The visiting! It was nearly the time for the visiting when we fell to capture! Should we depart for Midanna lands upon the moment, it will surely be in the midst of the visiting when we arrive!”

Wedin voiced a groan of memory suddenly recalled, and I, too, felt a great urge to give sound to the pain of understanding. Once each kalod do the various clans come together to a place of meeting, to greet sisters long unseen, to speak of the various battles each has fought in since the last meeting, to greet and give congratulations to new war leaders and newly blooded warriors, to look upon what males now followed those who allowed it. Each clan was bound to bring two newly learned things to share with its sister clans, things such as battle strategies, and hunting techniques, and insights in gando-breaking and handling, and weapons usage. At much the same time of the kalod do our two groups meet, each upon lands of their own clans, a truce of sorts existing at that time. Neither seeks out the meeting place of the other, and had my sister clans not ridden to take a city of males, they too would have been in the midst of visiting among their own. The two Summa continued to look upon me in upset, yet no alternate choice was possible to me.

“There is naught for it save that I face all nine clans at once,” said I, drawing and releasing a long, deep breath. “Surely do I give thanks that Mida’s shield stands before me, and surely shall I give even greater thanks if it continues to remain so. It seems clear I shall have need of it.”

I raised my cup of falar to my lips and drank, finding that my mind already grappled with the problem I would face, and then another thought came to me. Much had I believed that my efforts in freeing Ilvin and the two Summa had caused anger in Mida, yet now it seemed more than likely that it was meant that I do so. Had I ridden on and left them to their capture, I would have found no single clan in its home tents, the locations of which I knew only a very few, nor would I have been able to easily discover the place of visiting. Much precious time would have been lost in search, easily more than that which had passed since I had left the city of the Sigurri. The lands of the Midanna are vast, and not easily searched through; with the Summa to guide me, however, the problem would no longer be of concern.

“Nine clans, you said,” remarked Wedin, clearly a warrior alert to all which went on about her. “You are aware, then, of the disappearance of the Silla. Their actions were exceedingly strange for some time, and then were they one fey gone from their home tents, no word left even with the Keeper’s Attendants who cared for their warriors-to-be. Have you knowledge of their fate?”

“Indeed I do,” said I, looking about me at the greater stirrings among the Sigurri males. Soon would they be prepared to do whatever it was that they meant to do, therefore would it be best if the Summa and I departed. I gestured toward the cavern opening, directly across the cavern floor rather than through the shadows, and said, “As we journey, I shall be pleased to inform you of the happenings which now concern your clans as well as ours. Best would be that we depart as quickly as possible.”

“Indeed,” agreed Wedin, looking about as I had, Dotil also aware of the stirring. “I find discomfort in the midst of so many males, despite their having offered us no indignity and no harm. Had our weapons not been returned to us, surely would we have awaited you in the forests to extend our thanks. I dislike the way these males look upon me.”

“And yet have they some of them proven worthy of a warrior’s attention,” said Dotil, showing a grin of amused satisfaction. “The three I approached were not unwilling to allow me to taste them, and far superior were they to those who took us in capture. One of the three was truly excellent, and I regret being unable to offer him the opportunity of following me.”

“I, too, have tasted a small number of them,” said Wedin with a shrug, “yet is it their sword skill which I find most amazing. With practice would many of them reach nearly to the level of a warrior, and never have I before seen such a thing. What manner of males are these?”

“They are called Sigurri,” said I, draining the cup of falar before tossing it from me. “Their swords will stand beside ours in the coming battle, for it is Mida’s will that it be so. This, too, shall you be told of upon the journey.”

I turned from their nods and began to make my way across the cavern, my stride quick and my heart eager to be free within the forests once again. There is little to compare with the glorious freedom of Mida’s forests, and I continued to find myself unable to comprehend the attraction found by males in shelters of all sorts. When they were without dwellings they sought caves, forever locking themselves away from—

My thoughts ceased abruptly as my foot came down upon that which was not stone, my stride sending me forward another full pace before surprise and curiosity halted me. The Summa, following behind, halted as well, questioning clear in their eyes as I turned and bent to that which lay upon the stone floor of the cavern. My fingers found a small leather pouch, the strings of which had been cleanly severed, and within—within was a good supply of small, coarse brown grains well mixed with some bits of yellow grains. I stood unmoving as I gazed within the sack, not comprehending, but growing excited nevertheless.

“A sack without a pipe,” said Wedin, some small interest in her tone. “Of what use is a sack without a pipe?”

“None,” said I, finally bestirring myself to draw the sack closed again and knot the severed strings to a tie of my breech. “This sack, however, was that which was cut from the belt of the male Gengan when Nobain slew him. By the male’s own words was he a Pathfinder, one whose spirit is released to walk free in the White Land when enveloped in the Clouds of Seeing. These grains will allow my spirit the same freedom—with none to halt me. Has either of you a pipe?”

“Not I,” said Wedin, Dotil agreeing with a shrug and a shake of her head. “What is this White Land you speak of, and what might be the Clouds of Seeing?”

“Our journey may prove of insufficient length to allow the telling of all I have learned in the service of Mida,” said I, considerably annoyed yet unable to alter matters. Clearly had I been set upon the trail of the males for a purpose other than simply freeing and following the Summa, for now the White Land was mine with Lialt unable to keep me from it as he had upon the first occasion. The brother of Ceralt was also a Pathfinder, the chief tracker of the White Lands for those of his village, a male who had feared my presence in a place where heretofore only he had gone. I recalled that the male Gengan had spoken of seeing Nobain’s death upon the Snows, yet had the male clearly been less skilled at reading the tracks of the White Land than Lialt. Red-haired Gengan had failed to see that his own death would occur first, Nobain’s coming only later at the hands of Mehrayn, who was also red-haired. It was perhaps possible that their signs were nearly the same upon the Snows. I would need to spend much time in the White Lands before I might claim familiarity with the place, yet at the end of that time would my skill far exceed that of Lialt. There was little a male might do that a warrior could not easily match and better, and as soon as I found the opportunity to make a pipe, I would begin my conquest of the White Land.

Again I turned toward the egress from the cavern which would lead to Mida’s sweet air, yet is there ever a balance struck between good fortune and ill. I had paused to speak with the Summa and to find the sack which would give me the White Lands, and the delays had been enough to allow the awakening and presence of the greatest thorn of my flesh. From my right came a large arm which reached past me to my left shoulder, and then did I find myself turned to face Mehrayn.

“I have not yet given you greeting for the new light, wench,” said he, gazing down into my eyes as he drew me close. “The taste of that which will break my fast is far inferior to the taste of your lips. First I shall have the superior, and the inferior.”

His lips lowered to mine, hungrily demanding as ever they were, yet was I filled full with the memory of the darkness. The nearness of the male was as naught to me, my body completely uncaring; in no more than a moment was the male aware of my lack of response, and then did his head raise once again.

“When my hands are upon you, my wits are ever elsewhere,” he muttered, annoyance clear in the green of his eyes. “Your life sign must first be removed before the softness and warmth again return to you, and this has not been done. Let us see to it quickly, and then we may—”

His words ended as his eyes sought my life sign in vain, his hand lifting to where it normally hung, halting as well. No more than my breasts did his seeking gaze find, and when his eyes returned to mine they at last perceived the coldness therein. I had no words for the male for my fury remained too high; I had no wish to speak except in challenge, and such speech was useless. The male would meet me if I pressed the matter, yet would he refuse to strike, just as Chaldrin had said. Honor forbade that I draw weapon against him for the matter between us was not a blood debt, yet was I perilously close to the wish that it was. All this was the male able to see in my eyes, and a deep sigh took him.

“I would know, O Sigurr, why all females must be cut from the same cloth,” said he, raising his eyes to the unseen roof of the cavern far above as he folded his arms across his chest. “Ever do they insist upon doing as they wish, yet when those doings earn them a punishment it is the man who punishes them whom they blame, rather than the doings they, themselves, have insisted upon. As a man is able to forgive their foolishness, so should they find it within themselves to forgive that man the doing of the necessary.”

The foolishness of the male was incredible, therefore did I turn and walk from him, again attempting to depart. I had no understanding of the nonsense he spoke, nor did I feel a wish to understand. I wished for no more than a great deal of distance between us, yet was my wish fated to be ignored.

“The while you ready kand for yourself and those other wenches,” Mehrayn called after me, “I shall gather up that which will break my fast upon the trail. I have no wish to cause further delay in our departure.”

“Our departure?” echoed Dotil from behind me, she seeing naught of the urge within me to bare my teeth. “Does the male follow you, Jalav? Surely you cannot mean to allow him to follow you to the visiting place?”

“The male seems one who obeys naught save his own desires,” remarked Wedin, who now strode along beside me, to my right. “Should he refuse to take himself from the midst of Midanna doings, you will, of course, speak to him with swords. ”

“I cannot,” I replied, vexation strong within me, too well aware of Wedin’s dark eyes upon me. “The male has aided me too often, returned my life and freedom too often, for me now to take his life. Also has he sworn that he will never raise weapon to me, for once I kept him from the claws and teeth of the keren. It must be through Mida’s efforts that he rides elsewhere than upon my track, and surely will she see it so. She knows even better than we that I cannot lead a free male to the visiting place.”

“Am I, also, to be seen to?” came Chaldrin’s voice from my left, just as I reached the egress to the outer cavern. The male stood within the shadows there, one wide shoulder against the gray of the stone, massive arms folded negligently across his chest. Though a glance about showed Ilvin in the midst of hurrying across the cavern with the clear intention of joining my set, Chaldrin was already in place where my departure was impossible without his notice. I had thought the male too deep in his dispute with Ilvin to bedevil me further, yet had I once again been mistaken.

“Another?” said Dotil with vast disbelief, stepping forward to study a calmly amused Chaldrin. “Should this continue, war leader, our clans will believe themselves under attack by males at your arrival. Also will your numbers be greater than theirs.”

“I find little amusement in this state of affairs, warrior,” said I, the growl in my tone bringing a chuckle not only to Chaldrin but to Dotil and Wedin as well. “The why of my having been burdened by Mida with males without number is beyond me, yet do they surely move to her bidding. Come the time she plans for, the males will serve their purpose and then shall they be gone from beneath our feet. Should the effort not be beyond all those who so ardently wish to ride with me, let us now find mounts and at last be on our way.”

My annoyance was great as I took myself from the cavern room toward the entrance to the caves, so great that nearly did I forget that the kand were kept in a cavern to the opposite side of the entrance. I allowed the strong odor of kand to turn my steps in the proper direction, and then entered the long, close corridor which was the cavern of the mounts. Many kand were tied to either side of the torchlit stone area, each with fodder aplenty to keep it satisfied, and there, near to the front of the area, was the yellow and brown kan which I had ridden and left in the forests. It gave me pleasure to see the beast, and as Wedin and Dotil began the search for mounts of their own, I went to my kan and began to run my hands over him.

“The animal remains sound,” said Chaldrin from very near, clearly having followed after once again. “I, myself, fetched him from where you had left him, for I knew you would need him again. His track was easily followed through the forests, most especially with the signposts so thoughtfully left for us.”

“Signposts?” I asked, continuing to give the kan my attention. “Of what do you speak?”

“The carcasses of those who were once followers of the Oneness,” said Chaldrin, a chuckle again accompanying his words. “Your bow was well occupied during your feyd of travel, as was your dagger upon your arrival here. We observed the entrance of a man alone as we considered the best means of approach to this place, and saw that no sentry attempted to halt him. As he entered so did we, yet did he overlook the remains of the one meant to guard against us, as we did not. Should he have neglected to give you thanks for your effort, allow me to repair the omission.”

“Thanks for an effort which was undoubtedly merely adequate?” I asked, at last turning to look upon the male. “Had I had true skill, they would all of them have fallen to me, is this not so?”

“There are limits to the doings of even one with true skill,” returned the male, amused rather than abashed at mention of the litany he had so often infuriated me with in the Caverns of the Doomed. “Had I been beside you when you came to this place, considerably more of the dross would have fallen to us, yet alone—your efforts were adequate.”

I voiced a sound of disgust with the male, which brought further chuckling upon him, yet before I might take the matter further I detected the trace of a familiar odor. I sniffed, then sniffed again, then turned my head toward Chaldrin.

“What is that odor?” I asked, for some reason knowing the male would be familiar with it. “Much does it seem misplaced here—yet at the same time clearly fitting.”

“I am aware of no odor save that of kand,” replied Chaldrin, testing the air as I had. “From what direction does it come?”

“From there,” said I, nodding toward the far end of the cavern. With that did I begin to walk in that direction, and Chaldrin came behind me, continuing to test the air for that which I had spoken of. We had nearly passed the last of the kand when the male put a hand to my arm, halting our steps.

“Your senses are keen indeed, wench,” said he, looking toward the darkness at the far end of the cavern. “The odor you detected is one I am well familiar with, for the precincts in which I spent so long a time are well imbued with traces of it. It is a vapor called Sigurr’s Breath, and many of the unused caverns below and about the Caverns of the Doomed are filled with it. In slight traces such as here and in the Caverns, it appears to be harmless. In places where it holds full sway its presence is deadly, the power of it able to fell a man full grown at first breath, and thereafter take the life from him. I had not known it was to be found in any place other than beneath our city—and perhaps it is not.”

“What foolishness do you speak?” I asked, at last having recalled the odd odor from the time of my arrival at the Caverns of the Doomed. “How might this Sigurr’s Breath be only beneath your city, and at the same time be here?”

“The Caverns run a very great distance below the ground,” said Chaldrin, his eyes busily taking in all they might. “How far a distance none truly know, for many have been lost in an attempt to learn the truth. Those who have lived to return and speak of their attempts have told of vast caverns, each beyond another, the traversal of which took feyd in the doing. The greatest difficulty was in retracing their paths, for the twistings and turnings were so like one unto the other that those careless enough to make no sign marks of their passage quickly became lost. It seems likely that Sigurr’s city now stands in greater safety than before, due entirely to your having noted a familiar odor.”

“Never have I failed to note that males take great delight in speaking so that a warrior is unable to comprehend them,” said I, standing myself before the male so that he might see my annoyance. “How might Sigurr’s city find safety from my having detected an odor?”

Chaldrin’s broad face took on a smile of amusement. “As the followers of the Oneness chose these caverns in which to shelter and hide their presence,” said he, “it appears they meant to attack the city from below once they had gathered sufficient numbers. Likely the force which was met by the legions of the Sword was the one meant to accomplish the attack, yet there is little sense in considering the matter over and done with. Those of the city will need to block and guard their own entrances to the lower caverns, and then will the threat of attack from that direction be negated. Had you not noticed the odor, those in the city would continue to stand in jeopardy, therefore do they now stand instead in your debt. Why have you wound the leather of your life sign about the hilt of your dagger rather than hanging it about your neck?”

