Willing

Chapter 7

It occurred to him belatedly he should maybe have waited to let her see him naked until after he had excited her to the point of no return.

“Is it always that big?” Damned if she didn’t sound intrigued by the prospect.

“Only when I’m excited.”

She rolled her eyes, her lips twisting wryly. “I may be a virgin, but I’m not an idiot. I knew that. I meant, are you always this big when you’re excited?”

“I’ve never measured it.”

“Oh.” Her face fell. “So, you don’t know how big it is?”

“What the hell difference does it make?” And how could she manage to talk right now? All he wanted to do was get inside her and stay there until neither of them could walk afterward.

She zeroed in on his hard-on with her too innocent green eyes and licked her lips. “It doesn’t make any difference at all. It’s just I’ve read some stuff…”

What kind of stuff had she been reading where a man’s penile dimensions mattered? “Reading isn’t the same thing as doing,” he growled, not liking the prospect she found reality less exciting than her reading material.

“I figured that out the first time you kissed me.”

“Are you saying you’d never been kissed before?”

“No, but I never wanted a kiss to continue. I never wanted a man to let me taste his tongue.”

His knees about buckled. “You acted like you didn’t want that one to either.”

“Yeah. What a wasted opportunity that was. I thought you were only doing it for our cover.”

“I wasn’t.”

“I know.” Then she looked at him through her black lashes, her lips glistening from her tongue’s sweep over them. “Will you do it again not for cover?”

He couldn’t believe she thought she had to ask.

“Lie down.”

“Why?” she asked with a puzzled frown.

“I want to see all of you.” Especially what was hidden by her tightly closed thighs.

“I want you to kiss me.”

“Lie down first.”

“You’ll kiss me again if I do?”

“Yeah.”

She let her torso fall back, and then reclined stiff on the bed like a sleeping nun. He couldn’t help it. He smiled. She was such a mixture of innocence and passion.

And for tonight, she was all his.

He closed his fingers around both her ankles and pulled, but she resisted.

“I want to see.”

Her breath grew choppy, and the pulse in her throat beat a wild tattoo under her skin, but she said, “Okay.”

Her eyes wide, she let him separate her ankles and push her knees up until he could see the swollen, dark pink folds of her feminine sex.

Letting go of her ankles, he reached out and fluffed the soft, curling hair on her mound. “Pretty.”

It was the same color as the hair on her head, right down to the red highlights. He should have known those wouldn’t have come from a bottle. Not with Josie.

“Uh…thank you?”

He laughed, something he’d never done in the bedroom. “You’re welcome.”

Dipping his fingertip into the dewy warmth of her, he felt his dick bob in response to her silky wetness. She was going to feel so good around him. He’d never touched anything so soft.

She moaned and tilted her pelvis up. “Touch me deeper, Daniel.”

He loved the ring of his name on her lips. It sounded intimate, and it was. She was the first person to call him by that name in years.

“I’m going to touch you to the depths of your soul before I’m done tonight, sweetheart,” he promised, pressing his finger in up to the first knuckle.

It was a tight fit. She was slick with wetness, but she was also swollen from desire and tight from never having made love. Penetration without pain was going to take some major effort on his part, but he didn’t want to hurt her. A man should never hurt a woman.

He stretched her, pressing outward against her vaginal walls, trying to prepare her for his erect flesh.

She gave a voluptuous sigh and squirmed farther onto his finger. “I like this, Daniel.”

Sweat broke out on his brow from the effort it took to go slow now that the moment had come. “Me, too.”

He pushed farther inside until he felt a thin barrier and stopped, but he didn’t pull back.

She flinched, her body going stiff. She didn’t say anything, but she bit her lip.

“Does it hurt?”

“Only a little, but it’s going to hurt more later, won’t it?”

“Not if I can help it.”

She closed her eyes, an expression he knew well coming over her features…that of a soldier facing unavoidable pain and prepared to carry on. “Maybe you should just do it.”

“That’s not the way it’s going to happen, sweetheart.”

She nodded, but remained rigid.

“Relax, Josette. I won’t break your hymen yet.”

She settled into the bed again, her eyes opening and her green gaze fixing on him in question. “Can you, with just your finger?”

“Yes.”

“I didn’t think you could. I mean, I’ve worn tampons for years and it’s still there.”

