The Ranch

Chapter 12

On their first morning at the ranch, Zoe went back to sleep for a while after Sam called, but she woke again just as Mary Stuart wandered out of her room. Zoe heard someone stirring, and got out of bed, and the two women met in the kitchen, where Mary Stuart was making coffee. They were both in their nightgowns, and Mary Stuart looked up and smiled at her. Zoe looked more rested than she had before, and surprisingly young that morning.

“Can I make you some coffee? There's tea too, if you want it.” But she didn't, and Zoe helped herself to a mug of steaming coffee. “Is Tanya up yet?” Zoe asked, and then they both grinned. “I guess some things don't change.”

Mary Stuart looked at her old friend seriously for a moment. They had been estranged for so many years. “No, they don't. I'm glad. I'm glad I came.” She looked right into Zoe's eyes.

“So am I, Stu. I wish I hadn't been stupid way back then. I wish we'd talked over the years. I'm just glad we saw each other now. I would have hated to have this stay between us.” It had gone on for long enough. Ellie had been laid to rest for more than twenty years, and their old battles could be too. Looking back, it seemed so foolish and such a pathetic waste of time. “I owe Tanya one for asking you here and not telling me.”

“She's a cagey little thing, isn't she?” Mary Stuart laughed. “All the way here on the bus she never said a word. I should have suspected something though. She said ‘we’ a couple of times before I agreed to come, and I think her assistant said something about ‘they’ and three rooms. I thought she meant the kids. It never dawned on me she'd invited anyone. And it worked out so well for me when Alyssa canceled our trip. I had nothing to do.”

“It's a godsend for me too.” She thought of the light on the mountains that morning when Sam had called to tell her Quinn Morrison had died. She told Mary Stuart about it, as they sat at the narrow counter in the kitchen alcove, and sipped their coffee.

“It must be depressing work,” Mary Stuart said quietly. “I admire you for it, but you just can't win.” She thought of how awful it had been when Todd had died, she couldn't imagine dealing with that every day. But then again, he had been her son, not her patient.

“You can win for a while. And oddly enough, it's not depressing most of the time. You learn to take the little victories, you get more and more determined to win the fight. And sometimes you lose.” She lost a lot of the time, it was inevitable. But some of it had to do with the circumstances, and how ready the patient and the family were to let go. Sometimes it was just time, like with Quinn. It was the children she hated to lose most, and the young people, the ones who had so much left to live and to learn and to give. Like herself. But she hadn't absorbed that yet.

“You're lucky you found the right path for yourself so long ago,” Mary Stuart said, envying her, and enjoying her company. It was easy to remember why they had been such good friends. The rift seemed so unimportant now. In the sunlight of honesty, it had finally vanished. “I do a lot of charity work in New York, a lot of committees and volunteer work, but I've been thinking of getting a job. I just don't know what I'd do. All I've ever really done is be a wife, and mother to our kids.”

“That's not bad.” Zoe smiled at her, suddenly realizing how much she'd missed her. And in the unexpected twilight of her life, she realized how much she needed her friends now. It was all the more poignant for her because she had always thought she would have so much time, and now she didn't. “Being a wife and mother is a job too.”

“Well, in that case,” Mary Stuart said, setting down her mug, “I think my job is almost over. Alyssa is grown up. Todd is gone, I'm not even a wife to Bill anymore. We just live at the same address and my name is on his tax forms. Suddenly, I feel useless.”

“You're not. Maybe it's just time to move on.”

She was right, but the problem was to where. Mary Stuart had been doing a lot of thinking. “I keep looking for the answers, of what to do, where to live, what to tell Bill when he comes back. I don't even want to talk to him right now. But he doesn't want to talk to me either. He hardly ever calls. Maybe he's going through the same thing, and just doesn't want to say it. He must realize that it's all over.”

“Maybe you should ask him,” Zoe said, and looked at her watch, wondering when Tanya was going to get up, and then she glanced at Mary Stuart. “What time are we supposed to be at breakfast?”

“Eight o'clock, I think.” It was seven-thirty by then, and they had to dress, and then Mary Stuart looked at her old friend with a quizzical expression. “Are you leaving today?” Her voice was very gentle.

There was a long pause and then Zoe shook her head. “I'd rather not, unless you want me to. But it's up to you, you've come the greatest distance. If anyone leaves, I should.”

Mary Stuart smiled at her gently. “I want you to stay, Zoe, and I'd like to stay too. Let's put all that stuff behind us. We both loved Ellie, we all did. She would have wanted us all to be together. Of all of us, she was the most loving, the most giving, it would have broken her heart to know that we hadn't spoken for twenty-one years because of her.” It was true and they both knew it.

Zoe was frowning, thinking of her. “She deserves to have a broken heart, after what she did to all of us. I think I was so rotten to you at the time because I was so mad at her and there was no one to take it out on.”

“I went through the same thing with Todd. I was mad at everyone for the first six months, Alyssa, her friends, myself, the maid, the dog, Bill,” she said sadly, “and he still is mad. I think he always will be.”

