Kirkland Revels

Chapter 6

There is some special quality which develops in a woman who is to have a child; already the fierce instinct is with her. She will protect that child with all the power of which she is capable and, as her determination to do so increases, so it seems does that power.

I awoke next morning refreshed after the unbroken sleep which the doctor’s sedative had given me. The events of the previous day came rushing back to my mind, and even then I felt as though I were at the entrance of a dark tunnel it would be disastrous for me to enter, but into which I might be swept by the bitter blast of ill-fortune.

But the child was there, reminding me of its existence. Where I went there must the child go; what happened to me must have its effect on the child. I was going to fight this thing which was threatening to destroy me—not only for myself but for the sake of one who was more precious to me.

When Mary-Jane came in with my breakfast she did not see that anything was different, and I felt that was my first triumph. I had been terrified that I should be unable to hide the fear which had almost prostrated me on the previous day ” It’s a grand morning, madam,” she said.

” Is it, Mary Jane

” A bit of a wind still, but any road t’sun’s shining.”

” I’m glad.”

I half closed my eyes and she went out. I found it difficult to eat, but I managed a little. The sun sent a feeble ray on to the bed and it cheered me; I thought it was symbolic. The sun is always there, I reminded myself, only the clouds get in between. There’s always a way of dealing with every problem, only ignorance gets in the way.

I wanted to think very clearly. I knew in my heart that what I had seen had been with my eyes, not with my imagination. Inscrutable as it seemed, there was an explanation somewhere.

Damaris was clearly involved in the plot against me; and what more reasonable than that she should be, for if Luke wished to frighten me into giving birth to a stillborn child, and Damaris was to be his wife, it was surely reasonable enough to suppose that she would work with him.

But it was possible that these two young people could plot so diabolical a murder, for murder it would be even though the child had not come into the world.

I tried to review the situation clearly and work out what must be done.

The first thing that occurred to me was that I might go back to my father’s house. I rejected that idea almost as soon as it came. I should have to give a reason- l should have to say: ” Someone at the Revels is trying to drive me to the brink of madness. Therefore I am running away.” I felt that it Would be an admission of my fear, and if, for one moment, I accepted the view that I was suffering from hallucinations, I had taken the first steps on that road along which someone here was trying to force me.

I did not think at this time I could endure the solemnity, the morbid atmosphere of my father’s house.

I had made my decision: I could never know peace of mind again until I had solved this mystery. It was therefore not something from which I could run away. I was going to intensify my search for my persecutor.

I owed it to myself and to my child.

I must now make a practical plan, and I decided that I would go to Hagar and take her into my confidence. I should have preferred to act alone, but that was impossible because my first step, I had decided, must be to go to Worstwhistle and confirm Dr. Smith’s words.

I could not ask anyone at the Revels to drive me there so I must go to Hagar. | When I had bathed and dressed I set out immediately for |

Kelly Grange. It was about half past ten when I arrived, and I went straight to Hagar and told her what the doctor had told me.

She listened gravely and when I had finished she said:

Simon shall take you to that place immediately. I think with you that should be the first step. “

She rang for Dawson and told her to send Simon to us at once.

Remembering my suspicions of Simon I was a little anxious, but I realised that I had to get to Worstwhistle even if it did mean taking a chance; and as soon as he entered the room my suspicions vanished, and I was ashamed that I had ever entertained them. That was the effect he was beginning to have on me.

Hagar told him what had happened. He looked astonished and then he said: ” Well, we’d better get over to Worstwhistle right away.”

” I will send someone over to the Revels to tell them that you are taking luncheon with me,” said Hagar; and I was glad she had thought of that because I should have aroused their curiosity if I had not returned.

Fifteen minutes later Simon was driving the trap, with me sitting beside him, along the road to Worstwhistle. We did not speak much during that journey; and I was grateful to him for falling in with my mood. I could think of nothing but the interview before me which was going to mean so much to me. I kept remembering my father’s absences from home and the sadness which always seemed to surround him; and I could not help believing that there was truth in what the doctor had told me.

It was about midday when we came to Worstwhistle a grey stone building which to my mind resembled nothing so much as a prison. It was a prison, I told myself stone walls within which the afflicted lived out their clouded lives. Was it possible that my own mother was among those sad in habitants, and that there was a plot afoot to make me a prisoner here?

I was determined that should never be.

Surrounding the building was a high wall and when we drew up at the heavy wrought-iron gates, a porter came out of the lodge and asked our business.

Simon told him authoritatively that he wished to see the Principal of the establishment.

“You have an appointment with him, sir?”

” It’s of the utmost importance,” Simon replied and threw the man a coin.

Whether it was the money or Simon’s manner, I was not sure, but the gates were opened to us and we drove along a gravel drive to the main building.

A man in livery emerged as we approached and Simon dismounted and helped me down.

” Who’ll hold the horse?” he asked.

The porter shouted and a boy appeared. He held the horse while we, with the man in livery, went towards the porch.

” Will you tell the Principal that we wish to see him immediately on a matter of great urgency?”

Again I was grateful for that authoritative arrogance which resulted in immediate obedience.

We were led through the porch into a stone-flagged hall in which a fire was burning; but it was not enough to warm the place, and I felt the chill. But perhaps it was a spiritual rather than a physical chill.

I was shivering. Simon must have noticed this for he took my arm and I found comfort in that gesture.

” Please to sit in here, sir,” said the porter; and he opened a door on our right to disclose a high-ceilinged room with whitewashed walls, a heavy table, and a few chairs.

“Your name, sir?”

” This is Mrs. Rookwell of Kirkland Revels, and I am Mr. Redvers.”

” You say you had an appointment, sir?” '

” I did not say so.”

” It’s usual to make one, sir.”

” We are pressed for time and, as I said, the matter is urgent. Pray go and tell the Principal that we are here.”

The porter retired, and when he was gone Simon smiled at me.

” Anyone would think we were trying to see the Queen.” Then his face softened into a tenderness which I had never seen him give to anyone before except perhaps Hagar. ” Cheer up,” he said, ” even if it’s true, it’s not the end of the world, you know.”

” I’m glad you came with me, I hadn’t meant to say that but the words slipped out.

He took my hand and pressed it firmly. It was a gesture which meant that we were not foolish, hysterical people and should be able to take the calm view.

I walked away from him because I did not trust my emotions. I went to the window and looked out, and I thought of the people who were held captive here. This was their little world. They looked out on the gardens and the moor beyond if they were allowed to look out of windows and this was all they knew of life. Some had been here for years . seventeen years. But perhaps they were kept shut away.

Perhaps they did not even see the gardens and the moor.

It seemed that we waited a very long time before the porter returned.

Then he said: ” Come this way, will you, please.”

As we followed him up a flight of stairs, and along a corridor, I caught a glimpse of barred windows and shivered. So like a prison, I thought.

Then the porter rapped on a door on which the word ” Superintendent” had been painted. A voice said ” Come in” ; and Simon, taking my arm, drew me into the room with him. The whitewashed walls were bare; the oilcloth polished to danger point; and it was a cold and cheerless room; at a desk a man with a tired grey face and a resentful look in his eyes because, I presumed, we had dared invade his privacy without an appointment.

” Pray sit down,” he said, when the porter had left us. ” Am I to understand that your business is urgent?”

” It is of the utmost urgency to us,” said Simon. I spoke then. ” It was good of you to see us. I am Mrs. Rockwell, but before my marriage I was Catherine Corder.”

” Oh!” The gleam of understanding which came into hu face was a blow which shattered my hopes. I said: “You have a patient here of that name?”

” Yes, that is so.”

I looked at Simon and, try as I might, I could not speak because my tongue had become parched, my throat constricted

” The point is,” went on Simon, ” Mrs. Rockwell has only very recently heard that a Catherine Corder may be here. She has reason to believe that this may be her mother. She has always been under the impression that her mother died when she was very young. Naturally she wishes to know whether the Catherine Corder in this establishment is her mother.”

” The information we have about our patients is confidential as you will appreciate.”

” We do appreciate that,” said Simon. ” But in the case of very close relatives would you not be prepared to give the information which was asked?”

” It would first be necessary to prove the relationship.” I burst out:

“Before my marriage my name was Catherine Corder. My father is Mervyn Corder of Glen House, Glen- green, near Harrogate.

Please tell me whether the patient you have here, who bears the same name as myself, is my mother. “

The Superintendent hesitated; then he said: “I can tell you nothing except that we have a patient here of that name. It is not such an unusual name. Surely your father would supply the information you are seeking from me?”

I looked at Simon, who said: ” I should have thought that such a close relation had a right to know.”

” As I said, the relationship would first have to be proved. I do not think I could betray the trust placed in me by my patient’s relations.”

” Tell me,” I cried wildly, ” does her husband come to visit her regularly each month?”

” Many of our patients’ relatives visit them regularly.” He surveyed us coldly and I could see that he was adamant. Simon was exasperated, but he could not move the Superintendent ” Could I see … ?” I began.

But the Superintendent held up his hand in horror.

“Certainly not,” he said sharply.

“That would be quite impossible.”

Simon looked at me helplessly. ” There’s only one thing | to do,” he said. ” You must write to your father.”