“They aren’t as long or as hard as my finger, baby.” As he spoke, he pulled out. Then he pressed his finger inside of her again, feeling the way she had to stretch to accommodate even that with a sense of desperation.

He wasn’t worried about her body being able to take him—eventually—but he might just have a heart attack from excitement before he got inside her. Because it was going to take a long time to do this right.

His heart pounded, his breath sawing in and out, and thinking of multiplication tables did nothing to decrease his raging desire. Not when she was right there, naked in front of him. “I’m going to put a second finger inside you now. Okay?”

“Yes.” The word ended on a long hiss of sound as he did just that, carefully sliding his middle and forefinger in together.

Once again, he stretched her, massaging her silken tissues until his fingers slid more easily in and out of her.

“I thought you were going to kiss me,” she said, panting between each word, her hips moving betrayingly against his hand.

“I am.”

“When?” she demanded, sounding meaner than he’d ever heard her, and he grinned.

“Now.” And he did, but not where she was expecting him to.

Using his free hand, he separated her vulva so her clitoris was completely exposed to him and then pressed his open mouth over the engorged bud and kissed.

She cried out, arching off the bed, and grabbed his hair with both hands with all the strength of the warrior she was.

The pain of having his hair pulled gave him a primitive pleasure no woman could understand, and he laved her clitoris with his tongue, teasing her with the touch he knew was not quite enough to send her over. He kept it up until she was making mindless sounds that went straight to his sex.

Needing to experience more of her, he explored her entire vulva, getting drunk on her spicy sweetness and the incredible softness of her swollen lips. He pressed his tongue inside her along with his fingers, stretching her farther and getting more of the taste he craved like a child who’d had his first piece of candy. But he couldn’t get enough.

He pulled his fingers out and tongued her as deeply as he could go, his whole body vibrating with the pleasure he got from tasting her.

She called out his name, her voice hollow and desperate. Trying to pull his mouth away, she yanked on his head, and when that didn’t work, she tried pushing his shoulders with her feet, but he locked his hands on her hips and kept on.

He knew what she needed, and it wasn’t for him to stop.

When she gave up pushing with her legs, he moved his mouth back to her now quivering clitoris and slid his fingers back inside her. He thrashed her violently excited nub with his tongue until her body went stiff with preclimax tension, and then he gently took her between his teeth and sucked.

She screamed, she bucked and she begged. For him to stop. For him to keep going. Until eventually his name was the only intelligible sound coming from her mouth as hot wetness gushed from her inner core. Her body shivered for a prolonged climax that kicked him right in the chest with an emotion he didn’t understand.

She was amazing.

As the shivers receded, he gentled her with his mouth, but didn’t let her come completely down again. He had been pressing his fingers against her inner barrier with a steadily increasing pressure, but now he withdrew.

Using his knowledge of the sensitivity of a woman’s vaginal entrance, he caressed her while using his tongue on her sweetest spot to reignite the flame of need he’d so recently quenched.

His hard penis ached, as though someone had tied it in a knot and was pulling on it. He needed to come so bad, but he had something to do before they could make love completely.

This time she whimpered as her pleasure grew, repeating his name over and over again in a breathless voice, filled with drugged passion, and he had that kick-in-the-chest feeling again.

He started making love to her again with his fingers, pressing deeper with every thrust until she once again arched in utter abandon, her body tense as a bowstring ready to shoot.

He lifted his mouth so he could see her face and watch for discomfort before pushing through her barrier with less effort than a hot knife cut through butter. Her body jerked, but then she started riding his fingers, convulsing in another climax almost immediately, her face contorted with undeniable ecstasy.

He waited until she fell limply against the bed before kissing the top of her mound and then pulling his fingers from inside her and rolling to his feet.

“Where are you going?” Her voice was slurred and hoarse, her eyes filled with wonder at what she’d just experienced.

“To get something to clean you up. I’ll be right back.”

“S’okay.” Her head fell to the side, her eyes sliding shut.

Josie didn’t know how long Daniel had been gone. She was floating in a sort of waking dream, her body in a state of shock from the pleasure he’d given her. Then she felt a gentle warmth between her legs, and she forced her eyelids to open.

He was kneeling between her legs, a washcloth in his hand.

