Worth the fight

Chapter 8

Elle

“Sal’s deli just called to see how Leonard was feeling. Business must be down with him out for almost a week.” Regina says with a smile as I hand her the menu for our lunch order.

“He’s probably just afraid we’ll sue him for damages after they’ve fed him those deadly sausage and peppers heroes every day for all these years. You know how much fat and cholesterol are in those things?”

“You know who doesn’t look like he eats any fat at all?” Regina wiggles her eyebrows suggestively and speaks in her best sex kitten voice.

“Nice segway. I think you can turn any conversation into something about Nico Hunter lately. You should’ve been a lawyer.” I laugh at Regina’s latest obsession.

“Do you blame me for being smitten?” Smitten, who uses the word smitten?

I sigh, thinking back to our kiss last night. No, I certainly don’t blame Regina for being smitten. I think I agreed to have dinner with Nico so I could find something wrong with him and get his lethal smile out of my head. But last night only made things worse. I didn’t find a single thing to help me push my wayward thoughts out of my head. In fact, I actually found things that made it harder to stop thinking about him.

“Are you going to tell me about your date or do I need to bring you into the conference room for a formal deposition?”

“How come you never ask about my dates with William, Regina?”

“Because I don’t want to be bored.”

“Regina!” I raise my voice chastising her.

“What?” She smiles at me knowing I’m not really mad. It’s an odd friendship, but the part of my relationship with Regina that I value most is that she is so honest when we talk.

“What makes you think my dates with William are boring?”

“Aren’t they?” Regina grins knowingly.

“William is a nice guy.”

“I didn’t say he wasn’t.”

It’s my turn to sigh. Regina is right. My dates with William are boring. Nice, comfortable, but boring. But it’s good for me. I don’t need any emotional rollercoasters, I’ve had enough of that to last a lifetime.

I don’t leave the office till after ten. I’m handling my caseload and helping out with Leonard’s while he’s still out. I keep myself busy all afternoon and late into the evening after my lunch with Regina. I don’t want to think about Nico. He isn’t what I need. I should be thinking about William. He’s the type of man I should be with. He’s stable, honest, and hard working. He’s good for me and he cares about me. So why are thoughts of Nico keeping me awake? I toss and turn for hours until I’m finally exhausted enough to slip into dreamland.

I wake in the morning to screaming. I’m petrified. Unable to move at the harrowing sound. It takes me almost a full minute to realize that I am the one making the sound. I’m screaming and I can’t stop. The dream is back. It’s not really a dream, it’s a nightmare. Although nightmares are a figment of a person’s imagination, so I guess what I just woke up to wasn’t a nightmare…it was reality. My reality. My memory. My past.

It’s been six years since I woke to the torment that haunted my sleep for as many years. I can’t believe it’s starting again. It took me years to make them go away.

I always wake at the same place in the nightmare. His fist connects with her head and she stumbles back and hits the refrigerator. Hard. Her eyes roll into the back of her head as her body slides down in slow motion. He’s really hurt her this time and it doesn’t look like he’s done with her yet. He leans down, his fist pulled back, ready to pummel her lifeless body. A gunshot blasts. It’s so loud it hurts my head. The sound leaves a high-pitch ringing in my ears. It makes me reach up and cover them. I never knew sound could hurt. I feel like my ears are bleeding.

My hands are always covering my ears when I come to. The sound is so real that it wakes me. Every time is as real as the first time. The vision never dulls.