Willing

Chapter 10

“What?” Daniel asked as if she’d said his fly was undone.

She frowned, thinking the answer should be obvious. “I hid them in the top of my closet before we left yesterday.”

“Why?” Claire asked, and Josie realized her roommate might assume she’d been worried about Claire looking through her things.

“No particular reason. My dad drilled into me to always put important stuff out of sight when I’m going to be away.” Hence his secret underground room.

It wasn’t anything different than Daniel would probably have done himself, so why hadn’t he expected her to do it?

“I wish I’d been that cautious with my grandmother’s locket, but I always left it hanging from my mirror as sort of a talisman.” Claire bit her lip and went back to buttering the bread, leaving some rather large clumps in one section while barely touching another.

“Don’t beat yourself up,” Daniel said. “It’s not your fault you weren’t raised by a slightly paranoid vet with a penchant for soldiering. Josette has a lot of her dad in her.”

“I am not paranoid.”

Daniel shrugged, and she wanted to slug him. “There’s nothing wrong with being careful,” she told him.

“It’s more than that, and if you’re honest, you’ll admit it. You refuse to have a decent security system, but you practice defensive operative tactics at home.”

“Are you trying to say you can take the soldier out of the battlefield, but you can’t take the training out of the soldier?”

He didn’t smile at her subtle joke like she’d hoped he would. “I’m just saying you’ve got a lot of your dad in you.”

“I’ve never denied that, but I’m not a carbon copy of him.”

His jaw set grimly. “We can’t always control how much of our parents we have in us.”

“Here.” Claire laid a tinfoil-wrapped loaf of garlic bread on the counter, breaking Josie’s eye contact with Daniel. “I’ve spread the butter, but I won’t take responsibility for baking it.”

Josie forced the expected laugh, moving so Claire could get by and put the butter back in the fridge. Her movement put her body into contact with Daniel, and he quickly stepped away, going into the living room without another word. She watched him go, feeling rejected.

Unwilling to focus on Daniel’s confusing behavior when it just led her thoughts into a useless circle, Josie turned to Claire. “Even you can’t get sidetracked and let the bread burn by a computer that isn’t here.”

Claire’s smile faltered, and she sighed. “And isn’t likely to be for a while either.”

“Of course it will. My homeowners’ insurance covers theft. I’ll lend you the money to buy your new laptop until the claim is settled.”

“You really don’t think we’ll get our things back?”

Josie sighed. “No. I don’t. Even when we find the culprits, unless they’re idiots or incredibly cocky, they’ll have destroyed the evidence of the break-in rather than be caught with it.”

Claire didn’t reply, but closed the fridge and scooted around Josie to get out plates for the table.

“Set a place for Hotwire. I’m sure he’ll be here in time for dinner.”

“All right.”

The front door slammed, and Josie’s and Claire’s eyes met.

“What’s the matter with Nitro?” Claire asked.

“I wish I knew.” She hoped it wasn’t that he was preparing to end their newfound intimacy.

She didn’t know what she would do if he expected her to go back to noncontact friendship. Act like the succubus he’d once called her and climb into his bed in the middle of the night with the intent to seduce probably. Wanting him and believing he did not want her but not really knowing what it would mean to have him had been almost bearable.

Wanting him but knowing the addictive and intense emotions she could feel when they were connected physically would be impossible for her to stand. Her sanity would never last staying in the same house with him but not touching.

Not after he’d shown her a kind of pleasure she hadn’t even dreamed about, not to mention a closeness she had never known could exist between two people. When he touched her, they connected on a level far beyond the mere physical.

Didn’t he feel it, too?

The doorbell rang as Josie was pulling her lasagna from the oven.

“I’ll get it,” Claire called from the living room.

Daniel would have told her to wait for him if he didn’t know, with a certainty he could not have explained to someone else, who was on the other side of the door.

“It’s your friend, Hotwire.” Claire’s voice had an odd quality Daniel was in no mood to wonder about at the moment.

He was too busy watching with grim acceptance as Josie quickly set the hot dish down on the counter and ran into the living room to greet the other man. Daniel followed her, arriving in time to see Hotwire wrap Josie up in a hug that required full-body contact.

It lasted several seconds, every one over the first unnecessary excess in Daniel’s opinion.

