Under the Boardwalk

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

Quinn stood alone in Damon’s office with a bank of screens in front of him. It was almost over. He’d turned over a week’s worth of tapes from the counting room, and government men were working around the clock to find the discrepancies that would lead to Damon’s arrest and a warrant to search further. His head buzzed with the anticipation of a job almost completed. So much so that when his cell phone rang, he almost didn’t hear it.

He picked up just in time. “Donovan.”

“Quinn, I can’t find Sam, and Dee said Spank’s gone, too,” Elena said, in an obvious panic.

His stomach churned. “You’re kidding?” he asked, but he knew she wasn’t. “Okay, sit tight. I’ll find her.” He hung up and groaned, then called down to the bar and asked Connor to send Ari to see him.

Five minutes later, she burst into the room. “What’s wrong?” she asked, out of breath, concern on her beautiful face.

“Sam and Spank have gone AWOL.”

She narrowed her gaze. “Missing?”

He nodded. “And it’s not like I can put out an APB on a blonde teenager and her sidekick monkey. Hell, it’s not even like I can leave here.”

She walked over and pulled him into an embrace. “I’ll handle it,” she promised him.

He inhaled deep, the scent of her fragrant hair and her bodily warmth reassuring him. “I know you will.”

“Does she know where you live?” Ari asked.

“Yeah, so that’s one place you can check. The rec center’s another.” Beyond that, he didn’t want to think of the places a young girl could get lost. The only saving grace in this situation was that a teenager traveling with a monkey as a companion couldn’t get far without being noticed.

“I’ll call you as soon as I know something,” Ari promised, and started to dig through her bag, which she’d placed on a countertop. “Yep. I have my cell.” As she turned, the bag fell to the floor, contents spilling all over. “Darn it.”

She knelt and he helped her pile everything back inside. “It’s because you’re nervous. Try to remain calm while you’re looking, okay?” he said as they rose to their feet.

Her gaze met his and quickly, almost as if she didn’t want to give herself time to think, she leaned close and covered his lips with hers. Knowing he had mere seconds, he laced his arms around her waist, deepened the kiss, and pulled her close. He intended to take advantage of what she’d offered.

Tipping her head backwards, she let her tongue slip effortlessly into his mouth and tangle with his. Her body went slack, molding against him, and as her nipples puckered beneath her T-shirt, his body tensed with desire and longing.

She must have felt it, because her legs parted, letting the hard ridge of his erection slip between. Clothing provided a frustrating barrier, but one that allowed him needed time to think.

“Sam,” he muttered, pulling back.

She nodded, wiping the back of her hand over her damp lips. “I have to go.” Regret tinged her voice and she didn’t jump to fix her rumpled shirt or reapply her lipstick to her well-kissed mouth.

“Don’t forget to keep your cell on,” he said.

“I’ll call.” Seconds later, she was gone.

• • •

Prior to Sam’s disappearing act, Ari had spent a long night on her feet. She’d been filled with anxiety, knowing Quinn was getting ready to wrap up his case and end his association with Damon-she didn’t know the details of how things would go down. Worry for his safety consumed her, and though she’d promised herself she’d let him do his job, she couldn’t help peeking around corners, hoping for a glimpse of his handsome face. She needed Quinn’s smile or a quick nod of his head to reassure her everything would be okay.

Once Quinn had called her into his office, she’d been so relieved to see him, she’d dropped the reserve she’d been building between them. She had counted on that reserve to enable her to return to her uncomplicated life in Vermont.

Between her earlier concern over Quinn and the new worry about Sam, she couldn’t help but seek reassurance and comfort in Quinn’s arms. Or so she wanted to believe.

Finally the rec center came into sight, changing her focus. She’d chosen to check here first since it was open and there would be people around. She’d locked up Quinn’s house earlier, so the likelihood of finding Samantha there wasn’t as great.

Full of hope, Ari pulled into the parking lot, but ten minutes later she walked out frustrated and no closer to finding the teen. She’d questioned Al Wolf along with most of the kids. They’d all spread out to help her look, though none had seen or heard from Sam at all that day.

Instead of calling Quinn with no news, she decided to wait until she’d checked his house. Once she made the twenty-minute drive, she stepped out of the car once more, this time struck by the drop in temperature. In her hurry to find Sam, she’d left her jacket at the casino, and in her short sleeves, she had no protection against the cold. If Sam had come here, Ari hoped she’d been smart enough to bring a jacket of some kind.