” I think you are right in that,” said the Superintendent, rising to imply that he had given us enough of his time. ” Our patient has been placed here by her husband, but if he gives you permission to see her we should raise no objection, providing of course, that she is well enough to receive you when : you come. That is all the help I can give you. ” :

He pulled the bell and the porter reappeared. We were led out. to the waiting trap.

I felt frustrated as we drove away. Simon did not speak until he had put about a mile between us and the institution: :

Then he pulled up. We were in a lane over which the trees would make an arch of green in the summer; now we could see the blue-grey sky between the black branches, and the clouds being chased across it by the keen wind.

I did not feel the wind; nor, I imagine, did Simon.

He turned to me and slid his arm behind me, although not touching me.

” You’re depressed by all this,” he said.

” Do you wonder?”

” It wasn’t altogether illuminating, was it?”

” Illuminating enough. They have a Catherine Corder there. He did tell us that.”

” She may not be connected with you.”

” I think it is too much of a coincidence if she should not be. I haven’t told you, have I, that my father used to disappear at regular intervals. We did not know where he went. I used to think that he went visiting some woman …” I laughed harshly. ” I know now that he went to Worstwhistle.”

“Can you be so sure?”

“Something tells me it is so. Dr. Smith, remember, has seen her records and he has told me that she is my mother.”

Simon was silent for a few seconds and then he said: ” It’s not like you, Catherine, to despair.”

I noticed that he had dropped the Mrs. and I knew intuitively that that was a sign of the change in our relation- I ship. ,” ” Would you not feel like despair if all this were happening to you? “

” The best way to fight something that frightens you is to go right up to it and look it in the face.”

” I am doing that.”

” Well, what is the worst that could happen?”

That another Catherine Carder should be taken to that place. That her child should be born there. “

“We’ll not let it happen. Nobody could do that, could they?”

” Could they not? If the doctor was convinced that it was the best place for me?”

” It’s all such nonsense. I never knew anyone so sane. You’re as sane as I am.”

I turned to him and said vehemently: ” I am, Simon, I am.”

He took my hands and, to my astonishment—for I had not until this moment thought him capable of such a gesture towards me—he kissed them, and I could feel the fervour of those kisses through my gloves.

Then he pressed my hand so tightly that I winced at the pain of his grip.

” I’m with you in this,” he said.

I knew a moment of great happiness. I felt the strength of him flowing into my body, and I was grateful, so grateful that I wondered whether such gratitude must be love.

” Do you mean it?”

” Heart and soul,” he answered. ” Nobody shall take you where you don’t want to go.”

” The way things have been going alarms me, Simon. I’m looking this right in the face, as you said. And I am frightened. I thought I should fight it better by pretending not to be afraid, but pretence isn’t going to help, is it? Ever since I saw the monk the first time, life has changed for me. I’ve been like a different person … a frightened person. I now know that all the time I’ve been wondering what is going to happen next. It has made me nervous … different, Simon, different.”

” Anyone would feel so. There’s nothing strange about that.”

“You don’t believe in ghosts, Simon, do you? If people say they see a ghost, you think they’re lying or that they’ve imagined they saw something.”

” I don’t think that about you.”

” Then you can only think that inside the monk’s robe was a real person.”

” Yes, I think that.”

“Then I must tell you all the truth. Nothing must be held back.” And I told him of the apparition I had seen in the Abbey when Damaris was with me, and how she had declared there had been nothing there. ” I think that was the worst moment of all because then I began to doubt myself.”

” We must assume that Damaris knows what’s going on; she must be a party to the plot. “

” I am sure Luke wants to marry her, but does she want to marry Luke?”

” Perhaps she wants to marry the Revels,” said Simon;

” and she couldn’t do that, could she, unless the place was Luke’s.”

” You’re helping me … you’re helping me a lot.”

” It’s what I want to do more than anything.”

” How can I thank you!”

His arm was round me now ; he drew me to him and kissed me lightly on the cheek. I could feel his cold face pressed against mine for a few seconds and the warmth which enveloped me surprised me.

” It is strange that I should look to you for comfort.”

” Not at all strange. We’re two of a kind.”

” Oh yes, you admire my common sense. You thought it was very clever of me to marry Gabriel … for his possessions.”

” So you remember that.”

” It is not the sort of thing one is likely to forget. I suppose you would not blame whoever it is who wants to drive me mad … if they succeed.”

” I’d wring his neck … if I could find him.”

” Then your attitude has changed.”

” Not in the least. I didn’t admire you for, as I thought, marrying Gabriel for what he could give you. I admired you for your sharp wits and your courage … which I knew were there.”

” I am not being very courageous now.”

” You are going to be.”

” I must be, it seems, if I am to retain your good opinion.”

He was pleased by the lightness which had crept into our conversation; as for myself I was surprised that, with the burden of suspicion that was lying heavily upon me, I could indulge in it; but it did me good that much I knew.

” Yes,” he repeated, ” you are going to be. And I am here to help you.”

” Thank you, Simon.”

He looked at me intently for a few seconds and I read in his looks the knowledge which he wished me to share. He and I were about to embark on a new relationship; it was an exciting one; it would be one of stimulation to us both, of fierce disagreements and splendid accord.

We were two of a kind. He had recognised that, as I did now. I knew what he was telling me, and I wanted to listen so much.

I went on: ” There have been times when I did not know whom I could trust.”

” You will trust me,” he said.

” It sounds like a command.” I smiled. ” It often does when you make a statement.”

” That is a command.”

” And you think you have a right to command me?”

” Yes … in view of … everything, I do.”

I did not want to move from this spot. I felt as though I had found a peaceful place in which to rest and be happy. Behind me lay that grim institution with its dark secrets; ahead of me the Revels and, somewhere not far distant, was my father’s house. But here I was suspended between threats of disaster, and here I wanted to stay.

I believed in that moment that I was in love with Simon Redvers and he with me. It was a strange conclusion to arrive at at such a time in a cold country lane.

It did not seem strange to me that these strong emotions I felt were for Simon Redvers. In some way he reminded me of Gabriel; he was Gabriel without his weakness. When I was with Simon I understood what had made me hurry into that marriage with Gabriel. I had seen something to love and protect there, and that was what I needed; I had loved him in a way, for there are many kinds of love. Pity is love, I thought; the need to protect is love. But there was a deep and passionate love of which I knew nothing; I knew, though, that to love completely one must know every phase of loving, and that was the real adventure, to widen one’s emotions, to discover their depths as the years passed.

But I was a long way from such an adventure. There was so much to be lived through first. I had to be delivered of a child and of my fear.

And at this moment I could not peer very far into the mist which hid the future.

But Simon was with me, and such a thought, even at this time, could set my senses singing.

” Very well,” I said, ” I am ready to listen to your commands.”

“Ready then. The first thing we’re going to do is drive to an inn a mile along this road. There we are going to eat,” ” I couldn’t eat.”

” You have forgotten that you suggested I should command

” But the thought of food revolts me.”

” There is a quiet little room just off the inn parlour where the host serves his special guests. I am always a special guest. His speciality is a pudding made with steak and mushrooms. It has to be tasted to be believed. We’ll have a claret which he will bring from his cellar especially for us. I defy you to resist when you smell the aroma of mine host’s speciality.”

” I will come with you and watch you enjoy it.”

He took my hand again, brought it half-way to his lips, then pressed it and smiled at me.

It was strange that I could be almost happy as we bowled along that road with the wind in our faces and the wintry sun trying to smile at us; but I was.

I even ate a little of the special pudding; and the claret warmed me.

Simon was practical as he always would be.

” Your next step,” he said, ” is to write to your father. You must ask him for the truth. But mind you, whatever the truth, we are not going to be downhearted.”

” But suppose that is really my mother in that place?”

” Well, suppose it is.”

” Let’s look at it clearly, Simon. My mother in that place … and myself, according to some, seeing visions, doing strange things.”

” We don’t believe in the visions, do we?” he said gently.

” I don’t. And how can I thank you and your grandmother for supporting me in this?”

“You don’t have to thank us for having an opinion, Catherine. If we could only catch the monk in the act, that is all we should need to prove our case. It’s my opinion that he’s found some place in which to hide himself. We must try to discover it. Next week the Christmas festivities will begin, and my grandmother and I will spend two nights in the house. That may give us a chance to discover something.”

” I wish it were this week.”

” It will soon come.”

” And if they try anything in the meantime … ?”

He was silent for a few seconds, then he said: ” If you should see the monk again, tell no one. I believe he wants you to talk of what you have seen, but do not give him that satisfaction. Continue to lock your doors at night so that you can’t be startled from your sleep. You haven’t been. have you, since you began to lock them? I think that’s significant. In the meantime you will hear from your father—and you are not going to be distressed, whatever he has to tell you. I never did believe that we relied on our ancestors for what we are. We are in command of our own fates.”

” I’ll remember that, Simon.”

” Yes, do remember it. What we are and what we become is in our own hands. Think of it like this: what is the population of England to-day? Some ten times what it was a few hundred years ago. Has it struck you that if we could trace our ancestors far back enough we must all be related in some way with each other. In all our families there have very likely been rogues and saints, madmen and geniuses.