“What are you doing?” Was that croaky voice hers? She sounded like a refugee from a smokers’ anonymous support group.

“Washing away the blood.”

“Blood?” Was she supposed to bleed after climaxing?

He didn’t seem bothered, so she didn’t get all that worried, but she couldn’t remember ever reading about anything like that before. Oh, man…What if she’d started her period? How gross would that be? Only, she wasn’t even due for a couple of weeks.

“What blood?”

“I broke your hymen.”

“You did?” He’d dispensed with the physical evidence of her virginity? Already?

“Didn’t you feel it?” His dark eyes probed her, as if looking for the truth.

She smiled weakly. It was the best she could manage in her sensually exhausted state. “I don’t remember. You made me insensate with pleasure. I didn’t know it would be like that.”

“It isn’t always.”

No. It wouldn’t be, but she felt things for him that transcended the physical, and that was bound to make lovemaking with him more intense.

“So, I’m not a virgin anymore?”

“You’re a virgin who isn’t going to hurt the first time she makes love.”

Finally, she understood what he’d been doing, and her heart contracted with feelings unlike anything she’d ever known. Her dad’s idea of protection had been to teach her to protect herself. She’d never been cosseted, had never known a sense of feminine fragility with a man.

Daniel had given her both.

“Thank you.”

He shrugged. “Men should not hurt women.”

“But it isn’t always possible to avoid it…the first time, I mean.”

He moved his shoulders again, his expression unreadable.

She went up on one elbow to better see him and sucked in a breath of shock. Even her less than experienced eyes could see that his patience had come at a cost. His erection jutted out and up, purplish veins pulsing with blood standing out in angry relief against his smooth, dark skin.

“You hurt.”

His mouth twisted. “Yeah.”

“So you thought it was better to suffer pain yourself than let me feel it?”

“Always.” He dried between her legs with a soft hand towel and then tossed it and the washcloth on the floor. “I’m going to make taking me pure pleasure for you.” His head came up as he said it, his expression feral.

She shivered with anticipation.

Never dread. A man who controlled his own desire to such an extent simply so he would not put her through a natural part of making love the first time would never, ever hurt her in any way.

Physically, her mind amended, knowing that emotional pain was waiting for her down the road with this man. The chances of him wanting a permanent commitment were small. Even if he did, she could have him only at the expense of her dreams of living a more normal life and leaving the soldier existence behind.

She shoved all that to the back of her mind and put her hands out to him. “Make love to me, Daniel. Please.”

He came over her, his mouth settling on hers with hungry need that turned her insides out and her already jellylike legs to water. Incredibly, he set about exciting her again, while her hands explored whatever she could reach of his body.

When she encountered his hardness, he groaned and pulled her hand away.

“Don’t you like it?” she asked against his lips.

“If you touch me, I’ll come.”

“Yes.” Oh, she liked that.

“I want to be inside you when that happens.”

“Then get inside me, Daniel,” she said between kisses. “Do it now.”

His smile went clear to her toes. “Yes, ma’am.”

He looped her knees over his forearms and pressed upward so she was fully open to him in a way she could never have imagined being comfortable with, but she liked it. A lot.

Nudging her opening with the blunt tip of his shaft, he asked, “Now?”

She arched up—“Yes, now”—and felt the beginning of his possession.

Then he reared backward, pulling out completely, a particularly vile four-letter word coming out of his mouth.

“What?” she asked in shock, her heart hammering against her ribs.

“I almost forgot the rubber.”

“You mean we don’t have one?” she asked, ready to blow something up or take an unforgivable chance if he said they didn’t.

He lunged across the bed without answering and jerked the drawer open on the small night table. He grabbed something and then went up on his haunches, the evidence of his desire and his body leaning intimidatingly over her. With shaking hands that shocked her more than his withdrawal, he ripped open the package and then rolled the condom on.

“The suite came supplied with condoms?” she asked in disbelief as he came back over her.

“They do if you pay the concierge enough.” Then his mouth locked with hers again, his tongue thrusting between her lips with exciting force, making it impossible to speak anymore.

Once again, he looped her legs over his arms and pushed them wide, but this time he didn’t ask if she was ready. He had to know she was beyond ready. His broad head pressed inside her, and while she felt as though she was stretching beyond what her body should allow, she experienced no real pain.