The abruptness of his question and his sobriety took me unawares, bringing to me at first a feeling of outrage. Never in all my kalod as a warrior and war leader had males made so bold as to enmesh themselves in my doings, yet from the time I had begun traveling in their lands, they had done little else. I had long since grown weary of the intrusion, no matter the curiosity which prompted it, and there was little reason to allow it to continue.

“Speak to me first of the reasons for which you were condemned to the Caverns of the Doomed,” I retorted, taking his gaze and holding it with mine. Much did I expect the male to withdraw in insult at the boorishness of the demand, yet he did no more than smile faintly.

“I took the life of a man with my bare hands,” said he, folding his arms as he continued to gaze upon me. “The man gave me great insult, so great that I was unable to control my rage, yet the then Shadow considered the insult insufficient cause for so permanent a reply. He may perhaps have been correct, yet I have never regretted the doing. Should you be unwilling to answer a question I put to you, girl, you need only indicate your unwillingness. Should it become my intention to intrude, I will first make mention of it.”

The cool of the cavern continued to bring comfort to my body, yet the heat of shame entered my cheeks so that I found I must look away from the male who continued to gaze upon me with undisturbed calm. Once had Chaldrin refused to speak of the reason for the condemnation of one of his males, the question having then been put by Aysayn during our time in the Caverns. For him to now speak of his own condemnation was a sharing I had not expected nor, in my opinion, one that I merited. After sharing battle with him I had spoken of my willingness to call Chaldrin sister-brother, as he was male-yet my actions toward him had been colored with the awareness of his maleness and no other thing. The male had done naught to be slighted in such a manner, and would have been well within his rights to offer me challenge for the doing. A greasy, knotted lock of hair fell across my shoulder into my view, and I shook it back with impatience.

“Many are the males who have offered Jalav shame and insult,” said I, the words coming with difficulty. “Chaldrin, too, offered Jalav the same, yet was he filled with sufficient honor to also allow her the challenge, which the others had not. I have wrapped my life sign about the hilt of my dagger for a reason I do not yet fully understand, for I feel a great reluctance to don that which is, in fact, the guardian of my soul. Perhaps the matter will be resolved with the passage of time, yet now I must leave it as it currently stands. Should you wish to give me the challenge, I will not refuse you.”

I then attempted to pass him and return to where my kan stood tied, yet his arm came up before me and halted my steps. With great gentleness did his hand turn me toward him again, and I looked up to see the continued sobriety of his gaze.

“Shame and insult and no mention of pain,” said he, looking hurt. “Is pain, then, a thing you have come to expect from all men as a matter of course? I give Sigurr my most profound thanks that I am now able to stand by your side, girl, to see that no further pain comes to you. The punishment I gave you was at the time justified, yet do I now regret it as I regret little else in my life. In reparation to you and the gods do I now offer a lifetime of service, no matter the length of that lifetime. Should I also find the need to give my life, I will do so gladly.”

“Chaldrin may well find himself eternally occupied,” said I, smiling faintly. “A warrior may indeed expect only pain from a male. Have you no intention, then, of offering me the challenge?”

“I most certainly have no intention of offering you the challenge,” said he, suddenly amused. “I would not have the lifetime I spoke of abruptly shortened, for Treglin is no longer about to reclaim my errors. Perhaps I will one fey try you again with a weapon other than the sword, yet one which is shielded. Solely to be sure, of course, lest you prove yourself—adequate.”

Gentle laughter came to me then, laughter which the male shared, and then did we both turn about and retrace our steps through the dimness to where Wedin and Dotil attempted to choose mounts. Little knowledge of kand did the Summa have, yet was Chaldrin able to indicate those mounts which had belonged to the followers of the Oneness, and I able to speak upon the most important points. The male left us to the choosing, yet had he returned in the few reckid necessary for the Summa to prepare themselves. His mount stood near to mine, therefore did we walk together behind the Summa in our departure from the cavern; the Summa passed through toward the outer air, eager to try for themselves the kand they had chosen, and one who had nearly been forgotten by me stepped out before me, determined persistence visible even in her upset.

“War leader, you must allow me to accompany you,” said Ilvin, her light eyes insistent despite her misery. “I know not where you this time ride, yet must you allow me to stay beside you!”

“Your request seems oddly familiar, Ilvin,” I said, hiding my annoyance. “Upon the instance previous was my word disobeyed, yet this time I will not have it so. You ride to your clan and war leader and a punishment well earned, you do not ride with me.”

“And yet you allow males and Summa to accompany you!” protested the pale-haired warrior, a great indignation upon her. She stood before me with fists clenched tight, body squarely in my path, and much did I believe that she meant to remain so, even were I to lead my kan over her. “Have those who follow you loyally now been relegated to a place beneath males and Summa? Is a Hitta warrior too poor in your eyes to merit a place at your side? It is undeniable that I have disobeyed you, and equally undeniable that punishment has been earned; that punishment, however, need not be given by any save you.”

“You would have me give you punishment?” I asked, with even greater annoyance. It was scarcely my place to punish the warrior of another war leader, save that that warrior chose to stand with naked blade before me—or requested that I see to the matter. I might not honorably deny her request, for the doing was more favorably looked upon by Mida were she to expliate her disobedience directly with she who was disobeyed. I had not the time to devise an adequate punishment, nor had I clan sisters who might be called upon to aid in the thing, yet Ilvin cared not. She knew only that I might not honorably deny her request, and therefore would it be necessary that she accompany me; she now stood before me with a glint of satisfaction in the light of her eyes, no longer taken by upset, no longer indignant. That she showed no trace of smug accomplishment meant only that she retained a certain respect for the temper of a war leader, not that she felt naught of the feeling. I met the newly come complaisancy in her eyes with an anger which did naught to diminish it, then stumbled upon a thought possibly Mida-sent, which cooled my anger. So I was to give this warrior a punishment, was I? So I was to search for a thing to teach her reluctance for disobedience, such as living a hand of feyd in the forests alone, with naught save a dagger? I had not the time for a punishment such as that, yet might there be a thing considerably worse, for which there was ample time.

“So, Ilvin, you would have me give you a punishment,” I said with thoughtfulness, reaching over to stroke the soft brown nose of my kan. “It has given you great upset that I have been sent by Mida among males alone, yet have you neglected to think upon the reason for this. Mida had no wish to put the burden of such a thing upon more Midanna than necessary, therefore was Jalav bidden to ride alone. Should you remain with me and accept punishment from my hand, that punishment will be to learn a good deal more concerning males than your recent capture has taught you.”

“War leader, I do not take your meaning,” said she, the satisfaction no longer in her eyes. A deal of unease and wariness had quickly replaced it, and her left hand had closed about the hilt of her sword.

“My meaning is this, warrior,” said I, a glance showing me Chaldrin’s close, amused attention to the conversation. “Should it be your wish to take mount and return to your sisters, we shall speak no more of your accompanying me, nor shall I allow memory of this exchange to remain with me. Should it be your decision to remain, however, your punishment will be to serve this male beside me, obeying his every command, till my word releases you from the confinement. I shall not intercede in his treatment of you, nor shall I allow the Summa to do so. You will be his to do with as he wishes, and in such a manner will learn some small part of that which Mida wished to spare you. The decision is yours, and may be thought upon no longer than the time you require to join us upon the journey we now begin.”

I then led my kan past a silently stunned Hitta warrior, expecting no further words from her and receiving none. Beyond the entrance to the caves was the sweetly rising light of Mida, gloriously fresh in its rebirth, a golden backdrop to the songs of greeting trilled through the air by the feathered children of the wild. My spirit soared in response to the promise of freedom opened before me, and I vaulted happily to the back of my kan and rode in the track of Wedin and Dotil, who had already gone ahead over the gray of the rock underfoot. In no more than a moment was Chaldrin beside me again, his eyes upon the greens and browns before us, colors which grew warmer with each breath we took and each stride which brought us closer to it.

“You believe, then, that to be my woman would be a terrible punishment,” came abruptly from the male. No tone at all had the voice of Chaldrin had, and I turned my head toward him in lack of understanding.

“To be a slave-woman to any male is great punishment for any Midanna,” I said, searching that part of his face which I was able to see, seeking some sign of the unexplained hurt which I felt rather than saw or heard. “I have need of the aid of a brother, and as Chaldrin did not deny the bond, I had thought I might call upon him to assist me. Should it not be his wish to give such assistance, I will seek another to see to Ilvin. Again it was not my intention to give insult.”

A moment passed in silence and then Chaldrin’s eyes were again upon me. “I am unused to your ways, wench, and therefore have difficulty in understanding what moves you,” said he groping about for the phrases he wished. “It was my assistance you sought when you told the girl she must serve me? Another man would do as well for your purposes, and yet you chose me?”

“Indeed,” said I, refraining from pointing out that I had just said the same. “Though the matter hardly calls for sword use, I had not thought you would object.”

“I do not object,” said he, amused and puzzled at once. “As for the matter requiring no sword use, such remains to be seen. Perhaps you forget that the wench and I exchanged several words. I would ask further, however, concerning another point made by you. You wenches are all of you called Midanna, and none of the Midanna wish to be-women-to men? You, yourself, feel the same?”

“Most certainly,” said I with a shrug. “Each Midanna knows well the fact that males are unable to see to themselves, therefore do they take females to see to their needs. Midanna are warriors, not city slave-women, therefore do we shun the company of males. Had I had any doubt upon the point, it would have been well seen to during my time with Ceralt and his Belsayah. Much did he strive to make Jalav a slave-woman, yet were his efforts in vain, as they were destined to be. Jalav is Mida’s, and none may deny the will of the goddess.”

“I recall our discussion upon the matter of the notice of the gods,” said he, thoughtfully. “For a man to defy the gods is futile, yet must one admire such a man for his attempt.” Silence descended briefly as we left the bare, stoned area for the beginnings of the forests, and then a chuckle came from Chaldrin. “You believe the wench Ilvin will accept your punishment,” said he, returning to our earlier converse. “Should she truly do so foolish a thing, what am I to do with her? You cannot mean that she be given hurt or pain, yet do you intend punishment for her. Of what is the punishment to consist?”

“It must consist of a knowledge of that which obedience would have spared her,” said I, keeping watch all about for the presence of hunting children of the wild. “I do indeed believe Ilvin will accept the punishment, for she continues to believe herself chosen to accompany me. It may well be that Mida sent her behind me so that I might more easily find the presence of the Summa, yet was it the track of another which I followed to where they were held. Ilvin must be made to know her error, therefore must you be unyielding with her, seeing that she serves you as though she were a female slave in your former domain. Should she disobey or displease you, you may punish her without giving her true harm and may, of course, use her as you please.”

“I am also to use her?” said Chaldrin surprised and amused. “It will be difficult to force myself to such a thing, yet will I attempt to make the effort. During the words we exchanged, the wench made comment upon the sole activity a man might be usefully put to, and then suggested that I might well be inadequate even for that purpose.”

“She will discover her error,” said I with a sharing of amusement, looking to Chaldrin briefly before returning my gaze to where we rode. “For a warrior’s sleeping leather, the male Chaldrin may be deemed—adequate.”

“It seems a fortunate thing that my sword word was given in support of you, wench,” said he, a dryness to his tone as his gaze left me at last. “Had it not been, I might well have been tempted to defy the gods by taking a length of leather to their chosen.”

“Chaldrin had best save his length of leather till Jalav bears shielded weapons,” said I, truly amused by his faint annoyance. “He will then have no need to call upon the aid of the gods.”

A gentle heel in the side of my kan sent it forward, leaving no more than the trail of soft laughter to accompany Chaldrin where he rode. Though the male did not merit true insult, it gave me pleasure to serve him some portion of the annoyance he had caused me during my time in the Caverns of the Doomed. Also would his annoyance bring a sharper lesson to Ilvin, who now foolishly thought herself untouchable by males by cause of the presence of her weapons. Too many were the males in those lands, and Ilvin no more than a warrior; were she to attempt true battle against them, she would not live to grow to the skill of a war leader.

No more than a few reckid passed before I sighted the Summa, and less than another hand brought Chaldrin to our set. We four rode through the forests in silence for a time, and then did Wedin ask after Mida and the Silla and my time among the males. The tale truly began with the theft of Mida’s Crystal and therefore did I begin it there, speaking also of the Silla and the manner in which they had attempted to trade their Crystal for males to serve them. The Summa fell to fury upon hearing of such sacrilege, yet was the action not unexpected by those who knew the Silla. I continued on, through my time in Bellinard and Ranistard, through the pain of the device which spoke to the strangers, through the capture of the Hosta and Silla, arriving at last at the words which had come to us from the deep blackness of the device. The strangers had presented themselves as distant kin to use, yet were they known to Mida as evil ones, beings who would take and enslave our entire world. Enemies were they to Mida, and to Sigurr as well, therefore would the Midanna and Sigurri stand together in battle against them.

“This word was given me when I visited Mida in her realm upon this world,” said I to Summa warriors who seemed much taken aback by my narrative. “I was given into the capture of Belsayah Riders, males who are led by Ceralt and his brother Lialt, and it was these males who were used by Mida to bring me to her presence. Telion, a male of Ranistard, also accompanies them, for those of Ranistard have not yet declared themselves willing to stand against the coming strangers as Ceralt and his males have. There will be little need for these others with our warriors and the Sigurri present, yet are they likely to attempt joining our ranks. Mida willing, that will not be till victory has already been granted us.”

“Your time among men has been truly difficult,” said Chaldrin, for the first time bringing me memory of his presence. “Stolen from by those of Ranistard, enslaved in Bellinard, taken to Ranistard in capture—and captured again by those you call Belsayah. And yet no one of them was able to make permanent his hold upon you.”

“No more than the Sigurri of the Caverns,” said I, looking upon the male with something of a smile. “Those males are fools who believe they might hold Jalav of the Midanna.”

“Perhaps,” allowed Chaldrin with the suggestion of a shrug through the thickness of his shoulders, quiet amusement in the dark of his eyes. “The time was, perhaps, brief, yet would I have felt a greater fool had I not held Jalav at all. Even in so short a time did she prove—”

The word, left unspoken, hung between us in a manner which removed the smile I had shown and brought Chaldrin to chuckling. Much did it seem the male would remain insolent forever, just as he had been even in defeat. I took my eyes from him and returned to converse with the Summa, and banished from my mind memory of the use he had put me to.

The hind passed quickly in travel and talk, and soon were my insides rumbling with warning that Mida’s light was near to approaching its highest. Neither Ilvin nor Mehrayn had yet appeared, giving me to hope that Mida had in some manner intervened and sent the male riding elsewhere than upon my track. Ilvin, however, was another matter, for although she had not yet joined our set, both the Summa and I were aware of her proximity. The Hitta warrior appeared to be in the midst of difficulty regarding her decision, and it had been necessary for me to explain her actions to the Summa, who believed it was their presence which kept Ilvin from joining us. Dotil laughed in amusement at the punishment I had proclaimed for the Hitta, then took herself off to seek out that which might be fed upon by our set. Wedin, however, was more disturbed than amused.