No, Catherine, each of us is an individual with his—or her—own life in his hands. “

” You are philosophical,” I said. ” I had never thought that. I had thought you practical in the extreme, excelling in good, straightforward common sense, but without imagination and therefore without sympathy.”

” That’s the mask I wear. We all wear them, don’t we? I’m tough; I’m shrewd; I’m a blunt man who doesn’t mince his words. That’s the outward me. Not a very attractive personality, you’ll agree, as you did on our first meeting Brash, determined that no one shall get the better of him-therefore he’s going to start trying to get the better of everyone else. That’s part of me … I don’t deny it. I’m all of that. But perhaps I’m something else besides. A man’s made up of many parts….” He looked at me slyly. ” And a woman is probably more complex still.”

” Please go on,” I said. ” You’re doing so much for me.”

” All right. When you go back to the Revels how are you going to feel?”

” I don’t know, except that it won’t be so good as I feel here.”

“No,” he said. You’re going to be afraid. You’re going to hurry up the stairs, turning to see if you are being pursued; you’re going to throw open the door of your room, and you’re going to look anxiously about you to see if he’s there. Then you’re going to lock him out, but you won’t lock out your fear completely, because it’s there in your mind and with the darkness your fear will grow stronger.

”

” You are right, of course.”

He leaned across the table and took my hand.

” Catherine, there is nothing to fear. There is never any thing to fear. Fear is like a cage which prevents our escaping, but we make the bars of the cage ourselves. We see them as strong iron bars . unbreakable. They are not so, Catherine. We ourselves have the power to take those bars in our hands and break them. They can be strong; they can be flimsy; for we ourselves have made them what they are. “

” You are telling me / have nothing to fear !”

“Nothing has really harmed you, has it. You have only been frightened.”

” How can I know that it never will?”

” The motive, at least, is becoming clear to us. This person-or persons—is seeking to unnerve you. Your life is not in danger. If you were to die violently, following Gabriel, suspicions would certainly be aroused. No, it is the child who is threatened. This person’s motive is to reduce you to such a state of fear that your chances of producing a healthy child are endangered. In view of Gabriel’s death, it has to appear I natural.” I ” And Gabriel’s death”

I began. “I am beginning to think that was the first act in the drama.”

” And Friday?” I murmured, remembering then the night before Gabriel’s death, when Friday had behaved strangely and insisted on going into the corridor. I told Simon of this. ” There was someone there.

Waiting. But for Friday it might have been that night. And then Friday disappeared. “

He put his hand over mine. ” We don’t know how it happened,” he said.

” Let us concern ourselves with what lies ahead of us; we can only conjecture what happened in the past. If we can discover the identity of our monk, if we can catch him in his robe, then we can demand an explanation; and I have no doubt that we shall learn what part he played in Gabriel’s death. “

” We must find him, Simon.”

” We must. But if you see him again, ignore him. Do not try to tackle him. Heaven knows what he might do. If there’s anything in our conjectures about Gabriel, remember we may be dealing with a murderer.

You must do as I say, Catherine. “

” I will, Simon.”

” And remember,” he added, ” you are not alone. We’re fighting this . together.”

We left the inn and he drove me back to the Revels. I was pleased because, although my visit to Worstwhisde had not given me the satisfaction for which I had hoped, I no longer felt alone, and that was a wonderful comfort.

I wrote to my father and I believed that I should have the truth from him in a few days’ time, because he would understand my need to know quickly; and when I had posted the letter I felt strengthened. Nothing unusual happened the next day, and during the following morning Dr.

Smith came to the house.

He wanted to see me alone, and Ruth left us in the winter parlour together.

He looked at me almost tenderly as he came to the chair in which I was sitting. He laid his hand on the arm of the chair and said gently: “

So you paid a visit to Worstwhistle.”

” I wanted to be sure,” I explained.

” Of course you did. And you satisfied yourself that I had been speaking the truth?”

” They would tell me nothing.”

He nodded. ” The Superintendent acted in the only way possible.

Naturally he must respect the privacy of his patients and their relations. But you did discover that there was a patient of that name in the institution. “

” Yes.”

” Catherine, believe me. I am telling you the truth when I say I know that patient to be your mother. Your father, Mervyn Corder, visits her regularly each month. No doubt he thought he was wise in keeping this from you.”

” If the patient in Worstwhistle is my mother, no doubt he did.”

” I am glad to see you calmer, Catherine. If you had asked me, I would have taken you to Worstwhistle. You would have seen then that I could have done so much more for you than Simon Redvers could possibly do.”

I was almost on the point of telling him that I had written to my father, but I did not do so. Simon had said that the two of us would solve the mystery together, and I wanted to keep this our secret matter.

Besides, there was little I hoped for from anything my father could tell me. It seemed obvious that the Catherine Corder who was in Worstwhistle must be my mother.

” Perhaps later,” the doctor was saying. ” I will take you to the place and you might see her.”

” Would that serve any useful purpose since I have never known her?”

” But you would like to see your own mother?”

” I doubt if she would know me.”

” She has her lucid moments. There are times when she thinks she is young again and you are a baby. And there are other times when she is vaguely aware of what has happened to her.”

I shivered. I was not going to tell him that I had a horror of entering that place; that I had a strange premonition that if I crossed that threshold again, I might become a prisoner there. If I told him that, he would listen with sympathy, but he would be telling himself that it was part of my overwrought condition which made me imagine that, as I imagined that I saw ” visions.”

I could not be so frank with him as I was with Simon. This was a further indication of my feelings for the latter. I told myself that I could trust no one—not even Dr. Smith—for I knew that he was ready to believe that I was in an unbalanced state. But it wasn’t true that I trusted no one. I trusted Simon.

Christmas was three days away. The servants had decorated the hall with branches of holly and there was mistletoe too. I had heard some of the female servants giggling with the men as this was fixed up in the most appropriate places. I had seen the dignified William seize Mary-Jane and give her a resounding kiss under the pearly berries.

Mary-Jane responded good-humouredly; it was all part of the fun at Christmas.

Then I received the letter. I was in the garden when I saw the postman coming towards the house. I had been looking out for him because I did not believe my father would keep me long in suspense.

And I was right. There was his handwriting on the envelope.

With wildly beating heart I hurried to my bedroom, and took the precaution of locking the doors before I opened the letter.

My dear Catherine, I read, I was startled and shocked to receive your letter. I understand your feelings and, before you read any further, I want to assure you that the Catherine Corder who is now in Worstwhistle is not your mother, although she is my wife.

I had meant, of course, to tell you the truth on your marriage, but I did not tell I could do so without consulting my brother, who is deeply concerned in this.

My wife and I were devoted to each other, and two years after our marriage we had a child a daughter named Catherine. But this was not you. My wife adored our daughter and could scarcely bear the child out of her sight. She spent the greater part of her time in the nursery supervising everything concerned with her. We had a nurse, of course.

She came to us with good recommendations, and she was affectionate, fond of children and efficient when she was not under the influence of gin.

One day when my wife and I had been visiting friends, there was mist on the moor and we lost our way. We were two hours later than we had expected to be, and when we returned the damage had been done. The nurse, taking advantage of our absence, had become intoxicated; and while she was in this state she had decided to bath the baby. She put our child into a bath of scalding water. There was only one consolation death must have been Almost instantaneous.

My dear Catherine, you who are about to become a mother will understand the grief which overtook my wife. She blamed herself for leaving the child in the nurse’s care. I shared her grief, but hers did not grow less as time passed. She continued to mourn the child and I began to be alarmed when she gave way to accusations against herself. She would pace through the house wildly sobbing, wildly laughing. I did not know then what this tragedy had done to her.

I used to tell her that we would have more children. But I could see that the need to pacify her was urgent. And then your uncle Dick had this idea.

I know how fond you are of your Uncle Dick. He has always been so good to you. That is natural, Catherine, when the relationship between you is known. He is your father. Catherine.

It is difficult to explain this to you. I wish he were here so that he could do it himself. He was not a bachelor as he was thought to be.

His wife your mother was French. He met her when he was in port for a spell at Marseilles. She came from Provence and they were married within a few weeks of their first meeting. They were ideally suited and deeply regretted your father’s long absences.

I believe he had almost decided to give up the sea when you were about to be born. Strangely enough tragedy hit us both in the same year.

Your mother died when you were born ; and that was not more than two months after we had lost our child.

Your father brought you to us because he wanted a settled home for you, and he and I believed at the time that having a child to care for would help to comfort my wife. You even had the same name. We had called our child Catherine after my wife, and your father—because you were coming to us—had decided that you should be Catherine too. I stopped for a few seconds. I was seeing it all so clearly; events were fitting together neatly to make the picture.

I was exultant because that which I had feared was not true after all.

Then, projecting myself into the past, I seemed to remember her, the wild-eyed woman who held me tightly, so tightly that I cried out in protest. I thought of the man whom I had known as my father, living through those weary years, never forgetting the happiness he had shared with the woman in Worstwhistle, dreaming that he was back in those days of anguish, calling for her to return . not as she was now, but as she had been.

I was filled with pity for him, for her; and I wished that I had been more tolerant of that gloomy house with its drawn blinds and the sunlight shut out.