He rocked against her, sending sensation arcing through her body with each deepened thrust until he was seated to the hilt and their pubic hair meshed.

She felt impaled and couldn’t move, but she wanted him to.

“Are you all right?” he asked, his brow glistening with sweat, the effort it took to hold back reflected in the tense lines of his hard face, the rigid set of his shoulders.

“More than all right.”

“Are you okay if I move?”

“Please…” She bit her lip, trying not to yell demands at him, but gave up when the movement he made was so small it was more torture than assuagement. She grabbed his head, her fingers curling into his dark, silky hair, and held on tight. “Move, Daniel. I want you to come inside me!”

Something seemed to break within him. Maybe it was his control. He began moving, pounding in and out of her with the power and speed of a jackhammer.

She loved every second of it and felt another stunning climax begin to build deep in her womb. Incredibly, he grew inside her. It should have been impossible, considering the condition he’d been in to begin with, but he got even harder, massaging her core in ways she couldn’t fathom.

She clenched around him in involuntary spasms, on the edge of an explosion bigger than any bomb she’d ever built. He gave a deafening shout as his whole body went rigid in sexual ecstasy, and the explosion hit, rocking her foundation with its power.

She couldn’t even scream, the pleasure was so great, and her mouth opened on a silent, prolonged cry as her body convulsed around him.

Afterward, he collapsed on top of her, his face turned away on the pillow.

His dark hair was wild and wet with sweat, and she kissed it, emotion tearing at her insides with too much beauty to be borne. “Thank you.”

He mumbled something, but she couldn’t understand what, and then didn’t say anything else. She smiled, resting her face against his head. Her eyes drooped, and she felt herself slipping into sleep.

Daniel forced himself to disengage from Josie, so he could take care of the condom. Otherwise he probably would have stayed inside her all night long. And smothered her to death.

She was so tiny compared to him. She’d laugh in his face if he told her he thought she was fragile, but it was how he saw her, and that would probably never change. He’d seen her hold her own in combat, but that didn’t seem to matter to the part of him that claimed her as his woman.

For now.

Not even a woman raised to be a soldier could stay in his life forever. He wasn’t capable of that kind of permanent intimacy, but they had now. He was going to revel in the present, for once dismissing both his pain-filled, guilt-ridden past and the certain loneliness of the future.

Josie woke surrounded by heat and hard muscle. The room was dark, the heavy drapes on the window blocking everything but a crack of light from the streetlights outside. She could make out the murky shape of the dresser against the far wall, the one practically covered by a huge bouquet of roses. She could still smell the sweet fragrance of the flowers, but Daniel’s scent was even more tantalizing.

The man-woman aroma of their lovemaking clung to him, enveloping her in an intimacy she’d never known. Josie snuggled in closer, becoming immediately aware of hard flesh pressing against her backside as a stifled groan sounded from Daniel’s throat. She wiggled again, as intoxicated by his reaction to her as the memory of the way he made her feel.

He sucked in air as if she’d hit him, and a hard hand clamped on to her hip, stilling her movement. Did he think she was asleep?

She scooted out from under his hand and turned over to face him. Pressing her body against his, she welcomed the feel of his erection against her belly.

His big body shook, and he groaned again, this time a lot more loudly.

She looked up at him, unable to make out much more than the shape of his head in the darkness. “Hi.”

“Hi.” His voice sounded strangled.

“I couldn’t help but notice you were awake.”

“I’ve been awake for an hour.”

She reached down between them and closed her fingers around the heated flesh of his arousal. “Like this?”

“Yes.”

“Why didn’t you wake me up?” She brushed up and down his length, amazed at how velvetlike and hot his skin was.

His hand clamped over her wrist. “Stop that.”

“Why?” she asked again.

“You’ll make me lose control.”

After the way he’d made love to her earlier, putting her comfort ahead of his desire, she didn’t think it would be possible. “Would I?”

“Yes.”

“Good.”

“No, it’s not.”

“I don’t see why.” She was no longer a virgin. She could handle him going a little wild. In fact, she looked forward to it. She shouldn’t be the only one losing connection with reality when they made love.

“We can’t make love right now.”

“Did you only get one condom from the concierge?”

“No.”