“I mean no insult, Jalav,” said she, “yet do I feel the punishment you proclaimed excessive. It is easily seen that I have more kalod than you, and though I am not a war leader, neither am I an innocent. To be bound so to a male will bring the Hitta great hurt, even more than our recent capture.”

“It will bring her considerably less hurt than would have come in true capture,” said I, as Wedin glared at me. I rode with eyes straight ahead, observing the path my kan trod through the forests, my inner eye occupied with sight of things other than trees and leaves and bushes. “In Bellinard was I hung by the wrists and lashed by males, then locked away behind lines of metal the while other males attempted to trade for my possession. In Ranistard I was lashed again, then given to a male called Nolthis, who took use from me which brought pleasure to him alone. Also was I beaten with the swordbelt of this Nolthis, so that the leavings of the lash did not heal. Once away from Ranistard it was Ceralt and his Belsayah who stood my capture, males who attempted to ‘take me from my savage existence and bring me to civilized ways.’ To ride the forests in freedom was savage, to serve a male upon my knees civilized; to hunt and see to my own needs was savage, to do no other thing than take the dust and clutter from a male’s dwelling civilized, to wear a sword and proudly wield it savage, to give eager use to all males sent to me civilized. No thing other than the will of Ceralt was I allowed, no thing other than that done by village females, much the same as city slave-women. Would you have had Ilvin share a capture such as that, Wedin? The shame and pain were so great that I sought to end my life, and was kept from it solely by the intervention of Mida. I had not yet been named war leader to all of our clans at that time, yet would I have you assume that I had been, and that Ilvin had taken it upon herself to follow me. What then would have been her lot? It required the direct intercession of Mida to free me, for I could not free myself; what would have been the fate of Ilvin, who had not been chosen to ride for Mida and Sigurr? Do you continue to believe the punishment I decreed too harsh, despite the fact that this male beside me will not allow true harm to come to the foolish warrior?”

“No,” said Wedin in a whisper, and I turned my head to see the reflection of deep hurt in her eyes. “I had not thought upon what service to Mida might mean for you, Jalav, and now do I clearly see the reason no other is to be war leader to all clans of Midanna. There are likely to be few indeed who are able to show the strength demanded by the goddess, few indeed who have been tested so harshly and thoroughly. The glory of such a place is endless, yet do I give eternal thanks to Mida that another place has been given me. My strength had ever been my pride, yet do I now gladly put such pride behind me. May I ask what assurance you have that that male will give no harm to the Hitta? All know the perfidy of males, and how greatly lacking they are in a sense of honor.”

“None better than I,” was my reply, filled with some faint return of amusement at the manner in which Chaldrin winced at Wedin’s statement. The male had been silent and expressionless during my words to Wedin, yet had I seen the manner in which his fist had tightened, and his jaw had clenched, as though he would have bared his teeth. “My knowledge of this male comes from the fact that I have been in his capture as well,” said I, even more amused at the instant indignation shown by Wedin. “Though my time with him was far from pleasant, it was clear even during my capture that there was no cruelty in him. Also has he a knowledge of the needs of a Midanna. He will give Ilvin humiliation without blood-shame, punishment without soul-harm, all by doing only as he normally would.”

“Sigurr” muttered Chaldrin, looking upon me with brows drawn low. “I know not whether the wench gives me praise or insult! Should I continue to spend time among these wenches, I will soon come to heartily regret my manhood.”

“Should it be your intention to continue to follow the war leader, male,” said Wedin, reluctant amusement upon her at Chaldrin’s words, “you had best be certain that your manhood is not forgotten. Should it be, she will no longer find a reason for your presence.”

“A reason for my presence,” echoed Chaldrin, his brows remaining low though this time in lack of understanding, his eyes upon Wedin. “Should I forget my manhood, she will no longer—” His words ended abruptly as his skin darkened somewhat, and then was he entirely indignant. After a moment he blew out a breath of vexation before moving his gaze to me. “I had not known I was to serve your pleasure, wench,” he growled. “Shall I come to you when darkness has fallen, or am I to await your summons?”

“Chaldrin would do well to recall that Jalav did not take him in capture,” said I, continuing to feel amusement. “It was his decision alone to follow Jalav, all the while knowing that Jalav was a war leader. To fill the sleeping leather of a war leader is a great honor for a male, yet should Chaldrin feel unequal to the task, I would not distress him by pressing the matter. That he has ever felt little desire for Jalav is known to her, yet does one discount such things with one who has been called brother.”

“It amuses you to put the feather to me,” said the male, yet his annoyance was no longer evident. In truth a gleam of amusement had entered his eyes, and then he chuckled. “I feel greatly relieved that you are aware of how little desire I have ever felt for you, yet must I confess to a vast confusion over the duties I am to assume in your service. Never would I refuse the honor of a place in your sleeping leather, yet what of the wench Ilvin? Should she appear and accept the punishment you have demanded, am I to bring her to your sleeping leather as well? And what of Sigurr’s Sword, who will undoubtedly join us before the fey has ended? He, too, will expect a place in your sleeping leather. A war leader of Midanna wenches must surely have the widest sleeping leather known to our world—upon which no sleeping is accomplished.”

“Insolent yet amusing,” allowed Wedin with a chuckle of her own as I looked upon Chaldrin with annoyance. “Once he has been taught the proper manner with warriors and war leaders, he will surely be in great demand among those who follow you, Jalav. Should his ability to please prove a match to his size, you will undoubtedly find it necessary to command rest for him.”

“I will not see him used beyond his limits to endure, Wedin, of that you may be sure,” said I, grimly pleased with the instant annoyance which took Chaldrin. The male disliked the manner in which warriors discussed him, yet had it been his choice alone to follow me. “For this journey the question will scarcely arise, for the male is free and may sleep in any warrior’s leather he chooses—or none at all. As for the male Mehrayn”—and with these words I looked straight upon Chaldrin—“he may sleep in any leather save mine. Should he make the attempt, my dagger will taste of his blood despite any question of honor. Are my words clear to you?”

“Indeed,” said Chaldrin, the vexation having returned to fill his eyes. “You welcome me to a place you deny to the Sword, perhaps believing Mehrayn a generous man. In most things is he generous indeed, yet not with you; to learn what was done to you by Aysayn and myself would perhaps do no more than bring an itch to his palm for the hilt of the Great Sword of Sigurr, the blade he alone may wield. To see me with my arms about you and my manhood deep within you would put the hilt of any sword in his fist, and thereafter the blade in my belly. Should you persist in this foolishness I may well take a length of leather to you despite the displeasure of the gods; I cannot stand beside you if my life is uselessly thrown away.”

“You would have me believe you fear the sword of Mehrayn?” I demanded angrily. “That male may say naught to the one I choose to take for pleasure, else shall he find himself facing my sword! As I fail to fear him, for what reason would you not feel the same? Are we not nearly of a comparable skill?”

“Indeed are we nearly of a comparable skill,” said Chaldrin, and again a dryness had entered his tone. “I am sure, however, that you have never witnessed the full skill of the Sword, else would you speak with less derision at mention of my reluctance to face him. He won his place shortly before my condemnation to the Caverns, and never, before or since, have I seen one to match him. I was the best of the Caverns, girl, and I fell to the magic of your swordplay through ill luck; as well matched as we are, it might as easily have gone the other way about. Give thanks that Mehrayn will not raise sword to you, my fine Midanna war leader; were either of us to face him in true battle, we both would fall.”

The eyes of Chaldrin looked directly upon me, demanding a belief in the words he spoke, refusing to see how angry I was. Wedin attempted to question me upon the strangeness of a male believing he might share a war leader’s sleeping leather, yet was it beyond me to discuss the matter. I assured the Summa I meant no insult, then did I put heels to my kan and take myself from the midst of others, into the forests where my thoughts might be calmed without distraction.

I rode for perhaps three hands of reckid at high speed before coming upon the small glade, and once through it I slowed my kan and turned about, then reentered it and dismounted. I had felt a great need for speed and solitude, yet the speed had done naught save tire my kan, and the solitude had done naught in any manner. The light of Mida had brought the high heat of the land, and once dismounted I was again able to feel it, its presence underscoring my longstanding need to bathe in cool, cleansing waters. I pushed away the agitation within me as well, yet the effort was useless. An unexplained fury blazed high within me, and no thought or deed seemed able to quench it.

Leaving my kan to feed upon grass and leaves I began to circle the glade, attempting to force my left hand from my sword hilt, attempting to allow the peace and loveliness of the glade to calm the swirling disturbance which turned my pace to a furious stride. What disturbed me most was that I knew not why I felt such fury, save that the actions of Mehrayn had had much to do with it. He had given my body great pleasure the last darkness, yet when I had attempted to leave him and ride as Mida demanded, he had given me humiliation equally as great.

“Where do you think to go, wench,” he had asked as I reached a hand out toward my breech, which lay beside the lenga pelt. His palm touched my back beneath my hair and stroked its way down, the broad strength of the hand nearly reawakening the heat in my blood.

“I go where I have been bidden to go,” I gave answer, quickly denying my reluctance to depart. “The sooner I depart, the sooner I shall arrive at my destination.”

“And the sooner find the necessity for facing those other savage wenches,” said he, pulling me from the place where I reached toward my breech, back onto his chest. He lay flat upon the lenga pelt, both hands now holding me to him, a defiance in the green of his eyes which boded ill for both of us. “Yet have you forgotten that you are forbidden to ride without my presence, and that punishment has not yet been given you. I would see the manner in which a chosen of the gods accepts punishment.”

“One accepts a punishment of the gods in silence,” said I, of a sudden more than eager to be away. “It is a method of acceptance deplored by males, yet demanded by the gods. Should Mehrayn continue to insist upon defying the gods, it is a thing he will learn of his own self. Release me now, for I must be gone from here.”

“Must you, indeed,” he murmured, those green eyes upon me, his arms remaining metal-like about me. “You speak of my defying the gods, yet do I see no one other than you whom I defy. Do you fancy yourself a god, wench? To me you seem no more than a willful girl child, one who has earned strict punishment with her willfulness. Had you listened to reason your life would not have been nearly lost, and now you again turn a deaf ear to the voice of reason. Remain here this darkness, and with the new light we shall ride out together, having put all thoughts of punishment behind us.”

“Mehrayn forgets that his thoughts are not the ones to be considered,” said I, beginning to squirm against him in an effort to free myself. “The punishment of the gods may not be avoided by putting thoughts of it from one’s mind. I have not been healed so that I might dally through another darkness with a male, therefore are you to release me now!”

“Sigurr is my witness, I made the effort,” said Mehrayn with a sigh, and then did he straighten himself to sitting without releasing his hold upon me. His gaze was stern and impatient which would indeed have been fitting if directed toward an erring warrior-to-be, and I felt a flash of anger that he would look upon me so. Jalav was a war leader, not the child he had named her! Again I attempted to deny his strength, yet was the effort as futile as ever.

“Apparently you spoke with truth when you said the punishment of the gods may not be avoided,” said Mehrayn, wrapping his great hands about my wrists as I beat at him with useless fists. Without effort were my arms put behind me, both wrists then held in a single hand, the struggle I attempted doing no more than rubbing my bare flesh upon his. “Also did he speak truth when you said you are not to dally further with a man. There will be no dalliance in what now comes to you, wench, and should you find yourself able afterward to take to the trail as you insist you must, I will not fail to see it as the will of the gods. For now it is I who dispenses the will of the gods, and my own will as well.”

He looked deeply into my eyes for a moment before taking my lips with strength, and surely did a trembling begin within me at his words. I had seen no indication of a lash in his possession, yet did it seem that he promised me no other thing. I knew of no other manner in which I might be kept from doing as I must, and although I struggled again to free myself from his hand upon my wrists and his fist in my hair, a numbness had entered me which quickly took my strength. I had not thought Mehrayn would do me so, yet was there ever the possibility that he did indeed move to the will of the gods. Withdrawing from his lips proved an impossibility, he held me so tightly, and then was his demand done.

“I had not thought you would be so anxious to begin,” said he, a dryness to his tone. “Though you greet the doings of the gods with full unconcern, I had forgotten you seek always to do men the same. Perhaps you will now be taught better.”

With such words did Mehrayn then put his free arm about me, and quickly was I turned so that I now lay upon him, belly down upon his thighs. My wrists continued to be held by his hand, and an instant later was my hair thrown forward so that it fell all about my face and head. Again I struggled, confused as to where his lash might be, and then was I touched in another manner, which banished all thoughts of a lash and brought great indignation to me. The open hand of the male had struck my bottom, bringing me humiliation rather than agony, and as he continued to strike me in the same manner, I knew that agony would have been much the easier to bear.

“Mida take you, you may not do me so!” I snarled after a long moment, throwing my head about in an attempt to free my vision of naught save thick black locks, also uselessly attempting to free my wrists. “I am a war leader of Midanna, and may not be done so!”

“You should have been done in this manner kalod ago,” said the accursed male, continuing to strike me with the flat of his hand. “It would surely have taught you moderation in your doings, and would as surely have kept you from greater hurt. Perhaps it would be well if I gave my word to see you done in this manner each time you attempt defiance and disobedience, most especially with the gods. This punishment is most suitable for disobedient girl children, even should it please them to call themselves elsewise. You have been a naughty girl child, Jalav, and now do you pay the price.”

I snarled again in wordless rage, twisting about with all of my strength, yet helpless against the strength of this male.

The male who held me now gained his will, for the accursed strength of his arm allowed him to continue striking me for an endless time, far longer than I was able to bear without truly feeling the thing. I had given him no sound which might be taken for weakness, yet was I shaken nearly as much as I was enraged. Once had Ceralt done me nearly the same, he having pursued me about a tent to strike so rather than holding me as Mehrayn did, and I had then been certain that the punishment was Mida-sent, for the goddess to allow a male to do me so. When Mehrayn released me the thought came again, for surely I knew I could not sit a kan. In truth I thought it possible that walking was beyond me, and so deep was the humiliation I felt that I knelt where Mehryan had put me, my head to the lenga fur, my eyes closed tight, my fists holding my hair to my face so that I might not be seen in my shame. Tears of rage had long since stained my cheeks, yet was such a rage useless, for without a weapon I could not regain my own from the male. And should the punishment indeed have been Mida-sent, even a weapon to hand would avail me naught. I knelt so in silence for a few short reckid, attempting to quiet the shudder breathing put upon me, and a sigh came from the male who had caused it all.