I picked up the letter.

Dick thought that you would feel more secure with us than you could be with him. It was no life for a child, he said, with a father who was constantly away from home, particularly one who had no mother. He could not leave the sea now that your mother was dead; he told me that he missed her more when he. was ashore, than when he was at sea, which was natural enough. So we let you believe that you were my daughter, although I often said to him that you would have been happier to know you were his. You know how devoted to your interests he always was.

He was determined that you should receive part of your education in your mother’s country and that was why you were sent to Dijon. But we wanted everyone to think of you as my child because I was sure in the beginning that your aunt would come to think of you as her own more readily that way.

If only it had worked! For a while we thought it would. But the shock had been too much for her to bear and it was necessary to send her away. When she had left we moved to Glen House. It seemed better to cut ourselves off from old associations, and there we were not far from her place of asylum . How I wished I had known! Perhaps then I should have been able to do something to comfort him.

But the past was over and I was happy on that December morning because I was delivered of my fears.

Now I would set to work to discover who in this house was my enemy; and I would go to it with such a will that I could not fail.

My baby would be born in the early spring and I would never for a minute be parted from my child. Uncle Dick—no, my father, but I should never be able to call him that; he would always be Uncle Dick to me—Uncle Dick would come home.

I would watch over my child, and Simon would be there, and our relationship would develop as such relationships should, gradually budding, flowering, bearing fruit.

Yes, I was happy on that day.

It seemed as though the Fates had determined to be kind to me, for another incident took place on the very next day which could not fail further to raise my spirits.

During the previous day I had hugged the news to myself. I had my meals in my own room because, although I wanted to flourish the letter under the noses of Ruth, Luke, Sir Matthew and Aunt Sarah, I had decided that for a while I was going to keep this news to myself.

Nothing could have strengthened me more. My fear had gone. I was certain that if I awakened to find the monk at the foot of my bed I should be quite calm. But I was determined to discover who the monk was, and I would do this because I was no longer hampered by terrible doubts.

Caution, I said to myself. For the time being no one must know.

Simon? I asked myself. Should I tell Simon and Hagar?

The wind was bitingly cold and I decided that if it snowed I might do myself some harm, so I stayed indoors. I did think’s of sending a letter to them. But how could I be sure, absolutely sure, that it would not be intercepted?

The news could wait. In the meantime I would plan what I was going to do next.

It was after luncheon when Mary-Jane came to me in a state of excitement.

” It’s our Etty, madam,” she said. ” Her time’s come…. Two days before Christmas. We hadn’t thought it would be till the New Year.”

” You want to go and see her, don’t you, Mary Jane

” Oh well, madam…. Me Dad’s just sent word. Me Mother’s gone over there.”

” Look, Mary-Jane, you go along and see how she’s getting on. You may be able to help.”

” Thank you, madam.”

“There’s a terrible wind blowing.”

” Oh, I won’t mind that, madam.” J ” Just a moment,” I said. And I went to my wardrobe and brought out my heaviest cloak. It was the blue one which had been hung across the parapet. I put it about Mary Jane and pulled the hood right over her head. ” This will keep out the wind.” I said. ” It buttons right up, you see … and the cold can’t penetrate.”

“That’s good of you, madam.”

” I don’t want you catching cold, Mary Jane

” Oh, madam … thank you.” Her gratitude was indeed sincere. She went on rather shyly: “I’m … so pleased, madam, because you’ve seemed so much better this last day or so.”

I laughed as I finished buttoning the cloak.

” I am better. So much better,” I told her. ” Go on now … and don’t worry about getting back. Stay for the night if you want to.”

It was about dusk when she returned. She came straight up to my room and I saw at once that she was deeply disturbed.

” Etty …” I began.

She shook her head.

“The baby was born before I got there, madam. A lovely girl. Our Etty’s all right.”

” What’s wrong, then?”

” It was when I was coming home. I came round by the Abbey. And I saw it, madam. It gave me a turn. You see. it was nearly dark …”

” You saw … what?” I cried.

” n, madam. The monk. It looked at me and it beckoned.”

“Oh, Mary-Jane, how wonderful I What did you do? What did you do?”

” I stood for a second or two staring. I didn’t seem as if I could move. I was struck all of a heap. Then … I ran. It didn’t follow me.

I thought it was going to. “

I put my arms about her and hugged her. ” Oh, Mary Jane I only needed this.”

She looked at me in some astonishment, and I stood back to gaze at her.

She was about my height and the cloak was all-enveloping. She had been mistaken for me, because she was wearing my cloak, the well-known cloak which had been put over the parapet.

She was loyal; there was a bond between us; I knew that she looked upon me as the kindest mistress she had ever had. Ruth was too cold to win affection; Aunt Sarah too strange. Mary-Jane had enjoyed working for me because the relationship between us was warmer than that which usually existed between a maid and her mistress. I decided that I would take Mary-Jane into my confidence to some extent.

” Mary-Jane,” I said, ” what did you think it was? A ghost?”

” Well, madam, I don’t rightly believe in such things.”

” Nor do I. I believe that what is inside that monk’s robe is no ghost.”

” But how did it get into your bedroom, madam?”

” That’s what I’m going to find out.”

“And did it pull the curtains and take the warming-pan away?”

” I believe it did. Mary-Jane, for the time being will you please say nothing to anyone of what you have seen. Our monk thinks that it was I who was hurrying home through the Abbey ruins at dusk. He has no idea that it was you. I want to keep him in ignorance … for a while.

Will you do this? “

” I always want to do as you say, madam.”

Christmas morning dawned bright and frosty. I lay in bed happily reading my letters and greetings. There was one from the man whom I still thought of as my father. He sent me, Christmas greetings and hoped that his previous letter had not upset me. A letter from my real father had arrived on the previous day and in tfais he told me that he hoped to be home in the spring.

That longed-for spring I Then I should have my child What else? But I did not want to look beyond that. Thai was enough.

As I lay in bed my thoughts went back indeed they were never far away to the desire to discover the identity of the person who was trying to harm my child, and I went over the various monk incidents in detail, for those were the ones in which I was sure I should find the clue to the identity of my persecutor.

The monk had appeared in my room, sped along the corridor when I hurried after him, and then disappeared. The more I thought of this, the more excited I became. Was there some secret hiding-place in the gallery? The monk had been seen not only in the house but in the Abbey ruins. What if there was some connecting passage between the Abbey and the house? What if two people played the role of monk? What if Luke and Damaris had both worn the robe Damaris, on the first night I had seen it, thus enabling Luke to appear in his dressing-gown on the second floor; Luke, when I was with Damaris in the ruins?

I remembered the old plan of the Abbey which I had seen when I first came to the Revels. It was somewhere in the library. If I could find some indication on that plan where a connecting passage could possibly be, I might have begun to solve the problem. I did possess two vital clues. There was the arcade in the ruins where the monk had been seen on two occasions by Damaris and me and by Mary-Jane. I would study the plan very closely at that spot. And there was the minstrels’ gallery in the house.

I was so excited, I could scarcely wait to dress.

Why should I?

I slipped on a robe and hurried down to the library. I had little difficulty in finding the plan. It was in a leather binding with a few details about the Abbey; the parchment roll on which these were written, was yellow with age.

As I took the roll and tucked it under my arm I heard a movement behind me and, turning sharply, I saw Luke standing in the doorway.

He was looking at me with that alertness which I had noticed m people’s faces recently and which had once filled me with alarm but now had no power to hurt me. “Why, if it isn’t Catherine! Happy Christmas, Catherine . and a fruitful New Year.”

“Thank you, Luke.”

He was standing in the doorway barring my way. I felt embarrassed, not only because of what I was carrying but because I had only a robe over my nightdress.

“What’s wrong, Catherine?” he asked.

” But nothing.”

” You look as though you’re afraid I’m going to gobble you right up.”

“Then my looks are deceptive.”

” So you really feel quite benevolent towards me on this Christmas morning?”

” Shouldn’t one feel so towards the whole world on this of all mornings?”

” You’re taking the words out of old Cartwright’s mouth. We shall have to go and hear him preaching his Christmas sermon.” He yawned. ” I always feel I’d like to time him by stop-watch. I heard of someone doing that the other day. Some local bigwig. It’s a fact. He’d go to church, set his watch … ten minutes’ sermon and no more…. When the ten minutes were up he’d snap his fingers and that sermon had to stop—and it did, for the parson had his living to think of.” His eyes narrowed and he went on: ” I’m thinking of doing it myself one day, when …”

I looked at him sharply. I knew very well what he meant: when he was in command.

I felt uneasy even though the library was full of daylight.

“Well, what are you reading?” His firm fingers were on the leather case.

” Oh, it’s just something I’ve seen in the library. I wanted to have another look.”

He had taken the roll, in spite of my efforts to retain it, for I had to let it go; I could not indulge in a tug-o’-war here in the library for no apparent reason at all.

“The old Abbey again!” he murmured.

“Do you know, Catherine, you’ve got an obsession for abbeys … monks and such like.”

” Haven’t you?” I asked.

” I? Why should I? I was born here. We take all that for granted.

It’s the people who are new to the place who think it’s all so marvelous.”