“Maybe he's just stuck,” Zoe said kindly. “I was. I was mad for a long time, and when I got over it, you were gone, we had all gone our separate ways. You'd married Bill, I was in medical school, it seemed easier to let it slide, but I was wrong to do that. Maybe Bill is sliding too.” It was a fair assessment and Mary Stuart nodded.

“I think he slid right out the door a while back and I didn't notice.” She smiled and then looked at her watch again. It was twenty to eight and they had to get ready for breakfast. “What do you say we wake sleeping beauty?” They grinned at each other, and laughing all the way, they tiptoed to her room, and pounced on the huge bed, on either side of her. She was wearing a white satin nightgown and a sleep mask, and she acted as though she were being roused from the dead when they woke her.

“Oh, God… stop it… I hate you… stop that…” Zoe was tickling her feet, and Mary Stuart was hitting her with pillows. They were just like two kids, and Tanya was overwhelmed as she tried to hide beneath the covers and found she couldn't. “Will you stop it! Stop that! It's the middle of the night, for God's sake!” She had always hated getting up in the morning, and they always had to drag her out of bed so she wouldn't miss her morning classes.

“Take off your sleep mask,” Mary Stuart said. “Breakfast is in fifteen minutes, and the stuff on the desk says we have to be at the corral at eight forty-five to pick out our horses. Get your ass out of bed and get ready.” She sounded totally in charge, and Zoe was dragging her out of bed by one arm, as Tanya took off her mask and looked from one to the other.

“Did I hear you say you were going to the corral? Does this mean you're staying?”

“Apparently we have no choice,” Zoe said, letting go of her and glancing at Mary Stuart with a spark of mischief in her eye, “if we don't, you'll sleep the week away, and never get out of the room until dinner. We thought we'd stick around and keep you honest. We know how much you hate horses. Without us, you'd probably sit in your room all day, watching television from the Jacuzzi.”

“God, what a great idea.” Tanya grinned, proud of both of them, they had done it. After all these years, they'd come to their senses and restored their friendship. “Why don't you check back with me at lunchtime, I thought I'd give myself a facial.”

“Get your ass out of bed, Miss Thomas,” Mary Stuart barked at her. “You have exactly twelve minutes to brush your teeth, comb your hair, and get your clothes on.”

“Christ, what is this, the Marines? I knew I shouldn't have asked you two here. I could have brought nice people, who treat me right, and let me get a little sleep. I'm a very important person.”

“The hell you are,” Mary Stuart said with a broad grin, “now get out of that bed. You can take a shower later.”

“Great. Now I'm going to smell like the horses. Wait till that hits the tabloids.”

Both Mary Stuart and Zoe stood with their hands on their hips, as Tanya reluctantly got out of bed, stretching her long exquisite body with a yawn, and then groaned as she headed toward the bathroom.

“I'll get you a cup of coffee,” Zoe said as she headed back to the kitchen.

“Make it IV please, Doctor,” Tanya said as she turned the bathroom light on and groaned again when she saw her face and hair in the mirror. “Oh, God, I'm two hundred years old and look what I look like. Someone call a plastic surgeon.”

“You look great,” Mary Stuart laughed as she looked at her. She was so damn beautiful, and the funny thing was she had never really known it. Tanya thought she was plain, and the others always laughed at her for it. Mary Stuart knew she really believed it. “Look what I look like at eight A.M., with no makeup.” Mary Stuart frowned at herself in the mirror. Her hair was brushed till it shone, her skin was still beautiful, and she had put on just a hint of pale pink lipstick. She was wearing a blue cotton men's shirt, and a pair of freshly pressed jeans, and a brand-new pair of brown lizard boots from Billy Martin's.

“Christ, look at you,” Tanya complained as she brushed her teeth and got toothpaste all over her nightgown. “You look like you just stepped out of Vogue.”

“She just does that to make us feel bad,” Zoe said as she handed Tanya a cup of coffee. They were used to her. Even in college, she had always looked perfect. It was just her style, and in fact they all liked it. She was an inspiration to the others, and always had been. And guys had loved it.

Zoe was wearing jeans with holes in the knees, a pair of cowboy boots she'd had for years, and a comfortable old beige sweater. Her dark red hair was pulled back, and she looked neat and casual and very much at ease in her surroundings. But both of them had to smile when they saw Tanya emerge from the bathroom five minutes later. Even with no makeup on, and having been dragged out of bed, she looked sensational. Tanya was simply a star, without even trying. Her thick blond hair did all the right things, as it cascaded past her shoulders. She hadn't had time to pull it back, and it looked as though she had planned it that way. She had a tight white T-shirt on, and it wasn't indecent in any way, but it was so sexy no man with eyes in his head would have been able to stand it, her jeans looked exactly the way they should, not too tight or too loose, they showed off all the right things, the tight roundness of her seat, the narrow hips, the small waist, the long graceful legs. She was wearing her old yellow boots, and there was a red bandanna tied around her neck, and she had on plain gold hoop earrings. She grabbed a denim jacket she'd brought, her cowboy hat, and a pair of sunglasses, and she looked like an ad for any dude ranch.

