Tangle of Need

Chapter 22

HAVING HAD A message that the senior lieutenant wanted to see her, Adria knocked on the door to Riley’s office three days after the mating ceremony, found herself being waved in though he held a phone to his ear. “Grab a seat,” he said. “This’ll only take a sec.”

As she waited, she took in his office. It was—and wasn’t—what she would’ve expected. Ordered and clean, it was free of clutter. That fit the lieutenant’s rock-solid, calm nature. What didn’t fit was the framed poster behind his desk—of the kaleidoscope of color, flesh, feathers, sequins, and more that was Rio de Janeiro’s Carnaval.

Or perhaps it did fit, she thought with an inward smile. After all, pragmatic, sensible Riley had crossed dangerous pack lines to claim a leopard sentinel as his mate. No one, she reminded herself, was one-dimensional … not even the angry man who’d had his hands so hot and rough on her skin. “Have you been?” she asked Riley when he hung up the phone, shoving the raw memories away before they could derail her all over again.

Following her gaze to the poster, he nodded. “Survived it, too.” A smile that had a story behind it. “How was the outer-perimeter shift? You got back this morning?”

“Yes, it was good. Peaceful.” She’d left the afternoon after the mating ceremony, taking over from one of the leopards. “I’m happy to do extra shifts up there.”

Instead of accepting the offer, Riley leaned back in his chair, dark eyes intent. “You’re a highly experienced senior soldier, Adria—running patrol will frustrate you if you don’t have other outlets for your skill. Matthias tells me you were in charge of training the novices in his region.”

It had been incredibly hard to walk away from “her” kids, but she’d been worried her emotional troubles would spill over into her teaching. So she’d trained up a replacement and made sure her novices were comfortable with the other soldier before she left. Things had changed in the interim, and she missed working with their young, but would not do so at the expense of another packmate, especially one she loved.

“Indigo’s brilliant at what she does.” Though she tried to keep her tone even, her wolf bristled.

“No argument,” Riley said at once. “I have something else in mind for you.” He waited, as if giving her the opportunity to interrupt. When she didn’t, he continued. “According to Matthias, you’re very good with the submissives. Which doesn’t surprise me, given the true status of your rank.”

Of course Riley would know. “A trainer working with submissives,” she said with a smile, “has to realize that while they’re never going to be soldiers, they have unique strengths of their own.” The most vulnerable in the hierarchy didn’t respond well to the necessarily ruthless teaching style utilized to train the dominants.

Riley gave a small nod. “I’d like you to take over the self-defense training of twenty-five submissive kids, ages fourteen to eighteen. They’ve had the normal course, but Hawke wants them to get as much advanced training as they’re able to handle.”

“The continuing hostilities,” Adria said, knowing the alpha had to be thinking about a situation where the dominants were killed in large numbers. A hard thing to contemplate, but it had to be done.

“You should talk to Walker.” Riley passed across a datapad loaded with a list of names and photos. “Your group’s skewed toward the younger age group. He gave most of those kids their basic training. The older ones, Eli handled.”

“I’ll touch base with them both.” Adria knew how important it was that the three of them work as a unit. “Who’s training the maternal kids?” A second later, she clicked her fingers, her wolf nudging at her. “I bet you it’s Drew.”

Riley laughed. “My brother knows how to walk that fine line between making sure they never forget he’s more dominant, and not pissing them off. He’s got forty in his group, been working with them for months.”

Adria whistled. “Those are big numbers.”

“Turns out we had more than the usual number of births fourteen to eighteen years ago. A statistically significant percentage of those pups are turning out to be dominants—soldier and maternal, but it’s affected every level of the hierarchy.”

Adria’s wolf lifted its muzzle in a silent, mournful howl as understanding whispered through her veins. Changelings were the least fertile of the three races, but it had been observed over and over that when a pack lost a brutal number of its own within a short time frame, birth rates spiked in the years following. And SnowDancer had suffered heartbreaking losses two decades ago.

Riley had the same solemn knowledge in his eyes when he said, “Questions?”

“Anything I need to know about the kids that might not be immediately apparent?”