He put the roll under my arm. ” Why, Catherine,” he went on, ” we’re standing under mistletoe.”

Then he put his arms round me and kissed me quickly the lips.

” Merry Christmas, Catherine, and a happy New Year!”

Then he stood aside and bowed ironically. I went past him with as much dignity as I could, and started up the stairs:;

He stood at the library door watching me. ;

I wished that he had not seen what I had been carrying. I wondered how much of my thoughts he had read. Luke bothered me. I didn’t understand him; and I had the feeling | that he was the one who resented my presence here more | than any . he and Ruth together. If it were Ruth and i Luke, I thought, it would be easier for them than anyone; | and the fact that Damaris had lied as she did could mean that ; she had done so for Luke.

When I reached my room I got into bed again and studied the plan.

It was headed Kirkland Abbey with the date 1520, and as I looked at it, it was as though the place came alive under my eyes, as though walls were built up where they had decayed, as though roofs were miraculously replaced. There it was a series of buildings which housed a community, sufficient unto itself, which had no need of outside resources, since it was completely self-supporting. It was so easy to picture it all.

I realised that I had learned the topography of the Abbey fairly well.

It was not that I had visited the place so much but my impressions had been so vivid. The central Norman tower was an excellent landmark. I traced it with my finger. The north and south transept, the sanctuary, the gallery, the chapter house, the monks’ dorter. And the arcade, with its buttresses, where I had seen the monk, was that which led to the dining hall, to the bake houses and malt-house. Then my eyes fell on the words: ” Entrance to the cellars.”

As there were cellars beneath the Abbey, there would almost certainly be tunnels connecting them with other underground chambers. Such a labyrinth was a feature of abbeys of the period. I knew this because I had read accounts of our well-known abbeys such as Fountains, Kirkstall and Rjevaulx. I noticed with rising excitement that the cellars were on that side of the Abbey which was nearest to the Revels.

I was so intent that I did not hear a knock on my door, and Ruth had come in before I realised she was there. She stood at the end of my bed in the spot where the inonis had stood.

” Merry Christmas,” she said.

” Thank you, and the same to you.”

” You seem absorbed.”

” Oh … yes.” Her eyes were on the roll and I guessed she recognised it.

” How are you feeling?”

“Much, much better.”

” That’s good news. Are you going to get up? Our guests will be arriving very soon.”

” Yes,” I said, ” I shall get up now.”

She nodded; and her eyes went once more to the plan. ( fancied she looked a little anxious.

By the time the family was ready to go to church, Simon and Hagar had still not arrived.

” They are usually here before this,” said Ruth. ” Perhaps something has happened to delay them. However, we shall go to church. We must be in our pew on Christmas morning.”

Matthew and Sarah came down to the hall dressed for church. This was indeed a rare thing and I realised that I had very seldom seen either of them dressed for going out. The carriage would take them to the church and bring them back, and it was one of those traditions that their pew should be occupied on Christmas Day.

There was something which I was longing to do, and that was go to the Abbey and look for those cellars; and I wanted to do it when no one could follow me there. If only I could make some excuse for not going to church, I could be sure that for about two hours there would be no one to surprise me.

I should have liked to go to church with them and to have taken my place in the pew, for I was beginning to feel a fondess for the old traditions and a need of the peace which the Christmas service would give me. But I had a more imperative need—the protection of my child; and I decided to practise a little deception.

When they were stepping into the carriage I stood very still for a moment, putting my hands to my body.

Ruth said sharply: “What’s wrong?”

” It’s nothing, but I really don’t think I shall go with you. The doctor said I should be very careful indeed not to overtax myself.”

“‘I'll stay behind with you.” Ruth told me. ” You she go to bed at once.”

” No,” I insisted. ” Mary-Jane will help me. She is we good and understands perfectly.”

” But I feel I should stay behind,” said Ruth.

” Then if you feel that, I must come with you, for I an certainly not going to allow you to miss the Christmas service. ” H She hesitated.

Then she said: ” Well, if you insist… What are you going to do?”

” Go to my room…. I do want to feel well for the rest i the day.”

She nodded. Then she said to the groom: ” Go and bring! Mary-Jane to me … and quickly, or we shall be late forj church.” J Mary-Jane came hurrying out. j ” Mrs. Rockwell doesn’t feel well enough to accompany us | to church,” she said. ” Take her to her room and look after i| her.”

” Yes, madam,” said Mary Jane

Ruth, satisfied, got into the carriage and in a few seconds they were driving away, while Mary-Jane and I went up to my room.

When we were there I said: “We are going out, Mary Jane

” But, madam …”

I knew I had to take Mary-Jane into my confidence to a greater extent.

When the monk had appeared before her he had brought her into this mystery, and the fact that she had come straight to me and told me what she had seen, and had kept her promise to tell no one else, proved her to be an ally.

” I feel quite well,” I said. ” I should have liked to join the church party, but there is something else I have to do. We are going to the Abbey.”

I made her wrap herself ia the blue cloak, and I myself wore another of dark brown.

Then we set out for the Abbey.

I was anxious that we should lose no time, for I did not know how long our explorations would last and it was necessary that we should be back in the house before the church party returned.

” I have been looking at a plan of the Abbey,” I told Mary Jane ” I have it with me here. When we have seen the monk in the ruins he has been near one spot and that is close by the entrance to the cellars. Let us go there immediately. ” "

"if we see the monk, what shall we do?” she asked.

” I don’t think we shall this morning.”

” I’d like to give him a piece of my mind. Gave me a turn. tie did, even though I’m not expecting.”

” I should hope not,” I said; and we laughed together, rather nervously, I thought, because Mary-Jane realised as well as I did that we were not concerned with a mere practical joker and that there was a sinister implication behind all that had happened. ” What we have to do,” I told her, ” is find out if there is some means of getting from the Abbey ruins into the house. We must remember that a long time ago certain valuables remained hidden for some years and prob ably members of the family too. You see, Mary-Jane, every thing points to the fact that there is a secret entrance.”

Mary-Jane nodded. ” It wouldn’t surprise me, madam. Why, this house is full of old nooks and crannies. Happen it’s there somewhere if we could find it.”

When we reached the ruins I felt slightly breathless with excitement and exertion and Mary-Jane slowed us down a little. ” You’ve got to remember how it is with you, madam.”

I did remember. I was determined to take the utmost care of myself. I thought then: there was never a child in need of as much care as this one; the danger which threatens it makes it so.

We went along the arcade from buttress to buttress as I had seen the monk do; and we came to what I knew to be the bake house and malt-house. Now we had reached the remains of a spiral staircase which I was sure must lead to the cellars. Having studied my plan so well, I knew that we had been working back towards the house, and this was a part of the ruins which was very likely the nearest to the Revels.

Warily I descended the stairs ahead of Mary-Jane, and at the bottom of them we came to two passages, both leading in the direction of the house. These had evidently been tunnels, and I felt disappointed that I saw them because they, like the nave and transepts, had only the sky for their roofs.

However, we each walked along one of these, that half- wall dividing us, and when we had gone about fifty yards they merged into one and we were in what could easily have been a dwelling-place. There were several large chambers, the remains of brick walls showing us where they had been divided. I suspected that this was the place where the valuables had been hidden at the time of the Civil War. In that case there must be some connecting link with the house. w< had to find it.

We crossed these chambers and that seemed like the end of the ruins.

I could see the Revels now, very close, and ‘si knew that the part of it which contained the minstrels’ gallery was immediately opposite us.

I was excited, yet exasperated,: for it appeared that we could go no farther. ;

Mary-Jane looked at me helplessly as though to ask what next. But I glanced at my watch and saw that if we did not return to the house we should not be back by the time the church party returned.

” We’ll have to go,” I said, ” but we’ll come again.”

Mary-Jane in her disappointment kicked at several large stones which were propped against a crumbling wall. There was a hollow sound; but the significance of this did not occur to me until later, because my mind was on the conjectures which might arise if it were discovered that I had feigned indisposition in order to visit the ruins.

” Another time,” I went on. ” Perhaps to-morrow. But we must go now.”

It was fortunate that we returned to the house when we did, for I had been in my room no more than a few minutes when Mary-Jane came to tell me that Dr. Smith was below and asking for me.

I went down at once.

” Catherine,” he said, taking my hand in his and looking searchingly into my face, ” how are you?”

” I am well, thank you,” I answered.

” I was disturbed when I saw you were not at church with the others.”

” Oh, I thought it would do me more good not to go today.”

” I see. You merely felt you needed a rest. I was there with my daughter—and took the first opportunity of slipping out.”

” But you would have known if I had been taken ill. Someone would have come for you.”

” It’s true I thought it must mean only some slight indisposition.

Nevertheless I wanted to see you for myself. “

“How attentive you are!” ” But of course I am.”

” Yet I am not really your patient, you know. Jessie Dankwait is coming to the Revels in due course.”

” I shall insist on being at hand.”

” Come into the winter parlour,” I said. ” There is a good fire there.”

We went into the parlour which looked charming, for holly decorated the walls, and the scarlet berries were particularly big and plentiful that year.