“If I didn't love you so much, I'd hate you,” Mary Stuart said admiringly, and Zoe grinned. They were all pretty women, but there was no denying, Tanya had something special.

“I've never figured out how you do that,” Zoe said, taking it all in, and feeling the same warm glow of affection for her as Mary Stuart. There had never been so much as an ounce of jealousy between them. Even years before, the four of them had been the best of friends, more than sisters. “I always thought if I watched you get dressed, I'd figure it out,” Zoe said as they left the room, “but it's like one of those magic tricks, where you can see it done four million times, and there's always that single moment when the rabbit appears, and you just never see it happen. You're the only person I know who can go into a bathroom and come out looking like a movie star three minutes later. I could spend a week in there, and I still come out looking the same, sort of okay, pretty decent, my hair is combed, my face is clean, my makeup is on straight, but it's still me. You come out looking like a fairy princess.”

“It's the miracle of plastic surgery.” Tanya grinned, enjoying their company, but not believing a word of it. But she thought they were sweet to say it. “If you get enough stuff fixed, you don't need makeup.”

“Bullshit,” Mary Stuart corrected her. “You looked like that at nineteen. You used to get up in the morning looking like a caterpillar, and by the time your feet hit the floor, you were a butterfly. I know exactly what Zoe means. You're just too insecure to understand it, and believe what you look like. That's why we all love you.”

“Hell, I thought it was my accent.” She still had the mildest of Southern drawls. Her fans particularly loved it when she was singing. “I can't believe I let you two get me out of bed at this hour. It can't be good for your health, especially in this altitude. I think it's bad for my heart actually,” Tanya complained as she huffed and puffed her way up a short hill to the main building.

“It's great for you,” Zoe said matter-of-factly with a grin at Mary Stuart, “and you'll be used to the altitude by tonight. Just don't have any booze to drink.”

“Why not?” Tanya looked surprised. She didn't drink much, but she just wondered.

“Because you'll get smashed on the first three sips and make an ass of yourself,” Zoe explained, laughing at her, and then reminded her of the time she had passed out after some dance, and they'd taken her home and she threw up all over Zoe's bed and Zoe almost killed her. Zoe and Mary Stuart were both laughing at her, and she managed to look sheepish twenty-plus years later, she was trying to tell them she'd had the flu, and Zoe was saying she'd been just plain drunk, as the three of them exploded into the dining room like a vision of beauty.

There were people at long tables around the room, and helping themselves at the buffet, and everyone looked sleepy and subdued, except for a few guests here and there who looked more animated, and were clearly morning people. There was a rumor that Tanya Thomas was at the hotel, but no one was prepared for what she actually looked like. And laughing with her friends, Tanya looked so relaxed and so young, and so incredibly beautiful that everyone stopped and stared, and Zoe suddenly felt sorry for her. Her two friends closed ranks on her, and they took a table in the far corner. Mary Stuart sat with her, while Zoe went to get them some breakfast, but the whole room was suddenly staring and buzzing, and they both knew it wasn't easy for her.

“What do you think would happen if I suddenly stood up and mooned them?” Tanya whispered, she had her back to the room, and her dark glasses on. She had put her hat on the back of her chair, but even from the back she looked spectacular. She was every inch a star, and the whole world knew it.

“I think you'd make a big impression,” Mary Stuart answered her, and they chatted quietly until Zoe arrived with a plate of Danish and some bacon, and juggling three yogurts.

“I ordered scrambled eggs and oatmeal for all of us,” she said, and Tanya looked horrified.

“I'm going to have to go to the fat farm for six months after this. I can't eat all that crap for breakfast.”

“It's good for you,” Zoe said matter-of-factly. “You're adjusting to high altitude and you're going to be doing a lot of exercise. Eat a good breakfast. Doctor's orders.” She was taking the same advice herself, and Tanya helped herself to a yogurt.

“I am not planning to gain ten pounds while I'm here,” Tanya said staunchly, but she was hungrier than she thought, and a few minutes later, she helped herself to a Danish. Zoe had gone back to the buffet for more by then, and Tanya glanced at her with a grim look when she returned to the table. She knew without even looking what was happening all around her. “How bad is it?”

“The food? I think it's good.” Zoe looked surprised. She had thought the pastry and bacon were delicious, and the eggs had just arrived and they smelled good too. But Tanya didn't mean the food, she meant the people.

“Not the food, dummy. The folks. I can smell it.”

“Oh.” Zoe understood, and glanced at Mary Stuart as she began to eat her eggs. She hadn't been planning to tell Tanya. “That. Oh, it's probably about par for the course.”