Claire stood shyly to one side, and Daniel noticed right away that Hotwire didn’t hug her.

“Thank you so much for coming.” Josie smiled up at the blond man as if he’d found the cure for cancer or something.

“It’s no trouble. You’re a friend, Josie.” He turned to Daniel. “Hey, Nitro. I tried to call you last night and early this morning on your cell phone, but I got voice mail. You didn’t call back.”

Daniel hadn’t known his cell phone had almost no signal in the hotel room, so he hadn’t heard it ring. He’d been relieved when he’d listened to the messages after realizing he’d missed two calls because they’d both been from Hotwire. His friend had only wanted to give an ETA for his arrival at PDX and to say he’d had no luck looking for Josie’s dad via the Internet yet.

“I didn’t check until early this afternoon.” When he’d first become aware he’d missed the calls. “By then you were airborne.”

“Why’s that, I wonder?” Hotwire asked, his blue eyes too damn knowing.

“We had a break-in here last night. The whole day has just been crazy,” Josie said, probably thinking she was explaining Daniel’s uncharacteristic behavior.

Hotwire knew better, and his shrewd gaze met Daniel’s. “I was real surprised you didn’t answer last night. You usually sleep with your cell phone beside your bed. And there was no answer when I called Josie’s phone either.”

She sighed. “My cell phone was lost in the fire.”

“I called here. Didn’t any of you hear the phone ring?”

“I was working,” Claire replied, her vague expression giving nothing away of Daniel and Josie’s movements.

She was a discreet roommate, the best kind if you had to have one.

Josie turned an interesting shade of pink, and he waited to see if she would tell Hotwire the truth, but her lips stayed sealed while her moss green eyes assaulted him with mute appeal. Did she want him to explain, or to lie?

He’d never lied to either Wolf or Hotwire, and he wasn’t going to start now. He put his arm around her waist in an unmistakable gesture of possession. “Josie and I weren’t here last night.”

She didn’t pull away, but her body was tenser than that of a member of the NRA at an antiwar rally.

“Where were you?” Hotwire drawled, seemingly endlessly amused by the situation, if the twinkle in his pale eyes was anything to go by.

“We stayed at a hotel.”

“For security reasons?”

“N—”

“Are you hungry?” Josie slotted in before Daniel could even get the word out. “Dinner’s ready.”

She stepped away from him and headed into the kitchen. “You know where everything is, Hotwire. Why don’t you get freshened up while I put the food on the table?”

Josie had known as soon as she stepped away from Daniel that it had been the wrong thing to do. His expression had turned to stone, and he’d been more withdrawn than ever over dinner.

He hadn’t even sat beside her at the table. There were six places at the table, and Claire had left one end and the chair to its right unset. Daniel had chosen to sit on the other side of Claire, leaving the chair to Josie’s left for Hotwire.

He’d allowed the conversation to flow around him without making much contribution, leaving it to Claire and Josie to tell Hotwire about the break-in and their belief it had been the work of her father’s would-be killers. Every time she tried to draw Daniel into the discussion, he answered monosyllabically, which was not out of the ordinary for him, but frustrated her nonetheless. She could just feel him smoldering, even if nothing showed on his face.

“You have no idea where your father is?” Hotwire asked her as he pushed his plate aside.

She directed her thoughts away from her lover and back to the discussion at hand.

“No.” She stood up and started clearing the table so she could serve dessert. “I’m going to finish reading the journals just in case I’m missing something, though.”

“We can start going through the computer files tonight.”

She smiled at him, relieved they had a direction to go for their investigation. “That would be great.”

She hated feeling helpless, and knowing her dad was somewhere out there, maybe even not remembering why he’d left the hospital, filled her with fear.

Daniel had risen when she did and silently began stacking plates. He put them in the dishwasher while she dished up four bowls of French vanilla ice cream and poured a berry compote she’d made earlier over them. Despite the smallness of her kitchen, she and Daniel did not bump once.

“Can I help with your investigation in any way?” Claire asked as Josie and Daniel each brought two bowls to the table and sat down.

“I’d love your help, but I don’t want you missing classes on my account.” Josie sighed, remorse eating at her insides. “I feel guilty enough that you lost so much just by having the bad luck to be my roommate.”

“Don’t say that,” Claire replied, her eyes and voice filled with distress. “None of this is your fault.”