She leaned forward and inhaled against him before pressing an open-mouthed kiss to his smooth chest. He tasted spicy and all male. She couldn’t help flicking her tongue out to explore more of his skin. His muscles were rock hard and so were the small nipples her lips found in the darkness. She circled one with her tongue and then bit it very gently.

He made the sound of a dying man faced with Heaven, but consigned to Hell. “Stop.”

“I don’t want to.”

“If you don’t, I’m going to end up buried deep inside you again.”

“And this is supposed to be a bad thing?” She liked, no loved, having him deep inside her body, one with her in a way no other person could ever be.

“It will hurt.”

“I don’t think so.”

“You made love for the first time tonight. You’re bound to be sore.”

“Why don’t you feel me and find out?”

His entire body went rigid. “No.”

“Don’t be so Victorian about this. Women, even former virgins, are allowed to make love more than once in a night in this century.”

“I don’t want to hurt you.”

“You won’t. Touch me and you’ll see how wet and ready for you I am.” She reversed the hold he had on her wrist, looped her leg over his hip to open herself to him and pulled his hand into contact with the slick flesh at the apex of her thighs.

“Damn it…” But he turned his hand so his fingers could explore her.

“See?” she asked breathlessly, her body already quivering from his gentle ministration.

He slid one of his fingers inside her. “Does this hurt?” His guttural voice sent pleasure arcing through her as effectively as his touch.

“Pain is the last thing on my mind right now.”

“Are you sure?”

She couldn’t help being moved by his concern, but she didn’t want it to prevent them from sharing something so incredible as often as possible for as long as they had together. “Positive.”

She pushed on his shoulder. “Now…Can I touch you?”

He allowed her to press him to the mattress so he was flat on his back. “Yes.”

“You won’t tell me to stop again?”

“No.”

“Can I touch you anywhere?”

“Touch me any way you want to, little warrior.”

“I will.”

She grinned in the darkness, anticipation fizzing in her blood like champagne as she straddled him. She should probably start off small, but she’d woken up aching for him, and patience had never been her strength when it came to waiting for something she really wanted. Without further thought, she pressed her swollen intimate flesh against his hardness.

He arched up against her. “Yes!”

Her smile faltered as intense pleasure radiated from the center of her femininity outward. Needing more, wanting to give him more, too, she rocked her pelvis so she slid up and down his length, groaning when the ridge of his head touched her clitoris. Man alive, how did women survive this much delight on a regular basis?

Her thighs quivered with it, and she stopped moving, not ready to orgasm yet.

The dark enhanced her sense of touch as her fingers learned the shape of his body that her eyes already knew. They encountered solid ridges of muscle on his stomach, the turgid small nipples her mouth had already tasted, and then went on to feel the sleek skin over bulging biceps of his arms and hard angles of bone in his face.

As she brushed over his lips, learning their contours in a different way, he opened his mouth and took her finger inside. His tongue did strange and wonderful things to it that made her breasts tingle and her woman’s center clench with need.

She pressed down more firmly against his erection, but it didn’t help.

She wanted to feel him inside her.

“Where are the condoms?”

“In the drawer.”

She forced herself to scramble off of him and fumble for the bedside table. She opened the drawer in the dark and scrabbled around inside for a condom packet. Her efforts were hampered by the feel of his hand caressing her bottom. She stopped moving completely, forgetting for a second what she was doing.

“Did you find one?” His voice reached out in the dark to surround her like warm velvet.

“What? Uh…yes, here…” She grabbed the edge of one small packet and went back to him, climbing onto his thighs and straddling him again.

Her fingers slipped as she tried to open the foil square, and it fell onto his stomach. She brushed her hand across his stomach, looking for it. Finding it, she used her teeth to rip it open.

“Do you want me to do it?” he asked.

She shook her head, but then realized in the dark he couldn’t see her. “No.”

She pulled out the thin rubber, working out in her head how best to get it on him. It couldn’t be that hard even if she’d never done it before. Reaching out, she found his hard-on with unerring accuracy. His fingers curved into her thighs as she gripped him one-handed.

It took some doing, but she got the condom rolled on, refusing his second offer of help when she’d fumbled at first getting it over the broad head of his penis.

Then she moved until the opening to her vagina was kissing the tip of his erection. “You know, there’s something I’ve always wanted to do.”

“What?” he asked in a strained voice.

“Go riding.”