“Just tell me so I know what to expect. Are the natives friendly?” She was hoping they'd lose interest eventually, they sometimes did when she stayed somewhere, or sometimes she just had to leave and go somewhere else, but she wasn't planning to do that. She had hoped to remain low-key enough to blend in with the other people, but that was hopeless.

“Well, let's see.” Zoe looked at her, amazed at what happened to people whenever they were around her. “Four women want to know if your hair is real, two of their husbands want to know if you've had a boob job, or if they're real. One guy loves your ass. Three women think you've had a face-lift, but five others swear you haven't. There's a bunch of teenage girls dying for your autograph, but their mothers say they'll kill them if they ask, and all of the waiters are already in love with you and think you're gorgeous. I think that pretty much covers it, except for the little Mexican guy who made our eggs and wants to know if the rumor is true that you're originally Hispanic. I told him I didn't think so, and he was real disappointed.” As she listened, Tanya was grinning. She knew that Zoe was probably exaggerating a little bit, but it probably wasn't far off the mark. It was always like that. But as long as they stayed in control and kept their distance, she could live with it. If not, they would ruin her vacation.

“Tell the guy who loves my ass it's real, and I'll be happy to send his secretary a Xerox.”

“What about the boobs?” Zoe asked her seriously. “Are we prepared to make a statement on those?”

“Tell them to read People magazine. It'll be in there next week.”

“Oh, that's right, and another woman wants to know your birth sign. She swears you're Pisces just like her sister. She said you could be twins. She wants to show you a picture.”

“I can't believe this.” Mary Stuart looked at her in amazement. “How do you stand it?”

“I don't. I'm a little crazy,” Tanya said with a grin, taking a bite of oatmeal. “They say you get used to it, and maybe I have, and just don't know it.” The truth was she was willing to accept a lot of it, it was only when it went over the line or was really cruel that it hurt her. And most of the time it was, which was the problem. This kind of stuff, the birth signs, the questions, the autographs, it was all pretty harmless.

“It would drive me right out of my mind,” Zoe said honestly. “I used to cringe for you every time I saw your name in the tabloids.”

“I still do,” Mary Stuart said. “Sometimes I grab a bunch of them in the supermarket and hide them,” she said proudly, and Tanya smiled at her two friends. It was amazing, after two decades in Hollywood and all the people she'd met, these were still the two people she cared about most, and felt closest to. Being with them made her feel safe and protected.

“I don't know how you learn to live with it,” Tanya said with a sigh, “It still hurts so much sometimes, the stuff they write, the lies. It makes me want to run away and hide. Sometimes I just think I'll go back to Texas. But my agent says I can't escape it now. It's too big, and it's gone on for too long. He says if I retire it'll just go on forever, so I guess there's not much point in running away. At least this way, I get to sing, and make a little money.”

Mary Stuart laughed at that though. “A little money” to Tanya was a king's ransom. She saw the look in her friends’ eyes and laughed at herself. “Okay. A lot of money. But what the hell, there have to be some compensations.”

“This is one of them.” Zoe smiled and looked around her, grateful to be here. “You know, if it weren't for you, I probably wouldn't have taken a vacation for another eleven years. This all just kind of happened spur-of- the-moment.”

“What finally made you come?” Tanya asked, she had forgotten to ask her, and Zoe hesitated for only a fraction of a second.

“I got the flu, and I was feeling like hell. And I got a really good relief doctor I know to do a locum tenens for me, that means he's covering for me. That's what he does for a living, it's his specialty, covering for other docs in their practices. He has no practice of his own. Anyway, he said he'd cover for me, and he kind of pushed me. And you had asked me about coming to Wyoming.”

“Good for him,” Tanya approved. “Is he married?”

“No. But he's not dating my patients, he's taking care of them,” Zoe laughed. Sometimes Tanya had a one-track mind. She had always loved arranging blind dates between their friends when they were in college.

“Never mind them. What about you? Is he dating you?” Tanya's infallible radar had picked up something.

“Nope. I was going out with a breast surgeon for a while, but it was nothing serious and that's over.” Mary Stuart knew about Adam years before, but she'd never heard about anyone since then. She wondered if there was a serious man in Zoe's life, but she said there wasn't.

“Don't doctors ever go out with anyone else except other physicians?” Tanya complained. “Talk about staying within the industry. That's like actors. Talking shop is so boring.”

“No, it's not. Maybe no one else can put up with us, the hours, the pressures. Our interests are pretty narrow.”

“So what about this guy, this local tenant’ or whatever you said he was? Is he cute?” Tanya asked her.

“Oh, come on,” Zoe blushed, and Tanya saw it. “He's just a doctor.”

“Bullshit! You're blushing!” Mary Stuart was laughing at both of them and Zoe was squirming in her seat under Tanya's interrogation. “Aha! He must be cute, and he's not married. What does he look like?”

“A teddy bear. He's big and burly with brown hair and brown eyes. Satisfied? Okay? I've had dinner with him once, and I won't date him and he knows it. Okay?” Zoe gave it right back to her old buddy, but Tanya was not ready to drop the subject.