“If I’d kept a better eye on Dad, he could help us identify his attackers a lot more easily and might even have known they’d want the computer files, too. We could have been here waiting for the thieves.”

Hotwire reached out and squeezed her hand. “Not even you could keep your dad from bolting if that was what he wanted to do. He’s too good a soldier, and if you’d been here, the perps wouldn’t have tried last night, and you wouldn’t be sure today that the bombing was linked to the school’s files.”

“Thanks.” But she still felt badly.

She couldn’t help it. Her dad was at risk, and she felt as though she’d let him down in some way.

“After what happened last night, I’d prefer to bunk on your floor out here rather than hit a hotel.” Hotwire had already brought in his duffel bag.

Daniel could have told Josie she’d lost the argument before it began, but he let her go through the spiel about how Hotwire would be more comfortable in a bed and there was no need for him to stay at the house.

He gave Daniel a meaningful glance. “If Nitro can survive sleeping on the floor, so can I.”

After the way Josie had acted earlier, Daniel figured that was exactly where he was going to end up sleeping. He didn’t know if she was regretting giving herself to him, but she sure as hell didn’t want Hotwire to know about it. As much as her denial of him irked Daniel, a woman had a right to choose who she took into her bed.

If she didn’t want him there after last night, he didn’t figure any male posturing on his part was going to accomplish anything more than embarrassing her and increasing his own temper. He had no intention of risking either outcome, so he remained silent.

“Daniel isn’t sleeping on the floor.” Josie bit her lip and then looked up at him. “At least I don’t think he is.”

Stunned by her volte-face from earlier, he tried to figure out if she was saying what he thought she was saying before he responded.

“Where’s he sleeping?” Hotwire asked, his Georgia drawl pronounced. “He’s not kicking you out of your bed, is he, Josie?”

She swallowed and shook her head, her gaze not leaving Daniel. “No. He’s sleeping with me.”

Looking vulnerable and uncertain, her eyes asked him if she’d spoken the truth.

He reached out and cupped her nape, pulling her into him like he’d done earlier, but this time she relaxed against his side. She smiled up at him, her expression filled with relief, and he wondered if he would ever understand how the female mind worked.

He caressed her neck with his thumb. “Hotwire’s not sharing our bed. It isn’t big enough.”

“I wasn’t suggesting he should, but there’s no reason for him to stay here when it means sleeping on the floor.”

“I’m a lot shorter than you,” Claire said from the hallway, looking at Hotwire. “I’ll sleep on the couch, and you can have my bed. It’s only a single, but it’s longer than the sofa.”

“My mama would string me up by my toes if I booted a lady out of her bed for my own comfort.”

“But—”

“He’s slept in much worse places, Claire. Don’t worry about him.” He looked down at Josie. “And don’t try convincing him to leave. He’s about as stubborn as a Missouri mule.”

“So have I,” Claire said earnestly. “I mean, slept in worse places. Really, sleeping out here would be no problem.”

But just like Daniel had known he would, his friend refused to be budged, and after they did an external reconnaissance of the property and surrounding area, Hotwire got comfortable in a sleeping bag on the floor.

Josie’s bedroom door opened, and a tattoo of anticipation started playing in her chest. She hadn’t been entirely certain he would come, even after what he’d said. She’d hurt him when she hadn’t openly acknowledged the closeness in their relationship, and she’d realized it too late to change anything.

She wasn’t used to this kind of thing, and Daniel’s blatant possessiveness in front of their friend had thrown her thoughts and reactions into a confusing morass before she’d finally gotten herself straightened out sometime during dinner. She wanted to be his lover for as long as possible, and if that meant other people knowing about them, then she’d take out an ad in the Oregonian.

He came into the room, shutting the door behind him, and leaned back against it, looking dark and dangerous. “Do you want Hotwire?”

If he’d thought about it for an hour, he couldn’t have found a more shocking question to ask her. Stunned into silence, she opened her lips, but couldn’t make her mouth form an answer.

Finally, she asked, “What?” wondering if she’d misheard him. Hoping she had.

He stalked over to the bed, his expression giving no clue as to what was going on inside his head. “Do you want him?”

“No. How can you of all people ask me that?”

“You hugged him.”

What was he talking about? “When?”

“When he got here.”