“The pain of a punishment should not be for he who gives is as for she who receives it,” said Mehrayn, naught of the satisfaction he surely felt evident in his voice. “Had I not felt this doing necessary to your well-being, Sigurr would surely have taken me before I was able to find the fill to strike you. I know that once again I am no other thing than a ‘male’ to you, yet do I accept the designation gladly, for I also know that your safety this darkness is assured. A man who is willing to give his life for a wench, must also be willing to forgo her approval of his actions where her safety is concerned. You may lie upon the lenga pelt without concern, wench, for I shall bring you no further hurt this darkness.”

His hands came to me then and removed the mass of hair from before me, ignoring the manner in which I attempted to thrust him away. The shame I felt was greater than the ache he had given me, yet was it necessary that I force my eyes open in order that I might see what I was about. Much had I expected a look of ridicule and derision upon the broad face of the male, a look which would surely have increased my shame, however, sight brought me no such hateful gloating. Filled with hurt were the green eyes of the male, seemingly a hurt for that which he had done. He showed regret, yet was there hurt to match the hurt he had given me. His hand came to brush at the freely falling tears upon my cheek, and then were his arms about me, holding me tightly to his chest. I had no true desire to be held by him for the useless fury continued to fill me, yet was I unable to push away from the warmth of his body and the strength of his arms, as unable to deny him as I had been unable to deny Ceralt. Instead did I cling tightly to him, feeling his lips upon my hair, and thrust away instead all thoughts concerning the punishment of the gods.

In a short while had sleep come to me, and so had I passed the darkness, held tight in the arms of the male who had dared give me the punishment of a child. In some manner were the whippings given me by Chaldrin more easily forgiven and forgotten, and I paced about the glade with fury burning through me, knowing not where the fury should fall—

Knowing not where the fury should fall? The thought brought me to an abrupt halt, a churning in my middle underscoring the sacrilege of the thing. To feel fury toward males was a usual doing, much to be expected when a warrior moved among them, yet the other—

Many times since my choosing had I been given trials and punishment by Mida, shamings and pain and humiliation which I had not questioned when once it became clear that the goddess had indeed sent them. I had at first thought Mehrayn’s doing to be his alone, despite the manner in which he had spoken, and then had come the thought that Ilida moved the male as she had once moved Ceralt. I had been forced to remain in the darkness by the doing of Mehrayn, continuing to feel a remembrance of the weight of his hand even to the new light—and then had I spoken with the Summa and stumbled upon that which brought the Clouds of Seeing. Had I left during the darkness, the Summa might well have been in their sleeping leather, the pouch bypassed in the taking of a different path through the cavern.

I raised my right leg to the stump of along dead tree, gazing balefully upon my life sign where it lay wound about the hilt of my dagger. Though I rode in Mida’s name and would continue to do so, it came to me at last that I was no longer willing to accept in silence the trials she sent.

The light, pretty glade was well paced out by the arrival of Chaldrin and the two Summa. I swung the thin branch I had broken from a tree, as if it were a sword, bringing imaginary death and destruction to the golden light about me, using the exertion as an aid to lightening my mood.

“Ho, Jalav, provender is at hand,” called Dotil as she and Wedin and Chaldrin rode their kand to where mine stood. “A large young paslat happened across me, and though the battle was fierce I was at last able to prevail. There will be much of a victory celebration, and I would be honored by your attendance. ”

Chaldrin chuckled at Dotil’s words as he dismounted, and even Wedin showed a grin of amusement. I, too, smiled at the picture evoked by the light-haired Summa warrior, for the paslat is a small, gentle child of the wild, easily frightened and easily hunted. I joined the three by their kand and looked upon the paslat, pleased to note that the beast was indeed larger than most of its kind. Easily would its flesh feed the four of us, even with my hunger as high as it was. Dotil took her dagger to the carcass and began skinning it, and Chaldrin took my arm in indication that he wished to walk with him to the opposite side of the glade.

“How do you fare, wench?” the male demanded as soon as we were beyond hearing of the others. “When last I saw such rage upon you, bodies dropped lifeless to the ground about us. It was not my intention to give you such woe, and I have come to a decision. Should it become necessary, I will face the Sword as I faced so many others in my time in the Caverns, for I am indeed not without skill.”

His voice was firm and confident with decision, and I halted to turn and look up at him. His dark-eyed gaze did not avoid mine, and decision was as strong there as it had been in his voice. I continued to look upon him for a brief moment, and then made a sound of annoyance.

“You are much of a fool, male,” said I, allowing him to see my displeasure. “Think you I allow you to ride beside me for the reason that I have grown tired of seeing to battle my own self? Should it become necessary to face Mehrayn, it is I who shall do so.”

“He will refuse to face you,” said Chaldrin, folding massive arms across an equally massive chest. “Should it truly be your desire to have naught further to do with him, it will be best if I face him immediately, else must you resign yourself to empty furs. I shall ever be as eager for your use as I was in the Caverns, yet do I refuse to sneak about behind the back of another man. The Sword will allow no other to life with you while he lives, therefore must he be faced.”

The foolishness the male spouted was so incredible I laughed. “Chaldrin, you are most amusing,” said I, reaching my hand up to touch his shoulder. “You have succeeded in lightening my mood, and for that you have my thanks.”

“You believe I jest?” said he, continuing to frown. “You see the matter in another light?”

“Most certainly,” said I with a comfortable chuckle. “Though you continually succeed in putting the point from your mind, I am a war leader of the Midanna. No male is permitted to speak upon the matter of who will fill the sleeping leather of a war leader who is not a captive, and Mehrayn is well aware of this. Should the male appear, he will not attempt to counter my decision.”

“He spoke of this to you?” asked Chaldrin, surprised. “You have his word upon the matter?”

“For what reason would his word be necessary?” I asked in turn, enjoying the feel of my hand against the warm, muscled flesh of the male. Much pleasure was Chaldrin capable of bringing to a warrior, and little need was there to deny myself upon that journey. “Mehrayn is aware of the duties and rights of a war leader, the responsibilities and freedoms demanded by the position. Should he appear, he will abide by that knowledge.”

“And I, the only other man about, am to test that theory,” said Chaldrin with something of a groan, closing his eyes briefly as though at the urging of deep pain. Then did his arms unfold and his hand came to mine, and gently was my hand taken from his shoulder. “With each moment that passes do I learn more of how little you know of men,” said he with a sigh. “There is a great deal of difference between being captive to men and being cherished by one; you have learned much of the first, naught of the second. It is my fond hope that I shall survive till the new learning has had opportunity to come to you.”

He then put his hand to my face before turning away from me, back toward Dotil and the paslet she skinned. I had no understanding of why the male seemed so despondent, yet was that the way of males, to fret over the unimportant. Again I chuckled at Chaldrin’s foolishness, and then followed him to where Dotil skinned our provender.

Our halt for provender continued to be a time of amusement. When once the paslat had been skinned and quartered, the Summa and I began our feeding at once, relishing the taste of the bloody flesh. Not often among males does a warrior find opportunity to feed upon uncooked meat, for males must ever burn their provender to ashes before they find it palatable. The sweet blood ran down our fingers and marked our faces, and a full two reckid of silence passed before it came to me that Chaldrin stared upon us rather than upon his portion, his own provender as yet untouched. A good deal of dismay looked out from the eyes of the male, undoubtedly due to witnessing for the first time the manner in which Midanna feed, and then did a throat-clearing sound come from him.

“Have none of you wenches a need for a fire?” he asked, his voice filled with upset as he looked from one to the other of us. “Is there a ritual you follow which requires uncooked meat for your mid-fey meal?”

“Midanna prefer their provender as Mida has provided it,” said I, refraining from adding that this preference held sway most often only upon the trail. When in their home tents, warriors would also see their provender cooked, yet not to the extent sought by males. “Surely Chaldrin will have no difficulty in emulating mere females.”

Again dismay gripped the male, he failing to see the amusement in the eyes of Dotil and Wedin. The Summa knew I twigged the male, therefore did they refrain from comment. Chaldrin looked again upon the paslat which was his, likely considering the matter, yet did the effort prove beyond him.

“I cannot,” said he, a great deal of distaste behind the words. “Never have I eaten uncooked flesh, as it is said some hunters are able to do. I am no hunter, and I cannot do as they and you. I shall have to build a fire.”

“To stand above a fire in the heat of this land will prove no pleasant chore,” said Wedin, her amusement continuing cloaked, her tongue licking the blood from her fingers. “Such inability to feed properly is no doubt Mida-sent, as a punishment for males who presume and attempt over-familiarity with the warrior they follow. Are you not aware of the fact that Jalav is Mida’s chosen, as well as war leader to Midanna?”

“So I have been told, wench,” said Chaldrin, as he rose to his feet. “I have attempted to mend the matter of over-familiarity, yet do others refuse to have it so. With war leaders and goddesses, a man stands little chance of finding victory in life.”

The sourness in Chaldrin’s glance to me again brought a smile, yet did I see him gone about the matter of gathering wood for a fire without additional comment. The paslat was toothsome and already doing well to heal my hunger, the glade was lovely in its gold and green, and even the grass I sat cross-legged upon brought comfort. I tore off another mouthful of meat with my teeth, chewed with pleasure, then abruptly felt the urge to sigh. The peace of the glade would not be long in continuing, and that was a great pity.

“The Hitta approaches with what seems determination,” said Wedin about a mouthful, her tone held low. “You will, of course, do with her as you earlier proposed.”

“Of course,” I replied, following the movements of Ilvin with no more than the corners of my eyes. Once within the glade she rode to where our kand were tied, dismounted and tied her beast beside the others, then hitched up her swordbelt and strode toward me with the determination Wedin had spoken of. As we sat not far from our mounts, her light-haired form was quickly before me.

“War leader, I have come to accept the punishment decreed for me,” said she, a look about her which spoke of a grim willingness to accept in silence the cruel stroke of the lash. “It is my duty to stand beside you come what may, therefore shall I do so.”

“It is your duty to obey your war leader, sister,” said I, barely glancing upon her as I continued with the paslat. “Apparently you have not yet learned this truth. Should Mida smile, the learning shall come to you in due course, along with a proper regret for having done as you have. You may now approach the male.”

“As you command, war leader,” said she, the resignation in her tone doing naught to lessen her determination. “As I withstood the capture so recently over, so shall I withstand this trial to Mida’s satisfaction.”

With such words did Ilvin then take herself toward Chaldrin, where the male had gathered what wood he required and had set it upon bare ground in anticipation of lighting. The male had paid little mind to Ilvin’s approach, so did the Hitta warrior had to speak first.

“In accordance with the commands of the war leader Jalav, male,” said she, looking down upon Chaldrin, “I am now yours as though in capture. You may do with me as those others did, yet shall I continue as I have ever been—a warrior of Mida.”

“Who is first a girl,” said Chaldrin, keeping his eyes from Ilvin as he coaxed a small flame to life amid the wood he had gathered. “Remove those weapons, girl, and do not approach me with them again save the desire for punishment comes to you. Should I again see you draped about so, without my express permission, it is punishment you will find in plenty.”

Tight-lipped did Ilvin stare down upon his bent back, yet for no more than a moment before her hands went to her swordbelt. Forced obedience is greatly more difficult than that which comes from the heart, a thing Ilvin would soon know well. After her swordbelt her dagger was thrown to the ground, and Chaldrin stood away from the spreading, crackling fire he had begun.

“You may now see to the cooking of my provender,” said he, looking down into light pools of anger which looked up at his calm. “Should you find the need to address me, you shall call me Chaldrin, not ‘male.’ I, however, shall continue to call you ‘girl,’ for you have not yet earned a proper name. You will cook my provender properly, girl, you will bring it to me when it is done, and then, perhaps, we will discuss what hunger you might have. When you eat you will eat at my direction, for I dislike the look of scrawny females.”

Well did it seem for Chaldrin that Ilvin had rid herself of weapons; with his words ended he turned his back upon her and came toward where the Summa and I sat, apparently caring naught for the fury he had bred within the pale-haired Hitta warrior. The abrupt presence of a dagger in his back would have brought surprise to none of us, yet did Ilvin merely turn to the fire and begin to do as she had been bidden, her movements sharp with anger. Dotil laughed softly as Wedin smiled, both unconcerned now over what humiliation was brought to one who was under normal circumstances an enemy. Well they knew that Chaldrin would give no true harm to her, therefore were they free to find amusement in her plight. I, who had begun the thing, found amusement difficult in the face of memory, as difficult as looking warmly upon the male who now joined us.

“Perhaps I am mistaken, wench,” said Chaldrin to Wedin as he took seat upon the grass beside us, “yet does it seem that your Mida has spoken once again. The punishment which was to be mine is now another’s, and I am to have service instead. Perhaps I have found approval after all.”

“The outcome of a battle cannot be known till the final sword thrust, male,” said Wedin with amusement. “Only at that time does one learn the true will of Mida, and then is it far too late to mend one’s ways.”

“Even should one have another to whom the mending may be given,” added Dotil, drawing Chaldrin’s eyes to her amusement. “A true warrior is one who is able to do for herself, in all things able to stand alone. To allow another to stand for you is not difficult, yet does the doing prove the warriorhood of none save that other.”

“I see,” said Chaldrin, his dark eyes now resting upon me. “The outcome of a battle is never known till its end, therefore do you wenches fight on even in the face of what seems utter defeat. To have another stand for you in times of trial means naught, therefore do you ever welcome the call to stand alone. Now do I understand more fully the actions of one who was no more than captive, never a slave; also is my admiration greater, for the point of view is a difficult one to live by.”

“More difficult is the living in some other manner,” said I, sending a glance toward Chaldrin as I rose to my feet. “As we have done feeding we will continue on, leaving a clear trail which you may follow when once you, too, are done. Guard your back more carefully, brother, for that is indeed a warrior you toy with, one who is far from the slave-women of your city. It would bring me distress to learn that your life was no more through naught save carelessness.”

“Indeed,” said he, leaning to one elbow. “It would bring you distress to learn that I might no longer be used to prove a point you mean to see proven no matter the cost. And yet the matter no longer disturbs me, for I feel that Sigurr has taken note of my vow and now means to bring me regret for having spoken it. When the final stroke has fallen, then shall we know the true will of the gods.”

“The male Chaldrin learns quickly,” said I, again amused at the sourness which continued to ride him. “As you are now among Midanna, you may leave all concern over sleeping leather to them. Whenever possible; Midanna consider the needs of males as well as their own.”

“Whenever possible,” echoed Chaldrin, looking up at me where I stood. “Is this a time, then, when my needs are to be considered beside yours?”

“Come the final stroke, the will of the gods will be known to all,” said I, grinning at the male who had shown faint hope ashine from his eyes. “Till then, one may do no more than that which one has ever done.”

“Then I shall be somewhat longer in following than a meal may account for,” said he, annoyance clear in his look and tone as he took his eyes from me. “I will have the enjoyment of a wench for a final time before another of her ilk is the end of me, for I will surely have no other opportunity.”