“Why not? Is he straight? I mean, in San Francisco, he could be…” She looked apologetic and Zoe groaned.

“You're hopeless. He's straight, he looks okay, he's single, and I'm not interested. End of subject.” She was very firm with Tanya, to whom it meant nothing. Tanya had decided that Zoe liked him despite her protestations.

“Why not? Why aren't you interested? Does he have some awful flaw? Bad breath, bad manners, a prison record, something we should know about and hold against him, or are you just being difficult?” Zoe had always been incredibly picky about who she dated.

“I don't have time for anyone. I work all the time, and I have a daughter.”

“That's a terrible attitude,” Tanya scolded her. “This is not a dress rehearsal,’ “she quoted her favorite poster. “You can't live alone for the rest of your life, Zoe. It's unhealthy.”

“I don't believe this. I'm a middle-aged woman and I can do anything I want. I'm too old to date. Besides, I don't want to.”

“Well, thanks for warning me,” Tanya said, pushing away her plate. She had eaten everything, even the eggs. “You're a year older than I am, which means I have a year before it's all over. And if you tell anyone I'm that old, by the way, I'll kill you.”

“Don't worry,” Zoe said, grinning at her, “they'd never believe me.”

“They might, but I'll just say you're a compulsive liar. Now, what's this guy's name, he sounds terrific.”

“Sam. And you're a nutcase.”

“Tell the tabloids. I like him. He sounds great.”

“You don't know anything about him,” Zoe said firmly, trying to feel calm about it. She wasn't sure why, but Tanya had unnerved her. She had always had the ability to do that.

“I know that you're scared to death of him, which means it must be a serious relationship. If he were a jerk, you wouldn't care. I think you know he'd be perfect for you. How long have you known him?”

“Since medical school. We went to Stanford together.” Zoe couldn't believe she was answering her questions, and Mary Stuart was smiling at both of them, and putting on lipstick. It was just like the old days. They used to have discussions like that over breakfast in Berkeley. Tanya had been so in love with Bobby Joe she thought the whole world should be in love, engaged, or getting married. She hadn't changed much.

“You've known him since medical school? Why haven't you done anything about him till now?” Tanya looked outraged.

“Because we've both been involved with other people, other lives. I lost track of him for a while, now he's doing some work for me. He's a nice guy, but that's it. Now, are we going to ride horses or are we going to talk about Sam all day?”

“I think you should go out with him and give the guy a chance,” Tanya grumbled as she got to her feet. She hadn't had this much fun in years, and neither had the others. “I vote for Sam. Let's all discuss this again later.”

“I'll be sure to do that,” Zoe said, rolling her eyes, and Mary Stuart shepherded them all to the corral. They were the last to get there, and when they arrived, Tanya's appearance once again made a huge sensation. There were whispers, people staring at her, kids shoving each other and pointing fingers. A couple of people snuck photographs, but she turned away from them artfully and quickly. She didn't mind posing for photographs with fans from time to time, but she didn't want the intrusion on her private life, and she was definitely “off duty.” The Star Is Out, she whispered to Zoe. But both of her friends were good at blocking people's view of her, and the three-some huddled discreetly in a remote corner, while the woman in charge of the stables called out names, to match people with horses. The night before they had all filled out forms, absolving the ranch of liability, and explaining the extent of their ability and experience with horses. Tanya had written down Advanced/Hate them/Will ride only intermediate level with friends. Both Mary Stuart and Zoe were only fair riders. Mary Stuart had more experience, but she hadn't ridden in years, and she had only ridden English. Zoe had ridden several times, but not recently, and none of them was anxious to prove anything. They just wanted to go on easy trail rides. And the ranch had already explained that there were too many guests at the moment to send them out without other guests, but Tanya said she didn't mind that. If it got too difficult because they hounded her or took constant photographs, or she didn't like the people they chose, she could always opt to stop riding. But she was willing to try it for the moment.

As it turned out, their names were among the last to be called, and there were only three other guests left beside them. The head of the corral came over and talked to Tanya personally, as a tall wrangler with dark hair led her horse out.

“We wanted to let the crowd thin a little bit to give you some air,” Liz Thompson explained to her. She was a tall, lanky woman with a weathered face and a powerful handshake, somewhere in her mid-fifties. “I didn't think you needed to have fifty people taking photographs while you got your feet in the stirrups,” she said sensibly, and Tanya thanked her. “I noticed on your card you're not a horse lover,” she smiled, “I think we have a nice old guy for you here.” For a minute, Tanya wondered if she meant the horse or the wrangler, but it was obvious from the man adjusting the saddle for her that it was not the cowboy. He looked about forty years old, and he had a powerful build and broad shoulders. But when he looked at her, she saw that he had an interesting, weathered face, and he was eyeing her with interest. If you looked at him for a while, he was almost good-looking. His cheekbones were a little too broad, his chin too prominent, and yet it all fit together right, and he had a drawl similar to her own, and when she asked, he said he was from Texas. But they were from opposite ends of the state, and he didn't seem inclined to pursue the matter further. Most people tried to find some common ground with her. He was only interested in saddling up her horse, adjusting the stirrups for her, tightening the girth for her again, and getting the others mounted. And as soon as she settled on Big Max, as her horse was called, he left her. The only way she knew the cowboy's name, since he hadn't introduced himself, was when she heard one of the other wranglers call him. His name was Gordon.