” Wasn’t that your maid I saw when I arrived?” asked the doctor as we seated ourselves by the fire. ” I believe she has a sister who has just had a baby.”

” That is so. Mary-Jane was very excited on the day the child was born. She went to see her, and whom else do you think she saw?”

He was smiling as though he were very pleased to see me in such good spirits.

” You’ll be surprised,” I went on, ” when I tell you that Mary-Jane saw the monk.”

” She saw … the monk!”

” Yes. I had made her wear one of my cloaks, and she came home by way of the ruins. The monk was there and went through the same performance, beckoning her.”

I heard his deep intake of breath.

“Indeed!”

” I have told no one, but you must know, of course, because you suspected that I might be losing my mind, and I do want you to know that I am as balanced as I ever was. And there is something even more wonderful.”

” I am eager to hear it.”

“I have heard from my old home.” I told him what my father had told me. He relaxed visibly. Then he leaned for ward and grasped my hand warmly in his.

” Oh, Catherine,” he said fervently, ” this is indeed wonderful news.

Nothing could have pleased me better. “

” You can imagine how I feel.”

” I certainly can.”

” And now that Mary-Jane has seen the monk … well, everything is changed since that dreadful day when you told me …”

” I have been so anxious ever since. I could not make up my mind whether I had been right to tell you or whether I should have held my peace.”

” I think you were right to tell me. It is better to have these matters brought into the open. You see, I have now been able to clear up all doubts.”

He was suddenly very grave. ” But, Catherine, you were saying that Mary-Jane saw the apparition. What does this mean?”

” That someone is threatening the hie of my child. I must I discover the identity of that person. At least I know of one | who is involved.” j I stopped and he said quickly: “You know of one who is involved?”

Still I hesitated for it was not easy to tell him that I suspected his daughter.

But he was insistent and I blurted out: “I’m. sorry, but I have to tell you that Damaris is involved in this.”

He stared at me in horror.

” She was with me when we returned to the house,” I went on. ” You will remember that you insisted she should accompany me. We saw the monk and she pretended not to see him.”

” Damaris!” he whispered, as though to himself.

“There was no doubt that she saw, yet she denied doing so. She must know who this person is who is trying to unnerve me. When she denied that she saw him, I knew at once that she was an accomplice.”

” It can’t be true! Why … why?”

” I wish I knew. But at least I have made some discoveries in the last few days. The trouble is that it is so difficult to trust anyone.”

” That is a reproach and I believe I deserve it. You must believe me, Catherine, when I tell you that I suffered torment when I discovered there was a Catherine Corder in Worst- whistle, and her connection with you. I told the Rockwells Sir Matthew and Ruth because I considered it my duty to do so. I only wanted you to go there for a few days for observation. I had made no suggestion that you should go in the ordinary way. I was thinking of what was best for you.”

” It was such a blow when I heard my name mentioned in connection with the place.”

” I know. But … this is becoming a nightmare. Damaris … my own daughter … to have played a part in it. There must be some mistake.

Have you told anyone of this? “

” No, not yet.”

” I think I understand your reasoning. The less you say of these matters the easier it will be to catch your enemy. But I am glad you have told me.”

There was a knock on the door and William entered.

“Mrs. Rockwell-Redvers and Mr. Redvers have arrived. madam.”

So the doctor and I went downstairs together to welcome Hagar and Simon to the Revels.

That afternoon Simon and I had an opportunity to talk together. The wind was still blowing from the north but the snow had held off.

The older members of the family were in their rooms resting. I did not know where Ruth and Luke were. Ruth had said that as I felt too unwell for church that morning I ought to rest before tea. I said I would do this, but I was restless in my room and I came out after ten minutes and went along to the winter parlour, where Simon was sitting thoughtfully by the fire.

He rose delightedly when I entered the room.

“You’ve been looking radiant since we arrived,” he told me. ” The change is remarkable. I’m sure something good has happened. You’ve discovered something?”

I felt myself flush with pleasure. Simon’s compliments would always be genuine. That was his way—So I knew that I did look radiant.

I told him about the letter and Mary-Jane’s adventure; and how we had gone on a tour of exploration that morning.

I was thrilled to see the way he received the news of my parentage.

His face creased into a smile and then he began to laugh.

” There couldn’t be better news for you, could there, Catherine,” he said. ” As for me …” He leaned towards me and looked into my face.

” If you came from a line of raving lunatics I should still say you are the sanest woman I’ve ever met.”

I laughed with him. I was very happy there in the winter parlour . the two of us sitting by the fire; and I thought:

If I were not a widow, this might be considered a little improper.

” You told the doctor?” he said. ” You were with him when we arrived.”

‘ ” Yes, I told him. Like you, he was delighted.”

Simon nodded.

” And about Mary Jane

“Yes, I told him that too. But, Simon, I have decided not to tell anyone else … except your grandmother, of course. I want no one else to know just yet.”

” That’s wise,” he said. ” We don’t want to put our monk on his guard, do we? How I wish he would appear at this moment; I should like to come face to face with him. I wonder if there’s a chance of his putting in an appearance tonight.”

” Perhaps there are too many people in the house. However, let us hope he does.”

” I’d catch him, I’ll guarantee.”

” I believe you would.”

Simon looked down at his hands and I noticed afresh how strong they were. I guessed he was thinking of what he would do to the monk if he caught him.

” I have a map of the Abbey,” I said. ” I’ve been trying to find another way into the house.”

“Any luck?”

” None at all. I took Mary-Jane down to the ruins while the others were at church this morning.”

” I thought you were supposed to be resting.”

” I didn’t say so. I merely said I wished to stay at home. The rest was presumed.”

” The deceit of a woman!” he mocked me; and I was so happy in this friendship between us. ” Now tell me,” he went on, ” what have you discovered?”

” Nothing for certain, but I believe it possible that some connecting passage exists.”

” Why are you so sure?”

” Because of the way in which the monk appeared both in the house and in the Abbey ruins. He would have to keep his costume somewhere. Then he disappeared so neatly on the first night I saw him. I believe he has an accomplice.”

” Damaris,” he said.

I nodded.

“Who might play the monk on certain occasions.”

” It’s possible.”

” I have a suspicion that the way into this hiding-place is in the minstrels’ gallery.”

” Why?”

” Because that’s the only place into which he could have disappeared on that first night.”

“Good God!” he cried.

“That’s true.”

” I feel certain that there is some way out of the house in the gallery there.”

” Could there be … and the household know nothing about it?”

” Why not? The Roundheads lived here for some years and they didn’t find it.”

What are we waiting for? ” asked Simon.

He rose and together we made our way to the minstrels’ gallery.

The gallery had always seemed an uncanny place because it was so dark.

There were no windows up there, and the only light came from the hall.

Heavy curtains hung on either side of the balcony. In the past the idea must have been for the musicians who played there to be heard and sometimes not seen.

On this afternoon it was dismal and eerie.

It was not large. It would hold an orchestra of ten men perhaps, but they would have been somewhat cramped. The back wall was hung with tapestry which had clearly not been moved for years. Simon went round tapping the walls, but he could only do so through the tapestry, which was not very helpful.

At one spot he found that the tapestry could be pulled aside, and my excitement was great when behind this we discovered a door. I held the tapestry back while he opened it, but it was only an empty cupboard which smelt damp and musty.

” He could have hidden in this cupboard until th^ hue and cry was over,” said Simon, closing the door.

” But he came from the second floor.”

“You mean Luke?”

” Well … I was thinking of Luke,” I answered, letting the tapestry fall into place.

” H’m ” murmured Simon. ^ There was a sudden movement behind us; we had had our backs to the door which led into the gallery, and we turned like two guilty people.

” Hallo,” said Luke. ” I thought the ghosts of the minstrels had returned to haunt us when I heard voices in here.”

I fervently wished then that I could have Seen his face.

” This gallery’s not used enough,” said Simon. ” It reeks of age.”

” It could scarcely accommodate a modem orchestra. At the last ball we gave we had the players on the dais in the hall.”

” So much more effective to have them in the gallery,” I heard myself say.

” Yes, playing the harpsichord or the sackbut or psaltery … or whatever they did play in the dim and distant past.” Luke’s voice sounded mocking. I thought: This morning he found me in the library. This afternoon it is the minstrels‘ gallery. | We all came out on to the stairs and Luke returned with | us to the winter parlour. l There we sat by the fire idly talking together, but I felt ; that there was a wariness among us of which each of us was conscious.

Dinner that evening was to be served in the hall, for even though we were still in mourning Christmas was Christmas. and for centuries Christmas dinner had been eaten there.

The long refectory table had been dressed with taste. At intervals candles burned in candlesticks of pewter, shining a light on the gleaming cutlery and glass on the table, and sprigs of holly were strewn on the huge lace tablecloth. It would have seemed impossible not to be festive at such a table. Candles burned in their sconces on the walls and I had never seen the hall so brightly lighted. As I came down the stairs I thought: This is how it must have looked a hundred years ago.

I was wearing a loose tea gown of mole-coloured velvet with wide hanging sleeves which fell back from the elbows, and ruffles of lime-green lace at the neck. I had sent to Harrogate for it, and I felt I could not have had anything more suitable for my condition and this occasion.