“Do not tire yourself too far, brother,” I said with a laugh which the Summa echoed. “Should the will of Mida match mine, you will have many further opportunities.”

No more than a growl came from Chaldrin in reply, therefore did the Summa and I gather up the leavings of our provender, dispose of them where the children of the wild might take what they wished, then paused by the tiny rill beyond the glade where we washed briefly and drank deeply. Cold and clear was the water of the swiftly running rill, yet so shallow and narrow that little more than drinking was possible with it. I continued to long for a body of water in which I might bathe, yet did it continue necessary to wait. The two Summa and I then went to our kand, allowed them also a drink at the rill, then mounted and took up the trail once more.

A good deal of amusement was shared by the Summa over the red-faced fury of Ilvin, she who had kept her eyes from us as we departed the glade. Ilvin had clearly heard Chaldrin’s announced intention to use her, and much had she felt humiliated.

Mida’s light had slid some distance from its highest, yet was it also a distance from darkness when we came upon the wide, cooly enticing pond. The heat of the fey had become sultry motionlessness, resting atop the Summa and myself as though it were a thrown lenga pelt, bringing the sheen of sweat to cover each of us most thoroughly. Had Mida appeared and demanded that we continue on past the pond we likely would have done so, yet naught less had the power to keep us from so exquisite an embrace which beckoned like the hand of glory attained. The kand had little interest in the pond save for a need to drink, therefore did we allow them their fill before tying them where grass was within their reach and then turning again to the beckoning. At my insistence did Wedin and Dotil enter the water as I stood guard, for I judged that their need was greater than mine. Though it had been far too long since soothing, cleansing water had last touched my body, it was the Summa who had been in such recent capture to males. I knew well the feelings which held them, and knew also that the reckid of waiting would be much the easier for me.

With their weapons and clan coverings removed, the two Summa warriors dove from the bank into the deep pond water as though they were no more than warriors-to-be, laughing loudly as they each attempted to be the swifter. I watched no longer than to see their heads emerge dripping from the cool, blue-green depths, and then did I turn my attention to the forests we had emerged from. The place we had chosen would suit as a camping place as well, for there was too great a drop between the bank and the water for children of the wild to find the location a favorite one for drinking from. Our kand had stretched their necks to reach the water, finding themselves just able to do so, a thing those with shorter necks would not be able to accomplish. I smiled faintly at the shouts of joy voiced by the Summa which came to me as my eyes moved idly across the forest greens and browns, until I caught sight of abrupt movement. A lone figure emerged from the direction we, ourselves, had ridden from, clearly a male, clearly one I had never before come across.

The male was mounted upon a gray kan, an unassuming mount for an unassuming rider. Tall was the male, and fairly broad of shoulder, yet was he as gray of hair as his kan, with many wrinkles creasing the tanned leather of his face. Little fat marred the leanness of his frame, yet was there a hint of effort in his movements when he drew rein before me and slowly dismounted. The body cloth upon him seemed clean, yet was it far faded from whatever its color had originally been to a colorless shade of light mud. No more than a dagger hung from the belt cinching the body cloth, and also was the male barefoot; to one side of the city-male leather seat of his kan an unstrung bow was tied, bringing to me an unvoiced sense of scorn. To ride unarmed and unprepared through the forests was to purposely seek the eternal Realm of Mida or the endless dark, yet what other would be expected to ride so than a male?

“Good fey to you, child,” said the male as he halted perhaps two paces before me, his voice deep and gentle and filled with an attempt to soothe one he apparently believed feared him. His dark eyes rested upon me with mildness, a mildness which did much to increase the annoyance I felt. I stroked the hilt of my sword with the open palm of my left hand, and met his gaze with other than mildness.

“For one who wears no weapon, you give insult easily, male,” said I, my tone as soft as my gaze was not. “Were I the child you named me, surely would you have already been sent to Mida’s chains.”

“Indeed,” said the male, amusement coming to him with his startlement, his dark eyes seemingly taking in my sword for the first time. “Indeed do you speak truly, wench, and indeed did I mean no insult. From the number of kalod I have lived, all seem as children to me, however you are clearly no child. Your anger would bring me great sorrow, therefore would I have your assurance that I am forgiven.”

The smile he sent was strong all through him, as though amusement held him tightly. I had no understanding of what thing brought him such amusement, nor did I care.

“My anger would bring you a great deal more than sorrow,” said I, voicing a soft sound of scorn. “For what reason have you halted here, male?”

“For the reason that I am weary,” said he, now apparently delighted as well as amused. “I am completely a stranger to these parts, I have traveled far, and have had no company save my own for too long a time. As a cure for the weariness of solitude and travel, I have halted to ask the favor of being allowed to rest a short while in the midst of three lovely wenches. And I assure you that I am entirely alone.”

The male’s final words brought my eyes to him again, for I had been sending my gaze about the forest behind him, seeking those who were perhaps attempting approach the while the male before me engaged me in converse. An unexplained approval accompanied the continued amusement so clear in the dark-gaze touching me, yet my annoyance continued undiminished as well.

“Whether or not you are accompanied remains to be seen,” said I, feeling little friendliness and belief, and showing less. “Your wish, however, is impossible to grant, for there are none about here save three Midanna warriors. Best would be if you sought your wenches elsewhere.”

The gray of his brows rose in a questioning manner, although there seemed little puzzlement in the depth of his eyes. His gaze traveled quickly up and down the length of me.

“So young, and yet so sure and uncompromising,” he murmured, as though he stood alone. “One should know from no more than the look of her, and yet—” His words ceased as he recalled where he stood, and the smile he then sent was of a sudden filled with a deal of the weariness he had earlier spoken of.

“Forgive me, lady,” said he, and this time did the words sound as though they were meant to be heard and heeded. “Frankness is a quality held too lightly by my people, one which causes my tongue to trip strangely. I ask the favor of being allowed to rest here the while, in company with you and your companions. I shall attempt to cause as little difficulty as possible, and certainly shall not bring you harm. Should this be counter to your wishes, I shall go immediately.”

The dark eyes continued to rest upon me, yet without amusement or condescension. At last had the male seen that I had little patience for his sort and had thrown himself upon my mercy, all unknowing that mercy was a cruelty most often practiced by males alone. I had no desire for strangers skulking about and disturbing the pleasure of the forests, yet was there an interruption before I might voice these thoughts.

“Jalav, you have added another!” came the voice of Dotil, amusement heavy in her tone as she halted beside me. Her body and hair dripped freely to the ground by cause of her recent emergence from the pond, and laughter danced spritely in her light eyes. “I do not recall this one,” said she, examining the stranger with her gaze. “Was he among those at the caves?”

“This male is not Sigurri,” said I, prepared to cast a baleful look upon the Summa. “Nor might he be considered one who is ‘added.’ We shall have enough of males in our midst, therefore . . . .”

“Jalav, what occurs here?” asked Wedin, coming dripping to my other side to add her stare to Dotil’s. “From whence comes this male, and whom does he follow?”

“I would follow any—or none,” said the stranger, his eyes moving between the two Summa, delight touching him again. “Command me and I am yours, lovely Midanna warriors, or merely leave me unwanted and ignored. Should I be permitted to remain, the choice would be entirely yours.”

“We have no need of the presence of another male,” I rasped, disliking the manner in which Dotil chuckled and Wedin allowed her eyes to rove about the stranger. “To allow ourselves to be burdened with one such as this would be the height of folly, therefore . . . .”

“Perhaps his presence would be an unburdening,” said Wedin, her eyes continuing to examine the male. “Chaldrin is yours and will use the Hitta when you have no desire for him, and also is the red-haired male yours to use. The presence of one for Dotil and myself would relieve us of the need to share the others, and would be looked upon as a gesture of true sisterhood by us. How say you, war leader?”

At that time did her eyes come to me, and Dotil’s as well, both prepared to abide by my decision. The Summa would not disobey the commands of a war leader, yet had they put forward a request which held importance for them. I truly disliked the thought of allowing the odd, gray-haired male to remain, however the dislike was not reasonable whereas the request I had from the Summa was. I looked again upon the male, his return gaze steady enough yet filled with some odd discomfort, and after a moment nodded once with decision.

“Very well,” said I to Wedin, looking upon the darkhaired warrior with undisguised reluctance. “As the male pleases you, you may have him. Should he prove to have brothers hidden in the forests who mean to fall upon us in attack, however, you and I will speak of this matter again when they have been seen to.”

“As quickly as I spoke to the male himself of it,” said Wedin, amusement in the glance she sent to the male. He, however, took no exception to our words nor to the look sent him as many another male would surely have done, seeming only extremely pleased and also filled with amusement. He had wished to remain, and now would see it so.

“How are you called, male?” asked Dotil, squeezing the drops from her hair as she began to walk about the male in examination. “It would be unwieldy to merely address you as ‘male,’ as you shall not be the only male about.”

“I am called S’Heernoh,” said he, the sparkle in his eyes showing that his sense of amusement felt tickled by the inspection. “I am from a land far from here, therefore do I ask your patience should I behave in a manner in which you find insult. Never would I consider giving insult to such lovely—ah—warriors. And how are you called?”

“I am Dotil of the Summa clan,” said Dotil, completing her circuit to stand again before the male S’Heernoh. “My sister Summa is Wedin, and the war leader is Jalav, once only of the Hosta clan, now war leader to all ten of her clans. You may address us by name, or as warrior or war leader, and need not spend words upon city male foolishness. It matters little to a warrior if the male she uses finds her ‘lovely.’ ”

“And no doubt the thing matters even less to a war leader,” said this S’Heernoh, the dark of his eyes leaving Dotil and Wedin’s bodies for mine, then coming to my face. “Nevertheless does honesty compel me to insist that you are each of you indeed lovely, and I shall not retract the observation. You are each most beautiful, and none with eyes would voice the thought differently.”

At mention of eyes did the male’s own eyes glow most brightly, an odd look which was akin to heat and yet quite different from it. Clearly were his words addressed to me, perhaps to challenge the manner in which I gazed upon him, yet was he far of the mark in his effort to achieve my approval.

“No male cares to voice thoughts other than the same when he looks upon a warrior,” said I, making no effort to soften the edge which had entered my voice. “Nor does he hesitate to attempt to take use from that warrior, she preferably bound at his feet or held by his greater strength. Many males have found approval in the look of Jalav, in the black of her hair and eyes, in the size of her breasts, in the length of her legs; many have called her lovely even as they put their manhood within her despite her protests. She then stood without weapon to hand and was therefore unable to keep the males from her, yet is she no longer weaponless. Beware lest your honesty touch her at the wrong moment, male, and unintentional insult be paid for with your lifeblood. In such an instance would apology be idle.”

Pain and disturbance entered the dark depths which held to me and the creased face worked as though there were words to be spoken, yet time limped past and naught save silence hovered about us. The glibness seemed to have slipped from the tongue of the male as quickly as the amusement had left his eyes, and though I knew not why the male failed to pursue his insistences, I was able to thank Mida for the peace and turn away from the small group which stood unspeaking. My movement seemed to waken Dotil and Wedin, who left the male who had been given to them and returned to the water of the pond, this time taking their clan coverings with them so that the attempt might be made to rid the cloth of dirt and stainings. The male S’Heernoh held his place for another moment before turning away to add his kan to those of the Summa and myself, aware of the manner in which I kept watch upon him as well as the forests, yet seemingly resigned to the doing. In no way might his silence have been bettered, save that he had mounted up and ridden off.

The two Summa saw to their clan coverings and wet themselves for a final time, then withdrew again from the pond. The male S’Heernoh had unburdened his kan so that it might be at ease as it fed, yet had he left his bow with the leather seat of city males, still unstrung and therefore naught save a length of wood. Wedin and Dotil donned their clan coverings so that the cloth might dry upon them, then did they replace their weapons before asking the use of the comb which lay among my possessions. So long ago did it seem that I had packed that comb for my journey that I sighed, and then did I take myself toward the bank of the pond where I would leave my sword, dagger, breech and life sign the while I took joy from the blue-green wetness which awaited me. The gray-haired male was now the concern of the Summa, and well pleased was I to have it so.

Quickly did I take the coverings and weapons from me, and then did I step to the edge of the bank and dive directly into the water. The depth of the pond was considerable even just below the bank, therefore was there naught save pleasure brought by my rapid entry into the water. The blue-green wetness closed over my head with a golden coolness touching me all about, and I slipped quickly and smoothly through dim-colored joy, my hair spread widely all about me. Gentle children of the wild dwelt within the pond, I saw, those creatures called eldod which moved awkwardly upon the land yet flowed like silk beneath the waters, able to stay beneath for periods far longer than any warrior. A large white calf shot past quite close, curiosity bringing it near, fear continuing it upon its way. I smiled at its presence as I made for the surface, for it is said that good luck dwells among eldod, good luck which might be shared by those who chance upon an eldo. I knew I would have need of each blessing Mida might send, therefore was the sight of eldod more than welcome.

I continued to swim about for some reckid, glorying in the feel of wetness upon me, breaking through the shining gold patches of Mida’s light which floated serenely upon the blue-green of the water in each place the leaves above allowed its presence. I remained not far from the bank I dove from—and then a sharp movement beneath the water caught my eye. The eldod seemed in the midst of agitated motion, and diving below showed me the cause of their agitation: the sleekly silvered shape of a hunting toray had appeared among them, its long, sharply moving body attempting to frighten away the adult eldod so that the calves would be easy prey.

Again I surfaced to draw air into my lungs, yet not only for breathing. The intruding toray challenged the peace of more than the eldod, and I felt it should know this.

“Wedin, your dagger—quickly” I called to the Summa, who turned to look at me with curiosity. “We shall feed upon toray this darkness!”

“Ah, toray!” exclaimed Wedin, removing the dagger from her leg bands and throwing it to where I might take it out of the air. “I have not had toray in too long a time. I wish you good hunting, Jalav.”

I raised the dagger in acknowledgment then turned away, swimming a short distance before diving again beneath the warmed surface waters. The water-blurred silver shape of the toray continued to move menacingly among the eldod, its length nearly my height, its teeth prepared to slash at anything unable to protect itself. Four-legged was the toray, for walking about upon the land, with webs rather than claws at the ends of its feet, its teeth alone sufficient for taking its favorite prey, the gentle eldo. The hunter paid scant attention to me as I approached, considering me no more than an odd-appearing eldo, my size sufficient to keep me from being marked as prey, my lack of hunter-speed obscuring all menace from my approach. I closed as far as possible and remained so till my lungs began to demand a breath, rose quickly to the surface to breathe deeply a hand of times, then dove again, until I was upon the toray before it might do more than begin to turn to me. My left hand touched the short, smooth fur of its body as the dagger in my right sought its vitals, and then was I kicking rapidly away, to keep my arm from the slash of dagger-sharp teeth. My blade had penetrated the sleek body of my intended prey, yet had a rib turned the point before it might reach deeply enough to end the hunt properly. The toray had now turned upon me, its jaws gaping wide in fury and pain, a cloud of red staining the water all about.