Zoe's horse was a paint mare, and she looked spirited, but Liz had promised she was friendly, and Zoe looked surprisingly comfortable in the saddle. And Mary Stuart was riding a palomino. Big Max was a tall black horse with a long mane and tail, and as he shied a little in the corral, Tanya wondered if he was as sleepy as Liz had promised. She had no intention of battling a wild horse all over these mountains. But Liz explained as she walked by that he'd be fine once he got out, he was corral-shy. The head of the corral was being very attentive to Tanya. Far more so than Gordon, who was busy with the three other guests he'd been assigned, a middle-aged couple from Chicago who introduced themselves as Dr. Smith and Dr. Wyman, but appeared to be married. They even looked alike, which amused Tanya and she said something to Zoe. And then there was a man alone. He looked to be about fifty-five, and Mary Stuart kept staring at him, she could swear she knew him. He was tall and spare and had a mane of gray hair, and sharp blue eyes that examined the entire group with interest. He was a good-looking man and even Tanya couldn't help noticing he had distinguished features. She could see that he had noticed her too, and he smiled when he realized who she was, but he didn't approach her. And he seemed equally interested in the others. And it was only once they were on their way that Mary Stuart sidled up to Tanya on her horse and whispered to her.

“Do you know who that is?” She had finally figured it out. She'd seen him once before, but here he looked different. But Tanya didn't know him. She glanced again and shook her head in answer. “It's Hartley Bowman.” It took a minute to register and then Tanya nodded with interest, forcing herself not to glance over her shoulder.

“The writer?” she whispered instead, and Mary Stuart nodded. He currently had two books on the bestseller list, one hard cover and one soft. And he had had a highly respected career. “Is he married?” she asked her friend from New York, and Mary Stuart rolled her eyes at her. She was hopeless.

“Widowed,” Mary Stuart supplied, she remembered reading that his wife had died of breast cancer a year or two before. It had been in Time magazine or Newsweek. And as a writer, he was extremely respected. He looked interesting too, and Mary Stuart would have liked to talk to him, but she didn't want to be like the people who pestered Tanya.

Mary Stuart and Tanya rode on side by side for a while, and Zoe had already begun chatting with the two physicians from Chicago. Tanya was right. Doctors always seemed to hang out together. They were both oncologists, and the wife had heard of Zoe's work and her clinic. And they were chatting animatedly as the horses made their way slowly across the valley. There were fields full of blue and yellow flowers all around them, and the snow-capped mountains were looming high above them.

“It's incredible, isn't it?” Mary Stuart heard a voice next to her and jumped as Tanya rode ahead toward the wrangler. Big Max had tired of moving at a snail's pace, and she had given him his head for a few minutes, which left Mary Stuart alone, but not for long. Hartley Bowman had joined her. “Have you been here before?” he asked casually, as though they were old acquaintances, but the atmosphere at the ranch was very informal.

“No, I haven't,” she said quietly, “it's lovely.” And she couldn't help glancing at him as he rode along beside her. He was very nice-looking. He had a clean, tweedy look to him. He had lovely hands, she noticed as he held the reins, and a riding style that told her he rode English. She mentioned it to him and he laughed.

“I always feel a little odd in Western saddles. I ride in Connecticut,” he volunteered, and she nodded. “Are you from the West Coast?” He was intrigued by her, and the group she was traveling with. He had recognized Tanya immediately and wondered how Mary Stuart fitted into the entourage, but he didn't want to ask her.

“I'm from New York,” she said. “I just came out for two weeks.”

“So did I,” he said, looking very much at ease with her, as he smiled. “I come every year. My wife and I used to love it. This is the first time I've come back since she died.” Mary Stuart suspected it was hard for him, but he didn't say it. But she imagined that, having been there with someone before, it had to be lonely for him. “A lot of people come here from the East. It's really worth the trip. I come here for the mountains,” he confessed, glancing at them. In truth, they all did, even those who didn't know it. The others thought they came for the horses. “There's something very healing about them. I wasn't going to come again, and I didn't last year, but I found I just couldn't stay away. I needed to be here.” He said it pensively, as though surprised at himself for coming. “I normally prefer the ocean, but there's something magical about Wyoming, and these mountains.” She understood exactly what he meant. Ever since the day before, she had begun to feel it. It was part of why Jackson Hole had become so popular in recent years. It was like being drawn to Mecca.