“He’s my friend. I was saying hi.”

“You smiled like you were really glad to see him.”

“I was.”

Daniel’s glare could have melted metal.

“Why is that a problem? You invited him here.”

“I did not. He said he wanted to help, and I told him he could.”

“What difference does it make?” This conversation was not how she’d anticipated spending their time alone together. “He’s our friend. He’s got skills neither of us has, and he wants to help. That’s a good thing.”

“You weren’t glad to see me. When I told you I was going to help you, you argued with me, but as soon as you found out Hotwire wanted to take part in the mission, you got all happy.”

And that really bothered Daniel, she realized belatedly. “You’ve been weird all day, ever since you told us Hotwire was coming. Are you jealous?”

As unlikely as she found the prospect, she couldn’t think of another reason for Daniel’s attitude.

“Do I have a reason to be?” he asked rather than denying it.

“You must know you don’t.” She’d been a virgin, for crying out loud. He had to realize she wanted him in a way she’d never wanted another man.

“All I know is you’re glad to have him around, but you tried to get me to go away.”

“It’s different with him; it always has been.” She’d never felt like all the oxygen had been sucked out of the room when Hotwire walked into it.

Daniel, on the other hand, had the impact of a fully armed tank engaged in battle on every one of her senses.

“Apparently.”

“Daniel, until yesterday, I thought you didn’t like me,” she said with exasperation. “Hotwire’s been my friend since the first mission we had together.”

“I didn’t dislike you dam—darn it. I wanted you, and I thought you didn’t want me. My disposition suffered because of it, but I liked you—more than I wanted to.”

“I know that now.” Well, she’d known he wanted her, but she hadn’t realized he really liked her. It was a nice thing to know about a man she planned to take into her body as soon as this strange discussion was over. “But before, I thought you couldn’t stand the sight of me. You’ve got to see the difference between that and how it was with Hotwire. He didn’t…I mean, doesn’t threaten me.”

Daniel swelled with outrage. “I’ve never threatened you.”

“Not overtly, but the feelings I have for you threaten my peace of mind and my equilibrium. Thinking you didn’t like me made it almost unbearable to be around you. You should understand that. You basically felt the same way about me because you thought I didn’t want you. Our mutual discomfort just showed itself in different ways.”

As she said the words, she realized how true they were, and a lot of the insecurity she felt about Daniel and his reactions to her dissipated.

However, he didn’t reply, or get into the bed, or do anything to relieve the tension arcing between them.

She tossed around in her mind for something else to say, something that would decrease his insecurity like hers had just been. “Will it help if I promise to hug you every time I see you after an absence, too?”

“I’m your lover. Hotwire is only your friend. I want more than a hug.”

“I’ll kiss you, too, okay?”

“It’s going to be distracting, but okay.”

Were men always this illogical about relationships? “If you don’t want to be distracted, all you have to do is say so,” she replied, aggravated.

“I didn’t say that.” Then he short-circuited her ability to respond by peeling off his shirt and unbuttoning his pants. “I like being distracted by you.”

“I’m glad.” She was also glad they were done with a conversation she found nonsensical at best and totally incomprehensible at worst.

He unzipped his pants, revealing a bulge that showed their talking hadn’t inhibited his sex drive at all. His almost black eyes spoke messages her inner woman could not misinterpret or ignore. “I’m sorry we couldn’t stay at the hotel longer.”

Her thighs clenched, and she let her gaze slide from him to her once unadorned bedroom. “I don’t know. The ambiance in here is pretty nice.”

He’d brought the flowers from the hotel back with them. At some point that day, he’d taken the time to put all of them but a bouquet he left on the dining room table in her bedroom. The roses had transformed her bare sleeping quarters into a secret garden. “Thank you for bringing the flowers.”

He shrugged. “It seemed a shame to waste them.”

“Yes.” But she would have been too self-conscious to ask to keep them. Sentimentality had little place in the life of a soldier, and old habits were hard to break.

Daniel pushed his pants down his hips, along with his jockey shorts, and her thought process scrambled again. Smooth, dark skin over well-honed muscles made her breath catch in her throat, but even his magnificent physique was overshadowed by the sheer presence and male beauty of the hard flesh jutting out from his body.

“You’re gorgeous.”

“That’s my line.”