Again I kicked toward the toray, giving thanks to Mida that I yet retained sufficient air within me that I need not seek the surface, knowing well enough that the toray must now be ended before my need for air grew pressing. The silver shape flashed toward me as I made to twist in the water in an attempt to avoid its attack, my dagger doing no more than scoring deeply along its side, the stroke adding further to the mist of dark red leaking from it, yet doing naught to slow it. Again it turned and again it attacked, and although I was still able to keep its teeth from me, I began to be aware of a greater need to breathe. The long black lines which were my hair floated all about me, threatening to tangle me in a slow, caressing grip which would likely prove deadly, and again the toray came toward me, this time from above. Again my dagger did no more than score it as it twisted aside to rise above me again, and despite the growing ache in my chest, the toray’s purpose came to me with clarity. At intervals was it necessary for the eldod to rise to the surface for air, a thing which the toray required as well; an awareness of this need had sent the toray above me in an effort to keep me from surfacing when the need arose, an interval which would be shorter than the toray knew. The need for air was becoming frantic within me, and although I now attempted to close with the hunter so that I might end it it avoided my attack, preferring to wait till it was no longer necessary to face the blade in my fist.

And then the water was cut by another shape, a large, broad shape of tanned skin and hair of red, driving between the toray and myself in attack at the beast. In the instant before I kicked for the surface I saw the dagger in his fist, its silver blade untouched by the smears which clung to mine. My head rose into the still-golden air and I gulped greedily, seeking to send the flashes of black from my vision, and once I had done so I filled my lungs as I had earlier and dived again, to rejoin Mehrayn in the hunt.

The male had done no better with his attack than I had with mine, for the toray continued to hang alert in the water. I circled widely about the toray where it rested unmoving the beast warily watching the small movements of Mehrayn which kept him from drifting away. A wide sweep of my dagger through the water, back and forth, drew a broad nod from the male showing he understood that I wished him to drive the toray toward me so that we might trap it between us. The attempt was in the hopes that the toray had bled enough to slow it; were it still in possession of its previous speed, it would likely escape, yet was the attempt worth the trying. Toray flesh was sweet and tender beyond many others, and its escape would truly be a loss. The attack would likely be the last as well, for Mehrayn could not have much air left to him, and to continue surfacing and diving would be tempting Mida to allow the toray a run at victory. Mehrayn kicked strongly toward the toray, his dagger tight in his fist and flashing toward the beast—and then were there other shapes about as well, above, and around the hunted beast. The toray had begun a retreat from Mehrayn which would have taken it well beyond me, yet the arrival of the other shapes halted this retreat. In seeming startlement did the toray back through the water directly to me, and this time no rib interrupted the journey of my blade. The silvery body stiffened, shuddered, then grew lax, the mist of red pouring from it increasing, and then was Mehrayn beside it and me, assisting me in raising the former hunter to the surface of the pond.

“Sigurr!” gasped the male when once he had refilled his lungs with the golden air about us, his head flinging back the hair over his eyes. “Another moment and the great god would have been before me, welcoming me to his Eternal Legion. Perhaps it was he who sent those shadows, to aid his Sword against fish and female alike.”

“Those shadows were eldod,” said I with a sound of disdain, seeing clearly that Mehrayn had not the lung capacity of Midanna. “Had the toray escaped us, it would have returned another fey to hunt among the eldod, therefore did the eldod take steps to see that it would not escape. Never before have I heard of eldod acting in such a way, yet am I pleased to have seen the thing done. The memory of lost toray would have soured the taste of whatever else I fed upon this darkness.”

“You mean to eat this?” Mehrayn asked, his brows raised in surprise as he glanced at the carcass we supported between us. “Good fortune truly smiles upon the wench who is able to savor the taste of that which attacks her.”

“It was I who attacked the toray,” said I, amused at the tone and words of the male, shaking the wet hair from my eyes as he had done. “Had the toray found victory over me rather than the other way about, it would not have savored my taste with equally as much relish. Toray have not been allowed to acquire a taste for Midanna.”

“It was you who attacked it,” said Mehrayn, his tone flat, his green eyes narrowed, no note taken of the balance of my words. “Perhaps we had best return to the bank before we discuss this further.”

I saw no need of further discussion yet I had observed many times, the strangeness of males. With a small shrug I began to move with him to the bank, where Wedin and Dotil waited to assist in removing the toray from the water. Two other males stood there as well, Sigurri warriors by the black of their body cloths, the gray-haired male S’Heernoh astand behind all, looking on in faintly amused interest. We brought the toray to the bank, Mehrayn and I, and then did we push from beneath as Wedin, Dotil and the two Sigurri pulled and heaved till the carcass lay upon the grass. Much weightier without the water than within was the toray, and Mehrayn and I found the need to move some paces to the right before we, ourselves, were able to climb from the water. The male, I saw, was yet clothed in the black body cloth he habitually wore, a thing I had no understanding of till he turned about and sent an odd look toward me.

“I seem to have no true understanding of what occurred beneath those waters,” said he, sending one broad hand to push the sopping strands of hair from his eyes. “Upon my arrival did I see the agitation of the pond water and the spreading blood, and then did that stranger speak of your being in the pond. I dismounted immediately, removed my swordbelt, took my dagger, and dove to your assistance. Am I now to understand that you required no assistance?”

“On the contrary, your assistance was quite timely,” said I, crouching down to plunge Wedin’s dagger into the ground before attempting to squeeze the water from my hair. “The toray was attempting to keep me from the surface, and would have attacked me even had I been able to bypass it. Had you not come when you did, my life might well have been forfeit. ”

“Then I am more than pleased to have arrived when I did,” said he, grinning. “It was necessary to delay my departure by cause of the need to pass on your findings and Chaldrin’s thoughts concerning the vapor you detected in the caves, the traces of Sigurr’s Breath. Sigurr’s city will now be safe from attack by the caverns, therefore is it most fitting that you were saved during your own attack against the toray. When darkness has fallen, I will reward you for your assistance and you may reward me for mine.”

The look in his green eyes was most familiar. I squeezed the last of the drippings from my hair, threw the still wet mass of it behind me, pulled Wedin’s dagger clear of the ground, then straightened to my full height.

“Should it be your wish to fill a war leader’s sleeping leather,” said I with a shrug, “the matter may be easily seen to. Should you adequately wipe out the insult given her, she may well consider your use among those others available to her. Should the insult remain standing, however, Mehrayn may look elsewhere for giving and receiving reward.”

“Others?” said Mehrayn with a yelp, the grin abruptly abandoning him. “Insult? Of what do you speak, wench? In what manner am I expected to soothe the ache of your feelings?”

Annoyance had come to fill the green of his eyes, an annoyance which I easily shared. Had he not been male, it would not have been necessary for him to put so foolish a question.

“To assuage the insult given me, you may face me with swords,” I snapped, holding his gaze with mine. “As you have been of some assistance to me in the past, you have my word that I will not take your life. There should, however, be some provision made for your possible wounds being seen to.”

“For my possible wounds being seen to,” he echoed, a flatness now in his tone. “The wounds you refer to will, of course, be those I would force you into giving me. It seems to have left your memory that I have already refused to face you, save that you alone draw sword and I merely stand there. If this is what you wish, wench, I will not gainsay your attempt.”

“Do not be more foolish than your maleness calls for, male,” I said derisively. “You know well enough that I will not draw weapon against one who merely stands his ground, even though that one is male. I have given you challenge for there is now no reason that you not face me.”

“Has something occurred of which I am unaware?” he asked, his face now reflecting deep confusion, his forehead creased in perplexity. “In what manner do you see it as permissible that I face you?”

“In what manner may you not?” I countered, full weary with the thickness of the male. “Are we not now quits upon the matter of life-debt?” I asked. “Though Jalav returned Mehrayn’s life before the keren, Mehrayn has now returned Jalav’s life before the toray. As the matter now stands even between us, we may freely face one another in challenge.”

As the point was of sufficient simplicity for even a warrior-to-be to understand readily, I fully expected the same understanding from the male. What was unexpected, however, was the stunned comprehension which took him, adding itself to the bewilderment which also appeared. Warrior had the male before me called himself, yet did he stare down upon me as though I had demanded that he take wing and fly.

“Am I to understand that you believe a matter of-life-debt alone has kept me from facing you?” he asked in confusion. “It is true I owe you my life, yet the love I feel for you is a greater restraint. I could not strike at one I love.”

“Do not weary me further with male foolishness,” I replied, dismissing the thing with a curt gesture. “I have heard many males speak of this thing they term ‘love,’ yet is it part and parcel with the cruelty of ‘mercy.’ When a male professes this ‘love’ for a female, he is stating to all his intention of taking that female in slavery. As it is ‘love’ he feels, he must be obeyed by the female, and served by her, and must be allowed to take her use at any time desire comes to him. Also has he the right to direct the living of her life, for should she indulge in battle or the hunt, she will endanger herself beyond his wishes. A male may not profess ‘love’ for one who has gone to Mida’s Realm, nor may he give her humiliation for doing as she must.”

“All men—and some wenches—do as they must,” said he, folding well-muscled arms across his chest as he continued to gaze down upon me. “No man will punish a wench for doing as she must, yet will he certainly punish her for endangering herself beyond the necessary by thoughtlessness. Should the occasion arise, I will do again as I have already done, no matter the greater pain brought to me by the doing. And this is the true meaning of love, wench, the willingness to give necessary pain to one’s beloved despite one’s own pain to insure the safety of that beloved life.”

“Then Jalav must certainly be the beloved of many males,” said I, undoubtedly showing the disgust which I felt. “Never have they hesitated in the giving of pain and humiliation, yet have they hidden well the greater pain felt by them. Such courage is truly awe-inspiring, and worthy of endless praise. Should you overcome your hesitancy to face me as easily as you have overcome the deep soul-hurt so recently felt by you, do not fail to speak to me of it.”

I attempted to turn from him then, to return Wedin’s dagger and retrieve my own weapons, yet did his hand come to my arm to halt me.

“I shall not spend words in an attempt to change your view of men and their doings,” said he, his tone quiet yet determined, his eyes the same. “Too much has indeed been done to you for mere words to be effective, therefore shall I continue on as I must, and pray to Sigurr that the truth be eventually shown you. For the moment, however, I would know why such burning need to face me fills you. I have scarcely been guiltless of taking liberties with you in the past, some of which surely brought greater insult than that brought during the last darkness. For what reason do you now insist so firmly that we stand against one another with weapons?”

“No warrior would need ask so obvious a question,” said I, seeing the annoyance which flashed briefly in his eyes, an annoyance which was not unexpected. “I am a warrior and war leader of Midanna, who consider it dishonorable for one of high skill to stand in challenge against one of considerably less skill, save that that other is she who demanded the challenge. Much did I believe you akin to most males, clumsy and with little skill to speak of, therefore did I refrain from pressing the matter of challenge in the past. Now that I have learned the truth, that you stand among the best of your males, I need no longer consider the challenge dishonorable.”

“I see,” said he, his light eyes hooded, his expression thoughtful. “And in what manner did you learn this enlightening truth?”

“The matter was spoken of by Chaldrin,” said I, growing impatient to be about other doings. “He is of the opinion that no other is able to equal your sword skill, and Chaldrin is well versed in the matter of battle and weapons. Should it be your wish to converse further upon the point you may do so with him, for he arrives now with Ilvin. Jalav no longer has interest in converse.”

Curtly did I nod toward where Chaldrin and Ilvin had appeared among the trees, seeing the strangely grim nod of Mehrayn before turning from him for the final time. Had his hand not already left my arm, he would have found me well prepared to tickle it with the dagger I held. Wedin and Dotil, I found, stood some few steps beyond the toray carcass exchanging words with the two Sigurri who had accompanied Mehrayn, having left the stranger S’Heernoh behind with the carcass. It was this S’Heernoh who put a hand up before me, halting my stride before I might pass him on my way to the Summa.

“I am greatly pleased no harm has come to you, war leader,” said he in a soft voice, his dark eyes slitted against the dusk. “That man you spoke with, he with the hair of red—his concern for you must truly be deep and deeply felt. When he learned that you swam beneath the waters of the pond among indications of spilled blood, he immediately dove to your assistance without thought to his own safety. Such concern is rare.”

“It is scarcely a matter of concern,” said I impatiently. “The male then owed his life to me, he believes I ride in the service of his god, and also does he find great pleasure in my use. It is these things which cause his concern, as S’Heernoh shall learn the longer he remains in these lands. Should he wish to retain life long enough to remain in these lands, he had best first learn to be silent upon matters which concern warriors alone, and to keep from their path when he has not been summoned by them. Are my words clear to you?”

“Perfectly,” said he, seeming annoyed and frustrated, he withdrew a pace. “It was not my intention to intrude, war leader, and I ask your pardon.”

A wordless sound came from my throat in response to his reply, for no true words were called for. The male spoke properly self-effacing words in apology for his intrusion, yet did I continue to find annoyance in his presence. I knew not why this should be so, yet it was.

No more than three paces farther were Wedin and Dotil and the two Sigurri, and as I approached, their words came clear to me.

“. . . shall, of course, consider you,” said Dotil to the Sigurri before her, amusement clear in her tone. “Midanna will ever consider those males who wish to follow them, yet not to the exclusion of all others. My sister and I already have a male who is eager to serve us, and perhaps, should he prove inadequate . . . . ”

“We will then be allowed to make the attempt to please you,” said one of the males, clearly exasperated. “You mean to have us stand about till then, praying to Sigurr for the failure of another, so that we might then perform for the honor of a wench in our furs’? Do you take us for slavies of the Caverns?”

“Should you be too persistent, we will not take you in any manner,” put in Wedin, her left hand arest upon the hilt of her sword. “It amuses us to see males skip about before us in an attempt to gain our attention, yet too great an insistence brings annoyance rather than amusement. Should your need be so great that you are unable to contain it, perhaps you would do well to speak to the war leader here. Possibly she has not yet settled upon a male for the darkness.”

The eyes of the two males came to me where I stood, taking no note of the dagger I handed across to Wedin, their gazes immediately filling with startlement which quickly became the approval and heat which was usual when males gazed upon me. Jalav stood without covering or weapon of any sort, and the two light-haired Sigurri grinned well before the male who had spoken earlier slowly shook his head.

“It would give us great pleasure to speak to the war leader,” said he, “and yet speak to her is all we might do. Had we a wish for an early entrance to Sigurr’s Eternal Legions, there are far simpler and less painful methods of beginning the journey than putting a hand to the chosen of Sigurr’s Sword. I, personally, consider it a great pity and loss, yet there is naught I may do for it.”

“I am the chosen of none save Mida,” said I to the male. “Sigurr’s Sword will not share this war leader’s sleeping leather till he faces her, and perhaps not even then. Should it be my desire to use you or your brother, male, you will come to me when summoned.”