It was the custom, Ruth had told me, to exchange gifts at the dinner table and I saw that brightly coloured packages were piled up at various places on the table. I saw that our names had been written on pieces of parchment and set in the places we were to take. We were fairly widely spaced at such a large table for there were only seven of us to dine, although after dinner several people would call on us, as Sir Matthew had said, to take wine. I knew that among these people would be Dr. Smith and Damaris, and Mr. and Mrs. Cart- wright and some members of their family.

Ruth was already there talking to William who was busy at the wagon with two of the maids.

” Ah,” she said as I came down, ” are you feeling better?”

” I am feeling very well, thank you.”

” I’m so glad. It would have been unfortunate if you had not felt well to-night. But if you should feel tired before everyone leaves, you must slip away. I’ll make your excuses for you.”

“Thanks, Ruth.”

She pressed my hand; it was the first time I had felt any warmth from her. The Christmas feeling, I told myself.

Hagar was the next to arrive. I watched her sweep down the staircase, and although she had to walk with the aid of a stick she made a magnificent entrance. She was dressed in a velvet gown of heliotrope, a shade which was becoming to her white hair, and a style that had been fashionable twenty years before. I had never seen anyone with as much dignity as Hagar; I felt that everyone must be a little in awe of her, and I was glad that she and I had become such friends.

She was wearing an emerald necklace, ear-rings and a ring in which was a huge square-cut stone.

She put her cool cheek against mine and said: “Well, Catherine, it is pleasant to have you here with us. Is Simon down yet?” She shook her head in affectionate exasperation. ” I am sure he is dressing under protest.”

” Simon never did like what he calls dressing up for an occasion,” said Ruth. ” I remember he once said that no occasion was worth all the trouble.”

” He has his opinions about such matters,” agreed Hagar. ” And here’s Matthew. Matthew, how are you?”

Sir Matthew was coming down the stairs and I saw Aunt Sarah behind him.

Sarah was looking excited; she had put on a gown with rather extreme decolletage. It was of blue satin decorated with ribbons and lace and it had the effect of making- her appear very young but perhaps that was the excitement one sensed in her.

Her eyes went to the table. ” Oh, the presents!” she cried. ” Always the most fascinating part, don’t you think, Hagar?”

” You will never grow up, Sarah,” said Hagar.

But Sarah had turned to me: ” You like the presents, don’t you, Catherine. You and I have a lot in common, haven’t we?” She turned to Hagar. ” We decided that we had when … when …”

Simon came down the stairs then. It was the first time I had seen him dressed for the evening, and I thought that if he was not handsome he looked very distinguished.

” Ha!” cried Hagar. ” So you have succumbed to custom then, grandson.”

He took her hand and kissed it, and I, watched the con tented smile on her lips.

” There are times,” he said, ” when there is no alternative but to succumb.”

We were standing together in that candlelit hall when suddenly we heard the sounds of a violin coming from the minstrels’ gallery.

There was immediate silence and everyone was looking up. The gallery was in darkness but the violin went on playing, and the tune it played was one I knew well as ” The Light of Other Days.”

Hagar was the first to speak. ” Who is it?” she demanded. No one answered and the wail of the violin filled the hall. Then Simon said:

” I’ll investigate.” But as he moved towards the staircase a figure appeared at the balcony. It was Luke, his long fair hair falling about his pale face.

” I thought it was appropriate to serenade you all on such an occasion,” he called.

He began to sing in a very pleasant tenor voice and to accompany himself with the violin. ” When I remember all The friends, so linked together, I’ve seen around me fall Like leaves in wintry weather;

I feel like one, Who treads alone Some banquet hall deserted, Whose lights are fled Whose garlands dead, And all but he departed. “” When he had finished, he bowed, laid down his violin and shortly afterwards was running down the stairs to join us.

“Very effective!” murmured Simon dryly. ” You’re like your grandfather,” put in Hagar.

” Fond of admiration.”

” Now, Hagar,” protested Sir Matthew with a laugh, ” you were always hard on me.”

” I have often said,” Ruth put in affectionately, ” that Luke should sing more and practise more with the violin.”

We sat down at the table and, while William and the maids began to serve us, we looked at our presents. Sarah squealed with delight as a child might have done ; the rest of us opened our gifts decorously and murmured conventional thanks to each other.

There was one present beside my place which held a certain significance. This bore the inscription, ” A Happy Christmas from Hagar and Simon Rockwell-Redvers,” in Hagar’s bold handwriting. I wondered why they had given me a -joini present and my heart sank a little because I imagined that Simon had had nothing for me and that Hagar had probably added his name to hers to hide this fact. But when I opened the box I stared in amazement, for it contained a ring. I knew that it was a valuable one and that it was not new. It was some family heirloom, I guessed a ruby set in a circle of diamonds. I lifted it out of the case and looked from Simon to Hagar. Simon was watching me intently; Hagar was giving me the special smile which usually she reserved for Simon only.

” But this is too … too …” I stammered.

I was aware that the attention of all at the table was on me and the ring.

“It has been in the family for generations,” said Simon. ” The Redvers family, that is.”

” But it’s so beautiful.”

” Oh, we did have some possessions, you know,” said Simon. ” The Rockwells didn’t have everything.”

” I didn’t mean …”

” We know what you mean, my dear,” said Hagar. ” Simon is teasing.

Slip it on your finger. I want to see if it fits. “

It was too small for the middle finger on my right hand, on which I tried it first, but it fitted perfectly on the third finger.

“It looks becoming, does it not?” Hagar asked, glaring round at the rest of the company as though daring them to contradict her.

” It is such a beautiful ring,” Ruth murmured.

” The Redvers seal of approbation, Catherine,” murmured Luke.

“How can I thank you?” I said, looking at Hagar, for I could not look at Simon then. I knew that there was a significance about this and that everyone at the table was aware of it, although I was not . entirely. But I did know it was a very valuable present and that in giving it to me Simon and Hagar were proclaiming their affection for me; perhaps they meant to tell the person who was persecuting me that he had not only to deal with me but them also.

” By wearing it,” Simon answered.

” It’s a talisman,” cried Luke.

“Do you know, Catherine, while you wear that ring nothing can harm you.

It’s the old family tradition.

There’s a curse on it. no, sorry, a blessing, The genie of the ring will protect you from the powers of evil. “

” Then it’s doubly precious,” I said lightly. ” Since it not only preserves me from evil but is so decorative. I am so grateful to you for giving me such a lovely present.”

” Puts the rest of our little gifts to shame, doesn’t it,” sighed Luke.

“But always remember, Catherine, it is the spirit of the gift that counts.”

” It is a good thing to remember,” Hagar’s voice boomed authoritatively.

Because I was afraid that I might betray the emotion this gift aroused in me, I decided to say no more before the others but to thank both Hagar and Simon privately; so I hastily turned to my soup which William had served, and by the time the turkey, with its chestnut stuffing, was being eaten I was conscious of a quiet peaceful pleasure.

The Christmas pudding was brought in magnificent with it’s wreath of holly round the base and the sprig stuck jauntily into the top.

William poured the brandy over it and Sir Matthew at the head of the table set it alight.

” Last Christmas,” said Sarah, ” it was very different. The house was full of guests. Gabriel was sitting where you are sitting now, Catherine.

” Don’t let’s talk of sad things,” said Matthew. ” Remember this is the first day of Christmas.”

” Christmas is a time for remembering,” protested Sarah. ” It’s the time when you recall the departed.”

“Is it?” said Ruth.

” Of course it is,” cried Sarah. ” Do you remember, Hagar, that Christmas when we joined the party for the first time?”

” I remember,” said Hagar.

Sarah had leaned her elbows on the table; she was staring at the flaming pudding.

” Last night,” she said, in a hollow voice, ” I lay in bed thinking of all the Christmases of my life. The first one I remembered was when I was three. I woke up in the night and heard the music and I was frightened. I cried, and Hagar scolded me.”

“The first of many a scolding from Aunt Hagar, I’m certain,” said Luke.

“Someone had to take charge of the family,” Hagar answered serenely. ” It might not have done you much harm. Luke, to have encountered a little more discipline.”

Sarah was going on dreamily: “Right through them all I went until I reached last Christmas. Do you remember how we drank the toasts afterwards? There was a special one to Gabriel after his escape.”

There was a silence of some seconds which I broke by asking: “What escape was that?”

” Gabriel’s,” said Sarah. ” He might have been killed.” She put her hand to her lips. ” Just think if he had … he would never have met Catherine. You wouldn’t be here with us to-day, Catherine, if he had died. You wouldn’t be going to …”

” Gabriel never told me about this accident,” I said.

” It was hardly worth mentioning,” said Ruth sharply. One of the walls in the ruins collapsed; he was close by and there was a slight injury to his foot. It was nothing much . a matter of bruises. “

” But,” cried Sarah, her blue eyes flashing almost angrily, I thought, because Ruth was trying to make light of some thing which she thought important, ” just by chance he saw what was about to happen. He was able to escape in time. If he hadn’t seen it…. he would have been killed.”

” Let’s talk of something cheerful,” said Luke. ” It didn’t happen.

So that’s that.”