She checked both the front and garage entrances to the house, but both remained locked and alarmed. Next she headed out back, where Dozer had a doghouse and a lead. Quinn had instructed her to leave the dog outside as long as the temperatures weren’t too cold.

The spotlights shone out back but it was still dark and hard to see anything besides shaded figures of trees. But sure enough, as soon as she rounded the back, she heard the dog’s distinctive bark.

She’d quickly learned that he answered to simple commands. “Dozer,” she called. “Come.”

The dog came toward her-at least she thought it was the dog, but with the dim lighting, she was uncertain. Especially since he seemed to have something large on his back. Ari blinked. She thought she knew what that something was, but the idea was so absurd she had to come closer to be certain.

She took two steps, then another. And then the vision became clear. Spank sat atop Dozer’s back as he walked, the monkey holding herself up with pride like the grand marshal at the circus.

Amusement warred with anger. Anger won out and Ari sucked in a deep breath, then counted to ten. When that didn’t work to calm her down, she let loose with a loud yell. “Samantha, get your runaway behind out here now!”

At the same time, Ari flipped open her cell phone and dialed Quinn, speaking to him only long enough to reassure him that Sam was okay and to promise that she’d return the girl to Elena and Nicholas before rejoining him at the hotel. For Quinn’s part, he’d have to wait his turn to yell and discipline Sam until he could afford a distraction from the case.

But Ari could take her turn now. She strode across the grass and called out Sam’s name again.

“I’m here, so you can quit screaming before you wake the neighbors,” Sam said in a sulky voice.

Ari reminded herself that Sam had had a hard time lately. That she’d had more upheaval than most adults endure in a lifetime and that in all probability she had what she thought was a good reason for this particular disappearing act. But the anger and fear still collided inside her, and only the fact that the young girl was whole and in one piece gave Ari a small measure of comfort.

She reached out and yanked Sam by the hand, pulling her into her arms and hugging her tight. “I was worried sick. Quinn was worried sick. And my parents are pacing the floor of the house, both worried sick!” Ari squeezed her tighter.

“Mmmmbrrgggggbbbb,” Sam mumbled into Ari’s shirt.

“What?”

Sam pushed and wriggled her way free. “I said I can’t breathe!”

Ari swallowed hard. “And I can’t think when I’m freezing.”

She grabbed Sam’s hand, then pulled the monkey into her arms and headed for the car. Once she’d settled Spank in the back, she and Sam sat in the front. Ari turned toward the young girl.

“Think you can get me one of those tight shirts?” Sam asked, pointing to Ari’s “Damon’s” tee.

“Tell me something. Do you not understand the concept of somebody worrying about you?” she asked, letting out a frustrated breath of air.

“Why should I? It’s not like anybody’s cared before,” Sam muttered. She wrapped her arms around herself and huddled into a ball.

Her profound words took some of the anger out of Ari, replacing it with a deep sense of sadness instead. When Zoe was presumed missing, the entire Costas household had turned themselves inside out with concern and fear. Even as they pushed on with life and business as usual, the love and concern for Zoe never diminished. Which, Ari figured, would land Zoe in deep, deep trouble when the truth was revealed.

But that wasn’t important right now. Sam didn’t believe anyone could care enough to worry. The sadness in that one statement was overwhelming.

“My parents called Quinn. They were frantic,” Ari said.

“Yeah, well, Felice and Aaron called Quinn, too. So did the family before that and the one before that. Even the guy with the paddle in the closet called the cops if a kid went missing. They’re just worried about themselves. If they lose a kid, they lose their monthly money from the state or they could even go to jail. So don’t try and say that it’s me they’re worried about.”

Ari opened her mouth, then closed it again. This child had been exposed to more than Ari could even imagine, and the sheer pain of her life hit Ariana hard. “Do you believe the same thing’s true for my parents? For Elena and Nicholas?”

Sam shrugged. “How should I know?”

Ari tipped her head to one side. “Good point. How should you know? Maybe you were testing them?” she asked softly. The idea, once it sprang to life, took hold and wouldn’t let go.

Sam didn’t answer. From the back seat, Spank clapped her hands, and a quick glance over her shoulder told Ari she was playing with her feet.