“Only should it be Sigurr himself who summons,” said the second male, both continuing to grin well. “Sooner would I face the wrath of a wench than the wrath of Mehrayn. Not for naught is he Prince of Sigurr’s Sword.”

“And not for naught is Jalav the chosen of Mida,” said I, looking upon the two fools of males for a final time. “As you are free I may not merely take your use, yet are we three Midanna free as well. As you refuse this war leader, so shall you be refused by her warriors. Perhaps the Sword you stand in so great a fear of will allow you to return to your city.”

Dotil and Wedin chuckled well at the immediate stricken look which took the two Sigurri males, and then did the Summa take themselves back to the toray carcass the while I continued on to my weapons and breech. Much would it have pleased me to have no males about upon that journey, yet had the presence of Mehrayn and Chaldrin grown to two further Sigurri and the stranger S’Heernoh as well. The matter had moved far beyond my ability to halt or alter, therefore I had to trust in Mida to rid me of the males before my arrival at the visiting. Were she to fail to do so, she would undoubtedly find the necessity for deciding upon another chosen, if not by cause of the enemy Midanna, then surely because of the males themselves.

With breech and weapons replaced and my life sign again wound about my dagger hilt, I hefted the pouch of that which brought the Clouds of Seeing and then resolutely made for my kan. Chaldrin and Ilvin had ridden up to add their kand to the string of those of the rest of us, and as I reached my kan I saw the abrupt appearance of Mehrayn beside the two. The red-haired male had taken a moment or two to wring the wetness from his black body cloth before replacing it along with his weapons, and now his hand fell heavily upon the shoulder of Chaldrin.

“Greetings, brother, greetings!” said he to Chaldrin in so jovial a tone that the white-clad male turned to look upon him in startlement. “How pleased I am to have you join us!”

“Perhaps I am mistaken,” said Chaldrin in a drawl, “yet do I feel that the Sword would have been even more pleased had I not joined this group. Had I been alone it might well have been so, yet the wench I ride with is able to read the forests as another reads the scarring upon his own palm.”

“Not at all, brother,” said Mehrayn, the heartiness dropping from his voice as his hand withdrew from Chaldrin’s shoulder. “I have waited anxiously to thank you for speaking so well of me, better than I had thought you would. A man is pleased to know that another thinks so highly of him.”

“What has she done?” asked Chaldrin with immediate weariness, one broad hand moving to rub at his eyes. “It can be no other thing than the wench, and I would . . . ”

“She has challenged me!” said Mehrayn with such low fury that Chaldrin winced visibly at his vehemence. “She was told how able I am with a blade, and has therefore deemed me able enough to face her!”

“You have no need to accept the challenge,” said Chaldrin, considerable strain audible in his voice. “Her blood need not be spilled in order for her to learn that you are able to best her.”

“Her blood!” hissed Mehrayn, his fury growing. “You know well enough that I could not strike her, yet what would there be to stay her weapon? In no manner would I find myself able to counter her, yet do I also foolishly wish to remain unsliced! And I cannot simply refuse her challenge. If I fail to face her, I will never again be allowed the pleasure of her! Why could you not have told her I was inept, and was named Sigurr’s Sword only through the influence of my family? For what reason was it necessary to laud me to the skies?”

“I spoke without thought,” said Chaldrin with a sigh. “The wench demanded to know the reason I had no wish to face you, and I spoke the truth without thought as to what its effect would be on her. Does she mean to force you to the challenge?”

“By no means,” said Mehrayn in a voice near to a growl, his light eyes meeting Chaldrin’s dark ones levelly. Nearly of a size were those two males, and although Chaldrin was larger of girth, Mehrayn had the shoulder-width of him. “By no means am I to be forced to the challenge,” said Mehrayn, vexation holding him close. “I need not face the stubborn she-lenga till I am of a mind to do so. Once I have faced her she will consider allowing me entrance to her sleeping leather, yet till then I am to look elsewhere for release. Sigurr take me, I have no wish to look elsewhere!” In vexation did the male begin to stalk about, yet a sudden thought turned him back to Chaldrin. “Nearly did I miss the point, so befuddled does that wench cause me to be. For what reason would you need to face me, that it was necessary for you to speak of why you would not wish to?”

The abrupt question seemed one Chaldrin had expected, yet expectation had not heartened him to its coming. Again he sighed, as though resigned to some matter, and slowly shook his head at Mehrayn.

“When once the dark god turns his face from a man, never again does he smile upon him,” said he to a puzzled Mehrayn. “I had thought the Caverns the harshest thing I would face through Sigurr’s displeasure, yet have I found that there are things beyond harshness. I would not retract my vow to the wench even were I able, and yet—I had hoped for more time to stand beside her.”

“You sound as though we had already faced one another and you had fallen,” said Mehrayn, returning to stand before Chaldrin and look upon him with the puzzlement he continued to feel. “From what I, myself, have seen of your skill, a set-to between us would be no preordained victory for Sigurr’s sword. For what reason do you speak as you do?”

“I speak as I do for the reason that I have learned to know men and what moves them,” said Chaldrin, in no manner avoiding Mehrayn’s eye. “A man who is barely your equal will fight you with the ability of a fiend from the depths, should he be given the proper motivation. I have seen your eyes when you looked upon the wench—and could in no manner envision myself doing as she insists and still retain life in my body. Should matters continue on as they are, she will surely have her way, for I am but a man. To put off the inevitable is foolish; would you have us face one another now?”

Mehrayn sighed. “I believe I now understand her reference to ‘others,’ ” said he, both vexation and annoyance clear in his tone. “I see she does indeed seek to force me into facing her, yet would I sooner have that bottom within reach of my hand again. You will, of course, refuse her should she come to you.”

“Refuse her?” said Chaldrin with the faintest of smiles, the while I bristled with anger where I stood. “Have I not said I am no more than a man? The taste of her fills even my waking dreams, the sight of her bringing desire like none I have ever felt. Should she come to me and press those large-pointed breasts into my flesh, touch my lips with the softness of hers, put her hand to me—Would you find yourself able to refuse her?”

“Much does it sound as though you have already had her use,” said Mehrayn in so soft a voice that all amusement left Chaldrin, his smile fading beneath the green of the stare which held him. “This is foolishness, I know, for the wench is mine, yet does it seem that the taste of her is familiar to you. You will, of course, assure me that I am mistaken.

“In the Caverns, no wench belongs to a single man, nor are her origins made known to us,” replied Chaldrin in a voice steady enough, yet did it seem that he looked upon his own death. “To refuse to take use from a wench such as that would have been lunacy, and none of us suffered from lunacy of that sort. As you wish the truth you shall have it: I would not have kept from her even had I know her to be Sigurr’s, not to speak of yours. And quite confidently does the wench assure me that you will have no objection to her taking another man in your presence. Even when she was a captive, said she, her use was free to all who wished it, and no man has ever sought to keep her his alone. Now that she is again free, she insists, surely none will seek to limit her use of what ‘males’ she finds about her. Mehrayn is aware of the rights of a war leader, said she, and will not seek to limit her prerogative. Her belief in this is firm, and should it be necessary to speak words of disagreement, the chore must fall to Sigurr’s Sword. I am more than weary of being laughed at.”

“Laughed at,” muttered Mehrayn, his left hand repeatedly freeing his sword a hand-span and then thrusting it back within its scabbard again. “No man has ever sought to keep her as his alone. The prerogatives of a war leader!” Then were his eyes blazing. “What am I to do?” he demanded, as though the other male held knowledge which he refused to share. “in Sigurr’s name, tell me what I am to do! In all my kalod of life, in all my kalod as Sigurr’s Sword, never have I felt so helpless! She will listen to no word I speak, for she has been taught that men speak ‘foolishness’ and lies, and is able to find trust in none of us through what has been done to her! And above that, she rides in the service of the gods! Any man who attempts to distract her pits himself against the gods! Willingly would I stand with sword in hand against any being who ever lived, yet how am I to challenge the gods for her? Every man who has attempted to do so has been thrown aside by them, as so much refuse! Tell me what I am to do!”

“Brother, I cannot,” said Chaldrin in a voice filled with pity, his hand going to the shoulder of Mehrayn, who now stood with head down, as though in defeat. “My lot is simple in that I merely need follow her and stand with her, even should my life be forfeit. Had I the need to stand between her and her goals so that I might be seen and taken note of—fear of the wrath of the gods would surely drive me shuddering to my knees, not to speak of having to interrupt the wench’s single-mindedness relating to her devotion to duty. Those who attempt to stand before her in the path she was set upon by the gods must face that blade of hers—and the skill which few have ever attained. Should you need the assurance of one who was foolish enough to face that blade, I give you my word that she will never fall without taking her due. Glibly did I tell her that you would easily best her were you to face one another, and perhaps this would be so. In full truth do I say to you that you would not go unscathed even were you to triumph over her, for she fights as none I have ever faced.”

“I have no wish to face her,” said Mehrayn, his head slowly rising from its position of defeat. “As Sigurr is my witness, I shall never face her. My sole desire is to hold her forever in my arms, and this I shall do though every god who ever was stands in denial. I know not how I shall accomplish this, yet I shall. In this, above all other things, I shall not be bested. And you, my friend, had best watch your step.”

Briskly did he clap Chaldrin upon the shoulder and then take himself off, a determination about him so strong that both Chaldrin and I could do no more than stare silently after him. Some time had it been since confusion had swirled so thickly about me, yet had it not lost its ability to set my head to spinning. What the words of the male meant I had no true idea, yet did one small part of it disturb me considerably. As I had already put away the small sack in among my belongings, I left the side of my kan to walk to Chaldrin where he still stood gazing after Mehrayn.

“What does he mean to do?” I asked, drawing Chaldrin’s immediate attention. “Of what does he speak, and what does he mean to do?”

“You heard?” asked Chaldrin, looking down at me. “Should you have heard all which passed between us, you must know as well as I that he means to make you his alone. I have seen you beside him, wench, when indignation did not ride you as a warrior upon a kan. You cannot mean to deny him.”

So quietly did Chaldrin speak, with calm acceptance in both tone and eyes, his gaze firmly upon me, his fingers resting upon his swordbelt. Broad and strong and calm was Chaldrin as he stood in his white body cloth looking down upon me, yet was he no more than a child speaking upon matters he had no true understanding of.

“I have no need to deny him,” said I, feeling quick anger at such colossal foolishness. “It shall be Mida who denies him, as she has denied others, this time, perhaps, with Sigurr’s assistance. And not again shall I barter my soul to reclaim the life of one who stands against the will of the gods. Not again.”

I turned and strode quickly away from Chaldrin, aware of his wish to speak further upon the matter, yet unwilling to be drawn more deeply into useless male foolishness. A few steps into the forest and our halting place was gone from easy sight, yet did I continue on till I was well away, beyond sound of the others as well as sight of them. The lowering heat of the fey was again oppressive, taking the cool so recently given my body and turning it to small rills of sweat, save for where my still-wet hair touched me. My left palm rubbed fretfully against the hilt of my sword as I strode back and forth before a large, old tree, seeking to calm the mountainous turmoil which threatened to whirl me away forever from the sight of all.

The vanity of males! He who was pleased to call himself the Prince of Sigurr’s Sword had come firmly and strongly to the decision that Jalav was to be his, therefore was Jalav not to deny him! Such a decision had Ceralt made, and nearly had Ceralt lost his life for the doing! Was I to again stand between a male and his fate, accepting agony and terror beyond description so that he might be saved from that which he had so willingly and casually set himself to?

I put a hand to my middle at the strong flash of illness which clawed through my inner flesh, knowing I would not survive another such attempt. The very thought of it froze me where I stood, taking the strength from my knees and threatening to send me senseless to the ground. A war leader of Midanna should know no fear, yet had this war leader learned the true meaning of terror, and surely would such lessons keep her from acting in defense of one whose absence was an ache deep in the chest—and whose presence was constant irritation. To put such a demand to me again was beyond reason. I put a hand to the rough bark of the tree I stood beside, and in Mida’s name did I vow it. Not again!

Fully a hin must easily have passed before I again joined those who traveled with me. Our halting place had become our camping place, and the first thing which came to me was the aroma of roasting toray, the cooking of which had become the chore of Ilvin. Flushed and sweating did she stand above the fire which had been set, and that despite the fact that the wet of her hair spoke of her having been allowed to bathe. The male S’Heernoh also seemed badly in need of cooling and washing, for it was he who labored on in an attempt to skin and gut the balance of the toray. Red to the elbows were his arms in gore, the same smeared here and there upon his body. Much did it seem that he somehow felt put out, and sight of his annoyance brought a smile to my lips. It pleased me that Wedin and Dotil received a full measure of service from the male they had allowed to follow them, service the male may not have expected to give. Midanna warriors are firm with those males who give them allegiance, so that the males will not mistake their place. Full Midanna warriors were the Summa, and this the male S’Heernoh would learn.

Mehrayn sat to one side of the camp with his males, his large body stretched at ease upon a cloth-covered lenga pelt, the other two to either side of him, all three conversing casually in low tones. Somewhat farther about the camp sat Chaldrin and the two Summa, the warriors speaking, the male merely listening. None save Ilvin took note of my reappearance from among the growing shadows, the unfinished pipe I had set myself to carving held in my hands. The Hitta’s eyes met mine above the fire she stood near, a streak of something dark upon her left cheek, a look of bridled fury within the gaze she sent me. The warrior in her chafed at the tasks she had been set to as though she were a city slave-woman, however she had not as yet been touched by any part of the knowledge which would have come to her had she been in true capture. She continued to feel herself justified in following me, a thing shown clearly in the stubborn set of her body which remained even after her head had lowered at my approach.

“Chaldrin has not yet spoken of what pleasure he had when you were earlier made to serve him,” said I very softly as she poked at the cuts of toray with the blackened end of the stick she held. “Were you made to serve well?”

Her body stiffened yet further at my words, and the face which raised to me had darkened with anger.

“It is beyond me why you allow that one to follow you, Jalav,” said she, affronted indignation thick in her voice. “The male is impossible, and much would it please me to put the point of a blade in him! Come the fey I am no longer bound to him, I shall face him no matter the cost!”

“There are some costs, warrior,” said I, “which are beyond a Midanna’s ability to meet. You have given your word to obey this male in all things till I release you from the vow. The male is looked upon by me as a brother, and I would not care to see him harmed. What would be the cost to you, Ilvin, if I were to fail to release you from your vow? Would you see yourself forsworn?”

