A Man to Call My Own

Chapter 44

THERE WAS SIMPLY NO way that Marian would consider riding a horse back to the Twisting Barb until all of her saddle sores went away. Neither a wagon, nor a carriage, if Spencer was so inclined to lend his again, would do either. Both were just too bumpy on dirt roads. So she wasn't ready to return the next day when Kathleen was planning to head home.

Her aunt agreed and arranged for her to stay with the preacher and his family. There was no question about staying with her newly married sister, even if Amanda hadn't been living over a saloon.

Marian had a lot of shopping to do in Trenton, as well as several appointments with a seamstress, for a complete new wardrobe. She still had enough of her travel money to pay for most of what she needed, though her aunt suggested that she wait before actually spending any of it until they heard from the lawyer.

Kathleen had sent off a telegram to Albert Bridges, telling him that more funds were needed for necessities for Marian, as well as informing him of Amanda's marriage. Marian couldn't obtain the bulk of her inheritance yet, but it was available to fund normal living expenses for her. Kathleen wasn't expected to pay for all of her needs.

She actually had fun shopping and picking out designs and pretty materials for clothes. It had been too long since she'd ordered anything other than mundane and ugly garments, and every time she'd done so, she'd felt deprived, resentful, and especially dispirited. It had all been her own doing, necessary in her mind, but certainly no fun. Finally, those days were over.

Kathleen was going to return to collect her the following weekend. The lawyer's reply, when it came in, was to be delivered to Marian first, so she would know when the funds had been transferred to the bank in Trenton. Until then, she had to be frugal, so she merely made her choices, telling the seamstress to hold off on starting anything until the money arrived to pay for it.

She managed to avoid running into Amanda that week in town. Her sister was pretty much keeping to her new home, though Marian had heard she was enjoying herself in the evenings in the saloon, acting somewhat as a hostess for the establishment. Whether Amanda and Spencer were getting along, she had no idea, and despite her curiosity, she wouldn't pay Amanda a visit to find out.

Not that Amanda would admit to any problems if she had any. If anything, she'd pretend that the marriage was all her idea and she was quite happy with it. There had been one report that made the gossip rounds, of Spencer running down the stairs with a vase thrown after him, and that he'd avoided his wife for the rest of that day. But that had been an isolated incident. For the most part, they were putting a good face on their shotgun marriage.

Albert Bridges's reply was late in arriving. Marian wasn't concerned though. He could have been out of town and not even received Kathleen's telegram yet. But by Friday there still wasn't any word, and Kathleen would arrive the next day to take Marian back to the ranch, with nothing really having been accomplished during her week in town other than the purchase of some new painting supplies and a few blouses she'd bought ready-made. Amanda was probably getting impatient as well. Until Albert acknowledged her marriage, he wouldn't be releasing her inheritance.

His letter arrived about thirty minutes before Kathleen was due on Saturday. It wasn't expected. For it to be there by then, delivered by normal post, it would have had to be sent prior to Kathleen's telegram to him. And the envelope was bulky, so it probably wasn't just a short note to find out how the girls were getting on.

Marian's curiosity was pricked, but the letter was addressed to Kathleen, so she had no right to open it. It was probably just some legal formality or forms to sign, nothing to get anxious over. She put it out of her mind and went about gathering up her belongings in the preacher's house because she'd be spending the night in the hotel again with her aunt.

Kathleen arrived within the hour that she'd been expected. With her had come most of her ranch hands for their Saturday night on the town. Chad rode in as well with some of the Kinkaid cowboys for the same reason. Marian had hoped she wouldn't see him again now that he was no longer working for her aunt. It wasn't that she couldn't tolerate his presence, she just didn't want to. And she was afraid that he might turn his attention to her, now that Amanda was unavailable. She really didn't want to have to deal with that, or with explaining why she didn't want him now. She didn't. She really didn't.

She wanted a man to call her own, yes, but she didn't want to be any man's second choice. It still hurt, that Amanda had won in the end. It still hurt, that Chad didn't even know he'd made love to her.

He'd never know now, unless Amanda bothered to fess up to her lies, which was highly doubtful. Marian certainly wasn't going to tell him at this point. She might have made an attempt to tell him the truth if he had been forced to marry Amanda, but now that that was no longer an issue, there was no reason to, and a lot of reasons not to. Mainly, she didn't want him thinking he would now be obligated to marry her instead, nor her aunt holding yet another shotgun wedding, because she certainly wouldn't agree to one.

"I heard there was no telegraphed reply," Kathleen said when she came by the preacher's house to pick Marian up. "Whole town knows by now, since Eddy yelled it at me as I was walking down the street."

Marian grinned. It probably was hard to keep personal business personal in such a friendly town, where messages got passed along with shouts, and the latest news and gossip could be found in just about every store and saloon.

"That's probably why this got delivered to me a while ago," Marian replied as she handed the letter over. "Since most of the town already knew you were riding in today."

"Yes," Kathleen agreed, and merely glanced at the letter before she stuck it in her saddlebag. "They usually do keep my mail in town if it arrives right before the weekend, then deliver it on Monday if I don't show up. You ready, sweetie? Chad has offered us the use of the Kinkaid town house for the night. He stopped there to let the staff know."

Was she ready to sleep in his house or even see him again? No. But she merely nodded and said her goodbyes to the family she'd spent the week with.

She rode double with her aunt to the Kinkaid house, which was at the opposite end of town. Kathleen dropped her off at the seamstress's, though, with the advice to go ahead and get a few of her selections started, and to meet her in trie general store next door when she was done.

She found Kathleen on one of the benches outside the store, reading Alberts letter. She didn't interrupt, just sat down beside her and smiled at the people who passed by tipping their hats. It really was a very friendly town, predominantly male in population, where everyone knew everyone else, so any strangers were easily identified.

Although there wasn't an extreme shortage of women, those who lived there were mostly all married already. Which might be why Marian had received four proposals of marriage during her short stay there, and nine other men had shown up at the preacher's house with one excuse or another to pass a little time with her.

It would be much easier than she'd thought to find a husband here. She just had no present desire to start looking. Which was his fault. All of the emotions she shouldn't currently be experiencing were his fault. And she couldn't seem to shake the anger, or the disappointment. Dammit.

When she finally glanced at her aunt again, it was to find her leaning her head back against the building with her eyes closed. She didn't really look tired, just like she didn't want to deal with whatever she'd just read.

"Is something wrong?" Marian asked hesitantly.

"Depends on how you look at it. From a Texan's point of view, not really. Folks get along fine out here without much money, and no one expects a woman to have any anyway. Men don't marry a woman here for her fortune."

Marian went very still. "There's a problem with my father's estate, isn't there?"

Kathleen sighed as she opened her eyes. She was grimacing as she glanced at Marian. "You could say that. Seems he died broke."