“Walker’s probably the best person to answer that,” Riley said, picking up his phone. “I’ll see if he’s available.”

Walker wasn’t in the den, but they were able to catch him on his cell. “Call me at any stage,” he said after they’d finished going through the list, his insight into the pups she’d be taking on displaying a sensitivity to the needs of the young that resonated deeply with her. “They know they can come to me no matter what, and might do so until they begin to trust you—I’ll let you know if any issues crop up.”

“Thanks.”

Ending the call soon afterward, Riley said, “Half your group’s on a field trip, but they’ll be back by seven. Unless you have another commitment, we’ll meet at eight.”

“Eight works. See you then.” She headed out of the office, deciding to use her free time to further explore the territory as Hawke had requested.

She’d only been walking for a minute when she saw the most amazing sight.

Two small leopard cubs scrabbled around the corner, obviously racing each other … to come to a dead stop, claws scraping on stone, when they saw her. Two heads lifted. Two pairs of beautiful green-gold eyes held her own.

Glancing around, Adria saw the corridor was otherwise deserted. “I don’t think,” she whispered, crouching down to run her hand over the fur of the one closest to her, “you’re supposed to be here.” DarkRiver and SnowDancer were blood-allies, but leaving a child to roam the den alone was a huge step beyond that. So either these two adorable troublemakers—both of whom were now demanding to be petted—had escaped their frantic mother, or they’d somehow snuck in. Adria would’ve said they were too small to navigate the distance from DarkRiver land, but she’d known too many children.

The sound of more claws against stone, right before a tiny wolf pup attacked the cubs from behind. Stunned, she was about to pull them apart when she realized the growling and snarling and clawing was all for show. She rose to her feet, her wolf too amused to think about spoiling their fun.

“That’s a sight.”

The hairs on her nape rose at the low, deep timbre of that male voice, but she didn’t startle, having scented the exotic dark pine and biting edge of citrus that was Riaz’s scent. “Yes,” she said, proud of herself for keeping her cool.

Another scent. Unfamiliar. Feminine.

The cubs and pup jumped apart as if they’d been doused with cold water, and suddenly, they were sitting quiet and lovable, three of the most well-behaved little ones Adria had ever seen. “Little fakers,” she said, attempting to hide her laugh.

Beside her, Riaz coughed just as a tall brunette turned the corner.

“What,” the woman said to the cubs, “did we discuss before we left home?” Folding her arms, she tapped an impatient tattoo on the floor with her booted foot.

The wolf pup barked.

“Hush, Ben. These two were supposed to wait for me to finish talking with Lara.”

Dropping their heads, the cubs made piteous mewling sounds. Adria caught the amusement in the eyes of the woman who had to be their mother, but her voice when it came, was stern. “You have a choice of punishments: either no playtime with Ben and the other pups, or no chocolate cake for dessert tonight.”

All three children looked at the woman in unmitigated shock.

Who didn’t budge.

The leopard cubs nodded at their friend—who was apparently more attractive than chocolate cake. Bending down, the brunette grabbed and kissed each sweet face in turn, including Ben’s. “Now go wait for me over there”—she waved to a spot a couple of meters down the corridor, where they’d remain in her line of sight—“unless you want playtime permanently cancelled.”

Only when the boys had padded away to take meek seated positions, did the woman rise and meet Adria’s and Riaz’s gazes. “They give me three new gray hairs hourly.” Exasperated affection.

“Tamsyn,” Riaz said, the heat of his body too close, too aggressive, “this is Adria.”

Adria forced herself to think past her gut-clawing awareness of the male next to her. “The DarkRiver healer.” All senior personnel had been briefed about DarkRiver long ago.

“If you say you’re not related to Indigo,” Tamsyn said in response, “I’ll eat my boot … if the twins haven’t already.”

Laughing at the dry codicil, Adria admitted to the familial relationship. “Social visit?”

“Ashaya’s here, too,” Tamsyn said, referring to the M-Psy mated to a DarkRiver sentinel. “We want to discuss Alice, go over some new scans.”