With the query Ilvin turned pale. No longer were there words in her throat nor fury in her widened eyes, and I stood but a moment longer before turning from her toward the kand, where I would put my unfinished pipe away beside the sack which would soon fill it. The kand had been seen to and were quiet and satisfied some already dozing where they stood, Gandod, in their place, would have been in fighting temper, the manner in which they ever greeted the coming darkness, the time of fey they most preferred to vent their fury upon one another. For that reason were gandod mounts to warriors alone, for males cared little for attempting their taming. Without disturbing the drowsing kand I exchanged pipe for comb, then went to seat myself between Chaldrin and the Summa.

“The followers of you both see well to our needs,” said I to male and warriors, settling myself upon the thick, soft grass before taking up the comb. “I eagerly anticipate the cut of toray which will be mine.”

“Cooked toray,” said Chaldrin with a growl, bringing forth chuckling from Wedin and Dotil. “I had thought the great Midanna warriors preferred uncooked flesh to fill their bellies. For what reason do you now see it cooked?”

“For the reason that we wish it so,” said I, glancing in amusement at the male. “Midanna warriors do as they please, a thing Chaldrin will come to know well.”

“Chaldrin is already aware of that thing,” said the male, his voice filled with annoyance. “Would that he were able to take a switch to another of their number as easily as he did with that yellow-haired wench.”

“You gave punishment to the Hitta?” asked Wedin as I turned a frown upon Chaldrin for his insolence. “For what reason was it necessary that you do so?”

“For the reason that she presumed,” said the male, sending his calm, dark-eyed gaze to the Summa. “When I was done with my mid-fey meal and informed the wench she would then serve me with her body, she in turn informed me that she had ever taken from a male, never having been taken, and would serve me only in that manner. I cut a switch and whipped her till she screamed, then taught her the proper manner of accepting a man. Once taught, she was able to do no other thing than obey me completely. Well may she be Midanna, yet is she first and most thoroughly female.”

The silence of hard-eyed blood insult settled upon the two Summa, clan commitments forgotten in the face of such treatment toward one of their own. Few others save the Silla among the enemy clans would see another Midanna savaged so by a male without feeling rage, yet were the eyes of Chaldrin upon me rather than upon those who were near to giving him challenge. I considered the words he had spoken very briefly, then did I make a sound of derision.

“So my brother seeks to give insult and anger,” said I, allowing my gaze to hold his as I moved the comb slowly through the tangles of my hair. “Perhaps it would be well to inform him that should he be challenged, his sister would be honor-bound to stand beside him in that challenge. Also, should he bear the remains of a wound which might well hamper him during battle, honor would also demand that she stand alone in that challenge. Is this what Chaldrin wishes?”

The calm quickly fled the gaze of the male as his hand went to the white cloth about his middle, consternation and alarm immediately replacing that calm. The thick brows of Chaldrin lowered as he sought to look within me, and then did his eyes move to Wedin.

“She puts the feather to me again, does she not?” he asked, the rumble of his voice fainter than it normally was. “You and she are the same, you ride in service to the same goddess, you laugh and speak together as sisters. She would not face you above blade edges, nor would you face her.”

“Honor demands no other thing,” answered Wedin, her tone stiff and devoid of all friendliness. “Even should the war leader deplore your actions, she is bound to stand beside or for you, just as we are honor-bound to stand in challenge. Think you sisterhood comes before honor? Without honor, sisterhood would be idle.”

Deep frustration took the male then, anger also coming at sight of my smile. I had truly fathomed Chaldrin’s intentions, and had negated them by doing no more than speaking truth.

“The demands of honor!” growled the male, as though he spoke of things accursed. “Honor should be left to men, for wenches will ever overdo a thing. For what reason did you fail to believe me?”

“For the reason that I have come to know you,” said I, returning my attention to the snarls of my hair. “Chaldrin is not a male to gloat over having beaten and taken a female against her will. He is not above doing such things, I know, yet is he above gloating over them.”

“He did not do the Hitta as he said?” demanded Wedin, confusion clear in her voice. “War leader, the male lied?”

“He did indeed,” said I, seeing the amusement in Chaldrin over my previous words. The male chuckled to himself, for he knew I had again spoken truth. “Perhaps he would now care to speak of what truly occurred between Ilvin and himself.”

All eyes went to Chaldrin where he sat, and the male returned each gaze before shaking his head. “The beliefs of the wench as to how she must be used were no lie,” said he, a sigh of capitulation taking him. “Well might I have acceded to her needs, for I have no true ownership of her, yet was her manner of informing me of those needs distasteful. Much was I made to feel that my ownership was hers, and also was I moved to suggest, in mockery of her tone, that she need not beat me as she seemed eager to do. The wench immediately informed me that my plea was rejected, took up the switch that Jalav had been swinging all about, then had at me. I found it prudent to take the switch from her, gave to her the number of blows she had managed to give me, then put her to her back. She made no more sound at the feel of the switch than had I, yet was her body afterward eager to give me the pleasure I sought. In no manner is a wench able to deny the man who beats her, for she wishes to placate him so that he will not beat her again.”

The eyes of the male became bland, a hidden smile barely turning the corners of his mouth. Well did he know that I had heard such a statement before from him, immediately following the first occasion he had taken a whip to me. The urge toward anger rose high within me as memory was returned of that time, yet was I aware of the intent of the male, and therefore did I smile rather than frown, and turn my head toward the affronted dignity of the Summa.

“My brother seeks to have us eject him from our midst,” said I, drawing the bristling glare of both warriors. “He knows he will serve me this darkness should I demand it, therefore does he seek to keep the command unspoken. His words of insult are as deliberate as the lies he spoke, for he wishes to provoke anger within me. I would have you understand this, so that no difficulty is given him.”

“By the blessed sword of Mida the Golden,” growled Wedin, her eyes angrily going to Chaldrin. “Another moment and challenge would have been his rather than ejection! For what reason does he seek to avoid serving you, Jalav? Is he now unable due to having used the Hitta?”

“I seriously doubt his inability, Wedin,” I said, turning my gaze to a Chaldrin who was once again wrapped deep in frustration. “He seeks to deny me, as was asked of him by another.”

“Demanded of me,” said Chaldrin, a sourness all through him. “The words were a demand, wench, not a request, nor do I take umbrage at the demand. A man has his rights.”

“As a wench has her needs,” said another voice, and then did Mehrayn appear to seat himself upon the far side of Chaldrin. “Ever has it been the right of a man to see happily to the needs of his wench, as I shall do for you. When our repast is done, my furs are yours.”

“Jalav has no need of the furs of merely any male,” said I, my voice and gaze equally cold. “Jalav will share pleasure with one who does not fear to face her, with one who is willingly called brother. The male Mehrayn may say naught upon this decision.”

“The male Mehrayn has much to say upon a decision such as that,” said Mehrayn, his eyes continuing calm, his voice gentle. “The male Mehrayn has respect for the wishes of she who is the war leader Jalav, yet are there certain matters in which he is not to be gainsaid. A man who feels such love as I feel for you, Jalav, cannot bear to see another man touch his woman. It would have given me far greater pleasure to have slain the filth Nobain with my bare hands, for he caused you great harm and agony and would have forced himself upon you. I feel no similar fury toward Chaldrin here, yet should you persist in tempting him out of anger toward me, I will surely call him out. Do you wish to see him slain through no fault of his own?”

The calm, unangered eyes of Mehrayn remained upon me, perhaps deliberately ignoring the hand Chaldrin had put to his own eyes, as though he were touched by pain. Wedin and Dotil exchanged looks of confusion, understanding little of what occurred, yet was it clear that Chaldrin had spoken the truth earlier in the fey. Although I found belief upon the point difficult, Mehrayn did indeed seek to fill my sleeping leather to the exclusion of all others. Such foolishness might be found among no others than males, and even had I not already determined to turn from Mehrayn, I would not have allowed it to continue.

“He who gives challenge to my brother gives challenge to me,” said I, repeating the point for the benefit of those who had no true understanding of it. “As my brother bears a wound which would slow him, it is I alone who shall stand to the challenge. In a meeting such as this there may, of course, be no quarter given, no thought of keeping back the slaying stroke. When and where are we to meet, male?”

“We are not to meet,” said Mehrayn calmly. “Should the need arise it is Chaldrin whom I shall meet, wound or no, with your approval or without. You shall not stand for him nor even by him, for your insistances make this a matter between men. You have little understanding of this state of affairs, I know, therefore do I attempt to teach you of it. Was there naught between us I would say no word upon your doings, for I would not have the right. Did you not continue to be held by childish anger and petulance I would say no word for there would then be little need. There shall ever be a place for you beside me in my furs, therefore need you no longer torment this man. Come to me and allow me to ease your need as I have done in the past, and we need say no more concerning meetings and slayings. I shall hold you near to me as gently or as strongly as you wish, and we shall both banish all thoughts of anger and disagreement.”

Earnestly did the male look upon me as his words ended, and though I felt the warmth and strength of the arms he spoke of I was also able to recall his vow to challenge the gods. Much did I wish to put my hands to my face and hide myself from the thought of that challenge, but that was impossible. Well did I know that were the male to stand in jeopardy I would not find myself able to deny his need, despite the curling fear in my soul, despite the agony and terror I would face. I would need to face again that which few were able to survive a first time, and my courage flagged and faded with the thought of it. Far better that I send the male from me, to pursue another who was not possessed jealously by the gods.

“The male Mehrayn is mistaken,” said I, again sending the comb calmly through my hair. “There is naught between us to be considered, naught which moves me to a wish for his use. As for my brother Chaldrin, he has been accepted in the service of Mida. Should he be slain, the war leader Jalav shall avenge him, even against one who will not raise sword to her. Then shall there be two who are slain, and Jalav shall continue on in the service of the gods—without males to bedevil her. You seek a thing which is not and never shall be, male. Seek it elsewhere, and all may survive to face the strangers.”

It was not possible for me to keep my gaze upon him, yet was I aware of the hurt and rage which drove him to his feet and away from where I sat. Mehrayn had no further words to speak, which was truly a blessing, yet would a greater blessing have been for Jalav to fall senseless to the ground. With no more than a few angry strides was the male gone entirely from me, and already had the ache of his going begun deep within. Mehrayn was denied me as Ceralt had been denied me, yet the ache came as though the matter might be done otherwise. A great fool was Jalav, and more than a fool, to feel such a thing for those who would never be hers.

Few words were exchanged among those in our camp before the toray was done, even the Summa refraining from questioning me upon that which had occurred. Chaldrin went and fetched my toray and his, and I took it and fed upon it even though I had lost all desire for it. The hunger of healing continued to be with me, and for that I gave silent thanks to Mida; the eyes of Mehrayn glowered from across the camp, and I had no wish to appear indecisive before him. I had sent him from me, and there he would stay.

With the toray fed upon I completed the combing of my hair as best I might, and then did I return the comb to its place upon my kan. Ilvin and the male S’Heernoh had both gone briefly into the pond to wash themselves, and as darkness had already fallen all those about the camp prepared to take their rest. The crackling fire cast shadows all about as S’Heernoh joined the Summa, and Chaldrin looked up as I halted before his cloth-covered lenga pelt. Even with the cloth the fur would be overwarm to lie upon, yet for once Mida’s bare ground held little attraction for me. Chaldrin looked upon me where I stood silent and unmoving, joined my silence for a moment, then turned his head toward Ilvin.

“Girl, go to those Sigurri warriors who ride with the Sword and tell them you are theirs for this darkness,” said he to Ilvin, his tone gentle yet firm. “Should they be uninterested in the use of a wench, seek a solitary place to take your rest. You are not to return here.”

Ilvin, clearly distressed, parted her lips to speak, yet did the words die on her tongue when her gaze met mine. There was naught she might do save obey no matter the humiliation obedience brought her, and the realization of this truth took her away into the shadows. With her departure Chaldrin sighed, patted the cloth beside him, then waited till I had lowered myself near him before he spoke.

“So you would slay the Sword if he were to slay me,” he murmured, his eyes upon me though I looked only at my folded legs. “Your honor would demand such a thing, I know, and I also know you capable of doing what must be done. Despite all, I feel compelled to ask: would you truly find it within you to cut Mehrayn down? I speak of no other, mind you; solely Mehrayn.”

The cloth-covered pelt beneath me was warm and yielding, calling comfort to my weary body. I opened my swordbelt and removed it then put it aside, yet were there still no words to reply with. Chaldrin had said I had spoken untruth, yet was there naught of insult felt within me, for he was correct. I would not have found myself able to strike down Mehrayn, no matter the cause, no matter the provocation.

“So I thought,” said Chaldrin with a further sigh when it was clear I would not reply to him. “It would not be possible for you to slay him, for you feel for him what he feels for you. For what reason then, have you entirely denied him?”

“He would throw his life away in an attempt to wrest me from the gods,” I whispered, the pain of the thought touching me again. “I would buy back his life as I did with another, yet do I fear I no longer have the strength. He would be lost then, and I likely surviving to recall my failure, and all would be far more unbearable. Far better that he find belief in my words, and ride elsewhere to seek another.”

“And this you believe he will do.” The words of Chaldrin were without inflection, neither giving support to the comment nor questioning it. I raised my eyes to look upon his shadow-darkened face, then nodded my head.

“He shall do so for I shall see to it,” said I, lifting one hand to stroke it slowly down his arm from his shoulder. “I have no understanding of the reason he dislikes the thought of my use of another male, yet am I able to understand that such use speaks of there being naught between us. I had desired the pleasure of you for this darkness, brother, and now do I have need of it as well. Am I to be refused?”

The eyes of Chaldrin continued to rest upon me from out of a shadowy visage, his silence and the darkness keeping his thoughts from me. Much did I begin to believe that he would indeed refuse me, and then his hand came gently to my face.

“Had you demanded my agreement I would surely have refused you,” said he, with resignation in his voice. “Had you sought to bring anger or jealousy to the Sword, I would also have refused you. However, as your intentions are honorable, and as I cannot refuse you when you call me brother in such a voice—”

His words ended as his arm came to my waist, and then was I lifted back to lie upon the cloth-covered fur away from the fire, the back of Chaldrin turned toward it. The hand of the male caressed my breast a brief moment before lowering to the ties of my breech, and then were his lips beside my ear.

“The Sword does not dislike the thought of another man possessing you,” Chaldrin murmured, slowly opening my breech and pulling it away. “The thought is abhorrent to him, as it would be to any man with sense. Should your schemings go counter to your expectations I am likely a dead man, and yet—” His hand, moving between my thighs, drew a soft gasp from me as my hands went to his arms, and gently he chuckled. “And yet, my girl, this will be the first I have had willing use from you. Perhaps the cost is not unreasonable.”

His lips came to mine as the heat began to rise within me, brought about by his touch upon my womanhood and the feel of his thickly muscled body against me. Well had I known that Chaldrin would have the ability to cause me to feel so, and deep was my need for strong pleasure without thought. Had it not been foolish I would have wished Chaldrin to be another, one who filled more than the emptiness Chaldrin would fill, yet was it indeed foolishness and idle as well. Again I moaned, beginning to lose myself, and such was surely for the best.