Well, as long as she was busy, Ari didn’t care. “Let me ask you something. You already decided Elena and Nicholas would call Quinn, since it’s what all foster parents do when a child runs away.” Ari gripped the steering wheel tight, trying to formulate her question in a way that made sense to a thirteen-year-old girl. “So what are you looking for? Best-case scenario, what can they do to prove themselves?” Ari asked, truly curious about Sam’s answer. If she even had one.

“I dunno.”

“What did the other parents do?”

“Nothing,” Sam said, squirming in her seat. “Maybe a missed meal or something. Well, not Felice. She just said ‘Thank goodness this will all be over soon.’ ”

Ari nodded. Suddenly, she understood. Undertaking the foster-care process wasn’t enough to convince Sam she was safe and loved. And for all the talk of adoption, the finalization was a long way off. Too long for a teenager who’d been shuffled around to believe it. For Elena and Nicholas to pass this test, they had to react. They needed to act like parents, Ari thought.

While turning the key in the ignition, she thought back to her childhood. Beyond the pranks and the cons, there was always plenty of love and understanding. Reprimanding, too, when the occasion warranted it. She hoped they could come through now, when Sam needed it most.

The ride home passed in silence, Ari not wanting to push Sam and unsure what to say anyway. It wasn’t until they pulled up in front of the Costas house that Sam turned toward Ari and spoke.

“What’s gonna happen to Spank?”

Absorbed in thinking about Sam’s life, Ari hadn’t given much thought to the monkey that night, and the question took her by surprise. “Well, I’ve been looking online and making some calls. Because she’s been well treated and her medical care is all up to date, she’s an easy placement. I just don’t want her in a zoo or someplace like that.” Ari shuddered.

“I don’t want her to go,” Sam said, stubbornness written all over her face.

With that particular trait, she’d fit into the family well, Ari thought. “Believe it or not, I’ve been taking that into consideration. What would you think about giving her to an animal trainer? Someone who lives close enough that you could visit, but also someone with good credentials and who treats animals with kindness, not punishment?”

“You’re asking me?” Sam said, her eyes wide and incredulous. As if her opinion had never counted for anything before.

“Well, seeing as how you love her, and considering you’re a member of this family, of course I’m asking you.” Ari reached out to rub Sam’s shoulder, but the girl jerked away and opened the car door instead.

“Spank’s a member of the family, too. Elena always said so and you’re giving her away. How do I know they won’t give me away next?” With those words, Sam jumped out of the car and ran for the front porch.

She’d revealed her biggest fear at last. One Ari knew her parents would find much more difficult to assuage than anything else on her mind.

Ari followed Sam into the house, then sat through the session between her parents and Sam, in which Elena and Nicholas laid down the laws in their home. Respect for one another was paramount. By taking off without letting anyone know, Sam had violated the rule. She’d worried the family and had to be punished.

Shockingly, Sam had taken the punishment well, reinforcing what Ari already thought-the young girl was looking for proof that Elena and Nicholas wouldn’t abandon her. By including her in the family rules and punishing her for disobeying, her parents had come through for her.

Thanks to that night’s revelations, Ari could suddenly relate to Sam more than ever. It wasn’t that Ari feared being sent away, but she had always feared being on the outside looking in. Being the twin nobody understood. Being the one who wasn’t a real member of the family because she was too different.

The difference was, Ari had had the support system all along. She’d just been too stubborn, too convinced her way was the best, too high and mighty in her ideals to consider anyone else’s way. And in doing so, she’d closed her family out of her life and out of her heart. And she’d shut herself off from fun, spontaneity, and anything that even remotely resembled Costas chaos. Like Sam, she’d pushed away those who loved her most-her parents, her sister, and now Quinn. But understanding didn’t guarantee that a lifetime’s worth of feelings and habits could change.

Or did it? Quinn let Ari into his room, unsure of why she was there. Sam was safe, and as far as Quinn was concerned, Ari had no reason to visit him now. He shut the door behind her, then leaned against the wall, arms folded, and waited. The ball was in her court.

“Sam’s grounded for the next month.” She shifted on her feet uncomfortably.

“She’s lucky it isn’t the rest of her life,” Quinn muttered.

He’d obviously relaxed her because Ari laughed. “That’ll come if she attempts a stunt like this again. My father’s a huge believer in respect for family, and making them worry the way she did…” Ari treated him to a mock shiver and his gaze was drawn to her breasts in her tight tee.