“It's funny you should say that,” she confessed to him, feeling surprisingly comfortable with him, considering the fact that they were strangers. But he was so open. “I've felt it too. I felt it yesterday when we arrived. It's as though the mountains are waiting for you here… as though you can tell your troubles to them, and they're waiting to embrace you.” She was afraid it would sound silly to him, but he knew just what she meant as he nodded.

“It must be difficult for your friend,” he said gently. “I was watching the people in the dining room, they were transformed the moment she arrived, and without even meaning to, they became completely foolish. She doesn't get a moment without people reacting to her, wanting to be with her, taking her picture, trying to be a part of her aura.” It was an interesting analysis, but it was true, and it intrigued Mary Stuart that he saw it so clearly.

“It must be difficult for anyone who's well-known,” she said, not wanting to tell him that she had recognized him and read his last six books and loved them. She didn't want to appear starstruck. After being close to Tanya for all these years, she knew just how annoying it could be.

“It has its disadvantages.” And then he looked at Mary Stuart with a smile. He had understood perfectly that she knew him. “But I'm not in those leagues. Few are. There are probably only a handful of people in the world who have to put up with what she does. She seems to be very gracious about it.”

“She is,” Mary Stuart said staunchly.

“Do you work with her?” He didn't want to pry, but he wondered if the two women constantly at her side were her assistants.

“We were college roommates,” Mary Stuart explained with a smile.

“And you're still friends? How amazing. Now, there's a story,” and then he quickly explained himself before he could alarm her, “for a book, not the tabloids,” he specified, and they both laughed.

“Thank you. She gets such a rough break all the time. It's so unfair.”

“You stop being human to them the moment you're a star. You no longer matter, you become human garbage,” he said sadly, and Mary Stuart nodded.

“She calls it ‘life as an object.’ She says you become a thing, and anything they do to you then is allowed. She's put up with a lot. I don't know how she does it.”

“She must be strong,” and then he smiled at Mary Stuart, admiring her impeccable good looks. He loved her style, but he wouldn't have dared tell her. “She's fortunate to have good friends.”

“We're lucky to have her.” Mary Stuart smiled again. “It was really serendipity that we came here. It all kind of happened at the last minute.”

“How fortunate for the rest of us,” he said. “The three of you certainly improve the landscape.” He glanced from her to Tanya, looking glorious, as she loped easily along beside the wrangler, but Mary Stuart noticed that they weren't talking, just riding. “She's an incredible-looking woman.” He couldn't help but admire her, and Mary Stuart nodded with a smile, completely without envy. “I really enjoy her music. I have all of her CD's,” he admitted, looking slightly embarrassed, and Mary Stuart laughed as she smiled at him.

“I have all your books.” She blushed as she said it.

“Do you?” He looked pleased and held a hand out to her and introduced himself, though it was obviously not necessary, just good manners. “Hartley Bowman.”

“I'm Mary Stuart Walker.” They shook hands across their horses’ necks, and rode on together comfortably. Tanya and the wrangler were far ahead by then, the trio of doctors bringing up the rear, discussing articles and research, and some new research that had been done recently in oncology at Mass General.

Mary Stuart and Hartley chatted for a while, about books, and New York, the literary scene, other authors, and Europe, when she said her daughter was studying in Paris. They seemed to touch on a wealth of subjects, and they were both surprised when the wrangler turned slowly around and led them back to the corral. It was lunchtime. Hartley and Mary Stuart were still chatting when they dismounted. And she noticed an odd look on Tanya's face when she got off Big Max and handed the reins to the wrangler.

“Are you okay?” she asked as Tanya walked over to join them, and she introduced her to Hartley.

“I'm fine. But our wrangler is really strange. He absolutely would not say one word to me. We just rode out, and then back. He acted like I had bubonic plague or something. He hates me.” Mary Stuart laughed at her analysis of the situation. She had never met a man who hated Tanya, certainly not at first meeting.

“Maybe he's shy,” Mary Stuart volunteered. He looked pleasant enough. He just wasn't very chatty.

“A lot of them are,” Hartley explained. “The first few days they barely say hello, and by the time you leave, you feel like brothers. They're not used to all this big-city stuff, and they're not as chatty as we are,” he said, and Tanya looked at him with a smile.

“I thought I'd said something to offend him.” Tanya looked slightly worried.

“I suspect Liz told him to behave himself with you, not to say too much. It's got to be pretty impressive for these guys to be around a big star like you,” he grinned and looked like a kid then, gray hair and all, “it even makes me tremble a little. I have all your CD's, Miss Thomas, and I love them.”

“I've read your books, and I like them too.” She smiled at him. It always amazed her when someone important was impressed with her. She never completely understood it. “I like them a lot.” They both looked shy with each other, uncomfortable with their own success to a degree. Each of them were stars in their own right. He seemed much more at ease with Mary Stuart than with Tanya, and then Zoe joined them, saying she'd had a great morning. She'd really enjoyed talking to the two doctors. And Mary Stuart introduced her to Hartley.