” If it had,” murmured Sarah, there wouldn’t have been any need to”

” William,” said Ruth, ” Mrs. Redvers’s glass is empty.”

I was thinking of Gabriel, of the fear he had seemed to have of his home; I remembered the cloud which had appeared during our honeymoon when he had discovered the coastal ruins which must have reminded him of Kirkland Abbey. Was the falling of the wall really an accident?

Did Gabriel know that someone in the Revels was trying to kill him?

Was that the explanation of his fear? Was that why he had married me so that there would be two of us to fight against the evil which threatened? Had that evil caught up with Gabriel? If so, it meant that someone wanted his inheritance. That person must have been horrified when, after murdering Gabriel and I had come to the conclusion now that Gabriel had been murdered he found that there was another who might step into Gabriel’s shoes: my child.

It was all so clear; and there in the candlelit hall, while we were formally served with Christmas pudding, I realised as I never had before the certainty that the person who had murdered Gabriel was now determined that my child should never be born, in case it should be a boy.

There was one way of making absolutely sure that I did not produce a son—and that was by killing me.

There had been no attempt on my life. No, as Simon had said, that would have been too suspicious in view of Gabriel’s sudden and violent death. I began to see a pattern forming I was in danger—acute danger—but I was no longer terrified as I had been. It was not danger which could frighten me so much as the fear that my mind was tainted and that I was imagining all the uncanny occurrences. How strange it was that this actual danger was far more tolerable than something which I might have conjured up in a distorted imagination.

I found myself looking at Luke. With his long fair hair falling about his pale face I thought he looked like a cross between an angel and a satyr. He reminded me of the figures which were carved on the stonework. There was a satanic gleam in his eyes as they met mine. It was almost as though he read my thoughts and was amused by them.

We drank toasts in champagne. My turn came and they all stood, their glasses lifted. I believed that one of those people who were drinking my health might at that very moment be planning to kill me, but it must not be a violent death—it would have to appear a natural one.

The meal over, the table was quickly cleared by the servants, and we were ready to receive our guests. There were more people than I had expected. Dr. Smith and Damaris were the first arrivals and I wondered what was happening to the doctor’s wife and what she thought of being left alone on Christmas Day.

I asked Damaris and she said that her mother was resting. It was long past her time for retiring to bed and the doctor would not allow Christmas or anything else to interfere with her routine.

The Cartwrights came with several members of their family, including married sons and daughters and their families. That was the extent of the guests, and, like Sarah, I began to wonder about other Christmases—only I thought of Christmases in the future, not the past.

There was no dancing and the guests were conducted to a drawing-room on the first-floor; even the conversation was quiet. Everyone was remembering Gabriel on that day, because it was due to his death that the traditional entertaining had not taken place.

I found an opportunity of thanking Hagar for the ring. She smiled and said: “We wanted you to have it … both of us.”

” It is very valuable. I must also thank Simon for it.”

” Here he is.” , Simon was standing beside us, and I turned to him. “

I was thanking your grandmother for this magnificent ring.”

He took my hand and studied the ring. ” It looks better on her hand than it did in its case,” he remarked to his grandmother.

She nodded and he continued to hold my hand for a few seconds, his head on one side, regarding the ring with a smile of satisfaction about his lips.

Ruth joined us.

” Catherine,” she said, ” if you want to slip away to your room I should do so. You mustn’t tire yourself. That’s the very thing we wish to avoid.”

I did feel then so moved by new emotions that I wanted to go to my room, for there was a great deal I had to think about. Moreover, I knew that I should be resting.

” We shall be here to-morrow,” Hagar reminded me. ” We might go for a drive to-morrow morning the three of us unless you would like to come, Ruth?”

” I dare say people will be calling all the morning,” said Ruth. ” You know how it is on Boxing Day.”

” Well, we shall see,” said Hagar. ” Good night, my dear. I am sure you are wise to retire. It must have been a long day for you.”

I kissed her hand, and she drew me to her and kissed my cheek. Then I gave my hand to Simon. To my astonishment he bent down swiftly and kissed it. I could feel his kiss, hard and warm on my skin. I flushed faintly and hoped Ruth did not notice this.

“Slip away, Catherine,” said Ruth.

“I’ll make your excuses to everybody. They’ll understand.”

So I slipped away, but when I was in my room I knew I could not sleep.

I was too excited.

I lighted the candles and lay down on my bed. I turned the ring round and round on my finger. I believed that it was a ring which the Redvers family treasured and that it had been given to me because they wished to imply that they wanted me to be one of them. I had been lying thus when the monk had come to my room and the strangeness had begun. I kept going over everything that had happened, right from the first, and I was conscious of an urgency.

Time was short. Already I was easily tired and forced to leave the party before it was over. This mystery should be solved . and quickly solved.

If I could find that way into the house . if I could find the monk’s robe. We had not really examined the minstrels’ gallery thoroughly.

We had found the cupboard, but we had not looked behind the tapestries on the walls. How long, I wondered, was it since that tapestry had been taken down?

I rose from my bed I had not undressed for I was filled with a great desire to have another look at the gallery.

I went along the corridor. I could hear the sound of voices and they were coming from the drawing-room on this floor; quietly I descended the first flight of stairs to the minstrel’s gallery. I opened the door and went in.

The only light came from the numerous wall candles in the hall. So it was dark and gloomy in the gallery and I told myself that I had been foolish to hope to discover anything in this poor light.

I leaned over the balcony looking down on the hall, of which I had a good view apart from that section immediately below.

And as I stood there the door opened and a shape loomed on the threshold. For a moment I thought it was the monk and, in spite of my belief that I wanted to see him, a shudder of fear ran through me.

But this was no monk. It was a man in ordinary evening dress and when he whispered: “Why … Catherine!” I recognised the voice of Dr.

Smith.

He went on speaking very quietly. ” What are you doing here?”

“I couldn’t sleep.”

He came into the gallery and we stood side by side near the balcony.

He put his fingers to Us lips. ” There is someone down there,” he whispered.

I was surprised that he should consider that a matter for secrecy as there were so many guests in the house, and was about to say so, when be seized my arm and drew me closer to the balcony.

Then I heard voices.

” Damaris! We’re alone at last.” The sound of that voice gave me a pain which was almost physical. It was not only the words but the tone in which they were spoken which was so significant. For it was both tender and passionate, and only rarely had I heard that timbre in the voice. It was Simon who was speaking.

Then Damaris: ” I am afraid. My father would not be pleased.”

In these matters, Damaris, we do not please our fathers, but ourselves. ”

” But to-night he is here. Perhaps he is watching us now.”

Simon laughed and at that moment they moved towards the centre of the hall. He had his arm about her.

I turned away, not wanting to look. I was afraid they might be aware of us. My humiliation would have been complete if Simon knew that I had looked on at his flirtation with Damaris.

As I walked towards the door of the gallery, the doctor was still beside me; and together we went up the stairs to the first floor. He seemed preoccupied, scarcely aware of me, and I had no doubt that he was very worried about his daughter.

“I shall forbid her to see that … philanderer!” he said.

I did not answer; I had clasped my hands together and touched the ring which but a short time ago had seemed to have such a significance.

” Perhaps it would be useless to forbid her,” I suggested.

” She would have to obey me,” he retorted; and I saw the veins, prominent at his. temples. I had never known him so agitated before and that seemed to mark the depth of his affection for her. I warmed to him because such parental concern was exactly what I had so sadly missed during the absences of my real father.

“He is overbearing,” I said, and my own voice was very angry. ” I believe he would always find a way of getting what he wanted.”

” I am sorry,” said the doctor. ” I am forgetting you. You should be resting, I thought you had retired to do that. What made you come to the gallery?”

” I couldn’t sleep. ! was too excited, I suppose.”

” At least,” he said, ” this is a warning to us both.”

“What made you come to the gallery?” I asked-suddenly.

” I knew they were down there together.”

” I see. And you would frown on a match between them?”

“A match I He would not offer her marriage. The old lady has other plans for him. He’ll marry her choice and it won’t be my daughter. Besides … she is for Luke.”

” Is she? She did not seem to think so tonight.”

” Luke is devoted to her. If only they were older they would be married by now. It would be a tragedy if she were ruined by this…”

” You do not think very highly of his honour.”

“His honour! You have not been here long enough to know his reputation in the neighbourhood. But I am keeping you and it grows late. I shall be taking Damaris home immediately. Good night, Catherine.”

He took my hand. It was the one on which was the Redvers ring.

I went to my room. I was so upset that I forgot to lock my doors that night. But there were no midnight visitors, and I was alone with my emotions.

That night I learned the true nature of these emotions, and I blamed myself for allowing them to become so strong, disguised as they were by the semblance of dislike. I had been angry with him because I thought he did not esteem me enough. I had been hurt because I wanted that esteem.

That night I learned that hatred grows out of the strength of one’s own emotions; and that when a woman comes close to hating a man she should be watchful, for it means that her feelings are deeply engaged.

He is a cheat, I told myself, as I tried to shut out the echo of his voice talking to Damaris. He is a philanderer who amuses himself with any female who is handy. I happened to be at hand. What a fool I am.

And how we hate those who make us aware of our own folly. Hate and love. There are times when the two can run side by side.