He groaned. Focusing on what he couldn’t have was pointless. He’d learned that early on in life. What was it about Ari that made him forget all his hard-learned lessons?

“Sam needed them to react and thank God they came through,” Ari continued, oblivious to his inner thoughts. “They acted in Sam’s best interest, not theirs. She must be the first kid in the world who welcomed punishment as a sign of love.”

Quinn nodded. Because he’d been raised in the same type of environment, he understood the teenager’s way of thinking. “If your parents can figure out how to keep her in line, more power to them. I really do think they’ll be good for her.”

He knew this in his gut because he, too, had looked for signs of being cared for. He’d just never found them. Not even with this woman who knew all the right things to say and do, but was too afraid to take the risk and be herself.

Ari shook her head. “For a teenager, Sam said something so profound, it floored me. She said that since my parents always called Spank part of the family and they were giving her away, what if they gave her away next?”

“So this was a test.”

Ari nodded. “One her other foster parents failed.”

He pushed off the wall and strode to the center of the room. “Then bless Elena and Nicholas.”

Ari followed him, getting into his space. “I was so scared before I found her. I’m still scared,” she admitted in a soft, husky voice.

She met his gaze with relief and more in her eyes. But he didn’t know what she wanted from him now. He only knew he sensed a turning point. An honest admission she hadn’t planned in advance and one he wasn’t about to let pass.

“Scared of what?” he asked, his hands clenched at his sides. All his self-control went into not touching her, not reaching out, not pulling her into his arms.

He refused to make that kind of move, which to him was the equivalent of a commitment, before he could trust her more.

“I was worried that something would happen to you during this whole… Damon mess,” she whispered, waving her hand around the room, obviously not convinced she could trust that the place had been debugged.

Smart girl, he thought, respecting her intelligence. But it was her heart he was more interested in at the moment.

He stepped closer, closing the already small space between them. “Why?” he asked, prepared to push her hard. “Why are you so worried about me?”

His heart beat a rapid beat inside his chest, and the fear she spoke about threatened to suffocate him. Inside he was still a little boy craving love and acceptance. He’d never allowed himself to expect it, never trusted another human being to give it unconditionally, without reservation. And most of all, he’d never believed anyone would ever invest in Quinn Donovan for the long haul. But despite his well-built walls, Ari had breached them, and he hoped like hell she didn’t let him down now.

She stared at him defiantly, obviously fighting some inner turmoil she kept well hidden. “Because I care about you and you damn well know it,” she said, then clamped her jaw shut tight. Her eyes opened wide as she realized what she’d just admitted.

Quinn would have liked more. But for now it was enough. He pulled her against him and closed his mouth over hers.

She didn’t argue, didn’t fight her feelings; instead he felt the moment she relaxed and gave in to what her body wanted. And Quinn was smart enough to know he only had this one time to convince her she couldn’t leave him behind and go on with her life as if they had never been.

• • •

Ari awoke with a renewed spirit. Quinn slept beside her and she found comfort in his body heat and the knowledge that she lay safe in his bed. So much had seemed to tilt and shift in such a short time. She had Sam to thank for testing and proving the power of her family’s love. Though Ari had a long way to go before she understood them completely, her heart was now open to trying harder.

But most importantly, she had Quinn to thank for expressing a love of an entirely different kind. Not in words but in gestures and emotions and in a distinctive way she couldn’t mistake. He’d made love to her, so she couldn’t help but feel the connection between them. One she desperately wanted to believe in.

But fears and questions remained. She couldn’t forget how easily he’d blended in and accepted her family. A family she wasn’t anything like. Yet Quinn had tried to bring out that more outgoing, sexy, and fun woman he called Ari. But what of Professor Costas? Even without the suits, Ariana was still a part of her personality. Her soul. Could Quinn accept all of her?

Or once again would she be the outsider with a broken heart, longing for something she didn’t understand and couldn’t have?

The sound of her cell phone pulled her away from her thoughts. She leaned over and pulled it out of her purse, hoping not to wake Quinn. “Hello?” she asked softly.

“Good morning, Ariana. It’s Bill Riley,” said a deep, familiar voice.

“Well, hello yourself,” Ari said to the chairman of the Psychology Department at her school. Despite her thoughts, she wasn’t ready to talk to anyone from Vermont. His voice brought stressful tension she didn’t welcome.