“What's your specialty?” he asked amiably as they wandered back toward their cabins to wash up before lunch.

“AIDS,” she said simply, “and related problems. I run a clinic in San Francisco.” He nodded. He'd been thinking about doing a book about it, but he'd been dragging his feet about doing the research. It seemed so depressing. But he was obviously fascinated by what she did, and asked her a great many questions. And he seemed sorry to leave them at their cabin, and said he'd see them at lunchtime. He went off on his own, head down, looking pensive, as he walked toward his cabin, and Tanya watched him.

“What an interesting man,” Tanya commented as they walked into their home away from home, and she took her scarf off. It had gotten hot since that morning.

“He's crazy about your music,” Mary Stuart said encouragingly. She would have loved to see Tanya with someone like Hartley, although she had to admit they didn't seem to have a lot in common. Hartley was very smooth and very Eastern, intellectual but worldly somehow, and very polished. Tanya was so much more exuberant and sensual, not wild, but so alive. Mary Stuart thought she needed someone more powerful to tame her, or at least make her happy.

“He may be crazy about my music,” Tanya said wisely, better versed in the ways of the world than Mary Stuart, “but he likes you, kiddo. It's written all over him. He couldn't take his eyes off you.”

“That's bullshit. He's intrigued by all three of us. You know, kind of like Charlie's Angels.”

“I'll bet you money he comes on to you before you leave here,” Tanya said with total certainty, and Zoe rolled her eyes at both of them and washed her hands in the kitchen.

“You two are disgusting. Is that all you think about? Dating?”

“Yeah,” Tanya said with a mischievous grin. “Sex. Read the tabloids.” But they all knew better. Tanya had always been, and still was, very moral. Perhaps even more so than the others, and she'd always been monogamous, even in college. “I'm telling you what I see. The guy is crazy about Mary Stuart.”

“How crazy can he be? I just met him this morning.”

“Well, his wife died a couple of years ago, right? So he's got to be horny as hell, so watch out for him, Stu. He could be a wild man.” Mary Stuart and Zoe were both laughing at her, as she pinned her thick blond hair up on her head without looking and instantly looked even sexier than she had at breakfast.

“Why don't you wear a bag over your head or something?” Mary Stuart said in disgust. “I don't know why I bother to comb my hair when you look like that without looking in the mirror.”

“Yeah, and look how much good it does me. Even the wrangler won't give me the time of day. Christ, I thought the guy's lips had been sewed shut. He never said one word to me. What an asshole.”

“Are you trying to pick up the wranglers now?” Zoe shook a finger at her, and Tanya looked insulted.

“I just wanted somebody to talk to. Tolstoy or Charles Dickens or whoever he is was chewing Mary Stuart's ear off, you and the docs from Chicago were talking about disgusting stuff that makes my stomach feel sick, and that left me with Roy Rogers. Well, let me tell you, the guy gets an F in conversation.”

“Better than if he got fresh with you,” Zoe said matter-of-factly, “or were some crazed fan asking dumb questions.”

“Yeah, I guess so,” she conceded, “but it sure was boring.” They heard the bell ring for lunch then, and were just starting out the door of the cabin when the phone rang. The three of them looked at each other, tempted not to answer, but they knew they had to. Zoe volunteered to do phone duty. It could have been Sam about one of her patients, or Jade. But it was Jean, Tanya's assistant. She had to talk to her about a contract. She was sending the originals for the concert tour, and a red-lined copy by Federal Express, at the request of her lawyer, and he wanted to talk to her as soon as she read it. Just listening to her made Tanya antsy.

“Okay. I'll look at it when it gets here.”

“He wants you to send it back right away. No kidding.”

“Okay, okay, I'll do it. Anything else major I need to know about?” An employee she'd dismissed had signed a release agreeing not to sue, which was a relief for a change, Vogue and Harper's Bazaar both wanted to do spreads on her, and one of the movie magazines was poking around to do a really nasty story. “Thanks for the good news,” she said, hating to hear all of it. It brought the big bad world right to her doorstep in Wyoming. She couldn't wait to hang up and join the others.

“Everything okay?” Mary Stuart looked at her with concern. Tanya looked upset again, and her friend hated to see it.

“More or less. Someone's not suing for a change, and some lousy magazine is going to run another ugly story. No big deal, I guess.” But it was as though they broke off a piece of her soul each time they did it, like an old, stale cookie. And one day, there would be no pieces left at all. She would have no soul left. But to them, it made no difference.

“Don't pay any attention to it,” Zoe suggested. “Just don't read it.” There had been some critical articles about her when she'd first started the clinic, but that wasn't the same thing and Tanya knew it better than she did. This was so personal, so hurtful, so invasive, and always so ugly.

“Try to forget it,” Mary Stuart said, and both women put their arms around Tanya's waist, and the three of them walked up to the dining room, talking like that, with no idea of the powerful impression they made as they walked along. They were three very striking women. And from his deck, unnoticed by them, Hartley Bowman was watching Mary Stuart.