Her eyes reluctantly traveled up his body to his face at the humor in his voice. Despite the smile lingering at the edges of his lips, his look seared her.

She opened her mouth to speak, and nothing came out. She swallowed and tried again. “It’s not a line.”

“No. It’s not.” He stood, proud and unembarrassed by his nakedness. “Invite me into your bed, Josette.”

“I thought I did that earlier,” she said, her voice hoarse with the effect his nakedness was having on her.

He didn’t reply, but stood there waiting in silence.

Apparently he wanted something more than tacit agreement, or a statement of intent. “Is an invitation so important?”

“Yes. This is your bed. Accepting my presence is not the same as welcoming it.”

She wanted to know why the distinction was so important to him, but was not prepared to have another drawn-out discussion. She would ask him later.

Flipping back the covers, she revealed the almost there, sheer pink panties and short stretchy tank top she’d put on for bed. She didn’t own sexy nightwear, other than the gown he had given her, but had started buying more feminine underwear some time ago…right about the time she met Daniel.

His dark brown gaze showed no disappointment in her lack of a proper negligee.

“Come to my bed, Daniel. I want you.”

His nostrils flared, his jaw locking into granitelike firmness, and he came over her in a silent rush that left her tumbled back against the pillows.

“Do you want to feed your obsession some more?” she asked breathlessly.

He shook his head as though her words bothered him. “I want to make love with a very sexy woman, with my woman.”

She cupped his face and drew his head down until their lips were almost touching. “Make love with me, Daniel. Make me feel like a sexy woman, like your woman.”

He made her feel like living fire. Taking what little clothes she wore off of her with a lot more urgency than he had shed his, his mouth devoured what his hands had uncovered, sending flames licking through her feminine core. As she arched under his lips and exploring hands, desire to consume him with the same blazing inferno inside her pierced her being.

She wanted him to feel everything she was experiencing, everything! The fundamental desire to be with a man created to be the other half of her. The agonizing emotion she had never expected to experience. The clawing need for completion that came from the sharing of spirit as well as flesh.

She needed him to feel it all.

Flipping out from under him, she pushed him onto his back, and he let her, his eyes black with need she would never again mistake for anger. She straddled him, shuddering when her labia kissed his erection. It was so profoundly intimate, she wanted to engrave the sensation on her mind for all of eternity.

His big body went rigid, and she smiled, loving this evidence of her effect on him. Licking her lips in needy anticipation, she gave in to the uncontrollable desire to lift her pelvis slightly, only to come back down and kiss his hard sex again with her highly lubricated flesh.

“Don’t do that,” he said harshly.

“What? This…” And she moved her pelvis once more.

He groaned and arched up to meet her hungry femininity. “Don’t lick your lips.”

Didn’t he know that after saying that, she had no choice but to do it again?

“Why not?” she asked before slowly running her tongue along first her upper and then lower lip.

He watched her as if his gaze were welded to her mouth. “It makes me crazy.”

She rocked so her swelling flesh caressed the entire length of his velvety hardness. “I like making you crazy.” Then she bent forward and kissed him all over his smooth, rock-hard chest, nipping him below one nipple with her teeth.

“Josette.”

“I have absolutely no desire to do this to Hotwire.”

“Good,” he growled.

“This either.” And she circled his nipple with her tongue until it was as hard as the rest of him and then sucked on it while he pulled in air like a man put on oxygen to survive.

After several seconds of the sensual torment, he grabbed her head and tugged her face up to his. She kissed him with hot, open-mouthed intensity that he returned with aggressive passion. His hands moved down her spine and over her backside until one finger slipped into the intimate crevice at the apex of her thighs.

She wriggled against the teasing finger, aching already for a more solid possession.

Moaning, she rubbed her clitoris against his sex in an effort to assuage the growing ache in her lower body. It wasn’t enough, but heat pooled in her womb while her inner muscles clenched, telling her climax was imminent. She wasn’t ready for the intimacy and touching to end. She wanted to come with him fully imbedded inside her, their flesh joined as deeply as possible. Only, she couldn’t stop her body’s movement, and she moved closer and closer to losing all control.

Whimpering, she tilted her pelvis and lifted her hips without thought until his hardness was poised at the entrance to where she most wanted him to be. Fingers like vises locked around her waist and stopped her from taking him fully inside.