“I called your parents’ house. I’m so sorry to hear there’s been no word on your twin. It’s dreadful, it really is.”

“Thank you,” she murmured, the guilt rising in her chest.

“I’m calling because I need to know if and when you plan on returning. Not only because we all miss you, but because I need to work on your replacement’s schedule. Of course I understand it’s a difficult decision and I’m sorry to put you on the spot,” he said with his characteristic mix of academia and caring.

Ari swallowed hard. She knew she’d have to face this decision sometime. “I need some more time here.” She pushed herself up in bed and found Quinn staring at her, his expression closed but curiosity evident in his compelling gaze.

“But you’ll finish the semester yourself? The kids miss you and there’s nobody who teaches with the same flair.”

Ari licked her suddenly dry lips. Since when did Professor Costas, in her dark suits and pulled-back hair, do anything with flair? “Of course I’ll be back,” she said, eager to end this conversation.

When she had come home, she’d planned on returning to Vermont as soon as she found her sister. Now the thought of leaving her family-and Quinn-behind wasn’t as appealing. “I’ll call you when I know more,” she promised Bill. “Probably the middle of next week.”

By then Zoe would have returned and she would have had more time with her family. Deciding about her permanent future would have to wait until she was more sure herself of where she wanted to be. Where she was welcome and wanted-as the complete combination of both Ari and Ariana, she thought.

Quinn watched as Ari turned off the phone and replaced it in her purse by the side of the bed. He’d awakened to the sweet sound of her voice, remembered the intimacy between them last night, and then had his heated memories and hopes shattered by her words. Of course I’ll be back, she’d said. He had no doubt she was talking about Vermont.

Which meant she’d be leaving again. Just like he thought. Just like he should have known all along. Didn’t everybody in his life walk sooner or later?

“Who was that?” he asked, his voice sounding calmer than he felt.

“Bill Riley. He heads the Psych Department at the university.” Ari brushed her hair out of her eyes.

He tried not to be affected by her full lips and disheveled, I-just-had-sex look, but failed. “Must be important for him to call so early.”

She glanced at the clock and laughed. “It’s nearly eleven. Actually it was important. He’s got a colleague subbing for me and he wanted to know how long I’d be gone so he could arrange the schedule.”

“And you told him you’d be back.” Needing distance, he rose from the bed.

“Well, I have to finish the semester…” Her voice trailed off.

“Of course you do. Just like I have to be downstairs.” So far this case was falling into place, but he never assumed anything was complete until it was time to walk away.

Being back on the job now would give him something to focus on other than the fact that he’d nearly let himself be suckered into believing he had a future with Ariana.

She didn’t say a word when, seconds later, he closed himself in the bathroom for a quick shower, all the while instructing himself to ignore the confused expression on her face and the wounded look in her eyes.

He was the one who’d taken a sucker punch this morning, not her. He’d put everything on the line for a woman and a future, in an ultimate gamble he was obviously destined to lose.

• • •

Alone in Quinn’s hotel room, Ari sat stunned by Quinn’s abrupt shift in mood from when they’d gone to bed last night to when they’d woken up this morning. She supposed he was shaken by her phone conversation, but so was she. When Ari was with Quinn, Vermont was the last thing on her mind, and that was a notion she knew she had to explore further. But first he had to finish this situation with Damon, just as Ari had unresolved family issues waiting for her when her sister came home.

Which reminded her, she needed to contact the man who was interested in taking Spank. Though she’d found him via the Internet, she’d called an old friend from high school who’d become a private investigator and he’d looked into the man’s background. Michael Peters was an animal trainer who specialized in monkeys. He was based in New Jersey and met all the requirements for owning an exotic pet-which meant he met most of Ari’s requirements. He lived close enough that Sam could visit. His resumé even said he’d owned the monkey on the television show Friends before moving from L.A. If his references checked out, he’d make a good parent for Spank, and Ari felt responsible not just for Sam’s emotional well-being but also for the monkey’s future.

She dug through her purse but couldn’t find the page she’d printed with Peters’s information. When, after her shower, she looked for her lip gloss and couldn’t find that either, she remembered dropping her purse in Damon’s office, and headed downstairs to reclaim her things. After the chilly reception this morning, she only hoped she didn’t run into Quinn.