“Alice” was Alice Eldridge, a human scientist who had been put into cryonic suspension over a hundred years ago and now slept in a coma no one could break. Adria couldn’t imagine what Alice’s life would be like if she did wake—the world had shifted dramatically since the beginning of her forced sleep. Her friends, her family, each and every one was dust. And yet Alice endured.

“I better get back and organize an escort for the hooligans,” Tammy said, looking over her shoulder at the children with an affectionate smile. “It was nice to meet you, Adria.”

The silence that fell after Tamsyn and the boys left was awkward. However, when Adria would have continued on her way, Riaz shifted to block her. Lines of strain marked his face, a heavy shadow over the beaten gold of his eyes, but his words were unexpectedly generous. “I have some time free—why don’t I show you some of the more hidden parts of den territory?”

Unsettled, Adria glanced up, found herself unable to read his expression. She’d spent far too much time with another man whose face she couldn’t read, so she was blunt in her disbelief. “What possible reason could you have for inviting me to spend time with you when we both know how you feel about me?”

Riaz had expected the claws, his wolf taking the hit without flinching. “Because,” he said, carrying through the decision he’d made that cold, lonely dawn after Hawke and Sienna’s mating ceremony, “it’s not your fault you’re not my mate.” It felt as if he’d stripped off his skin with the admission, but he owed Adria the truth. “And I’m sorry I punished you for that.”

Adria had frozen after his first sentence, horror dawning black and violent over her clean, beautiful features. “You found your mate? How could you kiss me?”

He didn’t want to talk about it, wanted to pretend he’d never set sight on Lisette, but the time for hiding behind anger and an obstinate refusal to admit the truth was over. “She’s married.” In love with another man. Coop was right—he could allow that to destroy him, or he could rebuild a new life from the broken shards of the old.

He was a wolf, a dominant, a protector. To give up and leave his pack without his strength was simply not in his nature. So he’d find a way to survive, and to once again become a man he could face in the mirror with pride.

In front of him, Adria’s eyes turned the pale, haunting amber of her wolf in painful sympathy. His jaw set. He didn’t want pity, had told her only because she’d borne the brunt of his rage when she’d never been at fault. But there was no hint of pity in her response, simply a warm generosity of spirit that rocked him. “If your wolf isn’t troubled by my presence,” she said, “then I’d appreciate your help.”

Troubled?

Riaz swallowed a harsh laugh. “We’ll drive out of the section you already know well,” he said, determined to treat her with the courtesy he should’ve shown her from the start, regardless of the touch-hunger that continued to claw at him, “and explore a less accessible part of the remaining area on foot.”

Adria stayed silent until they’d driven for at least ten minutes, but it was a silence heavy with things unsaid. When she did speak, he flinched.

“Did you … have a chance?”

His hands flexed on the wheel. “She loves her husband. I just found her too late.” He regretted saying as much as he had as soon as he’d spoken, his wolf uncomfortable with the sudden, stark vulnerability. “Indigo knows the bare facts”—and he wished she didn’t—“but no one else does, so if you could—”

“I won’t say a word,” she promised in that slightly husky voice that was an unintended provocation. “You can talk to me about it, you know.” A hesitation. “It can’t be good for you to hold everything inside.”

Shifting the vehicle into hover mode, he took them over a rocky patch. “There’s not much to talk about.” He wasn’t being obdurate—what else was there to say? Lisette belonged to another man, and Riaz had to figure out a way to live with that.

“No, I suppose there isn’t.” Not speaking again till they stepped out of the vehicle in a relatively isolated section of den territory, she said, “Let’s stay in human form. It’ll be easier to talk.”

He nodded—a few sections would be tricky to navigate on two feet, but they could always reconsider shifting at that stage.

As they walked, he saw Adria take in everything with those stunning eyes of blue-violet. It was the first time he’d really looked at her, not blinded by the caustic mix of anger and desire that had colored their earlier interactions. There was a steely strength to her gaze—as if she’d been tempered in pain and come out of it harder, less breakable.

His fascination with her shifted a fraction, became more subtle, more complex … more disturbing, as he realized he wanted to know of the crucible that had honed her. “There’s something you should see here,” he said, caught between the competing needs of a fidelity that would destroy him, and a silken betrayal that might tear him apart.